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The Prodigal's Christmas Reunion
Kathryn Springer


With his entire family depending on him, Lucas Clayton reluctantly comes home just weeks before Christmas.Branded "town troublemaker" as a teen, Lucas left tiny Clayton, Colorado, and vowed never to return. But now he's back—with a child in tow. No one is more stunned than Erin Fields, the hometown sweetheart he left behind. Commitment-shy Lucas is someone's daddy?Before he can convince Erin he's changed, he has to prove it to himself. And to a pint-size cowboy, who needs the Claytons—and the entire town—to make this a very special Christmas.










An adorable preschool-age boy came in the barn.

A bright red snowsuit enveloped his thin frame but instead of a stocking cap, a cowboy hat was perched on his head. A battered black Stetson that looked a lot like the one Lucas used to wear.

He smiled shyly, pressed his cheek against Lucas’s leg and pointed to the foal. “Thatsa baby horse.”

Erin couldn’t help but smile back.

“This is Max,” Lucas said.

“Hey, Max. I’m Erin. It’s nice to meet you. Do you like horses?”

“I like trucks better,” Max declared.

“We’ll have to work on that.” Erin winked at the boy. “So, who does this little cowboy belong to?” she asked Lucas.

“He belongs to me,” Lucas said.



Rocky Mountain Heirs:

When the greatest fortune of all is love.

The Nanny’s Homecoming—Linda Goodnight

July 2011

The Sheriff’s Runaway Bride—Arlene James

August 2011

The Doctor’s Family—Lenora Worth

September 2011

The Cowboy’s Lady—Carolyne Aarsen

October 2011

The Loner’s Thanksgiving Wish—Roxanne Rustand

November 2011

The Prodigal’s Christmas Reunion—Kathryn Springer

December 2011


KATHRYN SPRINGER

is a lifelong Wisconsin resident. Growing up in a “newspaper” family, she spent long hours as a child plunking out stories on her mother’s typewriter and hasn’t stopped writing since! She loves to write inspirational romance because it allows her to combine her faith in God with her love of a happy ending.


Kathryn Springer

The Prodigal’s Christmas Reunion






www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)


Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; You have made my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance.

—Psalms 16:5–6


This book is dedicated to Linda, Arlene, Lenora, Carolyne and Roxanne—an amazing, gifted group of authors it was

a pleasure to work with. Your encouragement, prayers and unfailing patience were a blessing!


Contents

Chapter One (#uaed75fab-dd3f-5503-9f62-c6634f7582bb)

Chapter Two (#ud6977ad2-11b5-5738-a429-7e311707c4a8)

Chapter Three (#u78c871d4-bb9a-5708-adc0-cef8ef1ee0db)

Chapter Four (#uf00ea27c-ba07-52d8-9f38-491c5cbda3a1)

Chapter Five (#u48b1eeaf-0fd3-5da3-a1a0-88c72549b233)

Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Fifteen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Sixteen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Seventeen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Eighteen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Nineteen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Twenty (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Twenty-One (#litres_trial_promo)

Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)

Dear Reader,

Questions for Discussion (#litres_trial_promo)


Chapter One

Lucas Clayton could have driven down the streets of his hometown blindfolded.

The thought was tempting.

Because not even a moonless night and the light snow sifting onto the windshield of his pickup could conceal the silhouettes of the businesses that sagged against each other in a tired line along Railroad Street.

Jones Feed and Supply. The grocery store. The post office.

Each building held more than just sacks of grain or canned goods or stamps. Each one held a memory. Or two.

Or a hundred.

The town of Clayton, Colorado might have been named after one of his dusty ancestors, but Lucas had never taken any pride in that. Growing up, having the last name Clayton had only been one more expectation weighing him down. One more invisible shackle holding him in place.

Lucas had broken free at eighteen and left home with a beat-up canvas duffel bag, a chip on his shoulder as solid as a chunk of rock hewn from the Rockies themselves and a vow never to return.

As he traveled from job to job, eventually landing in Georgia, both the duffel bag and the chip on his shoulder had remained constant companions.

But now, after seven years, he’d broken the vow.

Not that he’d had a choice.

His grandfather, George Clayton Sr., had passed away during the summer, leaving behind a will that had caused new splits in an already fractured family. George’s brother, Samuel, and his offspring had made life unbearable for years, but they stood to inherit everything—if Lucas and his five cousins didn’t satisfy the conditions of the will.

That didn’t surprise him. Leave it to good old Grandpa George to attempt to control people’s lives from the grave—he’d certainly made a habit of it while he’d been alive. As a lawyer, George Clayton had a reputation for being ruthless, manipulative and self-serving. As a grandfather, he hadn’t been a whole lot better.

Lucas still couldn’t believe his cousins had agreed to put their lives on hold and return to Clayton for a whole year. But he was the last one to return.

Lucas hadn’t exactly had a choice about that, either.

A promise made to a dying friend had taken him to places that no sane person would have chosen to go, but loyalty to his sister had brought him back to Clayton.

Cruising through the lone signal light at the intersection, Lucas saw a soft glow in one of the windows farther down the street.

He didn’t even have to read the faded sign above the door to know which one it was.

The Cowboy Café.

Lucas struggled against a memory that fought its way to the surface. And lost.

An image of a girl’s face materialized in front of him, clear as a photograph. A heart-shaped face. Hair that glowed like the embers in a campfire, shades of bronze and copper lit with strands of gold. Wide brown eyes that had a disconcerting tendency to see straight into his soul.

Lucas’s fingers bit into the steering wheel.

He couldn’t think about Erin Fields.

Wouldn’t think about her.

She’d made her choice. Before he’d left, Lucas had asked Erin to go with him but she’d refused, choosing loyalty to her family over her love for him.

Maybe she’d been willing to put her dreams and her future on hold, but Lucas knew he wouldn’t have a future if he stayed in Clayton. The confines of the small town would have served as a mold, shaping him into something—someone—he didn’t want to be.

His father.

Vern Clayton, medical missionary and well-respected pillar of the church and the community, had died in a car accident when Lucas was a teenager, but his mother had insisted he follow in his father’s footsteps by serving God and becoming a doctor.

Instead, Lucas had turned his back on both.

Disappointing people seemed to be his gift.

As if to underscore the point, an image of Erin’s tear-streaked face returned. He could almost feel the touch of her hand on his.

I’ll always love you, Lucas. And I’ll wait for you.

Lucas pushed the memory aside.

He’d be crazy to think Erin had stayed true to the promise she’d made that night. They’d been kids. That kind of vow didn’t stand the test of time.

From his experience, not a whole lot did.

Turning onto a side street, he pulled up to the third house on the left. Completely dark. Lucas hadn’t expected a welcoming committee—especially when he hadn’t told his mother or Mei the exact date of his arrival.

Lucas’s fingers curled around the keys in the ignition, fighting the temptation to shift the truck into Drive and take off into the night. The way he had seven years ago…

A soft rustle came from the backseat.

Twisting around, Lucas summoned what he hoped was a reassuring smile. “It’s okay, Max.”

A pair of hazel eyes blinked at him from the shadows. “Daddy?” came the sleepy response.

Lucas’s throat tightened, preventing him from responding.

Not that he even knew how to respond.

For the past few months, he’d provided the little boy with food and shelter. The basic necessities. What he hadn’t been able to give Max Cahill was the thing he needed the most. His parents.

What were you thinking, Scott?

His former college roommate hadn’t been. That was the problem. Scott’s addictions had led him down a path that had ultimately cost him his life—and if Lucas hadn’t stepped in, the life of an innocent child.

Max lifted his arms toward Lucas and grinned. “We gettin’ out now?”

Lucas shook his head. They’d been on the road for more than forty-eight hours and yet his pint-size passenger, who recently turned four, somehow managed to display a more cheerful disposition than the driver.

“Yup. We’re getting out now.”

“French fries?” Max stifled a yawn even as his eyes brightened with hope.

“I can’t make any promises, buddy.” And there we have it, Lucas thought. Another one of his flaws exposed.

A raw December wind stung Lucas’s face as he hopped out of the truck cab. The crisp temperatures and falling snow felt almost surreal after traipsing through the Florida Everglades, dodging the men who had killed Scott Cahill. Unbuckling the booster seat, he scooped Max into his arms, blankets and all.

The boy burrowed against him and Lucas felt a familiar burst of panic. The one that gripped him whenever Max turned to him for comfort.

Lucas anchored Max against his chest with one arm while fishing for the spare house key his mom always stashed behind the mailbox. Before he had a chance to slide it into the lock, the porch light came on.

He had only a second to react before the front door swung open and a petite, dark haired whirlwind launched herself at him.

“Lucas! You’re home.”

“Home,” came a muffled chirp from inside the cocoon of blankets.

Mei’s astonished gaze dropped to the quilt. Lucas could see the question in his adopted sister’s ebony eyes and knew exactly what she was thinking.

He’d given Jack McCord, his sister’s new love who’d tracked him down in Florida, permission to offer the family an abbreviated version of what he’d gone through to retrieve Max from the thugs who’d snatched him away from his dying father during a drug deal gone bad. But judging from the expression on Mei’s face, they had expected Lucas to return to Clayton alone.

And why wouldn’t they? an inner voice mocked him.

He’d been MIA for years, communicating with his family through emails and the occasional phone call. That way, he stayed in control of the relationships.

It was a little unsettling to admit that maybe, just maybe, he and Grandpa George had something in common other than their DNA.



“Hey, Erin, I’m supposed to let you know that we’re getting a little low on ground beef…”

Erin Fields jumped at the sound of a voice behind her.

She pasted on a smile to cover the guilty look on her face before turning around to face Kylie Jones. Which was a little ridiculous, given the fact that it wasn’t a crime to be caught putting on your coat.

Unless it was the middle of the day.

And your name was Erin Fields.

Kylie zeroed in on the coat clutched in her hands. And then her gaze shifted to the clock on the wall.

“The lunch crowd is thinning out so I thought I’d leave early,” Erin explained.

“You’re leaving. Early.” The waitress repeated, her green eyes widening in disbelief.

Maybe because Erin never left early. As the owner of the café, she was the first one to arrive in the morning and the last one to leave at night.

“Only a few hours.” Erin winced at the defensiveness that crept into her tone.

She never got defensive, either.

Kylie tipped her head. The movement sent a tumble of light brown curls over one shoulder. “Is everything all right?” she asked hesitantly. “You’ve been a little…distracted…lately.”

Lately being the past forty-eight hours, Erin thought. And if pressed, she could take it a step further and pinpoint the exact moment it had started. When she’d overheard a customer casually mention that Lucas Clayton was back in town.

As much as Erin had both dreamed of and dreaded the possibility of that happening, nothing had prepared her for the reality.

Lucas. In Clayton. For a year.

Erin knew all about the conditions of George Sr.’s will.

It had been the talk of the town since July. One by one, the Clayton cousins had returned to their roots—all except Lucas.

Every time the bells above the door of the café jingled, Erin’s nerves would jingle right along with them. It didn’t matter that the logical side of her brain knew he wouldn’t seek her out. When it came to Lucas Clayton, the hopeful side had always prevailed.

Which proved she still hadn’t learned her lesson.

Which, in turn, made her pathetic.

Harboring feelings for a guy who’d claimed to be in love with her—and then left without a backward glance.

Erin was tempted to confide in Kylie, but even now, after all these years, it felt as if she would be breaking a promise. At Lucas’s request they’d kept their high-school romance a secret from friends and family. He’d claimed he didn’t want his reputation to cast a shadow on her and Erin had reluctantly agreed, afraid her mother wouldn’t approve of her dating that “wild Clayton boy.”

Even when the truth about their relationship would have squelched the malicious rumor that Vincent Clayton, Lucas’s cousin, had started about him and Susie Tansley, Lucas had held Erin to that promise. That’s when she’d started to wonder if there was another reason he had insisted on keeping their relationship a secret. A reason that had more to do with his being ashamed of her than some of the things he’d done…

Kylie snapped her fingers two inches from Erin’s nose. “See what I mean? Distracted.”

“I’m fine. Really.” Even as she said the words, Erin wondered who she was trying to convince. Kylie? Or herself? “It’s Diamond I’m worried about. She seemed a little agitated this morning before I left for work, and she’s due to drop her foal any day now. I’d feel better if I checked on her.” It was the truth—and a legitimate reason to escape the memories pressing down on her.

“You’re such a softie.” Kylie chuckled. “You treat those animals of yours like children.”

Erin knew her friend was teasing but the words still stung. She was twenty-five years old. Her friends were either engaged or already married and starting a family, something she’d always dreamed of.

With Lucas.

Stop.

For Kylie’s benefit, Erin mustered a smile. “So, I’ll leave everything in your capable hands for a few hours.”

Kylie reeled her in for a quick hug. “Don’t worry about coming back to close up. I’ll take care of it.”

“We got six hours ’til then.” A gravelly voice snarled from the kitchen. “So how about you take care of the orders piling up in here before you talk about shutting the place down for the night?”

“Be right there, Jerome,” Kylie sang out. Lowering her voice, she winked at Erin over her shoulder. “From the way that man carries on, you’d think he’s the one who signs my paychecks, not you.”

The two women exchanged a grin. Everyone in town knew the old cook’s bark was worse than his bite.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, then.” Erin shrugged on her coat and shook her ponytail free from the sheepskin collar. “And Kylie…thanks.”

“No problem. Zach is meeting me here after he gets off work. He claims he can’t pass up one of Gerald and Jerome’s famous barbecue rib dinners, but I have a hunch he wants to keep an eye on me.” Kylie’s expression clouded. “Now that Lucas is back in town, Zach thinks it’s going to rile up Vincent and the rest of his family even more.”

Erin kept her expression neutral, although her heart plummeted at the mention of Lucas’s name. “Samuel’s side of the family has always enjoyed causing trouble,” she murmured.

“You’re telling me.” Kylie couldn’t suppress a shudder. “I almost married into it. I thank God every day that He saved me from making a huge mistake—and brought Zach into my life.”

So did Erin. Zach Clayton, the second of the cousins to return to Clayton after the reading of the will, treated Kylie the way she deserved to be treated. With love and respect. Unlike Vincent, who Kylie had caught kissing another woman on the day they were supposed to exchange their vows.

“Vincent can put on quite a show.” No matter how many times he’d denied it, Erin had known that Vincent, George Sr.’s nephew, had been behind Susie Tansley’s attempt to destroy Lucas’s already shaky reputation by claiming he was the father of her unborn baby.

Erin hadn’t believed the malicious rumors flying around town about Lucas’s relationship with Susie, but Lisette Clayton did. The fact that his own mother hadn’t believed the truth had finally pushed Lucas over the edge. By the time the truth came out and Susie’s claim had proved to be a lie, the damage had been done.

He’d shown up at Erin’s house a little after midnight with a beat-up duffel bag, eyes dark with pain and a reckless offer that had quickly deteriorated into their first—and last—argument.

In the end, Erin had watched Lucas drive away, praying with all her heart that he would change his mind and stay in Clayton. And stand up to the people who’d spread rumors about him.

She’d watched the brake lights on his truck glow red at the stop sign. Left would take him home. Right would take him out of the city limits. He’d turned right.

Toward his dreams. And away from her.

“…Better get back to work before Jerome fires me.” Kylie’s teasing voice tugged Erin back to the present as she breezed toward the door of the office.

Erin’s heart clenched as she followed Kylie into the dining room and her gaze swept from table to table.

Be strong, she silently lectured herself.

Clayton boasted a population of less than a thousand people. Eventually, she and Lucas were going to come face-to-face.

And when they did, Erin knew exactly what she would do. She would hold her head up high and look him right in the eye. Her polite smile would show Lucas that she was doing all right. She’d moved on, too.

He’d never have to know that he’d taken her heart with him when he left.


Chapter Two

“Easy girl.” Erin ran a soothing hand over the flank of the mare stretched out on the floor of the stall. “Hang in there and you’ll be a momma in no time.”

The horse thrashed weakly in response to the sound of her voice, and Erin felt needle-sharp tears poke at the back of her eyes.

Where was Tweed?

She’d put in an emergency call to the local large animal vet over an hour ago.

Maybe she’d been running away at the time, but Erin was glad she’d left the café early because the moment she’d arrived home from work, she’d known something was wrong. Winston, her corgi, had been standing at the door of the barn instead of ambling down to the mailbox to greet her the way he usually did.

Erin had discovered Diamond lying down in the stall, already in the throes of what looked as if it were going to be a long and difficult labor.

The blue roan was Erin’s first rescue. She’d attended an auction one summer afternoon and spotted the horse tied to the back of a rusty trailer, half-starved and abused. One look into those sorrowful, liquid brown eyes and she couldn’t walk away. No one had bothered to mention the mare was expecting.

Even with a good diet, a warm place to sleep and daily doses of tender loving care, Diamond had been slow to regain her strength. Erin had been afraid all along that the horse wouldn’t be able to handle a difficult birth. She’d shared her concern with Dr. “Tweed” Brighton, who’d promised to help deliver the foal if necessary.

If only she could get in touch with him.

A plaintive whinny split the air and Erin placed a comforting hand on the mare’s belly.

“Not much longer now,” she whispered, hoping it was the truth.

As the minutes ticked by, helplessness and frustration battled for control of Erin’s emotions, swept along on a tide of “what ifs.” What if she’d become a veterinarian instead of taking over the café from her mother? What if she hadn’t chosen duty to her family over her dreams?

Then she would be able to offer something more than simple comfort or encouraging words as Diamond struggled to bring her foal into the world.

A ribbon of wind unfurled through the barn, carrying the sweet scent of pine and new-fallen snow. Erin’s knees went weak with relief when she heard the soft tread of footsteps coming closer.

The stall door slid open behind her.

“Thank goodness you’re here, Tweed,” Erin said without turning around. “She’s in a lot of pain but nothing seems to be happening.”

Instead of a response marked by a crisp British accent, something the veterinarian wore as proudly as he did the tweed cap that had earned him his nickname, there was silence.

Erin shifted her weight and glanced over her shoulder. Her gaze locked on a pair of snow-covered hiking boots and traveled up. Over long legs encased in faded jeans. A flannel lined jacket. Broad shoulders. Sun-streaked blond hair. Chiseled features that formed the perfect setting for a pair of denim-blue eyes.

Lucas Clayton’s eyes.



Lucas blinked several times, but the young woman kneeling in the straw didn’t disappear.

And she looked just as shocked to see him.

The years melted away, burning through the layers of defenses Lucas had built up until all that remained were memories.

Memories of the one person who’d never stopped believing in him at a time in his life when Lucas had stopped believing in everything.

When Tweed had sent him on an emergency call, Lucas had only been given the address—not the name—of the person who needed help with a pregnant mare.

Erin Fields’s unexpected presence not only stirred up emotions Lucas had buried long ago, but also created a few new ones.

The image frozen in his mind had been that of an eighteen-year-old girl. This Erin looked the same…but different.

The knee-length corduroy coat didn’t quite conceal her willowy frame, but the sprinkle of ginger-colored freckles he’d often teased her about had faded. Windswept tendrils of copper hair framed features that had matured from a wholesome prettiness into a delicate, heart-stopping beauty.

He knew Erin hadn’t left Clayton, but she wasn’t supposed to be here. Inside an old barn adjacent to a dilapidated farmhouse a few miles outside of town. They’d both grown up in Clayton—their houses only a few blocks apart.

The mare tossed her head after sensing an unfamiliar presence, reminding Lucas why he was there.

Focus, buddy. In a town the size of Clayton, you knew you would see Erin sooner or later, he told himself.

Later would have been better.

The expression on Erin’s face told him that she felt the same way.

“What are you doing here? Where’s Tweed?”

“He had another call.” Without waiting for an invitation, Lucas stepped into the stall. Kneeling down next to Erin, he caught a whiff of her shampoo, a light floral scent that reminded him of mountain lilies.

A scent that had no business lingering in his memory.

“I don’t understand. Why would Tweed send you?” Erin shifted, putting a few more inches of space between them.

“He hired me.” Lucas ran a hand over the horse’s neck and felt the muscles ripple under the velvety skin.

“Hired…” Her gaze dropped to the medical kit he’d set down in the straw.

Lucas watched the myriad emotions topple like dominoes in a pair of eyes the color of warm gingerbread. Confusion. Disbelief. Denial.

“I’m here to help,” Lucas said curtly. Being this close to Erin had opened a floodgate to his past and it was his way of trying to put a cap on the memories flooding in. “But if you’d rather wait for Tweed—”

“No. I just wasn’t…” Erin averted her gaze. “Go ahead and do whatever you need to do.”

Lucas opened the med kit and began to prep for an exam. “She belongs to you?”

Erin nodded. “I didn’t realize Diamond was pregnant when I rescued her from the auction.”

Diamond. It figured. Only Erin Fields would see potential in an animal as battered and broken as this one. The number of scars crisscrossing the washboard ribs hinted at invisible ones below the surface.

Lucas worked quickly, aware that the woman beside him was watching every movement. He tried to keep his expression neutral, but she must have seen something there. Erin had always been good at reading him. Sometimes too good.

She leaned forward. “How is she?”

“In distress.” Diamond’s ears twitched at the sound of his voice, but she didn’t even bother to lift her head. Lucas silently weighed his options.

“What can I do?”

“Keep her calm.”

Erin had always been good at that, too. How many times had she listened to him as he vented about his mother’s unreasonable expectations for his future plans? Taken his hand to absorb his volatile emotions, her lips moving in a silent prayer on his behalf? Been there for him without asking for anything in return?

Don’t leave like this…

Lucas ruthlessly shook off the memory of the last night they’d spoken. A hundred miles down the road he’d realized that Erin had done the right thing when she’d refused to run away with him. He hadn’t been fit to be a good husband back then.

Any more than he was fit to be a father now.

He turned to reach for a syringe only to find that Erin had anticipated his need. Their fingers brushed together and Lucas couldn’t help but notice she wasn’t wearing a ring. The realization that Erin wasn’t married sent equal measures of relief and terror skittering through him.

“Talk to her.” Lucas’s voice came out sharper than he’d intended. “She’s not going to like this.”

Erin scooted closer to the horse and spoke to her in the same gentle, soothing voice she’d once used on him.

Lucas worked in silence for the next few minutes, administering a sedative to relax the horse while he performed a brief but enlightening internal exam.

He stood up after it was over and tried to ignore the pain that rattled down his spine, a subtle but persistent reminder of a conversation he’d had with a cranky bull the year before.

Erin looked up at him. “The foal is breech, isn’t it?”

Lucas didn’t miss the catch in her voice and he gave a curt nod, mentally bracing himself for the inevitable—telling her there was a good chance she would lose both the mare and the foal.

Lucas took a step toward her, shrinking the space between them. He could see the faint spray of ginger-colored freckles on her nose. The eyelashes spiked with unshed tears.

Something twisted in his gut. His sigh came out in a puff of frost. “Erin—”

“Don’t say it,” she said fiercely.

“You might have to choose,” Lucas pushed.

“All right.” Erin’s chin lifted, warning him that she was willing to push back. “I choose both.”

Lucas stared at her in disbelief. The girl he’d known in high school hadn’t been a fighter. It was one of the things Lucas had accused her of the night he’d asked her to run away with him.

“When it comes right down to it, you’re a coward, Erin. Your problem is that you have all these plans, all these big dreams, but you aren’t willing to fight for them.”

“And your problem is that you want to fight everything and everybody,” Erin had said, her voice cracking under the weight of his accusation. “You think if you leave Clayton, you’ll leave behind your grief and all the regrets over your relationship with your dad—”

“Don’t bring my dad into this.”

“Why not? You do it all the time. Every minute of every day. But if you leave Clayton like this, it’s all going to follow you until you give it to God—”

“Leave Him out of it, too.”

“Oh, Lucas…”

“Lucas?” Erin stood up. The top of her head was level with his shoulder but she didn’t back down. “I’ll help. Just tell me what I need to do.”

“Leave.” He didn’t want her to witness what might happen. Or see him fail.

“Give me something else to do.”

Was that a glimmer of humor in her eyes? Lucas couldn’t be sure but the warmth of it momentarily chased the chill away, if not the doubts.

“Diamond is strong,” Erin whispered. “She’s going to get through this.”

There was a time when Erin had believed the same thing about him.

Before he’d walked away.



Erin tried to keep her thoughts centered on delivering the foal and her eyes off Lucas.

He worked with a calm efficiency that astonished her. As a teenager, Lucas had reminded Erin of a caged mountain lion. Filled with restless energy. Eyes fixed on some point in the horizon that no one else could see.

She didn’t know this man. The one with the patient hands and soothing voice. It had taken Diamond several months to trust Erin enough to accept a treat from her hand, but in the space of five minutes Lucas had gained the mare’s trust.

She still couldn’t believe that he’d gone to college. Become a veterinarian.

Her dream…

“Erin?” Lucas’s voice tugged at her.

She realized he’d caught her staring and blushed. “Sorry. What did you say?”

“The foal turned.” In spite of the temperature outside, beads of sweat dotted Lucas’s forehead. “I think we can let Mom take it from here.”

Five minutes later, Diamond delivered a tiny, jet-black replica of herself.

Erin closed her eyes.

“Thank you, God,” she murmured.

When she opened them again, she found Lucas staring at her, a wry expression on his face.

“Are you going to send Him the bill, too?”

Erin couldn’t prevent a smile. And to her absolute amazement, Lucas smiled back. A faint quirk of his lips that carved out the dimple in his left cheek, a trait passed on from Clayton to Clayton like a family legacy.

Lucas hated it. Erin, however, had referred to it as the “Clayton brand” and teased him about it.

Pressed her lips against it.

Swallowing hard, she turned her attention to Diamond, severing the fragile connection that had sprung up between them. “There’s a bucket of water and a clean towel in the tack room if you want to wash up.”

“Thanks.” The smile had disappeared.

Two polite strangers. That’s what the years of silence had accomplished.

It’s what Lucas had wanted, Erin reminded herself.

Diamond’s soft whicker was a welcome distraction. The mare was nuzzling her newborn foal, who lifted its head in response to the attention.

Caught up in the wonder of the moment, Erin watched the two interact until Lucas returned and began to collect his medical supplies.

“Everything looks good but I’d keep a close eye on her for the next twenty-four hours.” He turned to her, his gaze once again distant. “I’ll give you my cell number in case there’s a problem.”

Erin caught her lower lip between her teeth. She didn’t want his phone number. Didn’t want to see him again and deal with the stampede of emotions those denim-blue eyes triggered.

“That’s not necessary. I’ll call Tweed if I have any questions. He’s treated Diamond since I brought her home.”

“Tweed…” Lucas hesitated. “He’s planning to retire around the first of the year. Until then, he wants to stay in the clinic and limit his practice to pets.”

Erin sucked in a breath, hoping that didn’t mean what she thought it meant.

“I’m taking over the large animal side of his practice.”

That’s what she’d thought it meant.

“You’re staying in Clayton?” Erin tried to keep her voice steady.

“It looks that way. For a year.” Lucas didn’t sound happy about it, either.

So the rumors she’d heard about George Sr.’s will had been true. Until now, she hadn’t quite believed it.

“Yoo-hoo! Is anyone home?” A feminine voice floated through the barn.

“We’re in here,” Lucas called back.

A few seconds later, Mei Clayton appeared in the doorway, holding the hand of an adorable preschool-age boy. A bright red snowsuit enveloped his thin frame but instead of a stocking cap, a cowboy hat was perched on his head. A battered black Stetson that looked a lot like the one Lucas used to wear.

He smiled shyly, pressed his cheek against Mei’s leg and pointed to the foal. “Thatsa baby horse.”

Erin couldn’t help but smile back. “Babysitting today?”

Lucas and Mei exchanged a look that Erin couldn’t decipher.

“This is Max,” Mei said.

“Hey, Max.” Erin experienced the familiar pang that happened whenever a cute little kid came into the café. Someday. “I’m Erin. It’s nice to meet you. Do you like horses?”

“I like trucks better,” Max declared.

Erin winked at Mei. “We’ll have to work on that.”

“What’s up, sis?” Lucas shrugged his coat on. His sister slanted an apologetic look in his direction.

“I know I promised to watch Max this afternoon, but the high-school secretary called and asked if I would be available to attend an emergency parent-teacher conference after school. You didn’t answer your cell so I called Tweed to track you down.”

“That’s okay.” The affectionate smile Lucas gave her told Erin the siblings still shared a close bond. “I’m finished here.”

Max broke away from Mei. And to Erin’s astonishment, he headed straight for Lucas.

Her gaze bounced from Lucas’s sister to the boy, who’d wrapped both arms around Lucas’s knees and was clinging to him like a burr on a wool sock.

Lucas looked so uncomfortable with the attention that Erin had to stifle a smile.

“So, who does this little cowboy belong to?” She directed the question at Mei but it was Lucas who answered.

“He belongs to me.”


Chapter Three

Lucas saw the flash of hurt in Erin’s eyes before she could disguise it.

“I see,” she murmured.

Lucas doubted that. How could she? Even he wasn’t sure how he’d ended up with custody of someone else’s child.

He could almost guess what she was thinking. He was the guy who avoided family obligations like a disease. Sure, he’d been willing to marry Erin, but Lucas had come to realize that the proposal had been offered out of selfishness. He’d claimed he didn’t want to lose her, but what he hadn’t wanted to lose was the sense of peace she had brought to his life.

Which made him that guy.

The guy who had no business taking on the responsibility of a wife. Or a child.

“Oh, before I forget, here’s the Realtor’s number.” Mei fished a business card out of her coat pocket and handed it to him. “I ran into Bev yesterday afternoon and mentioned that you’re anxious to find something.”

Anxious to move out of his childhood home, Lucas thought. The last few days hadn’t been easy. Mei had done her best to ease the tension between him and their mother, but Lisette made no attempt to hide her disappointment in him. Something Lucas should have been used to by now.

Not only did his mother barely interact with Max, she’d refused to care for him when Lucas went out on a call. Mei babysat when she was available, but Lucas knew he couldn’t count on her generosity much longer. When his sister wasn’t substitute teaching at the high school, she was spending time with Jack McCord, the local search-and-rescue worker who had crossed state lines to bring him and Max to safety.

Lucas still couldn’t wrap his mind around that relationship. Mei and Jack, Charley Clayton’s stepson, had been at odds in high school but now they claimed to be in love. There seemed to be a lot of that going around, now that he thought about it.

So he wasn’t going to think about it.

“Thanks, Mei. I’ll try to give her a call after Max goes to bed tonight.”

Max frowned. “Don’t wanna go to bed.”

“You have to learn to spell things,” Mei whispered to Lucas.

“Spell things?”

“You know. B-e-d.” Mei closed one eye in a saucy wink and blew Max a kiss before breezing out the door. “Bye, partner. Bye, Erin.”

“Bye.” Erin’s smile, when aimed at his sister, was relaxed and genuine.

Lucas couldn’t help but feel a little envious.

There’d been a time when they were completely at ease in each other’s company. Now, she could barely look at him.

“I’ll drop a check off tomorrow.” Erin’s gaze drifted to Max again.

“No hurry—” Lucas found himself talking to her back. He took Max by the hand and followed Erin out of the barn. “I’ll swing by in a few days to check on Diamond. Is there someone around here during the day?”

“I’m usually at the café.” Erin veered toward the shoveled pathway leading to the house.

“I know that, but the owners won’t mind if I stop by, right?”

She whirled around and sent a spray of snow over the tops of his boots. “What do you mean, the owners?”

Now it was his turn to be confused. “The people who board Diamond for you.”

“I don’t board her here. I live here.”

Frowning, Lucas peered at the two-story eyesore with the dingy white clapboard siding, crooked shutters and a wraparound porch that sagged like an unbuckled belt around its middle. The small outbuildings and barn were in a similar state of disrepair.

“What happened to your house in town?”

Erin looked away. “I sold it after Mom died.”

Lucas felt his stomach turn inside out. Erin’s mother had battled diabetes for years, but no one had bothered to mention that she’d passed away. When had it happened? And why had Erin stayed in Clayton?

She’d been as anxious as he was to leave their hometown, her goal to become a large animal vet. Lucas’s goal had been to break every household rule his parents established.

Did Erin realize she had been instrumental in his choice of a career? Every retired, broken-down ranch horse within a twenty-five mile radius of Clayton had received her loving attention and he’d been right there beside her, currycomb in hand.

His willingness to work with the animals had caught the attention of the local vet on the ranch he’d worked in Georgia.

“You have a way with these critters, Clayton,” the doc had said. “Ever think of making a living at it?”

Until that moment, Lucas hadn’t. But he’d taken the words to heart—and didn’t mention that his “way with critters” had been encouraged by a slender girl with big brown eyes and a luminous smile.

He pulled his thoughts back in line. Looking back had the power to make a man stumble.

“I’m sorry.” The words sounded inadequate but they were the best Lucas could do.

“So am I,” Erin said softly.

“So you bought a…” Lucas searched for the right word. One that wouldn’t offend her. “A…house…out here.”

A shadow of a smile touched Erin’s lips. She’d read his mind. Again. “I’m planning to fix up the place a little at a time and add a few more stalls so I can rescue more horses like Diamond. I think the place has potential.”

Lucas didn’t have the heart to tell her that she was wrong. The same way she’d been wrong about him.

“I can help. I gottsa hammer,” Max announced.

“Really?” Erin reached out and tapped a finger against the tip of his wind-kissed button nose. “You’ll have to show it to me sometime.”

Max looked troubled and Lucas knew what was coming next.

Sure enough, tears welled up in the hazel eyes. “Hammer’s at home.”

And home, no matter how rough it had been, was a place that existed only in Max’s memory now.

A familiar feeling of helplessness once again threatened to swamp Lucas, reminding him that he was in way over his head. He didn’t know what to do about the fresh pain in Max’s eyes…or the shadows that still lingered in Erin’s from the loss of her mother.

Maybe because he’d never figured out how to deal with his own grief.

Losing his father in the car accident that had also claimed the life of his uncle, George Jr., had changed him. Outwardly, no one could see the damage. On the inside, it was a different story. Like tempered glass, Lucas absorbed the impact of the blow but hadn’t been able to stop the tiny cracks from spreading below the surface. Sometimes he felt as if they’d changed the very structure of his soul.

“Wanna go home,” Max choked out.

“We’re setting up camp together, remember? You’ll have your own room and a shelf full of toys.”

It was bribery, plain and simple. The parenting books would disapprove, but it was the best Lucas could do.

Glancing at Erin, he braced himself for the reproach he probably deserved.

The compassion in the golden-brown eyes rocked him to the core.

“You’re looking for a place of your own?” she ventured.

“Mom isn’t used to little kids in the house anymore.” Especially a little kid who woke up in the night, caught in the throes of a waking nightmare.

“There’s a place just down the road for sale,” Erin said, almost reluctantly. “The couple who lives there wants to relocate to Florida to be closer to their daughter.”

Lucas didn’t bother to tell her that he was interested in a house he could rent, not buy. Buying a house meant putting down roots and he was only in Clayton for a year. He silently corrected himself. Eleven months and three weeks.

“I didn’t notice a For Sale sign on the way here.”

“There isn’t one yet.” Erin pushed her hands into her coat pockets. “I heard it’s going on the market this weekend.”

The only place Lucas remembered seeing was a log cabin set back from the road a ways. Small and cozy and surrounded by a yard large enough to appeal to an active boy.

But way too close to Erin.

Seven years ago she’d been both confidante and conscience. His best friend and his first love.

After the way they’d parted, Lucas wasn’t sure what they were anymore. But there was one thing he did know.

The thought of staying in Clayton for a year wasn’t nearly as terrifying as the thought of being Erin Fields’s closest neighbor.



“How long does it take for a guy to get a cup of coffee around this place?”

Erin’s back teeth ground together.

Vincent Clayton had sauntered in five minutes before closing time, leaving a trail of mud and slush across her freshly mopped floor before taking a seat at the farthest table from the kitchen.

He loved to do that.

Erin found herself wishing that she hadn’t sent Gerald and Jerome Hicks home early. Business had been slow so she’d convinced the two cooks that she could handle any last-minute customers and shooed them out the door.

Help me be patient, Lord. Erin sent up the silent prayer as she made her way to Vincent’s table. He smiled at her, his casual pose as deceptive as that of a rattlesnake coiled up in the sun.

She didn’t trust him for a second. This particular snake was always ready—and willing—to strike.

Erin suppressed a shudder as she filled his coffee cup. “Sorry for the delay,” she said automatically. “I had to put on a fresh pot.”

Instead of looking at the menu, Vincent’s gaze swept around the empty dining room. “I guess it’s just you and me, isn’t it, Red?”

“What would you like?”

The sudden glint in the shifty blue eyes made Erin regret the way she’d worded the question. “Now that’s an interesting question,” he drawled. “Could be that I want the same thing my cousin wants.”

“Leave Zach and Kylie alone,” Erin warned. “They’re happy.”

“Who said I was talking about Zach?”

Erin sensed the rage simmering just below the surface of his smile and knew if she followed it to its source, it would lead her to the one family member who had always been Vincent’s greatest rival.

Lucas.

It was hard to believe the two men were related. They didn’t resemble each other in looks or personality. Whereas Lucas had frequently been blamed for his role in things he’d never even taken part in, his cousin had somehow managed to come out smelling like the proverbial rose.

Even now, Vincent had no qualms about using his father Pauley’s title as part-time mayor to throw his weight around.

“It’s late. What would you like to order?” Erin somehow managed to keep her voice steady.

“I heard he brought a kid back with him. Wonder how long that’ll last?” Vincent leaned back, hooking the heels of his snow-covered boots over the rung of the wooden chair beneath the table.

Erin stiffened. “I imagine it will last awhile. Max is his son.”

“His son?” Vincent hooted. “That kid ain’t got a drop of Clayton blood in his veins. Lucas took him in like a stray pup after the boy’s daddy died.”

Erin fought to hide her reaction.

When Lucas had said that Max belonged to him, Erin had searched for a resemblance between the two, some trait passed on from father to son, but had come to the conclusion that the boy must favor his mother.

Vincent’s claim would explain why Lucas had looked so uncomfortable when Max had clung to him in her barn that day.

Bits and pieces of rumors that Erin had heard over the past few months began to fall into place.

The sudden silences and worried looks she’d seen pass between the Clayton family had led her to believe that Lucas was refusing to come back and fulfill the terms of his grandfather’s will.

Now she wondered if the delay hadn’t had something to do with Max.

“Lucas says he’s going to legally adopt the kid, but that won’t happen,” Vincent went on. “We both know that Lucas was never what you’d call a ‘family man.’”

Erin had had her fill of the man’s poison. “He came back, didn’t he?”

The triumphant look in Vincent’s eyes told her that she’d made a mistake. It didn’t matter if he’d been bluffing or if he had somehow known about her and Lucas all along. She’d stuck up for Lucas—the way she always had. If Vincent’s plan was to force Erin into admitting that her feelings for Lucas hadn’t changed, she’d just delivered the answer. Gift-wrapped and ready to use against her.

“But he won’t stay long.” Vincent shook his head in mock sympathy. “Not for old man Clayton’s money or his land. Lucas ain’t wired that way and everybody with a lick of sense knows it.”

His tone implied that Erin Fields didn’t fall into the “people with a lick of sense” category.

“If you don’t want anything, I’m going to close up for the night.”

Vincent’s hand shot out, his fingers curling around her wrist. “I want what’s mine and Lucas isn’t going to cheat me out of it.”

Erin and Vincent might have played in the same sandbox once upon a time, but that didn’t prevent her knees from locking up in fear as the pressure tightened.

She sucked in a breath. “Let go.”

Vincent released her and sprang to his feet. “Mark my words. A lot can happen in a year.” The gleam in his eyes was more intimidating than the grip of his hand had been. “He won’t stick it out.”

“People change.”

“Some do…and some don’t.” Vincent leaned in close, enveloping her in a cloud of pungent cologne. “If I were you, I wouldn’t be getting any ideas about a happily-ever-after with my cousin. You weren’t enough to make Lucas stay back then, Erin, and you won’t be enough for him now.”

He sauntered to the door and the moment it snapped shut behind him, Erin was there, fumbling with the lock. She squeezed her eyes shut and pressed her forehead against the frosted glass.

Her heart had instantly rejected Vincent’s claim that Lucas planned to leave Max with someone else. Yes, he’d appeared uncomfortable with the way the preschooler had clung to him, but she hadn’t missed Lucas’s awkward but tender attempt to comfort him, either.

No matter what Vincent said, Lucas cared about Max.

But unfortunately, Erin knew what Vincent had said about her was true.

She was still the same woman she’d been seven years ago.

The woman that Lucas had left.


Chapter Four

“We goin’ to Erin’s house?”

In the rearview mirror, Lucas saw Max point out the window. The wide smile on the boy’s face hadn’t been there a few seconds ago.

Max must have met half the population of Clayton since their arrival. The fact that he remembered Erin’s name proved she’d made an impression.

Maybe it hadn’t been such a good idea to bring him along.

An overweight corgi rounded the barn, sounding an alarm as his pickup rolled down the snow-packed driveway.

A moment later, Erin stepped out of the building, her copper hair a bright spot of color against the faded timber siding.

Lucas’s heart stumbled at the sight of her.

There had always been something about Erin Fields. Some elusive quality that went beyond simple chemistry or the way she looked—although she was more beautiful at twenty-five than she’d been at eighteen.

When Lucas returned to Clayton, he knew it would be awkward to see Erin again. Even though they’d parted in anger the night he left, they had a history. Shared memories. The trouble was, Lucas hadn’t been prepared for the emotions tangled inside of those memories.

Erin was a complication he didn’t need. He’d left Clayton once, and after he fulfilled the terms of his grandfather’s will he planned to leave it again.

“Wanna get out, Lucas!” Max tugged on the strap of his booster seat.

“Hold on.” Lucas hopped out of the truck cab and opened the door.

Giggling, Max made a break for it as soon as Lucas unbuckled him. The kid was smart enough to know where to seek sanctuary, too. He made a beeline for Erin, who swung Max up in her arms as if she’d done it a hundred times before and tucked him against the curve of her hip.

“How are you doing today, cowboy?”

“I wanna see the baby horse.” Max pointed to the barn.

“She’s with her momma right now,” Erin said. “And they’re both doing great.”

Lucas figured that last bit was meant for him.

“Max and I had a few errands to run this morning so I thought I’d stop by.” He hadn’t called to let Erin know that he was on his way over. In fact, he’d planned the morning visit because she’d told him the majority of her time was spent at the café. Apparently, however, that didn’t mean today.

As he followed her into the barn, Max chattered on about the “black-and-blue” pancakes Lucas had made for breakfast.

“Cowboys like ’em the best,” he told her matter-of-factly.

“Really? I didn’t know that.” Erin glanced at Lucas. “How do you make, ah, black-and-blue pancakes?”

“It’s easy,” he said ruefully. “The blue comes from the blueberries and the black when you forget to flip them while you’re stirring the orange juice.”

Erin’s laughter swept through the barn…and his defenses. Lucas found it difficult to take his eyes off her.

Not a good sign.

Erin put a finger to her lips before sliding open the stall door. “Shh. Diamond likes it quiet so her baby can sleep.”

“I’ll be quiet,” Max promised, staring up at Erin as if she were a fairy-tale princess come to life. A fairy-tale princess in faded corduroy and denim.

She looked totally at peace in her surroundings, something Lucas had never quite managed to achieve.

Maybe because it didn’t seem to matter that he’d juggled classes and work during the day and studied long into the night to earn his degree in veterinary science, graduating a year earlier than his classmates. No matter how much Lucas accomplished, he always heard his father’s voice tell him it wasn’t enough.

“You have a rebellious nature, Lucas. If you don’t listen to me and do what I say, you’re never going to amount to anything. You’ll disappoint everyone who cares about you and you’ll be alone. Sometimes I think that’s what you want.”

The words had cut deep, embedding themselves in Lucas’s heart. He’d discovered that nothing, not a steady paycheck, not pats on the back nor praise from his boss, could erase the words his father had spoken to him on the night he’d died.

They’d taken root and grown. Crowded out his ability to commit until he’d become the man Vern Clayton had predicted he would be.

“God loves you, Lucas, and He won’t turn His back on you. You’ll never be alone.”

Erin’s voice sounded sweet and clear, as if she’d just spoken the words out loud instead of years ago.

What would his life be like if he’d believed her, not his father?

Something shifted inside of Lucas and he struggled to regain his balance. “If you have something to do, go ahead,” he said curtly. “Max and I won’t be here long.”

That was one promise Lucas would make sure he kept.

“That’s all right.” The wary look in Erin’s eyes had returned. “I’ll introduce Max to Butterscotch and her kittens while you check on Diamond.”

Because she didn’t want to spend any more time in his company than necessary.

Lucas should have felt the same way. So why did he have the overwhelming urge to follow Erin as she led Max away?

Diamond greeted him with a snort as he stepped into the stall.

“Yeah, I know,” Lucas muttered. “The sooner we get this over with, the sooner our lives can get back to normal.”

As normal as life in Clayton would ever get, Lucas silently amended. And with Erin Fields less than fifty feet away, she was out of sight but definitely not out of mind.

The music of her laughter echoed through the barn and Lucas paused to listen until Diamond swung her head around and nipped his sleeve.

He was definitely out of his mind.

Ten minutes later Lucas found Erin and Max in a corner of the barn, playing with a litter of half-grown calico kittens with lime-green eyes. Max ambled over and tugged on his arm until Lucas bent down.

“Haveta go, Lucas,” he whispered.

“We will, buddy. As soon as I put my things away.”

“No.” Max shook his head vigorously. “Haveta go.”

Oh, that kind of go.

Lucas silently calculated how long it would take to get the nearest gas station without exceeding the speed limit. “Five minutes, Bud.”

“But I haveta go now.”

Erin sighed. “I do have indoor plumbing, Lucas.”

“Are you sure?”

Erin didn’t bother to grace that with a response, just closed the barn door and strode toward the house. They followed her inside, where the scent of cinnamon and apples permeated the air.

She pointed to a door at the end of the narrow hall. “Come into the kitchen when you’re done. I have to take a loaf of bread out of the oven.”

Lucas scooped Max up to hasten the trip but as they passed the living room, the boy let out a squeal that practically drilled a hole in Lucas’s left eardrum.

“Look at Erin’s tree!”

Lucas blinked. It wasn’t just a tree. The entire room resembled a Christmas card come to life.

The roundest balsam fir Lucas had ever seen took up an entire corner of the room, decked out in dozens of shimmering ornaments that caught and reflected the twinkling lights woven between the branches. A pine garland braided with gold ribbons ran the length of the fireplace mantle and a hand-carved nativity set graced the coffee table in front of the green corduroy sofa.

Lucas wanted to smack himself upside the head.

Christmas was only three weeks away and until now it hadn’t even appeared on his radar. His mother hadn’t decorated for the holiday. Maybe she didn’t bother anymore. But after what Max had been through…well, he deserved some of this.

The scents and sounds of the holiday.

A home.

Unfortunately, Lucas didn’t feel equipped to give the boy either one of them.

Erin appeared beside him. “I decorate the house the day after Thanksgiving every year. It’s a tradition Mom started.”

“I remember,” Lucas said without thinking.

Erin’s lips parted but no words came out. Maybe because there wasn’t anything to say that would banish the memories that crowded the air whenever they were together.

Max broke the silence. “What’s that?” He pointed at the nativity set, but Lucas shook his head.

“Sorry, buddy. First things first.”

Fortunately, Max accepted Lucas’s decision without a fuss, but there was no stopping him from taking a detour into the living room on their way back. Erin must have known that because she was waiting for them in the hallway.

“Do you mind?” Lucas needed permission before turning a four-year-old boy loose into her Christmas wonderland.

Erin shook her head. “There isn’t anything he can damage.”

“I’m not so sure about that,” Lucas muttered. As well behaved as Max was, he’d managed to turn Lisette’s home upside down in the space of a week. Fingerprints on the walls. A broken dish. Plastic trucks making roads in her potted plants.

Lucas had heard about it all. Which was why they had to find a place of their own. Soon.

His cell phone rang and he glanced at the name on the screen. “It’s Tweed,” he murmured, keeping a watchful eye on Max. “I should probably take it.”

Erin nodded. “Come on, Max. I have a special ornament on the tree. Let’s see if you can find it.” She took the boy by the hand and led him into the living room.

By the time Lucas returned, he found Max snuggled up on Erin’s lap, one of the nativity pieces clutched in his hand.

“Is everything all right?” Erin asked.

“One of Fred McKinney’s steers sliced its leg open and he thinks it’s going to need stitches.”

“What about Max?” Erin frowned. “Is he going with you?”

Lucas didn’t get a chance to answer because Max sat up straight and began to shake his head.

“Nope. I’m stayin’ with Erin.”

“Listen, buddy—”

“Bye, Lucas. See ya later.” Max flashed an enchanting smile that Erin matched with one of her own.

“I guess he’s staying with me.”

Lucas wondered if the preschooler wasn’t smarter than he was. Because looking at Erin, at the warm light in her eyes and the arms wrapped protectively around his adopted son, he was suddenly having a hard time remembering why he’d ever left.



Erin ran a damp dishcloth over the refrigerator door and erased another smudge of green frosting.

The table resembled an artist’s palette and flour dusted the floor, making it look as if her kitchen had been the target of an early snow. By the time Erin pulled the last batch of cookies out of the oven, Max had been coated in a thin layer of frosting and sprinkles, looking a bit like one of the gingerbread men lining the counter.

She couldn’t help but smile at the memory.

Max was one hundred percent boy. Bright. Energetic. Inquisitive. And heartbreakingly sweet.

The trouble was, Erin had already had her heart broken once.

She turned the handle of the faucet with a little more force than was necessary.

Maybe she shouldn’t have been so quick to agree to babysit.

But somehow, Max’s wide, little boy grin had pushed every one of her doubts about keeping her distance from Lucas aside.

She padded down the hallway to the living room, where she’d left Max playing with the nativity set while she straightened up the kitchen. The wooden figurines had fascinated him. Erin had answered a dozen questions about each piece and tried to explain, in a way that a four year old could understand, why there was a baby sleeping inside the miniature barn.

Max’s lack of knowledge about the Christmas story made her heart ache.

As the son of a medical missionary, Lucas knew the Bible inside and out, but he had turned his back on his faith when they were in high school. He’d told Erin that he probably wouldn’t be able to live up to God’s expectations any more than he could his father’s, so why even try?

And even though Lucas had walked away from her, too, Erin had never stopped praying that he would eventually find his way back to God. Over the past few days, she’d felt the burden to pray for him even more.

There’s a reason You brought Lucas back to Clayton, Lord. Show him that You love him and help him let go of the past. Max needs Lucas to be a loving father…and Lucas needs You to show him how.

Peeking around the corner, she spotted the boy curled up on the sofa next to Winston, sound asleep, the ragged tail of his blanket clutched in one small hand.

An image of Lucas, holding the rumpled square of bright green fleece, rose up in her mind. He’d retrieved the blanket from the truck and brought it up to the house to give to Max before he’d left. Erin had been touched by the gesture, but the self-conscious look on Lucas’s face told her that he wasn’t comfortable with his new role.

Erin wasn’t completely comfortable with it, either.

He belongs to me.

Lucas. A father.

How many hours had she spent doodling their names in her notebook during study hall? Planning their wedding? Their family?

Their future.

Until he’d set out on his own and crushed every one of those girlish fantasies. Erin’s faith had been the only thing holding her together during those first few days. And as those days turned into months and the months became years, new dreams eventually began to kindle from the ashes of the ones that had once revolved around Lucas.

If you keep looking back, you might miss something good that’s right there in front of you.

One of her mom’s many pearls of wisdom. And one that Erin had finally taken to heart. It was the reason she kept a smile on her face and her calendar full. Every morning she asked God to teach her contentment—to show her the good that was right in front of her.

And right now, no matter how conflicted her feelings for Lucas Clayton might be, the “good” in front of her was Max.

As Erin leaned down to tuck a corner of the blanket more snuggly around his thin shoulders, she heard a soft knock on the front door.

By the time she reached the doorframe, Lucas already stood in the front hallway. And once again, her traitorous heart stalled at the sight of him.

Lucas had always been good-looking, but the last seven years had wrought subtle changes. At six foot two, he still towered above her, but he was no longer the lanky teenager that Erin remembered. The sun had permanently stained his skin a golden-bronze, a striking contrast to those incredible blue eyes. Clayton blue, Erin had heard someone call them once.

Erin remembered Lucas rolling his eyes when she’d repeated the comment.

“First we get a town named after us and now a color. What’s next? A mountain range? A national monument?”

“There’s nothing wrong with the name Clayton.” Erin had given him a playful swat on the arm.

Lucas had smiled that slow smile that never failed to melt her heart like butter in a hot skillet. “I’m glad you feel that way.”

Erin had been afraid to read too much into the statement. Until Lucas had leaned forward and kissed her.

Her first kiss…

Don’t. Look. Back.

Erin silently repeated the words. Lucas Clayton happened to be part of her past and, thanks to George Sr.’s will, an unexpected part of her present. But he was definitely not a part of her future.

That’s what she needed to remember.

“Lucas.” She flashed a polite smile—the same one that every cowboy who came into the café received with a cup of coffee.

He drove a hand through his hair and snowflakes drifted down like bits of silver confetti. “I’m sorry it’s so late. Is Max ready to leave?”

“He’s sound asleep.”

“Right.” Lucas sighed. “He usually takes a nap around this time. I’ll carry him out to the truck.”

Something in the weary slump of his shoulders tugged at her conscience.

“Would you like to thaw out with a cup of coffee first?” Erin couldn’t believe she’d said the words. Out loud.

And Lucas hesitated just long enough to make her wish she could take back the invitation.


Chapter Five

“Sure.” The husky rumble of Lucas’s voice scraped away another layer from her defenses. “I appreciate it.”

No problem.

Erin wanted to say the words but they got stuck in her throat. She was all too aware of Lucas as he followed her into the kitchen.

He let out a low whistle. “Max must have slept a long time.”

“What makes you say that?”

One eyebrow lifted. “The ten dozen Christmas cookies on your counter?”

“It’s only five dozen.” Erin reached for a clean coffee mug in the dish drainer. “And Max wasn’t sleeping. He helped me.”

“Max helped you?” Lucas repeated in disbelief.

“Technically, we divided the work. I baked the cookies and Max decorated them.”

Lucas’s lips twitched. “I guess the three-eyed snowmen should have given it away.”

Erin filled the mug, trying to keep her wits about her. Which wasn’t easy with Lucas three feet away. Close enough for her to breathe in the scent of leather, crisp mountain air and the hint of soap that was uniquely his.

You can do this. Just pretend you’re at the café and he’s a customer, remember? “Do you take cream or sugar?”

“Just black.”

So far, so good. “How did it go out at the McKinney place?”

Instead of taking a drink, Lucas folded his hands around the steaming mug, as if trying to absorb its warmth. “Ten stitches.”

“Ouch.” Erin winced.

“Don’t feel too bad for the steer,” Lucas said drily. “He only ended up with six of them.”

“Then who…” For the first time, Erin noticed the gauze bandage peeking out from the cuff of Lucas’s sleeve. “You got the other four?”

“That’s why I’m late. Arabella called my cell when I was on my way back and I happened to mention the injury. I’ll know better next time. Jonathan Turner was waiting in the driveway when I got back to the clinic,” Lucas said, his expression rueful. “I heard she was dating a doctor but I didn’t think I’d meet the guy while he was stitching up my hand.”

“What happened?” Erin was almost afraid to ask.

“Apparently he didn’t like my bedside manner—the steer, not Mr. McKinney.” Lucas shrugged. “It comes with the job, you know.”

“I’ll have to take your word for that.”

An awkward silence filled the space between them. Was Lucas remembering how she’d once dreamed of being a veterinarian?

Their eyes met across the table and Lucas set the cup down.

“I should go. Thanks again for keeping an eye on Max.”

Just like that.

Erin’s throat tightened. Apparently Lucas found it no more difficult to walk away from her now than he had all those years ago. Further proof that his feelings hadn’t been as deep as hers.

You weren’t enough to keep him here…

Vincent’s mocking words cycled through her mind and she turned away so Lucas wouldn’t see her expression. In her heart of hearts, Erin might wish for Lucas to still feel something for her, but she didn’t want it to be pity.

Poor Erin Fields. Still hung up on her first crush.

She needed to pray that God would help her let go of the past, too.

“I’ll pack up some cookies for you to take home.” Erin reached for a decorative tin on the second shelf and began to pack it with three-eyed snowmen and pink reindeer, hoping Lucas wouldn’t notice that her hands were shaking.

Which wouldn’t have been as obvious if he’d remained sitting at the table. But no. He got up, closed the distance between them in two short strides and began to help.

“You’ve got green and red sprinkles in your hair.”

“Christmas decorations,” Erin shot back, a little surprised that she could do polite and funny. “I get a little carried away.”

Lucas, however, didn’t appear amused. His eyes narrowed, searching her face as if he were looking for something. Or someone.

What did he see when he looked at her? The girl he’d claimed to have loved? Or one more mistake he’d made?

The air emptied out of Erin’s lungs as his fingers brushed against her hair. “Erin—”

Whatever he’d been about to say was lost in the high-pitched scream that pierced the air.



Not again.

Not now.

Lucas sprinted down the hall, vaguely aware that Erin was right behind him, already apologizing for something he knew wasn’t her fault.

He should have warned her this could happen, but he hadn’t anticipated being gone so long. And the truth was, he never knew when a dark memory would emerge and trigger another one of Max’s episodes.

The social worker had encouraged Lucas to give Max time to adjust to all the changes in his life. He’d gone through a lot for someone of his tender age, but he didn’t have the ability to process what had happened. Reality and imagination had a way of becoming tangled. The result was a waking nightmare for Max and a sleepless night for Lucas.

He rounded the corner and spotted Max bolt upright on the sofa, his small body rigid with terror, eyes wide and riveted on some unseen threat.

Erin’s soft gasp punctuated the air and Lucas remembered how he’d felt the first time he’d seen Max like this. The way he still felt when he saw Max like this.

He glanced at Erin to gauge her reaction. To his astonishment, she didn’t rush over, pick Max up and rattle off a bunch of questions that he couldn’t answer. She stopped in the center of the room, as if she trusted that Lucas knew what to do.

Yeah, right.

When it came to stuff like this, Lucas would have loved to defer to an expert. Unfortunately, there was never one around when you needed one. Max was stuck with a guy who knew more about four-year-old horses than four-year-old boys.

He lowered himself onto the sofa next to Max as casually as if they were going to watch Monday-night football.

“Hey, buddy.” Lucas didn’t expect a response. He’d learned that words couldn’t penetrate the invisible wall that separated them, but talking to Max made him feel better.

He slanted a quick look at Erin. She was watching them but her lips moved in a silent plea.

This was the second time he’d caught her praying. Erin’s faith had been strong as a teenager and it looked as if she’d held on to it over the years.

That made one of them.

Lucas felt a stab of envy that a close relationship with God had always seemed to come so naturally to her. Over the past few months, when he’d tried to get Max to safety, there’d been times he had wanted to call on God but figured he no longer had the right. He’d made a decision a long time ago to make his own way—it seemed a little hypocritical to ask for help when things got tough. Still, it was comforting to think that God might intervene on Max’s behalf because Erin was the one doing the asking.

Ignoring the dull ache from the stitches in his arm, Lucas carefully drew Max against his chest and waited. The only sound in the room came from the crackle and spit of the logs in the fireplace.

As if Max were a frozen statue coming back to life, Lucas gradually felt the thin shoulders relax. The rapid drumbeat of his heart began to even out.

“Lucas?” Max whimpered.

“I’m right here, buddy.”

“It’s dark.”

The fireplace cast plenty of light, but Lucas didn’t argue. He wasn’t sure if Max had always been afraid of the dark or if it had something to do with the fact that when Lucas found him, he’d been locked in a windowless room not much bigger than a closet.

Erin moved across the room, and Lucas assumed she was going to turn on another light. Instead, she reached down and plugged in the Christmas tree. Hundreds of tiny lights, in a rainbow of colors, began to wink in the branches.

Max hooked two fingers in his cheek and settled against Lucas’s shoulder, his gaze focused on the lights rather than the dark memory that had held him captive in its grip.

“Something sure smells good, Erin.” Lucas sniffed the air appreciatively. “Like…cookies?”

Erin caught on immediately. “That’s right. Gingerbread,” she said, her light tone matching his.

Max looked up at him. “Me and Erin maked ’em.”

Lucas felt the knot in his chest loosen. “I’ll bet they’re delicious.”

“I ate a tree with sprinkles,” Max informed him. “Erin eats the frostin’ with a spoon.”

“Is that so?” Lucas bit back a smile as color bloomed in Erin’s cheeks.

“Someone has to taste test it.” The concern in her eyes remained, but she reached out and playfully tweaked Max’s toes. “You can take some cookies home for your grandma and Aunt Mei. How about that?”

“An’ Jamie an’ Julie an’ Jessie?” Fear dissipated like a morning mist, unveiling a familiar sparkle in Max’s eyes.

“Ahh.” Erin looked at him in understanding. “He met Arabella’s triplets.”

“Yesterday.” Lucas winced at the memory.

For an entire week after his arrival, settling Max in and working out the details of his new job had been handy excuses to avoid his extended family.

He’d gotten good at dodging them until Mei cornered him in their mother’s kitchen with a message from his cousin, Arabella Michaels. It was time he “make the rounds” and introduce Max to his new family.

Starting with her.

Lucas had braced himself for that first official reunion with a member of his extended family, anticipating anything from awkward silence to outright hostility that he’d returned to Clayton so close to the deadline.

Instead, Lucas had been shocked by the warm welcome he’d received. Something had changed in his family but he wasn’t sure what it was. And probably wouldn’t be around long enough to find out…

“They’re sweet little girls,” Erin was saying.

“They’re trouble in triplicate,” Lucas muttered. “They were playing ‘wedding.’ If I hadn’t stepped in, they would have painted Max’s fingernails pink.”

Erin’s lips curved into a smile. “I’m not surprised, with Jasmine and Cade’s wedding coming up in a few weeks.”

“Mei mentioned they were getting married on Christmas Eve.”

She nodded. “Everyone has been chipping in to help. Kylie Jones has been acting as Jasmine’s unofficial wedding planner, and Vivienne is planning the menu for the reception. Arabella is baking the cake and Zach is going to walk her down the aisle.”

Lucas was stunned into silence—and not only because Erin knew more about what was going in his cousins’ lives than he did.

“You don’t approve?”

“I guess I’m surprised they do,” he admitted. “Nothing against Jasmine or Cade, but they just graduated from high school last spring. They’re pretty young to tie themselves down like that. They have their whole future ahead of them.”

He saw Erin’s expression change and wished he could take back the words.

But it was too late.

Jasmine and Cade weren’t much older than they’d been the night Lucas had shown up at her door and proposed. No candlelight or flowers. Not even a ring.

Erin had deserved better than what he’d offered the night he left town.

She still did.



Erin tried not to let Lucas see how his comment had affected her.

If she’d ever wondered if he’d regretted leaving her behind, she didn’t have to wonder anymore.

Once he’d crossed the Colorado state line, he’d probably turned a few cartwheels, relieved that he didn’t have anyone “tying him down.”

She turned her attention back to Max, who had been listening to their exchange with wide-eyed fascination, and tapped a finger against the tip of his nose. If Lucas could pretend everything was fine, so could she.

“How about I make sure you have enough cookies for the whole family?”

“Okay.” Max reached for a wooden camel on the coffee table and held it up in front of Lucas. “This one’s Bob.”

“Bob, huh? That’s a good name.” Lucas kept a straight face as he examined the carving.

Erin watched the exchange, still not exactly sure what had happened.

When she’d heard Max scream, she assumed that he had rolled off the sofa in his sleep. But Lucas had brushed aside her apology, as if he’d known something else had happened.

Erin’s stomach had dropped to her feet when she’d seen Max sitting on the sofa, the color stripped from his rosy cheeks and his pupils dilated with fear. She’d seen wounded animals in that condition but never a child.




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