Holiday Baby
Jenna Mindel
She’s got a Christmas secret…But is he ready for fatherhood in Maple Springs?When Cat Zelinsky returns to her hometown, she doesn’t expect to bump into Simon Roberts. The moment he sees her newborn daughter—and his own brown eyes looking back at him—Simon learns the secret Cat’s been keeping. He’s a daddy. And this Christmas, the globe-trotting bachelor might just discover that a loving family is exactly what he needs.
She’s got a Christmas secret...
But is he ready for fatherhood in Maple Springs?
When Cat Zelinsky returns to her hometown, she doesn’t expect to bump into Simon Roberts. The moment he sees her newborn daughter—and his own brown eyes looking back at him—Simon learns the secret Cat’s been keeping. He’s a daddy. And this Christmas, the globe-trotting bachelor might just discover that a loving family is exactly what he needs.
JENNA MINDEL lives in northwest Michigan with her husband and their three dogs. A 2006 Romance Writers of America RITA® Award finalist, Jenna has answered her heart’s call to write inspirational romances set near the Great Lakes.
Also By Jenna Mindel (#u46d3a03f-8def-50dd-bca7-dfedbe839696)
Maple Springs
Falling for the Mom-to-Be
A Soldier’s Valentine
A Temporary Courtship
An Unexpected Family
Holiday Baby
Big Sky Centennial
His Montana Homecoming
Mending Fences
Season of Dreams
Courting Hope
Season of Redemption
The Deputy’s New Family
Discover more at millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
Holiday Baby
Jenna Mindel
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
ISBN: 978-1-474-08641-7
HOLIDAY BABY
© 2018 Jenna Mindel
Published in Great Britain 2018
by Mills & Boon, an imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF
All rights reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. This edition is published by arrangement with Harlequin Books S.A.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, locations and incidents are purely fictional and bear no relationship to any real life individuals, living or dead, or to any actual places, business establishments, locations, events or incidents. Any resemblance is entirely coincidental.
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www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
“Can I hold her?”
Simon’s voice was whisper soft.
Cat wanted to refuse. He was leaving after Christmas. But maybe because he was leaving, what harm could there be in granting this small request?
As he held the baby, she watched the man melt before her very eyes.
Simon touched Opal’s nose. “She’s a beauty, yes?”
Cat clenched her jaw. The sight nearly undid her. “Yes.”
He looked at her hard. “Cat, I have no idea what to do.”
“You’re holding her just fine.”
“That’s not what I mean.” He looked as if he’d been torn in two.
“What do you mean?” she whispered.
Simon’s gaze bore into hers, searching.
Simon didn’t hand her over. “Come with me.”
Cat could refuse, but they’d have to finish this conversation eventually. Before he left, anyway. She owed him that much.
Dear Reader (#u46d3a03f-8def-50dd-bca7-dfedbe839696),
Thank you so much for reading my last book in the Maple Springs series. I hope you’ve enjoyed Cat and Simon’s journey to self-forgiveness, peace and finally love.
This was my most difficult book to bring together. For quite some time, I struggled with Cat’s character. I didn’t understand the depths of her pain until I researched online stories of people who’d caused an accidental death. I was deeply moved and I hope I’ve touched this subject with compassion. There is no pat answer to soothe such grief, but I do believe in a big God with the power to heal. If we let Him.
As I wrap up my visits with the Zelinsky family during my favorite time of the year, my prayer for this Christmas season is that we’d draw closer to God with grateful hearts that are full of His love for others.
My warmest wishes to you for a very Merry Christmas and joyful New Year.
Jenna
I love to hear from readers. Please visit my website at www.jennamindel.com (http://www.jennamindel.com) or follow me on www.Facebook. com/authorjennamindel (https://www.facebook.com/authorjennamindel/) or drop me a note c/o Love Inspired Books, 195 Broadway, 24th floor, New York, NY 10007.
In whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace.
—Ephesians 1:7
A huge thank-you to Matt and Courtney Font for their insight into emergency room protocol. And to Joan Marshall for sharing a mother’s perspective on going to the ER. Your information was incredibly helpful!
Contents
Cover (#u24bf8354-126a-5e01-9908-5959b9bc7495)
Back Cover Text (#uc3e5daf6-abb7-57e8-8563-34e0be0ecad7)
About the Author (#u2ce962a1-690d-55d3-b04f-1cad41c5931b)
Booklist (#u22d91c4d-47eb-5c27-8e0c-62f59dd620b2)
Title Page (#u1f6c0a2e-c073-5b2b-9a19-93d3f8684555)
Copyright (#u67b14ca9-8e61-563e-a692-503ba51b96bb)
Introduction (#u493c8eb4-5f91-510d-b849-9f1eb0ff8f24)
Dear Reader (#uf34f28fa-591b-5265-8e40-ce0327f84d38)
Bible Verse (#uafc3d5c2-c2a7-548e-9747-d97f8614f56c)
Dedication (#u188cc9a7-83a0-5971-b84b-9b824376f132)
Chapter One (#uad64dcb1-fb22-5e95-9df7-3214d8059ded)
Chapter Two (#u694883ca-6694-5226-9e8b-4857ba8a4bed)
Chapter Three (#u010ac86d-5104-51ed-964a-1ff44e102819)
Chapter Four (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fifteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)
Extract (#litres_trial_promo)
About the Publisher (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter One (#u46d3a03f-8def-50dd-bca7-dfedbe839696)
Home.
Cat Zelinsky hated coming home.
It wasn’t the town. She loved Maple Springs, Michigan. It wasn’t her family either; they were great. It was the memories her hometown held. Bad memories of a child who had drowned while in her care when she was a teen. The images haunted her still, maybe now more than ever.
Northern Michigan was one of the most beautiful places even if it held reminders of the ugliest time in her life. It was also a great place to raise a child. She’d never expected to return home with a baby of her own in tow. Glancing in the rearview mirror, she smiled at her nine-week-old daughter bundled in her car seat. “Almost there, Opal.”
Midway through her maternity leave, Cat had given notice as a photojournalist for a travel magazine. She’d explored fascinating places all over the world in order to write enticing articles that encouraged the next vacation or bucket-list destination. Not anymore. Those endless, exciting travel days were over.
It had been a long road trip from New York. Cat used to drive it in a day, but with a two-month-old, she’d stopped overnight in Ohio and several times in between to feed or change or simply walk with Opal when she fussed.
“Thanksgiving is pretty special at the Zelinsky house. You’ll see.” Cat snickered when she realized how much she talked to her baby. She’d started the habit when she found out she was pregnant. After years of counseling, it amazed her how therapeutic simply sharing her thoughts with an infant could be.
Rounding Maple Bay, Cat caught the gorgeous November view that pierced her heart with the warm sense of coming home—followed by the icy reminder of why she’d stayed away except for short visits.
The trees and ground were bare. No snow had yet fallen even though it was plenty cold. The late-afternoon sun peeked out from gray clouds, casting a rosy glow over the landscape, making it look like a painting she might see in a museum. The play of sunlight was fleeting, and in minutes the starkly beautiful vision was gone.
So many things changed in mere moments. Far too many things. Regret didn’t help, and neither did self-loathing, but Cat steeped in both. If only she could do things over. If only...
God, help me face this.
Why should He? She didn’t deserve God’s help.
Cat might have been raised in a Christian home, but she’d been running from God for as long as she could remember. Once she’d realized she was pregnant, she’d asked for protection over her baby. Opal had been born a week late and healthy, but fear that God might still punish her for yet another sin remained a constant companion.
Entering town, Cat craned her neck to look through the naked trees lining Main Street. Her brother Matthew lived only a couple of blocks off Main with his wife, but Cat wasn’t sure exactly where. She spotted her oldest brother Zach’s blown-glass shop to the left and a couple of short blocks later, on the right, was the diner her brother Cam ran with his wife. Even Darren had recently married at the end of the summer, but Cat had been too close to her delivery date to attend. All four of her older brothers were now settled down in this resort town. While marriage certainly wasn’t in her own plans, Cat hoped she could settle down here too, and that meant finding a job.
By the time she pulled into her parents’ driveway, Opal had fallen asleep. Cat took a deep breath before getting out of the car. The last time she’d been home was for Memorial Day weekend. It was then that her family found out about her pregnancy. It had been a strained visit, filled with things she’d regretted. Things said.
Her sister Monica ran down the stone walkway, followed by their mom. Their father brought up the rear at a much more sedate pace, his brow furrowed.
Reluctantly, Cat got out. She fought the urge to jump back in the car and drive away, but there was no place to go. She’d really let her father down this time. Swallowing against the queasiness that stole away everything she’d practiced saying on the way here, Cat took a step forward.
“Wow, look at you! You’re a mom.” Monica sounded amazed.
“Yeah, look at me.” Cat had her doubts about that too. Could she even be a good mom?
She’d never wanted kids because she knew the risks. Cat had not only experienced loss, she’d caused it. Losing a child of her own would be unbearable. Avoiding motherhood altogether seemed safer, and yet she’d let this happen. She had one of her own. All the responsibility, all the danger...and all the humiliation of knowing she’d disappointed her family with her choices. It didn’t matter that she was a grown woman of thirty-one—coming home as an unwed mother stung hard.
Monica peeked into the back seat. “Oh, she’s beautiful!”
She faced her father. “Hi, Daddy.”
“Catherine.” He opened his arms.
“I’m so sorry.” She walked into them, needing her father’s embrace like never before.
She hadn’t been sure how he’d welcome her, considering the way they’d left things between them in May. Cat and her father had argued about her decision to raise the child alone, without trying to find Opal’s father. Even though her father’s embrace felt like a balm, she knew that conversation was bound to resurface, and Cat’s opinion hadn’t changed.
She’d known Simon Roberts all of four adrenaline-charged days. She didn’t believe he was the type who’d want to know they’d made a baby. He was a respected gemologist who traveled all over the world hunting gems. For all she knew, Opal might not be his first, and Cat wasn’t about to line up for child support.
Her father tightened his embrace. “God can turn our wrongs into very good things. The best things, if we let Him.”
She nearly lost it at the thickness in his voice. She wanted to believe that but knew from experience that some things were too terrible to ever be good.
* * *
Simon Roberts slipped into a warm jacket, turned off the volume to his phone before pocketing it and checked his watch. He had plenty of time to arrive at church on foot before services. He’d attended the small congregation for a couple of months now and he regretted that he would be leaving it after Christmas.
He’d traveled all over the world and had been exposed to practically every sort of religion out there, yet sleepy Maple Springs, Michigan, was where he’d come to know God in a very real sense. It wasn’t exactly religion he’d found, although he now attended church regularly. This was something more personal than a list of rules or traditions. It was like nothing he’d ever experienced before.
Trusting God—trusting anyone at all—was new to him.
Over the course of his forty-two years, he’d learned that trusting people led to inevitable betrayal and he was better off keeping to himself. Last year, he suspected that his employer of over twenty years had hired thugs to steal raw opals from him in an attempt to avoid paying him.
After that escape, Simon thought he wanted something else out of life. That was why he’d decided to give settling down a try. Living in a small town was something he’d never experienced before either, and after six months, he’d had enough of the mundane boredom.
He’d picked Maple Springs to set up his jewelry business simply because of Cat Zelinsky. She’d described her hometown as some kind of paradise. He’d given it his best shot, but this paradise smothered him with well-meaning folks pulling at him to be part of the community. Simon had never connected well with people and Maple Springs was all about making connections.
Some tricks an old dog struggled to relearn, and trust was one of them. Managing the retail side of a jewelry business was another. Time to cut his losses and move on, back to what he did best—finding gems for wealthy clients.
The community here had welcomed him and his business, but they’d solicited his help with community events and donations. Especially Cat’s sister-in-law Ginger. As part of the local chamber of commerce, she’d badgered him to join. He’d given that a go too, attending one of the networking nights, which felt like he’d been dumped into a lake filled with social piranhas. He missed the anonymity that came with living in a big city where no one expected anything out of him.
He’d met Ginger’s husband, one of Cat’s brothers, at such a gathering. Zach Zelinsky was retired military and a fellow artisan and shop owner who also held disdain for social events.
Simon hadn’t properly considered that by moving here he’d meet members of Cat’s family. He’d sold an engagement ring to one of her brothers and met one of her sisters when she’d barged into his shop, offering to design his website.
Seeing her family everywhere he went just emphasized the disturbing fact that he couldn’t seem to forget Cat no matter how hard he tried. Catherine Zelinsky had been on his last gem hunt for Welo opals in order to write about it for a travel magazine. In spite of the danger, she’d loved every minute and told him so when he’d put her on a plane out of there. He’d read her tame article on Ethiopian opals, alongside a bit about vacationing in Kenya.
Perhaps he should have called her, but a mad dash through the highlands of Ethiopia wasn’t exactly a firm foundation for a lasting relationship. Not that he understood relationships. He didn’t, but it still felt as if they had unfinished business between them. He should have called when he’d moved to Maple Springs, but coward that he was, he didn’t follow through.
Part of him wanted to see her again and part of him didn’t. She’d touched something deep inside that he’d long ago buried. He’d cast aside need for anyone in his life years ago, when his mother had kicked him out when he was a teenager. He didn’t want to need anyone. Need led to pain and bitter disappointment. Any thoughts of a happily-ever-after with Cat Zelinsky were moot. She’d prove no different than anyone else. Eventually.
Still, Cat might visit her parents with the holidays coming, and then what? If she spotted his Roberts Jewelry sign, would she come in or pass right by?
Simon blew out his breath. Nearly a year since they’d met and yet the woman still invaded his thoughts.
He stepped into cold November sunshine and shivered. He’d spent much of his life searching out gems in warmer climates when he wasn’t working on jewelry in New York or London. This kind of cold weather wasn’t something he was used to and he’d been told this frosty spell was nothing special. Even so, he forced himself to walk the short way from his tidy rental house.
Stepping inside the warm church, he was faced with equally warm smiles from fellow parishioners. Simon nodded and shook a few offered hands but otherwise moved on. He spotted Zach Zelinsky coming toward him and waved.
Zach stalled him by offering a handshake. “Nice morning.”
“Bit chilly.” Simon slowly drew back his hand when he saw her.
Zach chuckled at his reaction. “This is my sister Catherine. We call her Cat.”
She looked softer than he had remembered. Prettier even, with a light dash of cosmetics. He couldn’t take his eyes off her.
Cat’s blue eyes widened when she recognized him, as well. Her mouth opened and closed before she finally whispered, “How?”
“I moved here.”
That clearly shocked her. “Here, to Maple Springs?”
Zach looked confused. “You two know each other?”
“Oh, we’ve met.” The sharp bite in Cat’s voice sounded bitter, as if she regretted what had passed between them.
He didn’t regret a moment with her.
“We met last December, when she wrote an article about Welo opals. I showed her the mines.”
Silence.
Zach looked from Cat to him and then back again, his eyes narrowing. “Opals, huh?”
Simon watched Cat’s face pale. Tension crackled in the air and he couldn’t quite grasp the reason for it.
“Here you go, Cat. I think she needs changing.” Zach’s wife appeared from out of nowhere and handed Cat a pink bundle.
“Thanks.” Cat shifted the blanket, revealing a baby.
Why was Cat holding a baby?
Simon stared at the bundle, feeling like he’d fallen into a deep mining hole. He looked at Cat before glancing back at the bundle, his innards roiling. Then he glanced at his friend, noticed Zach’s balled fists and broke out in a sweat. “What’s this about?”
Zach stood rigid, looking every inch the army captain ready to flog him within an inch of his life. He looked back at his sister. “Maybe Cat will finally tell us.”
Her white face flushed red.
Simon had no words. Could it be...?
Ginger pulled on her husband’s arm. “Come on, Zach. Let them handle this.”
“Handle what?” Simon asked, feeling as if that black mining hole was closing in on him.
“Go, Zach. Please, just go.” Cat’s voice was firm, pleading.
People were beginning to take note of their exchange.
“Fine, but this isn’t over.” Zach gave him a pointed glare before walking away.
Simon focused on the pink bundle. It moved and he nearly lost his breakfast when he spotted brown eyes like his own peep out from under a frilly knit cap.
“Is...is it mine?” Deep down, he knew it was but hoped for some other explanation.
Cat did not look happy. Not at all. “It is a girl. Your daughter, Opal.”
Simon backed up a few steps. His ears rang as he stared at a perfectly formed little face. The heat of the building he’d welcomed only a moment ago suffocated him now.
Cat waited for him to say something, anything, but he simply stared.
“She needs changing.” Cat shook her head and left.
Helpless, Simon watched her go. He’d always been a careful man, but they’d been under stress and...
They’d made a child.
The reality of what they’d done sank in and it wasn’t pleasant. Why hadn’t she told him?
He had to get out of there. He could not step into that sanctuary and sit like nothing had happened.
He bolted out the front door and walked blindly until he finally reached a small park that overlooked the brilliant blue waters of Maple Bay. Gulping fresh, cold air, Simon ran his hand through his hair.
He was a father.
“Forgive me, Lord,” he whispered. “I didn’t know. She never said...”
Why hadn’t she called him? Sure, he wasn’t cut out for fatherhood—he’d had no example to follow—yet he deserved to know that he had a child.
A daughter who’d need her father.
Simon rubbed his forehead. God knew how messed up Simon had been without one. He also knew how Simon had messed up his brother and sister by trying to step in and be one for them.
His stomach turned. He was leaving at the end of the year. He’d already severed his leases for the house and shop—
Opal.
The image of that little face with big brown eyes flashed through his thoughts. Cat had named their daughter Opal. She was so small and dainty. Helpless. He didn’t know what to do with a baby, let alone dealing with Cat.
But the real question was, did he want to stay and find out?
* * *
Cat remained in the small room with several rocking chairs for nursing moms. On the other side of the room, two women chatted happily about their babies, but Cat didn’t join in. Her thoughts twisted in every direction.
The only reason she’d come to her brother’s church was because she knew fewer people at his congregation versus the church where her parents went. She couldn’t face scrutiny from all those people who’d known her since childhood as she stood in the same building with the family members whose lives she destroyed. They’d raise their eyebrows at her having a baby and rightly so.
Simon was here.
Cat tried to make sense of him moving to Maple Springs. It didn’t make sense. He was a modern-day Indiana Jones—he should be off somewhere having another death-defying adventure. At least he’d made it safely out of Africa and he looked well. In fact, he cleaned up really well and she hated herself for noticing.
Had he given up gem hunting to finally settle down? Her heart beat a little faster.
“You okay?” Ginger stepped into the nursery.
Zach’s wife had a magnetic, sunny nature. In the short time she’d been home, Cat witnessed how good Ginger was with her brother. He was not only happy, but seemed at peace.
Cat wouldn’t mind if some of that peace rubbed off on her. She shifted Opal. “As well as can be expected, I guess. How’s Zach?”
“Oh, he’s fuming.” Ginger bit her lip, but laughter shone from her eyes. “I’m sure he’ll give Simon an earful the next time he sees him. So, like, is he Opal’s father?”
“Yes.” Cat couldn’t see the humor in the situation. “Wait, Simon’s not in church?”
“Nope, he left.”
Cat had never expected to see him again, let alone here in Maple Springs, in a church of all places, but knowing he’d left after their brief confrontation didn’t sit well. Not at all.
Glancing at a sleeping Opal, Cat gritted her teeth. He’d left her yet again. So similar to the way he’d brushed her off the morning after they’d stayed in that hut, as if what they’d shared had meant nothing. Evidently, Opal was nothing to him, as well.
Ginger glanced at the other two women, still talking. “He’s been coming to church for a couple of months now. Zach invited him. He owns the new jewelry shop in town and makes some gorgeous stuff. Darren bought Bree’s engagement ring there.”
“I saw it.” It was beautiful, a diamond resting in swirls of white gold.
Cat had interviewed Simon last year, yet she remembered that he’d apprenticed under a master bench jeweler in London before becoming a certified gemologist who roamed the world seeking out precious gems. Opening his own jewelry shop might make sense, given his talents and training, but why here?
It wasn’t surprising that Simon and her brother were friends. They were both shop owners. Both artisans. Simon had put down roots in her hometown of all places. He knew members of her family, yet it appeared that he’d never admitted to knowing her.
Ginger picked at the edge of the baby blanket. “He’s a nice guy, Cat. Too bad he’s closing up shop and leaving.”
“What?” Her stomach tipped and rolled.
Ginger shrugged. “No one knows why. His store seemed to be doing well, but he’s announced that he’s closing after the holidays.”
Cat might not describe Simon as nice. He was mysterious and guarded. He wouldn’t talk about himself and she’d had to dig hard to get any information about his background. He’d been a wealth of information on opals, though he hadn’t wanted his name mentioned in the article—only the company for which he worked. He’d said anonymity worked in his favor when buying gems. She’d sent the final draft of her article to his employer and even then no word had come from Simon. Maybe he hadn’t even seen it. Or cared to read it.
Ginger gave her a pointed look. “I think he’s lonely.”
“Simon is one of those men who prefers his own company.” Certainly he’d preferred it to hers. But then he’d moved to her hometown, befriended her brother and yet never once tried to contact her. What did it all mean? Was she part of the reason he’d come here, or was it all a complete coincidence? Was she just assuming he’d been thinking about her because she’d been unable to stop thinking about him?
When she’d first met him, introduced by her guide, she’d found him incredibly attractive with his scruffy hair and beard. He had a slight English accent that could melt the hardest of hearts.
Cat’s heart had been far from hard, especially when Simon had promised information for an article that was sure to wow her editor. And it did. The article ran a few months ago, right alongside her main piece about Kenya. Those were good days and that was a trip of a lifetime. One she’d probably never be able to take again.
“Cat?”
“What?” She opened her eyes. When had she closed them? She looked down at Opal. The baby slept undisturbed.
Ginger smiled. “I thought I’d lost you there.”
“Almost. Tell Zach there’s no need to get crazy or anything.” Cat stopped, not sure how to explain. She wasn’t proud of the choices she’d made that had led to her pregnancy, but she couldn’t claim it was Simon’s fault. It had been a mutual decision, made when emotions were high and they hadn’t been thinking about consequences.
She hadn’t written a word in that article about being followed to the point that they’d had to run for fear of real harm. That wouldn’t be good for a travel piece. But it had made for a thrilling adventure—one that had left her head spinning, and her good sense tumbling by the wayside.
“What happened? I mean, you know, if you care to share.”
The other two women in the room glanced their way as they left and headed back to church. Cat didn’t want to go to church. She’d rather hide out here awhile longer. She glanced at her sister-in-law, who was waiting for her to answer, eyes wide.
“I went to Kenya for a travel piece and saw this gorgeous opal in a Nairobi market. It came from the north in Ethiopia. I thought I should check out the opal trade there and my editor agreed. So I flew into the capital city of Addis Ababa and that’s where I met Simon, a real live gem hunter. He was able to take me to one of the opal mines.”
“Go on.”
Cat sat forward. “It’s unbelievable how precarious it is. The mines are holes in the sides of sheer mountains. The miners are local folks, and many used to be farmers.”
Ginger’s eyes were still wide. “Weren’t you afraid? All by yourself like that?”
“No.” Cat had loved her job, filled with adventurous travel that had kept her far from home and her past. Now it was over. She couldn’t leave Opal with just anyone and that had brought her back to Maple Springs and her family.
Cat shrugged. “I always had a reputable guide, so I felt safe. Simon served as my guide to the mines and he has a solid reputation in the industry. One evening, after he’d made a large purchase of raw opals, we were followed. Those men didn’t look like they’d play nice either, and the next thing I knew, we were running. We finally lost them, but it was raining so hard we took shelter in an abandoned hut for the night.”
Ginger absorbed the tale. “Did those men who were chasing you ever get the opals?”
Cat shrugged. “I don’t know. The next day, Simon had a local pilot take me back to the capital.”
“And you never saw him again?”
“Not till today.”
“Wow.” Ginger looked thoughtful.
“Yeah.” Cat glanced at the door when she heard a soft knock.
Simon entered, his close-cut hair tousled in the front as if he’d tried to pull it all out. “Cat, we need to have a talk.”
Her stomach tipped at the venom in his voice. “I suppose we do.”
Ginger stood, giving Simon a pointed look as if warning him to play nice. “I’ll check back before church lets out.”
Simon held the door for Ginger and then closed it behind her.
He stood slightly taller than average and was slender with a few streaks of silver gleaming in his dark hair. He sat in the seat that Ginger had vacated.
He took a deep breath and let it back out, a cautious expression spread across his face. “You’re sure it was me?”
Cat snorted. “Yeah, I’m sure.”
“Okay, okay.” He raised his hands before rubbing them against the tops of his thighs, clearly nervous. “Have you come home for a bit, then?”
She wasn’t giving anything away, even though his nervousness surprised her. He’d shown no fear when they’d been on the run from those men. “I heard that you’re leaving.”
He leaned back in the chair. “After Christmas, yes.”
“Why?”
He shrugged. “Living here wasn’t working for me and I’d like to get back to the hunt.”
Cat nodded. It was what she’d known all along. A man like Simon would never settle down.
He took a deep breath. “Look, I don’t know how to be a good father.”
“And I know how to be a mom?”
His eyes narrowed. “You appear to know what you’re doing and you’ve a good family here.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You have a solid support system. I will support you too, you know, financially.”
Cat sighed. So, they were only a financial obligation to him. “I’m not looking for you to do anything.”
Simon shot to his feet and ran his hand through his hair. “I won’t abandon my own kid.”
He’d abandoned her—setting her on that plane as if he couldn’t wait to be rid of her despite the night they’d spent together. She’d thought they’d shared something special, but the morning after proved it obviously hadn’t meant anything to him—just as their daughter didn’t seem to mean anything to him now...other than money he needed to pay.
She didn’t want him complicating things for her or Opal as some absentee parent whose only connection to them was child support. Or worse, popping in and out of their lives. A person couldn’t parent halfway and Cat wasn’t into taking his money unless Simon showed that he wanted to be a real dad.
“Can I hold her?” His voice was whisper-soft.
Cat wanted to refuse. He was leaving in a month’s time. Why bother pretending to care if he wasn’t going to make any commitment to stick around? And yet because he was leaving, what harm could there be in granting this small request?
With a sigh, she got up and walked toward him and settled Opal in his arms. She continued to support the baby from underneath and, being this close, she caught the light scent of Simon’s spicy cologne. “Cradle her so you don’t drop her. Okay, that’s it.”
“I’ve held a baby before.” He awkwardly adjusted his arms.
“Yeah? When?”
A dark shadow crossed his face. “A long, long time ago.”
“Support her neck.” Cat finally relinquished her hold and stepped back, curious. “What baby did you hold?”
“My little sister and brother.” Simon cradled their daughter and his face softened.
“Ah, so you do have family.” He’d refused to answer that question before.
“If you can call them that, yes.” Simon didn’t elaborate and concentrated on Opal’s face.
Cat watched the man melt before her very eyes. The sight nearly undid her.
He looked back up at her. “Cat, I have no idea what to do.”
“You’re holding her just fine.”
“That’s not what I mean.” He looked as if he’d been torn in two.
“What do you mean?” she whispered.
Simon’s gaze bore into hers, searching.
A different woman stepped into the room with a crying infant and her eyes widened when she spotted Simon.
“You’d better go.” Cat reached for Opal.
Simon didn’t hand her over. “Come with me.”
Her stomach flipped again, but Cat killed the butterflies swirling there. “Where?”
“My house isn’t far.” He waited for her to decide.
Cat could refuse, but they’d have to finish this conversation eventually. Before he left, anyway. She supposed she owed him that much.
Glancing at the woman waiting for Simon to leave so she could feed her baby, Cat quickly grabbed her diaper bag and followed him out.
Chapter Two (#u46d3a03f-8def-50dd-bca7-dfedbe839696)
Simon held open the door to his rental house for Cat and the baby. She stepped inside and set Opal, bundled inside a car seat, down in a puddle of sun shining on the hardwood floor. She took off the little fleece blanket that covered the baby and looked around.
“Would you care for tea?” Simon walked past her into the kitchen.
Cat shook her head. “Thank you, but no. I shouldn’t stay long.”
He didn’t know why not. He’d faced her lion of a brother in the sanctuary on their way out the door and had told him that Cat was coming home with him so they could figure out a few things. Simon didn’t know where to start, so perhaps a tour might break the tension. “Let me show you around. It’s not much, but there are two bedrooms.”
Room enough for Opal.
What was he thinking? He couldn’t care for an infant. One glance at the protective way Cat checked on the baby, and Simon had his doubts about her ever letting the child out of her sight, much less leaving the baby alone with him.
His baby—whom he never would have known about if he hadn’t seen her in church today.
Why hadn’t she told him?
Cat followed him in icy silence. His place might be small, but it was tidy with a nice-sized wood-burning fireplace in the corner and big windows and a view of Maple Bay. The short hall led to two bedrooms across from each other and a full bath at the end. His room was sparsely furnished with only a bed and nightstand. He’d never felt the need to own more than the essentials.
“There’s no pictures or anything. Have you packed things up already?” Cat kept looking around as if she expected more.
“No, this is it.” He’d never owned artwork and he certainly didn’t have family portraits to hang. He didn’t remember his mother taking pictures. But then, she’d never spend money on a camera. Not when drugs had been more important.
Back in the living room, Cat sat on the tan couch. His furnishings might be well made, but he got the feeling they were lacking under her critical gaze. “How long have you been here?” she asked.
He sat in the only other piece of furniture in the room, a handcrafted rocking chair with a curved high back. “I moved here the end of May.”
“Why?”
Simon stopped rocking and looked at her. “I guess I wanted a break. The way you described Maple Springs, I thought it’d be the perfect place to design and sell jewelry on a smaller scale.”
“Isn’t it?”
He shrugged. “It is, but I’m done. I want to get back to what I do best.”
“Are you selling the store?”
“I have a lease. It doesn’t end until May, but the owner has agreed to let me break it early. I’ll liquidate inventory and then move on.” That plan didn’t feel quite right anymore.
Cat didn’t look comfortable, considering the way she perched on the edge of the couch.
“Relax, Cat, we’ll work this out.” He had no idea what he was talking about, but equally confusing was her anxiety. She had nothing to fear from him.
If anyone should be scared, it was him. For the first time in his life, he’d fathered a child. He wasn’t sure how that would change his life but knew it would.
She noticed the Bible on top of his journal and ran her fingers over the top. “And this? I didn’t think you were religious before—though I guess we never actually discussed it.”
“True. I wasn’t interested in faith when we met. But since I’ve been here, I’ve found God. I surrendered my life to the Lord in that community church where your brothers attend.”
“So, you know Zach pretty well?”
Simon wasn’t sure about that, but he’d felt a certain kinship with the man. “Well enough, I suppose.”
Opal fussed and Cat stood. “He’s not happy about this, you know.”
“I can’t say I blame him.” Simon stood too. “Might I have another go at holding her?”
Cat’s pretty blue eyes clouded over. They were the color of star sapphires he’d found in Sri Lanka. Finally, she nodded, picked up the baby and then settled her in his arms as she had before.
Opal quieted, her eyes wide as she gazed up at him.
That baby gaze hit him in the midsection. He ran his finger down the baby’s cheek, knowing he couldn’t abandon her.
Simon didn’t know much about babies, but Opal struck him as a beautiful one. “You’re a pretty miss, aren’t you?”
“She favors you, I think.” Cat looked as if she hadn’t meant to say that.
“No, I’d say she’s pretty like her mom.” Simon stared at Cat, drinking in the sight of her. In all his imaginings of what he’d say if he saw her again, he’d never expected this. “I don’t have a clue where to begin.”
Cat forced a smile. “I know.”
Opal fussed before letting out a howl that made Simon wince.
Cat gave an awkward laugh. “I’ve learned to interpret that cry. I was hoping to get home first, but apparently that’s not going to happen. Do you mind if I use your, uh, bedroom to feed her?”
Simon felt his face flush. “By all means.”
Watching her walk away, he clenched his jaw, remembering the last time she’d walked away, after the intimate night they shouldn’t have shared. Why hadn’t Cat taken— He halted that rabbit trail. Opal was as much his responsibility, maybe even more so. Cat had been cold and scared, thanks to the rain and the men they’d had to flee. She’d trusted him to keep her safe. Too bad he hadn’t kept her safe from him.
He stepped into the kitchen and filled the teakettle with fresh water before placing it over a high heat. Rubbing the back of his neck, he considered all the things that went into caring for a baby. A monumental amount of things. He wasn’t ready for that.
He prayed for direction but couldn’t grasp that settling of his spirit. The peace he’d recently realized now eluded him once again. Opal was a game changer and he had no idea of the rules or even how to play.
By the time he’d fully steeped his tea bag, Cat came down the hall, carrying a sleeping baby.
“Well, I’d better get going.” Cat could not look more beautiful. Her dark blond waves framed her face and wide blue eyes. And his child in her arms just made the picture prettier. He still had so many questions for Cat—about Opal, and about everything that had happened in the past year. They hadn’t scratched the surface of anything.
“Why didn’t you contact me about Opal? I know I’m not the easiest person to reach, but you could have sent a message to me through my employer.”
She settled the sleeping baby back in the car seat and wouldn’t look at him. “I don’t know, Simon. I...”
“What?” He prodded.
Her gaze met his and he was stunned by the stark emotions he found there. “I didn’t really know you.” Then she looked away. “I figured you’d rather not know.”
So she’d called the shots, without giving him a chance to decide what he wanted. An inadequate answer on every level, especially since it was sheer chance that he’d discovered the truth. Had she come home after the New Year, he’d have been gone without a peep that he’d even been in Maple Springs.
“You figured wrong.”
Her blue eyes widened. “Can we talk some other time? I’m really tired.”
For the first time, he noticed the faint smudges under her eyes and the fight went out of him. “Another time, then. I think we should exchange numbers, though, just in case.”
Cat nodded and gave him her number.
He entered the information in his phone and then gave her his business card. “That’s got the shop hours on it. I’m closed tomorrow. I close Sundays and Mondays.”
She slipped the card into the diaper bag but didn’t say anything.
This was all wrong, but he didn’t know how to make it right. Cat did look weary and he didn’t want to be the source of more worry. “Thank you.”
She paused before leaving, her brow furrowed. “For what?”
He took a deep breath and calmed down. “For letting me hold her.”
Her eyes filled with tears. “Yeah. Sure.”
He didn’t know if he should try to comfort her or simply let her go. This was all new to him. He’d never been close to a woman before. He’d never wanted more than a temporary or casual relationship. He had to admit that he’d given Cat no indication that he’d care to know about Opal. He’d known there was a chance that their actions could have had consequences, but he’d made no effort to check in with her afterward. Part of him wished he didn’t know, since ignorance was bliss and knowing was...
Relationships had always ended, but having a daughter wouldn’t. Opal was his and would always be his. The question was, what would he be to her?
He took a step forward. “Need help with the seat?”
“I’ve got it. No worries.” Cat waved him away. She looked plenty worried to him, as if she carried the weight of the world in her arms instead of a wee one.
He watched as she backed up her car and drove away. As he stepped inside his house, it felt far too empty. The hollow sensation in the pit of his belly was unwelcome, as well. He’d lived alone for so long, coming and going as he pleased, he’d never wanted any other way. He’d tried something different by moving to Maple Springs but resisted the community that tried to embrace him. He’d never allowed himself to truly belong.
Now he belonged to someone named Opal. He was her father.
Fathers were supposed to be there for their kids, open to all kinds of disappointments and hurts along the way. Simon had experienced God’s love in a tangible way he couldn’t begin to explain and was still trying to figure out.
God would not want him to simply walk away, but really, the responsibility was daunting. Could he become a good father by starting out with a young one? Only God knew.
* * *
Cat entered her parents’ home and leaned against the door after she closed it. Opal still slept in her car seat. Cat wouldn’t mind a little sleep too. Forever came to mind, but she was no storybook princess and Simon was no prince ready to kiss her back to life. In fact, he had a nice escape route planned. Again.
Simon.
It hurt that he’d lived in her hometown for months, knew her brothers and yet hadn’t made one move to contact her. Zach hadn’t even known that they knew each other.
“Cat?” Her mom’s voice pierced the fog of her thoughts. “You okay, honey?”
She shook her head, horrified at the tears rolling down her cheeks.
Her mom didn’t hesitate to wrap her arms around her. “Tell me what happened.”
Cat shuddered with a shoulder-shaking sob.
“Andy, come get the baby out of the doorway.” Her mom led her into the living room.
“What’s wrong with her?” Cat heard her father’s whisper.
Then she heard Zach’s booming voice. “Is that Cat? Is she crying? I’ll kill him!”
“Zach, settle down!” her mother warned and then turned to Cat. “What happened? Is this about Simon? Zach told me. He’s Opal’s father, isn’t he?”
Cat nodded. No point in denying it.
“I knew it! That slimy—” Zach’s voice startled Opal awake, so he continued his rant in a whisper. “All this time and he never said a word about you—”
“Zach! That’s enough.” Their mom’s tone broached no argument and her brother zipped it.
Cat’s father picked up Opal and walked with her, gently shushing the now-crying babe.
Cat pulled away from her mom. She hated to admit that seeing Simon hurt more than she’d ever expected. “Simon was fine. I’m just tired and my hormones are out of whack.”
Zach took a step back as if she’d admitted to having the plague or worse.
Her mom winked. “Come upstairs. You should sleep when you can or you’ll go crazy.”
Maybe she’d already gone mad. She thought she could do this on her own, but one look at Simon holding their daughter and she wasn’t so sure.
It seemed like another lifetime when Simon had wrapped his arms around her, making her feel priceless, like some rare gem he’d searched for his whole life. He’d kissed her that way too, but it had been because of their flight in the night. It hadn’t been real; otherwise he would have tried to see her again. He would have at least admitted to her family that he’d met her.
She followed her mom, who’d taken Opal, and headed up the stairs. Once in her old room, Cat sat on the bed and watched as her mom laid Opal in the old crib they’d hauled down from the attic.
“Make sure she’s on her back.” Her voice sounded too shrill.
“I know, Cat. It’s okay. You said Simon was fine with all this?” Her mom’s voice was whisper-soft as she wrapped the baby in a swaddling blanket.
“Not quite.” He’d looked like she’d put him inside a snow globe and shaken hard.
“Then how was he?” Her mom’s shrewd gaze locked onto hers.
“I didn’t think I’d ever see him again.” It was all Cat could muster.
Her mom nodded. Like so many times growing up when Cat hadn’t given up the whole story, her mom simply waited. And like always, Cat crumbled under that steady gaze. “He’s leaving after the holidays. But he said he’d give financial support.”
“That’s good.”
“Is it?” Cat couldn’t get the image of him holding Opal out of her mind. He’d been captivated, as if he couldn’t believe such a treasure existed.
Her mom’s gaze narrowed. “The last time you were home, you were adamant about raising Opal on your own. You refused to name the father, let alone contact him.”
“I know.” The last time she’d been home, Simon had been on his way to moving here. Crazy. She’d been so sure of herself then. Cat didn’t know what she wanted now, after seeing him.
Her mom brushed Cat’s hair back as if she were still a child. “Sleep now. Things will look better after you wake up.”
No, they wouldn’t. They’d be the very same.
“Don’t worry about dinner. I’ll make sure you get a plate.” Her mother kissed her forehead.
Cat nodded.
At the door, her mother turned. “Why don’t you invite Simon to join us for Thanksgiving?”
Not a good idea. “I don’t know his plans.”
The sudden thought that he might be seeing someone seared her belly and turned it sour. But surely he wouldn’t leave if that was true. And anyway, Ginger would have said something.
Her mom smiled. “Just ask.”
“I don’t know.” Cat lay back on her bed and stared at the ceiling.
“Cat, if Simon wants to be supportive, let him be more than a monthly check.”
Did he really want to be part of Opal’s life—part of her life? Maybe everything he’d done and said today had just been the result of surprise. He might feel differently in the morning. It wouldn’t be the first time.
Leaving Simon in the dark about Opal might not have been fair, but if he’d cared about her at all, he would have contacted her. She would have told him about the baby if he had.
There was no way to rewrite the past. She’d have to decide how to handle things going forward. Having him around her whole family was bound to be awkward, but maybe her mom was right. If Simon wanted to be part of Opal’s life, it had to start now, not years later. That wouldn’t be fair to Opal.
She glanced at the baby lying peacefully in her crib, asleep once again. Her heart twisted at the sweetness of her daughter’s face. She reached for her phone and took a quick photo. “You deserve the best, baby. I hope I can give you that.”
Every child deserved to know their father. Now that Simon knew, and while he was still here in Maple Springs, she owed him the chance to be part of Opal’s life. That meant being involved with the Zelinsky family, as well. Simon knew Zach, he might as well get to know the rest of them.
* * *
The next day, Simon watched for Cat. She’d called and asked if they could go for a drive to talk and he’d agreed. When she pulled in, he was already waiting outside and slipped into the passenger seat. “Hello.”
“Good morning.” Cat looked pretty with her blond hair mostly pulled back with some of it loose.
He glanced in the back seat at Opal and smiled. “Good morning, Princess.”
Cat stared at him as if he’d lost his mind.
“What?” he asked.
“Nothing.”
“Well, where to?” Simon liked the idea of talking while driving, although he’d rather be the one behind the wheel.
“I need to pick up a few things for Opal in the next town over. Do you mind going with me?”
“They carry good stuff?” Simon asked.
“Yes. Traverse City has more stores, but that’s two hours away.”
“We don’t need to go that far.”
He’d been thinking a lot about this situation, coming up with nothing new. All he knew was that it wasn’t right to abandon his own child. Paying child support was part of being a father, but would it be enough?
They slipped into silence while Cat drove out of town. Even the baby remained quiet.
“Do you have plans for Thanksgiving?” Cat’s voice sounded strained.
“Nothing special. Why?”
“My mother wants you to come to our house for the day.” Cat didn’t look over at him as she rounded the bay.
Simon fought his instinct to refuse outright and stalled. “What do you want?”
“I want you to come. I’d like you to get to know my family.”
If the rest of Cat’s family reacted as Zach had, he’d rather face a firing line. Still, perhaps that was what he deserved. His actions had consequences. Opal being one of them. Time to take responsibility, even as he searched for a way out. “I don’t want to intrude.”
“You wouldn’t be. They’re nice people, Simon.”
“I’m sure they are—”
“If you don’t have other plans, then what is it?” Cat glanced at him.
He shrugged. “I’m not used to family gatherings.”
Cat softened. A little. “What about your family? You mentioned having a brother and sister.”
He might as well let her know where he came from. “My brother’s in jail for assault the last time I checked and I haven’t spoken to my sister in years. Both are much younger than me.”
“And your parents?” Cat squeaked out.
“My mom died a few years back and I never knew my father.” He kept his voice even.
Cat watched the road a moment longer before stealing another peek at him. “I’m sorry.”
He didn’t want her sympathy.
She kept going, trying to make conversation. “So, your mother never remarried?”
He laughed and it came out as a harsh-sounding bark. “She never married in the first place. I didn’t know my father because I don’t know who that man might be. I don’t think my mother knew either. My siblings are pretty much in the same boat. Only, they know their father. But he’s never wanted anything to do with either of them.”
“Oh.” Cat looked truly sorry.
“I vowed never to follow those footsteps and yet here I am.”
Cat winced. “Yes, here we are.”
They’d messed up.
They arrived at the store. Cat pulled into the parking lot but hesitated about getting out. She turned to face him. “Look, I’m sorry this happened.”
He didn’t like the repentant look on her face.
He’d never meant to slam her like this was all her fault. He reached for the bit of her hair that brushed her shoulders, feeling the silkiness of it between his fingers. “I’m not.”
Her eyes widened.
He couldn’t believe he’d just said that, but oddly he meant it. He realized that seeing her was better than not. Even though she came with serious baggage that had the same brown eyes as him. “We’ll figure it out.”
She gave him a hint of a smile. “You keep saying that.”
“We don’t have much of a choice, now do we?”
She looked away, clearly disappointed. “No, I suppose not.”
He couldn’t expect to chase away her fears when he had so many of his own. But he’d try. He had to try.
* * *
Cat’s stomach sank as she got out of the car. She had no right to be disappointed in his answer. Simon was doing his best to deal with their situation. It was not as if he’d had much time to get used to becoming a father. She’d stolen that time from him by not telling him.
He opened the door to the back seat and Opal. “How do I do this?”
She came around and slid the car seat out of its base. “Like that. Super easy. And if you hold her, I’ll get the stroller from the trunk.”
“Stroller?”
“You’ll see.” Cat popped the trunk and withdrew the folded stroller. She then snapped the car seat into place. “I’m not real comfortable setting Opal in a shopping cart. The car seat might not fit right and then what if she fell or something fell on her?”
“I see your point.” Simon tucked the edge of the blanket that had flopped over around their daughter’s shoulders. “Will she be warm enough without a coat?”
The temperatures were still cold, but the sun shone from a cloudless sky. Cat felt her baby’s nice warm cheeks against her cold hands. “The blanket keeps her warm. It’s not far. If you’ll push her, I’ll get us a cart.”
Simon took over stroller duty. He hadn’t shaved and the day-old whiskers roughed his face. He looked like the man she’d met in Africa. Only, he wore jeans and a thick woolen sweater instead of dusty khakis and a sweat-soaked T-shirt.
She looked down at her feet. She didn’t match his smooth style wearing her Goth-style clunky black boots, leggings and a long black sweater. They didn’t match at all, and that was part of the problem. Despite his promises to figure it out, they were not any closer to a plan or solution to the question of “what now?”
When they entered the store, Cat took in the Christmas decorations with a frown. She hadn’t expected Northern Michigan retailers to be in sync with bigger cities. “Thanksgiving’s not even over yet.”
He nodded. “I need to decorate my store. Part of a holiday liquidation plan.”
“I’d like to see it. The engagement ring Darren bought for Bree is gorgeous.” She wanted to see more of his work, especially what he may have done with those raw opals he’d bought while she’d tagged along. He’d said that he’d often been paid with a selection of the gems he’d purchased for his employer.
“Stop by anytime.”
They made their way toward the baby section and she took a deep breath. “Here we go.”
Simon chuckled. “You look like I feel. I have no idea about these things.”
Cat laughed too. “I’m still figuring it out.”
He touched her arm, bringing them to a stop.
Cat looked into his warm brown eyes. “What?”
“I’m sorry you were alone.”
Cat’s belly flipped at the softness of his voice. To keep her thoughts away from what might have been, she tried to focus on the Thanksgiving-themed items shelved in the middle of the wide aisle, but the bagged stuffing and rows of bottled sage spices didn’t stave off the swell of emotions that assaulted her. Regret that he hadn’t been there.
Her voice came out thick when she answered, “I wasn’t alone. My mom was with me when Opal was born.”
He ran his hand through his hair, shorter now and much neater. “I should have been there. I would have been there had I known.”
“Would you really? You didn’t even mention that you’d met me to Zach.”
His face reddened. “We both had chances we let pass by.”
A safe answer that was no answer at all. What might have happened had she called him when she’d found out she was pregnant? She heard Opal gurgle and peeked into the stroller.
Opal cooed again.
A passerby stopped and smiled. “Awww. She’s adorable. Your first?”
Cat nodded.
“Congratulations.”
“Thank you,” she and Simon answered in unison.
She looked at him.
He looked back, a slight smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Come on, we’d better get what you came here for.”
And get out quick.
They moved deeper into the store and Cat glanced at Simon. The entire way, his face looked blank and hard, as if it had been carved out of stone. Maybe he was trying not to think about what might have been, as well. Although, she didn’t quite believe that he wasn’t sorry about this. He wasn’t any more comfortable with the idea of being a parent than she.
We don’t have much of a choice, now do we?
Those words echoed through her thoughts as they shopped, checked out and loaded the purchases into the trunk of her Honda. Cat showed Simon how Opal’s car seat worked, slipping it out of the stroller and back into the base. With the baby safely tucked into the back seat of the car, she showed him how to fold up the stroller.
He looked thoughtful and then took a picture of the car seat with his phone. He’d checked while they were inside, but they didn’t carry the same model at this store. “Next time I’m in Traverse City, perhaps I’ll purchase one of those.”
“What for? You’re leaving.”
His brow furrowed. “Yes, but I’ll be back.”
“What’s that mean?” Was he planning to just pop in and out of Opal’s life? And hers?
“I haven’t figured it out yet.”
Remembering the rough-and-tumble way Simon drove to the opal mines, the thought of him driving with Opal wasn’t welcome. She glanced at the baby. She snoozed peacefully, having fallen asleep while they were checking out.
“What kind of car do you have?” She hadn’t seen it in his driveway. But then, it could have been in the garage.
Simon grinned. “A very stable Jeep Cherokee.”
Cat nodded. “Next time, you drive.”
“So you can see how I do?”
“Yes. Is that so bad? How do I know you won’t forget to drive on the right side of the road?”
He laughed. “No, Cat. It’s not bad. Actually, it’s cute. Now, how about lunch?”
It was noon and Cat was hungry, but sitting across from Simon with so little to say and everything that should be said hanging between them wasn’t exactly a prospect she relished. That comment about him coming back had given her a sense of optimism, but Cat knew better than to hope for impossible things. Coming back didn’t mean staying. “Where do you want to go?”
He pointed at the three chain restaurants lined up across the street. “How about one of those?”
“Sure.” Cat picked the middle restaurant. At least they had decent salads.
It had been so easy interviewing Simon, seeing the mines and the chunks of rock with bits of translucent opal showing through. That had been exciting. Even being chased through the rain had been scary but strangely exhilarating. Shopping for baby items and then catching lunch at a franchise was awkward; the easiness they’d once shared was gone.
Once again, her life had been irrevocably changed because she’d let down her guard. Although she loved Opal with a ferociousness she’d never expected, regret still lingered and fear of the future only grew. She had a dark past that never left her alone, making the thought of raising a baby more than a little daunting.
When they were settled into a booth with Opal next to her, still sleeping in her car seat, Cat quickly scanned the menu and set it down.
“You know what you want?” Simon slowly perused his.
She wanted to be back in New York with its vast selection of places to eat. She wanted to hop a plane to exotic places with her camera and then write about them. She wanted the only responsibility in her life to be handing in a piece on time.
Cat sighed. Those days were gone. “A salad.”
Simon looked at her closely. “You look good, Cat. I hope you don’t think you need to lose weight or anything.”
He had no idea. Her jeans still didn’t fit. “It’s what I want.”
He cocked one eyebrow at her. “Very well.”
“Speaking of eating, are you coming for Thanksgiving or not? I’d like to let my mother know.”
He set down his menu, glanced at Opal, before zeroing back in on her. “What time?”
“Noon, if you’d like to watch the football game. We usually eat between two and three, during halftime.”
“Very well. I’ll be there for the game.” He looked like he’d bit into a sour lemon.
She smiled because the waitress had arrived to take their orders. She had to give Simon credit for agreeing to face her entire family. Hopefully, it’d go well. For all of them.
Chapter Three (#u46d3a03f-8def-50dd-bca7-dfedbe839696)
Thanksgiving Day, after driving ten miles north of town, Simon stared at the Zelinsky home. It was well kept and big. Cat had grown up in a nice place on an inland lake, with a large yard and plenty of trees to climb. She’d had everything a kid could ask for.
He hadn’t talked to Cat for nearly two days. She hadn’t stopped by the shop, but then the past couple of days had been cold and rainy. Not good days to take a little baby out.
He’d called last night to see if there was anything he should bring today, but Cat had told him not a thing. After hanging up, he’d prayed for direction, but Simon still felt adrift. With his troubled family background, how would he be able to relate to the Zelinsky clan? Even he and Cat barely knew each other. What mattered most was Opal’s welfare and that was why he was here. He wanted to see the rest of the family his daughter had been born into. The people who would have a role in raising her.
Simon made his way along the slate stonework walkway up to the front porch. Taking a deep breath, he rang the doorbell and waited.
He heard voices and laughter and then the door was opened by an older woman with classic features and blondish hair, which was pulled back tight. “You must be Simon.”
“I am. Thank you for inviting me.” He offered her his hand and smiled at the warmth shining from the woman’s eyes.
She accepted the handshake. “I’m Helen, Cat’s mom, and she’s right, that’s one great accent you have. Come in, please.” She stepped back to give him room to enter. She was about the same middling height as Cat.
He should have told her that she looked more like a sister, but he couldn’t get past the fact that Cat liked his accent. Having spent his late teens and most of his adult life living in London, he’d picked up a bit of how they spoke.
What else did Cat find agreeable?
“We’ve got the game on in the family room. Are you a fan of football?”
“I enjoy watching it, yes.” Simon grew up watching the Giants, having been born and raised in New York City.
He followed Cat’s mom from the large entrance area into a warm kitchen filled with tempting food aromas and family members huddled around a spread of snacks. The itchy feeling of being the odd man out hit quick and sure. Add that he was Opal’s father, and it made him the proverbial white elephant in the room.
Where was Cat?
“Cat’s feeding Opal. She’ll be down in a moment,” her mother answered as if reading his thoughts. “Simon, this is my husband, Andy.”
Simon stood straighter, but Cat’s father still towered over him. He extended his hand. “Good to meet you, sir.”
Cat’s father looked through him and Simon was certain the man found him lacking in every way possible as he accepted his hand. “Thank you for coming.”
“Your invitation was very kind.” Simon saw where Zach got his bearing. He glanced around the room again, wishing Cat would hurry.
Her mother was now busy in the kitchen with Zach’s wife and a tall blond man he’d met at church—also one of Cat’s brothers.
“We look forward to knowing you better,” Andy said.
Simon merely nodded. Too many layers in that statement to uncover each one now. He felt a strong urge to apologize, but the words evaded him. There wasn’t much that could be said to expunge what had happened between him and Cat.
Fortunately, Cat’s sister Monica scuffled toward him before he made a fool of himself trying to explain the unexplainable to Cat’s father.
“Hey, have you considered my website offer?” She too was quite tall. Cat came from a family of giants. “I can do an online catalog that’ll knock your socks off.”
“I’m closing up shop.”
Monica’s mouth dropped. “You are? Why? I thought you were doing well.”
“Yes, well—”
Cat’s father placed his hand on Simon’s shoulder. “Grab a plate and come watch the game. We’ll talk later.”
Simon didn’t mistake the hard look in Andy’s eyes. Cat’s father reduced him to an awkward teen in a matter of moments. He’d known from the start that coming here wasn’t going to be easy, but he hadn’t expected the tension to be quite this strong.
“Hello, Simon.” Cat breezed into the room, grabbed a carrot from one of the trays and popped it into her mouth.
“Where’s Opal?”
She pointed to the ceiling, still crunching. “Sleeping.”
“What if she wakes up? How will you know?”
“Baby monitor.” Cat pulled out what looked like a white walkie-talkie from the pocket of her long top.
She wore gray leggings with woolen socks. Her hair was up, but some of it fell around her face. He loved her hair like that. He wished they were alone. So many things remained unsettled between them. Unsettled in him.
“Have you met everyone?”
“Just your parents, when I arrived.”
“Grab a pop. That’s my brother Cam in the kitchen with my mom. They pretty much run the show with food prep and the rest of us clean up.”
Cam turned and gave him a nod. His hands were deep in a bowl of something.
Simon remembered that he’d seen Cam at the diner in town, as well as in church. Simon picked up a can of soda from an ice-filled tub and followed Cat down a few steps, where everyone was gathered to watch the game. A couple soft couches and chairs were filled, along with a rocking chair near the fireplace. A couple of Cat’s brothers lounged against large pillows on the floor, leaving only one two-seater couch open.
“Everyone, this is Simon Roberts.”
He nodded as Cat introduced everyone in the room. He’d likely not remember their names, but there was a strong family resemblance. Cat was one of ten kids, with four older brothers and three younger, as well as two younger sisters.
Simon sat next to her on the two-seater, with nothing to say.
Fortunately, he didn’t need to say anything, as Cat kept talking. “My brother Matthew is still on the lakes. He’s an officer on a Great Lakes freighter, but his wife and her two-year-old will join us for dessert later. Greg there is Rose’s son. She married Cam around this time last year.”
The teenager gave him a nod. His mother, a warm smile.
Simon had seen them both at the diner, as well. “You’ve a large family.”
“I do.” Cat leaned back.
Simon also sat back but didn’t relax. The warmth of the fire and conversation surrounded him as he was peppered with well-intentioned questions that he answered the best he could. These people were nice and well-adjusted, a far cry from the world he grew up in. It should have felt comfortable and welcoming—he could tell that was the atmosphere the whole family was trying to create. But instead, it just made him feel out of place.
The desire to bolt overwhelmed him, but the future of one tiny baby kept him seated. Opal slept without a peep from the baby monitor and Cat looked tired. He noticed her eyelids drooping as soon as the football game started.
The desire to make things better for her twisted deep inside, but there wasn’t much he could do. With his arm draped along the back of the loveseat, he whispered, “You can lean into me.”
“No, no. I’m fine.” Cat’s eyes met his.
Could she really lean on him, through all of this? He’d given her no reason to, announcing he was closing up shop and skipping town. Sure, he’d offered financial support but how could he give Cat something to truly lean on?
Looking around, he was tempted to foist his responsibility for Opal on these people. Cat had everything she’d need right here.
He’d never had a normal family life. What made him think he’d do any better for Opal than these people? He couldn’t, so was there any point in trying?
But what of his daughter? Uncles couldn’t take the place of a father and he was her father.
* * *
Cat tried to clear the fog from her brain. She rested against someone warm. Inhaling the subtle, spicy scent, she opened her eyes and blinked.
“You weren’t out long.” Simon’s voice was soft and deep and it rumbled through her. That voice of his was her undoing with its buttery half accent and slight lilt of words.
“Sorry.” She sat up fast and rubbed her cheek, still warm from where she’d leaned into his shoulder. The shirt he wore was soft flannel, yet the man managed to look fashionable even in that.
She heard her sister’s voice through the monitor. If Opal wasn’t awake, she would be soon. “I should check on the baby.”
He nodded.
She escaped, but not before she connected with her father’s concerned gaze. Remembering their argument the last time she was home, she could easily imagine his thoughts. He was thinking she should settle down with Simon because of Opal, but Cat wasn’t making any sudden moves. Not when she knew next to nothing about Simon, and he knew so little about her. Even if she wanted a relationship, would Simon be on board for that? He’d said he’d come back, but would he stick around?
She hurried for the stairs.
“Cat, why didn’t you tell me it was Simon!” Monica hissed as she came down the steps with Opal in her arms. “I have to admit he’s pretty hot for an older guy.”
Cat knew her sister was teasing by the way she smirked. It didn’t matter that Simon was older than Cat by more than a few years— Wait, she didn’t even know his age.
She reached for the baby. “Does she need to be changed?”
“I did it. Don’t try to change the subject. I think Mom’s a little surprised by his age too, and I think Dad’s going to give your man a talking-to.”
Cat felt her stomach drop yet again. Please, not today. “He’s not my man.”
“Give it time.” Monica grinned and carried Opal the rest of the way down the stairs with no moves toward giving her up.
Cat didn’t have time where Simon was concerned. He’d severed his lease on his jewelry store effective the first of the year. Would Opal change his mind? Could Cat? Did she even want to? The idea of his sticking around just because he felt obligated was horrible. She didn’t want him to feel like he was stuck with them—trapped into being part of a family he didn’t want and wouldn’t have chosen.
When Cat returned to the family room, her mother announced that dinner was ready. Her father had hit the pause button on the TV so they wouldn’t miss the rest of the game. He stood and stretched. “Let’s gather in the dining room.”
“Where’s Opal?” Simon asked.
“Monica has her.” Cat caught the quick flash of disappointment in his eyes, causing her stomach to twist.
He was forming an attachment to Opal. But was that good or bad? Even though she didn’t want him feeling trapped, she also didn’t want Simon going back to his old globe-trotting routine. Was there any kind of middle ground? A way he could be part of their lives on a regular basis, without giving up the life that he’d chosen for himself?
Standing in the dining room, Cat watched as her family gathered around the huge table set with Grandma Zelinsky’s fine china and crystal goblets. Covered dishes were strategically placed down the middle, but the luscious aroma of turkey gravy and sage stuffing escaped, making her mouth water. It had been a long time since she’d been home for Thanksgiving. She waited for everyone to slip into their usual seats and a lump caught in her throat. This was home, loud and loving and terribly bittersweet.
“Here, you two sit at this end so we can tuck Opal in her bouncer out of the way of traffic.” As usual, her mom had everything under control, even seating.
Monica handed Cat the baby.
Simon reached to take the elevated bouncy seat from her mom and positioned it between their chairs. He looked it over while she buckled Opal in. “She won’t tip?”
“It’s solid.” Cat looked away so Simon wouldn’t catch her irritation with him questioning her choice. She’d read countless reviews on the item before purchasing it, making sure it was sound and safe for Opal.
“Let’s say grace.” Her father, at the other end, reached out to hold the hands of her mom on one side and Cam on the other.
Cat clenched her teeth as she reached for Simon’s hand.
His thumb brushed over hers, distracting her from the rote prayer she knew by heart. She stared at their clasped hands, remembering the gentle way he’d touched her on their one night together. The way he’d held her. She’d been half-frozen from the cold rain, but his touch had been so warm.
“Amen.” Simon lifted his head.
Had he thought about her at all?
Cat pulled her hand away, grateful for the increased noise of chatter and the clatter of serving dishes being passed. She glanced at Simon and nearly laughed at the shocked look upon his face. “Crazy, I know, but this is home.”
“Worse than chow time at some mining camps I’ve been in.” He accepted the tray of turkey and offered to fill her plate before his. “White or dark?”
“A little of both, please.” Her mother had always made two turkeys so there would be plenty of leftovers. She watched as Simon served her before choosing an ample portion for himself.
“What about Opal, when will she eat solid food?”
Cat’s head spun. Thinking back to when her youngest sister Erin and brother Luke were babies, she couldn’t remember when they started eating solids. “Honestly, I’m not sure.”
Simon stared at her as if she should know these things by heart. “I bought a book.”
“A book?”
“About the steps of childhood development over the first year. I purchased it at the local bookstore a couple of stores down from me.”
Cat stared at him. Why would he do that? Was he thinking about giving more than financial support?
“What?” His dark eyes looked warm and sweet.
Now wasn’t the time to discuss anything in depth, but she had to know. “Why’d you buy that?”
He shrugged. “Honestly, I’m not sure.”
Cat looked away and connected with her father’s piercing gaze.
Dad’s going to give your man a talking-to.
She didn’t want her father or Zach making demands on Simon that they had no right to make. She and Simon were too old for her father to pull out the proverbial shotgun, yet that was exactly what he looked like he might do.
* * *
After dinner and cleanup, Cat’s family gathered in the family room once again for the remainder of the football game. Simon held Opal in the rocking chair near the fireplace, glad for some distance from Cat. The woman’s nearness made his head spin. Not at all a good thing, especially when it made him question everything he’d decided about his future.
He’d put plans in place that were hard to change. Namely, a gem hunt in January for a high-end investor. He couldn’t exactly back out and keep his reputation solid. He needed this for future income. Bottom line, he didn’t want to back out. He loved gem hunting. It was his life—always had been.
He gazed at his daughter’s pretty little face as he cradled her in his arms. Holding her might not have been the best idea. He’d used rocking her as a shield against Cat and her family and all that small talk. He wasn’t part of the jokes they shared as they loaded the fridge with leftovers and the dishwasher with dirty dishes. He didn’t want to be part of them, but using Opal as an excuse for distance had backfired. He’d climbed from one hot pan into another because this baby pulled hard on the heartstrings. This precious little bundle was sinking her sweet little brown-eyed hooks into him fast.
Opal blew bubbles and cooed and kicked her legs. He reached for her hand, amazed at the baby’s grip. “You’re a strong one.”
She gurgled back.
He spotted Cat in the kitchen, talking with one of her sisters-in-law who held a large boy of her own. The child fought to keep his eyes open. Cat’s sisters were busy placing pies on the counter and making coffee.
The Lions were down by seventeen, so the game had lost some of its appeal. Simon glanced around the room. Cat’s younger brothers were sprawled on the floor, sleeping. Even Andy Zelinsky, sitting in a recliner, had closed his eyes. Zach did too, with his wife, Ginger, cuddled into him.
What was he even doing here?
Anger he hadn’t felt in years roared to life. This was what a family was supposed to be, was supposed to have—a warm holiday meal, served with comfortable trust. No drama, no sirens and no TV dinners. The absence of all of this from his own childhood left him with a bitter taste in his mouth that no amount of pie they served could dislodge.
Part of him wanted to make a scene, to vent some of his anger. But that wouldn’t be fair to the people here, who’d been nothing but welcoming. And it wouldn’t be fair to Opal, who deserved exactly this type of wonderful family occasion. Days like this were things he didn’t want Opal to miss.
Would she grow up missing him?
His gut twisted. If he wasn’t careful, he’d miss her.
Simon stopped rocking. Buying that book had only confirmed that he didn’t have what it took to take care of a baby. One day, he might be of more value than financial child support, but that wasn’t now. Cat had a fine support system in her family right here. She wouldn’t be raising Opal alone.
He carefully stood and crossed the expanse of floor toward Cat.
“Want me to take her?” Cat asked.
“Please. It’s late. I’d better get going.” He wanted out.
“But you haven’t had dessert.” Cat’s sister-in-law balanced her boy on her hip.
“Some other time.” Simon couldn’t get out of there fast enough.
Cat’s mom stepped forward and took Opal. “Thank you for coming, Simon. Cat will walk you out.”
Cat looked hesitant but nodded. “Yeah, sure.”
“Thank you for dinner.” He should have said his goodbyes to the rest of the family, to Cat’s father, but they were sleeping.
At the door, Simon silently donned his coat while Cat slipped into hers and then pulled on a pair of boots. She followed him outside.
The air was crisp with an icy bite to it, but Simon breathed deeply, letting his thoughts settle down. The sun had long since set, leaving behind only remnants of light showing from beneath the dark clouds clustered on the horizon.
“I’ll walk you to your car,” Cat offered.
“It’s cold. You needn’t.”
“It’s okay. I wanted to ask you something, anyway.” She looked a little nervous.
That made him want to bolt even faster, but he kept his pace even next to Cat’s. “Something on your mind?”
Cat pulled the collar of her coat closer. “Yes. You don’t have to give me an answer right away, just think about it.”
“What’s that?” They were near his car now.
“What if you kept your shop open?”
“I’m committed in January to an investor to buy rubies and tourmaline in Mozambique. It could very well turn into something long-term.”
Cat took a deep breath and let it out. “What if I managed your shop for you while you were away?”
He looked at her. “Why would you want to?”
“I gave my notice at the magazine before coming home and I need a job. One that’s local.”
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