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Cowgirl Makes Three / Her Secret Rival: Cowgirl Makes Three / Her Secret Rival
Abby Gaines

Myrna Mackenzie


Cowgirl Makes Three When ex-model Ivy Seacrest steps onto Noah Ballenger’s ranch he wonders why the prettiest woman he’s ever seen is working with cows, not on a catwalk! Can a doting daddy and his little girl mend Ivy’s broken heart…and make their little duet a trio?Her Secret RivalMegan Merritt deserves the top spot in the family law firm. Except gorgeous Travis Jamieson is also in the running for the job – and working on winning her heart, too… Megan doesn’t intend to lose either, but Travis is going to do everything he can to change her mind!










Cowgirl Makes Three


By




Myrna Mackenzie

Her Secret Rival


By




Abby Gaines











www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)





Cowgirl Makes Three


By



Myrna Mackenzie


MYRNA MACKENZIE grew up not having a clue what she wanted to be—she hadn’t been born a princess, the one job she thought she might like because of the steady flow of pretty dresses and crowns—but she knew that she loved stories and happy endings, so falling into life as a romance writer was pretty much inevitable. An award-winning author with over thirty-five novels written, Myrna was born in a small town in Dunklin County, Missouri, grew up just outside Chicago, and now divides her time between two lakes in Chicago and Wisconsin—both very different and both very beautiful. She adores the internet (which still seems magical after all these years), loves coffee, hiking, attempting gardening (without much success), cooking and knitting. Readers (and other potential gardeners, cooks, knitters, writers, etc.) can visit Myrna online at www.myrnamackenzie. com, or write to her at PO Box 225, La Grange, IL 60525, USA.


To the ladies of The Daisy Morris Nutrition and Activity Center in Campbell, Missouri, my home town.

This one’s for you!


Dear Reader,



A runway model and a cowboy? How is that going to work? I thought, when Ivy Seacrest and Noah Ballenger walked into my imagination.

Ivy:



Tall, thin and ethereal, almost fragile-looking. A strong Montana wind would surely blow her over.

Her face has launched a thousand products.

She knows about make-up and hair, and she likes cute little scarves and belts that don’t belong anywhere near a ranch.


Noah:



A man born to roam the land.

He’s big and rugged and not always careful about what he says.

He knows about horses and hay and how to rope a steer, and he doesn’t get into town too often…by choice.


These two are going to be trouble, I thought. How am I ever going to get them to hook up or even get along for more than five minutes?

Then things got worse. Ivy, I found out, couldn’t look at Noah’s child without having her heart rip in two. Noah couldn’t stand the fact that anyone would shy away from his baby. What was more, Ivy, it seemed, had a sassy mouth on her, and Noah wasn’t used to that! Really, these two gave me fits…right up until the day they stopped…and made my heart melt.



Welcome to the runway…and the ranch. It’s going to get warm in here—in the best way possible. I hope you enjoy the show.



Best wishes,



Myrna Mackenzie




PROLOGUE


IVY SEACREST STRUGGLED to keep her chin high and her backbone straight. She forced herself to stare directly at Melanie Pressman. “Are you sure you don’t have any openings at the diner? I’m not afraid of hard work.”

Melanie’s smile was small and condescending. “Afraid not. I’d like to do something for an old…friend, but I just don’t have a thing.”

Right. Ivy and Melanie had never been friends. They’d never been anything, even when Ivy had been living here in Tallula, Montana, ten years ago.

Given the situation, Ivy knew the smart thing to do was hold on to the few shreds of pride she still retained after these past few days of begging for a job and just walk away. Melanie wasn’t going to help her any more than anyone else had. But her situation was desperate enough that Ivy had to try one more time. Looking around to see what menial position she could volunteer for, she opened her mouth.

The bell over the door jingled as Melanie’s portly husband, Bob, entered the diner. He smiled. “Hey, Ivy. I heard you were back in town. You staying for a while?”

Ivy nodded even though she wasn’t planning on staying any longer than she had to. She turned back to face Melanie, but even the small smile was missing from the woman’s face now. Ivy could practically feel the cold blowing off the woman. It had been that way with almost every married woman in town. As if they thought she had come here expressly to lead their husbands down the path of sin.

“I could clean,” she told Melanie, knowing that even that was futile now. Melanie had the look of a woman out to protect her territory.

“I told you no,” Melanie said. “I don’t have any jobs open at all. Nobody here in town does.”

Which came as no surprise. This had been Ivy’s last chance, and she wouldn’t even have tried it, knowing how slim her odds were, if she hadn’t needed the money so badly.

She turned to leave.

“Nobody in town, I guess,” Bob said, “but I heard that Noah Ballenger was looking to hire a ranch hand.”

Even though Ivy’s back was turned, she heard Melanie’s hiss behind her. “Ivy’s a fashion model. Don’t you know that? She doesn’t hang out with ranchers and people like us anymore. She doesn’t do ranch chores. Things have changed.”

They certainly had, Ivy thought as she stalked toward the door. Her world had come tumbling down. She’d lost everything that mattered. The pain and the memories threatened to make her stumble, but somehow she stayed on her feet.

“I’ll try that. Thank you, Bob,” she managed to say.

“Stupid man. Noah’s not going to hire her, and he’s not going to thank you, Bob,” Melanie said as Ivy left the diner.

Ivy knew that both of those statements were probably true.

Too bad I can’t afford to care, she thought as she headed down the road that led to Noah Ballenger’s ranch.




Chapter One


NOAH BALLENGER SQUEEZED the telephone receiver so hard it felt as if it might break in his hand. “What do you mean Ivy Seacrest is on her way over here to apply for a job as a ranch hand? Because you told her I was hiring? Well…untell her. You should know that I can’t hire her. She doesn’t belong here, and I don’t have anything that a woman like her could actually do. I don’t care that she was raised in Tallula. She was a princess when she lived here and she’s been an international model for ten years. Whatever she wants, I don’t have it here and I never will.”

The answer came swiftly. It was too late to retract whatever had been said earlier. Ivy was already on her way, and no one in town knew how to reach her. Noah would have to be the bad guy and tell her no.

He frowned at the telephone and hung up. Ivy Seacrest? Not going to happen.

Noah had hardly known Ivy when she’d lived here. She’d been only eighteen when she’d left, four years younger than Noah. What little he did know from what he’d heard and the little he’d seen was that Ivy had possessed the type of rare beauty that had made people sit up and notice, and pretty much every man in town would have killed just to get her to smile at him. Noah had been the exception. He’d spent his younger years living, breathing and learning the ranch empire that had been in his family for generations and would one day be his, and when Ivy had been old enough for him to notice properly, he’d been away at college…falling in love with a woman who was totally wrong for a rancher. A woman who had nearly broken him in more ways than one. A woman not much different from Ivy.

Because of that experience, that woman, that completely misplaced and impossible obsession of his, other shaky dominoes had been put into play.

Old, nearly forgotten pain tinged with a sense of betrayal ricocheted through Noah, but he let it come. He needed to remember that because of his bad experience with Gillian, he had gone on to do things he regretted. Terribly. All because he was stupid enough to forget that Ballenger Ranch was his world, his destiny. It was his legacy to his baby daughter, and nothing and no one who didn’t fit with that image belonged here.

Ivy Seacrest was an exotic interloper from some other world. She didn’t belong in this town that had been built on cattle. He had no idea why she would even return to Tallula, since she hadn’t come back when her father had died a year ago. He sure as hell had no idea why she would try to hire on as a ranch hand. Maybe it was a publicity stunt. Something to do with her modeling career.

He didn’t know or care, but no way was he letting her on his ranch. He’d done his stint with beautiful, misplaced women. One of them had broken his heart. Another had betrayed him and his child, because she’d changed her mind about being a rancher’s wife after the deed was already done.

He was through with all that. No more women.

“Turn your pretty butt around, Ivy,” he muttered. “I don’t like to be the bearer of bad news.”

But he would do what he had to do. And what he had to do right now was send Ivy Seacrest packing.



Ivy stared at the long, low ranch house and nearly stumbled. She tried not to think about what she was about to do, what she had to do. Voluntarily spend time on a ranch, a world that she had sworn never to return to, a world filled with harsh and devastating memories. No choice. Absolutely no choice, she told herself. Just do it. Grit your teeth and do it.

Easy to say, but first she had to get Noah Ballenger to hire her, and she was pretty sure it wasn’t going to be easy. Heck, it might be impossible.

No, I won’t let it be impossible. I’m not letting him stop me, just because he doesn’t like me.

She wasn’t just kidding herself about Noah not liking her, either. When she had lived here ten years ago, Noah had been the only man who hadn’t liked her. Or who hadn’t appeared to notice her…which, back then, was pretty much the same thing.

Lots of girls had disliked her. That much was evident by how many times in the past few days she’d been turned down for jobs by those girls turned women.

But she had to have work, and ranching, much as she loathed it, even though it brought back awful, tragic memories, was the one thing other than modeling that she knew how to do. With modeling no longer an option, it was the only thing she knew how to do.

A wave of panic hit her, thinking about being back on a ranch. Living the life that had trapped her and obsessed her father so much that nothing else had ever mattered…including the health of his wife and the well-being of his child.

Barraged by bad memories, Ivy still kept walking. Sometimes you had to go through fire to break free, and this job on this ranch was her ticket out of this town that had killed her mother and had nearly killed her own spirit. Noah Ballenger was her only hope.

Ivy started walking faster. Get this over with. Get it done. Keep working until you’ve got enough money and then run away again as quickly as you can.

She nearly sprinted to the door. There she took long, deep breaths. As ticked off as Melanie had been, she had probably called Noah to warn him that Ivy was headed his way, so with a little luck Noah would be at the house.

Still, Ivy hesitated. After hurrying to the door, she was suddenly hit with a wave of pure fear. Growing up on her father’s ranch, she’d felt trapped, beaten down, with her whole identity ripped away from her. Now she was volunteering to step back into that kind of life. Was she insane?

No, I’m desperate. Just knock on the door, say whatever you have to say to get a job. This is only temporary. It won’t be like the last time.

She was on the verge of almost being prepared mentally when the door swung open wide, and the entrance was blocked by a large, broad-shouldered man. Ivy surprised herself by having to look up. A tall woman, she was used to being at eye level with most men. Noah Ballenger was obviously taller than most men.

He was, she noted, like a wall. Big, imposing, dark haired and, from the forbidding look in his amber eyes, not happy to see her.

She wanted to close her eyes and run back to New York. Instead, she forced herself to stay rooted to the spot. She swallowed and tried to control her racing heartbeat and her breathing. “Hello,” she managed to say, holding out her hand. “You probably don’t remember me, Mr. Ballenger. My name’s Ivy Seacrest. I used to live on the Seacrest Shores Ranch. I understand that you’re hiring a ranch hand, and I’m here to apply for the job.”

Ivy tried a professional-looking smile. It should have been easy. Her smile had once been her fortune. She’d been able to turn it on and off at will. But Noah was looking at her as if she was something…unpleasant. She just couldn’t manage to make that smile work.

“I remember your family. I know who you are,” he said without a trace of warmth in his voice.

She wondered what he remembered. There was plenty to remember, most of it bad.

“Bob Pressman told me that you were looking for a hired hand. I’d like to apply.”

He gazed down at her with eyes that had been known to cause women in the town to melt. Ivy had heard the stories, heard the audible sighs, but right now she didn’t have the luxury of melting, even though she felt trapped and overwhelmed by his gaze, her heart thundering. What she had was the distinct feeling that Noah was going to try to brush her off quickly.

“Maybe we could discuss this in your office,” she suggested, holding out her hand and taking a small step forward in the hope that he would simply step aside and let her cross the threshold.

Bad idea. He moved, but forward, blocking her and bringing her outstretched fingertips into contact with his chest.

He looked down at her hand, not budging. She could feel the warmth of his skin seeping through the white cotton of his shirt, and her breathing kicked up a notch. There was something very virile about this man, something a bit wild lurking beneath the surface.

Noah Ballenger would be a hard man to handle. That was bad. Ivy was used to handling most men, and the ones she hadn’t been able to had almost destroyed her.

She jerked her hand away. “Excuse me. I’m sorry. I—”

“Why?” he asked. “Why would you even want a job here? The word is that you hated ranching. You took off as soon as your looks won you a modeling contract. Don’t try to tell me that you’ve rediscovered a love of the land.”

Ivy looked way up into those amber eyes again, trying not to wince at Noah’s reference to her looks. Her appearance had been the one thing she’d been able to count on, but the scars she bore now were a painful and constant reminder of the day everything she valued had been torn from her.

To her surprise, Noah was no longer frowning. His expression suggested a genuine need to know why she was here. But he still hadn’t budged or suggested that he might grant her an interview.

She didn’t want to have to explain herself.

But it didn’t look as if she had a choice.

“Modeling isn’t an option anymore.” She had grown used to saying the words, so she could do it now without a trace of emotion in her voice, even though the frantic fear at having no way to make a living lurked right beneath the surface, threatening her composure.

He stared at her for a few seconds, the intensity of his expression making her feel naked, nervous. She had a terrible need to duck her head, look down, hide what he was seeing. Even worse, his scrutiny of her damaged face was threatening her composure. She had an awful inclination to go back, relive those devastating moments two years ago. Don’t, don’t think about that day, please don’t. The words spilled out into her consciousness, saving her, and somehow she managed to keep staring directly at him. She forced herself not to remember the terrible, heartrending things that had brought her here to his door.

His nod was almost as brusque as hers had been. “If you say it’s not an option, that’s your choice, but that still doesn’t explain your sudden interest in ranching when you hated it before.”

Panic began to swirl within her. She didn’t want to talk about her motives. “Does it matter? As long as I can do the job?”

“It depends,” he said. “If I wasn’t sure a man could do the job he claimed he could do, if his motives were suspect or if I would have to start the hiring process over in a few days because he decided that he’d changed his mind about working here, I’d ask a lot of questions.”

She stood there, staring into those eyes. He didn’t back down. Finally she looked away.

“Fair enough,” she said. “I’m here because the taxes are due on my parents’…that is, on my ranch and I don’t have the money.”

“And you want to keep the property.”

She shook her head. Hard. No, she hated that ranch. Just being there these past few days had brought back bitter memories. “I want to sell the ranch, but I have to pay the taxes before I can do that.” Did the desperation show in her voice? Did she have any pride left at all?

Not much. She’d lost her pride along with her son, her husband and her career in a car crash two years ago, but she wasn’t sharing any of that with this man.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t want to talk about this. You have the right to ask me why I want the job. The answer is the same one many other people would give. I need work. I know ranching.”

“You hate it. That fact still stands.”

She wouldn’t deny it. Ranching had ruled her father’s world. It hadn’t been good to her.

“I know how to do the work.”

He looked doubtful. He looked as if she could tell him that she’d won the Ranch Hand of the Year award and it wouldn’t have made a bit of difference to him.

“Why not take a job in town?”

Ivy took a deep breath. Should she tell him that she’d been turned away without an interview for every job the town had to offer? That snide smiles had accompanied the “Sorry, but no” responses she’d received?

No. Those were Noah’s neighbors and friends.

“That’s not an option, either,” she said. And, in truth, those had been jobs that were outside her skill set anyway. This one wasn’t.

He was slowly shaking his head. “You seem to have ruled out a lot of options, lady. But working here…it’s just not possible.”

“I’ll work hard,” she promised.

“I never said you wouldn’t.”

“So hire me. I heard that you needed someone.”

“I need a big someone.”

“I’m big.”

For a minute she almost thought he was going to smile. He rubbed one hand over his jaw as if to hide his amusement. “You’re tall. I need someone beefy.”

“I’ll eat more.”

Now he did smile. Just a little. “Ivy…”

“I can do this, Noah.”

He shook his head again. “I’m sorry, Ivy, but you’ll find something else. Something will open up in town. I need a man.”

Now she visibly bristled. “That’s discrimination. It’s illegal.”

“So sue me.”

As if he knew that she wouldn’t. She couldn’t. There just wasn’t time, even if she had the money for a lawyer. And if she had money, she would have already paid the taxes and left town.

“Aren’t you even going to invite me in? Can’t we talk about this? You could give me…I know…you could give me a test. Let me do some chores just to show you—”

“No,” he said stopping her. “I’m sorry, Ivy. It’s not happening. Goodbye.”

With that, he stepped back and shut the door right in her face.

Ivy stood there for a few minutes. Anger, red and hot and simmering, bubbled inside her. Then she turned and walked away. And kept walking until she was out of sight of the house.

Forget it. It’s over, she thought. What was she going to do?

She stopped and looked out over the land, at the barns and outbuildings, the machinery and fences. She could almost hear her father saying, “The land will never let you down.” Maybe not, but it had stolen her life. His obsession with ranching had cost her a childhood, a father and her mother’s life.

Still, standing there gazing at Noah’s ranch, one much larger and more successful than her city-bred father’s had been, she remembered helping pull a calf, feeding cattle in winter. She still knew how to do these things. And doing them would pay her way out of Tallula again. If she could just make it happen.

Turning toward the house again, she remembered Noah’s last words. It’s not happening.

“Maybe not, Noah,” she whispered. “But it won’t be for lack of trying. You haven’t seen the last of me.”



Noah stared out the window, watching Ivy’s retreating back and feeling like the biggest jerk on earth. She walked away tall and proud, but he’d seen the stark disappointment in her eyes before she’d gone.

Not that that changed anything. He’d lived on this ranch all his life. It had been his since his father’s death five years ago, and he had hired and fired a number of people during that time. Ballenger Ranch was what he would leave to his little girl when he was gone, and two-and-a-half-year-old Lily was the most important part of his world. He couldn’t gamble with the ranch. He needed good, solid people working here.

Not someone who would hate the lifestyle and fly away at a moment’s notice, leaving him in the lurch. He needed someone committed to ranching, and he knew all too well about people who weren’t cut out for this life. He had a child with an absentee mother who was living proof of that.

It was his duty to protect his child from more cut-and-run people. So, much as he felt bad for Ivy’s financial difficulties, much as he admired her for having the guts to ask him for this job again once he’d turned her down, he still couldn’t deny that she didn’t belong here.

While they’d been talking, he had been assessing. She was thin, almost fragile looking. Whether it was because of years of enforced model thinness or something else, he didn’t know.

What he knew was that fragile didn’t play well on a ranch.

“You could give me a test,” she’d said, with those big blue-violet eyes practically snapping. Modeling wasn’t an option anymore, she’d said. She’d reached up as if to touch her face, and he’d seen that her small nose bore a crease; her lips looked as if a part of them had been erased at one edge. He didn’t know where she’d gotten those scars, but the scars didn’t seem to matter to his body. Everything male in him had made him want to look closer.

And that, above all, let him know that she didn’t belong here. She wasn’t built for this life, and he couldn’t survive mucking things up with a woman again. His soul just couldn’t handle that kind of damage anymore. But more important than that, there was Lily to consider.

His daughter and the ranch were his world now. Forever. Both of them came before any needs or desires of his. Anyone who came here had to pass his Lily test. They couldn’t negatively impact his world. So no, he couldn’t allow himself to be swayed by a pair of pretty, blue-violet eyes or long legs or sun-kissed blond hair.

But he hoped that Ivy found some sort of work soon. He hoped she made enough money quickly. Then she’d be gone, and that would be a good thing, because he didn’t trust himself to run into her in town and not appear interested.

That night after dinner he took Lily from Marta, his housekeeper babysitter, and went onto the porch to watch the sun going down. Brody, his foreman, was walking toward the house.

“I just got back from an errand in town. Word on the street is that Ivy Seacrest applied here today as a ranch hand,” Brody said. The man’s interest looked to be more than casual, and Noah remembered that Brody and Ivy were somewhere near the same age.

“Forget it, Brody. I’m not hiring Ivy so that you’ll have something prettier to look at than cows or the other hands. She’s not coming back.”

And Noah continued to think that right up until the moment he walked into his barn the next morning and found Ivy pitching hay into one of the horse stalls.

“Good morning, Noah,” she said.

Ivy’s hair was a color that defied description. Strands of honey were mixed with palest tan and pure blond, making a man want to look closer and let the strands slip between his fingertips. Her eyes were eager, her smile bright. Noah felt as if he’d been punched in the chest, so aware of the woman was he. He wasn’t even going to allow himself to let his gaze drop to the way her pale blue shirt and denim jeans fit her curves. The fact that he was noticing any of this at all was bad news.

“Good morning, Ivy,” he said. “Now, if I could just have my pitchfork back, I’ll point you toward the door. I meant what I said yesterday.”

Her smile froze. Her shoulders slumped just a trace before she caught herself.

“It was worth a try,” she said. “I won’t bother you anymore.”

Too late, he thought. She was already bothering him. He was already thinking about her and worrying about her. It was a sickness, this fear that he would make another misstep with a woman.

Which didn’t change a darned thing. “Not a problem,” he said. “I admire your tenacity. I wish you luck.”

She handed him the pitchfork, and even through the rough gloves she wore he was aware of her slender hands, those long fingers.

“You could have let her try,” Brody said, coming up behind him once Ivy had gone.

With a swift turn of his body, Noah faced Brody. “I did that once. I let Pamala try to play at being a rancher’s wife. And where is she now? She’s in California, playing at her new role of wannabe actress. She didn’t even care enough about Lily to say goodbye. What am I going to tell my child when she wants to know why her mother never comes to see her? You think I want to expose her to more of that when Ivy is cut from the same cloth as Pamala was?”

Brody’s face paled, but he didn’t drop his gaze.

“You can’t live your life letting your mistake with Pamala color everything you do.”

Of course, Pamala had not been his first or only mistake with a woman, but that was none of Brody’s business.

“Watch me,” Noah said. “Ivy’s not working here. I’ll get the women in town to put some basic supplies together so that she’s fed and clothed. But I am not giving her a job. And that’s final.”

No matter what she did or said, she was never going to be a part of Ballenger Ranch.




Chapter Two


SHE HAD TOLD NOAH that she wouldn’t bother him anymore, so why was she out here repairing a section of fence?

Ivy wrestled with her conscience. She acknowledged that simply trying to stay out of the man’s way while still attempting to impress him with her ability to do the job was pushing the limits. But what could she do? She needed money to survive. If she could earn enough money to pay the taxes, she could sell the ranch. Then she could hide for a long time. No facing reporters wanting to ask her how losing Bo and Alden and her famous face had changed her life. It had been two years, but just as soon as she thought everyone had forgotten about her, some new model would shoot to the forefront and the reporters would seek her out again for a “whatever happened to” segment, and she just couldn’t do that.

She’d enjoyed modeling and her looks had brought her honest work, but how she felt about the loss of those looks was…complicated. Her scars were a reminder of a life she had loved and lost, but even more than that, they were a reminder of her failure to save her baby, and she never hid them with makeup. She had lived while Bo died. She couldn’t forgive herself for that, but she wouldn’t discuss it, either. No. She needed anonymity and enough money to allow her to disappear.

So, yes, she felt guilty about her impulsive comment to Noah, but she couldn’t give up. Taking her pliers in her gloved hand, she snipped the wire and pounded the staple home, snugging up the wire.

“Nice job, but it won’t work, Ivy. Most of my fences are in good repair.”

She whirled, and there he was. “How did you sneak up on me like that?”

“Applesauce knows how to be quiet.” He patted the big black gelding.

“Applesauce? He looks more like a Thunder or Killer.”

Noah almost smiled. “My daughter named him.”

Daughter. Child. He had one. Hers was gone. The familiar arrow of pain bit deep, but she was ready. She’d heard that he had a child, so she was able to keep from crumbling. This time.

“She’s a little young to be naming horses, isn’t she?”

“Lily’s almost three, but she loves horses and she also loves—”

“Applesauce,” they said at the same time.

Ivy let that sink in. A man who would risk being ribbed by other men for riding a horse with a silly name in order to make a child happy seemed more human than she wanted to acknowledge.

“The horse is irrelevant, though,” he said. “I’m not hiring you, Ivy. You’re wasting your time and mine.”

Okay, no matter that she was touched by his regard for his daughter, Noah was never going to be on her list of favorite men. If she had such a list, that is.

“You haven’t even given me a chance.”

“I don’t have to. I own the ranch and I call the shots.”

Desperation began to crawl through her bloodstream as she felt her last chance slipping away. “So you’ll hire a man with inferior skills just so you won’t have to hire a woman.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“The fact that you won’t even test my skills implies as much.”

“Maybe I just don’t want to hire an insubordinate employee.”

“I wouldn’t be insubordinate.”

He chuckled. “Ivy, you’re arguing with me. Isn’t that the definition of being insubordinate?”

She frowned. “I know how to follow directions and be submissive.” Unfortunately she knew that all too well. And the word submissive…maybe that hadn’t been the best choice. He was looking at her as if she’d said something sexual. Then he swore.

“I’m sorry. You obviously have your reasons for pursuing this, but I have my reasons for saying no. It’s not happening, Ivy.”

She opened her mouth.

He groaned. “Give up, Ivy.”

Something inside her cried out at the injustice, but she knew when she was beaten. She’d traveled this “no way to win” path before. In this very town. On the ranch she’d grown up on.

Pocketing her pliers, she turned to walk away.

“You don’t have to walk. I’ll arrange for you to ride.”

She stopped, tipped her head back as she pivoted and stared up at him. “No. You have only one thing I want and that’s all I’ll accept from you.” A ride was a pity gesture. She had what it took to do this job, even if Noah couldn’t see it. Walking home was nothing. Deciding where she went with her life from here? That was the difficult part.

Still, she wouldn’t let him see her fear. A frightened woman wouldn’t change his mind. Ivy squared her shoulders and marched away. She and Noah were done, unless…

Stop it, she told herself. There won’t be any unless. He’s made that clear.

But then, she’d always had a stubborn, rebellious streak. Sometimes a good dose of stubborn was all a person had to see them through the day.



“What’s that you’re eating, pumpkin?” Noah asked his daughter.

Lily held out one chubby little hand, in which she clutched a mangled piece of toast with jam. She looked up at him with her huge blue eyes and smiled. “Cook-ie,” she said with a little laugh.

Noah wiggled his eyebrows. “That looks like toast to me.”

Lily giggled. “Cook-ie,” she insisted.

“Marta, are you giving our girl cookies for breakfast?” he asked incredulously.

Marta gave a dramatic sigh. “She insisted.”

Noah shook his head. He pointed to the toast. “No cookies for breakfast, Lily.”

“Cookie,” she said with another laugh, her blond curls swaying as her little body rocked with delight at this strange little routine she and her daddy had somehow fallen into.

Noah did his best to look stern. “Okay, hand over the cookie, Lilykins.”

And here came the good part, the part she loved. “No. Toast,” she said with great relish and popped a piece into her mouth.

“Ah, you are a clever one, sweetheart,” he told her. “And a stubborn one. You know how to get your way when you want to.”

He was still thinking about that when he wandered outside to work. In her own way, Ivy reminded him of Lily. Stubborn and determined and proud and hard to resist.

Noah stopped in his tracks. That was a road he didn’t want to travel. Ivy had no business invading his thoughts. That was how all bad things with women started—when you let ones you had nothing in common with start creeping into your thoughts uninvited. Next thing you knew you were in high water, unable to get back to shore or swim against the strength of the current, and they were leaving you. Or even worse, they were leaving Lily. Hurting her. Without so much as a drop of remorse.

Noah growled.

“Bad night?” Brody asked, coming up beside him in the barn.

“You sound hopeful.”

Brody laughed. “Not at all, but if you did have a bad night, your day isn’t going to be any better. Ed broke his leg last night and he’s out of commission. Now we’re down two hands instead of just one.”

Noah’s growl turned into a blue streak of cussing.

“Is that any way for a daddy to talk?”

“No, but Lily’s inside, and I have good reason to swear. I recognize that look in your eyes.”

“What look is that?”

“It’s the ‘I’m holding a good hand’ look. You’ve wiped the floor with me at poker that way before, so let’s not play games. Say what you’ve got to say.”

“Okay, I will. The thing is…Ivy isn’t just nice to look at. She’s a determined worker. I saw her wade in and rescue a calf yesterday that had gotten caught in some muck.”

“She did what? And you didn’t tell me?”

“No point in telling you when you weren’t listening.”

“She was going. She wasn’t coming back.” But in Noah’s mind he heard Lily holding a piece of toast and telling him that it was a cookie while she laughed at her own joke. Ivy might have left and intimated that she wasn’t coming back, but she obviously had a stubborn streak as wide as his daughter’s.

Now Brody was shaking his head. “She sure did a number on you, didn’t she?”

Noah didn’t ask who. Brody didn’t know the half of what his wife had done or about the woman preceding her. And Noah had had enough. Without saying another word, he turned toward his car.

“If you’re looking for Ivy, she’s out at the corral getting acquainted with Bruiser.”

Noah’s heart lurched. “And you let her? I should have got rid of that horse long ago. I’ve been meaning to. Have to before Lily starts roaming around outside.”

“I get the feeling Ivy isn’t the kind of woman a man lets do anything. She has a mind of her own.”

But Noah was through listening. Brody was clearly besotted and worthless where Ivy was concerned. Instead Noah made a beeline for the corral where Bruiser was penned alone. He had bought the horse one insane day a year ago when he’d finally realized that Pamala was never going to even make an attempt to be a mother. He’d been counting on the hope that once Lily got past the tiny baby stage and turned cute as all get-out, Pamala might at least try to show up and be a mother occasionally. But he’d thought wrong. He’d raged against Pamala’s coldhearted betrayal of her own child, but there had been nothing he could do.

He’d been in the mood to go up against someone his own size, and Bruiser had seemed like a creature who was more than willing to meet the challenge. He and the horse had ridden the hills, fighting each other, each one half-crazy and wild. Although there was evidence that the big horse had been abused at one time—there were scars on his back and flanks—he and Noah were a match. They had ended that long ride with an understanding, a wary respect for each other, but Bruiser didn’t tolerate anyone else. As big as he was and with that surely volatile history, he was too dangerous to keep on a ranch with a young child who promised to grow up unpredictable.

Noah already had misgivings about his abilities as a parent. He’d made mistakes, he’d failed Lily on many occasions and in many ways, and worst of all, he hadn’t been able to stop Pamala from leaving his little girl. But he meant to do better, to be as good a father as he could, so selling Bruiser should have been an easy call. He didn’t know why he hadn’t done it already, but now he was going to have to. Apparently Ivy Seacrest was going to force his hand.

Again. Noah frowned. He rounded the barn…and came upon Ivy in the corral brushing Bruiser’s coat. The huge black creature looked more than a little nervous.

“Ivy,” Noah said softly.

She raised her head, looking almost as wary as Bruiser. Like some wild creature who had been abused and expected to be abused again.

“Shh,” she said, and she soothed her hand over the big horse’s side.

Bruiser shivered, and Noah’s breath nearly stopped. “For God’s sake, Ivy, step away from the horse. Slowly. Quietly.”

“He’s not going to hurt me.” She leaned closer to the horse.

“He’s not a lamb, Ivy. He’s big and muscular and easy to anger and—”

He stopped midthought when she smiled. The maddening woman was wedged up against the massive bulk of a nervous horse—and she was smiling. “What on earth are you smiling about?”

“Big, muscular, easy to anger,” she said. “Sounds like you.”

Suddenly he wanted to smile, too, and he would have if he hadn’t still been worried about her safety.

“I mean it, Ivy. Bruiser isn’t just any horse.”

“I know,” she said sadly, tracing a scar that ran down Bruiser’s back. “He’s been hurt.” Her voice nearly broke, but as she ran her hand over the animal, Bruiser whickered softly. He turned his head toward her and nudged her shoulder. Gently. He shivered again, and now Noah could see that Bruiser’s expression was anything but angry. That shiver hadn’t been nerves. He liked having Ivy pet him.

“You sly devil,” Noah said to the animal. “What do you know about that? It seems that my unpredictable, angry horse likes you, Ivy.” He’s got something in common with Brody, Noah thought.

“He just likes someone who understands and trusts him.” She stared at him with those big, innocent-looking blue eyes that weren’t innocent at all. She was trying to school him, and her point was clear.

Now Noah couldn’t keep from smiling. “I don’t distrust you.” It was more like himself he didn’t trust. Around her. She was far too attractive, and he was not a man who could afford to be attracted indiscriminately anymore. Still, he couldn’t stop smiling at her attitude.

“You don’t distrust me, but you’re not hiring me,” she pointed out.

“Yes, I am.”

“You are?” Her voice was so hopeful and—She obviously pushed hard against Bruiser, who whickered and sidestepped.

“Dammit, Ivy, get out of there.”

“I told you…he won’t—”

“I know what you told me, but I want you out of there.”

She raised her chin. Tall as she was, Bruiser dwarfed her height. Noah almost said “Please.” That wouldn’t be smart under the circumstances. A boss didn’t plead with his employees.

“Are you working for me or not?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Yes.” And giving Bruiser a hug—a hug, for heaven’s sake!—she climbed over the fence and dropped lightly to the ground beside Noah. “I’m working for you. What do you want me to do first?”

Her vault over the fence had left her standing mere inches from him, so close that if he leaned forward he could place his lips against her forehead, tangle himself in that tawny hair.

What do I want you to do? Let me touch you or…no…I want you to step away, dammit! he thought. He almost stepped back himself, fearful that he might put thoughts to deeds and actually touch her. Instead, he cleared his throat. “Tomorrow will be soon enough to start work. For now I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

“I’ve met Brody.” Oh, yeah, he definitely knew that. Brody was going to be laughing…when he wasn’t drooling. Noah was going to have to make some rules about how Ivy was to be treated. By all of them.

He introduced her to Darrell.

“Delighted, Ivy,” Darrell said with a smile that Noah thought was much too wide.

“Come on,” Noah said, barely giving Ivy time to answer. “Let’s go to the house.”

Ivy stopped in her tracks. “Oh. No.”

Did she think…surely she didn’t think…“We won’t be alone,” he explained.

She blinked and tilted her head back to look into his eyes. “I didn’t think that. I just…your family will be there.”

“There’s just me and my daughter, Lily, and my housekeeper and babysitter, Marta. You’ll be in contact with them if you’re working here.”

She blanched. “I…my father never had any workers. I hadn’t thought…I thought I would just work outside with the men. I don’t need to meet your daughter.”

Something hard and flinty took shape within Noah. Pamala had not wanted children. She’d hated everything associated with her pregnancy and she’d barely looked at Lily after she’d been born. Within days, Pamala had gone. Off to California looking for something better. For the limelight. Away from her baby.

“You don’t like children.” He couldn’t keep the edge from his voice.

But when she looked up this time, her eyes were so…anguished was the first word that came to mind.

“I don’t dislike children,” she whispered. “I need to go home now. I’ll be back bright and early tomorrow. To work. Outside.”

Then she fled.

Noah stood there wondering what he had done, what he had gotten all of them into. For sure it wasn’t anything good.

In the middle of the night he woke from a dream. He’d been plunging his fingers into Ivy’s hair, framing her face with his hands, kissing her and staring into those blue eyes.

This time they hadn’t been anguished. They’d been filled with passion.

But none of that was real. The reality was that Ivy Seacrest didn’t want to be near his Lily.

Finding out why would involve getting to know Ivy better, and he didn’t intend to do that. Just as soon as Ed was able to get around without crutches, he’d pay her off handsomely and send her on her way.

No more night dreams of her. He hoped.




Chapter Three


IVY IMMERSED HERSELF IN ranch work as if she really enjoyed it. She drove herself relentlessly. By the end of the first morning the pretty, crisp scarf she’d been unable to resist fastening at her neck was wilted. She was muddy and worn and she had a long scratch on her hand, the result of catching her glove on barbed wire, which tore it off and bit into her skin. Still, there was a sense that she was accomplishing something, closer to her goal of paying her debts, leaving her past and Tallula behind and getting on with her life.

That was a good thing. Of course, she knew darn well that good things didn’t last forever, and sure enough, right when she had just got knocked on her butt by a cow and had landed in a pile of muck, she looked up to find herself staring into Noah’s amber eyes.

“Need a hand?” he asked, reaching out.

She stared at his big, manly hand and knew that touching him would be a mistake. She’d already realized that he was just too potent for her. But she was his employee. He was just offering what he would offer to Brody or Darrell if either of them had landed on their backsides. Saying no to a gesture of goodwill would make something more of this than the situation merited.

She reached out, felt his hand close around hers, big and strong. She felt the kick of awareness, the heat that pooled in her body.

“Thank you,” she somehow managed to say once she was on her feet and, once again, standing much too close to the man. What was wrong with her lately, anyway? It must just be the effect of being back in a place she’d thought she had left behind long ago. She was ten years older, but nothing had changed.

Except Noah is much more potent than I remember. Ivy wanted to scream at the thought. Instead, she backed off a step and put her shaking hands behind her back.

“You okay?” he asked. “I didn’t think she nudged you that hard, but you’re pretty slight. Easily hurt.”

Ivy chuckled. “Still trying to talk me out of working for you? Too late. You’ve given me a job, and I’m not going to lose it.”

“I saw what you were doing, trying to convince that stubborn cow to accept her calf. She’s not too thrilled that you’re trying to turn her into a mama.”

“Poor little thing. Every time he gets close, she kicks out at him. He’s almost too scared to try anymore. But I’m not giving up. This is going to be a love relationship before I’m through.”

He shook his head, muttering something about “love relationship” and “city-girl nonsense.” He turned to walk away, then swung back.

“Go up to the house and tell Marta you need a change of clothes. There are some things…my wife didn’t take everything when she left. I’m sure there are some jeans you can fit into.”

Ivy could see that he didn’t like talking about his ex-wife. Well, who could blame him? She didn’t know anything about Noah’s situation, but the words when she left were pretty telling. As for his suggestion that she go up to the house? Panic began to beat within her chest.

“I’m fine,” she said.

“Ivy,” he drawled.

“Noah,” she drawled right back.

“I expect my employees to be sensible. You’re not acting sensible. Brody and Darrell live on the ranch, and all their things are here, so there’s no problem if they need to clean up. You’ve got nothing here.”

Which said a whole lot about her situation in Tallula. She was an outsider, and she did have nothing here. Not just on this ranch, but in this whole region. But Noah had given her a job. He was trying to be nice. And she was a mess, with a half day of chores still to go. All she had to do was go to the house, quickly change and get back to work. The little girl might not even be around.

“Thank you for offering,” she said. “I should remember to leave some clothes here in future.” And with great determination, ignoring the tortured pounding of her heart, she started toward the house.

Noah’s hand on her arm stopped her. The man must walk like a cougar. She hadn’t even heard him coming. She looked up into his eyes.

“What exactly is it about my daughter that bothers you so much?”

They stood there, connected, their eyes locked for several seconds. Then Ivy blinked.

“How much time do you spend on this ranch, Noah?”

He raised one dark eyebrow. “Most of it. Why?”

“I see. Well, that explains things.”

He looked perplexed. “Maybe you should explain to me.”

She took a deep breath. “You know that I became a model after I left here?”

“Of course. Everybody knows that.”

“But you don’t know anything about me beyond that.”

“I’ve been a bit busy. I must have let my copy of Elle expire.”

“Oh, that was wicked, Noah.”

“I try.”

Ivy almost smiled, except…now came the tough part. She hesitated, then opened her mouth to speak.

He shook his head. “I don’t know anything, Ivy, because I don’t tune in to gossip. Plus…I really had no right to ask that question. You’re here to work, and your skills and dependability are all that matter. I shouldn’t have gone all Papa Bear on you and asked. I retract my question.”

Somehow that made it easier. “No, I want to explain. I don’t want you to think that I dislike her. It’s just—when I told you that modeling wasn’t an option anymore…I was in a car accident a couple of years ago. That’s where I got these scars.” She touched her face. Some days she missed the profession she’d loved, but there were things so much more important than being pretty. She would lose more, give more, if only…

“My husband was killed,” she rushed on, “and…and my little boy was…he was, too. So please don’t think I have anything against your Lily, Noah. It’s not that at all. I just…” She bit down to keep her lips from trembling.

“Ivy, I’m—damn, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry.” He slid his hand up her arm and across her cheek. He cupped her jaw in his palm. “I’m so sorry. Next time you just tell me to shut up.”

Ivy felt as if her body was being taken to another plane. She was aware of every inch of her skin Noah touched. And his concern—that rough quality in his voice—made her want to lean close, touch him, too. She hadn’t had anyone other than doctors touch her in two years.

That thought stopped everything. If she reacted to the sensation of Noah’s skin against her own, it was just because this was the first time. She struggled for something smart-mouthed to say, anything to distract her attention from the physical contact between them. What had he said to her?

She found a tiny half smile somewhere. “I’ve never had a boss tell me that I should tell him to shut up.”

“You’ve probably never had a boss who made such a boneheaded misstep.”

Finally she found her footing and gave him a real, whole smile. “You’ve clearly never been a model if you think that.”

The laugh that emanated from his body traveled through his skin, the vibration pulsing in his fingers that were still touching her face. As if he realized what he was doing to her, he lowered his arm. “Yeah, no modeling for a rough guy like me.”

Although, in her mind, he could name his price if he went into modeling. Women would empty their piggy banks just to get him to take his shirt off.

“I’ll just go to the house and get something for you,” he said. “There’s an empty crew house over the rise. It’s not much, but you can use it while you’re here.”

“I don’t like acting weak,” she confessed.

“Lady, you hugged Bruiser. You took a shove from a cow that weighs ten times what you do. Weak is not a word I’d use with you.”

“What words would you use with me?” Where had that come from? “That came out wrong. Let’s just not go there,” she corrected.

“Too late,” he said with a wink. “I have three words to describe you right now. Stubborn, sassy and…in need of clean jeans.”

“That’s more than three words.”

He chuckled. “Roll with it. Ranching demands flexibility.”

Noah turned to leave. Then he quickly turned back. “You’re bound to run across her now and then while you’re here. Can you handle it?”

Ivy nodded tightly. “I’m so sorry about this, Noah. I’m sure your child is sweet, and I would never want to do anything that would hurt her. I just…I’m still working things through, and right now…”

He held up a hand. “You don’t have to explain. If anything happened to Lily, I’d be insane. Everything I do, say or am right now and for the next twenty years or so revolves around her. Every decision I make deals with her. I never forget that, so while I can’t possibly put myself in your shoes, I can understand why being around her is a problem for you. I—you know how temporary this job is, don’t you?”

“Yes. I don’t need it to be anything else. I’m not staying.”

“Good. I can’t and won’t hide my child away, but since you won’t be here long, we can make concessions that wouldn’t work out if you were long-term. What I’m saying is that I’ll do my best to make any contact between you as brief as possible. Will that work for you?”

“Yes.”

She would make it work. Somehow she would manage to make all of this work.

And she would not think of Noah as anything other than her boss. She definitely wouldn’t allow herself to remember how much she had liked having his fingers against her skin.

“Yeah, I’ll get right to not remembering that,” she muttered to herself as he strode toward the house and she tried not noticing how long and strong his legs were.

Why had she ever imagined that working for Noah would be smart?



Noah carried the jeans out to Ivy. Just pretend you don’t even know that in a few minutes she’s going to slip out of her clothes and pour her long, slender body into these, Ballenger, he told himself, struggling to do just that.

“They might be a bit short,” he told her, his fingertips brushing hers as he handed them over. A zing of male awareness ricocheted through his body at the touch. Ignore that, he ordered himself.

“I’m sure they’ll be fine. Thank you,” she said softly.

“Here, I’ll show you the cottage. It’s been empty for a while, so I’m not too sure how things look inside.”

They looked pretty bad. When he opened the door and saw the layer of dust and the sad and shabby furnishings, the first thought he had was that she had been a model. This would look like a hovel to her.

“It needs work,” he said, stating the obvious.

“I like work.”

“Well, then, you’re going to love this place.” He stepped past her to pull open a shade, and as he did, his body brushed hers. Was that hiss of awareness coming from him or from her?

Noah looked into her eyes. He couldn’t tell what she was thinking, but he could tell that she wasn’t unaffected by him.

Too bad. The lady’s off-limits. “I’ll just let you get to…”

Undressing.

“Business,” he said, hoping that his voice didn’t sound hoarse. “And I’ll get back to mine.”

Probably best to leave Ivy to Brody’s care, he thought, heading back to the house. But something stubborn and strong inside him didn’t like that idea.

So deal with it. He’d obviously been on the ranch too long; his reaction to her was beyond hot. But there was nothing he could do about that. He and Ivy had a deal. He would keep Lily away from her, and Ivy would leave as soon as this job ran out.

That thought strengthened him. He’d been an idiot before, but all of that was pre-Lily. There were serious, long-term consequences to his actions now. He couldn’t afford to do anything stupid.

Ivy Seacrest would be just another hand to him from now on. The fact that she made him break out in a cold sweat couldn’t matter.



Three days passed, and Ivy tried to work and not pay attention to anything else going on around the ranch. She tried not to notice her aching muscles or the fact that her ranching skills were rusty. She especially tried not to remember how she had reacted to Noah in that split-second brush of his body against hers when he had moved to open the shades.

“Damn, damn, damn,” she muttered beneath her breath. For two long years she had not had one whit of an interest in men. Life had jerked her around too much and all the bad times had boiled down to her dealings with men who had ruined her life—her father who had destroyed her mother with his blind, obsessive devotion to his ranch, and her husband, Alden, whose obsessions that blinded him to others’ feelings had destroyed everything else that had mattered to her. She would never get involved with another man who wore blinders, and it was clear that Noah did.

That comment about Elle magazine had been funny, but it had obviously also been true. Despite his comment about gossip, he had to have been out roaming the range not to have known anything about her past, given the way the paparazzi had covered her accident.

Or maybe he’d been mourning the loss of his wife, she thought. But even that was evidence of how much he cared about this ranch. She’d heard that his ex-wife had left because she hated the ranch. Yet Noah had stayed. He’d let her go.

That was none of her business, but it was just impossible to dodge. The other day when she’d shown up wearing the too-short jeans, Darrell’s eyebrows had risen.

“Noah let you wear Pamala’s pants?”

The pants were a bit loose around the waist, but Ivy had suddenly felt as if they were too tight. She’d wondered if Noah would look at her and think of his Pamala.

Brody had let out a low whistle. “They look way better on you, Ivy, even though they’re a bit high on your boots. But—damn!—I’m surprised those are even still around. I would have thought Noah would have burned those things. She sure burned him. She hated Ballenger Ranch like fire hates water.”

Ever since then, Ivy had tried not to wonder about the man who’d let his wife walk while he stayed at the ranch. It wasn’t any of her business, but she was still glad she knew. It would make it easier to think of Noah not as a man but as a man she couldn’t want. Actually, it would be best not to think of him at all, but that was impossible—a truth that was driven home when she found out that the following morning she would need to ride out on a search for lost cattle. Roping would be involved. Noah would be there.

Her courage nearly failed her. She’d never been good with a rope and hadn’t had much experience with one. Her less than stellar performance might convince Noah that he’d made a mistake hiring her. So at the end of the day she took a rope and, moving as far away from the house as she could, she practiced, using a bale of hay with a stick jammed into it. Time and again, Ivy swung the rope, but without much success. Anxiety made her clumsy. She had told Noah she would be a good hand. What would he say when she couldn’t even hit her targets?

Biting her lip, she turned and stared off into the distance, hands on her hips. Frustration nearly paralyzed her, but standing there worrying wasn’t helping. “Stop being such a coward, Seacrest,” she muttered to herself. “Just keep trying.” She turned back to her task.

“You’re swinging too high to the right, and the loop you’re using is too big for you.”

Finishing her turn in a rush, Ivy stared at Noah, who was standing less than twenty feet away and moving closer.

“How—how long have you been watching me?”

“Long enough to see the problem.”

To see that she couldn’t even hit an immobile stick, much less a moving animal. “I’ll practice. I’ll be better by morning.”

He gave her a long, assessing stare and shook his head. “I’ve got a dummy steer that will work better than that stick. I’ll show you how to use it another day. Tomorrow we’ll do the run without you.”

No, no, no, ran through her mind. He would lose respect for her. So would Brody and Darrell. A hand who couldn’t carry her weight was a liability, not a help. “I’ll make the adjustments you suggested. Noah, I know this isn’t my call, but…I want to be there tomorrow. I’ll learn. I won’t be deadweight.” She had very little left in the world. She couldn’t afford to lose this job…or her pride.

But she could see that he didn’t believe her. And why should he? If he’d seen her repeatedly miss the target, he had to be thinking she’d be more of a hindrance than a help.

“I’ll keep practicing tonight until I have it,” she said. And when he didn’t answer her right away…“Please,” she managed to whisper as heat flooded her face.

Noah swore. “Why didn’t your father teach you to rope?”

“I guess…he wasn’t very good at it himself.”

Noah gave a terse nod. He turned and started walking.

“Noah?”

“Don’t move. I’ll be back,” he said.

A few minutes later he returned with a contraption that looked like a plastic steer’s head on a metal body. “All right. Let’s do it,” he said.

Something like relief and gratitude mixed with fear swooshed through Ivy. She concentrated hard as she twirled the rope, knowing her loop was too wobbly and uncertain.

Noah stepped to her side. “Like this,” he said, gently grasping her hand and guiding her arm. “Keep the loop of the rope open and bring it across your body this way as you twirl it. Nice, easy motions. Steady.” But she didn’t feel at all steady. Noah was trying to help her, but the closeness of his big hard body, the warmth of his touch as his arm came around her and crossed her body, brushing against her, made it difficult to breathe or think. She looked up at him over her shoulder and for a moment the rope stopped moving as he stared back at her, their hands joined.

“That’s the basic movement,” he said, letting her go and stepping away. “Now you try on your own.”

She twirled the rope, awkwardly at first.

“The back of your hand will almost touch your mouth as it comes around,” he said, demonstrating with his own rope. “When you release the rope here,” he said, showing her, “the momentum of your arm finishing the turn and your hand pointing this way will send the rope right over the steer’s horns.” Breaking the instructions down into simple steps, Noah finally made it make sense for Ivy as she watched him rope the dummy steer.

“Are you ready to try again?” he asked.

Ivy nodded, more determined than ever. For the first time she felt hopeful that she could master this skill. She might be awkward, but with Noah’s help, she understood the mechanics of the process. Twirling her loop, keeping it open, she paid attention to her hand and to the loop as she released it. It fell short, and she was disappointed, but it was close. Her earlier attempts hadn’t been. She sucked in her lip, her brow furrowing.

“Again,” he said.

Ivy twirled the rope again. Miss. Throw. Miss. Throw. This time it landed neatly over the horns.

“Yes!” she said, grinning at Noah. “That’s one. It was a good one, too, wasn’t it?”

He laughed. “It was a sweet little toss. A winner.”

But one toss standing on the ground wouldn’t be good enough for tomorrow’s task. “Thank you,” Ivy said. “I—you can go now. I’m just going to keep practicing until I’m consistent.”

He raised a brow. “It’s been a long day, and tomorrow will come early. You should rest. You know, there are plenty of cowboys who aren’t especially good ropers.”

And those cowboys sometimes got passed over for better ones. “I’m not going to be that kind,” Ivy said. She tossed the rope again. And again. Over and over, , until she could land it most of the time. By now Noah was leaning against the fence and watching her with a lazy-cat smile on his face.

“What?” she asked.

“Don’t your batteries ever run down?”

“Not when I need to get something done.”

“Well, you’re done now. Your arm’s going to be sore.”

“But tomorrow I’ll be on a horse. I need to try it on a horse.”

“Ivy…”

“Noah…just a few times, so that I won’t be nervous tomorrow?”

“One or both of us will fall off the horse asleep tomorrow if we don’t finish up here soon,” he muttered, but he led her to Binny, a sweet little palomino. “She’s gentle and patient.”

Which was a good thing. Roping from horseback was more complicated than being on foot. Ivy didn’t really reach proficiency, but she was beginning to be afraid that Noah was right. They both had to work tomorrow, and…he had a child waiting. The thought made Ivy feel guilty. She sighed, turning in the saddle to apologize to Noah for keeping him out so late.

“You are tired,” he said, misinterpreting her sigh. “That’s enough, Ivy.” With that, he reached up and plucked her from Binny’s back, sliding her to the ground. “Bed,” he said.

She blinked. His hands were still around her waist. He was so close. She was still tingling from the contact, and the word bed hung between them.

Noah swore, and not beneath his breath this time. He let her go. “Don’t argue with me anymore today, Ivy. Just go.” He was obviously not any happier than she was at the arc of electricity that had passed between them.

Ivy’s breathing was still erratic. “Okay,” she said in a rush. “I’m done. Don’t worry.”

But she worried for a long time before she fell asleep. If she were smart, she’d give Noah a wide berth from now on…even if she couldn’t stop thinking about how his hands had felt on her.



Apparently Noah had been thinking the same thing, because the next day he worked mostly with Darrell and assigned her to Brody. The day passed and the one after that. She and Noah spoke very little other than basic greetings. Most of her orders came through Brody.

Still, whenever she saw Noah in the distance—working, riding, lifting his daughter onto his shoulders—something about him made her stop and look.

On the third day Ivy was gathering equipment to go help Darrell repair a windmill when she saw Noah heading toward the house. The door flew open, and Lily came tumbling out, running in that frantic, wobbly way that two-year-olds run.

“Da!” she squealed, raising her arms, confident that her daddy would pick her up.

“Hey, pumpkin, how’s my girl? Did you get away from Marta?” Noah scooped up the tiny child and swung her into his arms right against his chest.

Ivy couldn’t turn away. She couldn’t move. She couldn’t stop thinking about Bo’s toddler laughter that she had never heard. And yet that wasn’t this child’s or this man’s fault.

She stared, even though the pain cut right through her, razor sharp, leaving a trail of desolation she couldn’t control. It came upon her suddenly, tracking her down, forcing her to remember that she would never, ever get to hear Bo laugh. Never.

Tears slipped down her cheeks, and she swiped them away. She fought the keening wail that threatened to escape her. Then Noah began to turn.

Ivy ran. She stumbled into the toolshed, scrubbed her face with her hands and began rummaging through the tools, blindly looking for…something. She didn’t even know what she was looking for.

The shadow that fell over her told her that he was standing in the doorway. “Be right there,” she said, hoping that her voice didn’t sound too thick.

“Ivy.” He knew. He’d seen.

“I just have to get a few tools. Darrell and I are going to fix the windmill out on Jessup Flats. Darrell’s waiting.”

“Ivy, I’m sorry.”

She turned, pushing her chin high. “Don’t be. She’s a sweet little girl. She’s yours. The fact that I lost my son—that doesn’t mean you should apologize for having a daughter.”

“I’m not.” He came into the room.

No. Don’t, she thought. I’m not strong right now. I need to get my feisty back on so no one can see the cracks. Hiding the cracks was all that had gotten her through most of her life.

“Then there’s nothing to apologize for,” she said. “Don’t be silly.”

“I’m never silly.” He said the word as if he didn’t know the meaning. She had to admit that she had desperately pulled that one out of a hat, trying to change the tone in a wild stab at regaining her composure and her cool. Models didn’t show emotion unless directed to.

But I’m not a model anymore.

Maybe not, but she still lived by those rules. “It’s been a long time since I helped fix a windmill. Has the technology changed?” she asked, peering into the tool bin.

“Not around here.” He reached past her, scooped up a pipe wrench and handed it to her. When both their hands were on the tool, he didn’t let go. “I thought you were away from the house, with Brody. I’m sorry for your loss, Ivy.”

Okay, he was going to insist on being nice, on doing the polite thing. Maybe that would make it easier. All she had to do was be polite right back and he would go. She wouldn’t have to keep wishing that he would touch her. Noah—with his child when she could not be around children and with his ranch when she could not live on a ranch—was the worst man on earth for her. But…she knew how to politely talk her way out of a situation, didn’t she?

“Thank you. I appreciate that,” she said. “It helps.”

He uttered a curse word that she was pretty darn sure he never used around Lily. “It doesn’t help. Even a brute like me knows that, Ivy. So…has anything helped?”

Ah, there was her out. “Work. Work helps.”

“Then I guess I’d better let you go.” But he didn’t let go of the wrench.

“Noah?”

“What?”

Her mind was a jumble. He was so close. She was so…darn, he was so close. She glanced down at their fingers, only inches away from each other. His gaze followed hers. “I don’t like this…this physical stuff messing with my job,” she said, tugging on the wrench. “So why don’t you just kiss me so we can get it over with?”

Ivy’s suggestion shocked even her. Well, she wasn’t exactly thinking straight right now. And why not kiss the man? Everyone in town seemed to think she had come to Tallula on a mission to collect men anyway. Why not live up to their expectations, spit in their eyes the way she always had? Her city-bred parents had been snooty to the people of Tallula, and Ivy had always been an outsider, long before she’d left and become an actual outsider. She’d learned to tough it out, act the part. Slipping back into that persona would probably be easy enough.

“Or better yet, I’ll kiss you,” she said. She rose on her toes, grasped Noah’s shirt and planted one quick kiss on his lips.

Simple. Easy. No. Not either of those. At all. Noah’s lips were warm; his masculine scent surrounded her; his big body made her want to curl closer.

Panic ensued, and Ivy rushed toward the door before she could do something stupid…like let Noah see how that kiss had affected her. “Now,” she said as nonchalantly as she could, “we’ve got that behind us, so we can totally forget this ever happened and get on with our lives. And don’t ever apologize to me again for loving your daughter.”

She fled, her lips burning, her cheeks on fire. And, she soon realized, she had left without a single tool. What on earth would she tell Darrell?

She didn’t know…or care. She had kissed Noah Ballenger. Was she totally insane?

“Yes,” she whispered. “But at least he isn’t pitying me right now.”

He was probably getting ready to fire her butt.




Chapter Four


NOAH FELT LIKE a restless lion who’d been prowling solo for months and had just realized that there was a female in the vicinity.

Ivy would probably hate that comparison. That rigid backbone, determined chin and all that sass were hard evidence that she had a boatload of pride. And she was doing her damnedest to hang on to it. She liked to play tough, to keep people off guard so that they couldn’t see the pain she was carrying. Even someone like him who was a heck of a lot better with horses than with women could see that. That was why she’d kissed him, wasn’t it? To distract him from feeling sorry for her.

Well, it had certainly worked. For a few minutes his entire body had flamed. His brain cells had fried. Every nerve ending on his body had reacted. That mouth, that silky, soft mouth that tasted of peppermint and some indefinable sweetness that was hers alone had left him wanting to chase her down, pull her against his body and plunder that mouth again.

That would have been incredibly dumb. She had been right. The sparks had been flying between them from the first, but they needed to get that out of the way, because there could be nothing between them.

She couldn’t even look at Lily. And he would never allow Lily to be hurt again. He would never get tangled up with anyone who would desert his child.

Ivy and her luscious lips were off-limits. And he would just have to suck it up and take it. And consider himself lucky that he had gotten one taste.

“I saw you kiss Ivy.” Brody’s voice came from behind him.

Oh, hell, Noah thought. He couldn’t even defend himself. He didn’t want Brody to know that it was Ivy who had done the kissing, especially since she’d kissed him only to get rid of him. Hadn’t the woman been hurt enough?

“You didn’t see anything,” Noah said. “It was nothing.”

“Nothing sure looked hot.”

“Nothing is ever going to happen again,” Noah reiterated. But he wondered if he was trying to convince Brody or himself.



Well, she had certainly done it, Ivy thought. Kissing Noah had seemed like a good idea at the time. She’d been sizzling every time he got near and she had thought that kissing him would kill two birds with one stone. It would get him to stop pitying her for losing her child while he still had his, and it would release the physical tension that had been building between them.

“Wrong on at least one count,” she whispered. Now that she’d felt Noah’s mouth beneath hers, she wanted to kiss him again. She wanted him to kiss her, and she wanted…she looked down at her hands. She wanted to touch him.

“Argh!” she said, rubbing a cloth over the kitchen counter of the crew house. She had moved out of her old home that was filled with ghosts and bad memories. The spartan little cottage suited her. There were no memories here. Under other circumstances and on any other day, it would have been perfect.

Today this house and the ranch simply reminded her of Noah, the last person she needed to be thinking about. He couldn’t be in her plans; she couldn’t be in his.

She needed to get away, and her parents’ house wasn’t a good choice. Where could she go?

Well, she did need to pick up a few things, and playing “bad Ivy” with the townspeople would at least take her mind off Noah. There would be tension, but the tension in Tallula would be the kind she could handle.

Borrowing the old ranch pickup that Brody had told her she could use, she headed for Tallula, parked and walked into a small department store. As she entered, several people turned toward her.

Immediately a salesclerk rushed up. “Ms. Seacrest, may I help you? That is…we don’t carry too many fancy things…”

“Nothing a model would wear,” another woman said, her tone judgmental. Ivy recognized the woman. She’d been a pretty girl, but the boy she’d liked had been fixated on Ivy. Now, remembering the ache she felt every time she witnessed the closeness between Noah and his daughter, closeness that had been torn away from her, Ivy felt a twinge of responsibility toward the woman and dismissed her snooty remarks. Maybe she was married and the marriage wasn’t going well. Maybe she and her husband had fought this morning. Maybe she was worried that Ivy would overshadow her again and steal her happiness.

So even though her first reaction as a teenager would have been to put up her chin and say something smart, or to act cool and unmoved, Ivy decided to take a different tack, to try to be nice in the face of nastiness.

“It’s okay. I’m sure you have exactly what I need,” she said. “I’ll look around until I find what I want.”

Silence settled in. Ivy’s heart thudded. She reminded herself that she had always been an outsider here and always would be. And why should she care, when she wasn’t staying?

She drifted over to a rack of cotton work shirts, then found some inexpensive but pretty scarves, looking up to see the belligerent woman still staring at her. What had the woman’s name been? Oh, yes, Sandra. The other women had nodded curtly at Ivy’s speech, and one or two had even smiled a little, but not this one. Clearly, Ivy’s speech hadn’t mollified Sandra.

Ivy soon found out why. There was a small coffee shop in the store, and a few of the women wandered over there. Whispering ensued. A few looks were cast Ivy’s way.

Finally one woman separated from the rest and approached Ivy. “I know we haven’t met. I didn’t live here back when you did. I married into Tallula,” the woman said. “I’m Alicia Kendall.” She held out her hand.

Ivy blinked and shook her hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Alicia.”

“Ask her about Noah,” a woman called.

Ivy’s heart started thudding. The women of the town had decided that she was here to mine men. Did they think she was trying to seduce Noah?

“What do you want to know?” she asked, raising her chin defensively and looking directly at the woman who had asked the question.

For half a second the woman looked embarrassed, but then she shrugged. “What’s he up to? He almost never comes to town. You can’t blame a single woman for being interested in what a good-looking single man is doing. I mean…can you? Don’t you think he’s handsome?”

Ivy hesitated. “Is this a test?” she finally asked.

The woman blinked, and Ivy gave her a slow smile. “Sorry. Bad habit,” Ivy said. “I guess I was a bit of a smart mouth when I lived here, wasn’t I?”

“More standoffish, I’d say,” another woman said, looking down her nose a bit. “Since you asked.”

Was this the strangest conversation? Ivy wondered. She’d been here for several days before being hired, and no one had wanted anything to do with her. She had wanted nothing to do with them. There was friction in the air. So…why was she half enjoying this exchange?

But she knew. When she’d lived here, she’d always felt trapped, a fish out of water…or maybe a fish frantically swimming in circles in a teacup. Then, when she returned and had been trying to find work, she’d been scared. But now that Noah had hired her…well, she knew she wasn’t staying. She had a job; she wasn’t trapped. She could relax a bit, she decided. Interact.

“Fair enough,” she agreed. “I was standoffish.” She’d never been good at the up-close-and-personal stuff, because her home hadn’t been that way. “But I’m afraid I can’t tell you much about Noah. I just work for him. I hang with the hands.”

That seemed to satisfy most of the women. But they didn’t drop the topic of Noah. “It’s a shame he never brings Lily to town,” one woman said.

“A child should have contact with other children.”

“A man shouldn’t be alone,” Sandra said. “Noah deserves a good woman, his own kind.” She looked at Ivy, and Ivy was tempted to hold up her hands as if to say This has nothing to do with me. But she remembered that kiss. She just couldn’t forget that kiss.

Another woman laughed. “As if he couldn’t have one if he wanted. Give it up, Sandra. He’ll marry when he wants to. Lily, now, she’s another story. She’s growing up alone on a ranch with no other kid contact. That’s wrong.”

“Are you going to tell Noah that?” Alicia asked.

“Tell Noah how to raise his daughter? I’d sooner tell the devil that he should have air-conditioning in hell. Some things you just don’t do if you don’t want to have your head bitten off.”

“I think he should bring her to town,” Sandra suddenly said.

“You just want Noah here so you can slobber over him.”

Someone else laughed. “It would be nice to have the chance to gaze on Noah now and then. Someday he might get over Pamala, but if he doesn’t come to town, he won’t even think about one of us. And we can’t just make up some excuse to go see him, either. He’d see right through that.”

There was a sudden silence, and Ivy looked up to see several speculative glances on her. What was that about? Were they looking at her scars? Had they finally noticed the obvious?

Ivy didn’t know, but she once again felt like an outsider. I don’t care. It doesn’t matter, she reminded herself. She’d be gone soon enough.

For now, she just wanted to escape. She quickly paid for her things and headed for the door.

“Goodbye, Ivy,” someone called out, to her surprise.

Ivy turned and saw Alicia’s encouraging smile. Several more women called goodbye, albeit with less enthusiasm.

“Goodbye,” Ivy said quietly. “I—I guess I’ll be seeing you.”

“Oh, you will,” Sandra said, without smiling. “Tell Noah that Sandra says hello.”

Ivy managed to get out the door, but for some reason she didn’t want to understand, she didn’t tell Sandra that she would tell Noah anything.

Because I’m staying away from him as much as I can, she told herself. But she knew that that wasn’t the reason. Sandra wanted to be the next Mrs. Ballenger, and while Ivy knew that she and Noah were all wrong for each other, she didn’t think Sandra was right for him, either.

Or maybe she just didn’t want to think about Noah’s lips pressed against Sandra’s.

“And maybe you just better forget that kiss,” she muttered to herself. But she knew that she wouldn’t.



It had been two days since Ivy had gone into town. Noah hadn’t fired her for being insubordinate or for kissing the boss, but he had kept his distance. That didn’t mean she wasn’t totally aware of his whereabouts every minute. At times she even thought she felt his amber gaze on her, but when she turned around, he was always involved in some chore.

Still, every time, her heart started to thud…too hard.

She didn’t miss what was going on with Noah and his daughter, either. Despite her efforts to ignore Lily, the little girl’s laugh carried, her soft lisping voice touched a chord in Ivy’s heart and…well, it was wrong to keep a child cooped up, so she did her best to remain at a distance so that Lily could run and play freely and Noah wouldn’t feel guilty.

But the women’s words about Noah and Lily kept running through her head, and not just the stuff about how incredibly hot Noah was, but the fact that he stayed on the ranch and never took Lily to town to play with other children.

She’s only two, Ivy thought. And what do you know about parenting?

“It’s none of your business,” she muttered.

“Are you talking to me?”

Ivy looked up and saw Noah standing in front of her. She had been looking down at the ground as she walked, lost in her thoughts, but here he was, shirt off, a grease smear on his shoulder and a spark-plug wrench in his hand. He was standing next to the old truck she drove. The hood was open.

“Did I break it?” she asked.

He laughed, and deep dimples appeared in his cheeks. His dark hair had fallen over his forehead. He was a mess, and she had never seen anything she wanted her hands on so much in her entire life. “It breaks all by itself. Regularly. Make sure you carry a phone when you’re driving.”

“I know a few things about cars,” she said. “May I help?” Why on earth had she offered?

But she knew. She knew. She wanted to be close to that beautiful muscular body. She wanted to be there in case he laughed again. She wasn’t any better than Sandra.

Except I don’t want to marry him, she thought. I just want to touch him, maybe look at him a little.

She was totally pathetic.

“You’ll get grease on you,” he warned.

“Grease won’t kill a person.”

“Not the trendiest look for models, though.”

“I told you, I don’t model anymore.” It was getting easier to say those words, even though she sometimes missed the profession where she had fit and felt comfortable. With Noah, she felt…too aware of her body. And his body.

He nodded. “I heard you the first time you told me.” But he looked her over carefully, as if examining her for flaws from head to toe. Ivy squirmed. She fought to hold her head high, so that her scars were visible.

“Not buying it,” he said. “You carry your head higher than most women do. I’ve noticed those pretty little scarves you wear, the ones you know darn well will never make it through the day, but you wear them anyway. You’ll always be Ivy Seacrest, international model.”

He was so wrong. The scars had ruled that out, but she didn’t argue. Pointing out her scars only sounded as if she were asking for pity, and pity wasn’t what she wanted from Noah. No, she wanted…

A job. Just a job, she told herself. “Just the spark plugs or a full tune-up?” she asked.

“Full. I’m mostly done. Just have to change the oil.”

She nodded, grabbed the oil wrench and pan and slid beneath the truck.

“You’re pretty handy,” Noah conceded.

She chuckled as she drained the oil into the pan. “I told you, I had to learn all this when I was growing up.”

“So ranch chores, repairing cars…what else?”

“The usual. Cooking, cleaning, general household maintenance, painting.” She left out the bit about nursing an injured mother because her father wouldn’t pay for a doctor. That wasn’t for sharing.

“All that and you went to school, too.”

“They don’t call us supermodels for nothing,” she said, trying to tease because she was afraid that he was feeling sorry for her.

“No arguments here. I’m just not sure I want to go that route with—well, I admire your skills, but your days must have been long.”

He’d been thinking about what his plans were for Lily, hadn’t he? Ivy remembered what the women in town had said.

None of your business. Keep out, she thought. And yet…she slid from beneath the truck, wiping the oil off her hands with a rag. “When I was in town, there were some ladies talking about you.”

He raised one dark brow. One dark sexy brow. Uh-oh. “What were they saying?”

“You mean, besides the fact that they all want to run naked before you and have your babies?”

“Interesting conversation.”

“Just saying that they seemed disappointed that I couldn’t give them any hot news about you.”

“So you and the ladies in town are tight, eh?”

“Like this,” she said, twisting her fingers around each other. “Actually, we’re not so tight. I barely know them. At least one of them hates me. None of the others want to be my shopping buddy. Not their fault. I didn’t spend a lot of time socializing when I was growing up.”

“Understandable. You were fixing cars and herding cattle and painting houses.”

“Right.” Because he was partially right. Even if she had “fit” with the girls in town, she wouldn’t have had time to play. Which brought her back to the topic at hand. The one she wasn’t going to go near.

“But I could tell this much from their conversation. They think you’re keeping Lily from meeting other kids. They think it’s bad for her.”

Oh, brother, just shut up, Seacrest.

“I see.”

“No, you don’t. You think I’m being nosy and—okay, I am being nosy. Lily is…”

“Off-limits.”

“Yes.”

“And you never wanted to talk about her before.”

She still didn’t. It hurt too much.

“I know, but—”

“But nothing. No one tells me how to raise my kid.”

“I’m not doing that.”

“Sounds a lot like that’s where you’re headed, Ivy.”

“Okay, you’re right, but…”

“I’ll take her around to meet other kids when it’s time, but I want her to be grounded here first.”

“You’re afraid she’ll like town better.” Like his wife.

A mask came down over his eyes. The discussion was closed. She didn’t blame him. She had crossed a line. If Bo were still alive and some…stranger with no experience tried to tell her how to raise him, she’d feel the same way Noah did. Ivy cursed herself for doing something as stupid as trying to advise a real father on how to parent. She felt awkward, embarrassed and angry with herself, so she knelt to return to her task.

“Do you think you know so much more than I do?” Noah asked suddenly.

“No!” The word came out on a harsh whisper. “I know nothing. Almost nothing. I know…this one thing. I lived this one thing. If you keep her here, she’ll eventually feel trapped and grow to hate it. But you’re right. It’s your call. She is only two. There’s still time. I think.”

Noah swore beneath his breath. “Is that what happened to you? Your daddy trapped you on that ranch of his? I used to hear things, but—” he held out his hands “—I never knew much about the man.”

Ivy looked up into his eyes. “The ranch was all he thought about. It was his life, so he made it my life. He didn’t like the town or the people, just the ranch. We weren’t good neighbors and I felt awkward in school. I felt as if people knew I was a prisoner in my home. I didn’t know how to talk to people. I never learned. But you won’t do that to Lily. You love her.”

“I do. She’s everything. And I won’t hurt her. I promise. I won’t trap her.”

His words were soft and solemn. They made her ache, because they felt like…like an apology to her. She nodded and ducked her head. She needed to get back to work, to remember that he was her boss, and only her temporary boss at that.

But before she could slide back under the truck, he knelt beside her. “I’m sorry for what happened to you back then.”

Oh, no. Pity again. “Don’t be. It made me strong.”

“All right. Then I’m glad that you got to escape and had the chance to see the world.”

“And I apologize for interfering.”

“You were concerned about Lily.”

She shrugged. She didn’t want to be concerned about Lily. She absolutely could not open that door. The risk of being destroyed was too great.

“Ivy?”

“What?”

“Look at me.”

She didn’t want to, but if she didn’t, he would think she was weak.

“Some of those women have been giving you the cold shoulder, haven’t they?”

“They have their reasons.”

“I can’t think of a single good one. I’ll talk to them.”

Reaching out, she curved her palm around his bare biceps, clamping down, trying not to notice the sensation of her skin against his. “No.”

“It’s not right.”

“It is what it is. I’ll handle things.”

“You’re my employee. I can’t have people mistreating you.”

“If you think that you chastising them for not liking me will change their minds, you’re totally clueless. Some of them are half in love with you.”

He frowned. “Ivy…”

“Noah…please don’t. It won’t help, and it doesn’t matter anyway. I won’t be here long enough for it to matter.” It was a warning to herself. She didn’t want to become one of those women. She didn’t want any man having power over her again.

He blew out an exasperated breath. “Only half in love?” he suddenly said.

“What?”

He gave her a slow grin. “The women. Only half in love with me?”

“You’re good. Maybe that’s why you’re the boss.”

“Good at what?”

“At turning a topic around. At dispelling tension.”

“Maybe. Maybe not.” He looked into her eyes, and she saw the fire burning there. Oh, yeah, he was right. There was plenty of tension here.

“I have to be smart,” he said. “And not follow my instincts. You understand what I mean?”

How could she not when he glanced down to where her fingers were still curled around his arm? The very sight made her long to slide her hand higher, up his arm, down his chest. Instantly she let go of him.

“People can get hurt,” he said. He meant her. Somehow she knew he meant her.

“I won’t.”

“Because you’re strong?”

No. She wasn’t that strong. “Because I know what happens when a woman lets a man have power over her. I’ve done it before. My father. My husband. The results were disastrous, so I’m pretty much done with men.”

“Pretty much?”

She frowned. “I’m getting there. I want to be completely done, but I’m only human. I still feel desire.”

Noah groaned. “I really wish you hadn’t said that.”

“Why?”

His answer was to swoop in and kiss her. Just once…and once was not enough. Not nearly. Her lips stung, burned, ached. She barely resisted the urge to press against him and return the kiss. In fact, she was leaning into him when she caught herself. And saved herself by quickly picking up her oil wrench and slipping beneath the car.

Fiddling with the car, she fought to calm herself. “Now I’m done,” she said.

“With the oil change?”

“With men.”

“Good. I’m holding you to your word. I don’t trust myself not to touch you again, so I’m just going to have to trust you.”

Don’t trust me, Ivy thought. But hadn’t she just told him that she was strong?

Be strong. Be smart, she thought as she yanked on the wrench and removed the filter. I will, she promised. Because if she just stayed away from Noah, banked her paychecks and let the hourglass run out, nothing could happen. Right?




Chapter Five


NOAH WAS IN THE KITCHEN finishing breakfast with Lily when a car pulled up in front of the house. Mary Sue Morris, who ran the flower shop in town, emerged, wearing a slinky dress that this ranch had never seen the likes of before. Half a minute later she knocked on the door. Had she been one of the women who had criticized his parenting skills?

Marta opened it just as Noah moved away from the window and into the living room. “Mary Sue,” he said with a frown. “Problem?”

Her cheeks turned bright pink. “Oh. No. I’m just—I’m looking for Ivy. She was in town the other day, and…well, I need to get to know her better. Is she around?”

Yes. He’d seen her come out of her house a few minutes ago wearing those jeans that fit her long legs and curves perfectly, a white shirt, and a pale blue scarf at her throat that made him want to untie it with his teeth and kiss the tender skin that lay beneath. Darn it, he could not be this way about a woman who would leave, a woman who hated ranching and a woman who was afraid of his child. And yet he was aware of her. Constantly. The sensation of her in his arms, his lips on hers drove him crazy. Constantly.

He glared. Mary Sue smiled at him brightly. What in hell was that about?

“Ivy’s working.” His voice was gruff.

The woman shrugged. “That’s perfectly okay, Noah. It’s been so long since you and I talked, anyway.”

They had never really talked. And he certainly didn’t want to talk now, especially if she was going to bring the conversation around to Lily and his deficiencies as a father.

“It’s probably time for Ivy’s break,” he grumbled. “I’ll find her.”

“Oh…okay. I’ll walk with you.”

His frown didn’t seem to dissuade her, and as she ran to keep up with him, the darn woman kept talking about how much she’d always wanted to live on a ranch. She kept giggling, which made Noah walk faster.

Still, when he found Ivy cleaning out the horses’ stalls, the whole ordeal of listening to Mary Sue giggle was totally worth it. Ivy looked at her dirty clothes and at Mary Sue’s slinky dress. Her perfect model’s blue-violet eyes widened. Clearly she hadn’t been expecting this.

Noah performed the introductions—Ivy didn’t seem to have a clue who Mary Sue was—and then he leaned against a nearby railing to see what happened next. He remembered what Ivy had said about the women of the town not liking her, and despite her protestations that he shouldn’t interfere, he wasn’t leaving until he was sure that Mary Sue would behave herself.

“Well…here you are,” Mary Sue said.

“Here I am,” Ivy agreed, her brow furrowed in concentration. “Can I help you?” she asked the woman.

For a second Mary Sue looked flustered. “You’ve been away awhile. I thought we might get reacquainted.”

By rights Noah should be upset that Mary Sue was interrupting the work day, but his curiosity about why the woman was here when Ivy had intimated that no one liked her trumped his irritation.

“It’s break time. Go. Talk,” Noah said, even though work time hadn’t started that long ago.

His comment sent Ivy’s eyebrows arching, but it brought a look of relief to Mary Sue’s face. “Maybe we could talk at the house. It’s such a nice house,” she said, looking at Noah.

He glowered.

“No,” Ivy said quickly. “I don’t live there.”

Noah knew that Ivy’s objection had as much to do with Lily as it did with her status and the fact that she had never been inside the house. He also knew that Lily and Marta were playing behind the house.

“It’s okay, Ivy,” he said, and she got his meaning right away. She still didn’t look comfortable, but she went.

That was that, except…for the next few days women kept showing up at odd times. Noah considered barring them from the ranch during work hours, but something stopped him. In his mind, he saw Ivy prepared to stand outside until dawn throwing a rope so that she wouldn’t be a burden on the roundup. He remembered that her father had tied her to the ranch and…she had lost her child. She was alone in the world, while he still had his little girl. Trying to put himself in her place…losing Lily…he knew the pain would kill him. Nothing would stop it.

But maybe something new, some female friendships would help a little. So, much as he hated this flood of women invading his world, Noah made sure that Ivy’s breaks coincided with their visits, and if the visitor stayed a few minutes longer than usual, he didn’t say anything.

Ivy, however, protested. “Make sure you yell at me when fifteen minutes is up. I have work. You’re paying me,” she whispered when she passed him on her way to escort another woman to the house.

“What exactly do they talk about, if you don’t mind me asking?”

She shook her head. “Nothing. The weather. The ranch, and…nothing.”

But there was an evasive, almost angry look in her eyes. Noah remembered how Mary Sue and the others smiled at him so brilliantly. All of them were, he realized, single. An unpleasant suspicion began to form, one that grew even more the day Sandra Penway came to visit.

“It’s good to see you, Noah.”

He glanced toward Ivy.

“And Ivy,” Sandra said, but she wasn’t smiling.

“Sandra.” Ivy nodded. She didn’t look any happier than Sandra.

“How is Lily? Where is that little cutie? She’s just a doll. She’s just an angel,” Sandra cooed. “Let’s go see her together, Noah.”

“She’s napping.”

“Oh.” Sandra looked perturbed. “Okay. Will she be up soon? I really want to see her. And, of course, she’ll want to see her daddy right away.” She held out her hand to Noah as if to lead him to the house. “You and I will just talk until your little girl wakes up.”

Suddenly Ivy banged her shovel onto the ground. “I apologize, Sandra, but Mr. Ballenger told me that we need to rebuild the floodgate that washed out after the rain. You know how it is. It’s a job that won’t wait.”

“You and Darrell and Brody can do it,” Sandra said.

Okay, that was just wrong, Noah thought. “I don’t ask my hands to do things that I won’t do,” he said. That was true, but there was only one floodgate affected. It wasn’t enough work for all four of them.

But Ivy obviously wanted the woman gone. And frankly, so did he. Noah stuck to his guns.

When Sandra had gone, he turned to Ivy. “Thanks.” But he had to know more. “You don’t like Sandra. Has she been mean to you?”

Ivy shrugged. “She doesn’t like me.”

“Why?”

She frowned.

“What?” he asked.

“Basically, I’d say she covets you and she thinks I’m in her way,” Ivy confessed.

Yeah, he kind of got the coveting part. “That’s pretty disgusting for her to mistreat you because she wants something.”

“Yes, but on the other hand, I’m not any better. I lied about the floodgate.”

He shook his head. “You kept me from having to play nice guy to someone who isn’t all that nice. So we’ll make your story true. Brody has plenty of other things he can do.”

“I didn’t mean to make extra work for you.”

But work felt curiously like…not work as he and Ivy dived into the messy job of rebuilding the floodgate. They hadn’t spoken much during these days when all the women had been visiting, so as he and Ivy worked in concert, he turned to her. “Are you okay with the women of the town now? Tight?” he asked, twisting his fingers together the way she had the day she had lied and told him that.

She shook her head. “They’re polite, but I’m not the reason they’re here. I’m just the conduit. They want to know about you. And…they ask a lot of questions about you and Lily. I don’t like that.”

“Because you’re uncomfortable talking about her.” He hoped he managed not to show how much that bothered him.

“No, it’s not that. The things they ask…they want to know what you and Lily do together, what you’re like with her, that kind of thing. I remember that day in the store. Some of them, even though they seem entranced by the thought of you peeling off your shirt, were concerned that you weren’t raising Lily right. I don’t like thinking that they might be spying on you. That’s not right. You’re a good father.”

“How do you know that?” She was never with him when he was with Lily. Her eyes were dark pools of pain when she discussed his daughter, and he knew that a lot of that was because Lily was so close to the age her Bo would have been had he lived.

“I hear it when you talk about her. I know it,” she said simply, staring into his eyes.

Noah stared right back. Emotion flooded through him, even though he didn’t want it to. She was the last woman he could be attracted to, and yet he was.

“You don’t know much about me,” he argued. “I was a skirt chaser when I was young. Then I met a woman who was spending a summer with her relatives in the next county. She was French, exotic, exciting and different from anyone I’d ever met. I fell hard, and her actions seemed to indicate that she loved me, too, but when summer was over, she left and married a well-connected diplomat with an Ivy League background. She just used me to hold boredom at bay for the summer, and she was amused that I had thought she would settle for a rancher.” A bit like the way the women of the town were using Ivy to get to him, Noah realized. He hated that.

“I got in a lot of trouble during the next year. Gillian was a hard lesson to learn, but I thought I’d mastered it. Then I met Pamala. She was funny and quirky and in love with ranching, I thought. So I bit. Two months after giving birth to Lily, she left. She went running off to the next lifestyle she fell in love with—acting—and she left Lily without a backward glance. So yes, I love my child. She comes before everything. And no, I’m not remarrying or letting anyone separate me from Lily. Now, maybe you know enough about me to say that I’m a good father, because some days I am.”

“And the other days?”

“I’m totally petrified, don’t have a clue what I’m doing and am scared to death that I’ll somehow damage her.”

Ivy reached out and touched his cheek. “You haven’t damaged her yet. I know damaged. She’s not even close. I don’t think you could manage it if you tried.”

Maybe not, he thought when they had both gone back to work, but he could manage to do something stupid with a woman again, and he was perilously close to doing that with Ivy. Thank goodness he was stopped cold by the thought that Lily would be hurt if he brought a woman into their lives and that woman left.

Because Ivy was going to leave. She might think she was through with modeling, but he saw the way she walked and looked. Even her cowgirl clothes had class. He’d found articles on the Internet about her adventures in Paris and Rome. When she was finally through mourning, that life would come calling again. So he couldn’t allow himself to be foolish.

A part of him wished he’d stayed firm and not hired her. But mostly he was glad he’d given her the job. While she was here, she made him smile; she made him think. And…she was so alone. At least this job would do one good thing for her by enabling her to pay off the taxes and sell her ranch.

Noah tried to pretend that he wouldn’t even notice once she was gone. He didn’t succeed. In fact, when Noah woke up in the middle of the night, Ivy was already on his mind. He’d been dreaming about her, and she hadn’t been wearing a whole lot in his dream. That couldn’t be good.

He sat up with a grunt, flipped on the light and rubbed his eyes as if to rub away the image of Ivy dressed in a short, tight white dress and boots, her blond hair floating around her face as she beckoned to him like a Siren calling him to both ecstasy and doom.

“Stop it, Ballenger,” he muttered. “Now.” If he was going to think about Ivy, he could at least avoid thinking about her in erotic ways. That would only complicate things.

Besides, now that he was awake and more in control of himself, what he kept remembering from this latest conversation with Ivy was how determinedly nonchalant she had been when she’d told him that the women in town didn’t like her, and how haunted she had looked when she’d told him that she knew Lily wasn’t damaged because…

He didn’t have to finish the thought. Ivy knew about damaged little girls. She’d been a virtual prisoner on her father’s ranch and she’d had no female friends. And yet, what he couldn’t escape was how polite she’d been to those women even though she suspected their motives. She hadn’t called them out. She’d accepted the fact that they had used her as an excuse to get to him. And she’d done it while holding her head high.

Those women were using her, dismissing her, and he knew all too well how it felt to be used and dismissed. He hated the fact that his child would suffer because a woman had decided to use him as a temporary toy, then had walked away. It still burned that he hadn’t been able to stop that from happening, that it still messed with his life and his child’s life.

Using people…the very subject made him fume, but this situation with Ivy was different from his own. This time he was forewarned. Maybe he could stop it from happening.

Stay out of Ivy’s business, Ballenger, he told himself.

But thirty minutes later he was still raging about the fact that he had played a part in this scenario, even if it hadn’t been by choice. It was his fault that those women were using Ivy.

“Dammit,” he muttered. Ivy had gone through enough. She was more alone than any person on the ranch. He and Lily and Marta had each other. Darrell and Brody had friends. Ivy had no one. She’d grown up in this town having no one. And now when she’d lost so much already…she didn’t deserve to be treated as if she didn’t even matter. He knew how that could mangle a person’s pride, and he wouldn’t wish that kind of humiliation on another person.

It made him want to lash out, but Ivy hadn’t done that. She’d patiently listened to the women as if she didn’t know what they were up to. She’d behaved much better than they had.

Ivy, you could teach those women a thing or two, he thought. And just like that, an idea came to him. A way to turn the tables and give Ivy the upper hand in a very public way, maybe even make up for some of the distress she must have been feeling these past few days. He couldn’t go back and rewrite his own history. He had to live with his failures, but maybe he could rewrite this situation. It was a good idea or…maybe not. It was three in the morning. By tomorrow he might decide it was the dumbest idea in the world.

Ivy was up at the house three days later wondering why Marta had asked her to come there. She fidgeted with the pretty braided belt she’d worn. The gold-and-teal scarf at her throat felt a bit too tight. Going to the house still made her uncomfortable, and she hoped she wasn’t being called because another woman had shown up. How many single women could there be in a town the size of Tallula? Ivy didn’t know, but it sure seemed as if all of them wanted Noah. She braced herself for another woman trying to use her as a front.

But only Marta was there. “I just need a little help with this dishwasher, and Noah says that you’re very good at fixing things,” Marta said.

In the distance Ivy could hear Lily’s whispery little singing. She blinked.

“She’s a quiet child,” Marta said. “She’ll play by herself for hours. You don’t have to worry about her.”

Ivy knew Marta meant that she didn’t have to worry about Lily coming out of her room, but what Ivy suddenly worried about was the other—the fact that Lily played alone for so long that she never met other children.

Like me, Ivy thought, then immediately quashed the thought. It wasn’t the same. Noah loved Lily. Ivy’s father hadn’t loved anything but his ranch. Still, the soft singing tore at Ivy’s heart.

She was almost glad when the doorbell rang, but she kept working. Marta called out to her, and, resigned, Ivy came out from under the sink. She washed her hands, then turned to see a plain, pleasant-faced woman looking at her.

“I need help,” the woman said. “Noah said you might help me.”

O-kay, this is different.

“I don’t understand,” Ivy said. “What do you need me to do?”

“Make me pretty.”

Ivy blinked. “Excuse me?”

“I don’t mean beautiful pretty. I just mean different from what I am. And not forever. Just for a night.”

“You want to be Cinderella…to…”

Attract Noah, Ivy thought.

“To make my first wedding anniversary special for my husband,” the woman said.

Suddenly Ivy couldn’t help smiling. She shook her head. “I’m sorry, but could you back up and explain this to me again? What did Noah say to you?”

The woman blushed, and Ivy saw that she wasn’t so plain after all. “He didn’t exactly say anything to me, but my Jimmie was at the feed and seed and Noah was there fielding questions about you. He told the men that when you first started working here, he was afraid that all the women would be starstruck. They had access to a super-model, and he figured that women would be showing up asking advice on fashion or hair or makeup and turning his ranch into a sideshow, but no one did that. And even though women have visited here and you’ve been polite, not one has asked you to share all the tricks you’ve learned or asked you to give them a makeover. He couldn’t seem to figure it out.”

The woman stood there staring at Ivy, her voice a bit breathless. Nervous breathless, Ivy concluded.

She smiled at the woman again even as she wondered why Noah had told that story. He liked his ranch peaceful and quiet and…ranchy, she thought, making up her own word to describe the usually male world of cattle and horses and the men who tamed and traded and watched over them. Surely he knew that at least some of the men would repeat this story to their wives and girlfriends.

“So…you’re the first?” Ivy asked with a grin.

“Looks that way. I’m Diane Revner, by the way.”

“Nice to meet you, Diane. I’m afraid I don’t remember you.”

“That’s because I’m five years younger than you, so we didn’t have any real contact at school. I know why the women haven’t asked for your help. They don’t want to admit that they don’t know everything or that you know more than them. They don’t want it to look like they’re nobodies and you’re somebody. But I’m not proud. Jimmie and I are having a special day. I want to look nice, and not just plain old beauty-salon nice. I want to look special for Jimmie.”

“I’ll bet he thinks you look special already.”

The woman laughed. “He says he does, but I want to do better. Just so you know, I can pay you. If you’re working for Noah, you must not be rich anymore.”

Some people would have been offended by that statement, but Diane hadn’t said it in a rude way, just a commonsense way. That simple fact—Diane treating her like a regular person, not an oddity or outsider—warmed Ivy’s heart.

“You know, I think I’d like to do this just for the fun of it,” Ivy said. “But I have to tell you, no one has ever asked me to help make them look pretty. I might not be good at it.”

Diane looked indignant. “You were a model!”

“That’s just luck, good genes and a lot of hard work. Putting makeup on someone is an art, but we’ll see what we can do. Can you come back tonight when I’m done for the day?”

“Are you kidding? Ivy Seacrest is going to give me a makeover? Even if I had something planned, I’d cancel!” Diane’s smile was infectious, so when the door opened and Noah walked in, Ivy looked up at him, a full-fledged smile on her face.

“Hel-lo,” he said, as if he’d never met her before.

“Sorry, Diane, I have to get back to work,” Ivy said.

“Not a problem. Thank you so much, Ivy. I’ll see you tonight. Bye. Noah, please don’t make her work late today. Ivy is going to work her model magic on me.”

When she had gone, Ivy looked up at Noah. “Want to tell me why you’re promoting me as someone who can fix up the women of the town?”

“Just seemed natural,” he said, his gaze steady and noncommittal.

“Natural?”

“You’re a model, you’ve got women trailing out here all the time, and they haven’t treated you right. Why not earn a little money off them? It would be justice of a sort. You make them look pretty—they help you pay off your taxes. Finally, someone in the town would be doing something for you.”

Now she saw. “Don’t feel sorry for me, Noah.”

“I don’t.”

“You do.”

He slowly shook his head. “I’m indignant that you haven’t been made to feel welcome, but then I didn’t exactly welcome you here, either, did I? So maybe I feel a little guilt, too.”

She frowned, opening her mouth to speak. He held up one hand. “But don’t mistake that for pity. You’ve handled all this with grace and dignity. You are, as you said, a strong woman. You’re also talented, with skills and experience. So no, I don’t pity you. And maybe I have my own reasons for doing this, too. I’ve been used before, as you know. Call it surrogate justice. Besides, there’s nothing wrong with you mixing things up a little so that you’re the one with the power.”

“It sounds as if you have evil intentions. Don’t you like the women of the town?”

“I like them fine,” he said, which told her nothing. “But I don’t like injustice or nonchalant cruelty.”

“You’re thinking of Lily and how her mother abandoned her.”

“I’m thinking of a lot of things. Besides, there’s nothing mean about this.”

True enough. “So you planted the idea of me giving fashion and makeup advice. You went into town just for that?”

He looked uncomfortable, but then he seemed to shrug off his discomfort and grinned. “No sin in going to town.”

No, there wasn’t. All her urges to sin were right here, contained in a totally masculine package. Still, she knew that Noah didn’t just goof off and go to town on a regular basis. Brody had made that clear to her. And so had her conversation with the women at the store.

“So…did you just take a scattershot approach or did you purposely target Diane?”

“You say that as if I harmed her. I just knew that she’s always had a few stars in her eyes. She reads all the fan mags, but mostly I chose her because she’s a nice woman. And she doesn’t have any interest in me or mine.”

Ivy laughed. “In other words, she won’t pretend to be visiting me while ogling you.”

He crossed his arms over his chest. “If someone says they’re here to see you, they darn well should do the right thing and show an interest in you, not show up under false pretenses. I knew Diane would find you fifty times more interesting than me.”

Warmth spread through Ivy. He wanted her to get some genuine attention. “Thank you,” she said.

“For what? Sounds as if you have an evening of work ahead.”

Maybe. The thought of opening a makeup kit made her hands shake. Despite the fact that she had loved modeling and it had been the first time she had ever felt as if she had a place in life…that life was a reminder of another time, one where Bo lived. She couldn’t go there. But, Ivy admitted, there would be some regret at being the person behind the scenes this time. Maybe even some envy.

That was wrong. Diane was sweet and excited and genuinely friendly. If even a hint of melancholy threatened, Ivy intended to slap it away. Diane deserved better than that.

“Da,” a little voice said. Ivy automatically turned toward the doorway, where Lily had crept in unnoticed. The little girl was staring directly at her, all big blue eyes and blond curls. She was clutching a teddy bear, holding him upside down tight against her side, her chubby little hands curled around him. She must have noticed Ivy looking at the bear, because she held him out with a huge smile. “Bunny,” she said.

Ivy’s heart flipped over. Her throat closed up. There was a pain in her chest, and yet…this was a child, an innocent child. She couldn’t run away and risk hurting Lily’s feelings. “His name is Bunny?” she asked, with the best smile she could manage.

“Not Bunny. Buh-ny,” Lily enunciated with a chuckle. “See? Bunny?” and she held out one hand palm up as if she was sure she had cleared everything up.

“Sorry,” Noah said, reaching out and swinging Lily into his arms. “She’s quick as lightning, and she sneaks off now and then. Come on, squirt, let’s go put Barney to bed.”

“Yes. Bunny ti-red,” Lily agreed.

“Oh, I see. Barney,” Ivy said.

Lily squirmed in her father’s arms and turned so that she was facing Ivy. “Yes!” she squealed. “Bye-bye.”

“Bye, sweetie.”

Noah carried her away, his long legs quickly taking them both out of view.

Ivy dropped to a chair and stared at her hands. She could hear Noah murmuring. She heard the little girl say, “Wuv you, Da. Wuv you, Mar-ta.”

Ivy closed her eyes. She concentrated on breathing, on not thinking of Bo. She should get up and leave. But she didn’t. When Noah came back, she looked straight up into his eyes. “Don’t even consider apologizing. This is your home. It’s Lily’s home, and she’s adorable. I’m the intruder. I’m the one with the problem, and if the tables were turned, I wouldn’t want to feel I had to apologize because Bo had acted the way a child acts. She’s a sweetheart, Noah. I recognize that. How could I not?”

“But it still hurts to see her.”

“It’s more than that.”

“Tell me.”

She hesitated, couldn’t find her voice for a minute. She wasn’t sure how to say the next thing, so she moved to the door, pulled it open and stepped outside, dragging in great breaths of air.

Noah followed on her heels, shutting the door behind him. “Ivy? Are you okay? Is there anything I can do? Anything?”

And that concern jarred the words loose. “I didn’t save him. What if I could have prevented it?” Her words came out in a choked whisper.

“You couldn’t have. You weren’t even driving.” So he had obviously looked up the story—or been told about it.

“But I knew Alden liked to gamble, and that included gambling that he wouldn’t get pulled over for speeding, because he liked to drive too fast. He laughed whenever I asked him to slow down. And even though it’s been two years, sometimes I still wake up at night and dream that I can live that day over. In my dream I’m not distracted by something else. I’m paying attention and I realize that Alden is in a mood and I keep Bo home. That’s all it would have taken. Something that simple. Just that one little decision. If—”

“Don’t,” he said, grasping her arms in his big hands. “You didn’t kill your child, Ivy. You weren’t driving,” he reiterated. “And your husband wasn’t listening to you.”

Ivy wanted nothing more than to listen to Noah, to lean into his big body and let him comfort her. He was right. She knew that. And yet he was wrong, too. When Bo had been born, she had promised herself that she would never do anything to hurt him. She had arrogantly believed that she was a much better mother than her own had been. And now she couldn’t trust herself. She could never risk having and losing a child again. How could anyone risk having that happen to them again?

Still, the incident today had changed things.

“I don’t want you to hide Lily anymore. This is her home, her ranch, her everything. I’ll be the one to make the adjustments. If our paths cross…well, I think I handled it okay today. I didn’t make her uncomfortable, did I?”

He smiled gently and tucked a finger beneath her chin. “You didn’t. She liked you.”

“How could you tell?”

“I just can. She talked to you. Usually she has to meet a person several times before her shy wears off.”

Ivy smiled a bit at that. “Well, I’d better get back to work. I take it that the dishwasher wasn’t really broken. That’s why Marta called me in.”

“Not broken, I don’t think. But I’ll check.” He turned to go.

“Noah?”

He turned back.

“Thank you.”

“What for?”

For not being angry that I have so much trouble being near your little sweetheart of a daughter. But there’d been too much emotion coursing through her this morning already. She’d been on the verge of throwing herself into his arms only moments ago. She needed to lighten things up.

“For going to the feed and seed and telling tales. I like Diane.”

“And you don’t mind the extra work after hours?”

“It won’t be work. And she’s only one woman.”

“Hmm,” he said.

“What does that mean?”

“Maybe…there were a lot of men other than Jimmie at the feed and seed. Some of them have wives.”

Ivy smiled. “Well, I doubt that any more women will show up. Diane is unique. But if they do come for makeovers, at least they won’t be pretending to talk to me while staring at your muscles. I’ve been tempted to say something really outrageous just to see if they’re actually paying attention.”

He grinned at that. “Maybe I should just stare at your… um…muscles while talking to the women and see how they like it.”

Ivy opened her mouth, then shut it. Walking away, heading she didn’t know where, she hoped Noah didn’t put words to deeds. If he started giving her another one of those lazy looks that roamed up and down her body, she might make a fool of herself in front of someone who would carry the tale back to every other woman in town. The very thought made her hyperventilate.

It also made her think of Noah’s muscles and his strong hands.

She ordered herself to behave. A woman had to be on her toes when she spent her days around animals that could crush a person without even realizing it. “So no more Noah stuff,” she ordered.

“Hmm, wonder what she means by that, Brody,” Darrell said. Ivy hadn’t realized the men were right inside the barn.

“It means I’m in the mood to crack some heads together if you two insist on teasing me and listening in on my mutterings,” she said with a wicked grin.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Brody answered, pretending ignorance. “I didn’t hear any muttering. Did you say something, Ivy?”

“If I did, I didn’t say anything important,” she said. That much was true. She couldn’t let Noah become important. Her heart couldn’t handle any more breaks.



Noah was beginning to wonder what he was doing. A couple of weeks ago he’d been minding his own business, with no thoughts of anything but the ranch and Lily.

Now he was thinking of how warm Ivy’s skin had been against his palms through the cotton of her shirt. He was remembering a pair of tortured blue-violet eyes wondering if she’d missed a chance to save her child. He was going to the feed and seed, acting totally out of character and doing really stupid things all because he wanted some justice for her.

Careful, buddy, he told himself. Don’t do anything you’ll end up regretting. He really should just stick to Lily and the ranch. Period. Especially since being a father was such a seat-of-the-pants thing with him. Was he wrong keeping Lily here instead of sending her out into the world…or at least into Tallula? He didn’t know. All he knew was that Lily was his. That first step into the world of Tallula and other people would be her first step away from him. Was it wrong to want to stave that off a little longer?

Maybe, but a stubborn part of him didn’t want to even be wondering these things. These questions about how he should handle Lily hadn’t come from inside him. They had come via Ivy, the same woman he’d just been warning himself about.

Warnings about Ivy didn’t seem to work. There was something beyond physical beauty that drew him. So when Diane drove up, Noah’s antennae went on alert. He was fully aware when Ivy, dressed in a white T-shirt and jeans, walked out to her car to greet her guest. Diane was squealing and practically dancing around with excitement. Ivy looked a bit nervous, but she smiled at Diane.

The women retired to Ivy’s cottage, and when they emerged a couple of hours later, Diane looked radiant. Her hair was in a sleek new style, and Ivy had done something to her face that made her look slightly exotic. Polished. Pretty, Noah supposed, although he was already starting to judge pretty by Ivy standards.

“I look so good. Jimmie is going to eat me up,” Diane said. Then she shrieked with laughter and gave Ivy a hug before she rushed home to her Jimmie.

Noah started to turn toward the house. He was a bit embarrassed to admit that he’d been spending far more time than necessary making certain all was in order in the barn just so he could ensure everything had turned out all right with Diane and Ivy. He was, after all, responsible for the two women meeting. He would have hated it if things had backfired.

But they seemed good. He smiled to himself with satisfaction and took a few steps toward the house.

“Noah?”

“Ivy?” he answered, turning toward her.

“Thank you once again,” she said. “That was fun.”

“You did a good job. Jimmie’s going to love your handiwork. Not that he’ll hesitate for a moment to mess up what you spent two hours fixing.”

Ivy laughed. “That’s okay. Diane would be disappointed if he didn’t get so involved he forgot to be careful. Diane is a sweetie, but I think she might also be a bit of a wild woman.”

Noah agreed. “What kind of woman are you?” he asked, wondering what he was doing asking something like that…besides running toward the flames.

Ivy studied him. She took two steps toward him. Then she stopped. “I’m a woman who’s going to retreat before she does something that might not be smart.” Then she turned, walked up the path to her cottage and went inside.

Noah swore beneath his breath—for asking the question and because he knew that he would lie awake half the night wondering what it was Ivy would have done that wouldn’t have been smart. And even though he knew she’d been right to retreat, he also wished she hadn’t. Because right now he was burning to do all kinds of things with Ivy that they would both regret once morning came.

But when morning came, Noah found that he had a whole different kind of problem.




Chapter Six


WORK STARTED EARLY on a ranch, and Ivy was checking the irrigation lines on an alfalfa field when her cell phone rang.

“We have a situation here. You need to come to the house,” Noah said in that deep gravelly voice that—blast it!—made Ivy want to purr.

“A situation?” Immediately all sorts of terrible things started going through her head, though Noah didn’t sound panicked. Not that he would. A panicky man wasn’t a good rancher. Noah was a good rancher.

“Nothing bad,” he said quickly. “God, no. I should have led into that better. Let’s just say that Jimmie devoured Diane like a chocolate sundae with extra sprinkles, and now you have a restless group of potential customers waiting for you to transform them into swans.”

“I’m working the alfalfa field,” she said.

“And I’m grateful. It’s what I pay you for. But Ivy, today…I just don’t have a way with an eyelash curler or fingernail polish. Seriously, you have to come save me.”

She could hear the humor in his voice. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” she asked.

“I might be thinking that there’s some poetic justice in the women who scorned you having to backpedal a little, yes.”

“Well, I don’t know how I can help them, anyway. Diane was different. I had some free time last night, but sometimes it’s late when I finish work. There might not be time to do a full cocoon-to-butterfly transformation. Besides…”

“What?”

“What if even one of them hates it? I might never hear the end of it.”

“I hadn’t thought of that. So…we’ll limit the time to one day. Maybe you’ll give a workshop. Charge a fee, give them a few tips, supervise them putting on their own makeup. No one can be upset with you when they’ll be the ones doing the grunt work.”

Ivy gave a low whistle. “Noah, I have to tell you, if this ranching thing goes bust, you could get some serious work as a talent agent.”

He laughed. “Think about the workshop, but in the meantime, come see your adoring public for a few minutes.”

He hung up.

Ivy stared at the phone. She wasn’t sure she wanted to have a go at it with the women of the town again, but Noah had a point. Her goal was to pay off the taxes. This would help. Besides, by dawdling, she was leaving her boss responsible for entertaining women who were here to see her.

Even the married women would, most likely, be ogling Noah. Hadn’t they all been regretting the fact that he rarely came to town? So wouldn’t they want an eyeful when they actually got the chance for some time with him?

As Ivy climbed into the truck and drove down the road, she wondered what the women were saying to Noah. Were they quizzing him on his parenting skills, passing judgment?

Ivy gritted her teeth. “Okay, it’s absolutely my duty to sidetrack them from that,” she told a calf and his mother she was driving past. “A man shouldn’t have to explain every move he makes where his family is concerned.”

Within minutes she pulled up in front of the ranch house, the pickup truck spitting gravel. Marta let her in, and she moved into the living room, where she could hear voices.

Noah was shepherding Lily around, and all the women seemed to be fixated on the pretty little girl.

But as soon as she moved near, Noah gave his daughter a kiss and signaled Marta, who took Lily off for a nap. Suddenly Ivy was on center stage.

“I understand you want makeup advice?” she said.

“We liked what you did with Diane,” Melanie Pressman said. “But I’m only here to scope out possibilities.” She looked at Ivy’s clothes, her disapproval clear.

“Darn, why didn’t I wear my stiletto heels and that sexy red cocktail dress out to the fields?” Ivy said. “In the future, I need to remember to dress better for the cattle.”

The rest of the women laughed. Even Melanie laughed just a little.

“Well,” Ivy said, thinking about Noah’s good idea, “the key to looking good long-term isn’t having someone else apply your makeup. It’s learning how to make the magic happen yourself. So if any of you are interested, we could have a workshop at my cottage on my day off.”

“You can use this house,” Noah cut in. “It has more space than the cottage.”

Ivy started to protest, but Sandra was faster. “That is so generous of you, Noah,” she gushed, “but not surprising coming from a man like you.”

What did Sandra mean by “a man like you”? Ivy wondered, but of course she knew. It meant that Sandra was trying to suck up to Noah and talk him into her bed.

The thought made Ivy want to step right between Noah and Sandra. Stupid thought. Don’t you dare, she told herself.

By the time she’d talked herself out of making a fool of herself, the other women had already agreed that Noah’s idea was best. The event had been moved to the ranch house.

“Of course, you’ll want a fee,” Alicia said. “You’ve got bills to pay, and this kind of expertise would cost a fortune in New York. You just let us know how much.”

To her own surprise, Ivy shook her head. “Oh. No. Let’s just say—that is, this first one’s on me.” Had she really said that when Alicia was right and she had just been thinking the same thing a few minutes earlier? Yes, she had, even if it didn’t make sense. Maybe it was newcomer’s nerves—she’d never taught anyone how to do anything. Or maybe her response had been because a deep-seated part of her didn’t feel comfortable accepting money for the kinds of rituals these women had shared as girls. That sharing of hair and makeup and clothing that she’d never shared but which was a part of most girls’ teen years.

Stupid. I don’t care about that, she told herself. And this isn’t the same at all. They wouldn’t have approached you if they hadn’t wanted something from you. But she still didn’t name a price.

Instead, she did another dumb thing. She looked directly into Noah’s eyes. He was giving her an “are you kidding me?” look and shaking his head. But he was also grinning. Okay, she was pathetic, wasn’t she? She needed the money—but she wasn’t going to allow herself to regret her decision. She just hoped that her choice didn’t partly stem from a desire to prolong her time with Noah. Not accepting money for the workshop meant that she would have to work longer at the ranch to earn her tax money.

Don’t let it be that, she thought. She wanted to get away from here quickly, didn’t she?

“That’s very generous of you, Ivy,” Alicia said.

“It is,” Melanie grumbled, and a few other women also thanked Ivy. Sandra merely gave her a tight smile and a nod.

When the women had gone, Noah walked up to her. “Lady, I think you’d better go back to modeling when you leave here, because business just isn’t going to be your forte.”

Against her will, she touched her hand to her face. “Not going to happen.”

“You’re very beautiful, Ivy,” he said softly.

She looked up into his eyes. “Modeling requires the illusion of perfection.”

“Do you miss it?” he asked.

She wanted to say no. “Sometimes,” she confessed. “It was exciting and it gave me validation and a place where I belonged. But I’m fine.”

“I think you’re wrong about having to be perfect,” Noah said. “The world is full of imperfect women and more and more of them are demanding models who look real. Not that I’m an expert, but I read the papers. I see the reports on television.”

Ivy couldn’t help herself then. She reached up and cupped her palm around his jaw. “You’re a good man, Noah.”

His eyes turned dark amber at her touch; his lashes drifted down. He turned his head and kissed the palm of her hand, sending heat rippling through her body. “Is that a nice way of telling me I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about?”

“It means you’re a good man,” she repeated noncommittally. She wasn’t quite sure what she was even saying. His lips were still just a feather’s touch from her skin. She wanted him to kiss her again. But this time she wanted him to kiss her lips. Maybe more.

Her desire must have shown in her eyes, because Noah groaned and broke away. “I may appear to be a good man, but I don’t feel like one. What I am at the moment is a man who needs to remember who and what he really is.”

“And what’s that?”

“A rancher to the bone. This land has been in my family for generations. A Ballenger has always been at the helm. I love this place. I belong to this place. The fact that I’m…distracted right now doesn’t change things. We both know that I’m the rancher and you’re the model. And Lily is stuck dead in the middle because she’s still so innocent that she could decide she likes you, latch on and get hurt when you go.”

Ivy sucked in a deep breath. She felt as if she’d been kicked. “I would never put a child in a position where she could be hurt.”

Noah swore. “You know I didn’t mean it that way, or if you didn’t…well, there’s just another example of how different we are. I rush into things like a bull and say things that come out wrong. I’m a harsh man of the land and you’re…not.”

Ivy nearly smiled. “No, I’m not a ‘man of the land.’”

“Don’t be cute.” He gave her a smoldering look that set her blood to racing.

“Okay. I promise I won’t be cute.”

“Ivy…” He groaned. “You make me crazy. You have from the start. I didn’t want to hire you.”

“But you did.”

“Yes.”

“And now you regret it.”

“Yes. No. Yes. Come here.” He slipped an arm around her waist and drew her to him. He rested his forehead against hers. Then, without warning, he tugged her closer. His mouth crushed hers. His taste was hot, smoky, masculine…Ivy thought she might faint from the pleasure as he nibbled at her lips, stroked his big hand down her back and over her hips.

“Kiss me again,” she whispered when he released her, but she didn’t wait for him to follow her instructions. She cupped his face in both her palms and pressed her lips to his. She licked his lower lip.

He nipped at her. Somehow he got even closer, so close that she could feel every contour of his body, the hard muscled planes, the desire he felt for her. If two bodies could have produced steam, the two of them would have been enveloped in a mist cloud in a matter of seconds.

Instead, a horse whickered in the distance. Lily’s and Marta’s voices drifted in.

Ivy and Noah separated. “I’m sorry,” he said. “One minute I tell you I can’t do this and the next minute I’m grabbing you.”

“It was a mutual grab,” she said, and his lips quirked up in a smile.

“I’m sorry about what I said about Lily, but…this ranch is hers. I’m the current owner, but it’s her inheritance. That and the blood that runs through me marries me to this land. And I have a bad habit of linking up with women who anyone with sense could see aren’t made for ranching. That’s my problem—my fatal flaw, I guess—to keep living this situation over and over. I’ve made a vow to remember what I am and what I’m not from now on. I can’t get involved with anyone temporary ever again. Maybe if it were just me at risk…” He looked at her lips again, his eyes smoldering even more.

“But you have a child,” she said, backing farther away. Because he was right.

Noah frowned. “Nothing will ever change the fact that Lily’s mother deserted her. And someday I’ll have to help her get past the hurt that comes with that. I can’t put her in the position of losing someone she loves again. There are lots of things I don’t know about parenting, but I know I can’t risk her that way.”

“That’s why you’re alone.”

“Partly.”

She quirked an eyebrow. He shook his head. “I’ve talked about myself too much today. I’d better get back to work.”

And she, Ivy decided, had better get back to sanity. She’d come here to earn money, to leave her past behind and help herself find a future. She’d promised herself that she was through with men, because men had taken everything she valued and loved. Yet she’d turned down money today and she had practically invited Noah to make love with her when she’d never been the type to take intimacy lightly.

She so didn’t want to analyze that last fact. So what did she want to do? Or…what smart thing did she want to do?

But her brain wouldn’t function. She needed to get smart fast. Earn money. Leave. Never come back. It was a mantra she intended to keep repeating. It was her plan.

“From now on I’m sticking to the plan,” she muttered as she headed back to work. But before she could do that, she had to get past the free workshop she was giving.

I wonder where Noah will be while that’s going on? she thought. Probably somewhere far, far away. What man would stick around while a bunch of women took over his house to do makeovers?




Chapter Seven


“WOOK, DA,” LILY SAID. “Want wook.”

Noah gave his daughter a grim smile. “We can’t look, sweetheart. Those women would kick our…behinds if we dared to go in there while they had cream and stuff on their faces and their hair in whatever state women’s hair is in just before the magic occurs and they finally get it the way they want it.”

Noah was flying blind here. He didn’t know what he was talking about, but he remembered too well how Pamala had stomped around if he caught her wearing what she called her beauty mud or when she was touching up her hair color and had some sort of cap on her head with strands of hair sticking out. He was pretty darn sure that Melanie Pressman would put the fear of God into him if he ever caught her like that.

He was equally sure that Ivy would look sexy even with her hair in one of those caps. And if her naked body was dunked in mud…

Whoa, Ballenger, put a stop sign on that thought. This is not the time. Although the truth was that there wasn’t a good time for those kinds of thoughts. He was never going to see Ivy dunked in mud. Or naked. Or…

“Da, peez.” Lily was looking up at him with those big blue eyes, and his heart nearly broke. He wanted to give his child anything she wanted. And right now she wanted to see the women in the other room.

“Lily,” he said, hugging her, “let’s go for a walk. Or we’ll play on your swings. Okay?”

“’Kay,” she said, although he could tell she was just being nice. If she’d been older, she would probably have been sighing with resignation. Man, did he have a way with females or what? Even his own daughter had to take pity on him and cut him some slack.

“Maybe we could look at the horses, too,” he said, taking her hand and trying to come up with a better treat than the swings.

She nodded solemnly. It occurred to him that his daughter was pretty serious at times. Probably because she spent so much time with adults. Again, Ivy’s suggestion that Lily might like to play with other kids came to him. Was it already that time? Was he just being a selfish jerk keeping her here on the ranch with him all the time?

“Bwooz,” Lily said.

Noah shook his head, not understanding.

“Bwooz,” Lily repeated. And finally, “Bwoo-ooz.” She galloped around, mimicking a horse. Or at least as much as a chubby, tottering two-year-old could manage.

Uh-oh. He was going to have to play “bad dad.” Twice in five minutes. “Not Bruiser. He’s too mean. Maybe Cornbread.”

Lily was on the verge of answering when a shriek and then laughter came from the next room. His daughter turned around and zipped away, heading toward the living room.

“Lily,” he called. “Come back here right now.”

Lily, in typical two-year-old fashion, interpreted that to mean Run Faster. Before he could react, she had covered ten feet of space and had made it partly down the hall. Not to the living room—but obviously his own voice had carried to that room. Just as he caught Lily and swung her little body up into his arms, he looked up into a sea of female faces.

For some reason he didn’t want to examine, he looked for Ivy’s face among them. And when he located her, it was her he spoke to. “I’m sorry. She’s just really curious about what’s going on.”

He expected Ivy to nod or say that’s all right and then lead her brood back to their business. Instead, she bit her lip and zeroed in on Lily. “The forbidden is always enticing,” she said. “It’s okay for her to come in.”

He could see that Ivy was nervous, but…oh, there it was. The memory of how her father had kept her from getting to be a regular girl. Dammit. How could he fight that? He couldn’t. Especially because she was right. Lily’s eyes were glowing with excitement.

“If you’re sure she won’t bother you,” he said.

The women automatically began to exclaim that of course they would love to have Lily join them.

And, of course, he was reluctant to leave her in the company of women she really didn’t know. Lily was adventurous to a point. With Marta not there, his child would most likely enjoy herself until she realized that no one she knew was in the room. Plus, these women were busy. Who would keep Lily out of trouble and safe?

No one seemed to think of that, and he didn’t know what to do. As a male, his presence would be taboo. He would just have to take Lily elsewhere. Probably crying at being denied a treat.

“I think…maybe a male opinion on our progress would be a welcome addition, too,” Ivy suddenly said. “I mean, how can we know if we’ve achieved our goal of looking our best if we don’t have any guys to critique our work?”

The look she gave him was both mischievous and determined. She must know that he was going to be like a ship without a sail offering his opinion on women’s beautification techniques, but it was almost as if she’d read his mind regarding Lily. The idea that Ivy could read his thoughts was unnerving. If that were true, she’d know what he was thinking right now was that she looked incredibly beddable in that long white silk robe she was wearing. He wondered what she had on underneath.

Noah tried to blank the thought from his mind. “Always glad to be of service,” he said. “Thank you for accommodating Lily, ladies.”

Cries of “she’s a love, she’s adorable, of course we want her here” were uttered, and Noah soon found himself seated in his living room, which had been transformed into something he didn’t even recognize. The women had brought folding tables, draped them in white cloth and set up makeup stations. There was a makeshift changing area behind a room divider.

The atmosphere was cheerful. Ivy was fully in charge, too, he noticed. For once, she held the power. “Alicia, be bolder with that lip color. You have the complexion to carry something bright. Melanie, look! You have gorgeous cheekbones, and now we can see them. Here, try this teal dress on. It’s your color.” And “Sandra, not too much liner. A bit more subtle. There, that’s perfect.”

The women asked questions. They were almost like children. At one point Melanie even pulled on Ivy’s arm to get her attention.

At that, he grinned, and Ivy gave him a look. “No more feed and seed for you,” she said. “I must have been insane.” Even though she seemed to be enjoying herself.

“What?” Melanie asked.

“Nothing. Just a stupid joke,” Ivy said, and Noah noticed that Sandra gave her an evil glare. He hoped Sandra didn’t try to cause trouble for Ivy. She’d had enough heartache in her life already. So he was glad when Ivy smiled. Then she raised one brow and mouthed “Payback.” Or at least that’s what it looked like.

Indeed, in the next minute Ivy turned to Noah. “What do you think?” she asked, having Melanie try on another outfit. “The black leather jacket or the white one?”

She was laughing at having trapped him. Her eyes glowed. It was the lightest he had seen her since she’d arrived, so of course he had to play along. She’d thought she was going to discombobulate him. Two can play at that game, Ivy, he thought.

“Well,” he said, rubbing his neck as if he was nervous, “if I was a woman, I’d probably choose the white one. But I’m a man.” He gave Ivy a long, long look. “And if I were Bob, I’d choose the black leather. Maybe pair it with a short, tight black leather skirt and some thigh-high boots.”




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