Plain Jane and Doctor Dad
Plain Jane and Doctor Dad
Kate Little
Maura Chambers needed help with her unborn baby. Doug Connelly wanted to make up for a friend's bad judgment. Not the best reasons for marriage, but enough to make Maura and Doug say "I do."It was to be a marriage of convenience, to get Maura through a difficult time. But how, then, could she explain the hungry look in Doug's amber eyes, the longing she felt during their nights together? The handsome doctor's hands made her feel nothing like a plain Jane nurse but rather like a wanton, wanted woman. Everything was within reach–a husband, a family. Until she discovered Doug's little secret…
AROUND CHI-TOWN
May: It’s wedding bells once again for the Connellys. This time, they’re ringing for the newest member of Chicago’s “royal family”—Dr. Doug Connelly. In a private ceremony downtown, he wed nurse Maura Chambers. Kudos to her for landing Chicago’s best-looking pediatrician since George Clooney’s Dr. Ross.
It was just a short while ago that patriarch Grant Connelly was reunited with his long-lost illegitimate sons, twins Doug and Chance Barnett. The latter, a Navy SEAL, is reported to be off on yet another secret mission.
Not even the presence of two more powerful Connelly men could prevent a near-disaster at Connelly Corporation last night when a computer crash nearly wiped out the giant’s software. A company spokesman said they’re not ruling out sabotage.
With his meteoric rise to the top of the American business scene and his beautiful, former-princess wife, Grant must surely be the target of the green-eyed monster. But exactly who has it in for the well-respected Chicago icon?
Dear Reader,
Looking for romances with a healthy dose of passion? Don’t miss Silhouette Desire’s red-hot May lineup of passionate, powerful and provocative love stories!
Start with our MAN OF THE MONTH, His Majesty, M.D., by bestselling author Leanne Banks. This latest title in the ROYAL DUMONTS miniseries features an explosive engagement of convenience between a reluctant royal and a determined heiress. Then, in Kate Little’s Plain Jane & Doctor Dad, the new installment of Desire’s continuity series DYNASTIES: THE CONNELLYS, a rugged Connelly sweeps a pregnant heroine off her feet.
A brooding cowboy learns about love and family in Taming Blackhawk, a SECRETS! title by Barbara McCauley. Reader favorite Sara Orwig offers a brand-new title in the exciting TEXAS CATTLEMAN’S CLUB: THE LAST BACHELOR series. In The Playboy Meets His Match, enemies become lovers and then some.
A sexy single mom is partnered with a lonesome rancher in Kathie DeNosky’s Cassie’s Cowboy Daddy. And in Anne Marie Winston’s Billionaire Bachelors: Garrett, sparks fly when a tycoon shares a cabin with the woman he believes was his stepfather’s mistress.
Bring passion into your life this month by indulging in all six of these sensual sizzlers.
Enjoy!
Joan Marlow Golan
Senior Editor, Silhouette Desire
Plain Jane & Doctor Dad
Kate Little
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
KATE LITTLE
claims to have lots of experience with romance—“the fictional kind, that is,” she is quick to clarify. She has been both an author and an editor of romance fiction for over fifteen years. She believes that a good romance will make the reader experience all the tension, thrills and agony of falling madly, deeply and wildly in love. She enjoys watching the characters in her books go crazy for each other, but hates to see the blissful couple disappear when it’s time for them to live happily ever after. In addition to writing romance novels, Kate also writes fiction and nonfiction for young adults. She lives on Long Island, New York, with her husband and daughter.
MEET THE CONNELLYS
Meet the Connellys of Chicago—wealthy, powerful and rocked by scandal, betrayal…and passion!
Who’s Who in PLAIN JANE & DOCTOR DAD
Dr. Doug Connelly—Within months, he found his long-lost father, Grant Connelly, and a family-to-be with pregnant Maura. But can the divorced doctor let them into his barricaded heart?
Maura Chambers—Though pregnant and alone, she vowed to give her baby everything—everything but a father. Then Doug offered his name…. Dare Maura hope for more?
Angie Donahue—Years ago she loved Grant Connelly and gave him a child…. Now she’s back—not for a reunion, but for revenge.
Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
One
As Nurse Maura Chambers left Scott’s office, she knew she’d never see him again. But he didn’t say “Good luck” or even “Good-bye.” He merely shuffled papers around on his desk as she slipped through the doorway, ignoring her, as if she had already vanished from his sight.
She stepped from the quiet chamber into the busy hospital corridor, resisting the urge to give his door one last, resounding slam. What good would that do her now? It would only give the major-league gossips on staff more to talk about. Hadn’t they already gotten enough mileage out of her failed romance? Anyway, in a matter of days Scott would be gone for good, starting a new job and a new life hundreds of miles away. And she’d be free of him. Almost.
Maura took a deep breath and started down the crowded hallway, willing herself to look as busy as everyone around her. She kept her gaze downcast, avoiding eye contact with anyone who might stop her to ask why she looked so upset. She didn’t feel like talking about her problems now. Not to anyone.
As much as she’d dreaded facing Scott Walker again, she’d been obligated to disclose her secret. After all, he bore his fair share of responsibility. But it only took a moment for Maura to realize Scott didn’t see the matter that way. Not at all. His reaction had been more than disappointing. More than cold or unsympathetic. His attitude and succinct advice had made her sick to her stomach.
Well, what did you really expect? she asked herself. Haven’t you known for weeks now what kind of man he is? It had been clear to her ever since the night Scott had announced, out of the blue, that he was leaving Chicago General. Leaving the city entirely for a new job as a hospital administrator in Minneapolis. Why would he be any different now?
Looking back, she felt angry all over again to see his calculated tactics so clearly. How he had chosen a fancy restaurant for their talk, a place so exclusive and formal he could almost be assured she wouldn’t make a scene. As the maître d’ had led them to their secluded, candle-lit table, Maura had thought Scott might even be planning to propose.
He had a little speech planned for her, all right, but it wasn’t about marriage. Quite the opposite. Getting to know her the past six months had been great. Really fun, he’d said in a sympathetic tone. But the problem was, he’d be moving to Minnesota in a few weeks. He’d found a great job. Just what he’d been hoping for. She wouldn’t want to hold him back, would she? Besides, they both knew this was a casual relationship. No strings. No expectations.
Then, ignoring her stunned expression, he’d patted her hand. Long-distance things never seemed to work out, he’d added, so it was best for both of them to end it now. To make a clean break. In a few weeks, he was sure, she’d thank him for making it so easy. She’d be happy she was free to meet someone new.
He hadn’t waited for her answer. She was far too shocked at the time to make any reply at all.
It was right at that moment that she suddenly saw Scott differently, saw his true nature clearly. How had she been so blind? Was he that adept at misleading people? While she thought they were involved in a serious relationship—one that could lead to marriage—he’d merely been using her.
Maura felt a bitter taste at the memory. She touched her fingers to her eyes. She was crying. It seemed impossible that she had any tears left after the way she’d cried that night. She stopped walking and leaned against the wall of the corridor. Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she reached into her pocket for a tissue.
“Maura?” She felt a touch on her shoulder and turned to see Doug Connelly’s tall, commanding form beside her. “Are you all right?” he asked kindly.
“Uh…sure. I’ve just got something in my eye. A bit of dust or something,” Maura mumbled. She pressed the tissue to her eye. “It will go away in a second.”
“Here, let me see,” Doug offered.
“No, really…it’s okay,” Maura murmured. But before she could resist, he took her chin in his gentle grasp and turned her face up to the light.
His touch was firm but light, as she expected. He was a pediatric cardiologist, adept at putting his small patients at ease. His questioning gaze considered her troubled expression and she was sure he could see now that she’d lied to him. She was upset and crying, pure and simple.
“It looks as if it might be gone,” he said quietly. His hand dropped away, but he continued to gaze down at her, his warm, amber eyes filled with concern.
They stood in a section of the hallway that was mostly glass, offering a courtyard view filled with trees, flowers and benches. Visitors and patients used it mainly, but some of the staff were outside, too, stealing a few minutes from their demanding jobs.
“What a day,” Doug said. “Sometimes in this city, you feel like winter will never end. Then all of a sudden—bam. You look up and it’s spring.”
“Yes, spring did come suddenly this year.” Maura looked out at the trees and flowers in full bloom. She’d been so depressed and distracted the past few weeks, she’d hardly noticed the changes.
“Let’s get some fresh air. You look like you could use it.” Doug took her arm without waiting for her reply.
“Thanks, but I really have to get back to the floor.” Maura glanced at her watch, trying to excuse herself.
But Doug wouldn’t let her leave his side so easily. “You can take a break for a few minutes, Maura. We’ll cut across the courtyard and you can catch the elevators on the other side. That’s closer to your station, anyway.”
Before Maura knew it, they were outside, walking down a tree-lined path. She felt the sunshine on her skin and inhaled the soft spring air. Doug had been right: she felt better almost instantly.
She glanced at his rugged profile and tall, lean form. He walked with his hands tucked into the pockets of his blue lab coat, his ever-present stethoscope slung around his neck, clearly enjoying a break in his hectic schedule. She had worked with many keenly intelligent doctors and many dedicated ones, as well, but she’d rarely met a physician who possessed both qualities in such abundance. Doug was more than dedicated. He was known as a bit of a workaholic, but he was an excellent physician. Maura was sure she knew none better. His powers of concentration and focus seemed evident even now, in his thoughtful expression and the firm set of his handsome features.
They strolled along in silence, side by side, but it was a comfortable silence for Maura. She had first come to know Doug as a colleague, when she’d been caring for one of his patients. After that, they’d quickly become friends. Especially after learning that Doug and Scott had gone to college together and had once been good friends. They’d been out of touch for years and had met again recently, when Scott came to work at Chicago General.
She often wondered how much Doug knew about her relationship with Scott and how close the two men were now. Scott always claimed he liked Doug, but often made cutting remarks about him. Maura could see Scott was simply jealous. He had once hoped to be a doctor, too, but had dropped out of medical school his first year. The same school from which Doug had graduated with honors.
While she wouldn’t consider Doug a close friend, she had always felt a subtle but very strong connection to him. From the start they’d been able to talk to each other in an open, honest way. Which was quite unusual for Maura. She had always been shy with men, especially one so good-looking. But she rarely felt awkward with him. Something about him just put her at ease.
“Sit a minute,” Doug suggested as they came to an empty bench.
“Sure.” Maura shrugged and sat down. The bench was in the shade, facing a small fountain surrounded by flowers. The sound of the rippling water soothed her frazzled nerves, as did Doug’s quiet, solid presence.
“Maura, what is it? What’s troubling you?” Doug asked finally.
She turned to look at him. “What do you mean?”
“I know you were crying back there. And you look pale as a sheet.”
Maura felt suddenly self-conscious under his scrutiny. She pushed a strand of wavy hair away from her face.
“I’m fine…I mean, I feel a little under the weather today. Just tired, I guess.”
“Yes, you do look tired. You work too hard.”
“Probably.” She knew it was more like crying too hard—and sleeping too little.
Doug was quiet again for a moment. Then he said, “Is this about Scott? Are you upset because he’s leaving on Friday?”
“No. Not at all.” She shook her head.
That was what everyone must think, she realized. That she was still yearning after a man who had treated her so badly. “Relieved is more like it,” she added. “I wish he was already gone.”
“He didn’t deserve you.” Doug’s tone was firm and deep.
“That’s nice of you to say,” Maura replied quietly.
“I wasn’t saying it to be nice. It’s the truth.” He paused, as if uncertain whether to continue. Then he said, “I know it feels awful, right now. But give it time. Before you know it, you’ll forget all about him.” He leaned toward her. “Maybe you should take some time off, get away for a while,” he suggested.
“Yes, maybe I should,” she replied vaguely. Last night she had thought about visiting her sister on the West Coast, the only real family she had left. But she knew very well that no matter how fast or how far she ran, she could never escape this problem.
She turned and looked at him and could see he was sincerely worried about her. The look in his eye, the sheer kindness and consideration, was her undoing. She had been on an emotional roller coaster the past twenty-four hours, and having Doug, of all people, look at her that way made her feel as if she was about to burst into tears again.
She felt the moisture well up in her eyes and dropped her face into her hands. Then she felt Doug’s strong arm circle her shoulders as hot tears streamed down her cheeks. Doug pulled her closer, his grip strong and warm around her, his chest firm under her cheek. She was crying hard, sobbing uncontrollably, unable to stop herself.
“It’s okay,” she heard him murmur against her hair.
She tried to speak and felt a giant lump in her throat again. No, it’s not okay, she wanted to say. It’s anything but.
“Just cry if you need to,” Doug whispered.
“Oh, Doug…I’m sorry. I just don’t know what to do….”
Her voice trailed off in another wave of tears and she pressed her face against his hard chest.
She felt Doug’s strong hand stroking her hair. She felt the warmth of his body and breathed in the scent of his skin. With her eyes closed and her cheek nestled in the crook of his shoulder, she felt safe and protected. For the briefest moment, Maura allowed herself the lovely fantasy that she could stay this way forever. How much easier everything would be.
But that was impossible. She had to pull herself together. There was no one to help her out of this mess. Doug might offer his strong shoulder to cry on, but he didn’t have a white charger standing by for a quick getaway. He was only trying to be a good friend.
She took a deep breath and forced herself to move away from his embrace.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you by talking about Scott,” Doug apologized.
“It wasn’t that.” She wiped her eyes and took a shaky breath. She felt him watching her, waiting for her to speak.
Finally, she said, “It’s just that I have this problem….” She paused again and staring straight ahead, she admitted, “I’m pregnant.”
She wasn’t sure why she’d told him. The words spoken aloud sounded so final. So overwhelming. Doug looked shocked for an instant. Then he quickly hid his reaction, she noticed. He was silent for a long moment, and she watched as his pensive expression grew harsher. Angrier.
“With Scott’s child,” he said.
Though it wasn’t a question, she nodded and looked away again.
He leaned forward and pushed his hand through his thick hair. “Does he know?”
“I told him a few minutes ago. In his office. That’s why I looked upset in the hall,” she admitted.
“He didn’t take the news very well, I guess,” Doug replied sternly.
“No. He didn’t.”
The ugly scene replayed in her mind, and suddenly she couldn’t bear talking about it anymore.
“Listen, thanks for talking to me,” she said as she stood to go. “But I’d better get back to work. I’ve already been gone way too long.”
“I understand.” He nodded and came to his feet. “Maybe I’ll see you later, when I do rounds.”
“Sure. And I’m sorry for crying all over you.” He must see her as some kind of flailing, helpless female, she thought, when in fact, she was just the opposite.
“Don’t even think about it, Maura.” His tone was soft and sincere. Maura met his gaze briefly, then turned on her way.
She hurried across the courtyard, then entered the hospital. To avoid the long wait for the elevator, she walked up three flights to the pediatrics department. Her supervisor, Gloria Jones, greeted her with a questioning look but didn’t ask why she was so late returning from her break. There was plenty of work waiting, and Maura dug in, eager to focus on her patients instead of her problems.
As the afternoon passed, her thoughts returned to her disturbing confrontation with Scott—and her conversation with Dr. Connelly. She’d never had such a personal conversation with Doug before. But now she was thankful that, purely by chance, he’d been there for her at such an awful moment. Crying on his shoulder hadn’t solved anything, but it had made her feel worlds better, lending her the boost she needed to carry on.
Some of the staff disliked the handsome pediatrician. They found him aloof and distant. But Maura had never felt that way. He was sometimes distracted by his work, and even brooding. But a more dedicated doctor would be hard to find.
She had never imagined he would also be such a dedicated friend, the kind you could really count on when things went haywire. But whether you liked Doug Connelly or not, he was clearly a man of strong character, and Maura knew without question that her secret was safe.
Her workday wore on, thankfully free of pressing emergencies, as she had a pounding headache that wasn’t assuaged by the pills she’d taken earlier. Luckily, a night-shift nurse came in early, allowing Maura to go home.
She lived in a comfortable family neighborhood a short distance from the hospital. She’d been lucky to find a reasonably priced two-bedroom apartment in a renovated brownstone. Her living room even had a working fireplace, which she really appreciated during the long Chicago winters.
The apartment was the first she’d lived in without a roommate, and Maura had loved decorating it to her own taste. She liked antiques, but since she could only afford a few small pieces, she used her knack for finding interesting items that weren’t genuine antiques but still quaint and unique. The honey-tone wood floors were covered by area rugs, and the walls were warm shades of apricot and creamy white. Her home was her haven, her retreat from her hectic, demanding job. It was a private place where she could rest and recharge. Where she could hide away and sort out her thoughts when life tossed her some seemingly impossible crisis. Which was just the way she felt tonight as she slipped her key into the front door and went inside.
She dropped her mail on a table in the foyer without even glancing at it, then went straight to the bedroom and took a long, hot shower. Even though it was still early, she put on her nightgown and robe, then lay down on her bed, hoping to sleep. But worries immediately crowded her mind.
For some reason, instead of thinking about Scott, she thought about Doug, recalling the first time they’d met, months ago. She had recently started at the hospital and had been working the night shift. She was assigned to one of his patients, a four-year-old girl brought in with advanced pneumonia and serious heart complications. Purely by chance in the small hours of the night she’d discovered that the child was in serious trouble, in danger of heart failure.
When Doug found her with the patient minutes later, she was giving CPR as she waited for the crash cart and respiratory equipment to be hooked up. As Doug took charge, he barely said a personal word to her, but the respectful, grateful look in his eyes said it all.
That night she’d hardly been aware of his compelling good looks, or the smothering shyness that typically fell over her. Working through the crisis with him, she felt totally in synch, and the event somehow forged a mysterious but deep bond between them. She had never felt quite that way about anyone—not a coworker or even a romantic partner. But she had felt it that night with Doug, and forever after.
They had worked together for several hours to pull the little girl through. Even after Maura’s regular shift was done, she stayed on, unwilling to leave until she was sure the child was going to survive. She knew that some people thought it unwise to get so involved with each patient’s recovery. They advised compassion tempered by a cooler, more distant attitude to avoid the burnout that was so common among overworked nurses.
But Maura wasn’t made that way. She hadn’t become a pediatric nurse in order to be distant and detached from the children who needed her. She knew from the first that Doug was the same. Perhaps even more intensely involved with his young patients than she.
She later learned that the little girl’s family didn’t have much insurance and Doug had not even sent them a bill. While it was highly uncommon for a specialist of Doug’s caliber to forego payment, she soon learned that it wasn’t uncommon at all for him to work that way.
When morning came and the crisis had passed, she and Doug sat together outside on a bench in the same courtyard where they had talked today. They celebrated their victory, joking and laughing over cups of steaming coffee and sticky donuts. It was late January and the weather was frigid, yet she could still recall feeling elated by the cold air and early-morning light and the shared success in saving a child’s life.
It was then Doug learned she was dating Scott Walker, and Maura learned Doug was Scott’s old pal from college. There was something in Doug’s reaction to the news that made Maura think he was disappointed to hear she was seeing someone. But the moment passed and later she decided she’d imagined the brief flicker of interest.
On her side Maura would never deny that she found Doug very attractive. But at that time she had felt so committed to Scott, she’d never once thought of Doug in a romantic way.
Besides, Maura reflected, even if she had been free, Doug was not her type at all. For one thing, she was looking for a man who would have time in his life for a wife and family. Doug was far too focused on his work to make family life, or even a romantic relationship, a priority.
And he could be temperamental at times. She had to acknowledge that his smiles and bright moods were rare. He seemed most often to be shadowed by some deep, mysterious unhappiness, and too often she found a dark, brooding look in his eyes when he thought no one was watching him.
What brought on that somber mood of his? Was it the pressures of his work? Maura had always suspected it was something more. Some deep hurt in his past, some painful loss. Doug had never spoken to her about his past, but she did know from Scott that he’d gone through a difficult divorce a few years back.
As the months passed, she and Doug always had so much to say to each other whenever they met. She’d run into him on her floor while he did rounds, in the hallways, in the cafeteria. He would ask her advice about his cases, and she enjoyed helping him figure out some knotty problem in a diagnosis or discuss a curious turn in a patient’s condition.
It was unusual for a doctor of his standing to take a nurse into his confidence in that way, and she was secretly pleased, even proud, of the way he seemed to value her observations. But they didn’t only talk about patients. They talked about all kinds of things, movies, books, traveling to exotic places, which they both planned on doing someday when they weren’t working so hard.
But Maura had to acknowledge that, for all their interesting conversations, she still knew very little about him. The staff at Chicago General was always brimming with gossip, and while she avoided discussing other people’s lives, she had overheard a few basic facts about Doug. He had been at the hospital since his residency and at one time had been married. He was divorced for almost two years, but no one seemed to know what had gone wrong. His ex-wife was now married to a prominent plastic surgeon, and some said she’d hurt Doug badly with an affair.
Even though she didn’t have romantic designs on him herself, Maura wondered why he wasn’t in a new relationship, or even married again, by now. But her knowledgeable co-workers answered that question, too. Many hopeful women had pursued the handsome doctor, but the relationship had always ended unhappily. Despite his giving, caring nature as a physician, it was reported that Dr. Douglas Connelly was distant and even difficult as a romantic partner. An emotional Mount Everest with wickedly icy heights to scale.
Maura suspected his single-minded focus on his work had been the real problem. She knew it would be one for her. Some people didn’t need a home life and family. Maybe Doug was that type, she concluded. But a home and family was something Maura had always longed for, because she’d known so little security growing up.
When she’d met Scott, back in November, she’d believed at last she’d found a man who shared her values and outlook and wanted the same kind of life that she did.
Her thoughts drifted as sleep overcame her weary mind. How devastating it had been to discover that Scott had only pretended to be that kind of man, saying just what she’d wanted to hear in order to get what he’d wanted from her.
And by the time she saw him clearly, it was too late.
Two
Maura woke to the sound of sharp knocking on her front door. Her bedroom was dark, and the clock on the night table showed it was nearly eight. She sat up and pushed her hair back with her hand as she walked toward the foyer.
She wondered who it could be. Maybe her friend Liza, who lived downstairs. Liza often stopped by at night just to chat, mostly about her problems with boyfriends.
But Maura wasn’t in the mood to see Liza. She walked toward the door and tightened the sash on her robe, wondering what excuse she could make.
Just as the knock sounded again, Maura turned the lock. “Just a second,” she said.
She pulled the door open a space. Then felt herself jolted to the core by the sight of Doug’s tall, imposing form.
“Doug. What are you doing here?”
She was rarely so blunt, but he was that last person she’d expected. He’d only been to her apartment once, when her car wouldn’t start and he’d given her a lift home from the hospital. She didn’t even realize he remembered where she lived.
“I was on my way home and thought I’d stop by. I went to your station after my rounds, but they said you’d left early,” he added. “I hope you’re all right.”
He smiled at her, yet his gaze looked serious, questioning, as if he wasn’t sure he’d done the right thing by surprising her like this.
“Another nurse came in early, so I was able to leave before the shift ended,” she explained. “I was just taking a nap.”
“Have you had dinner yet? We could get something at the café around the corner if you like.”
“Thanks, but I think I’d rather stay in tonight. I mean, I appreciate you stopping over—”
“That’s all right. But I did want to talk to you some more. You seemed so upset today. I’m not sure it’s good for you to be alone.”
“I-I’m okay,” she insisted. “Really.” But she wasn’t okay and they both knew it.
“Maura?” Doug moved up to the opening in the door, his tone firm but concerned. “Please, let me in. I’ll only stay a minute.”
She took a deep breath. Then, without saying anything more, she stepped back and let him in. He was probably right. It wasn’t good for her to be alone right now. She might feel better if she talked to him for a while. He knew Scott and he seemed so understanding about her problem. Maybe he could help her sort things out.
She closed the door and they stood facing each other. A small lamp on a side table cast the foyer in soft, golden light. Shadows emphasized his strong features, his wide, firm mouth and amber eyes.
She suddenly felt self-conscious dressed in just her bathrobe, but there was no help for it. She knew she looked a mess, her hair hanging in wild waves down past her shoulders and her eyes circled with shadows. She met his steady gaze, then looked away, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.
“I know you’re tired. I won’t stay long,” he promised.
“It’s okay. I’m glad you’re here.” It was true, she realized. She met his gaze, then looked away. “Let’s go into the living room.”
She led the way and sat on the couch. Doug stood a short distance away, his brows drawn together in a frown. She suddenly wondered about the thoughts causing that dark look. Did he think badly of her, that she was not very particular or careful about her romantic partners? The irony was, if anything, it was her naiveté and lack of experience with men that had gotten her into this fix. But of course Doug wouldn’t know that, and she felt foolish trying to explain it to him, certain he’d think she was making excuses for herself.
Doug turned and sat down in the armchair across from her. “You never really told me what Scott said to you about the baby. Only that he reacted badly.”
She sighed and gripped her hands in her lap. “We didn’t part on the best terms. I basically haven’t spoken to him since he broke up with me and announced he was leaving for Minnesota. When I went to see him today, to tell him about the baby, he offered to pay for an abortion…but that was all.”
“That bastard.” Doug’s eyes glinted with anger. “Is that all he said to you? He didn’t say he’d help you through the pregnancy or support his own child?”
Maura had wanted to avoid relating the uglier details of the conversation, but now she decided to tell Doug all.
“No, just the opposite, actually. He said that if I had the child, it would be my responsibility and I’d have to take him to court before he’d share in any financial support. He also said he hoped I wouldn’t make a big deal out of this. It would be bad for my career and for his, and he hoped that I’d…I’d be smart and do the right thing.”
“He said that?” Doug rose to his feet, his fists balled as if he wanted to strike something or someone. “I’d like to do the right thing to him…that smug, self-righteous son of a—”
Maura had never seen Doug this angry. His powerful emotions frightened her. Was it due to some long-standing enmity or rivalry between him and Scott? A tension Scott had sometimes hinted about. Or was he simply angry on her behalf?
“Doug, please. I really don’t care if Scott’s involved. I did believe I was in love with him at one time,” she admitted, “but now I can see I was in some fantasyland. I never really knew him.”
Doug turned to her again, and she thought her words had taken some of the edge off his anger.
“I was shocked at first by his reaction,” she continued. “But maybe it’s a good thing that he wants no connection to me or the baby. With any luck I’ll never have anything to do with him again.”
He paced across the room, then suddenly turned to face her.
“Yes, I guess you’re right. You’re certainly better off without him,” he admitted in a calmer tone. “And my confronting him wouldn’t help matters, would it?”
“Not at all,” she assured him.
“Except to make me feel a hell of a lot better,” he added, more to himself than to Maura. He took a deep breath and she could see him willing himself to cool off.
“Sorry, Maura. This doesn’t help you any.” He shook his head then glanced down at her. “Have you decided what you’re going to do?”
He’d asked the question quietly, almost casually. Yet she sensed him focusing on her reply with laser-like intensity. Not just the way a friend would be interested, but as if the matter somehow affected him directly, as well.
“I want to keep my baby,” she said firmly. “I have to.”
“I knew you would say that.” Doug’s expression softened, and a warm light glowed in his eyes as he gazed at her. “But raising a child on your own will be hard. Harder than you think,” he said knowingly. “My mother was a single parent. She didn’t even have family to help her. She really did it all on her own. With twin boys, no less,” he added. “Until I was an adult, I never even understood or appreciated how much she had to deal with. Sometimes I know I can never fully appreciate it, either.”
Maura had not known that Doug had been raised only by his mother. It couldn’t have been easy for him growing up. The accomplishment of completing medical school seemed even more impressive now. He was right. It wouldn’t be an easy road for her or her child.
“I know what you’re saying. I’ve thought about this—the problems I’ll face. But I can’t see it any other way. I just can’t put the child up for adoption,” she added. It was hard to continue, but she forced herself. Now it was her turn to reveal some hidden part of her history. “I know what it’s like to be part of a family…but not really part of it. It’s a terrible, lonely feeling. Like you’re always on the outside looking in,” she added quietly, remembering unhappier times.
“I’d rather raise my child alone and give it all the love one parent can give than sit and wonder, every day, if my baby is happy and cared for.”
“You were adopted?” he asked.
She shook her head. “A foster child, from the time I was about twelve years old. Both my parents died in a car accident. My sister and I had no close relatives to raise us. We were split up and sent to different foster homes. Some of the people were nice to me. They wanted to help and tried to make me feel a part of their family. But there were always problems. I never stayed anywhere for very long,” she confided wistfully. “Then I managed to get a scholarship to college and started living on my own.”
“How sad to lose both your parents so young,” he said gravely. “At least I always had my mother and brother. You never mentioned your family before. I had no idea.”
“Yes, well, you never mentioned yours either,” she said. “We’ve never talked much about personal things like this before, have we?”
“No, we haven’t. But maybe it’s long past time that we did.”
He glanced at her briefly as he sat down on the other end of the couch, crossing one long leg over the other and stretching out his arm along the back of the sofa. Despite his size, he moved gracefully, Maura noticed, with a powerful masculine grace that was distracting to her.
“Considering all you’ve been through, Maura, I’d think you would have turned out differently somehow.”
“Differently? How do you mean?”
“I’m not sure exactly. Not nearly as optimistic for one thing. And you’re such a caring, giving person.”
His thoughtful words lifted her spirits and, more than that, made her remember who she was and what she was capable of.
“I had a good start, I guess. I had two parents who loved their children and loved each other. We lived in a small town in Wisconsin, just outside of Madison. It was really an ideal childhood, you might say.” She looked down for a moment and gathered her thoughts. “Sometimes when I think about my family life back then, I think it might be unfair to the baby to raise it on my own. I know that there are decent, good people out there who would give an adopted child lots of love and a wonderful home. And sometimes I do feel scared to do this on my own.”
She felt her throat tighten with emotion, making it hard to continue. She didn’t want to start crying again but felt the tears well up in her eyes. “I don’t know…I just feel so confused, so overwhelmed,” she admitted in a shaky voice.
Doug touched her shoulder. He seemed about to speak, then stopped himself. She could see he was giving her a moment to calm herself and collect her thoughts again.
It was still hard for Maura to believe she was pregnant.
How could she begin to explain it to Doug, when she herself hardly understood how this happened? To her, of all people? She’d always felt that physical intimacy between a man and a woman was a serious step, part of a relationship that included love and commitment. Even so, she had little experience that way and had always been so careful.
But Scott had had a way of sweeping aside her doubts and Maura had believed that she loved him. She had thought herself so lucky that a successful, good-looking man like Scott had wanted her. She couldn’t understand what had attracted him to a mousy little thing like her. She couldn’t help it, but that was how she thought of herself. She knew she wasn’t attractive and sexy like some of the women around the hospital. She was quite the opposite, the type people used to call a plain Jane, feeling most comfortable when she blended into the woodwork. Sometimes friends like Liza insisted that she had what it took to turn heads, if she would only play up her looks a bit. But Maura always thought they were just trying to be nice. She could never quite believe it.
Maybe she felt safer downplaying her looks. As a teenager, just starting to blossom, she’d had some bad experiences attracting the wrong kind of male attention—the clumsy and crass advances of boys and even adult men in her foster families. She had learned to put as little emphasis as possible on her appearance. In her heart she hoped that the right man would be attracted to what was inside, not to some pretty packaging.
That was part of the reason she thought Scott might be the right man for her. Plain Jane or not, Scott pursued her and wooed her, and she was very flattered by his attentions. While he sometimes acted thoughtlessly in a way that was hurtful to her, he always managed to win her back again. It was hard to stay mad at him when he turned on the charm.
She knew he had his faults. But didn’t everybody? Maura didn’t expect the man she married to be perfect. She had so little experience when it came to romance that she hardly knew what to expect. No wonder she now found herself in this situation.
She shook her head as if to clear her muddled thoughts, then glanced over at Doug. Their eyes met, his golden gaze full of concern for her. For her future and her baby’s, she thought.
She unconsciously touched her hand to her stomach, which was still perfectly flat. Yet she imagined the new life growing there, minute by minute, hour by hour.
“I’ve been thinking I might leave Chicago. It’s hard to raise a child here.”
“Leave Chicago?” Doug’s expression darkened. “Where would you go?”
“Maybe to Portland, to be near my sister, Ellen. Or maybe to Santa Fe. I have a good friend from school there. I might be better off someplace new, making a fresh start.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea at all, Maura,” Doug said sternly. He abruptly got up off the couch and paced across the room again, looking almost as disturbed as he’d been hearing about her talk with Scott.
“It’ll be difficult and stressful to start a new job and get settled in a new city,” he pointed out. “What if the pregnancy doesn’t go well? You’d be all alone, with no one to help you.”
But she was all alone now, here in Chicago, Maura wanted to say. But she didn’t want Doug to think she felt sorry for herself. She really didn’t.
“I’m confused, I guess. What do you think I should do?” she asked, her eyes wide and questioning.
He stared at her a long time, making Maura feel suddenly very aware of being alone with him. She thought he was about to say something, then saw the firm set of his mouth as he mentally backtracked.
“I think there’s a lot to sort out. But it sounds like you’ve made the most important decision of all. To keep the baby,” he said. He sat down on the couch again next to her, their bodies close but not touching. “I’m not sure you can figure out much more tonight.”
He was right. She was exhausted and it was hard to think clearly.
“I guess you’re right. I can’t figure out my entire future in five minutes.” She sighed and glanced over at him. “But thanks again for listening. It’s really helped me,” she said sincerely.
“I want to help you any way I can, Maura. I mean it,” he promised her.
The emotion in his voice surprised her, and before she could answer, he shifted over on the couch, closing the small space between them. He put his arm around her shoulder and held her close.
His nearness was a soothing balm to her soul. They didn’t talk for a few moments, and Maura allowed herself to simply relax and soak up the strength and comfort he offered.
After a time she said, “What really made you come here tonight?”
“Just what I said when I came in, I was worried about you and thought you could use some company.”
She honestly hadn’t realized that Doug thought about her as much as he apparently did. Maybe he didn’t think of her in a romantic way, but their relationship did seem to matter to him, she reflected.
Then he shifted and glanced down at her and she knew intuitively there was something more. Something he was reluctant to say.
“Look, I know this sounds crazy, but I feel like this is partly my fault. This problem of yours, I mean.” She felt his broad chest expand as he took a deep breath. “I’ve known Scott a very long time. I know how he treats women. I wasn’t surprised at all when I heard about the way he broke up with you,” he admitted. “Months ago, when I first met you and learned you were seeing him, I thought about saying something to you. To warn you in some way about him. But I didn’t want to interfere. I could see you really cared for him and he seemed to care for you. You seemed happy together,” he added, sounding almost angry to admit it, Maura noticed. Though she couldn’t understand why.
“Was I happy? Yes, at first I guess I was,” she agreed. “Until I really got to know him.”
“I’d hoped that maybe you would figure him out sooner than most, and get through it without any serious damage. But it didn’t turn out that way, I guess,” Doug said. “Does it bother you to hear these things about him?” he added.
Maura shook her head. “No, not at all. In a strange way it makes me feel better. When Scott broke up with me, I felt it was all my fault. As if there was some reason I couldn’t make him love me and want to stay with me. Now I can see that it wasn’t me at all.”
“No, not you at all, Maura. Scott would have been lucky beyond deserving if he’d made a commitment to you,” Doug assured her. “Still, I feel responsible for how things ended up. If I had told you about Scott, about his past, maybe this would never have happened.”
Maura was stunned by his line of reasoning. She pulled back and stared up at him. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’d never make that connection in a million years.”
“I know you don’t see it that way. But I do,” he argued. “I knew you were too good for him. I knew how he’d end things with you. Just like all the others. I should have warned you.”
“Even if you had, I wouldn’t have believed you or taken your advice to heart,” Maura replied honestly. “I really thought we were in love and that Scott wanted to marry me someday.”
“Maybe you wouldn’t have listened to me. Not at first. But it might have helped you see his true colors sooner,” he added somberly.
Maura met his gaze. Perhaps that was true. But what good did it do to wonder about that now? She had to deal with the present and figure out some plan for the future.
“It doesn’t matter. Let’s not argue about it,” she urged him. “The point is, I’m the only one responsible for dating Scott…and for everything that happened after.”
She rose abruptly, then instantly felt her head spin. Doug was beside her in a split second, his arm wrapped tightly around her waist.
“Maura, are you dizzy?”
“Just a little. I haven’t eaten much today,” she realized. “That must be it.”
He piled up some couch pillows so she could lie back comfortably. “Here, rest a minute. I’ll fix you something.”
“You don’t have to do that,” she said. “I can manage.”
“I said rest,” he ordered in a stern tone. “I’m the doctor, remember?”
When she looked up at him in surprise, he flashed a sexy, stubborn grin.
“Okay, okay. You win.” She sat back with a sigh and a small smile. “I didn’t know you could cook, Dr. Connelly,” she added curiously.
“Me? I’m great in the kitchen—if you like scrambled eggs and toast.”
Maura laughed for the first time in days.
“Eggs on the dry side, please. Just a little jelly on the toast,” she replied as her head sunk back into the pillows.
“You got it.” He leaned over and covered her with a throw, then strolled off to the kitchen.
Maura felt her eyes close, her scattered thoughts lulled by the sounds and tempting smells of Doug’s cooking and the powerful, calming force of his presence. For the first time in days she felt some tranquillity and some hope about the future.
Her hands floated protectively to her stomach and she thought about her baby. During all her shock and worry, the single most important element in all this had been obscured, she realized. She was honestly thrilled to be expecting a child, no matter what the circumstances.
When Doug had asked about her intentions, she hadn’t revealed half of her true feelings about the baby. The truth was she wanted this child more than anything. Becoming pregnant made her see that she was very much alone in the world. Maybe she had always wanted a child, to love and be loved by the one person in her life who would always belong to her. She had a good relationship with her sister, but Ellen lived in Portland and had a family of her own. Maura had no one truly close.
Since her parents’ tragic accident and the trauma of watching her family fall to pieces, Maura had been on a private journey, longing to return to that special place of warmth, love and security she had known as a child. She had imagined creating that kind of stable, loving home life as part of a traditional marriage. But it hadn’t happened that way. Now she had to play the cards she’d been dealt. Despite her worries and fears, in her heart she was grateful for the new life growing inside of her.
She loved her baby already and knew that she would do her utmost to give her child a good life, to give him or her all the love, security and happiness that a child deserves.
Even if she had to do it all on her own. It would work out somehow, she told herself. It would.
Eggs, milk and butter. A bowl, a frying pan and toaster. Doug easily found what he needed and set to work on Maura’s dinner. Their conversation had left him all stirred up, as emotionally scrambled as the bowl of beaten eggs in his hand, and he was glad to focus on some practical task, like cooking. He poured the eggs in the pan, then glanced out into the living room. Maura lay with her eyes closed, and he wondered if she’d fallen asleep. Just as well, he thought. She needed a break. And so did he, to sort out his thoughts about all this.
He felt bad for her, even partly responsible for the fix she was in. He truly wanted to help her, to do what he could. Doug knew that everything he’d just told Maura was true. But he also knew that there was one reaction to her news he had not disclosed. A gut response even stronger than all the rest.
He wanted a baby. He’d wanted one for a very long time. It was the real reason his marriage had fallen apart, and after that disaster his chances of being a father seemed even farther out of reach.
After his divorce, he just couldn’t seem to let any woman close enough for a serious relationship. He’d had that once, and once was enough. Romance was for movies and books, as far as he could see. People only fooled themselves into thinking those earth-shaking hormonal rushes were true love. After the tornado died down, there was only disappointment and pain.
So how would he ever be a father? Unless he got some woman pregnant by “accident,” as Scott had done to Maura. But that would never be Doug’s style.
He put two slices of bread into the toaster, then jammed it down with a bit more force than necessary. The news of Maura’s pregnancy and Scott’s reaction had felt like salt poured into an open wound. He cursed Scott for the way he’d treated her, and felt an even deeper bitterness for the way the man had turned his back on his child. Doug felt his jaw grow rigid as the anger swelled in him all over again. If a woman like Maura had come to him with news like that, it would have been the happiest day of his life. Why was life so unfair sometimes?
Doug scooped the cooked eggs onto a plate, then spread some jelly on the toast. He grabbed a fork and napkin, then headed out to the living room. But even before he reached the couch he could see that Maura was fast asleep. She looked so peaceful, as if she didn’t have a care in the world. He didn’t have the heart to wake her. Watching her sleep, he felt another wave of sympathy for her. She was such a good person. A wonderful person, truly. He really couldn’t remember knowing a woman he liked or respected more. She didn’t deserve Scott’s mistreatment. She didn’t deserve to face such an overwhelming problem all alone. But what could he do to help her? Stand by her as her friend? Give her money maybe, if she’d let him? There didn’t seem much he could do. And what if she moved away? What then? They would lose touch and he’d never see her again. Or her baby.
The possibility upset him. He almost had the urge to wake her and get her to talk some more about her plans. Instead he set the dish of eggs on the coffee table, then sat down to wait.
Maura’s eyes opened slowly. Doug’s face, very close to her own, filled her field of vision. His golden eyes glittered in the shadowy light, rugged features tempered by a slight smile. She stared up at him, studying the strong lines of his brow and chin, his amber eyes, square jaw and wide, soft mouth.
Then he lifted his hand and softly pushed a lock of her hair off her cheek…and she knew she wasn’t dreaming. This was real. Too real for her peace of mind.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep again,” she murmured.
“Better get used to it. Pregnant women fall asleep at the drop of a hat,” he reported with a slight smile. “Your scrambled eggs got cold. But you looked so peaceful, I didn’t have the heart to wake you.”
He was seated on the edge of the couch near her hip and leaning over her. His gaze met hers, and she couldn’t look away, feeling only vaguely aware of the movement of his hand, as it came to rest on the curve of her waist. Maura thought to sit up and move away, but she felt frozen in place. She felt as if everything was suddenly moving at a superslow pace. Even her words seemed delayed as she tried to speak.
“It must be late,” she said finally.
Doug made no move to check his watch, and she wondered if he had even heard her. His gaze moved slowly over her face, studying her, feature by feature, as if seeing her for the very first time.
“You probably ought to go,” she whispered.
“Probably,” he replied in a low, husky tone. His hand moved from her hair to cup her cheek, and before Maura could utter a single word, his mouth met hers in a deep, hungry kiss.
The touch of his lips to hers started out as a sensual savoring. Maura’s senses reeled with pleasure. All logical thought was totally short-circuited as Doug’s supple lips teased and tasted, coaxing her full response. Her hands automatically rose up to his strong shoulders, and the feel of his firm muscles and warm skin under fingertips instantly melted her last resistance.
She made a small moan in the back of her throat, a sound of half pleasure, half surrender.
She felt his response as his arms moved tightly around her, his kiss growing deeper. Their passion accelerated instantly, from zero to one hundred in a millisecond. It was as if a mysterious switch, hidden somewhere deep inside, had been flipped. Her mouth opened easily under his probing tongue, and her arms wound around his powerful shoulders. She felt him move next to her on the couch and she shifted over, so that he stretched out next to her, their legs and arms and tongues entwined.
The kiss that had begun so tenderly grew bolder. Hungry and intense. A knockout sensual punch that sent Maura’s senses spinning.
His embrace tightened as his tongue plunged into her mouth, sliding seductively against her own. His large, strong hands glided down her satin-covered back, sweeping over her waist and hips, then down to cup her bottom, pulling her close to his heat.
Then his warm lips left her mouth and wandered in a scintillating path down the column of her throat. His hand glided up over her soft curves and gently cupped her throbbing breast.
What was happening here? she wondered vaguely as she kissed him back. For all the months and all the intimacy she’d shared with Scott, he had never once kissed her like this.
No one had ever kissed her like this.
And never once had she felt this way in any man’s arms. So vibrantly alive, so sensual, so uninhibited.
Then suddenly, as if remembering himself, Doug lifted his head. “Maura…” he murmured in surprise. He dropped his head against her shoulder and took a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have done that,” he admitted in a harsh whisper.
Then, with some effort, he pulled away and pulled her robe up to cover her shoulders. “I came here to help you, not cause more problems.”
“I know that,” Maura said. She believed it, too.
Still, she felt shaken. Shaken to the core. His merest touch had sent her up in flames. She suddenly realized with a shock the strong attraction they shared. An attraction that she had so far been basically unaware of.
He sat up and took another long breath, then glanced at her with an awestruck expression. Then he got up and walked across the room as if he truly needed to put some space between them. He stood with his back to her, his hands on his hips.
Maura sat up, too, and fumbled with her robe. She wondered what he was thinking. Probably he was just plain confused. She felt confused, as well. One minute Doug was her pal, her surrogate big brother, and the next minute…
Well, to be perfectly honest, she always knew there was a spark on her side, but she’d been committed to Scott and never even dared explore those feelings. Besides, she only once had the slightest hint that Doug felt drawn to her that way. Did he have feelings for her that he’d never revealed because she was not free?
Then again, they had never been alone like this before, in such an intimate situation. An emotional tinderbox. That was it right there, she decided. Things like this can happen to people in a crisis. He’d just been swept away by the circumstances. He was feeling sorry for her, maybe even protective.
All these emotions had gotten confused in his mind. In her mind, too. It didn’t mean anything. She couldn’t allow herself to think that one kiss—one mind-blowing kiss, she had to admit—signaled something more.
Finally he turned to her, his handsome features calm and composed. She willed herself to act the same.
He looked about to speak, but she cut in before he could say a word. “That’s okay. Don’t even say it.”
His thick brows drew together in a frown. “How do you know what I was going to say?”
“I just know,” she replied. “You’re sorry you kissed me. You didn’t really mean it. These things happen. And you hope that it doesn’t change our friendship. Right?”
He stared at her with a narrowed gaze. “Wrong,” he said firmly. “I’m not the least bit sorry I kissed you. Surprised, maybe, and hoping you don’t think I was trying to take advantage of you. But definitely not sorry.”
“You’re not?”
“Heaven knows, I didn’t mean for it to happen like that, but it’s probably just as well. It makes the next thing I want to say easier.”
She was confused again. Had she missed something? “The next thing? Which is…?”
“Which is,” he said slowly, drawing the word out in his deep, low voice, “that I’ve figured out what you should do.”
He walked slowly toward her, and Maura felt her heartbeat quicken at the strange, unsettling light in his eye. Inner warning bells sounded. She couldn’t put her finger on it, but she felt something was about to happen to her.
Something momentous and totally unexpected.
He was standing right in front of her now, his muscular arms crossed over his broad chest. She had to tilt her head back to look up at him. Her mouth felt dry as she started to speak.
“And what do you think that is?” she asked in a halting tone.
“Simple.” His low, commanding tone gave her chills. “Marry me.”
“Marry you?” Maura wasn’t sure she’d heard him correctly. She couldn’t believe he was proposing to her.
“That’s what I said. I’m asking you to marry me,” he repeated patiently, holding her wide-eyed gaze.
“But how can I marry you?” She knew the question sounded silly as soon as she spoke the words, but she was too stunned to edit her reaction. “I mean, our relationship…we’re just friends. I can’t just marry you.”
She saw him blink, yet his expression showed no other reaction. She unconsciously bit her lip and looked away.
“A husband and wife should be friends,” he replied smoothly. “Don’t you think?”
“Of course I do. It’s just that there has to be something more to it.”
“Like love, you mean?” His deep voice held an uncharacteristically cynical note. “Let me tell you something, Maura. People get married every day thinking they’re totally, wildly, unbelievably in love. And more than half of them end up having rotten marriages.”
“Yes,” she said quietly. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’m sure that’s true.”
He was referring to his own failed marriage, no doubt, and she was curious to hear more. Yet she could tell it was still a painful topic and she didn’t think it was the time to ask him about it.
“I know you think this sounds crazy,” he continued. “I thought the same, too, when I first had the idea. But I’ve had some time to think it through while you were dozing,” he gently teased her. “I know this could work. I feel it in my gut. I respect you. I care for you. We share the same values and understand the demands of the kind of work we both do. We both love children. And you even laugh at my bad jokes,” he added with a smile.
“Only because I don’t want to hurt your feelings. I know how thin-skinned doctors can be,” she returned with a grin.
He laughed, and she met his warm gaze.
He really was so handsome. Even more so than usual right now, with that persuasive, hopeful expression on his face. And she knew that he was a decent man. Kind, even noble. Intelligent and successful, as well.
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Kate Little
Maura Chambers needed help with her unborn baby. Doug Connelly wanted to make up for a friend's bad judgment. Not the best reasons for marriage, but enough to make Maura and Doug say "I do."It was to be a marriage of convenience, to get Maura through a difficult time. But how, then, could she explain the hungry look in Doug's amber eyes, the longing she felt during their nights together? The handsome doctor's hands made her feel nothing like a plain Jane nurse but rather like a wanton, wanted woman. Everything was within reach–a husband, a family. Until she discovered Doug's little secret…
AROUND CHI-TOWN
May: It’s wedding bells once again for the Connellys. This time, they’re ringing for the newest member of Chicago’s “royal family”—Dr. Doug Connelly. In a private ceremony downtown, he wed nurse Maura Chambers. Kudos to her for landing Chicago’s best-looking pediatrician since George Clooney’s Dr. Ross.
It was just a short while ago that patriarch Grant Connelly was reunited with his long-lost illegitimate sons, twins Doug and Chance Barnett. The latter, a Navy SEAL, is reported to be off on yet another secret mission.
Not even the presence of two more powerful Connelly men could prevent a near-disaster at Connelly Corporation last night when a computer crash nearly wiped out the giant’s software. A company spokesman said they’re not ruling out sabotage.
With his meteoric rise to the top of the American business scene and his beautiful, former-princess wife, Grant must surely be the target of the green-eyed monster. But exactly who has it in for the well-respected Chicago icon?
Dear Reader,
Looking for romances with a healthy dose of passion? Don’t miss Silhouette Desire’s red-hot May lineup of passionate, powerful and provocative love stories!
Start with our MAN OF THE MONTH, His Majesty, M.D., by bestselling author Leanne Banks. This latest title in the ROYAL DUMONTS miniseries features an explosive engagement of convenience between a reluctant royal and a determined heiress. Then, in Kate Little’s Plain Jane & Doctor Dad, the new installment of Desire’s continuity series DYNASTIES: THE CONNELLYS, a rugged Connelly sweeps a pregnant heroine off her feet.
A brooding cowboy learns about love and family in Taming Blackhawk, a SECRETS! title by Barbara McCauley. Reader favorite Sara Orwig offers a brand-new title in the exciting TEXAS CATTLEMAN’S CLUB: THE LAST BACHELOR series. In The Playboy Meets His Match, enemies become lovers and then some.
A sexy single mom is partnered with a lonesome rancher in Kathie DeNosky’s Cassie’s Cowboy Daddy. And in Anne Marie Winston’s Billionaire Bachelors: Garrett, sparks fly when a tycoon shares a cabin with the woman he believes was his stepfather’s mistress.
Bring passion into your life this month by indulging in all six of these sensual sizzlers.
Enjoy!
Joan Marlow Golan
Senior Editor, Silhouette Desire
Plain Jane & Doctor Dad
Kate Little
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
KATE LITTLE
claims to have lots of experience with romance—“the fictional kind, that is,” she is quick to clarify. She has been both an author and an editor of romance fiction for over fifteen years. She believes that a good romance will make the reader experience all the tension, thrills and agony of falling madly, deeply and wildly in love. She enjoys watching the characters in her books go crazy for each other, but hates to see the blissful couple disappear when it’s time for them to live happily ever after. In addition to writing romance novels, Kate also writes fiction and nonfiction for young adults. She lives on Long Island, New York, with her husband and daughter.
MEET THE CONNELLYS
Meet the Connellys of Chicago—wealthy, powerful and rocked by scandal, betrayal…and passion!
Who’s Who in PLAIN JANE & DOCTOR DAD
Dr. Doug Connelly—Within months, he found his long-lost father, Grant Connelly, and a family-to-be with pregnant Maura. But can the divorced doctor let them into his barricaded heart?
Maura Chambers—Though pregnant and alone, she vowed to give her baby everything—everything but a father. Then Doug offered his name…. Dare Maura hope for more?
Angie Donahue—Years ago she loved Grant Connelly and gave him a child…. Now she’s back—not for a reunion, but for revenge.
Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
One
As Nurse Maura Chambers left Scott’s office, she knew she’d never see him again. But he didn’t say “Good luck” or even “Good-bye.” He merely shuffled papers around on his desk as she slipped through the doorway, ignoring her, as if she had already vanished from his sight.
She stepped from the quiet chamber into the busy hospital corridor, resisting the urge to give his door one last, resounding slam. What good would that do her now? It would only give the major-league gossips on staff more to talk about. Hadn’t they already gotten enough mileage out of her failed romance? Anyway, in a matter of days Scott would be gone for good, starting a new job and a new life hundreds of miles away. And she’d be free of him. Almost.
Maura took a deep breath and started down the crowded hallway, willing herself to look as busy as everyone around her. She kept her gaze downcast, avoiding eye contact with anyone who might stop her to ask why she looked so upset. She didn’t feel like talking about her problems now. Not to anyone.
As much as she’d dreaded facing Scott Walker again, she’d been obligated to disclose her secret. After all, he bore his fair share of responsibility. But it only took a moment for Maura to realize Scott didn’t see the matter that way. Not at all. His reaction had been more than disappointing. More than cold or unsympathetic. His attitude and succinct advice had made her sick to her stomach.
Well, what did you really expect? she asked herself. Haven’t you known for weeks now what kind of man he is? It had been clear to her ever since the night Scott had announced, out of the blue, that he was leaving Chicago General. Leaving the city entirely for a new job as a hospital administrator in Minneapolis. Why would he be any different now?
Looking back, she felt angry all over again to see his calculated tactics so clearly. How he had chosen a fancy restaurant for their talk, a place so exclusive and formal he could almost be assured she wouldn’t make a scene. As the maître d’ had led them to their secluded, candle-lit table, Maura had thought Scott might even be planning to propose.
He had a little speech planned for her, all right, but it wasn’t about marriage. Quite the opposite. Getting to know her the past six months had been great. Really fun, he’d said in a sympathetic tone. But the problem was, he’d be moving to Minnesota in a few weeks. He’d found a great job. Just what he’d been hoping for. She wouldn’t want to hold him back, would she? Besides, they both knew this was a casual relationship. No strings. No expectations.
Then, ignoring her stunned expression, he’d patted her hand. Long-distance things never seemed to work out, he’d added, so it was best for both of them to end it now. To make a clean break. In a few weeks, he was sure, she’d thank him for making it so easy. She’d be happy she was free to meet someone new.
He hadn’t waited for her answer. She was far too shocked at the time to make any reply at all.
It was right at that moment that she suddenly saw Scott differently, saw his true nature clearly. How had she been so blind? Was he that adept at misleading people? While she thought they were involved in a serious relationship—one that could lead to marriage—he’d merely been using her.
Maura felt a bitter taste at the memory. She touched her fingers to her eyes. She was crying. It seemed impossible that she had any tears left after the way she’d cried that night. She stopped walking and leaned against the wall of the corridor. Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she reached into her pocket for a tissue.
“Maura?” She felt a touch on her shoulder and turned to see Doug Connelly’s tall, commanding form beside her. “Are you all right?” he asked kindly.
“Uh…sure. I’ve just got something in my eye. A bit of dust or something,” Maura mumbled. She pressed the tissue to her eye. “It will go away in a second.”
“Here, let me see,” Doug offered.
“No, really…it’s okay,” Maura murmured. But before she could resist, he took her chin in his gentle grasp and turned her face up to the light.
His touch was firm but light, as she expected. He was a pediatric cardiologist, adept at putting his small patients at ease. His questioning gaze considered her troubled expression and she was sure he could see now that she’d lied to him. She was upset and crying, pure and simple.
“It looks as if it might be gone,” he said quietly. His hand dropped away, but he continued to gaze down at her, his warm, amber eyes filled with concern.
They stood in a section of the hallway that was mostly glass, offering a courtyard view filled with trees, flowers and benches. Visitors and patients used it mainly, but some of the staff were outside, too, stealing a few minutes from their demanding jobs.
“What a day,” Doug said. “Sometimes in this city, you feel like winter will never end. Then all of a sudden—bam. You look up and it’s spring.”
“Yes, spring did come suddenly this year.” Maura looked out at the trees and flowers in full bloom. She’d been so depressed and distracted the past few weeks, she’d hardly noticed the changes.
“Let’s get some fresh air. You look like you could use it.” Doug took her arm without waiting for her reply.
“Thanks, but I really have to get back to the floor.” Maura glanced at her watch, trying to excuse herself.
But Doug wouldn’t let her leave his side so easily. “You can take a break for a few minutes, Maura. We’ll cut across the courtyard and you can catch the elevators on the other side. That’s closer to your station, anyway.”
Before Maura knew it, they were outside, walking down a tree-lined path. She felt the sunshine on her skin and inhaled the soft spring air. Doug had been right: she felt better almost instantly.
She glanced at his rugged profile and tall, lean form. He walked with his hands tucked into the pockets of his blue lab coat, his ever-present stethoscope slung around his neck, clearly enjoying a break in his hectic schedule. She had worked with many keenly intelligent doctors and many dedicated ones, as well, but she’d rarely met a physician who possessed both qualities in such abundance. Doug was more than dedicated. He was known as a bit of a workaholic, but he was an excellent physician. Maura was sure she knew none better. His powers of concentration and focus seemed evident even now, in his thoughtful expression and the firm set of his handsome features.
They strolled along in silence, side by side, but it was a comfortable silence for Maura. She had first come to know Doug as a colleague, when she’d been caring for one of his patients. After that, they’d quickly become friends. Especially after learning that Doug and Scott had gone to college together and had once been good friends. They’d been out of touch for years and had met again recently, when Scott came to work at Chicago General.
She often wondered how much Doug knew about her relationship with Scott and how close the two men were now. Scott always claimed he liked Doug, but often made cutting remarks about him. Maura could see Scott was simply jealous. He had once hoped to be a doctor, too, but had dropped out of medical school his first year. The same school from which Doug had graduated with honors.
While she wouldn’t consider Doug a close friend, she had always felt a subtle but very strong connection to him. From the start they’d been able to talk to each other in an open, honest way. Which was quite unusual for Maura. She had always been shy with men, especially one so good-looking. But she rarely felt awkward with him. Something about him just put her at ease.
“Sit a minute,” Doug suggested as they came to an empty bench.
“Sure.” Maura shrugged and sat down. The bench was in the shade, facing a small fountain surrounded by flowers. The sound of the rippling water soothed her frazzled nerves, as did Doug’s quiet, solid presence.
“Maura, what is it? What’s troubling you?” Doug asked finally.
She turned to look at him. “What do you mean?”
“I know you were crying back there. And you look pale as a sheet.”
Maura felt suddenly self-conscious under his scrutiny. She pushed a strand of wavy hair away from her face.
“I’m fine…I mean, I feel a little under the weather today. Just tired, I guess.”
“Yes, you do look tired. You work too hard.”
“Probably.” She knew it was more like crying too hard—and sleeping too little.
Doug was quiet again for a moment. Then he said, “Is this about Scott? Are you upset because he’s leaving on Friday?”
“No. Not at all.” She shook her head.
That was what everyone must think, she realized. That she was still yearning after a man who had treated her so badly. “Relieved is more like it,” she added. “I wish he was already gone.”
“He didn’t deserve you.” Doug’s tone was firm and deep.
“That’s nice of you to say,” Maura replied quietly.
“I wasn’t saying it to be nice. It’s the truth.” He paused, as if uncertain whether to continue. Then he said, “I know it feels awful, right now. But give it time. Before you know it, you’ll forget all about him.” He leaned toward her. “Maybe you should take some time off, get away for a while,” he suggested.
“Yes, maybe I should,” she replied vaguely. Last night she had thought about visiting her sister on the West Coast, the only real family she had left. But she knew very well that no matter how fast or how far she ran, she could never escape this problem.
She turned and looked at him and could see he was sincerely worried about her. The look in his eye, the sheer kindness and consideration, was her undoing. She had been on an emotional roller coaster the past twenty-four hours, and having Doug, of all people, look at her that way made her feel as if she was about to burst into tears again.
She felt the moisture well up in her eyes and dropped her face into her hands. Then she felt Doug’s strong arm circle her shoulders as hot tears streamed down her cheeks. Doug pulled her closer, his grip strong and warm around her, his chest firm under her cheek. She was crying hard, sobbing uncontrollably, unable to stop herself.
“It’s okay,” she heard him murmur against her hair.
She tried to speak and felt a giant lump in her throat again. No, it’s not okay, she wanted to say. It’s anything but.
“Just cry if you need to,” Doug whispered.
“Oh, Doug…I’m sorry. I just don’t know what to do….”
Her voice trailed off in another wave of tears and she pressed her face against his hard chest.
She felt Doug’s strong hand stroking her hair. She felt the warmth of his body and breathed in the scent of his skin. With her eyes closed and her cheek nestled in the crook of his shoulder, she felt safe and protected. For the briefest moment, Maura allowed herself the lovely fantasy that she could stay this way forever. How much easier everything would be.
But that was impossible. She had to pull herself together. There was no one to help her out of this mess. Doug might offer his strong shoulder to cry on, but he didn’t have a white charger standing by for a quick getaway. He was only trying to be a good friend.
She took a deep breath and forced herself to move away from his embrace.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you by talking about Scott,” Doug apologized.
“It wasn’t that.” She wiped her eyes and took a shaky breath. She felt him watching her, waiting for her to speak.
Finally, she said, “It’s just that I have this problem….” She paused again and staring straight ahead, she admitted, “I’m pregnant.”
She wasn’t sure why she’d told him. The words spoken aloud sounded so final. So overwhelming. Doug looked shocked for an instant. Then he quickly hid his reaction, she noticed. He was silent for a long moment, and she watched as his pensive expression grew harsher. Angrier.
“With Scott’s child,” he said.
Though it wasn’t a question, she nodded and looked away again.
He leaned forward and pushed his hand through his thick hair. “Does he know?”
“I told him a few minutes ago. In his office. That’s why I looked upset in the hall,” she admitted.
“He didn’t take the news very well, I guess,” Doug replied sternly.
“No. He didn’t.”
The ugly scene replayed in her mind, and suddenly she couldn’t bear talking about it anymore.
“Listen, thanks for talking to me,” she said as she stood to go. “But I’d better get back to work. I’ve already been gone way too long.”
“I understand.” He nodded and came to his feet. “Maybe I’ll see you later, when I do rounds.”
“Sure. And I’m sorry for crying all over you.” He must see her as some kind of flailing, helpless female, she thought, when in fact, she was just the opposite.
“Don’t even think about it, Maura.” His tone was soft and sincere. Maura met his gaze briefly, then turned on her way.
She hurried across the courtyard, then entered the hospital. To avoid the long wait for the elevator, she walked up three flights to the pediatrics department. Her supervisor, Gloria Jones, greeted her with a questioning look but didn’t ask why she was so late returning from her break. There was plenty of work waiting, and Maura dug in, eager to focus on her patients instead of her problems.
As the afternoon passed, her thoughts returned to her disturbing confrontation with Scott—and her conversation with Dr. Connelly. She’d never had such a personal conversation with Doug before. But now she was thankful that, purely by chance, he’d been there for her at such an awful moment. Crying on his shoulder hadn’t solved anything, but it had made her feel worlds better, lending her the boost she needed to carry on.
Some of the staff disliked the handsome pediatrician. They found him aloof and distant. But Maura had never felt that way. He was sometimes distracted by his work, and even brooding. But a more dedicated doctor would be hard to find.
She had never imagined he would also be such a dedicated friend, the kind you could really count on when things went haywire. But whether you liked Doug Connelly or not, he was clearly a man of strong character, and Maura knew without question that her secret was safe.
Her workday wore on, thankfully free of pressing emergencies, as she had a pounding headache that wasn’t assuaged by the pills she’d taken earlier. Luckily, a night-shift nurse came in early, allowing Maura to go home.
She lived in a comfortable family neighborhood a short distance from the hospital. She’d been lucky to find a reasonably priced two-bedroom apartment in a renovated brownstone. Her living room even had a working fireplace, which she really appreciated during the long Chicago winters.
The apartment was the first she’d lived in without a roommate, and Maura had loved decorating it to her own taste. She liked antiques, but since she could only afford a few small pieces, she used her knack for finding interesting items that weren’t genuine antiques but still quaint and unique. The honey-tone wood floors were covered by area rugs, and the walls were warm shades of apricot and creamy white. Her home was her haven, her retreat from her hectic, demanding job. It was a private place where she could rest and recharge. Where she could hide away and sort out her thoughts when life tossed her some seemingly impossible crisis. Which was just the way she felt tonight as she slipped her key into the front door and went inside.
She dropped her mail on a table in the foyer without even glancing at it, then went straight to the bedroom and took a long, hot shower. Even though it was still early, she put on her nightgown and robe, then lay down on her bed, hoping to sleep. But worries immediately crowded her mind.
For some reason, instead of thinking about Scott, she thought about Doug, recalling the first time they’d met, months ago. She had recently started at the hospital and had been working the night shift. She was assigned to one of his patients, a four-year-old girl brought in with advanced pneumonia and serious heart complications. Purely by chance in the small hours of the night she’d discovered that the child was in serious trouble, in danger of heart failure.
When Doug found her with the patient minutes later, she was giving CPR as she waited for the crash cart and respiratory equipment to be hooked up. As Doug took charge, he barely said a personal word to her, but the respectful, grateful look in his eyes said it all.
That night she’d hardly been aware of his compelling good looks, or the smothering shyness that typically fell over her. Working through the crisis with him, she felt totally in synch, and the event somehow forged a mysterious but deep bond between them. She had never felt quite that way about anyone—not a coworker or even a romantic partner. But she had felt it that night with Doug, and forever after.
They had worked together for several hours to pull the little girl through. Even after Maura’s regular shift was done, she stayed on, unwilling to leave until she was sure the child was going to survive. She knew that some people thought it unwise to get so involved with each patient’s recovery. They advised compassion tempered by a cooler, more distant attitude to avoid the burnout that was so common among overworked nurses.
But Maura wasn’t made that way. She hadn’t become a pediatric nurse in order to be distant and detached from the children who needed her. She knew from the first that Doug was the same. Perhaps even more intensely involved with his young patients than she.
She later learned that the little girl’s family didn’t have much insurance and Doug had not even sent them a bill. While it was highly uncommon for a specialist of Doug’s caliber to forego payment, she soon learned that it wasn’t uncommon at all for him to work that way.
When morning came and the crisis had passed, she and Doug sat together outside on a bench in the same courtyard where they had talked today. They celebrated their victory, joking and laughing over cups of steaming coffee and sticky donuts. It was late January and the weather was frigid, yet she could still recall feeling elated by the cold air and early-morning light and the shared success in saving a child’s life.
It was then Doug learned she was dating Scott Walker, and Maura learned Doug was Scott’s old pal from college. There was something in Doug’s reaction to the news that made Maura think he was disappointed to hear she was seeing someone. But the moment passed and later she decided she’d imagined the brief flicker of interest.
On her side Maura would never deny that she found Doug very attractive. But at that time she had felt so committed to Scott, she’d never once thought of Doug in a romantic way.
Besides, Maura reflected, even if she had been free, Doug was not her type at all. For one thing, she was looking for a man who would have time in his life for a wife and family. Doug was far too focused on his work to make family life, or even a romantic relationship, a priority.
And he could be temperamental at times. She had to acknowledge that his smiles and bright moods were rare. He seemed most often to be shadowed by some deep, mysterious unhappiness, and too often she found a dark, brooding look in his eyes when he thought no one was watching him.
What brought on that somber mood of his? Was it the pressures of his work? Maura had always suspected it was something more. Some deep hurt in his past, some painful loss. Doug had never spoken to her about his past, but she did know from Scott that he’d gone through a difficult divorce a few years back.
As the months passed, she and Doug always had so much to say to each other whenever they met. She’d run into him on her floor while he did rounds, in the hallways, in the cafeteria. He would ask her advice about his cases, and she enjoyed helping him figure out some knotty problem in a diagnosis or discuss a curious turn in a patient’s condition.
It was unusual for a doctor of his standing to take a nurse into his confidence in that way, and she was secretly pleased, even proud, of the way he seemed to value her observations. But they didn’t only talk about patients. They talked about all kinds of things, movies, books, traveling to exotic places, which they both planned on doing someday when they weren’t working so hard.
But Maura had to acknowledge that, for all their interesting conversations, she still knew very little about him. The staff at Chicago General was always brimming with gossip, and while she avoided discussing other people’s lives, she had overheard a few basic facts about Doug. He had been at the hospital since his residency and at one time had been married. He was divorced for almost two years, but no one seemed to know what had gone wrong. His ex-wife was now married to a prominent plastic surgeon, and some said she’d hurt Doug badly with an affair.
Even though she didn’t have romantic designs on him herself, Maura wondered why he wasn’t in a new relationship, or even married again, by now. But her knowledgeable co-workers answered that question, too. Many hopeful women had pursued the handsome doctor, but the relationship had always ended unhappily. Despite his giving, caring nature as a physician, it was reported that Dr. Douglas Connelly was distant and even difficult as a romantic partner. An emotional Mount Everest with wickedly icy heights to scale.
Maura suspected his single-minded focus on his work had been the real problem. She knew it would be one for her. Some people didn’t need a home life and family. Maybe Doug was that type, she concluded. But a home and family was something Maura had always longed for, because she’d known so little security growing up.
When she’d met Scott, back in November, she’d believed at last she’d found a man who shared her values and outlook and wanted the same kind of life that she did.
Her thoughts drifted as sleep overcame her weary mind. How devastating it had been to discover that Scott had only pretended to be that kind of man, saying just what she’d wanted to hear in order to get what he’d wanted from her.
And by the time she saw him clearly, it was too late.
Two
Maura woke to the sound of sharp knocking on her front door. Her bedroom was dark, and the clock on the night table showed it was nearly eight. She sat up and pushed her hair back with her hand as she walked toward the foyer.
She wondered who it could be. Maybe her friend Liza, who lived downstairs. Liza often stopped by at night just to chat, mostly about her problems with boyfriends.
But Maura wasn’t in the mood to see Liza. She walked toward the door and tightened the sash on her robe, wondering what excuse she could make.
Just as the knock sounded again, Maura turned the lock. “Just a second,” she said.
She pulled the door open a space. Then felt herself jolted to the core by the sight of Doug’s tall, imposing form.
“Doug. What are you doing here?”
She was rarely so blunt, but he was that last person she’d expected. He’d only been to her apartment once, when her car wouldn’t start and he’d given her a lift home from the hospital. She didn’t even realize he remembered where she lived.
“I was on my way home and thought I’d stop by. I went to your station after my rounds, but they said you’d left early,” he added. “I hope you’re all right.”
He smiled at her, yet his gaze looked serious, questioning, as if he wasn’t sure he’d done the right thing by surprising her like this.
“Another nurse came in early, so I was able to leave before the shift ended,” she explained. “I was just taking a nap.”
“Have you had dinner yet? We could get something at the café around the corner if you like.”
“Thanks, but I think I’d rather stay in tonight. I mean, I appreciate you stopping over—”
“That’s all right. But I did want to talk to you some more. You seemed so upset today. I’m not sure it’s good for you to be alone.”
“I-I’m okay,” she insisted. “Really.” But she wasn’t okay and they both knew it.
“Maura?” Doug moved up to the opening in the door, his tone firm but concerned. “Please, let me in. I’ll only stay a minute.”
She took a deep breath. Then, without saying anything more, she stepped back and let him in. He was probably right. It wasn’t good for her to be alone right now. She might feel better if she talked to him for a while. He knew Scott and he seemed so understanding about her problem. Maybe he could help her sort things out.
She closed the door and they stood facing each other. A small lamp on a side table cast the foyer in soft, golden light. Shadows emphasized his strong features, his wide, firm mouth and amber eyes.
She suddenly felt self-conscious dressed in just her bathrobe, but there was no help for it. She knew she looked a mess, her hair hanging in wild waves down past her shoulders and her eyes circled with shadows. She met his steady gaze, then looked away, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.
“I know you’re tired. I won’t stay long,” he promised.
“It’s okay. I’m glad you’re here.” It was true, she realized. She met his gaze, then looked away. “Let’s go into the living room.”
She led the way and sat on the couch. Doug stood a short distance away, his brows drawn together in a frown. She suddenly wondered about the thoughts causing that dark look. Did he think badly of her, that she was not very particular or careful about her romantic partners? The irony was, if anything, it was her naiveté and lack of experience with men that had gotten her into this fix. But of course Doug wouldn’t know that, and she felt foolish trying to explain it to him, certain he’d think she was making excuses for herself.
Doug turned and sat down in the armchair across from her. “You never really told me what Scott said to you about the baby. Only that he reacted badly.”
She sighed and gripped her hands in her lap. “We didn’t part on the best terms. I basically haven’t spoken to him since he broke up with me and announced he was leaving for Minnesota. When I went to see him today, to tell him about the baby, he offered to pay for an abortion…but that was all.”
“That bastard.” Doug’s eyes glinted with anger. “Is that all he said to you? He didn’t say he’d help you through the pregnancy or support his own child?”
Maura had wanted to avoid relating the uglier details of the conversation, but now she decided to tell Doug all.
“No, just the opposite, actually. He said that if I had the child, it would be my responsibility and I’d have to take him to court before he’d share in any financial support. He also said he hoped I wouldn’t make a big deal out of this. It would be bad for my career and for his, and he hoped that I’d…I’d be smart and do the right thing.”
“He said that?” Doug rose to his feet, his fists balled as if he wanted to strike something or someone. “I’d like to do the right thing to him…that smug, self-righteous son of a—”
Maura had never seen Doug this angry. His powerful emotions frightened her. Was it due to some long-standing enmity or rivalry between him and Scott? A tension Scott had sometimes hinted about. Or was he simply angry on her behalf?
“Doug, please. I really don’t care if Scott’s involved. I did believe I was in love with him at one time,” she admitted, “but now I can see I was in some fantasyland. I never really knew him.”
Doug turned to her again, and she thought her words had taken some of the edge off his anger.
“I was shocked at first by his reaction,” she continued. “But maybe it’s a good thing that he wants no connection to me or the baby. With any luck I’ll never have anything to do with him again.”
He paced across the room, then suddenly turned to face her.
“Yes, I guess you’re right. You’re certainly better off without him,” he admitted in a calmer tone. “And my confronting him wouldn’t help matters, would it?”
“Not at all,” she assured him.
“Except to make me feel a hell of a lot better,” he added, more to himself than to Maura. He took a deep breath and she could see him willing himself to cool off.
“Sorry, Maura. This doesn’t help you any.” He shook his head then glanced down at her. “Have you decided what you’re going to do?”
He’d asked the question quietly, almost casually. Yet she sensed him focusing on her reply with laser-like intensity. Not just the way a friend would be interested, but as if the matter somehow affected him directly, as well.
“I want to keep my baby,” she said firmly. “I have to.”
“I knew you would say that.” Doug’s expression softened, and a warm light glowed in his eyes as he gazed at her. “But raising a child on your own will be hard. Harder than you think,” he said knowingly. “My mother was a single parent. She didn’t even have family to help her. She really did it all on her own. With twin boys, no less,” he added. “Until I was an adult, I never even understood or appreciated how much she had to deal with. Sometimes I know I can never fully appreciate it, either.”
Maura had not known that Doug had been raised only by his mother. It couldn’t have been easy for him growing up. The accomplishment of completing medical school seemed even more impressive now. He was right. It wouldn’t be an easy road for her or her child.
“I know what you’re saying. I’ve thought about this—the problems I’ll face. But I can’t see it any other way. I just can’t put the child up for adoption,” she added. It was hard to continue, but she forced herself. Now it was her turn to reveal some hidden part of her history. “I know what it’s like to be part of a family…but not really part of it. It’s a terrible, lonely feeling. Like you’re always on the outside looking in,” she added quietly, remembering unhappier times.
“I’d rather raise my child alone and give it all the love one parent can give than sit and wonder, every day, if my baby is happy and cared for.”
“You were adopted?” he asked.
She shook her head. “A foster child, from the time I was about twelve years old. Both my parents died in a car accident. My sister and I had no close relatives to raise us. We were split up and sent to different foster homes. Some of the people were nice to me. They wanted to help and tried to make me feel a part of their family. But there were always problems. I never stayed anywhere for very long,” she confided wistfully. “Then I managed to get a scholarship to college and started living on my own.”
“How sad to lose both your parents so young,” he said gravely. “At least I always had my mother and brother. You never mentioned your family before. I had no idea.”
“Yes, well, you never mentioned yours either,” she said. “We’ve never talked much about personal things like this before, have we?”
“No, we haven’t. But maybe it’s long past time that we did.”
He glanced at her briefly as he sat down on the other end of the couch, crossing one long leg over the other and stretching out his arm along the back of the sofa. Despite his size, he moved gracefully, Maura noticed, with a powerful masculine grace that was distracting to her.
“Considering all you’ve been through, Maura, I’d think you would have turned out differently somehow.”
“Differently? How do you mean?”
“I’m not sure exactly. Not nearly as optimistic for one thing. And you’re such a caring, giving person.”
His thoughtful words lifted her spirits and, more than that, made her remember who she was and what she was capable of.
“I had a good start, I guess. I had two parents who loved their children and loved each other. We lived in a small town in Wisconsin, just outside of Madison. It was really an ideal childhood, you might say.” She looked down for a moment and gathered her thoughts. “Sometimes when I think about my family life back then, I think it might be unfair to the baby to raise it on my own. I know that there are decent, good people out there who would give an adopted child lots of love and a wonderful home. And sometimes I do feel scared to do this on my own.”
She felt her throat tighten with emotion, making it hard to continue. She didn’t want to start crying again but felt the tears well up in her eyes. “I don’t know…I just feel so confused, so overwhelmed,” she admitted in a shaky voice.
Doug touched her shoulder. He seemed about to speak, then stopped himself. She could see he was giving her a moment to calm herself and collect her thoughts again.
It was still hard for Maura to believe she was pregnant.
How could she begin to explain it to Doug, when she herself hardly understood how this happened? To her, of all people? She’d always felt that physical intimacy between a man and a woman was a serious step, part of a relationship that included love and commitment. Even so, she had little experience that way and had always been so careful.
But Scott had had a way of sweeping aside her doubts and Maura had believed that she loved him. She had thought herself so lucky that a successful, good-looking man like Scott had wanted her. She couldn’t understand what had attracted him to a mousy little thing like her. She couldn’t help it, but that was how she thought of herself. She knew she wasn’t attractive and sexy like some of the women around the hospital. She was quite the opposite, the type people used to call a plain Jane, feeling most comfortable when she blended into the woodwork. Sometimes friends like Liza insisted that she had what it took to turn heads, if she would only play up her looks a bit. But Maura always thought they were just trying to be nice. She could never quite believe it.
Maybe she felt safer downplaying her looks. As a teenager, just starting to blossom, she’d had some bad experiences attracting the wrong kind of male attention—the clumsy and crass advances of boys and even adult men in her foster families. She had learned to put as little emphasis as possible on her appearance. In her heart she hoped that the right man would be attracted to what was inside, not to some pretty packaging.
That was part of the reason she thought Scott might be the right man for her. Plain Jane or not, Scott pursued her and wooed her, and she was very flattered by his attentions. While he sometimes acted thoughtlessly in a way that was hurtful to her, he always managed to win her back again. It was hard to stay mad at him when he turned on the charm.
She knew he had his faults. But didn’t everybody? Maura didn’t expect the man she married to be perfect. She had so little experience when it came to romance that she hardly knew what to expect. No wonder she now found herself in this situation.
She shook her head as if to clear her muddled thoughts, then glanced over at Doug. Their eyes met, his golden gaze full of concern for her. For her future and her baby’s, she thought.
She unconsciously touched her hand to her stomach, which was still perfectly flat. Yet she imagined the new life growing there, minute by minute, hour by hour.
“I’ve been thinking I might leave Chicago. It’s hard to raise a child here.”
“Leave Chicago?” Doug’s expression darkened. “Where would you go?”
“Maybe to Portland, to be near my sister, Ellen. Or maybe to Santa Fe. I have a good friend from school there. I might be better off someplace new, making a fresh start.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea at all, Maura,” Doug said sternly. He abruptly got up off the couch and paced across the room again, looking almost as disturbed as he’d been hearing about her talk with Scott.
“It’ll be difficult and stressful to start a new job and get settled in a new city,” he pointed out. “What if the pregnancy doesn’t go well? You’d be all alone, with no one to help you.”
But she was all alone now, here in Chicago, Maura wanted to say. But she didn’t want Doug to think she felt sorry for herself. She really didn’t.
“I’m confused, I guess. What do you think I should do?” she asked, her eyes wide and questioning.
He stared at her a long time, making Maura feel suddenly very aware of being alone with him. She thought he was about to say something, then saw the firm set of his mouth as he mentally backtracked.
“I think there’s a lot to sort out. But it sounds like you’ve made the most important decision of all. To keep the baby,” he said. He sat down on the couch again next to her, their bodies close but not touching. “I’m not sure you can figure out much more tonight.”
He was right. She was exhausted and it was hard to think clearly.
“I guess you’re right. I can’t figure out my entire future in five minutes.” She sighed and glanced over at him. “But thanks again for listening. It’s really helped me,” she said sincerely.
“I want to help you any way I can, Maura. I mean it,” he promised her.
The emotion in his voice surprised her, and before she could answer, he shifted over on the couch, closing the small space between them. He put his arm around her shoulder and held her close.
His nearness was a soothing balm to her soul. They didn’t talk for a few moments, and Maura allowed herself to simply relax and soak up the strength and comfort he offered.
After a time she said, “What really made you come here tonight?”
“Just what I said when I came in, I was worried about you and thought you could use some company.”
She honestly hadn’t realized that Doug thought about her as much as he apparently did. Maybe he didn’t think of her in a romantic way, but their relationship did seem to matter to him, she reflected.
Then he shifted and glanced down at her and she knew intuitively there was something more. Something he was reluctant to say.
“Look, I know this sounds crazy, but I feel like this is partly my fault. This problem of yours, I mean.” She felt his broad chest expand as he took a deep breath. “I’ve known Scott a very long time. I know how he treats women. I wasn’t surprised at all when I heard about the way he broke up with you,” he admitted. “Months ago, when I first met you and learned you were seeing him, I thought about saying something to you. To warn you in some way about him. But I didn’t want to interfere. I could see you really cared for him and he seemed to care for you. You seemed happy together,” he added, sounding almost angry to admit it, Maura noticed. Though she couldn’t understand why.
“Was I happy? Yes, at first I guess I was,” she agreed. “Until I really got to know him.”
“I’d hoped that maybe you would figure him out sooner than most, and get through it without any serious damage. But it didn’t turn out that way, I guess,” Doug said. “Does it bother you to hear these things about him?” he added.
Maura shook her head. “No, not at all. In a strange way it makes me feel better. When Scott broke up with me, I felt it was all my fault. As if there was some reason I couldn’t make him love me and want to stay with me. Now I can see that it wasn’t me at all.”
“No, not you at all, Maura. Scott would have been lucky beyond deserving if he’d made a commitment to you,” Doug assured her. “Still, I feel responsible for how things ended up. If I had told you about Scott, about his past, maybe this would never have happened.”
Maura was stunned by his line of reasoning. She pulled back and stared up at him. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’d never make that connection in a million years.”
“I know you don’t see it that way. But I do,” he argued. “I knew you were too good for him. I knew how he’d end things with you. Just like all the others. I should have warned you.”
“Even if you had, I wouldn’t have believed you or taken your advice to heart,” Maura replied honestly. “I really thought we were in love and that Scott wanted to marry me someday.”
“Maybe you wouldn’t have listened to me. Not at first. But it might have helped you see his true colors sooner,” he added somberly.
Maura met his gaze. Perhaps that was true. But what good did it do to wonder about that now? She had to deal with the present and figure out some plan for the future.
“It doesn’t matter. Let’s not argue about it,” she urged him. “The point is, I’m the only one responsible for dating Scott…and for everything that happened after.”
She rose abruptly, then instantly felt her head spin. Doug was beside her in a split second, his arm wrapped tightly around her waist.
“Maura, are you dizzy?”
“Just a little. I haven’t eaten much today,” she realized. “That must be it.”
He piled up some couch pillows so she could lie back comfortably. “Here, rest a minute. I’ll fix you something.”
“You don’t have to do that,” she said. “I can manage.”
“I said rest,” he ordered in a stern tone. “I’m the doctor, remember?”
When she looked up at him in surprise, he flashed a sexy, stubborn grin.
“Okay, okay. You win.” She sat back with a sigh and a small smile. “I didn’t know you could cook, Dr. Connelly,” she added curiously.
“Me? I’m great in the kitchen—if you like scrambled eggs and toast.”
Maura laughed for the first time in days.
“Eggs on the dry side, please. Just a little jelly on the toast,” she replied as her head sunk back into the pillows.
“You got it.” He leaned over and covered her with a throw, then strolled off to the kitchen.
Maura felt her eyes close, her scattered thoughts lulled by the sounds and tempting smells of Doug’s cooking and the powerful, calming force of his presence. For the first time in days she felt some tranquillity and some hope about the future.
Her hands floated protectively to her stomach and she thought about her baby. During all her shock and worry, the single most important element in all this had been obscured, she realized. She was honestly thrilled to be expecting a child, no matter what the circumstances.
When Doug had asked about her intentions, she hadn’t revealed half of her true feelings about the baby. The truth was she wanted this child more than anything. Becoming pregnant made her see that she was very much alone in the world. Maybe she had always wanted a child, to love and be loved by the one person in her life who would always belong to her. She had a good relationship with her sister, but Ellen lived in Portland and had a family of her own. Maura had no one truly close.
Since her parents’ tragic accident and the trauma of watching her family fall to pieces, Maura had been on a private journey, longing to return to that special place of warmth, love and security she had known as a child. She had imagined creating that kind of stable, loving home life as part of a traditional marriage. But it hadn’t happened that way. Now she had to play the cards she’d been dealt. Despite her worries and fears, in her heart she was grateful for the new life growing inside of her.
She loved her baby already and knew that she would do her utmost to give her child a good life, to give him or her all the love, security and happiness that a child deserves.
Even if she had to do it all on her own. It would work out somehow, she told herself. It would.
Eggs, milk and butter. A bowl, a frying pan and toaster. Doug easily found what he needed and set to work on Maura’s dinner. Their conversation had left him all stirred up, as emotionally scrambled as the bowl of beaten eggs in his hand, and he was glad to focus on some practical task, like cooking. He poured the eggs in the pan, then glanced out into the living room. Maura lay with her eyes closed, and he wondered if she’d fallen asleep. Just as well, he thought. She needed a break. And so did he, to sort out his thoughts about all this.
He felt bad for her, even partly responsible for the fix she was in. He truly wanted to help her, to do what he could. Doug knew that everything he’d just told Maura was true. But he also knew that there was one reaction to her news he had not disclosed. A gut response even stronger than all the rest.
He wanted a baby. He’d wanted one for a very long time. It was the real reason his marriage had fallen apart, and after that disaster his chances of being a father seemed even farther out of reach.
After his divorce, he just couldn’t seem to let any woman close enough for a serious relationship. He’d had that once, and once was enough. Romance was for movies and books, as far as he could see. People only fooled themselves into thinking those earth-shaking hormonal rushes were true love. After the tornado died down, there was only disappointment and pain.
So how would he ever be a father? Unless he got some woman pregnant by “accident,” as Scott had done to Maura. But that would never be Doug’s style.
He put two slices of bread into the toaster, then jammed it down with a bit more force than necessary. The news of Maura’s pregnancy and Scott’s reaction had felt like salt poured into an open wound. He cursed Scott for the way he’d treated her, and felt an even deeper bitterness for the way the man had turned his back on his child. Doug felt his jaw grow rigid as the anger swelled in him all over again. If a woman like Maura had come to him with news like that, it would have been the happiest day of his life. Why was life so unfair sometimes?
Doug scooped the cooked eggs onto a plate, then spread some jelly on the toast. He grabbed a fork and napkin, then headed out to the living room. But even before he reached the couch he could see that Maura was fast asleep. She looked so peaceful, as if she didn’t have a care in the world. He didn’t have the heart to wake her. Watching her sleep, he felt another wave of sympathy for her. She was such a good person. A wonderful person, truly. He really couldn’t remember knowing a woman he liked or respected more. She didn’t deserve Scott’s mistreatment. She didn’t deserve to face such an overwhelming problem all alone. But what could he do to help her? Stand by her as her friend? Give her money maybe, if she’d let him? There didn’t seem much he could do. And what if she moved away? What then? They would lose touch and he’d never see her again. Or her baby.
The possibility upset him. He almost had the urge to wake her and get her to talk some more about her plans. Instead he set the dish of eggs on the coffee table, then sat down to wait.
Maura’s eyes opened slowly. Doug’s face, very close to her own, filled her field of vision. His golden eyes glittered in the shadowy light, rugged features tempered by a slight smile. She stared up at him, studying the strong lines of his brow and chin, his amber eyes, square jaw and wide, soft mouth.
Then he lifted his hand and softly pushed a lock of her hair off her cheek…and she knew she wasn’t dreaming. This was real. Too real for her peace of mind.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep again,” she murmured.
“Better get used to it. Pregnant women fall asleep at the drop of a hat,” he reported with a slight smile. “Your scrambled eggs got cold. But you looked so peaceful, I didn’t have the heart to wake you.”
He was seated on the edge of the couch near her hip and leaning over her. His gaze met hers, and she couldn’t look away, feeling only vaguely aware of the movement of his hand, as it came to rest on the curve of her waist. Maura thought to sit up and move away, but she felt frozen in place. She felt as if everything was suddenly moving at a superslow pace. Even her words seemed delayed as she tried to speak.
“It must be late,” she said finally.
Doug made no move to check his watch, and she wondered if he had even heard her. His gaze moved slowly over her face, studying her, feature by feature, as if seeing her for the very first time.
“You probably ought to go,” she whispered.
“Probably,” he replied in a low, husky tone. His hand moved from her hair to cup her cheek, and before Maura could utter a single word, his mouth met hers in a deep, hungry kiss.
The touch of his lips to hers started out as a sensual savoring. Maura’s senses reeled with pleasure. All logical thought was totally short-circuited as Doug’s supple lips teased and tasted, coaxing her full response. Her hands automatically rose up to his strong shoulders, and the feel of his firm muscles and warm skin under fingertips instantly melted her last resistance.
She made a small moan in the back of her throat, a sound of half pleasure, half surrender.
She felt his response as his arms moved tightly around her, his kiss growing deeper. Their passion accelerated instantly, from zero to one hundred in a millisecond. It was as if a mysterious switch, hidden somewhere deep inside, had been flipped. Her mouth opened easily under his probing tongue, and her arms wound around his powerful shoulders. She felt him move next to her on the couch and she shifted over, so that he stretched out next to her, their legs and arms and tongues entwined.
The kiss that had begun so tenderly grew bolder. Hungry and intense. A knockout sensual punch that sent Maura’s senses spinning.
His embrace tightened as his tongue plunged into her mouth, sliding seductively against her own. His large, strong hands glided down her satin-covered back, sweeping over her waist and hips, then down to cup her bottom, pulling her close to his heat.
Then his warm lips left her mouth and wandered in a scintillating path down the column of her throat. His hand glided up over her soft curves and gently cupped her throbbing breast.
What was happening here? she wondered vaguely as she kissed him back. For all the months and all the intimacy she’d shared with Scott, he had never once kissed her like this.
No one had ever kissed her like this.
And never once had she felt this way in any man’s arms. So vibrantly alive, so sensual, so uninhibited.
Then suddenly, as if remembering himself, Doug lifted his head. “Maura…” he murmured in surprise. He dropped his head against her shoulder and took a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have done that,” he admitted in a harsh whisper.
Then, with some effort, he pulled away and pulled her robe up to cover her shoulders. “I came here to help you, not cause more problems.”
“I know that,” Maura said. She believed it, too.
Still, she felt shaken. Shaken to the core. His merest touch had sent her up in flames. She suddenly realized with a shock the strong attraction they shared. An attraction that she had so far been basically unaware of.
He sat up and took another long breath, then glanced at her with an awestruck expression. Then he got up and walked across the room as if he truly needed to put some space between them. He stood with his back to her, his hands on his hips.
Maura sat up, too, and fumbled with her robe. She wondered what he was thinking. Probably he was just plain confused. She felt confused, as well. One minute Doug was her pal, her surrogate big brother, and the next minute…
Well, to be perfectly honest, she always knew there was a spark on her side, but she’d been committed to Scott and never even dared explore those feelings. Besides, she only once had the slightest hint that Doug felt drawn to her that way. Did he have feelings for her that he’d never revealed because she was not free?
Then again, they had never been alone like this before, in such an intimate situation. An emotional tinderbox. That was it right there, she decided. Things like this can happen to people in a crisis. He’d just been swept away by the circumstances. He was feeling sorry for her, maybe even protective.
All these emotions had gotten confused in his mind. In her mind, too. It didn’t mean anything. She couldn’t allow herself to think that one kiss—one mind-blowing kiss, she had to admit—signaled something more.
Finally he turned to her, his handsome features calm and composed. She willed herself to act the same.
He looked about to speak, but she cut in before he could say a word. “That’s okay. Don’t even say it.”
His thick brows drew together in a frown. “How do you know what I was going to say?”
“I just know,” she replied. “You’re sorry you kissed me. You didn’t really mean it. These things happen. And you hope that it doesn’t change our friendship. Right?”
He stared at her with a narrowed gaze. “Wrong,” he said firmly. “I’m not the least bit sorry I kissed you. Surprised, maybe, and hoping you don’t think I was trying to take advantage of you. But definitely not sorry.”
“You’re not?”
“Heaven knows, I didn’t mean for it to happen like that, but it’s probably just as well. It makes the next thing I want to say easier.”
She was confused again. Had she missed something? “The next thing? Which is…?”
“Which is,” he said slowly, drawing the word out in his deep, low voice, “that I’ve figured out what you should do.”
He walked slowly toward her, and Maura felt her heartbeat quicken at the strange, unsettling light in his eye. Inner warning bells sounded. She couldn’t put her finger on it, but she felt something was about to happen to her.
Something momentous and totally unexpected.
He was standing right in front of her now, his muscular arms crossed over his broad chest. She had to tilt her head back to look up at him. Her mouth felt dry as she started to speak.
“And what do you think that is?” she asked in a halting tone.
“Simple.” His low, commanding tone gave her chills. “Marry me.”
“Marry you?” Maura wasn’t sure she’d heard him correctly. She couldn’t believe he was proposing to her.
“That’s what I said. I’m asking you to marry me,” he repeated patiently, holding her wide-eyed gaze.
“But how can I marry you?” She knew the question sounded silly as soon as she spoke the words, but she was too stunned to edit her reaction. “I mean, our relationship…we’re just friends. I can’t just marry you.”
She saw him blink, yet his expression showed no other reaction. She unconsciously bit her lip and looked away.
“A husband and wife should be friends,” he replied smoothly. “Don’t you think?”
“Of course I do. It’s just that there has to be something more to it.”
“Like love, you mean?” His deep voice held an uncharacteristically cynical note. “Let me tell you something, Maura. People get married every day thinking they’re totally, wildly, unbelievably in love. And more than half of them end up having rotten marriages.”
“Yes,” she said quietly. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’m sure that’s true.”
He was referring to his own failed marriage, no doubt, and she was curious to hear more. Yet she could tell it was still a painful topic and she didn’t think it was the time to ask him about it.
“I know you think this sounds crazy,” he continued. “I thought the same, too, when I first had the idea. But I’ve had some time to think it through while you were dozing,” he gently teased her. “I know this could work. I feel it in my gut. I respect you. I care for you. We share the same values and understand the demands of the kind of work we both do. We both love children. And you even laugh at my bad jokes,” he added with a smile.
“Only because I don’t want to hurt your feelings. I know how thin-skinned doctors can be,” she returned with a grin.
He laughed, and she met his warm gaze.
He really was so handsome. Even more so than usual right now, with that persuasive, hopeful expression on his face. And she knew that he was a decent man. Kind, even noble. Intelligent and successful, as well.
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Kate Little
Тип: электронная книга
Жанр: Современные любовные романы
Язык: на английском языке
Издательство: HarperCollins
Дата публикации: 16.04.2024
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О книге: Maura Chambers needed help with her unborn baby. Doug Connelly wanted to make up for a friend′s bad judgment. Not the best reasons for marriage, but enough to make Maura and Doug say «I do.»It was to be a marriage of convenience, to get Maura through a difficult time. But how, then, could she explain the hungry look in Doug′s amber eyes, the longing she felt during their nights together? The handsome doctor′s hands made her feel nothing like a plain Jane nurse but rather like a wanton, wanted woman. Everything was within reach–a husband, a family. Until she discovered Doug′s little secret…