The Marine Makes His Match
Victoria Pade
A military man? Swipe left!When it comes to relationships, Kinsey Madison has one rule: no military men. So when she starts a new job nursing Sutter Knightlinger’s mother, the health-care worker must remind herself that she wants life with a man who comes home at the end of every day. And that means every delicious inch of the hunky marine is off-limits…right?Sutter is a career marine. And for him, that comes with a strict no-marriage policy. But pretty Kinsey can’t be ignored. The nurse works wonders with his mom and his wounded shoulder. Soon Sutter will rejoin his unit in Afghanistan…except he can’t stop thinking about a life with Kinsey. Could it be that his heart doesn’t belong to the corps anymore?
A military man? Swipe left!
When it comes to relationships, Kinsey Madison has one rule: no military men. So when she starts a new job nursing Sutter Knightlinger’s mother, the health-care worker must remind herself that she wants life with a man who comes home at the end of every day. And that means every delicious inch of the hunky marine is off-limits...right?
Sutter is a career marine. And for him, that comes with a strict no-marriage policy. But pretty Kinsey can’t be ignored. The nurse works wonders with his mom and his wounded shoulder. Soon Sutter will rejoin his unit in Afghanistan...except he can’t stop thinking about a life with Kinsey. Could it be that his heart doesn’t belong to the corps anymore?
“No, that’s good. I’m glad you’re all mine—”
All his?
“Not all mine,” he said in a hurry, amending it. “I’m glad there isn’t anyone but the colonel on your to-do list because you’ll have your hands full with just her.”
“With her and your shoulder rehab,” Kinsey reminded.
“Yeah, sure...that, too,” he conceded.
Was he just the slightest bit flustered?
It amused Kinsey to think so but she tried not to let it show.
He opened the door and went out with her when she stepped onto the landing.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she said. “And you, too, Jack,” she told the dog, petting his head and inadvertently brushing Sutter Knightlinger’s arm when she did.
Then she headed for her car, wondering why that bare hint of contact had had the same effect as the first time she’d set eyes on him just shortly before—that odd sensation that had made her skin tingle.
Another chill? she wondered.
That had to be it.
Certainly it couldn’t have been Sutter Knightlinger.
Because no matter how attractive he was, a marine was still a marine to her.
And towering and muscular and handsome as all get-out or not, there was no place in her life for another one of those.
* * *
Camden Family Secrets: Finding family and love in Colorado!
The Marine Makes His Match
Victoria Pade
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
VICTORIA PADE is a USA TODAY bestselling author of numerous romance novels. She has two beautiful and talented daughters—Cori and Erin—and is a native of Colorado, where she lives and writes. A devoted chocolate lover, she’s in search of the perfect chocolate-chip-cookie recipe.
For information about her latest and upcoming releases, visit Victoria Pade on Facebook—she would love to hear from you.
Contents
Cover (#ud1d51e18-7c1d-508b-ab1f-7552eb4ca42f)
Back Cover Text (#u5745e567-79c2-58c2-85bd-8b7b3f9d143e)
Introduction (#u96f911d9-522f-59ef-931a-64dbce94254c)
Title Page (#u805abbbc-3a98-55c5-9b64-93ba9303def0)
About the Author (#u7e112b5c-5eb4-5f2e-a2c0-3fcd167009ba)
Chapter One (#ulink_86d04fe4-cec5-5aaf-ab2c-f3157024c721)
Chapter Two (#ulink_a7d69ddf-18e0-5b07-82e9-2287a1824ff5)
Chapter Three (#ulink_670ac2e0-4c25-57e5-ae9b-aa7062cac183)
Chapter Four (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Extract (#litres_trial_promo)
Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter One (#ulink_aa9dfd78-d9ed-5e38-bff4-6cbe60dde54b)
“Come on, marine, come home!” Kinsey Madison said as she glanced down the street hoping for an approaching car. Then, hearing her own words, she laughed a small, wry laugh and said, “Same old tune.”
But on this November day in Denver, she wasn’t waiting for her brothers to come home. Instead, she was waiting for the man who was scheduled to interview her for a job.
Dignified old homes lined both sides of the street, shaded by enormous trees all bursting with red and gold leaves. But scenic or not, she’d been sitting there for over half an hour.
She was slated to meet Sutter Knightlinger, son of retired marine colonel Geraldine Knightlinger, who was in need of Kinsey’s services as a home–health care nurse. He’d texted that he was delayed at the hospital with his mother but would be there as soon as possible.
She wouldn’t have stayed, but this was a job she really wanted. It came with a particular opportunity she hoped to mine. An opportunity that fit into her own secret agenda.
She’d left Denver and her former job almost a year ago to return to her small Montana hometown. Her own mother’s health had been failing and with all three of her brothers deployed overseas, she was the only choice to take care of her mom.
Alice Madison had passed away a month ago. A short-term job as a private duty nurse had helped Kinsey transition from Northbridge back to Denver. When that job ended, her employer’s fiancée, Livi Camden, had recommended her for another home–health care position.
And just like that, when Kinsey had been fretting about losing what little contact she’d gained with the Camdens through Livi, another way had fallen into her lap via the Knightlingers.
Filling time, she pulled down the sun visor in front of her to look in the mirror that was hidden on the underside. She wanted to make sure she remained interview ready.
Her dark brown hair was long. It fell to the middle of her back when she wore it down, like she had today—parted just off-center and swept somewhat away from her oval face.
Makeup was something she kept to a minimum but she did use a little mascara to darken the lashes around her cobalt blue eyes, and blush to highlight her high cheekbones.
A barely-colored lip gloss moistened lips she pressed together before checking straight teeth to make sure nothing was stuck in them.
She craned up higher so she could see the high collar of the cream-colored blouse she’d worn today under a cinnamon-colored cardigan to go along with tan slacks.
All in all, she judged herself presentable for the interview and again just wished Sutter Knightlinger would get there so it could begin.
So a lot of things could begin. Things her brothers were opposed to her doing at all.
A big black SUV came down the street just then and pulled into the driveway. Kinsey got out of her car and opened the door to her backseat, leaning in to retrieve the leather satchel that contained her résumé and patient forms along with her medical supplies and instruments.
By the time she’d done that, a deep, deep male voice was calling across the yard, “Are you Kinsey Madison?”
Drawing out of the car she closed the door and looked over the top of it to say “I am.” And to stop short at the sight of the very fine specimen of man who had gotten out of the SUV.
Tall—at least six foot three—he had broad shoulders, a narrow waist and long legs that no doubt did much justice to his uniform when he was wearing it. As it was, he certainly wasn’t putting shame to the checked sport shirt and unfaded denim jeans he wore. Not even the fact that his left arm was in a sling detracted from the image.
To top off the impressively muscular build was a face that could have graced recruitment posters to help attract women to the service. Ruggedly handsome, he had hair the shade of wet sand that was cut short on the sides and just long enough on top to comb back. He had deep-set, piercing teal eyes, a longish nose that was a hint hawkish, a great mouth with a full lower lip and an angular jawline that culminated at a squarish chin with the sexiest dimple right in the center of it.
And all of a sudden Kinsey felt the oddest sensation, as if a small electrical charge rippled through her.
Maybe she’d caught a chill.
Whatever it was, she ignored it and told herself to be professional. This was a job interview, after all.
She locked her car and rounded the front end to head up the walkway as he came from the driveway.
At the front door, Kinsey paused while he punched in a series of numbers on a keypad to unlock it. Opening it with his uninjured right hand, he said, “Come on in. I apologize for the delay. It couldn’t be helped.”
He didn’t sound at all contrite, just matter-of-fact and he offered no explanation. She’d known he was an officer in the marines, and his attitude showed he was accustomed to laying down orders and expecting them to be followed by lesser ranks whether they liked it or not, whether they understood it or not.
“No problem,” she assured, having a lot of experience with that mindset and taking no offense. Kinsey followed him into a living room, the whole way accompanied by the sound of vigorous barking coming from another room.
“Jack! Quiet!” her host commanded, making Kinsey fight a smile when the order was completely disregarded.
“Just a minute. I have him crated in the kitchen and he won’t stop until I go get him.”
The man who still hadn’t introduced himself left her.
Kinsey took the opportunity to look around.
The inside of the house was like the outside—no-nonsense. The walls were paneled, the floors were hardwood, the furniture was all dark leather, the draperies were formal and the tables were antique. Heavy, dark and distinguished, there wasn’t a single thing that was light, airy, frivolous or fun. Or particularly homey or welcoming, either.
The barking stopped and the sound of four skittering paws announced the wire-haired fox terrier puppy that suddenly charged into the room. The pint-sized white, black and brown pup came straight for Kinsey, jumping up on her and wagging his tail eagerly.
“Jack! Down!” was the second command the dog ignored.
Kinsey leaned over to pet the adorable terrier. “Hi, Jack.”
“I’d put him in the backyard but he’d just bark his head off until I let him in again.”
“He’s fine,” Kinsey said, laughing as Jack started wrestling with her pant leg, growling with puppy ferocity.
Her host bent over and scooped the animal away from Kinsey’s slacks, holding the little wriggler under his arm like a football.
“I’m Sutter Knightlinger, by the way,” he said finally. Then, nodding in the direction of the leather sofa, he added, “Have a seat.”
He waited until she was sitting to take one of the tufted leather wing chairs across from a mahogany coffee table coated with a layer of undisturbed dust. He situated Jack beside him and the pup promptly began gnawing on the big hand keeping him prisoner until Sutter distracted him with a chew toy.
He began the interview saying, “Livi told me about your credentials—registered nurse with physical therapy training and experience both in hospitals and in home health care. She also told me what you do as a home–health care provider, so we don’t have to go through that—you’re well qualified. But I’m not sure how much you know about the situation here.”
“I know a little,” Kinsey said. “Livi told me that you’re a cousin to her cousins? That your mother and her aunt by marriage were sisters?” The key part to this for Kinsey, though she couldn’t admit that to Sutter.
“You’ll need to address my mother as Colonel—if you call her anything but that you’ll get off on the wrong foot,” he advised. “But yes, the colonel’s sister Tina and Howard Camden were married, making Seth, Cade, Beau and Jani Camden my cousins.”
“Livi told me that your dad passed away a couple of months ago,” she continued. “I’m sorry for your loss.”
He acknowledged that stoically, with only the raise of that dimpled chin.
“Livi said that you were injured in Afghanistan and in a hospital when your dad died so the memorial service was postponed until last week, when you could get back. But your mom—the colonel—had a mild heart attack in the middle of it. I know that she’s since had a pacemaker put in, that she needs some recovery care, and that you, too, need physical therapy on that arm and shoulder.”
“For starters,” he said as if that was all only the tip of the iceberg. “Livi speaks highly of you,” he added, those teal eyes steady on her. “She says you go above and beyond the call of duty.”
Why did she automatically go to thoughts of doing completely inappropriate things with him? That wasn’t the way he’d said it—he was all business.
Kinsey pushed the thoughts aside, saying, “Above and beyond the call of duty in what way?”
His well-shaped eyebrows arched as if he’d just realized what she might be thinking and he was quick to say, “I’m not talking fraternizing.” He glanced at Jack, now gnawing on his toy, and when he looked at her again he was expressionless. The military blank face—Kinsey knew that well, too.
“I’ve had some shocks in the last two months,” he said then, all business again. “There were a lot of things the colonel didn’t tell me—first and foremost that my father was in the hospital. I had no idea anything was going on here. Then I got notified of his death, long after it had happened...”
That did not sit well with him because boy, could that handsome face scowl!
“Left on her own, without my dad around, the colonel...” He shook his head. “At work, at home, she’s always had subordinate staff to take care of things—she was a lawyer and then a judge—”
“Did she have help at home other than your dad?”
“No, at home my dad took care of everything.”
Which made him subordinate staff?
“The point is,” Sutter continued, “my dad looked after everything around here. Including the colonel. Without him, the house, the yard, have gone downhill. And so has she. She’s always tended to hole up, get lost in her books, the journal she’ll probably turn into a memoir one day or her old war movie DVDs.”
Sutter shook his head in what seemed like some frustration. “She doesn’t cook, never has—so as far as I can tell all she’s been eating are cheese puffs and candy bars, and not much of those. She hasn’t kept the house up at all.”
“I would imagine your mother spent a lot of time at the hospital with your father while he was there,” Kinsey said. “Tough to keep up on home maintenance and do that, too.”
“Sure. But my dad died two months ago. When I got home, no one had checked the mail in weeks. There were condolence floral arrangements dead in their vases outside the front door. The refrigerator had rotten food in it.”
“Did she forget about those things?” Kinsey asked in case what they were discussing was the onset of dementia or Alzheimer’s.
He knew what she was asking, though, because he said, “The colonel is as sharp as she’s always been. It isn’t that. She’s slowed down over the years but she doesn’t have any major physical or cognitive problems. This is more about her needing to...”
He raised both hands in frustration. “She needs to change!” he said.
His movements gave Jack just enough freedom to jump down. The adorable puppy went to the basket of toys, ignored its contents and instead began waging war against the basket itself, dragging it into the center of the room. Sutter left him to it.
“I have people coming in to clean the house, to work on the yard. I can set up automatic payment for the bills, set up a grocery delivery. But without my dad, she’ll just keep herself cut off from everything outside of her den—I think some nights she doesn’t even bother to go up to her bedroom to sleep. She didn’t let in anyone who came to pay respects after my dad passed—she wouldn’t even come to the door.”
“Everyone reacts to grief in their own way,” Kinsey offered.
“Sure, but this isn’t grief, it’s how she’s always been. Day-to-day life has never been what she deals with. Her work, the military—that’s been it for her. Except for me and my dad.”
“And now with your dad gone, there’s just you,” Kinsey said.
“And I’m on extended leave until my shoulder heals, but then I need to rejoin my unit in Afghanistan. I can’t leave her the way she’s been living.”
Kinsey nodded her understanding.
“Somebody has to convince her to take better care of herself. Maybe if someone other than me, someone with some professional medical standing, gets on her about it, it’ll bring it home to her.”
“I can do that,” Kinsey assured.
“And she needs a network of support. She has to have people in her life, whether she knows it or admits it or not. She has to have human contact and she certainly won’t go find it for herself.”
“What about an assisted living facility—”
Another firm, definitive shake of his head stopped her from going on with that. “This house has been in her family for four generations, she won’t leave it. And she’s only accepting having you here until she gets back on her feet. I offered to get her live-in help and she blew a gasket—”
“I know it isn’t much comfort but what you’re describing isn’t all that uncommon. So what exactly are you wanting me to do beyond her recovery?” Kinsey asked.
But his frustration level was too high to give her calm, concrete answers. “Anything! I want you to do anything you can to get her out of her rut, to make her let people into her life, to take care of herself!”
It was an outburst that Kinsey could tell was out of the ordinary for him. He took a deep breath and exhaled to get himself under control. Then he went on unemotionally again. “Livi said you have a lot of good ideas. And if they come from someone other than me—” He heaved a sigh that was somewhere between frustration and disgust. “She won’t take suggestions from me. I tried talking to her about this stuff again yesterday and she actually pulled rank on me and just shouted for me to quit meddling in her life.”
Kinsey didn’t suppress her smile this time. “Are you sure she won’t figure she outranks me, too?” she joked.
Sutter actually laughed. He was even more good-looking when he did.
Not that that was something that mattered. She was just glad to have eased some of his tension.
Then, in a more confidential tone, he said, “And whatever you do, you can’t let her know that we even talked about this. If the colonel thinks I put you up to socializing her or networking her or whatever, she will dig her heels in and that’ll be it.”
“So you need me to work a miracle transformation on your mother and her life before you have to leave again—and not let her know you put me up to it,” she summarized.
“Yes.”
The wheels of Kinsey’s mind began to turn.
He was recruiting her for a conspiracy. A conspiracy to get him something he wanted. To reach a goal.
Could she do the same with him?
It would mean taking him into her confidence, something she was hesitant to do. But if she did, how much closer could she get to her own goal?
The chance to build a relationship with the Camdens was the whole reason she wanted this job. If Sutter could provide her with more direct contact with them, things could move along much quicker.
Or he could just throw her out when he found out her true motives.
Was it worth taking the risk?
“What you’re asking is above and beyond the call of duty,” she reminded him, deciding to take a chance. “But I’d be willing to give it a try if you might be willing to help me with something, too.”
“Like what?”
“I’d like to get to know the Camdens better.”
“You already know Livi,” he pointed out.
“We’re acquainted, yes,” Kinsey hedged. “But I’m interested in more than that. I mean I’ve met all of them—I went to one of their Sunday dinners but just in the role of nurse to my last patient. Everyone was nice and said hello, but that was it.”
“And you want more than that?” He sounded suspicious.
“I do. You’re an insider—”
“And you want to use that—me—to get close to them and do what?”
Oh, yeah, he was suspicious all right. She could understand why. The Camdens were one of the wealthiest families in the country thanks to their massive chain of superstores. There was probably no shortage of people who wanted to get close to them to take advantage in some way. But Kinsey wasn’t interested in their money or prestige.
“I’m not after anything but the chance to get to know them. For them to get to know me—”
“Why?” he demanded.
Should she inform him of something she hadn’t told anyone except her brothers?
“I’ll tell you here and now,” Sutter said sternly, “I don’t give a damn what you might be able to do for the colonel, I won’t help you work some kind of scam or angle on the Camdens.”
“That’s not what this is about! I told you, I don’t want anything from them but to get to know them.”
“To gain their trust and then what?”
Oh, he was thinking the worst of her—it was there in those penetrating teal eyes that were boring through her.
She realized that she was going to have to tell him the whole truth now just as damage control. Otherwise, she had no doubt that he’d do everything in his considerable power to make sure she never got within a mile of a Camden ever again.
So she steeled herself and said, “You’re part of the Camden family...” Deep breath. Exhale... “And so am I. Mitchum Camden was my brothers’ and my biological father.”
It didn’t look like Sutter believed her.
“We had no idea until recently,” she went on. “My mother only told me in her last days. Then there was a letter her lawyer gave me when she died. There isn’t any question but I’d welcome DNA testing...”
She paused. It wasn’t easy to be convincing when there was so little she knew herself. “I don’t know if any of them know we exist—my mother said they didn’t. But I’d like it if, before I approach the subject, they got to know me a little. If maybe they liked me a little. If they did, they might be more receptive to the news—”
“For what? So you can hit them up for money?”
“No! We don’t need that! There already is money—a lot of it. Part of why my mother told me the truth after all this time was to explain the money I’d be finding when she died. For me it’s just about family—maybe having some around instead of always being on my own.”
His well-shaped eyebrows were pulled into a frown but there was something about his expression that seemed to have softened around the edges. “What exactly do you want me to do?”
“Tell me about them—whatever you know... I realize that my half siblings aren’t from the side you’re related to, but I’ve heard that they’re a close-knit bunch and I’m thinking that if you’re in with one of them, you’re in with them all to some extent. And maybe you could bring me along if you’re going to be with them—to the Sunday dinners, or whatever else you might be able to arrange. I’m not asking a lot—just for some information and to be around them as much as possible so I sort of become a familiar face.”
Sutter gave her the hardest stare she’d ever endured but she didn’t waver. Nothing she’d said was a lie so there was no reason for her to back down.
Until Jack leaped onto her lap, jabbed his nose into her bag and stole her stethoscope, taking it with him to jump off the sofa.
Even injured, Sutter’s reaction time was quicker than Kinsey’s and he nabbed the puppy before Jack got too far, retrieving the stethoscope.
Containing the terrier beside him on the chair once more, he handed it back to her. “Can you do something with this, too?” he asked, referring to the dog. “I got him so the colonel would have a companion but that’s not working out very well, either.”
“Actually, yes—I think I can get help with Jack.”
Sutter returned to assessing her before he said, “Then you’ll match-make my mother with the dog and with a support system, and you want me to match-make you with the Camdens?”
“That’s about it,” Kinsey confirmed.
Another long moment passed under his scrutiny.
“I’d be watching, you know. Like a hawk. And should anything make me think you’re up to something to hurt the Camdens, I wouldn’t hesitate to warn them. If that happened you’d never get anywhere near them again.”
“Sure,” she said.
More scrutiny before he seemed to come to a conclusion.
He sighed again, this one resigned. “You better be on the level...”
“So we have a deal? You’ll help me while I’m helping you?”
“Yeah, I guess,” he said as if he wasn’t altogether thrilled with it. “But you’d better have a pretty good bag of tricks, lady. And you’d better not be working me.”
Kinsey only said, “When do you need me to start?”
“I’m bringing the colonel home tomorrow, whenever she gets released. I can text you when we’re about to leave the hospital and you can meet us here.”
“Okay.”
Sutter stood then, again holding Jack football-style.
Kinsey took that as her cue to go and stood, too. “Tomorrow I’ll just take your mom’s history, check her vitals and settle her in, start to get to know her. Then we’ll go from there.”
The towering marine agreed with an outward jut of his chin. “Brace yourself, she’s not a warm and fuzzy little old lady,” he warned.
“She’s the colonel—got it,” Kinsey said.
“And you think you’re a Camden,” he mused.
“It’s what I’m told,” Kinsey countered, heading for the door with him following behind.
“So how does this work hour-wise?” he asked along the way.
Her fee had been discussed when they’d initially arranged this meeting, but her hours hadn’t.
“The colonel is my only patient so I can be here as needed—morning till night. Unless you don’t want me around that much.”
“No, that’s good. I’m glad you’re all mine—”
All his?
“Not all mine,” he said in a hurry. “I’m glad there isn’t anyone but the colonel on your to-do list because you’ll have your hands full with just her.”
“With her and your shoulder rehab,” Kinsey reminded.
“Yeah, sure, that, too,” he conceded.
Was he just the slightest bit flustered?
It amused Kinsey to think so but she tried not to let it show.
He opened the door and followed her onto the landing.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she said. “And you, too, Jack,” she told the dog, petting his head and inadvertently brushing Sutter’s arm.
Then she headed for her car, wondering why that bare hint of contact had made her skin tingle.
Another chill? she wondered.
That had to be it.
Certainly it couldn’t have been Sutter Knightlinger.
Because no matter how attractive he was, a marine was still a marine to her.
And towering and muscular and handsome-as-all-get-out or not, there was no place in her life for another one of those.
Chapter Two (#ulink_69b34f28-f07f-51cf-95ad-e7ac1f67dbb6)
As a career marine, Sutter had long ago become accustomed to rising early. But not quite as early as the following morning. By sunrise, he was already showered, shaved and dressed and had had breakfast, fed Jack and was on his second cup of coffee.
Now Jack was in the backyard and Sutter was standing at the sliding glass door in the kitchen, watching him.
Sutter had had a restless, nearly sleepless night.
Kinsey Madison had better be the marvel Livi thought she was, otherwise he was worried that the nurse wouldn’t be able do what he needed done. Especially in the small amount of time before his shoulder was usable again and he was sent back overseas, leaving his mother to her own devices.
The colonel was a tough nut to crack and Kinsey was going to have to damn near work a miracle to effect any change in her.
But he didn’t know what else to do. His father had had a way with the colonel. He’d been able to finesse her into socializing and keeping up a healthy routine. Sutter didn’t have that same knack with her. Every suggestion, every recommendation he made, just set off her temper.
But letting her have her own way was no solution. Merely looking out at the condition of the backyard was a testament to that.
The accident that had ultimately cost his father his life had happened at the start of August and the lawn hadn’t been mowed since. Amos Knightlinger’s prized raspberry bushes were laden with unpicked fruit that had withered on the branches.
The sight of that twisted something up inside of Sutter.
He and his father had been close.
“If I’d known what was going on, Dad, I would have busted my ass to get home. To see you...” he said, looking at those bushes, remembering how happy his father had been when the colonel had retired and they could finally settle in a place they could really call home. A place where his father could watch something grow year after year. His father had babied those bushes and reveled in the berries they’d produced every summer, eating them as if they were a great delicacy.
If I had been here, I would have picked them for you and brought them to you in the hospital...
But picking his father raspberries and bringing them to him was hardly the only thing that Sutter hadn’t been able to do one last time. And all because of the way his mother had handled things. There was a lot he would have—should have—had the chance to do, to say, in those last weeks and days.
Instead he hadn’t even known his father was at the end of his life. And it pissed Sutter off something fierce.
Maybe that was part of why he and the colonel were at odds. Maybe he wasn’t hiding his feelings, his frustrations, as well as he thought he was.
But he couldn’t help resenting that the colonel had robbed him of any opportunity to say goodbye to his father. After all the years that his father had been there for him while the colonel was halfway across the world or just busy with one case or another; after all the years that his father had bent over backward to make every move, every transition, every new school as easy as possible for him; after so much time that he and his father had spent together, just the guys, the colonel had kept him from being there for his dad.
“Not the right call, Colonel,” he grumbled.
But what was done was done and now he had to deal with things the way they were. With the colonel the way she was. He had a mission here at home.
He and Kinsey Madison had a mission.
Kinsey Madison—also part of what had kept him up most of the night.
Her agenda.
Should he have agreed to help her get closer to the Camdens?
His gut said no.
He counted his cousin Beau as his best friend—more like the brother he’d never had. It had been that way since they were kids. But not only were Beau, Seth, Jani and Cade family, Sutter had strong feelings for all of the Camdens. GiGi had always treated him like her eleventh grandchild. They’d been good to him and he wouldn’t do anything that might cause them any harm.
But it was Livi who had recommended Kinsey, so they did already know her, he reasoned. And the way Livi had talked about Kinsey made it clear that Livi thought highly of Kinsey, so any overtures she made on her own would likely pan out with or without him.
He just didn’t like that, because of this deal he’d struck with her, he could be playing a part in anything that might bite them in the ass.
On the other hand, he thought, this did make it possible for him to keep an eye on her and what she was doing. It positioned him to protect them—maybe that was better than if she managed to sneak in on her own.
But he’d meant what he’d told Kinsey—if he got any inkling that she was up to something ugly, he’d sound the alarm and put a stop to it.
And he’d be careful about what information he did feed her. Nothing that wasn’t public knowledge or on public record.
But what about her claim to be half sister to Beau’s cousins?
As much as Sutter cared for and respected the Camdens of now, as sure as he was that they were all honest, trustworthy, ethical people, he also knew that the generations that came before had bad reputations. Bad reputations that the colonel said they’d earned.
She was open about the fact that she’d been leery of her sister’s marrying into the family at the time. She’d said that the men couldn’t be trusted, that H.J.—the founding father of the Camden empire, GiGi’s father-in-law—had been a modern-day robber baron, and that he’d instilled the same principles in his son and his two grandsons, the fathers of the current generation. That more than a fair share of the Camden fortune had been ruthlessly built on the backs of people who were swindled or hoodwinked or used without conscience.
If that was true, if the earlier Camdens were those kinds of men, was it a big leap to think that Mitchum Camden had cheated on his wife? That he could have had a second, secret family in the wings?
Sutter knew what the colonel would say—that it wouldn’t surprise her.
And to be honest, Kinsey Madison’s appearance also supported the claim. She didn’t look unlike a Camden. She was built like the rest of the Camden women—not too tall, maybe only three or four inches over five feet, and compact with just enough curve to her to make it rough for him not to take notice.
And she had the same coloring they all shared—her hair was as dark and rich a brown as the black coffee in his cup. She wore it longer than any of the Camden females, though—all the way to the middle of her back. Shiny and silky and thick...
And along with the hair, there was her fair skin and blue eyes—those blue eyes especially made it seem likely to him that she was telling the truth. Those eyes that people called the Camden blue eyes—so blue they almost didn’t seem real. Kinsey definitely had those.
She also had one of the most beautiful faces he’d ever seen. With flawless skin and a fine, delicate bone structure, with a perfect nose and lush, begging-to-be-kissed lips.
He’d grown up with the Camden females, tormented them alongside Beau the way he would have tormented sisters of his own, seen them through every awkward stage. So to him Lindie and Livi really were family the same way Jani was. But he recognized that his cousin and her cousins were beautiful women. As for Kinsey...he thought she had them all beat. By a mile.
But yes, she did resemble them.
Of course the likeness could be only a coincidence that she was trying to capitalize on. People could look like other people and not be related to them.
But she had claimed to be willing to do DNA testing. In fact there had been something that sounded like eagerness for it in her voice.
Or maybe he’d been sucked in by her. Maybe because she was such a knockout. He’d actually felt an impact from just sitting across from her—until he’d snapped himself out of it.
Kind of like he needed to do right then.
That just wasn’t how things were going to be around here, he told himself forcefully.
He’d said no fraternizing and he’d meant it. There wasn’t going to be anything personal between them. They would complete the mission—if the mission could be completed—and he’d be off again, far away and forgetting all about her.
But damn, she was hot...
“No fraternizing!” he commanded himself out loud, trying to put her in the same category he would one of his marines.
And failing because everything about her shouted soft and warm and sweet and certainly not marine.
It would probably help once he got the colonel home today. Then he wouldn’t be alone with Kinsey. Kinsey would just do her job, the lines would be clearly drawn and he would keep his distance.
Except that she needed to do his physical therapy.
And he’d agreed to answer questions about the Camdens.
And help her get close to them.
He could already see lines blurring and when it came to distance, there was going to be precious little of that.
But he was a marine, he reminded himself.
He was trained to persevere, to withstand anything he needed to withstand.
Anything.
Even if what he needed to withstand were the most beautiful blue eyes in the world and a beautiful face and hair and body to go with them...
* * *
“It’s entirely up to you, Colonel. Your doctors want you on oxygen at night but if you don’t want to do it, you have that option,” Kinsey said to her new patient.
She’d been at the Knightlingers’ house since late afternoon when Sutter had finally gotten his mother home. Oxygen tanks and equipment had been delivered and set up in the colonel’s bedroom, and Kinsey had done her own intake routine, interviewing, examining, taking the colonel’s full medical history and getting to know her.
Kinsey was not surprised to find that the colonel was obviously accustomed to being in control and in authority, and unwilling to give up any of that control and authority to anyone else.
There was nothing weak about the seventy-six-year-old’s will. She had a strong personality, she was blunt and obstinate and she was obviously dissatisfied at finding herself physically weakened to the point where she was forced to contend with a pacemaker, a regimen of medications and the prescribed nighttime oxygen usage. She clearly did not like feeling fragile or unwell, or being treated as if she was.
But she was fragile and recovering from a heart attack in addition to the procedure to clear four blockages in her heart and a minor surgery to implant the pacemaker.
She was also somewhat vain and with good reason—her face sported only shallow lines and wrinkles that did little to diminish what had no doubt been great beauty in her youth and middle age.
Between her high rank in the marines and those looks, Kinsey was reasonably sure that the colonel was accustomed to always getting her own way. Which told Kinsey that trying to force anything on her was a mistake.
“Here’s my recommendation,” she said. “Give it a week. See if you don’t get used to the feel of the tubing and sleep better and feel more rested in the morning. If none of that happens, then we’ll forget it. I’ll call and have it picked up and taken out of here. The choice is yours. You always have the right to refuse any medical advice or treatment.”
“Yes, I do,” the colonel said, aiming that bit of mulishness at her son, who stood in the doorway watching the interaction between them. Sutter had already tried arguing with her and gotten nowhere.
Then, to Kinsey, the colonel said, “I’ll give it a week. But don’t think I’m some pushover old lady who’ll just give up the fight. If I don’t like it, it goes!”
“No question,” Kinsey confirmed.
“Now if you’re finished,” the colonel said as if they’d exhausted her patience, “both of you get out of my room so I can read my book and get some sleep without somebody waking me up a hundred times during the night.”
“If you need anything—” Sutter began.
“If you hear a thud that sounds like I’ve hit the floor, come running. Otherwise I can take care of myself.”
“Or you can call me if there’s anything you need,” Sutter said anyway.
The colonel shooed them out of the room.
But as Kinsey headed for Sutter and the door, she still said, “I’ll be back in the morning.”
The colonel’s only response was, “Catch that dog! He has my bookmark!”
Sutter nabbed Jack before he could slip past him and retrieved the bookmark, handing it to Kinsey to pass to the colonel.
“Insubordinate animal!” the colonel muttered disapprovingly.
“I’m going to take care of that, too,” Kinsey assured her.
But the colonel did not respond and Kinsey didn’t wait for her to. Instead she went with Sutter out into the hallway, closing his mother’s bedroom door behind them and following him down the stairs to the first floor.
When they reached the entryway he said under his breath and facetiously, “And that would be my mother.”
Kinsey laughed. “Basically what I expected,” she said.
“She didn’t fluster you,” he observed with some surprise in his tone.
“I was raised by a retired marine, I have three brothers serving right now.” She laughed again. “I hate to tell you, but you all run a pattern that I’m pretty familiar with.”
His eyebrows arched. “Are your brothers here or—”
“They’re all overseas.”
“Ah, that makes more sense. You said yesterday that you wanted to get to know the Camdens to have family around. I wondered what that meant if you had three brothers.”
“It means that I’m all there is here,” she said. Then, offering no more than that, she switched gears. “You texted that you need stitches removed?”
“It’s been more than ten days since the second surgery and they’re pinching bad. I’d do it myself if I could find any scissors around here but I can’t. I tried to get a nurse at the hospital to do it—I figured they were in and out of my mother’s room every five minutes anyway, why couldn’t they? But no chance of that. They were going to send me to the emergency room to see a doctor and waste my whole day.”
“I need a look at your injury anyway to figure out an approach for your physical therapy. If the stitches are ready to come out, I can do it. I brought another kit for that but it’s in my car. I’ll run out and get it while you take off the sling and your shirt.”
“You want to do it in the kitchen?” he asked.
Take out his stitches in the kitchen, Kinsey mentally amended when her mind went to another meaning of doing it. What was it with her brain making everything risqué?
“Wherever I’ll have the brightest light,” she said as she shoved her thoughts onto the right track and left him in the entryway to step into the evening air.
Where she could cool off.
Really, what’s going on when it comes to this guy?
Maybe the same thing that had caused her to debate about what she wore and how she did her hair for this initial meeting with his mother.
Kinsey was disgusted with herself for the amount of time and consideration she’d put into her appearance today. Since she wasn’t affiliated with a home–health care company, there was no dress code. It was her choice whether to wear scrubs or street clothes. She used whatever she would be doing on any particular day as the decider—something messy, scrubs. Something not messy, street clothes.
Today, the first day of meeting a difficult patient whose respect she needed, she knew she had to go with her lab coat over business attire.
Yet something in her had wanted to dress casually, in something cute. And that impulse had come complete with the image of Sutter Knightlinger in the back of her mind.
Okay, so he was a good-looking guy. So what? She couldn’t let it interfere with her job with his mother or her goal with the Camdens.
That’s what she’d told herself as she’d stood in front of her closet and it was what she told herself again now.
Of course it had only partially worked earlier.
She had put on the tailored navy blue pantsuit she wore as business attire, with the lab coat over it.
But then, instead of putting her hair up to make her look competent and efficient, she’d worn it down, losing that battle with herself completely. Along with the one against using a little eyeliner and a touch of highlighter on the crest of her cheekbones above her blush.
It was ridiculous, she told herself as she reached across the driver’s seat to retrieve her kit from the passenger side. He was a career marine, and that was the only thing she needed to know to count him out of any kind of personal relationship. She could work for him, he could be one of the means to her ends with the Camdens, but that was it!
So no more of this silliness, she vowed as she relocked her car. From here on, her clothes, her hair, were going to be chosen without him as any part of the equation. And if there were any more temperature changes due to being around him? She’d ignore the phenomenon until it went away.
She found him in the kitchen, having done what she’d told him to do—he’d removed the sling from his left arm and taken off his shirt.
As a nurse she’d seen more male torsos than she could remember and never once had there been one that did to her what that first sight of Sutter did. Suddenly she was hot and cold and felt as if everything inside of her had gone a little spongy.
Because despite the bandage wrapping his left arm and shoulder, her view was of bulging biceps, shoulders a mile wide, a superbly broad chest, super flat abs with more than a six-pack—she counted eight rows of sinew that went down to his waistband—and all of it astonishingly sexy. Fortunately, he was draping his shirt over the back of a chair so he didn’t notice her reaction.
She took a very deep breath, thinking that she could have used some of the colonel’s oxygen at that moment, and exhaled, all the while telling herself to snap out of whatever this strange reaction to him was.
Then she went the rest of the way into the kitchen, set her kit on the table and said, “Let me wash my hands.”
Breathe... Breathe... Stop being stupid...she told herself.
Then, shoulders back and reminding herself that she was a professional, she dried her hands on a clean paper towel and turned to Sutter once again.
He was no less fabulous. And now she was going to get up close and personal...
“Okay, sit down and let’s see what we have here,” she said too merrily.
She removed the bandaging to expose a large incision and the remnants of his original wound.
Concentrating on sounding normal as she went to work on the stitches, she said, “So what happened to you?”
“Sniper fire. I was on a mission in Afghanistan.”
An answer with a bare minimum of information. Kinsey had had more than her fair share of responses like that from her brothers. She knew nothing she asked would garner additional details and before she could even try, Sutter changed the subject.
“Are you originally from Denver?”
“No. I was born and raised in a small town in Montana—Northbridge.”
“I know Northbridge. My cousin Beau and I have always been close. I went to the Camden ranch in Northbridge with him many times during the summers.”
So Sutter wasn’t opposed to opening up, just not about his mission in Afghanistan.
“Is this your first time living away from Montana?” he asked.
“No, I left to go to college at the University of Colorado, then stayed here for nursing school,” she said, wanting his attention somewhere other than his wound. He’d been right that the stitches were past ready to come out. The skin had healed around them and they weren’t easy to remove—something that she knew was painful.
Not that he so much as flinched. But still she wanted to offer him a distraction. And keep her own mind on the straight and narrow in the meantime.
“After nursing school,” she continued, “I got a position at Denver General Hospital. I worked there full-time until two and a half years ago—I went to half-time when my stepfather got lung cancer so I could go back and forth between here and Northbridge to help my mom take care of him.”
“Did he make it?”
“For about eight months. Then six months after the funeral, I realized that my mom wasn’t doing well. At first I thought it was grief but she just got worse and worse. I finally persuaded her to see a doctor and she was diagnosed with kidney disease and dementia. I had to quit my job here to take care of her full-time.”
“Because there wasn’t anyone else. What about your brothers? You said they’re marines?” he asked then.
“Two out of three. My oldest brother is a doctor—”
“Navy, I’ll bet, because there’s no doctors in the marines, it’s navy docs who patch us up. Are you about finished?” he asked as she yanked a particularly deep stitch. Apparently she’d come close to reaching his pain threshold.
“Sorry,” she apologized. “You were right that this should have been done days ago. I think that one was the worst, though. They shouldn’t be as bad from here.”
“So after your mom passed, that was when you went into private nursing?” he asked, apparently wanting the diversion of her history to go on.
“Not intentionally. I was closing down my mom’s house until my brothers and I can decide what to do with it when one of the Northbridge doctors called. He asked if I could do some home health care for neighbors of his—the Tellers. They needed help but they were also in the process of moving to Denver. The Northbridge doc knew I wanted to get back here so he thought I could start with the Tellers in Northbridge then transition along with them to Denver.”
“And the Tellers are somehow hooked up with the guy Livi Camden is engaged to, right?”
“Callan Tierney, right. He was kind of a foster son of theirs. He was best friends with their son, and lived with the Tellers after his own parents died. When their son was killed in a car accident, Callan stepped in to see that they were taken care of, along with their granddaughter who is his godchild.”
“And that’s how you met Livi—nursing the Tellers. Livi, who you think is your half sister.”
“And Livi recommended me to you, so I’m here on what’s only my second home–health care job,” Kinsey concluded.
“Do you like it?”
“I do,” she said with some surprise. “I guess it lets me be sort of like family for a little while—and it’s nice working in a home environment. Oh!” she said, startled when Jack suddenly attacked her foot. Then she laughed and added, “And I would never have had a terrier puppy trying to chew on me while I worked at the hospital, so what fun is that?”
“Jack! Stop it!” Sutter commanded the dog, who elected to go on doing what he was doing.
Kinsey stopped her work on Sutter’s shoulder to kick the ball Jack had dropped nearby into the other room to distract him, too.
Jack took the bait and chased the ball so Kinsey could return to the stitches.
“You told my mother you were going to take care of the puppy problem, too—does that mean you have a plan? Because today she told me to take him back to the breeder,” Sutter said ominously.
“Ohhh, poor Jack!” Kinsey said sympathetically.
“We’ve always had this breed, but it was my dad who trained and took care of them. I’ve managed to housebreak this terror, but that’s it. I don’t know how to fix the rest—training a whole platoon of men is easier than getting Jack to behave. And if I don’t find a way to get him into shape before I leave, the colonel won’t keep him.”
A big tough marine daunted by a puppy—the idea of that amused Kinsey to no end.
“Actually,” she said then, “there’s an organization called Pets for Vets that pairs shelter animals and former military dogs with veterans. That way either the dogs already have military manners or the shelter dogs have been trained with them so they kind of fit a little more comfortably with a vet’s lifestyle and expectations. An animal like that might have been a little more to your mom’s liking at this point.”
“I didn’t even know that existed.”
“But now that you have Jack, we can’t give up on him—he’s just a puppy being a puppy. I know someone who works for Pets for Vets and I called him. I thought he could teach us—and the colonel, too, if we can get her onboard—what to do with Jack.”
Jack brought the ball back, dropped it and jumped against Kinsey’s leg, jarring her into yanking too hard on the stitch she was removing and causing Sutter to flinch.
“Ooh, I’m sorry! Again,” she apologized. “But that’s the last one.”
The only relief Sutter showed was in the cautious and slight rolling of that shoulder as if to ease the tension out of it.
“It looks good, though,” Kinsey said, meaning his wound, though the movement caused her to notice once more just how good everything else looked, too.
“I need to do a little bit of an exam—can you wiggle your fingers? Make a fist? Squeeze my hand?”
He could, wiggling long, thick fingers, making an impressively tight fist and then taking the hand she offered, showing more strength than she’d expected.
And at the same time causing her to feel her temperature rising again.
She ignored her own reaction to him.
“Good,” she said.
That seemed like signal enough for him to let go but he didn’t until she told him he could. And even then it seemed as if there was a split second more of lingering.
She put him through a few more exercises, then she bent over and picked up the ball Jack had abandoned, handing it to Sutter. “You can start therapy with a few squeezes of this. Tomorrow when I come, I’ll bring you one of your own and we’ll add a few other things.”
“It’s all gonna work again, right?” he asked.
“I think we can get you back to a hundred percent range of motion. You’re even healed enough to shower without being bandaged, but you might want the incision site covered just to avoid any irritation from the sling.”
“Great, let’s give it air tonight—I don’t sleep in the sling, I just rest the arm on my chest. Tomorrow I’ll slap some gauze over the wound after I shower in the morning.”
So very many mental images ran through Kinsey’s head, but she shoved them away, washed her hands again and then began to clean up as Sutter retrieved his shirt.
Being careful to keep her eyes to herself, she said, “Todd—he’s the dog trainer—can come tomorrow evening after he leaves work if I give him the go-ahead.”
“Sounds good to me. The sooner the better.”
“Then I’ll call and tell him. And maybe we can save Jack from exile.”
She’d repacked her suture kit by then and—still without a glance in his direction—she told him she wanted to peek in on the colonel one last time before she left.
The colonel was asleep with her glasses on and her book resting on her chin, so Kinsey silently went into the room to remove both, managing not to disturb her patient in the process.
Sutter was waiting for her when she returned to the kitchen, his shirt on again but only one button fastened.
Kinsey tried not to look, instead noting that he’d replaced the sling, too, which told her that he still needed it. “The colonel is asleep,” she informed him. “So unless you need anything else—”
“I don’t.”
“Then I’ll get going and let you rest, too.”
She leaned down to pet Jack where he was trying hard to open a cupboard door with his nose. “You rest, too, Jack, because you’re in for a big day tomorrow.”
Sutter surprised her by walking her to her car.
“Feel free to park in the driveway. Nearest to the house,” he said as they reached her small sedan at the curb and she unlocked her door. “If I need to get out I can use the far side.”
“Okay,” she said, appreciating that he was trying to save her a few steps.
She tossed her purse and bag and suture kit across the console into the passenger seat and then glanced over the car’s roof to Sutter. “You have my number—don’t hesitate to call anytime during the night if there’s any problem or you have any question—this is round-the-clock care even if I don’t live in.”
“We’ll be fine.”
“Just in case,” she persisted, recognizing in herself a certain unfathomable lack of eagerness to leave.
But then Sutter said, “See you tomorrow,” giving her no other option.
Kinsey nodded and got behind her steering wheel, closing her car door behind her.
But as she put the key in the ignition, she glanced in Sutter’s direction once more, thinking to catch sight of him returning to the house. Instead he was merely taking slow steps backward. Slow enough that her view was of his belly button just above the waistband of his slacks. His very sexy belly button there amid those rock-hard abs.
And up went her temperature all over again before she turned on the engine, put the car in gear and hit the gas.
Telling herself to get away as fast as she could.
Chapter Three (#ulink_f2225911-4503-5f56-82d8-41586f1bce49)
“Oh, Conor, finally! I’ve been worried,” Kinsey said when she connected for a video chat with her oldest brother on Friday morning. She’d been up since five waiting to hear from him. It was almost eight. “Is Declan all right?”
Declan was another of her brothers and a twin with her brother Liam. The twins were the middle children—older than Kinsey, younger than Conor.
Three weeks earlier Declan had been badly wounded when the Humvee he was driving in Afghanistan went over a hidden bomb. He’d undergone an initial emergency trauma surgery in Afghanistan, then been transferred to a hospital in Germany for more surgery this morning.
Conor was a navy doctor but couldn’t treat family. So he’d taken leave to oversee Declan’s care and travel with him.
“It was touch and go for a while,” Conor admitted. “That’s why I’m late getting to you—the surgery went on longer than expected. But he did okay and he’s not going to lose the leg!”
“Thank God,” Kinsey muttered, breathing a sigh of relief.
“I was just with him in recovery and I got him to move his toes, so it looks like everything is working,” Conor continued. “They recasted his hand when we first got here and he’s starting to be able to use his fingers. The rest of the bumps and bruises and cuts are under control now, too, and I think he’s going to come out of this okay. The good news is that he’ll be sent stateside to recuperate and rehab, and I’ve put in for reassignment to go with him—that means you could have two of us there for a while.”
A while...
That was all she ever got with any of them.
“For how long?” she asked without showing her feelings.
“Can’t say. But we’ll be there, both of us in the states. Bethesda—”
“Maryland. Hardly right next door to Denver.”
“Right. But you can meet us there. And once Declan is doing well enough to be on his own a little, I can get to you. Eventually even Declan will probably be able to travel and maybe stay with you so you can help with some of his physical therapy.”
Kinsey nodded, knowing what her brother was getting at before he said it.
“This is a time for us to pull in—focus on each other and deal with our situations. So don’t stir up that whole Camden mess,” he added, just as she’d been expecting. “We don’t need the complication right now.”
Kinsey had broken the news of who their biological father was when she’d found out. All three of her brothers had had a different reaction than she had. Instead of wanting to reach out to family the way she did, they wanted to let sleeping dogs lie, certain that the Camdens would refuse to acknowledge them, leaving them—specifically her, who had put so much stock into this idea—with nothing but heartache and rejection.
“Now that you’re finished with that job that put you around them, just let it go,” Conor said.
“I don’t want to do that,” she responded, deciding not to mention that her new job put her in line for even more contact with the Camdens. That she’d struck a deal to create opportunities for it.
“Declan and I will be there!” her brother insisted. “We’re all the family you need.”
“You’ll only be here for a while,” she reminded him by repeating his words back to him.
“I know it’s been hard on you, Kins,” Conor said. “We all know it, even though you never complain. And we appreciate everything you’ve done standing in for us, not having us around to share the load with Mom and Hugh...” He shook his head. “But you have to think this through. The Camdens could already know we exist, meaning they’ve opted to pretend they don’t—”
“I never saw any hint that Livi Camden knew we’re related.”
“They could know there’s another family out there somewhere without knowing specifically who we are—do you think nobody missed all that money we’ve ended up with? That nobody ever knew it was paid to cover up a dirty little secret? A dirty little secret they don’t want to put faces and names to, let alone acknowledge? And say they don’t know we exist and you tell them. Can you see that being anything but ugly? They’ll probably call Mom a whore. And they’re the ones with the legitimate pedigree—that makes us the mutts. Is that really how you want us to be thought of? Labeled as less worthy? The Camden bastards? Is that what you want? Because we don’t.”
“They seem like nice people, Conor. Maybe it wouldn’t play out that way,” Kinsey persisted. “And even if you and Declan and Liam don’t want anything to do with the Camdens, that doesn’t mean that I can’t have anything to do with them.”
“It’s opening a can of worms, Kinsey. A huge can of worms. And I’m afraid it wouldn’t have whatever happy ending you’re hoping for. We’re the living proof that this guy was an adulterer—how well can that go over with people who want to believe the best of him?”
“But maybe no matter how it came to be, they might want to know that they have three half brothers and a half sister out in the world. The Camdens are all about family. Maybe their grandmother might like to know she has four more grandchildren...”
“Or not,” Conor said intractably. “Can’t you date or something instead? Think about building a family of your own? Something else?”
“Connecting with other brothers and sisters, our grandmother, isn’t a replacement for marriage and kids. I still want that, too. But I also want the Camdens. A grandmother. Cousins. Siblings.”
“You have brothers,” he said as if she’d forgotten.
“I haven’t been in a room with you or Declan in three years, Conor. It’s been closer to four for Liam.”
“Liam is on an elite team—”
“I know,” Kinsey said, cutting off one brother’s defense of the other. “I understand. But you have to understand where I’m coming from, too—”
“I do,” he said with some resignation, as if he’d been trying not to admit it. “It’s not just what you had to do without our help with Mom and Hugh. Now they’re gone. And if you get a flat tire you can’t call one of your big brothers to fix it.”
“I can change a flat tire and I have road service if my car breaks down, but yes! With you guys doing what you do, I sort of have family in name only—”
“Yeah, I know that’s true,” he conceded. “I know that’s it for you—day in, day out, on your own, nobody to turn to, nobody around to blow off steam to, to ask for help or an opinion or to go to dinner or a movie, no family for holidays or birthdays. Nobody to come if you end up in an emergency room. None of us for anything... Believe me, we hate that.”
“But hating it doesn’t change it. And maybe being part of the Camden family could...” Kinsey said.
Conor grimaced. “Really think about it before you reach out to them, will you? Declan and I will be in the states shortly—plan for that instead. Look forward to that for now. Maybe the three of us can even have Christmas together this year. Liam is out of reach for the time being, but when we have contact again, I’ll talk to him about putting in for leave. Maybe we could all meet at the farm, really talk this through while we pack things up there so you don’t have to do that on your own, too.”
That was so appealing—Christmas back on the farm, all four of them together...
But how many times had she hung her hopes on promises like that and had those promises broken? And even if the promises were kept, it only meant a brief taste of family before it ended and she was on her own once more.
She’d come to accept that that was the way it was with Conor, Declan and Liam, that it wasn’t ever going to be any different. Her brothers were career military. They went where they were ordered to go. And none of them was likely to come out of the service until they were retirees like the colonel. Her brothers would always be far, far away.
But the Camdens—who were also family—weren’t so distant, if only she could get them to open the door to let her in.
“Say you’ll wait at least until the first of the year before you do anything,” Conor prodded when she didn’t respond to his Christmas proposal.
“I can’t,” she said honestly.
A nurse appeared in the screen behind Conor just then to tell him something Kinsey couldn’t hear.
When the nurse left, Conor said to Kinsey, “I have to go. Declan is in some pain and I want to monitor what they’re giving him for it.”
“Sure. Good. Tell him I’m thinking about him and I love him.”
“I will. We love you, too, you know?”
“I know,” Kinsey said. “Love you, too.”
“Think Christmas in Northbridge like when we were kids. And don’t do anything rash.”
Kinsey only nodded at that before they said goodbye.
Then she gave a little prayer of thanks for Declan having come through the surgery and not losing his leg before she went to take a shower.
But even as she took off her pajamas and got under the spray of warm water, her conversation with Conor weighed on her.
What if he was right and the Camdens knew there was another branch on the family tree but didn’t want to acknowledge them?
If that was the case then none of them were likely to look kindly on her forcing the issue.
And even if they had no idea that Mitchum had been a philanderer with a second family, it certainly couldn’t come as good news now. Plus yes, it was possible that there wouldn’t be any love lost for that second family when they did find out.
But the Camdens were her flesh and blood—it always came down to that for Kinsey. And she just couldn’t let go of that now that she knew it. She just couldn’t let go of the hope that they might open a door for her to become one of them.
She recognized that a part of her hope for that might be coming from grief over losing the mother she’d loved dearly and been very close to. But that loss had also opened her eyes to the fact that she didn’t have anyone else left, either.
Being completely overwhelmed with caring for her adoptive father and then her mother for the last two and a half years had made it impossible not to neglect her other relationships.
Friends had found mates and she’d missed meeting those new people in their lives, missed their engagement parties, their bridal showers, their bachelorette parties, their weddings. They’d had babies and she’d missed those showers, too, and then the births, and even a first birthday celebration. Her friends had become enmeshed in their own lives, and Kinsey just hadn’t been able to keep up. So those friendships had gone by the wayside and left no meaningful place for her in any of them.
And now there was the potential to have sisters and brothers, a grandmother, nearby. And that had become important to her.
Not that she didn’t want to find a man and have a family of her own because she did, she thought as she finished her shower and began to dry her hair. The hardest thing she’d ever done was saying no to Trevor’s proposal. But it had been the difficulty she’d had rejecting Duncan after Trevor that had told her that she needed to conquer her loneliness before she ventured into any other romantic relationships. She didn’t want to end up with a man she didn’t really love just because she was afraid of being alone.
She opted to leave her hair down again today and dressed in a pair of jeans that she knew fit her to perfection and two layers of T-shirts—a tight yellow scoop-neck over a white tank top. Glancing in the mirror, she realized that once again, she had dressed to impress not the colonel, but Sutter.
There was no denying that he was a hunk and a half. That he was sexy as all get-out and so handsome any and every woman would take a second look and go slightly slack jawed.
But he was wrong for her. As wrong for her as Trevor had been. And yet here she was, here she had been since she’d met him, thinking about him. Factoring him into her choice of hairstyles and clothes again today despite having told herself she wasn’t going to do that again.
Loneliness was coloring her thoughts, her leanings. If not for that she was certain that the simple fact that Sutter was a career marine would have been enough for her to put him out of her mind.
But she didn’t seem able to do that. Instead, she was filled with eagerness to see him again, even though it wasn’t something she should be feeling. Something she doubted she’d be feeling at all if her life was fuller.
So it was better to focus on the Camdens, on the possibility of connecting with them.
And if—hopefully—that went well and she suddenly found herself a part of something bigger, then she could look for a mate of her own and trust that she was choosing wisely.
* * *
“With a little patience and a little effort, Colonel, you’ll have a fine dog in Jack. He’s just a pup—keep that in mind,” Todd Runyun said.
Todd had been working for Pets for Vets since leaving the marines four years ago. Kinsey had met him through her brother Liam, who had done two tours with him. An injury during their last deployment had caused Todd chronic back problems. ffWhen those problems flared he called Kinsey for physical therapy that she’d provided gratis. Returning the favor, he’d come to the Knightlingers’ house after his workday was over to teach Sutter, the colonel and Kinsey what to do with the rambunctious Jack.
Todd had brought his own dog Reggie, a former bomb-sniffing German shepherd he’d adopted when Reggie was retired from service. It had become clear during the two hours he’d been there that the colonel preferred Reggie to Jack and that was only confirmed when the colonel said, “How about you take Jack with you and leave me Reggie?”
Todd laughed. “Give young Jack here a chance—he’s a new recruit who needs to be whipped into shape like all new recruits.”
Then Todd wrapped up the training session with assignments as Jack tried to enlist Reggie into play, front paws outstretched, hind end in the air, tail wagging, at the ready for mischief while Reggie sat regally beside his master, pretending the puppy wasn’t there.
“Jack is a good pup, he’ll make a good dog,” the trainer concluded.
The colonel huffed under her breath as if she’d have to see it to believe it.
What Kinsey could see was that the elderly woman was tiring, and since their lessons were over she thanked Todd for everything and suggested she get the colonel settled for the night.
As Kinsey and the colonel left, she heard Sutter asking about the Pets for Vets organization itself, lamenting that he hadn’t known about the group when he had been looking for a dog for the colonel.
“Good man,” the colonel said once they were in her room, referring to Todd.
“He is.”
“Boyfriend?”
Not only didn’t Kinsey mind answering most personal questions, she was glad to have any show of interest from this particular patient. The colonel wasn’t one to make polite chitchat. If she was asking, it was because she wanted to know more about Kinsey, which was a sign that the colonel was warming to her.
“No, he’s only a friend,” she said, thinking as she did how true that was and wondering why, in comparison to Sutter, Todd’s good looks had no impact on her whatsoever. He was an attractive guy, after all—tall, blond, Nordic-looking. But nothing about him had ever inspired in her what she was struggling with over the colonel’s son.
“Todd is actually one of my brother’s friends,” she said, shying away from analyzing that phenomenon. Instead she forced herself to concentrate on the colonel and went on to explain how Todd knew Liam.
That led to the colonel’s asking about all three of her brothers and their military careers as Kinsey prepared the older woman for bed.
The fact that Kinsey had such close ties to the military in her brothers and her late stepfather—who had just retired from the marines when he’d met her mother—went a long way toward establishing greater rapport with the colonel, and by the time Kinsey was finished and the colonel was situated with a book and the remote control for her television, the atmosphere between them was considerably friendlier.
Friendly enough for the colonel to confide on the sly, “You know, I like a little brandy before bed...”
“I can’t call your doctor for permission for that now, but I’ll check with him first thing in the morning to make sure it won’t interfere with any of your meds. If we get the go-ahead, I’m fine with that. Even though you seem to sleep without it, I’ll tell him you need a little help and that should do the trick,” Kinsey offered.
For the first time she saw a small smile cross the older woman’s lips, apparently appreciating Kinsey’s willingness to conspire with her. “You do that,” the colonel said with the arch of one eyebrow.
Then, as Kinsey headed for the door after making sure the older woman didn’t need anything else, the colonel said, “Glad your other brother made it through his surgery this morning.”
“Thanks. Me, too. See you tomorrow.”
Apparently Sutter had found quite a bit to talk to Todd about because he was just closing the front door as Kinsey came from the colonel’s room. He had Jack slung under his good arm.
“Jack wanted to go home with Reggie?” Kinsey guessed as Sutter bent over to set the dog on the floor now that the opportunity to make a run for it was taken away.
“Yes. And I thought Todd might be tired of this puppy pestering his dog. I think there’s some hero worship going on there,” Sutter said. “Maybe Reggie can be his role model and Jack will work at improving himself to impress him.”
“Looked more to me like Jack was trying to corrupt Reggie, but let’s think positive,” Kinsey said.
“The colonel’s down for the count?”
“She’s in bed but not asleep if you want to say good-night, then we can do your physical therapy since we didn’t get to it earlier.”
“Yeah, we can’t skip that,” Sutter agreed with more enthusiasm than the prospect usually brought on in most of her patients. Not that that was a surprise to her—recovering meant he’d be able to return to combat, and her experience with her brothers had taught her that that was all the motivation a marine needed. “Meet you in the living room.”
Jack followed Kinsey while Sutter went to his mother’s bedroom. Once in the living room the puppy promptly leaped onto the sofa.
“Todd says you’re not supposed to do that unless you’re invited,” she whispered.
Jack wagged his tail and stayed put.
“Come on, get down,” she said before she recalled that she was to use one-word commands, and repeated only, “Down!”
Jack still didn’t budge so she picked him up and set him on the floor while saying, “Down!” again and then adding, “I bought you a reprieve from going back to the breeder, you’d better use it wisely.”
Jack wagged his tail again and she took that as encouragement. Until he jumped on the sofa again.
“Jack, down!” came Sutter’s deep voice from behind Kinsey as he joined them.
This time the puppy actually got off the couch.
When Sutter didn’t respond to that Kinsey whispered a reminder to him. “Praise...”
“Good boy!” Sutter said while Kinsey leaned over to pet the pup, too.
Then Sutter asked, “Shirt on or off?”
Oh, off, please!
He was wearing a pair of loose-fitting workout pants and a short-sleeved crew-necked gray T-shirt that could have been painted on him. It had been a terrible distraction to Kinsey all day and evening but since it didn’t create much of a barrier now it wasn’t really necessary for it to come off. Despite her every inclination to have him remove it.
Reminding herself that she wasn’t supposed to notice things like those incredible shoulders and that mile-wide chest and those muscular pecs, she resisted the urge to have the shirt disappear, and said, “I think we can work with the shirt on. Just take off the sling.” Then forcing herself into work mode, she said, “How’s everything feeling today?”
“The incision feels better with the stitches out. The shoulder and arm? Doesn’t seem possible for such a small thing but I can feel it all the way to my neck when I squeeze the ball.”
All the way to that neck that was thick but not too thick.
“But you’re able to squeeze the ball,” she pointed out. She’d watched him do it and—on top of everything else—realized that he had great hands, too. Big and strong and capable, with long fingers and thick wrists that led up to impressive forearms and those biceps...
Oh, those biceps...
Kinsey mentally took herself to task and again yanked her attention back. “Being able to squeeze a ball might seem like a small thing but it isn’t.”
And she needed to stop thinking about him squeezing more than the ball, squeezing parts of her...
Stop it right now!
“Why don’t you sit down?” she said then, deciding she needed to do her job and get out of there.
He did as he was told, sitting on the coffee table in front of the sofa where Kinsey could go to work.
“Todd says there are a lot of organizations out there for vets,” Sutter said as she did an initial warm-up of his arm and shoulder. “He works for Pets for Vets, but volunteers for a couple of others and has used the services of one or two more. Apparently getting back into civilian life can have complications for servicemen who decide not to be career military—I never really thought about it since I grew up surrounded by people who were either military-for-life or civilian employees of the military. I guess I just didn’t think about anything in between.”
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