The Maverick′s Return
The Maverick's Return
Marie Ferrarella
Congratulations…it's a girl! Talk about mending fences—have you heard that rugged rancher Daniel Stockton is back in town? It's been ten years since Dan left Rust Creek Falls with Anne Lattimore's heart in tow. She soon married someone else and had a child, but their marriage didn't last. We here at the Gazette think we know why. It has something to do with Anne's beautiful daughter, Janie…Now that Dan has returned, will Anne find the courage to forgive him—and tell him that sweet Janie is really his? Will Dan find the courage to ask for a second chance? Stay tuned, you hopeful romantics, to see if love really can conquer all!
Congratulations...it’s a girl!
RUST CREEK RAMBLINGS
Talk about mending fences—have you heard that rugged rancher Daniel Stockton is back in town? It’s been ten years since Dan left Rust Creek Falls with Anne Lattimore’s heart in tow. She soon married someone else and had a child, but their marriage didn’t last. We here at the Gazette think we know why. It has something to do with Anne’s beautiful daughter, Janie...
Now that Dan has returned, will Anne find the courage to forgive him—and tell him that sweet Janie is really his? Will Dan find the courage to ask for a second chance? Stay tuned, you hopeful romantics, to see if love really can conquer all!
“Looks like you’ve been cleared to go,” he told her as the other woman stepped away.
Anne felt butterflies fluttering in the pit of her stomach. Why did she feel as if she was about to go out on a first date? She wasn’t, for heaven’s sake. This wasn’t even a date at all. She was just getting a cup of coffee with someone who had once meant a great deal to her.
Someone you had a baby with, the voice in her head reminded her.
With effort, Anne forced a ghost of a smile to her lips as she said, “Just let me get my purse and then I’m ready.”
After taking out her purse from one of the bottom drawers, Anne rose to her feet. She glanced at the phone, willing it to ring.
It didn’t.
She had temporarily run out of possible excuses.
“Okay,” she told Danny as she came around to the front of the reception desk, “let’s get that cup of coffee.”
Taking her elbow to help guide her out of the clinic, Dan murmured, “I thought you’d never ask.”
The butterflies went into high gear.
* * *
Montana Mavericks: The Great Family Roundup—Real cowboys and real love in Rust Creek Falls!
The Maverick’s Return
Marie Ferrarella
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
USA TODAY bestselling and RITA® Award–winning author MARIE FERRARELLA has written more than two hundred and seventy-five books for Mills & Boon, some under the name Marie Nicole. Her romances are beloved by fans worldwide. Visit her website, www.marieferrarella.com (http://www.marieferrarella.com).
To
Marcia Book Adirim,
Whose multilevel mind
Always leaves me in complete
Awe
Contents
Cover (#u0dded4b7-887f-5c48-a274-230fd0209ff4)
Back Cover Text (#u53746a76-07f8-5240-ac15-34da996fa8a9)
Introduction (#u95cb778c-889c-5047-a0b7-bb4f61300b47)
Title Page (#ued7e7aac-bb7b-5175-bd73-b687ea4bc834)
About the Author (#u07fd8c07-7c05-557a-9f22-07b9d3bf4343)
Dedication (#u2ea4984a-7432-5bd2-aadb-e015ad00260f)
Prologue (#uf46728b3-dcf3-57d0-9b21-c604e22373e2)
Chapter One (#u5879398e-d597-58dd-a128-24a7b922faa0)
Chapter Two (#ua90e8eec-1c03-5f7d-a710-02b19e5172d8)
Chapter Three (#u1b1b9a5e-7877-536c-b8ae-9fea235d9bf9)
Chapter Four (#u757d0fca-41cb-5c27-846d-23861fff861a)
Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fifteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Sixteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seventeen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eighteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)
Extract (#litres_trial_promo)
Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
Prologue (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
Daniel Stockton wearily walked into the log cabin he lived in at the Comanchero Ranch. For the last ten years, he’d been in charge of booking vacations for city dwellers who yearned to sample the cowboy life for a week or two and pretend they lived back in the days of the old Wild West. The dude ranch, one of Colorado’s most popular, was currently in the height of its busy season. Attendance was at an all-time high and would probably remain so until somewhere around the end of next month.
As he concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other on the way to his secondhand sofa, Dan felt as if all those years had been packed into this last week and a half.
He sighed and collapsed on the worn, cracked sofa in the center of his small living area.
His stomach rumbled, asking to be appeased, but for now, Dan felt as if he couldn’t move more than the first two fingers of his right hand. The hand that was currently wrapped around the remote control for the TV that had been in the cabin when he’d initially moved in. The cabin was too quiet and he just wanted some background noise to distract him.
Even now, after all these years, he didn’t like being alone with his thoughts.
Aiming the remote at the twenty-four-inch TV screen, he pressed the power button, content to watch whatever program came on. He just wanted some company he didn’t have to explain anything to. The tourists who came to the ranch always seemed to be filled to the brim with questions.
Most of the time, that didn’t bother him, but there was this one family this last week that had a kid with them—Harlan—who just wouldn’t stop asking questions no matter what. The kid, all of eleven or twelve, was obviously trying to trip him up.
Dan felt as if his head was throbbing and, quite possibly, on the verge of exploding.
The pay at the Comanchero Ranch was fairly decent and he did get to spend most of his life on horseback, which he loved, but there were times—like this last week—when the loneliness caught up to him, wrapping its tentacles around him so hard he could scarcely breathe. That was when he found his patience to be thin and in relatively short supply. And when that happened, his tolerance went out the window.
This afternoon he’d come dangerously close to telling Harlan’s parents that they needed to take their son in hand and teach him some much-needed manners. But he’d managed to hold his tongue long enough to get those “dudes” back to the ranch house where they were staying.
However, it had been close. Closer than he really liked.
“Get a grip, Dan. This isn’t a bad job. And you sure as hell can’t afford to lose it,” he told himself as he got up again.
His stomach was growling way too much. It was time to rummage through his refrigerator and find something that could pass for food.
As he walked to the small refrigerator, his back was to the TV when he heard it.
The voice from his past.
Dan froze, listening. Convinced that he was imagining things.
It couldn’t be, he told himself. It was the loneliness getting to him, wearing away his edge, nothing more.
He forced himself to proceed to the kitchen and open the refrigerator. Instead of getting something to eat, he took out a bottle of root beer, twisted off the cap and closed the refrigerator door.
He’d just put the bottle to his lips when he heard it again.
The voice from his past.
“This is Travis Dalton and you’re watching The Great Roundup. We’re coming to you live from Rust Creek Falls, Montana, and I’m here talking to Jamie Stockton, the valiant dad of year-old triplets. Jamie, until just recently, had to juggle being both father and mother to these fine, hearty little human beings. Tell us how that felt, Jamie.”
“I don’t mind admitting that I was pretty overwhelmed at first,” the young man the narrator had addressed as Jamie answered.
The root beer slipped from Dan’s hand, meeting the floor at an obtuse angle. Mercifully, it avoided shattering. Instead, a small shower of foam emerged from the bottle, christening his boots and the bottom of his jeans.
Dan didn’t notice.
His eyes were glued to the TV, staring at the screen.
Staring at Jamie Stockton.
His younger brother.
The wave of loneliness Dan had been harboring turned into a twelve-foot sweeping tidal wave, all but drowning him in memories.
Memories he had been struggling so hard to bury and ignore for the last twelve years.
Listening to the voice of the young man telling his story caused those years to instantly melt away as if they had never happened.
Except that they had.
Chapter One (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
Daniel shifted from foot to foot, standing before the closed ranch house door.
His brother’s door.
He had absolutely no idea what to expect. What if, when his brother Jamie opened the door and saw who was knocking, he slammed it in his face?
Of course, there was a small chance, one that he was silently rooting for, that Jamie would mercifully allow him to plead his case.
The way he felt, however, the odds were probably against that happening.
It had taken Dan more than a whole month of intense soul searching to finally get up the nerve to take this giant step, to leave Colorado and travel all this distance back to Rust Creek Falls, Montana.
Back to his hometown and his roots.
Back to the place where it had all fallen apart twelve years ago.
Ironically, the very things that were drawing him back to Rust Creek Falls were the same things that had caused him to stay away so long in the first place.
The same things that made him hesitate reconnecting this last whole month.
Dan had raised his hand to knock on the door a total of three times now. And all three times his courage had failed him, causing him to drop his hand back down again to his side.
Come on. You didn’t come all this way back to Montana just to chicken out at the last minute. This isn’t you.
Except that, maybe, it was. Why else had he not tried to get back in contact with any of his siblings for over a decade?
The first two years of his self-imposed exile he’d been with his two older brothers, Luke and Bailey. But then they had gone their own separate ways, too, leaving him to fend for himself.
The simple truth of it was he was tired of being alone. Tired of having no one who shared at least part of the same memories from his childhood and adolescence.
Tired of not having any family.
It would have been different if he’d never had any siblings. He had very nearly made his peace with that. After all, he really had no idea where any of his brothers or sisters were anymore.
But then he’d heard Jamie’s voice on that broadcast last month and everything had changed.
Suddenly, he felt as if he was part of something again. He knew that at least Jamie was still back in Rust Creek Falls. All he had to do was reach out, reestablish that familial connection with his younger brother and just like that, he would have a family again.
It had sounded so easy when he had first thought of it. But now he wasn’t so sure.
At least find out if he’ll talk to you.
Taking a deep breath, Dan raised his hand again and this time, his knuckles finally made contact with the door, creating a rhythmic sound as he knocked.
He could feel his heart pounding as he stood there, waiting.
It was late afternoon, almost early evening. What if there was no one at home? What if Jamie and his triplets were away on vacation? After all, that could be a possibility, Dan thought.
Or what if Jamie was home, opened the door and then told him to go to hell?
Dan’s breath caught in his throat, all but turning solid.
What if—?
Suddenly, there was no more time for speculation or waffling. No more time for hypothetical what-ifs. The door opened and an older, adult version of the boy he had left behind twelve years ago, the young man he’d seen more than a month ago on his TV, was standing in the doorway, looking at him.
For a moment, the expression on Jamie Stockton’s face was blank. It was the kind of expression a person wore when they opened their door to someone they didn’t recognize.
But then, in the next moment, a multitude of emotions washed over Jamie’s face in quick succession, one after the other.
Like a man caught in a dream, Jamie stared at him. And then, finally, he asked hoarsely, “Daniel?”
Dan’s lips quirked in a quick, nervous smile. “Yeah. It’s me,” he confirmed, still feeling incredibly uneasy and uncertain about this reunion that he had instigated.
And then Dan cleared his throat and forced himself to push on and say something further. “I would have called ahead first, but I didn’t know how you would react to seeing me and I didn’t want to take a chance on you turning—”
Dan didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence. Whatever else he was going to say about his concerns regarding their first meeting in twelve years evaporated when Jamie pulled him into his arms and enfolded him in a giant bear hug.
“Oh my God, Danny. It really is you!” Jamie cried, holding on to him tightly, as if he was afraid that if he opened his arms, his older brother would suddenly just vanish.
When after a couple of minutes Jamie gave no sign of releasing him, Dan finally had to say, “Um, Jamie, I think you’re crushing my ribs.”
“Oh, right. Sorry.” Jamie let his arms drop. He took a step back and looked at Dan. Disbelief highlighted his face as his eyes raked over every square inch of his older brother. “It’s just that I never thought I’d see you again. Come in, come in,” he urged, gesturing into his house even as he ushered Dan in and closed the door behind him.
“Is everything okay? Are you here for a visit? Are you staying?” And then Jamie stopped asking questions. He took a deep breath, as if trying to get hold of himself. “Sorry, I don’t mean to overwhelm you. It’s just that there are so many things I want to know.”
Before Dan could say a single word in response, Jamie broke out in another huge smile. “Damn, but it’s good to see you!” he cried, pulling Dan into another heartfelt, although slightly less rib-crushing, bear hug.
This time, he released Dan without being prompted. A long sigh escaped him as he took a step back again.
“You’ve lost weight,” Jamie finally noted.
“I wasn’t exactly fat to begin with,” Dan reminded his brother with a self-conscious laugh.
“No, you weren’t. But I don’t recall your face looking this gaunt before—Damn, it’s so great to see you,” Jamie exclaimed again. “I thought... Well, for a while, I thought—” Jamie waved his hand. “Never mind what I thought. You’re alive and you’re here and that’s all that counts.” He blinked back tears that threatened to spill out. “Sit down. Make yourself comfortable,” he urged, gesturing toward the leather sofa in his living room.
Relieved, Dan sat down beside his brother. “This is quite a welcome,” he told Jamie, then confessed the fear that had almost made him turn around and go home before Jamie even knew he was there. “I was afraid you’d be angry with me.”
“You mean for leaving?”
Dan nodded, looking uncomfortable as well as embarrassed. “Yes.”
“I was,” Jamie admitted. “I was really angry for a while. Angry and bitter that you and Luke and Bailey had just picked up and left us. Left me,” he emphasized because that was what had been at the heart of his initial anger. “But then I realized that it wasn’t your fault. After Mom and Dad died in that car crash, Grandma and Grandpa didn’t exactly make it easy for the three of you to stick around.”
As his brother spoke, memories of his grandparents assailed Daniel. Reliving those harsh days, even now, was painful. But he needn’t explain them to Jamie, he realized, when his brother continued.
“I didn’t find out the truth till much later. That they’d made it quite clear that they might have to take in Bella and me—since they managed to get the other girls adopted—but the three of you who were eighteen or older could fend for yourselves somewhere else. They all but told you, Luke and Bailey to leave town, so you really had no choice but to go.”
Daniel could remember the day so clearly, though it had happened twelve years ago.
“But I didn’t know at the time that they had said that to you,” Jamie said. “All I knew was that my parents were dead and my big brothers had abandoned me just when I felt that I needed them the most.” Jamie shook his head, trying to block the painful feeling those memories aroused. “I was really angry at you for a long time.”
Dan made no effort to attempt to deflect the blame. However, the way Jamie had welcomed him was not the greeting of a man who still held a grudge.
“But you’re not anymore?” Dan asked, wanting to be perfectly clear just where they stood in relation to one another.
“No, I’m not,” Jamie readily confirmed.
Relief swamped him. Dan knew he should just accept that and be happy. He was aware that he was pushing his luck, but he had to know. “What changed your mind?”
Jamie laughed. “Simple. I found out that life’s too short to carry around all this anger and bitterness. And the triplets came into my life. Nothing like being responsible for three tiny, helpless souls to make you get over yourself—fast,” Jamie emphasized. “Once I stopped being so angry about everything, I left myself open for the good stuff, like love,” he told Dan with a wide grin. “And that’s when I fell in love with Fallon O’Reilly. After that, my whole world changed for the better—and now I couldn’t be happier.”
As if suddenly hearing himself, Jamie stopped right in the middle of his narrative, embarrassed. “Hell, I’m sorry.”
“About what?” Dan asked, confused.
“Well, I’m doing all the talking here.”
Dan shook his head. “That’s okay. I think it’s great. I haven’t heard your voice in so long,” he told Jamie. “Just keep talking.”
But Jamie was not about to get sidetracked again. He had questions for his older brother.
“No, first tell me what made you suddenly turn up on my doorstep now, after twelve long years.” Fresh fears suddenly surfaced in his mind. “Did something happen?” he wanted to know. “Has something suddenly changed? You’re not dying, are you?” he asked, alarmed.
“No, I’m not dying,” Dan assured his brother. “What happened was that I was in my cabin—”
Jamie cut in, surprised. “You have a cabin?”
“Yes,” Dan answered. He didn’t want to get into all that right now. That was for later. “Long story,” he said, waving it away.
Jamie was starved for any and all information concerning Dan, not to mention the rest of his family, except for his sister Bella, who was still in Rust Creek Falls, and other sister Dana, who had recently been found.
“Go ahead, I’m all ears,” Jamie told him.
Dan wanted to tell him about this part first, because it was what led to his coming back to Rust Creek Falls and to his seeking out Jamie. “I’ll tell you about that once I finish answering your first question.”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Jamie said, then coaxed, “Go ahead, I’m listening.”
“All right, then.” Taking a breath, Dan began again. “I’d just put in an extra-hard day. Walking into my cabin, I turned on the TV for some company—”
“So you live alone?”
Alone.
Each time Dan heard it, the word burned more and more of a hole in his gut. “Yeah, I do.”
“You never married?” Jamie asked.
Dan shook his head. “Nope.”
How could he marry? His heart was not his to give to anyone. It was already spoken for—even if the woman who it belonged to had no use for it.
When he hesitated, Jamie apologized.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to pry,” he told Dan. “Go on. You walked in, turned on the TV for company and then what?”
When he heard Jamie summarize the events he’d just told him, the words had this incredibly lonely ring to them. He knew he’d felt the same thing time and again, but he’d talked himself into living with it. He’d made himself believe that his life wasn’t as soul-draining as it really was. But now he knew the truth. That he was exceedingly lonely—and that he had made the right decision in coming home.
At least for now.
“And then I heard this voice,” Dan said, continuing with his narrative, “this voice that was filled with pride and love, talking about his triplets.”
“Wait,” Jamie said, stopping his brother. “You heard me on TV? You caught that program that Travis Dalton taped in town? You actually saw The Great Roundup?”
Dan smiled at the eager disbelief he heard in his brother’s voice. “I did.”
“But that segment was on more than a month ago.”
Dan merely nodded and said, “I know.”
“You’ve been here in Rust Creek Falls all this time?”
“No, I just got here,” Dan corrected. He wanted his brother to understand that it had been his cold feet that had kept him from coming. “You’re my first stop. Possibly my only stop because I don’t know where everyone else is, or even if they’re still in Montana.”
But Jamie was still having a hard time making sense out of what he was hearing. The brother he remembered, the one he had idolized, had never been someone to drag his feet.
“I don’t understand. If the show was on over a month ago, what took you so long to get here?”
Dan wasn’t about to lie or make up excuses. “It took me a month to get up the nerve to come and see you. I wasn’t sure if you’d even let me come in your front door, or if you’d take one look at me, slam the door in my face and tell me to go to hell.”
Jamie stared at him, an incredulous smile widening on his lips.
“You were afraid I’d reject you?” he asked.
Dan nodded. “Something like that.”
The idea was so outlandish it almost made Jamie laugh out loud. “You were afraid of your little brother?” he asked, unable to believe that Danny could be afraid of anyone, least of all him.
Dan made no attempt at excuses, or to brazen the situation out. He was long past that sort of thing as far as he was concerned.
“Yes,” Dan admitted, “I was. Because, as far as you were concerned, Luke, Bailey and I had run out on you and the girls. Left you at the mercy of a couple of cranky grandparents, neither of whom was ever going to be up for grandparent of the year. Left you and never tried to get in contact with you,” Dan concluded with a sigh.
For a moment, the stark, honest answer left Jamie speechless. And then he said, “Well, at least you’re not trying to sugarcoat any of it, I’ll give you that.”
“I can’t sugarcoat it,” Dan admitted. “I want you to know that I wanted to see you and the girls, wanted to get in contact with you.” He put a hand on his brother’s shoulder, anchoring him with the sincere look in his eyes. “Not a day went by in those years when I didn’t think about you.”
Jamie believed him. But he still had questions. “So if you felt that way, why didn’t you get in contact with any of us?”
“I didn’t want to disrupt your lives any more than they’d already been disrupted,” Dan told him with sincerity.
“You wouldn’t have disrupted them, you idiot,” Jamie cried. “You would have only made them better.”
Dan sighed again. “Yeah, well...” His voice trailed off. At the time, he’d been convinced he was doing the right thing.
And then, of course, there had been the guilt. That had all but paralyzed him. It had definitely kept him from returning.
Jamie took pity on him. “Water under the bridge,” he told Dan. “Just water under the bridge. What really matters is that you’re here now,” he said, sounding genuinely happy. “Makes my suffering through the taping of that program worth all the agony,” he added with a warm laugh. “Oh damn, where are my manners? Can I offer you something to eat or drink?”
“No, I’m fine,” Dan told him. “Just seeing you again after all this time is all I need.”
“Speaking of need,” Jamie said, “I need you to fill me in.”
“On what?”
“On what you’ve been doing these last twelve years,” Jamie said.
Dan blew out a long breath. He knew he owed Jamie that much. Still, going over that ground would bring up memories he wanted left buried and undisturbed.
He looked at Jamie, wondering where to start. “That, my brother, is a tall order.”
Chapter Two (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
“Well,” Jamie said in response to the unreadable expression on his brother’s face, “think of it as the price you have to pay if you want to get to meet your nephews and niece.”
The triplets, Dan thought. He’d almost forgotten about them.
“Okay,” he replied gamely, “if you’re really serious.”
Jamie managed to keep a straight face for approximately fifteen seconds, and then he finally broke down and laughed.
“I’m just curious about what you’ve been doing, but if you don’t want to talk about it,” he said more soberly, “that’s okay.”
Dan appreciated that his brother wasn’t pressuring him for information. The very fact that Jamie wasn’t encouraged him to share.
“It’s not that I don’t want to talk about it, Jamie. I just don’t want to put you to sleep.” The smile on his face was a tad sheepish. “The last twelve years have been pretty boring.”
The sadness Jamie saw in his brother’s eyes told him that those years weren’t boring so much as they might have left a scar on Dan’s soul. Jamie found himself aching for his brother.
“Tell me when you’re ready,” Jamie said. “No pressure.”
Dan was about to say something in response, but just then, a slender, willowy redhead with lively blue eyes and an infectious smile walked into the room, coming from the back of the house. She looked straight at him.
“I thought I heard you talking to someone,” she said to Jamie.
Both Jamie and his brother rose to their feet in unison.
“Danny,” Jamie said, putting his hand out to the woman who had just crossed over to them, “I’d like you to meet the light of my life, my wife, Fallon.” Affectionately wrapping his arm around her waist, Jamie continued the introduction. “Fallon, this is my older brother Danny.”
Jamie expected a nod of acknowledgment from the pretty young woman. A smile at best. But he quickly discovered that Fallon was just like her husband. Rather than greeting him with a few pleasantries, she left the shelter of her husband’s arm and went straight to him.
The young woman embraced him, giving him a warm hug that swirled straight into his heart.
“Danny! It’s so wonderful to finally meet you,” she cried enthusiastically. “Jamie’s told me so much about you!”
Stunned, still caught up in Fallon’s embrace, Dan looked over her shoulder at his brother. He’d thought that by now, Jamie would have thought of him as a distant memory—if that.
“Really?” he asked.
“Yes,” Fallon replied. Releasing her brother-in-law, she stepped back next to her husband. “Can’t get to know the man without getting to know his family. Though I must admit it took a bit of work at first. Jamie wasn’t much of a talker in the beginning,” she confided. “I think he kind of felt overwhelmed, and under the circumstances, who could blame him?” she said, looking at Jamie fondly. “But once I got him going, he told me all about you and Luke and Bailey, as well as your sisters. Bella and Dana, of course, I got to know myself. You’ve all had a rough life,” she readily acknowledged, “but it can only get better from here on in.”
Before Dan could ask about either Bella or Dana, Jamie told him, “Bella’s still in Rust Creek Falls. She’s married now. And Dana came for a while late last year. Turns out she’s living in Portland, Oregon with a nice family who had adopted her. No word on Liza yet, but we’re still looking.” He smiled broadly at Danny. “Bella and Dana will both be thrilled to know that you’re actually alive.”
The revelation stunned Dan. He stared at his brother. “You didn’t think I was alive?” he asked Jamie incredulously.
“Well, I didn’t hear from you for twelve years. The thought had crossed my mind,” Jamie said. “Anyway, it was Fallon who encouraged me to start looking, not just for you but for all the lost sheep of our family,” he said. He paused to press a kiss to his wife’s temple. “I don’t mind telling you that this woman saved my life.”
Fallon put her hand on her husband’s chest. “Now, don’t get all melodramatic on your brother, Jamie,” Fallon chided.
“No melodrama,” Jamie responded. “Just the plain truth. I was in a really bad way after Paula died,” he told Dan.
“Paula?” Dan asked. It occurred to him that he knew next to nothing about what Jamie had gone through in the last twelve years, just what he had gotten from the TV program.
A pang twisted his gut. He should have been here. Somehow, even though his grandparents had all but thrown him and his older brothers out, he should have found a way to be there for Jamie and his sisters. A way to get over his all-but-soul-crushing guilt, a way to keep them all together as a family.
“His first wife,” Fallon interjected.
The fact that Jamie had been married to someone else first didn’t seem to bother her, Dan observed. She seemed to take it all in stride. Jamie had really lucked out with Fallon, Dan thought. He was genuinely happy for his brother. At least one of them had found happiness, despite the fact that the odds had felt as if they were against all of them.
“The triplets were born prematurely,” Jamie explained, continuing to fill his brother in. “Paula died shortly after that from complications caused by the C-section. For a long while, I felt it was all my fault.”
Confused, Dan wondered how that could possibly be his brother’s fault.
“Paula didn’t want kids. I did.” A semi-sad smile played on his lips. “I guess I missed the sounds of a big family.”
Fallon took over her husband’s narrative. It was clear that she didn’t want him to dwell on what she felt were his unfounded feelings of guilt.
“The whole town pitched in to help Jamie out when Paula passed on. A bunch of us took turns volunteering to take care of the triplets so that he could regain his foothold.”
“I wouldn’t have made it without you,” Jamie told her.
“Without us,” Fallon corrected. “Like I said,” she told Dan, “the whole town pitched in.”
Deftly, Fallon changed the subject, asking Dan, “So, have you come back to Rust Creek Falls to stay?”
“Not to sound as pushy as this redhead,” Jamie interjected, “but have you?”
Dan was still trying to make his mind up about that. “I’m not sure yet.”
Fallon didn’t hesitate. “Well, you’re staying with us while Jamie helps you to make up your mind,” she told Dan. Her tone, warm and friendly, left no room for argument.
Still, Dan felt he had to at least offer a protest. “I can’t impose.”
“Family never imposes,” Jamie insisted. “End of discussion. You’re staying,” he said with finality. Then he got back to his initial question. “So where have you been all this time?”
That was simple enough to answer. “The last ten years I’ve been in Colorado.”
“Colorado?” Jamie repeated. “I can’t picture you in Colorado.”
Dan understood where Jamie was coming from on that. Colorado brought up images of big cities and he was a country boy at heart.
“I’ve been booking dude ranch vacations for city dwellers who fancy themselves cowboys,” Dan told his brother and Fallon. “It’s not a bad living,” he was quick to add. “And I get to spend most of my time on horseback.”
“Now, that I can picture,” Jamie told him. “You said you’ve been in Colorado for the last ten years, but you’ve been gone from Rust Creek Falls for twelve. Where did you go before then?”
“Cheyenne,” Dan answered. “I worked as a ranch hand there—along with Luke and Bailey. But they didn’t much care for it,” he confessed with a sad smile. “They got restless and then, one night, they just took off.” He paused, trying to deal with an unexpected wave of sadness that washed over him. Suppressing a sigh, he told Jamie, “I haven’t seen them since.”
Fallon leaned forward and put her hand up on her brother-in-law’s shoulder. “We’ll find them,” she promised.
“Isn’t she amazing?” Jamie asked him. There was pride in his eyes. “She just keeps spreading optimism wherever she goes, no matter what.”
A light pink hue rose to Fallon’s cheeks as she pointedly ignored her husband’s compliment. Rerouting the conversation again, she asked Dan, “Would you like to meet our kids?”
He could think of nothing that he would like better. “I’d love to,” Dan responded.
“Then come this way. You can come too, Jamie,” she added playfully, as if it was an afterthought. “Now, brace yourself,” she told Dan. “These are not your typical year-and-a-half-old babies. They could use Jared, Henry and Kate in caffeine commercials,” she confided.
“By the way, Kate’s the one with a bow on her head,” Jamie told him as they walked to the bedroom that the triplets occupied when they were downstairs.
He explained that the official nursery was upstairs, but because they wanted the triplets near them as much as possible, they’d created a second room for the babies downstairs where they could take their naps.
“She had such short hair,” Jamie explained, “everyone thought I had three sons. After a while, I got tired of telling them that Kate was a girl, so I put a bow on her to set them straight.”
“Now her hair is finally growing in,” Fallon told him as she led the way into the back room. “Which is a good thing, because she keeps pulling that bow off.”
Dan couldn’t hold back the smile when he stepped into the room and saw the triplets. The two boys were both on their feet, their chubby little fingers grabbing the side of their playpen and shaking it. Dan had a feeling that the playpen’s life expectancy was in serious jeopardy of being severely shortened.
The third triplet was seated on her well-padded bottom, serenely playing with a floppy-eared stuffed bunny, seemingly totally oblivious to the commotion her brothers were creating.
Beaming with unabashed pride, Jamie introduced his triplets.
“Dan, I’d like you to meet Henry and Jared,” he said, indicating the two standing boys. “And this little sweetheart is Kate. Kids,” Jamie said to his triplets, “this is your uncle Danny. Can you say ‘Hi’ to him?” he prompted.
An uneven chorus of something that could be thought to pass for “Hi!” rose up following Jamie’s request.
“They talk?” Dan asked, his voice a mixture of surprise and envy. He knew next to nothing when it came to children and even less than that when it came to babies.
“Talk?” Jamie echoed, then said with a laugh, “They don’t stop talking. Not even in their sleep. Of course, most of the time it sounds like gibberish and I can’t understand what they’re saying, but they seem to be able to communicate with each other just fine.”
“That’s because twins and triplets have a language all their own,” Fallon told her husband.
Dan dropped to his knees beside the playpen to get closer to the three little people who had been instrumental in getting him to finally come home. Something stirred within him as he watched them for a moment.
“Hi, kids.”
Again he received an uneven chorus echoing the greeting. Kate pulled herself up to her feet and made her way over to him. She offered him a sunny smile and just like that, she took him prisoner.
Dan ran his hand along her silky hair. “She’s going to be a charmer,” he told Jamie.
“What do you mean ‘going to be’?” Jamie asked. “She already is one.”
“You’re right,” Dan laughed, unable to take his eyes off the little girl. “My mistake.”
* * *
Dan spent the next hour getting to know his brother’s children as well as his brother’s wife. It was the best hour he could remember spending in the last twelve years.
But then it was time to put the triplets down for a nap.
“I’m afraid you’re going to have to leave the room now,” Fallon told him, apologizing. “I’ll never get them down for their naps if you’re in eyesight.”
“I understand,” Dan said. He was already at the bedroom door, although he did pause for one last backward glance.
“They’re something else, aren’t they?” Jamie said with pride.
“They’re beautiful kids,” Dan agreed. And then he thought of the circumstances that Jamie had been forced to go through shortly after the triplets’ birth. “You must have had a really hard time coping right after Paula’s death,” Dan said with immense sympathy. Again, he fervently wished he could have been there for Jamie.
“It was hard,” Jamie admitted. “But Fallon wasn’t kidding. It felt like the whole town pitched in to help. Otherwise, quite honestly, I don’t know what would have happened or what I would have done. When you have just two hands and three kids, the numbers aren’t exactly in your favor,” he told his brother, his words underscored with a good-natured laugh.
Dan had been under the impression that Fallon had really meant a few people at best. But there was no reason for Jamie to exaggerate. That hadn’t been in the nature of the boy he’d known.
“The whole town?” Dan asked in amazement, just to be sure.
“Yeah, the whole town.” Jamie paused for a moment before adding, “Anne helped, too.”
The mere mention of her name was like a fissure in the dam. The crack split open, spewing forth a deluge of memories upon Daniel.
“Have you been by to see Anne since you got back?” Jamie asked, breaking into his thoughts.
Not a day had gone by in the last twelve years that Dan hadn’t wanted to see Anne Lattimore. That he hadn’t wanted to pack up his meager belongings and find Annie. But he had staunchly never given in to that desire.
Mainly because he was convinced that she was far better off without him.
And even now, as he stood in his brother’s house, battling the urge to ride up and see the woman he had loved practically from the first moment he’d drawn breath, a part of him still felt that she would be better off if he just left well enough alone.
“No,” Dan answered quietly, “I haven’t. When I came into town, I didn’t stop anywhere else. I came straight to your place.”
“I appreciate that, I really do,” Jamie told him. “But if you ask me, I think that you really should go see her.”
Jamie was tempted to say more, but he stopped himself. He pressed his lips together, as if physically blocking the words that had risen to his tongue.
“Maybe later,” Dan demurred.
“There’s already been too much ‘later,’ Danny. Twelve years of ‘later.’ You need to go see her. Now. Before any more time is lost. You can’t get that time back. And the more you drag your feet, the more time you lose,” Jamie insisted.
“When did you get this philosophical bent?” Dan asked, amused.
“Right about the time that I realized that I’d been in love with Fallon for a long time and needed to make her aware of it. Now, no more talk. It’s still early. Go!” He opened the front door and all but pushed his brother out. “And when you’ve seen Anne and talked to her,” he told Dan, “you can come back here—to your home.”
Chapter Three (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
She missed him.
After all this time, she still missed him. Not every minute of every day the way she once had. Sometimes, Anne Lattimore could go a whole week without feeling that awful, painful hollowness boring a gaping hole into the pit of her stomach and working its way out to her soul. And then, suddenly, without giving her any warning, the feeling would be back, descending on her with its full weight, making her ache.
Making her remember.
And then she would have to struggle to fight her way back out of the oppressive pit. Back into the light of day. Back into her life as a single mother and a full-time receptionist at Dr. Brooks Smith’s Veterinary Clinic.
Heaven knew there was enough in her life to keep her busy and most of the time, she was. Very busy. It was only during those evenings when Hank, her ex, would pick up Janie to have her stay overnight with him and the house was extra quiet that her mind would unearth images of Danny Stockton. That was when she would feel tormented.
Tormented, because even now she couldn’t make peace with the fact that he had left town without saying anything.
Left her without saying anything.
After everything they had meant to one another...
No, Anne upbraided herself, she had only thought that they had meant so much to one another. Obviously, she hadn’t meant to Danny nearly as much as he had meant to her.
She knew all the facts by now, having ferreted them out over the years. She knew that Danny’s grandparents had refused to be responsible for him and his older brothers. Knew that they had all but told him and his brothers to leave. But if she had meant something to him, if Danny had loved her the way she loved him, he would have found a way to stay.
And if he couldn’t abide staying in Rust Creek Falls, if he wanted to go somewhere else, she would have gone anywhere in the world with him. All he would have had to do was say that he wanted her to come with him and she would have left in a heartbeat. Left town, left her family, left her dreams of going to college. Left it all for Danny.
All he would have had to do was ask.
But he didn’t ask.
Instead, he just disappeared without a trace, like some magician’s big trick.
Even so, her pride badly wounded, she’d still tried to find him. But no one knew where Danny and his two brothers had gone. It was like they had vanished into thin air. Eventually, she gave up trying to find him, decided to go on with her life and went off to college.
And then Hank Harlow had happened in her life. It wasn’t long after they met that Hank, clearly smitten, asked her to marry him. Ten years her senior, Hank wouldn’t allow the age difference to get in the way. He told her that all he wanted to do was to make her happy.
Anne turned him down as gently as possible.
But Hank wouldn’t be deterred. He kept after her, always the well-mannered gentleman, but at the same time, completely determined.
Eventually, he wore her down.
Or more to the point, Anne’s circumstances had worn her down. She found out that she was pregnant.
Alarmed and yet thrilled about the baby, she tried to find Dan again. She wasn’t any more successful this time around than she had been with her first attempt.
Growing progressively more afraid and feeling completely alone, despite the fact that she did have family back in Rust Creek Falls, she’d accepted Hank’s proposal.
But she couldn’t marry him until she had told him everything. Summoning all her courage, she’d confessed to Hank that she thought he was a very good man, but that she couldn’t love him the way that he loved her. She’d also told him that she was pregnant.
Hank had listened to her very quietly. When she was finished, he told Anne that none of it made any difference to him. He’d still wanted to marry her. Very much.
Moreover, because it was important to her, he’d wanted her to finish college and get her degree. He’d told her that he was financially comfortable, which meant they could hire someone to look after the baby once he or she was born and she could attend her classes.
They were married shortly after that and Hank was true to his word, hiring a nanny when Janie was born. He wouldn’t let anything interfere with Anne finishing college. When she graduated, they came back to Rust Creek Falls. Hank bought a ranch and she found a job as a receptionist at the vet clinic.
For five years, everything seemed to be going well. Hank was good to her and he doted on Janie. He was definitely a good husband and a wonderful father, no one could dispute that, least of all her.
But eventually, Hank came to terms that he was never going to win her over, never get her to love him the way that he had hoped. Because she was in love and would always be in love with Daniel Stockton.
Their divorce was amicable and while Hank agreed to give her custody of Janie, he reserved the right to see the little girl and to have her over at his ranch whenever he wanted.
His only stipulation for the divorce was that their secret would remain a secret. As far as Janie and everyone else in Rust Creek Falls knew, he was Janie’s father. Anne agreed and Hank continued to cherish the role of father.
As for the divorce, though it was sudden, no one really questioned it. Their friends and family all just assumed that she had been too young to get married and that, most important of all, she had married Hank while still on the rebound from Danny.
Anne never told anyone otherwise, thinking it was best for Janie if everyone just went on believing that. That way, they wouldn’t go digging any further.
And her secret would remain just that, a secret. There was no reason for it to be otherwise.
Anne sighed as she pushed the memories aside. Instead, she rummaged through her pantry for dinner ingredients, not really sure what it was that she was looking for.
“What’s the matter, Mom?” Janie asked.
Anne blinked, realizing that she’d allowed herself to really drift off. She hadn’t even heard her daughter come into the kitchen. Facing her now, she quickly offered Janie a smile.
“What makes you ask that? There’s nothing the matter, honey,” she told her daughter a bit too quickly.
“Yes, there is,” Janie insisted. “You’ve got that funny look on your face, that look you get when something’s wrong.”
At eleven, Janie looked younger because of her size. She was a shade under four foot ten and weighed seventy-five pounds, making the blue-eyed blonde smaller than average. Despite that, Janie acted older. Sometimes, Anne had the feeling that her daughter was the adult and she was still that young girl who had fallen head over heels for Danny Stockton.
But this was not the time to indulge herself or wallow in old memories that belonged locked away in the past.
She knew that Janie was waiting for her to say something. She said the first thing that came to her mind. “I’m just trying to figure out what to make for dinner,” she told her daughter. It wasn’t exactly the most creative excuse, but for now, it was all she had. “Any suggestions?”
“How about hamburgers?” Janie asked brightly.
Anne shook her head. “Hamburgers are for when I don’t really have time to make dinner. The whole point of my coming home early is that I could make you something special.”
Far more intuitive than most girls her age, Janie was immediately alert. She looked at her mother suspiciously. “Are you going away, Mom?”
Caught completely off guard, her daughter’s question surprised her. Why would Janie think something like that? “No—”
“Am I going away?” Janie wanted to know.
Not for the first time, she couldn’t help thinking that her daughter was exceptionally bright. Janie could always pick up on her moods and seemed to instinctively know if something was bothering her—sometimes even before she knew it.
“No, of course not,” Anne denied, making certain that she sounded calm. “Can’t a mom come home early and make something special for her best daughter?”
Janie gave her a look as she said, “I’m your only daughter.”
“There’s that, too,” Anne said with a fond laugh as she gave her daughter a one-armed hug. “My best and only daughter.”
“I like hamburgers, Mom,” Janie reminded her pointedly.
Anne surrendered, secretly relieved that she was getting out of this so easily. Janie would normally grill her a lot longer.
“Okay, hamburgers it is,” she told her daughter. “But later on, when you’re staring down at your plate and you decide that you would have wanted to have something a little fancier, just remember, the hamburgers were your idea.”
“I’ll remember,” Janie promised.
Anne opened the refrigerator to make sure she had the necessary main ingredient for this particular “feast.” She did.
“Okay,” she said to Janie, closing the refrigerator door again. “Now go do your homework.”
“I can do it after dinner,” Janie protested, suddenly acting her age again.
“Yes, I know. I also know it’s better to get your homework out of the way first so that you don’t have it hanging over your head all evening. Remember, your father’s coming to pick you up for a sleepover tonight.”
Janie sighed dramatically, accepting defeat. “Okay, okay, if you don’t want my bright, shining face looking up at you adoringly while you cook, I will go and do my homework.”
Eleven, going on thirty, Anne thought with a smile. “Thank you,” she said. “I’ll see your bright, shining face looking at me from across the dining room table at dinner—after you finish your homework.”
Janie walked away, shaking her head. “You know, you should have been a teacher, not a receptionist,” the little girl complained.
“Oh no,” Anne answered, pretending to shudder at the very thought of being a teacher. “Corralling one student is all I can handle. I’d never survive a whole classroom full of them,” Anne assured her daughter. “Now go, make me proud.”
A giant, deep-down-from-her-toes sigh was her daughter’s only response.
Anne’s laugh was followed by a soft sigh as another memory corkscrewed through her. Janie was just like Danny had been at that age. Bright, sunny, eager to twist things until he got his way. And he always managed to do it without annoying anyone.
Sometimes, when she looked at Janie, she could really see Danny. See his face, see his mannerisms.
Anne could feel a tightening in the pit of her stomach again.
She supposed that was what had gotten her started today. Remembering what it had been like when she and Danny had been together.
Well, you just stop it right now! she ordered herself fiercely. She didn’t have time for this. There was no point in thinking about someone who hadn’t been in her life for twelve years.
Anne glanced at her watch. It was still early. Dinner was not for another hour and a half. Since Janie wanted hamburgers, dinner would take no more than fifteen minutes to prepare. That left her with enough time to do something she could actually regard as being fun.
That didn’t happen very often.
So infrequently, as a matter of fact, that she couldn’t think of anything right off the bat.
Stumped, she was tempted to call her daughter back into the room. They could watch a program together, one of those cartoons that Janie used to love so much when she was a little girl. Granted Janie was almost an adult—or so her daughter liked to think—but Anne knew that Janie secretly still loved watching animated films, especially the ones that were well made and had heart.
Heaven only knew how much longer that would last, Anne mused, going into the family room and looking at the television guide. It wouldn’t be all that long before Janie would feel obligated to turn her back on everything and anything that was connected to the little girl she had once been.
It was a rite of passage, Anne thought sadly.
She was just about to turn on the TV and call her daughter into the family room when she heard the doorbell.
Someone was at her door.
Anne looked at her watch. Ordinarily, she would be still at the animal clinic at this time. Her friends all knew that, which meant that this wasn’t a social call. And it was way too early for Hank.
Maybe one of her neighbors had seen that her car was in the driveway and was bringing over their beloved dog or cat for some free medical advice. For some reason, some of her neighbors thought that just because she worked at the vet clinic, she knew everything that the vets did.
Only one way to find out who was at her door, she thought with a resigned sigh.
She went to the door, preparing to dispatch the neighbor and their pet as quickly as possible.
Opening the door, Anne said, “What seems to be the problem?” before she actually looked at the person who was standing on her doorstep.
The word problem came out as more of a squeak than an actual word.
Her heart was suddenly pounding in her ears. Anne blinked, just in case she actually was seeing things.
The person on her doorstep didn’t vanish, didn’t change.
She had imagined this very scene so many times in the last dozen years, she couldn’t even begin to count them. Now that it actually seemed to be taking place, she felt as if her entire body had been dipped in glue, then held fast against some invisible canvas. She was unable to move.
Unable to even breathe.
All she could do was stare at him in complete disbelief.
Slowly, she fought back from the emotional paralysis that held her in its grip, struggling to say something, a sentence, a word.
A sound.
“Hello, Anne.”
His deep voice rumbled, the sound echoing within her very chest, interfering with the beat of her heart, or what might have passed for a beat right now if it wasn’t as paralyzed as the rest of her.
Finally, with the inside of her mouth drier than the desert and swiftly turning into sand, Anne forced herself to say something.
Or rather, to say a word. A name.
His name.
“Danny?” she asked hoarsely, her throat all but closing up.
She saw a smile, that same faint, funny little smile she had loved so well, curve his lips just before he confirmed what she was asking.
“Yes, Anne, it’s me.”
The moment he said that, she felt them. Felt the tears that she had been harboring within her for the last twelve years, tears she’d forbade herself to ever shed, even once. She had been able to maintain almost superhuman control over herself, afraid that if she ever allowed herself to cry, to shed so much as a single tear, then there would be no way to stop the flow.
Twelve years’ worth of tears.
Anne bit her lower lip, desperately trying to prevent them from falling. Struggling to keep from losing the battle she felt she was doomed to lose.
And then she heard him hesitantly say her name again, the name he used to call her, when the world was so full of possibilities and their love was brand-new.
“Annie?”
Chapter Four (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
In the minutes before he’d knocked on Jamie’s door, anticipating the end of a twelve-year separation, Dan had experienced a strong bout of nerves. But he realized now that that had been a piece of cake in comparison to what he’d went through just before he finally rang Annie’s doorbell.
For one thing, he hadn’t been sure who would be on the other side of that door, Annie or her husband.
Jamie hadn’t told him about Annie’s marriage when he’d urged him to go see her, but he’d known about Annie’s marriage to Hank for a long time now.
He wasn’t quite as technologically backward as everyone obviously seemed to think. During one of his bouts of homesickness, he had availed himself of the computer in the ranch town’s library and poked around on social media, searching for information about someone he knew.
About Anne.
He himself wasn’t on any websites, but that didn’t keep him from looking for information about Anne.
And he’d found it.
He found several photos of Annie, her husband and her little girl posted. He remembered the first time he saw the photo of Annie and Hank. It felt as if someone had taken a jagged knife to his chest and savagely carved out his heart. It was also the last time he looked at that site. It hurt too much.
But then he told himself that he had no right to feel that way. He’d left her life; there was no reason to believe she would spend her days pining away for him. He’d left town—and Annie—because he felt he was unworthy of her, felt that he didn’t deserve someone as good and pure as her.
That meant that she was free to go on with her life, to marry anyone she chose.
And he was happy for her, happy that she had found someone to love, someone to take care of her. Someone who had obviously started a family with her. He had no right to feel as wounded as he did.
Nonetheless, wounded was how he felt.
And after all these years, there was no denying that he still loved her.
Dan had thought twice about just turning up on her doorstep.
And then he’d thought some more.
However, his need to see Annie again, to just look at her outweighed his fear that she would see right through him and guess how he still felt about her.
But that was his problem, not Annie’s, and for her sake, he intended to keep his guard up and maintain a tight rein on all those feelings. Above all, he didn’t want to risk making her feel uncomfortable in his presence, not for anything in the world.
Annie stared at the man on her doorstep. A thousand questions instantly sprang up in her head, crowding out one another. A thousand questions that she wanted to put to him. But giving voice to any of them would only tear at the scabs that covered wounds which had taken so very long to heal.
And then there was the little girl who was only two rooms away.
Danny’s little girl.
It was one thing when she couldn’t find Danny to tell him that he was a father, but it was entirely another thing when all that separated Danny from finding out that he was a father was her sudden, very strong onslaught of cold feet.
It went beyond cold feet. Telling him wouldn’t just upend Danny’s world. Finding out that Danny was Janie’s father instead of Hank would cause total chaos in her world, as well.
And then there was Hank to think of.
He’d been good to her. Good when he didn’t have to be. She couldn’t allow him to be on the receiving end of such a blow. For all intents and purposes, Hank had been Janie’s father from the moment the little girl had been born. She hadn’t forced the role on Hank; he’d taken it on gladly.
Hank loved their daughter and Janie was their daughter. He had raised Janie with her for five years. And then, even after they had gotten a divorce, he hadn’t divorced himself from Janie, hadn’t taken himself out of her life. He considered himself to be Janie’s father even after Anne had told Hank who Janie’s real father was. She couldn’t just pull the rug out from under him now, not without giving him fair warning.
A lot of fair warning.
And yet, here he was, Danny Stockton, like some ghost out of the past, standing on her doorstep. If Janie came into the room, all he would need was to take one look at the little girl and he’d know she was his.
She could feel her stomach tying itself up into a knot.
“What are you doing here?” Anne heard herself finally asking, feeling as if she was trapped in some sort of a surreal dream.
All this time and she hadn’t changed a bit, Dan thought, trying not to stare at her. If anything, Annie was even more beautiful than he remembered.
“I was in the neighborhood and thought I’d drop by,” Danny answered glibly. “No?” he asked, seeing the look on her face. He shrugged, feeling awkward, something he’d never felt around her before. “Well, it was worth a shot. The truth is, I saw a clip on TV a month ago. Jamie and his triplets were in it. After the program was over, I couldn’t stop seeing their faces. I knew I had to come back to Rust Creek Falls to see them.”
You had to come back to see them. But not me. “Oh, I see,” Anne murmured, her voice stilted.
“And you,” Dan added awkwardly, realizing his oversight. “I wanted to see you.” He blew out a ragged breath and then asked, “Can I come in?”
For a moment, it looked as if she was going to say no. But then she stepped back and gestured for him to enter the house.
“Mom?” Janie called out. She ventured into the living room and looked uncertainly at the stranger talking to her mother.
For the second time in as many minutes, Anne felt her heart lodge itself in her throat as she all but stopped breathing.
Could Danny see it? Could he see that Janie was his daughter?
She slanted a hesitant look in his direction. Danny was smiling broadly at the little girl.
“Hi. You must be Janie,” he said. There was clearly awe in his eyes.
The picture of confidence and self-assurance, Janie raised her chin. “I am. Who are you?” she wanted to know.
“Janie,” Anne chided her daughter for responding so bluntly.
“No, that’s okay,” Danny was quick to tell her. “She’s being direct. That’s a very positive quality to have.” He turned his attention to the little girl. “I’m Daniel Stockton,” he told her. “I used to live in Rust Creek Falls.”
“And you were friends with my mom?” Janie asked, curious.
Anne felt a sharp pang in her heart, afraid of saying anything. Afraid of giving herself away.
He looked at Anne for a moment before he answered. “Yes,” he replied quietly. “I was friends with your mom.”
“And my dad?” Janie wanted to know, probing further.
“No,” Dan answered truthfully. “I’m afraid that I never met your dad.”
Growing progressively more apprehensive, Anne didn’t want this exchange to go any further. Not until she set a few ground rules to make sure that nothing was exposed ahead of time.
Until then, she needed to keep Janie and Danny away from one another.
“Did you finish your homework, young lady?” she asked her daughter.
“No, not yet,” Janie began. “But—”
Anne cut her off. “Then I suggest you go back and finish it. That’s what we agreed to, remember?” she reminded her daughter.
Janie made a face. “I don’t remember agreeing,” she protested. “You just told me to do it.”
“Same thing, puddin’,” Anne told her daughter affectionately. “Now go,” she said, pointing toward the rear of the house where Janie’s room was located, “and don’t come back until you’ve finished doing it.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Janie sighed with a pout. Turning, she dragged her feet as she went to her room.
“She looks like you.”
So worried that he’d see himself in their daughter, Anne didn’t hear him at first. And then his words replayed themselves in her head. She turned around to face Danny, a little stunned.
“What?”
“I said she looks like you.” There was no missing the fondness in his voice. Or the wistfulness. “A miniature carbon copy of what you looked like at that age. She’s what, about nine, right?”
Nine would make her safe, Anne thought. If Danny thought that Janie was nine, then he’d definitely believe that the little girl was Hank’s daughter and that would be that. Fear of discovery would be taken off the table once and for all.
But saying yes would be lying, Anne thought and somehow, she just couldn’t bring herself to lie to Danny after all these years.
The word stuck in her throat like a fishbone that had been accidentally swallowed.
Rather than say yes or no, Anne focused on something else he had just said. “You really think she looks like me?”
“Absolutely,” he assured her. “Right down to her stubborn streak.”
“What does a stubborn streak look like?” Anne asked wryly.
Dan smiled at her, fighting a very strong desire to touch her. Not in the intimate way he used to—after all, she was another man’s wife now—but just to put his hand on her shoulder, to connect with her for the smallest of moments.
“I’m looking at it right now,” he told Annie. And then his smile faded as he grew serious. “When you opened the door just now, you asked me what I was doing here.”
Anne inclined her head, slightly embarrassed. “Not exactly the politest way to greet someone after twelve years,” she admitted, then went on to say, “but in my defense, you did catch me by surprise.”
Lord, but she looked good, he couldn’t help thinking, all but devouring her with his eyes. “You know, I didn’t exactly tell you the truth when I said I was in the neighborhood.”
“I had my suspicions,” she replied with a soft laugh. Rust Creek Falls was in no one’s neighborhood. “So why are you here?” she asked.
Dan cleared his voice before saying, “I came to apologize for leaving you the way I did.”
Stunned by his admission, Anne looked at the man she had once thought of as the love of her life. It took her more than a moment to find her tongue.
“You know, over the last dozen years, I must have imagined this scene a hundred different ways. The only thing all those scenes had in common, besides your apology, was that I always felt relieved when I heard you apologize. I felt somehow vindicated.
“But I’m not vindicated, not relieved,” she told him with feeling. “I’m just...sad, I guess. Sad about all the years in between that were lost. Why did you leave like that?”
Dan shook his head. That was something he didn’t want to get into. It was a secret he would most likely take to his grave rather than burden someone else with.
“I didn’t have a choice,” was all he allowed himself to say.
Anne frowned ever so slightly. That excuse just didn’t hold any water for her. “Everyone always has a choice,” she told him.
“I didn’t,” he replied.
There had to be more, something he wasn’t telling her. “But—”
Dan changed the subject. “I also wanted to tell you that I’m happy for you.”
For a moment, still trying to understand what Danny wasn’t telling her, she was caught off guard. His last words completely confused her.
“What did you say?”
“I said I’m happy for you,” Danny repeated. “Happy that you’ve moved on. That you found someone you cared about and got married. That you went on to have a beautiful daughter.”
She’s your beautiful daughter, she thought, an unexpected wave of anger filling her.
Anne continued staring at him. “You’re happy for me,” she repeated in disbelief, like someone who didn’t quite understand the gist of the words she was saying.
Dan nodded, forcing a smile to his lips. “Yes, I am.”
Did he even have a clue how much it stung to hear him say that to her? How much it actually physically tore her apart?
Why didn’t you come back to me? Why didn’t you show up on my doorstep years ago and tell me that you couldn’t bear to live without me? Why did you just vanish out of my life without a trace, leaving me to face being pregnant all by myself?
But she couldn’t say any of that, couldn’t risk him knowing the truth, at least not yet. Perhaps not ever. There were other people to consider.
So, instead, she asked, “Where were you all these years?”
Anne struggled to keep the accusation out of her voice, doing her best to sound like just an old friend trying to catch up with another old friend instead of a spurned lover who’d given her heart away and had it torn in two more than a decade ago.
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Marie Ferrarella
Congratulations…it's a girl! Talk about mending fences—have you heard that rugged rancher Daniel Stockton is back in town? It's been ten years since Dan left Rust Creek Falls with Anne Lattimore's heart in tow. She soon married someone else and had a child, but their marriage didn't last. We here at the Gazette think we know why. It has something to do with Anne's beautiful daughter, Janie…Now that Dan has returned, will Anne find the courage to forgive him—and tell him that sweet Janie is really his? Will Dan find the courage to ask for a second chance? Stay tuned, you hopeful romantics, to see if love really can conquer all!
Congratulations...it’s a girl!
RUST CREEK RAMBLINGS
Talk about mending fences—have you heard that rugged rancher Daniel Stockton is back in town? It’s been ten years since Dan left Rust Creek Falls with Anne Lattimore’s heart in tow. She soon married someone else and had a child, but their marriage didn’t last. We here at the Gazette think we know why. It has something to do with Anne’s beautiful daughter, Janie...
Now that Dan has returned, will Anne find the courage to forgive him—and tell him that sweet Janie is really his? Will Dan find the courage to ask for a second chance? Stay tuned, you hopeful romantics, to see if love really can conquer all!
“Looks like you’ve been cleared to go,” he told her as the other woman stepped away.
Anne felt butterflies fluttering in the pit of her stomach. Why did she feel as if she was about to go out on a first date? She wasn’t, for heaven’s sake. This wasn’t even a date at all. She was just getting a cup of coffee with someone who had once meant a great deal to her.
Someone you had a baby with, the voice in her head reminded her.
With effort, Anne forced a ghost of a smile to her lips as she said, “Just let me get my purse and then I’m ready.”
After taking out her purse from one of the bottom drawers, Anne rose to her feet. She glanced at the phone, willing it to ring.
It didn’t.
She had temporarily run out of possible excuses.
“Okay,” she told Danny as she came around to the front of the reception desk, “let’s get that cup of coffee.”
Taking her elbow to help guide her out of the clinic, Dan murmured, “I thought you’d never ask.”
The butterflies went into high gear.
* * *
Montana Mavericks: The Great Family Roundup—Real cowboys and real love in Rust Creek Falls!
The Maverick’s Return
Marie Ferrarella
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
USA TODAY bestselling and RITA® Award–winning author MARIE FERRARELLA has written more than two hundred and seventy-five books for Mills & Boon, some under the name Marie Nicole. Her romances are beloved by fans worldwide. Visit her website, www.marieferrarella.com (http://www.marieferrarella.com).
To
Marcia Book Adirim,
Whose multilevel mind
Always leaves me in complete
Awe
Contents
Cover (#u0dded4b7-887f-5c48-a274-230fd0209ff4)
Back Cover Text (#u53746a76-07f8-5240-ac15-34da996fa8a9)
Introduction (#u95cb778c-889c-5047-a0b7-bb4f61300b47)
Title Page (#ued7e7aac-bb7b-5175-bd73-b687ea4bc834)
About the Author (#u07fd8c07-7c05-557a-9f22-07b9d3bf4343)
Dedication (#u2ea4984a-7432-5bd2-aadb-e015ad00260f)
Prologue (#uf46728b3-dcf3-57d0-9b21-c604e22373e2)
Chapter One (#u5879398e-d597-58dd-a128-24a7b922faa0)
Chapter Two (#ua90e8eec-1c03-5f7d-a710-02b19e5172d8)
Chapter Three (#u1b1b9a5e-7877-536c-b8ae-9fea235d9bf9)
Chapter Four (#u757d0fca-41cb-5c27-846d-23861fff861a)
Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fifteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Sixteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seventeen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eighteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)
Extract (#litres_trial_promo)
Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
Prologue (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
Daniel Stockton wearily walked into the log cabin he lived in at the Comanchero Ranch. For the last ten years, he’d been in charge of booking vacations for city dwellers who yearned to sample the cowboy life for a week or two and pretend they lived back in the days of the old Wild West. The dude ranch, one of Colorado’s most popular, was currently in the height of its busy season. Attendance was at an all-time high and would probably remain so until somewhere around the end of next month.
As he concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other on the way to his secondhand sofa, Dan felt as if all those years had been packed into this last week and a half.
He sighed and collapsed on the worn, cracked sofa in the center of his small living area.
His stomach rumbled, asking to be appeased, but for now, Dan felt as if he couldn’t move more than the first two fingers of his right hand. The hand that was currently wrapped around the remote control for the TV that had been in the cabin when he’d initially moved in. The cabin was too quiet and he just wanted some background noise to distract him.
Even now, after all these years, he didn’t like being alone with his thoughts.
Aiming the remote at the twenty-four-inch TV screen, he pressed the power button, content to watch whatever program came on. He just wanted some company he didn’t have to explain anything to. The tourists who came to the ranch always seemed to be filled to the brim with questions.
Most of the time, that didn’t bother him, but there was this one family this last week that had a kid with them—Harlan—who just wouldn’t stop asking questions no matter what. The kid, all of eleven or twelve, was obviously trying to trip him up.
Dan felt as if his head was throbbing and, quite possibly, on the verge of exploding.
The pay at the Comanchero Ranch was fairly decent and he did get to spend most of his life on horseback, which he loved, but there were times—like this last week—when the loneliness caught up to him, wrapping its tentacles around him so hard he could scarcely breathe. That was when he found his patience to be thin and in relatively short supply. And when that happened, his tolerance went out the window.
This afternoon he’d come dangerously close to telling Harlan’s parents that they needed to take their son in hand and teach him some much-needed manners. But he’d managed to hold his tongue long enough to get those “dudes” back to the ranch house where they were staying.
However, it had been close. Closer than he really liked.
“Get a grip, Dan. This isn’t a bad job. And you sure as hell can’t afford to lose it,” he told himself as he got up again.
His stomach was growling way too much. It was time to rummage through his refrigerator and find something that could pass for food.
As he walked to the small refrigerator, his back was to the TV when he heard it.
The voice from his past.
Dan froze, listening. Convinced that he was imagining things.
It couldn’t be, he told himself. It was the loneliness getting to him, wearing away his edge, nothing more.
He forced himself to proceed to the kitchen and open the refrigerator. Instead of getting something to eat, he took out a bottle of root beer, twisted off the cap and closed the refrigerator door.
He’d just put the bottle to his lips when he heard it again.
The voice from his past.
“This is Travis Dalton and you’re watching The Great Roundup. We’re coming to you live from Rust Creek Falls, Montana, and I’m here talking to Jamie Stockton, the valiant dad of year-old triplets. Jamie, until just recently, had to juggle being both father and mother to these fine, hearty little human beings. Tell us how that felt, Jamie.”
“I don’t mind admitting that I was pretty overwhelmed at first,” the young man the narrator had addressed as Jamie answered.
The root beer slipped from Dan’s hand, meeting the floor at an obtuse angle. Mercifully, it avoided shattering. Instead, a small shower of foam emerged from the bottle, christening his boots and the bottom of his jeans.
Dan didn’t notice.
His eyes were glued to the TV, staring at the screen.
Staring at Jamie Stockton.
His younger brother.
The wave of loneliness Dan had been harboring turned into a twelve-foot sweeping tidal wave, all but drowning him in memories.
Memories he had been struggling so hard to bury and ignore for the last twelve years.
Listening to the voice of the young man telling his story caused those years to instantly melt away as if they had never happened.
Except that they had.
Chapter One (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
Daniel shifted from foot to foot, standing before the closed ranch house door.
His brother’s door.
He had absolutely no idea what to expect. What if, when his brother Jamie opened the door and saw who was knocking, he slammed it in his face?
Of course, there was a small chance, one that he was silently rooting for, that Jamie would mercifully allow him to plead his case.
The way he felt, however, the odds were probably against that happening.
It had taken Dan more than a whole month of intense soul searching to finally get up the nerve to take this giant step, to leave Colorado and travel all this distance back to Rust Creek Falls, Montana.
Back to his hometown and his roots.
Back to the place where it had all fallen apart twelve years ago.
Ironically, the very things that were drawing him back to Rust Creek Falls were the same things that had caused him to stay away so long in the first place.
The same things that made him hesitate reconnecting this last whole month.
Dan had raised his hand to knock on the door a total of three times now. And all three times his courage had failed him, causing him to drop his hand back down again to his side.
Come on. You didn’t come all this way back to Montana just to chicken out at the last minute. This isn’t you.
Except that, maybe, it was. Why else had he not tried to get back in contact with any of his siblings for over a decade?
The first two years of his self-imposed exile he’d been with his two older brothers, Luke and Bailey. But then they had gone their own separate ways, too, leaving him to fend for himself.
The simple truth of it was he was tired of being alone. Tired of having no one who shared at least part of the same memories from his childhood and adolescence.
Tired of not having any family.
It would have been different if he’d never had any siblings. He had very nearly made his peace with that. After all, he really had no idea where any of his brothers or sisters were anymore.
But then he’d heard Jamie’s voice on that broadcast last month and everything had changed.
Suddenly, he felt as if he was part of something again. He knew that at least Jamie was still back in Rust Creek Falls. All he had to do was reach out, reestablish that familial connection with his younger brother and just like that, he would have a family again.
It had sounded so easy when he had first thought of it. But now he wasn’t so sure.
At least find out if he’ll talk to you.
Taking a deep breath, Dan raised his hand again and this time, his knuckles finally made contact with the door, creating a rhythmic sound as he knocked.
He could feel his heart pounding as he stood there, waiting.
It was late afternoon, almost early evening. What if there was no one at home? What if Jamie and his triplets were away on vacation? After all, that could be a possibility, Dan thought.
Or what if Jamie was home, opened the door and then told him to go to hell?
Dan’s breath caught in his throat, all but turning solid.
What if—?
Suddenly, there was no more time for speculation or waffling. No more time for hypothetical what-ifs. The door opened and an older, adult version of the boy he had left behind twelve years ago, the young man he’d seen more than a month ago on his TV, was standing in the doorway, looking at him.
For a moment, the expression on Jamie Stockton’s face was blank. It was the kind of expression a person wore when they opened their door to someone they didn’t recognize.
But then, in the next moment, a multitude of emotions washed over Jamie’s face in quick succession, one after the other.
Like a man caught in a dream, Jamie stared at him. And then, finally, he asked hoarsely, “Daniel?”
Dan’s lips quirked in a quick, nervous smile. “Yeah. It’s me,” he confirmed, still feeling incredibly uneasy and uncertain about this reunion that he had instigated.
And then Dan cleared his throat and forced himself to push on and say something further. “I would have called ahead first, but I didn’t know how you would react to seeing me and I didn’t want to take a chance on you turning—”
Dan didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence. Whatever else he was going to say about his concerns regarding their first meeting in twelve years evaporated when Jamie pulled him into his arms and enfolded him in a giant bear hug.
“Oh my God, Danny. It really is you!” Jamie cried, holding on to him tightly, as if he was afraid that if he opened his arms, his older brother would suddenly just vanish.
When after a couple of minutes Jamie gave no sign of releasing him, Dan finally had to say, “Um, Jamie, I think you’re crushing my ribs.”
“Oh, right. Sorry.” Jamie let his arms drop. He took a step back and looked at Dan. Disbelief highlighted his face as his eyes raked over every square inch of his older brother. “It’s just that I never thought I’d see you again. Come in, come in,” he urged, gesturing into his house even as he ushered Dan in and closed the door behind him.
“Is everything okay? Are you here for a visit? Are you staying?” And then Jamie stopped asking questions. He took a deep breath, as if trying to get hold of himself. “Sorry, I don’t mean to overwhelm you. It’s just that there are so many things I want to know.”
Before Dan could say a single word in response, Jamie broke out in another huge smile. “Damn, but it’s good to see you!” he cried, pulling Dan into another heartfelt, although slightly less rib-crushing, bear hug.
This time, he released Dan without being prompted. A long sigh escaped him as he took a step back again.
“You’ve lost weight,” Jamie finally noted.
“I wasn’t exactly fat to begin with,” Dan reminded his brother with a self-conscious laugh.
“No, you weren’t. But I don’t recall your face looking this gaunt before—Damn, it’s so great to see you,” Jamie exclaimed again. “I thought... Well, for a while, I thought—” Jamie waved his hand. “Never mind what I thought. You’re alive and you’re here and that’s all that counts.” He blinked back tears that threatened to spill out. “Sit down. Make yourself comfortable,” he urged, gesturing toward the leather sofa in his living room.
Relieved, Dan sat down beside his brother. “This is quite a welcome,” he told Jamie, then confessed the fear that had almost made him turn around and go home before Jamie even knew he was there. “I was afraid you’d be angry with me.”
“You mean for leaving?”
Dan nodded, looking uncomfortable as well as embarrassed. “Yes.”
“I was,” Jamie admitted. “I was really angry for a while. Angry and bitter that you and Luke and Bailey had just picked up and left us. Left me,” he emphasized because that was what had been at the heart of his initial anger. “But then I realized that it wasn’t your fault. After Mom and Dad died in that car crash, Grandma and Grandpa didn’t exactly make it easy for the three of you to stick around.”
As his brother spoke, memories of his grandparents assailed Daniel. Reliving those harsh days, even now, was painful. But he needn’t explain them to Jamie, he realized, when his brother continued.
“I didn’t find out the truth till much later. That they’d made it quite clear that they might have to take in Bella and me—since they managed to get the other girls adopted—but the three of you who were eighteen or older could fend for yourselves somewhere else. They all but told you, Luke and Bailey to leave town, so you really had no choice but to go.”
Daniel could remember the day so clearly, though it had happened twelve years ago.
“But I didn’t know at the time that they had said that to you,” Jamie said. “All I knew was that my parents were dead and my big brothers had abandoned me just when I felt that I needed them the most.” Jamie shook his head, trying to block the painful feeling those memories aroused. “I was really angry at you for a long time.”
Dan made no effort to attempt to deflect the blame. However, the way Jamie had welcomed him was not the greeting of a man who still held a grudge.
“But you’re not anymore?” Dan asked, wanting to be perfectly clear just where they stood in relation to one another.
“No, I’m not,” Jamie readily confirmed.
Relief swamped him. Dan knew he should just accept that and be happy. He was aware that he was pushing his luck, but he had to know. “What changed your mind?”
Jamie laughed. “Simple. I found out that life’s too short to carry around all this anger and bitterness. And the triplets came into my life. Nothing like being responsible for three tiny, helpless souls to make you get over yourself—fast,” Jamie emphasized. “Once I stopped being so angry about everything, I left myself open for the good stuff, like love,” he told Dan with a wide grin. “And that’s when I fell in love with Fallon O’Reilly. After that, my whole world changed for the better—and now I couldn’t be happier.”
As if suddenly hearing himself, Jamie stopped right in the middle of his narrative, embarrassed. “Hell, I’m sorry.”
“About what?” Dan asked, confused.
“Well, I’m doing all the talking here.”
Dan shook his head. “That’s okay. I think it’s great. I haven’t heard your voice in so long,” he told Jamie. “Just keep talking.”
But Jamie was not about to get sidetracked again. He had questions for his older brother.
“No, first tell me what made you suddenly turn up on my doorstep now, after twelve long years.” Fresh fears suddenly surfaced in his mind. “Did something happen?” he wanted to know. “Has something suddenly changed? You’re not dying, are you?” he asked, alarmed.
“No, I’m not dying,” Dan assured his brother. “What happened was that I was in my cabin—”
Jamie cut in, surprised. “You have a cabin?”
“Yes,” Dan answered. He didn’t want to get into all that right now. That was for later. “Long story,” he said, waving it away.
Jamie was starved for any and all information concerning Dan, not to mention the rest of his family, except for his sister Bella, who was still in Rust Creek Falls, and other sister Dana, who had recently been found.
“Go ahead, I’m all ears,” Jamie told him.
Dan wanted to tell him about this part first, because it was what led to his coming back to Rust Creek Falls and to his seeking out Jamie. “I’ll tell you about that once I finish answering your first question.”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Jamie said, then coaxed, “Go ahead, I’m listening.”
“All right, then.” Taking a breath, Dan began again. “I’d just put in an extra-hard day. Walking into my cabin, I turned on the TV for some company—”
“So you live alone?”
Alone.
Each time Dan heard it, the word burned more and more of a hole in his gut. “Yeah, I do.”
“You never married?” Jamie asked.
Dan shook his head. “Nope.”
How could he marry? His heart was not his to give to anyone. It was already spoken for—even if the woman who it belonged to had no use for it.
When he hesitated, Jamie apologized.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to pry,” he told Dan. “Go on. You walked in, turned on the TV for company and then what?”
When he heard Jamie summarize the events he’d just told him, the words had this incredibly lonely ring to them. He knew he’d felt the same thing time and again, but he’d talked himself into living with it. He’d made himself believe that his life wasn’t as soul-draining as it really was. But now he knew the truth. That he was exceedingly lonely—and that he had made the right decision in coming home.
At least for now.
“And then I heard this voice,” Dan said, continuing with his narrative, “this voice that was filled with pride and love, talking about his triplets.”
“Wait,” Jamie said, stopping his brother. “You heard me on TV? You caught that program that Travis Dalton taped in town? You actually saw The Great Roundup?”
Dan smiled at the eager disbelief he heard in his brother’s voice. “I did.”
“But that segment was on more than a month ago.”
Dan merely nodded and said, “I know.”
“You’ve been here in Rust Creek Falls all this time?”
“No, I just got here,” Dan corrected. He wanted his brother to understand that it had been his cold feet that had kept him from coming. “You’re my first stop. Possibly my only stop because I don’t know where everyone else is, or even if they’re still in Montana.”
But Jamie was still having a hard time making sense out of what he was hearing. The brother he remembered, the one he had idolized, had never been someone to drag his feet.
“I don’t understand. If the show was on over a month ago, what took you so long to get here?”
Dan wasn’t about to lie or make up excuses. “It took me a month to get up the nerve to come and see you. I wasn’t sure if you’d even let me come in your front door, or if you’d take one look at me, slam the door in my face and tell me to go to hell.”
Jamie stared at him, an incredulous smile widening on his lips.
“You were afraid I’d reject you?” he asked.
Dan nodded. “Something like that.”
The idea was so outlandish it almost made Jamie laugh out loud. “You were afraid of your little brother?” he asked, unable to believe that Danny could be afraid of anyone, least of all him.
Dan made no attempt at excuses, or to brazen the situation out. He was long past that sort of thing as far as he was concerned.
“Yes,” Dan admitted, “I was. Because, as far as you were concerned, Luke, Bailey and I had run out on you and the girls. Left you at the mercy of a couple of cranky grandparents, neither of whom was ever going to be up for grandparent of the year. Left you and never tried to get in contact with you,” Dan concluded with a sigh.
For a moment, the stark, honest answer left Jamie speechless. And then he said, “Well, at least you’re not trying to sugarcoat any of it, I’ll give you that.”
“I can’t sugarcoat it,” Dan admitted. “I want you to know that I wanted to see you and the girls, wanted to get in contact with you.” He put a hand on his brother’s shoulder, anchoring him with the sincere look in his eyes. “Not a day went by in those years when I didn’t think about you.”
Jamie believed him. But he still had questions. “So if you felt that way, why didn’t you get in contact with any of us?”
“I didn’t want to disrupt your lives any more than they’d already been disrupted,” Dan told him with sincerity.
“You wouldn’t have disrupted them, you idiot,” Jamie cried. “You would have only made them better.”
Dan sighed again. “Yeah, well...” His voice trailed off. At the time, he’d been convinced he was doing the right thing.
And then, of course, there had been the guilt. That had all but paralyzed him. It had definitely kept him from returning.
Jamie took pity on him. “Water under the bridge,” he told Dan. “Just water under the bridge. What really matters is that you’re here now,” he said, sounding genuinely happy. “Makes my suffering through the taping of that program worth all the agony,” he added with a warm laugh. “Oh damn, where are my manners? Can I offer you something to eat or drink?”
“No, I’m fine,” Dan told him. “Just seeing you again after all this time is all I need.”
“Speaking of need,” Jamie said, “I need you to fill me in.”
“On what?”
“On what you’ve been doing these last twelve years,” Jamie said.
Dan blew out a long breath. He knew he owed Jamie that much. Still, going over that ground would bring up memories he wanted left buried and undisturbed.
He looked at Jamie, wondering where to start. “That, my brother, is a tall order.”
Chapter Two (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
“Well,” Jamie said in response to the unreadable expression on his brother’s face, “think of it as the price you have to pay if you want to get to meet your nephews and niece.”
The triplets, Dan thought. He’d almost forgotten about them.
“Okay,” he replied gamely, “if you’re really serious.”
Jamie managed to keep a straight face for approximately fifteen seconds, and then he finally broke down and laughed.
“I’m just curious about what you’ve been doing, but if you don’t want to talk about it,” he said more soberly, “that’s okay.”
Dan appreciated that his brother wasn’t pressuring him for information. The very fact that Jamie wasn’t encouraged him to share.
“It’s not that I don’t want to talk about it, Jamie. I just don’t want to put you to sleep.” The smile on his face was a tad sheepish. “The last twelve years have been pretty boring.”
The sadness Jamie saw in his brother’s eyes told him that those years weren’t boring so much as they might have left a scar on Dan’s soul. Jamie found himself aching for his brother.
“Tell me when you’re ready,” Jamie said. “No pressure.”
Dan was about to say something in response, but just then, a slender, willowy redhead with lively blue eyes and an infectious smile walked into the room, coming from the back of the house. She looked straight at him.
“I thought I heard you talking to someone,” she said to Jamie.
Both Jamie and his brother rose to their feet in unison.
“Danny,” Jamie said, putting his hand out to the woman who had just crossed over to them, “I’d like you to meet the light of my life, my wife, Fallon.” Affectionately wrapping his arm around her waist, Jamie continued the introduction. “Fallon, this is my older brother Danny.”
Jamie expected a nod of acknowledgment from the pretty young woman. A smile at best. But he quickly discovered that Fallon was just like her husband. Rather than greeting him with a few pleasantries, she left the shelter of her husband’s arm and went straight to him.
The young woman embraced him, giving him a warm hug that swirled straight into his heart.
“Danny! It’s so wonderful to finally meet you,” she cried enthusiastically. “Jamie’s told me so much about you!”
Stunned, still caught up in Fallon’s embrace, Dan looked over her shoulder at his brother. He’d thought that by now, Jamie would have thought of him as a distant memory—if that.
“Really?” he asked.
“Yes,” Fallon replied. Releasing her brother-in-law, she stepped back next to her husband. “Can’t get to know the man without getting to know his family. Though I must admit it took a bit of work at first. Jamie wasn’t much of a talker in the beginning,” she confided. “I think he kind of felt overwhelmed, and under the circumstances, who could blame him?” she said, looking at Jamie fondly. “But once I got him going, he told me all about you and Luke and Bailey, as well as your sisters. Bella and Dana, of course, I got to know myself. You’ve all had a rough life,” she readily acknowledged, “but it can only get better from here on in.”
Before Dan could ask about either Bella or Dana, Jamie told him, “Bella’s still in Rust Creek Falls. She’s married now. And Dana came for a while late last year. Turns out she’s living in Portland, Oregon with a nice family who had adopted her. No word on Liza yet, but we’re still looking.” He smiled broadly at Danny. “Bella and Dana will both be thrilled to know that you’re actually alive.”
The revelation stunned Dan. He stared at his brother. “You didn’t think I was alive?” he asked Jamie incredulously.
“Well, I didn’t hear from you for twelve years. The thought had crossed my mind,” Jamie said. “Anyway, it was Fallon who encouraged me to start looking, not just for you but for all the lost sheep of our family,” he said. He paused to press a kiss to his wife’s temple. “I don’t mind telling you that this woman saved my life.”
Fallon put her hand on her husband’s chest. “Now, don’t get all melodramatic on your brother, Jamie,” Fallon chided.
“No melodrama,” Jamie responded. “Just the plain truth. I was in a really bad way after Paula died,” he told Dan.
“Paula?” Dan asked. It occurred to him that he knew next to nothing about what Jamie had gone through in the last twelve years, just what he had gotten from the TV program.
A pang twisted his gut. He should have been here. Somehow, even though his grandparents had all but thrown him and his older brothers out, he should have found a way to be there for Jamie and his sisters. A way to get over his all-but-soul-crushing guilt, a way to keep them all together as a family.
“His first wife,” Fallon interjected.
The fact that Jamie had been married to someone else first didn’t seem to bother her, Dan observed. She seemed to take it all in stride. Jamie had really lucked out with Fallon, Dan thought. He was genuinely happy for his brother. At least one of them had found happiness, despite the fact that the odds had felt as if they were against all of them.
“The triplets were born prematurely,” Jamie explained, continuing to fill his brother in. “Paula died shortly after that from complications caused by the C-section. For a long while, I felt it was all my fault.”
Confused, Dan wondered how that could possibly be his brother’s fault.
“Paula didn’t want kids. I did.” A semi-sad smile played on his lips. “I guess I missed the sounds of a big family.”
Fallon took over her husband’s narrative. It was clear that she didn’t want him to dwell on what she felt were his unfounded feelings of guilt.
“The whole town pitched in to help Jamie out when Paula passed on. A bunch of us took turns volunteering to take care of the triplets so that he could regain his foothold.”
“I wouldn’t have made it without you,” Jamie told her.
“Without us,” Fallon corrected. “Like I said,” she told Dan, “the whole town pitched in.”
Deftly, Fallon changed the subject, asking Dan, “So, have you come back to Rust Creek Falls to stay?”
“Not to sound as pushy as this redhead,” Jamie interjected, “but have you?”
Dan was still trying to make his mind up about that. “I’m not sure yet.”
Fallon didn’t hesitate. “Well, you’re staying with us while Jamie helps you to make up your mind,” she told Dan. Her tone, warm and friendly, left no room for argument.
Still, Dan felt he had to at least offer a protest. “I can’t impose.”
“Family never imposes,” Jamie insisted. “End of discussion. You’re staying,” he said with finality. Then he got back to his initial question. “So where have you been all this time?”
That was simple enough to answer. “The last ten years I’ve been in Colorado.”
“Colorado?” Jamie repeated. “I can’t picture you in Colorado.”
Dan understood where Jamie was coming from on that. Colorado brought up images of big cities and he was a country boy at heart.
“I’ve been booking dude ranch vacations for city dwellers who fancy themselves cowboys,” Dan told his brother and Fallon. “It’s not a bad living,” he was quick to add. “And I get to spend most of my time on horseback.”
“Now, that I can picture,” Jamie told him. “You said you’ve been in Colorado for the last ten years, but you’ve been gone from Rust Creek Falls for twelve. Where did you go before then?”
“Cheyenne,” Dan answered. “I worked as a ranch hand there—along with Luke and Bailey. But they didn’t much care for it,” he confessed with a sad smile. “They got restless and then, one night, they just took off.” He paused, trying to deal with an unexpected wave of sadness that washed over him. Suppressing a sigh, he told Jamie, “I haven’t seen them since.”
Fallon leaned forward and put her hand up on her brother-in-law’s shoulder. “We’ll find them,” she promised.
“Isn’t she amazing?” Jamie asked him. There was pride in his eyes. “She just keeps spreading optimism wherever she goes, no matter what.”
A light pink hue rose to Fallon’s cheeks as she pointedly ignored her husband’s compliment. Rerouting the conversation again, she asked Dan, “Would you like to meet our kids?”
He could think of nothing that he would like better. “I’d love to,” Dan responded.
“Then come this way. You can come too, Jamie,” she added playfully, as if it was an afterthought. “Now, brace yourself,” she told Dan. “These are not your typical year-and-a-half-old babies. They could use Jared, Henry and Kate in caffeine commercials,” she confided.
“By the way, Kate’s the one with a bow on her head,” Jamie told him as they walked to the bedroom that the triplets occupied when they were downstairs.
He explained that the official nursery was upstairs, but because they wanted the triplets near them as much as possible, they’d created a second room for the babies downstairs where they could take their naps.
“She had such short hair,” Jamie explained, “everyone thought I had three sons. After a while, I got tired of telling them that Kate was a girl, so I put a bow on her to set them straight.”
“Now her hair is finally growing in,” Fallon told him as she led the way into the back room. “Which is a good thing, because she keeps pulling that bow off.”
Dan couldn’t hold back the smile when he stepped into the room and saw the triplets. The two boys were both on their feet, their chubby little fingers grabbing the side of their playpen and shaking it. Dan had a feeling that the playpen’s life expectancy was in serious jeopardy of being severely shortened.
The third triplet was seated on her well-padded bottom, serenely playing with a floppy-eared stuffed bunny, seemingly totally oblivious to the commotion her brothers were creating.
Beaming with unabashed pride, Jamie introduced his triplets.
“Dan, I’d like you to meet Henry and Jared,” he said, indicating the two standing boys. “And this little sweetheart is Kate. Kids,” Jamie said to his triplets, “this is your uncle Danny. Can you say ‘Hi’ to him?” he prompted.
An uneven chorus of something that could be thought to pass for “Hi!” rose up following Jamie’s request.
“They talk?” Dan asked, his voice a mixture of surprise and envy. He knew next to nothing when it came to children and even less than that when it came to babies.
“Talk?” Jamie echoed, then said with a laugh, “They don’t stop talking. Not even in their sleep. Of course, most of the time it sounds like gibberish and I can’t understand what they’re saying, but they seem to be able to communicate with each other just fine.”
“That’s because twins and triplets have a language all their own,” Fallon told her husband.
Dan dropped to his knees beside the playpen to get closer to the three little people who had been instrumental in getting him to finally come home. Something stirred within him as he watched them for a moment.
“Hi, kids.”
Again he received an uneven chorus echoing the greeting. Kate pulled herself up to her feet and made her way over to him. She offered him a sunny smile and just like that, she took him prisoner.
Dan ran his hand along her silky hair. “She’s going to be a charmer,” he told Jamie.
“What do you mean ‘going to be’?” Jamie asked. “She already is one.”
“You’re right,” Dan laughed, unable to take his eyes off the little girl. “My mistake.”
* * *
Dan spent the next hour getting to know his brother’s children as well as his brother’s wife. It was the best hour he could remember spending in the last twelve years.
But then it was time to put the triplets down for a nap.
“I’m afraid you’re going to have to leave the room now,” Fallon told him, apologizing. “I’ll never get them down for their naps if you’re in eyesight.”
“I understand,” Dan said. He was already at the bedroom door, although he did pause for one last backward glance.
“They’re something else, aren’t they?” Jamie said with pride.
“They’re beautiful kids,” Dan agreed. And then he thought of the circumstances that Jamie had been forced to go through shortly after the triplets’ birth. “You must have had a really hard time coping right after Paula’s death,” Dan said with immense sympathy. Again, he fervently wished he could have been there for Jamie.
“It was hard,” Jamie admitted. “But Fallon wasn’t kidding. It felt like the whole town pitched in to help. Otherwise, quite honestly, I don’t know what would have happened or what I would have done. When you have just two hands and three kids, the numbers aren’t exactly in your favor,” he told his brother, his words underscored with a good-natured laugh.
Dan had been under the impression that Fallon had really meant a few people at best. But there was no reason for Jamie to exaggerate. That hadn’t been in the nature of the boy he’d known.
“The whole town?” Dan asked in amazement, just to be sure.
“Yeah, the whole town.” Jamie paused for a moment before adding, “Anne helped, too.”
The mere mention of her name was like a fissure in the dam. The crack split open, spewing forth a deluge of memories upon Daniel.
“Have you been by to see Anne since you got back?” Jamie asked, breaking into his thoughts.
Not a day had gone by in the last twelve years that Dan hadn’t wanted to see Anne Lattimore. That he hadn’t wanted to pack up his meager belongings and find Annie. But he had staunchly never given in to that desire.
Mainly because he was convinced that she was far better off without him.
And even now, as he stood in his brother’s house, battling the urge to ride up and see the woman he had loved practically from the first moment he’d drawn breath, a part of him still felt that she would be better off if he just left well enough alone.
“No,” Dan answered quietly, “I haven’t. When I came into town, I didn’t stop anywhere else. I came straight to your place.”
“I appreciate that, I really do,” Jamie told him. “But if you ask me, I think that you really should go see her.”
Jamie was tempted to say more, but he stopped himself. He pressed his lips together, as if physically blocking the words that had risen to his tongue.
“Maybe later,” Dan demurred.
“There’s already been too much ‘later,’ Danny. Twelve years of ‘later.’ You need to go see her. Now. Before any more time is lost. You can’t get that time back. And the more you drag your feet, the more time you lose,” Jamie insisted.
“When did you get this philosophical bent?” Dan asked, amused.
“Right about the time that I realized that I’d been in love with Fallon for a long time and needed to make her aware of it. Now, no more talk. It’s still early. Go!” He opened the front door and all but pushed his brother out. “And when you’ve seen Anne and talked to her,” he told Dan, “you can come back here—to your home.”
Chapter Three (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
She missed him.
After all this time, she still missed him. Not every minute of every day the way she once had. Sometimes, Anne Lattimore could go a whole week without feeling that awful, painful hollowness boring a gaping hole into the pit of her stomach and working its way out to her soul. And then, suddenly, without giving her any warning, the feeling would be back, descending on her with its full weight, making her ache.
Making her remember.
And then she would have to struggle to fight her way back out of the oppressive pit. Back into the light of day. Back into her life as a single mother and a full-time receptionist at Dr. Brooks Smith’s Veterinary Clinic.
Heaven knew there was enough in her life to keep her busy and most of the time, she was. Very busy. It was only during those evenings when Hank, her ex, would pick up Janie to have her stay overnight with him and the house was extra quiet that her mind would unearth images of Danny Stockton. That was when she would feel tormented.
Tormented, because even now she couldn’t make peace with the fact that he had left town without saying anything.
Left her without saying anything.
After everything they had meant to one another...
No, Anne upbraided herself, she had only thought that they had meant so much to one another. Obviously, she hadn’t meant to Danny nearly as much as he had meant to her.
She knew all the facts by now, having ferreted them out over the years. She knew that Danny’s grandparents had refused to be responsible for him and his older brothers. Knew that they had all but told him and his brothers to leave. But if she had meant something to him, if Danny had loved her the way she loved him, he would have found a way to stay.
And if he couldn’t abide staying in Rust Creek Falls, if he wanted to go somewhere else, she would have gone anywhere in the world with him. All he would have had to do was say that he wanted her to come with him and she would have left in a heartbeat. Left town, left her family, left her dreams of going to college. Left it all for Danny.
All he would have had to do was ask.
But he didn’t ask.
Instead, he just disappeared without a trace, like some magician’s big trick.
Even so, her pride badly wounded, she’d still tried to find him. But no one knew where Danny and his two brothers had gone. It was like they had vanished into thin air. Eventually, she gave up trying to find him, decided to go on with her life and went off to college.
And then Hank Harlow had happened in her life. It wasn’t long after they met that Hank, clearly smitten, asked her to marry him. Ten years her senior, Hank wouldn’t allow the age difference to get in the way. He told her that all he wanted to do was to make her happy.
Anne turned him down as gently as possible.
But Hank wouldn’t be deterred. He kept after her, always the well-mannered gentleman, but at the same time, completely determined.
Eventually, he wore her down.
Or more to the point, Anne’s circumstances had worn her down. She found out that she was pregnant.
Alarmed and yet thrilled about the baby, she tried to find Dan again. She wasn’t any more successful this time around than she had been with her first attempt.
Growing progressively more afraid and feeling completely alone, despite the fact that she did have family back in Rust Creek Falls, she’d accepted Hank’s proposal.
But she couldn’t marry him until she had told him everything. Summoning all her courage, she’d confessed to Hank that she thought he was a very good man, but that she couldn’t love him the way that he loved her. She’d also told him that she was pregnant.
Hank had listened to her very quietly. When she was finished, he told Anne that none of it made any difference to him. He’d still wanted to marry her. Very much.
Moreover, because it was important to her, he’d wanted her to finish college and get her degree. He’d told her that he was financially comfortable, which meant they could hire someone to look after the baby once he or she was born and she could attend her classes.
They were married shortly after that and Hank was true to his word, hiring a nanny when Janie was born. He wouldn’t let anything interfere with Anne finishing college. When she graduated, they came back to Rust Creek Falls. Hank bought a ranch and she found a job as a receptionist at the vet clinic.
For five years, everything seemed to be going well. Hank was good to her and he doted on Janie. He was definitely a good husband and a wonderful father, no one could dispute that, least of all her.
But eventually, Hank came to terms that he was never going to win her over, never get her to love him the way that he had hoped. Because she was in love and would always be in love with Daniel Stockton.
Their divorce was amicable and while Hank agreed to give her custody of Janie, he reserved the right to see the little girl and to have her over at his ranch whenever he wanted.
His only stipulation for the divorce was that their secret would remain a secret. As far as Janie and everyone else in Rust Creek Falls knew, he was Janie’s father. Anne agreed and Hank continued to cherish the role of father.
As for the divorce, though it was sudden, no one really questioned it. Their friends and family all just assumed that she had been too young to get married and that, most important of all, she had married Hank while still on the rebound from Danny.
Anne never told anyone otherwise, thinking it was best for Janie if everyone just went on believing that. That way, they wouldn’t go digging any further.
And her secret would remain just that, a secret. There was no reason for it to be otherwise.
Anne sighed as she pushed the memories aside. Instead, she rummaged through her pantry for dinner ingredients, not really sure what it was that she was looking for.
“What’s the matter, Mom?” Janie asked.
Anne blinked, realizing that she’d allowed herself to really drift off. She hadn’t even heard her daughter come into the kitchen. Facing her now, she quickly offered Janie a smile.
“What makes you ask that? There’s nothing the matter, honey,” she told her daughter a bit too quickly.
“Yes, there is,” Janie insisted. “You’ve got that funny look on your face, that look you get when something’s wrong.”
At eleven, Janie looked younger because of her size. She was a shade under four foot ten and weighed seventy-five pounds, making the blue-eyed blonde smaller than average. Despite that, Janie acted older. Sometimes, Anne had the feeling that her daughter was the adult and she was still that young girl who had fallen head over heels for Danny Stockton.
But this was not the time to indulge herself or wallow in old memories that belonged locked away in the past.
She knew that Janie was waiting for her to say something. She said the first thing that came to her mind. “I’m just trying to figure out what to make for dinner,” she told her daughter. It wasn’t exactly the most creative excuse, but for now, it was all she had. “Any suggestions?”
“How about hamburgers?” Janie asked brightly.
Anne shook her head. “Hamburgers are for when I don’t really have time to make dinner. The whole point of my coming home early is that I could make you something special.”
Far more intuitive than most girls her age, Janie was immediately alert. She looked at her mother suspiciously. “Are you going away, Mom?”
Caught completely off guard, her daughter’s question surprised her. Why would Janie think something like that? “No—”
“Am I going away?” Janie wanted to know.
Not for the first time, she couldn’t help thinking that her daughter was exceptionally bright. Janie could always pick up on her moods and seemed to instinctively know if something was bothering her—sometimes even before she knew it.
“No, of course not,” Anne denied, making certain that she sounded calm. “Can’t a mom come home early and make something special for her best daughter?”
Janie gave her a look as she said, “I’m your only daughter.”
“There’s that, too,” Anne said with a fond laugh as she gave her daughter a one-armed hug. “My best and only daughter.”
“I like hamburgers, Mom,” Janie reminded her pointedly.
Anne surrendered, secretly relieved that she was getting out of this so easily. Janie would normally grill her a lot longer.
“Okay, hamburgers it is,” she told her daughter. “But later on, when you’re staring down at your plate and you decide that you would have wanted to have something a little fancier, just remember, the hamburgers were your idea.”
“I’ll remember,” Janie promised.
Anne opened the refrigerator to make sure she had the necessary main ingredient for this particular “feast.” She did.
“Okay,” she said to Janie, closing the refrigerator door again. “Now go do your homework.”
“I can do it after dinner,” Janie protested, suddenly acting her age again.
“Yes, I know. I also know it’s better to get your homework out of the way first so that you don’t have it hanging over your head all evening. Remember, your father’s coming to pick you up for a sleepover tonight.”
Janie sighed dramatically, accepting defeat. “Okay, okay, if you don’t want my bright, shining face looking up at you adoringly while you cook, I will go and do my homework.”
Eleven, going on thirty, Anne thought with a smile. “Thank you,” she said. “I’ll see your bright, shining face looking at me from across the dining room table at dinner—after you finish your homework.”
Janie walked away, shaking her head. “You know, you should have been a teacher, not a receptionist,” the little girl complained.
“Oh no,” Anne answered, pretending to shudder at the very thought of being a teacher. “Corralling one student is all I can handle. I’d never survive a whole classroom full of them,” Anne assured her daughter. “Now go, make me proud.”
A giant, deep-down-from-her-toes sigh was her daughter’s only response.
Anne’s laugh was followed by a soft sigh as another memory corkscrewed through her. Janie was just like Danny had been at that age. Bright, sunny, eager to twist things until he got his way. And he always managed to do it without annoying anyone.
Sometimes, when she looked at Janie, she could really see Danny. See his face, see his mannerisms.
Anne could feel a tightening in the pit of her stomach again.
She supposed that was what had gotten her started today. Remembering what it had been like when she and Danny had been together.
Well, you just stop it right now! she ordered herself fiercely. She didn’t have time for this. There was no point in thinking about someone who hadn’t been in her life for twelve years.
Anne glanced at her watch. It was still early. Dinner was not for another hour and a half. Since Janie wanted hamburgers, dinner would take no more than fifteen minutes to prepare. That left her with enough time to do something she could actually regard as being fun.
That didn’t happen very often.
So infrequently, as a matter of fact, that she couldn’t think of anything right off the bat.
Stumped, she was tempted to call her daughter back into the room. They could watch a program together, one of those cartoons that Janie used to love so much when she was a little girl. Granted Janie was almost an adult—or so her daughter liked to think—but Anne knew that Janie secretly still loved watching animated films, especially the ones that were well made and had heart.
Heaven only knew how much longer that would last, Anne mused, going into the family room and looking at the television guide. It wouldn’t be all that long before Janie would feel obligated to turn her back on everything and anything that was connected to the little girl she had once been.
It was a rite of passage, Anne thought sadly.
She was just about to turn on the TV and call her daughter into the family room when she heard the doorbell.
Someone was at her door.
Anne looked at her watch. Ordinarily, she would be still at the animal clinic at this time. Her friends all knew that, which meant that this wasn’t a social call. And it was way too early for Hank.
Maybe one of her neighbors had seen that her car was in the driveway and was bringing over their beloved dog or cat for some free medical advice. For some reason, some of her neighbors thought that just because she worked at the vet clinic, she knew everything that the vets did.
Only one way to find out who was at her door, she thought with a resigned sigh.
She went to the door, preparing to dispatch the neighbor and their pet as quickly as possible.
Opening the door, Anne said, “What seems to be the problem?” before she actually looked at the person who was standing on her doorstep.
The word problem came out as more of a squeak than an actual word.
Her heart was suddenly pounding in her ears. Anne blinked, just in case she actually was seeing things.
The person on her doorstep didn’t vanish, didn’t change.
She had imagined this very scene so many times in the last dozen years, she couldn’t even begin to count them. Now that it actually seemed to be taking place, she felt as if her entire body had been dipped in glue, then held fast against some invisible canvas. She was unable to move.
Unable to even breathe.
All she could do was stare at him in complete disbelief.
Slowly, she fought back from the emotional paralysis that held her in its grip, struggling to say something, a sentence, a word.
A sound.
“Hello, Anne.”
His deep voice rumbled, the sound echoing within her very chest, interfering with the beat of her heart, or what might have passed for a beat right now if it wasn’t as paralyzed as the rest of her.
Finally, with the inside of her mouth drier than the desert and swiftly turning into sand, Anne forced herself to say something.
Or rather, to say a word. A name.
His name.
“Danny?” she asked hoarsely, her throat all but closing up.
She saw a smile, that same faint, funny little smile she had loved so well, curve his lips just before he confirmed what she was asking.
“Yes, Anne, it’s me.”
The moment he said that, she felt them. Felt the tears that she had been harboring within her for the last twelve years, tears she’d forbade herself to ever shed, even once. She had been able to maintain almost superhuman control over herself, afraid that if she ever allowed herself to cry, to shed so much as a single tear, then there would be no way to stop the flow.
Twelve years’ worth of tears.
Anne bit her lower lip, desperately trying to prevent them from falling. Struggling to keep from losing the battle she felt she was doomed to lose.
And then she heard him hesitantly say her name again, the name he used to call her, when the world was so full of possibilities and their love was brand-new.
“Annie?”
Chapter Four (#u8fb94ecd-3b95-582a-9c96-f40f149a2304)
In the minutes before he’d knocked on Jamie’s door, anticipating the end of a twelve-year separation, Dan had experienced a strong bout of nerves. But he realized now that that had been a piece of cake in comparison to what he’d went through just before he finally rang Annie’s doorbell.
For one thing, he hadn’t been sure who would be on the other side of that door, Annie or her husband.
Jamie hadn’t told him about Annie’s marriage when he’d urged him to go see her, but he’d known about Annie’s marriage to Hank for a long time now.
He wasn’t quite as technologically backward as everyone obviously seemed to think. During one of his bouts of homesickness, he had availed himself of the computer in the ranch town’s library and poked around on social media, searching for information about someone he knew.
About Anne.
He himself wasn’t on any websites, but that didn’t keep him from looking for information about Anne.
And he’d found it.
He found several photos of Annie, her husband and her little girl posted. He remembered the first time he saw the photo of Annie and Hank. It felt as if someone had taken a jagged knife to his chest and savagely carved out his heart. It was also the last time he looked at that site. It hurt too much.
But then he told himself that he had no right to feel that way. He’d left her life; there was no reason to believe she would spend her days pining away for him. He’d left town—and Annie—because he felt he was unworthy of her, felt that he didn’t deserve someone as good and pure as her.
That meant that she was free to go on with her life, to marry anyone she chose.
And he was happy for her, happy that she had found someone to love, someone to take care of her. Someone who had obviously started a family with her. He had no right to feel as wounded as he did.
Nonetheless, wounded was how he felt.
And after all these years, there was no denying that he still loved her.
Dan had thought twice about just turning up on her doorstep.
And then he’d thought some more.
However, his need to see Annie again, to just look at her outweighed his fear that she would see right through him and guess how he still felt about her.
But that was his problem, not Annie’s, and for her sake, he intended to keep his guard up and maintain a tight rein on all those feelings. Above all, he didn’t want to risk making her feel uncomfortable in his presence, not for anything in the world.
Annie stared at the man on her doorstep. A thousand questions instantly sprang up in her head, crowding out one another. A thousand questions that she wanted to put to him. But giving voice to any of them would only tear at the scabs that covered wounds which had taken so very long to heal.
And then there was the little girl who was only two rooms away.
Danny’s little girl.
It was one thing when she couldn’t find Danny to tell him that he was a father, but it was entirely another thing when all that separated Danny from finding out that he was a father was her sudden, very strong onslaught of cold feet.
It went beyond cold feet. Telling him wouldn’t just upend Danny’s world. Finding out that Danny was Janie’s father instead of Hank would cause total chaos in her world, as well.
And then there was Hank to think of.
He’d been good to her. Good when he didn’t have to be. She couldn’t allow him to be on the receiving end of such a blow. For all intents and purposes, Hank had been Janie’s father from the moment the little girl had been born. She hadn’t forced the role on Hank; he’d taken it on gladly.
Hank loved their daughter and Janie was their daughter. He had raised Janie with her for five years. And then, even after they had gotten a divorce, he hadn’t divorced himself from Janie, hadn’t taken himself out of her life. He considered himself to be Janie’s father even after Anne had told Hank who Janie’s real father was. She couldn’t just pull the rug out from under him now, not without giving him fair warning.
A lot of fair warning.
And yet, here he was, Danny Stockton, like some ghost out of the past, standing on her doorstep. If Janie came into the room, all he would need was to take one look at the little girl and he’d know she was his.
She could feel her stomach tying itself up into a knot.
“What are you doing here?” Anne heard herself finally asking, feeling as if she was trapped in some sort of a surreal dream.
All this time and she hadn’t changed a bit, Dan thought, trying not to stare at her. If anything, Annie was even more beautiful than he remembered.
“I was in the neighborhood and thought I’d drop by,” Danny answered glibly. “No?” he asked, seeing the look on her face. He shrugged, feeling awkward, something he’d never felt around her before. “Well, it was worth a shot. The truth is, I saw a clip on TV a month ago. Jamie and his triplets were in it. After the program was over, I couldn’t stop seeing their faces. I knew I had to come back to Rust Creek Falls to see them.”
You had to come back to see them. But not me. “Oh, I see,” Anne murmured, her voice stilted.
“And you,” Dan added awkwardly, realizing his oversight. “I wanted to see you.” He blew out a ragged breath and then asked, “Can I come in?”
For a moment, it looked as if she was going to say no. But then she stepped back and gestured for him to enter the house.
“Mom?” Janie called out. She ventured into the living room and looked uncertainly at the stranger talking to her mother.
For the second time in as many minutes, Anne felt her heart lodge itself in her throat as she all but stopped breathing.
Could Danny see it? Could he see that Janie was his daughter?
She slanted a hesitant look in his direction. Danny was smiling broadly at the little girl.
“Hi. You must be Janie,” he said. There was clearly awe in his eyes.
The picture of confidence and self-assurance, Janie raised her chin. “I am. Who are you?” she wanted to know.
“Janie,” Anne chided her daughter for responding so bluntly.
“No, that’s okay,” Danny was quick to tell her. “She’s being direct. That’s a very positive quality to have.” He turned his attention to the little girl. “I’m Daniel Stockton,” he told her. “I used to live in Rust Creek Falls.”
“And you were friends with my mom?” Janie asked, curious.
Anne felt a sharp pang in her heart, afraid of saying anything. Afraid of giving herself away.
He looked at Anne for a moment before he answered. “Yes,” he replied quietly. “I was friends with your mom.”
“And my dad?” Janie wanted to know, probing further.
“No,” Dan answered truthfully. “I’m afraid that I never met your dad.”
Growing progressively more apprehensive, Anne didn’t want this exchange to go any further. Not until she set a few ground rules to make sure that nothing was exposed ahead of time.
Until then, she needed to keep Janie and Danny away from one another.
“Did you finish your homework, young lady?” she asked her daughter.
“No, not yet,” Janie began. “But—”
Anne cut her off. “Then I suggest you go back and finish it. That’s what we agreed to, remember?” she reminded her daughter.
Janie made a face. “I don’t remember agreeing,” she protested. “You just told me to do it.”
“Same thing, puddin’,” Anne told her daughter affectionately. “Now go,” she said, pointing toward the rear of the house where Janie’s room was located, “and don’t come back until you’ve finished doing it.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Janie sighed with a pout. Turning, she dragged her feet as she went to her room.
“She looks like you.”
So worried that he’d see himself in their daughter, Anne didn’t hear him at first. And then his words replayed themselves in her head. She turned around to face Danny, a little stunned.
“What?”
“I said she looks like you.” There was no missing the fondness in his voice. Or the wistfulness. “A miniature carbon copy of what you looked like at that age. She’s what, about nine, right?”
Nine would make her safe, Anne thought. If Danny thought that Janie was nine, then he’d definitely believe that the little girl was Hank’s daughter and that would be that. Fear of discovery would be taken off the table once and for all.
But saying yes would be lying, Anne thought and somehow, she just couldn’t bring herself to lie to Danny after all these years.
The word stuck in her throat like a fishbone that had been accidentally swallowed.
Rather than say yes or no, Anne focused on something else he had just said. “You really think she looks like me?”
“Absolutely,” he assured her. “Right down to her stubborn streak.”
“What does a stubborn streak look like?” Anne asked wryly.
Dan smiled at her, fighting a very strong desire to touch her. Not in the intimate way he used to—after all, she was another man’s wife now—but just to put his hand on her shoulder, to connect with her for the smallest of moments.
“I’m looking at it right now,” he told Annie. And then his smile faded as he grew serious. “When you opened the door just now, you asked me what I was doing here.”
Anne inclined her head, slightly embarrassed. “Not exactly the politest way to greet someone after twelve years,” she admitted, then went on to say, “but in my defense, you did catch me by surprise.”
Lord, but she looked good, he couldn’t help thinking, all but devouring her with his eyes. “You know, I didn’t exactly tell you the truth when I said I was in the neighborhood.”
“I had my suspicions,” she replied with a soft laugh. Rust Creek Falls was in no one’s neighborhood. “So why are you here?” she asked.
Dan cleared his voice before saying, “I came to apologize for leaving you the way I did.”
Stunned by his admission, Anne looked at the man she had once thought of as the love of her life. It took her more than a moment to find her tongue.
“You know, over the last dozen years, I must have imagined this scene a hundred different ways. The only thing all those scenes had in common, besides your apology, was that I always felt relieved when I heard you apologize. I felt somehow vindicated.
“But I’m not vindicated, not relieved,” she told him with feeling. “I’m just...sad, I guess. Sad about all the years in between that were lost. Why did you leave like that?”
Dan shook his head. That was something he didn’t want to get into. It was a secret he would most likely take to his grave rather than burden someone else with.
“I didn’t have a choice,” was all he allowed himself to say.
Anne frowned ever so slightly. That excuse just didn’t hold any water for her. “Everyone always has a choice,” she told him.
“I didn’t,” he replied.
There had to be more, something he wasn’t telling her. “But—”
Dan changed the subject. “I also wanted to tell you that I’m happy for you.”
For a moment, still trying to understand what Danny wasn’t telling her, she was caught off guard. His last words completely confused her.
“What did you say?”
“I said I’m happy for you,” Danny repeated. “Happy that you’ve moved on. That you found someone you cared about and got married. That you went on to have a beautiful daughter.”
She’s your beautiful daughter, she thought, an unexpected wave of anger filling her.
Anne continued staring at him. “You’re happy for me,” she repeated in disbelief, like someone who didn’t quite understand the gist of the words she was saying.
Dan nodded, forcing a smile to his lips. “Yes, I am.”
Did he even have a clue how much it stung to hear him say that to her? How much it actually physically tore her apart?
Why didn’t you come back to me? Why didn’t you show up on my doorstep years ago and tell me that you couldn’t bear to live without me? Why did you just vanish out of my life without a trace, leaving me to face being pregnant all by myself?
But she couldn’t say any of that, couldn’t risk him knowing the truth, at least not yet. Perhaps not ever. There were other people to consider.
So, instead, she asked, “Where were you all these years?”
Anne struggled to keep the accusation out of her voice, doing her best to sound like just an old friend trying to catch up with another old friend instead of a spurned lover who’d given her heart away and had it torn in two more than a decade ago.
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Marie Ferrarella
Тип: электронная книга
Жанр: Современные любовные романы
Язык: на английском языке
Издательство: HarperCollins
Дата публикации: 16.04.2024
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О книге: Congratulations…it′s a girl! Talk about mending fences—have you heard that rugged rancher Daniel Stockton is back in town? It′s been ten years since Dan left Rust Creek Falls with Anne Lattimore′s heart in tow. She soon married someone else and had a child, but their marriage didn′t last. We here at the Gazette think we know why. It has something to do with Anne′s beautiful daughter, Janie…Now that Dan has returned, will Anne find the courage to forgive him—and tell him that sweet Janie is really his? Will Dan find the courage to ask for a second chance? Stay tuned, you hopeful romantics, to see if love really can conquer all!