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Straight From The Hip
Susan Mallery


Izzy has always been the fearless Titan sister.But when an oil rig blows up, leaving her barely able to see, her sisters find themselves as concerned by her emotional withdrawal as by the possibility that the explosion was no accident.Are the mind games their long-lost brother Garth has been playing turning physical? Or is someone else out to get them? When her sisters enroll her in a survivor training camp, Izzy is not happy. Nick, her instructor, is determined that she won't be left in the dark. In more ways than one.But if he tells her the terrible truth behind why he's helping her, he'll never see her again. Unless they're both willing to take the biggest risk of all.









Rave reviews for New York Times

bestselling author

SUSAN MALLERY


Sweet Spot

“Mallery is in top-notch form as she takes troubled and stubborn individuals and portrays their emotional growth. Drama and trauma abound in this winner!”

—Romantic Times BOOKreviews

“I strongly recommend Sweet Spot, especially to readers who like their family melodramas spiked with lots of laughter and hot romance.”

—The Romance Reader

Sweet Talk

“Sweet Talk is one sweet read! Susan Mallery delivers a deliciously satisfying first book in her new wonderfully written Bakery Sisters trilogy.”

—The Romance Readers Connection (4 1/2 stars)

“Amusing, heartfelt and wildly romantic, Sweet Talk is the perfect romance.”

—Joyfully Reviewed

“Susan Mallery provides a powerful, passionate backdrop to a fine contemporary romance.”

—Harriet Klausner

Accidentally Yours

“Mallery has once again proven to be a superb writer; romance novels just don’t get much better than this.”

—Booklist

“If you’re looking for heart-tugging emotions elaborately laced with humor, then Mallery is the author for you.”

—Romantic Times BOOKreviews

Tempting

“At turns witty and poignant, this hard-to-put-down book will appeal to a broad spectrum of readers.”

—Booklist, starred review

Sizzling

“[A] tasty dish…Mallery’s prose is luscious and provocative, and her characters worth following from book to book.”

—Publishers Weekly

“Sizzling is simply dazzling! You’ll laugh, you’ll hoot, you’ll raise your eyebrows, and yes, you’ll cry buckets, so have those tissues handy…. Highly Recommended!”

—The Romance Readers Connection


Straight from the Hip

Susan Mallery






www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)



STRAIGHT FROM THE HIP




CONTENTS


CHAPTER ONE

CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER FOUR

CHAPTER FIVE

CHAPTER SIX

CHAPTER SEVEN

CHAPTER EIGHT

CHAPTER NINE

CHAPTER TEN

CHAPTER ELEVEN

CHAPTER TWELVE

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

CHAPTER NINETEEN




CHAPTER ONE


IN THE MOVIES there was always a warning before something bad happened. Music swelled, the good guy promised everything would be fine now or the camera suddenly went into slow motion.

Life wasn’t so tidy.

Izzy Titan sat in the window seat, as she had every day for the past month, staring out at a blurry world and feeling sorry for herself. While it wasn’t a career choice everyone would make, it filled the day. She ignored her sisters’ pleas that she join them for lunch or shopping or even come downstairs to dinner. Like a regular person. When it got too annoying, she pointed out she wasn’t regular anymore—she was handicapped. If that didn’t work, she slammed the door and locked it until they went away. She’d always given everything she had, so she was ready to become the self-pity queen, if necessary.

Finally her sisters stopped bugging her. Which should have been a really big clue.

There wasn’t any warning. One minute she was sitting in her usual spot, the next, someone grabbed her around the waist, pulled her to her feet, then tossed her over a very broad, very hard shoulder.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” she yelled as blood rushed to her head, making her a little dizzy.

“My job. Go ahead and fight me all you want. You can’t hurt me.”

It was a challenge she couldn’t ignore. But when she tried to kick her attacker, he wrapped one arm around her legs, holding her still. Wiggling didn’t help either. The man had muscles like rock and a month of immobilizing self-pity had left her girlishly weak.

“I swear,” she began, as the guy turned and started walking. “Do you know who I am?”

“Izzy Titan. Hey, Skye.”

Hey, Skye?

Izzy raised her head and tried to make the room focus. Unfortunately it was dark and blurry and she couldn’t see any details.

“Skye?” she yelled. “Are you there?”

“Oh, Izzy.” Her sister sounded concerned, but not worried. Not afraid. “We didn’t know what else to do.”

“We?”

“I’m here, too,” Lexi, her other sister, said. “This is for your own good.”

“Having me kidnapped?”

“Nick comes very highly recommended. You told us that your doctors wanted to put you on an antidepressant, which you wouldn’t agree to. This is better.”

“What?”

“You wouldn’t leave your room or talk to us. It’s been a month, Izzy.”

“You’re having me kidnapped because I wouldn’t go shopping with you? Are you insane?”

They moved into the hallway. She could tell because the room got darker and her fingers brushed against the walls. Then they were going down, down, down into more darkness.

Each step jarred her entire body. If she’d had that lunch her sisters were so hysterical about she would be throwing it up, right about now.

“I’m not kidding,” she yelled. “Stop this right now. All of you. Nick, I don’t care what my sisters said, I didn’t agree to this. Put me down or I swear I’ll throw your ass in jail for so long, you’ll actually learn to enjoy being Bubba’s love slave.”

“You signed a release,” rock-guy said calmly, still moving through the house.

“What?”

“You signed a release. I’ve got it here in my pocket.”

Izzy wanted to scream in frustration as she remembered Skye asking her to sign a few checks so her sister could pay Izzy’s bills. “She tricked me. I’m blind! I didn’t know what I was signing.”

They went outside. She saw the blurry outline of trees and the welcome light and heat of the sun.

“You shouldn’t sign what you can’t read,” Nick told her.

She could hear the humor in his voice and that really pissed her off. Seconds later, he opened a car door and dumped her onto a smooth leather seat. Before he could close the door, she pushed past him and bolted for freedom. She made it all of three steps before he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her against him.

It was like pressing against the side of a mountain. She kicked and tried to pull her arm free. Irritation turned to fury and betrayal. She turned toward the house—at least she could see something that big—and assumed her sisters were on the porch.

“How could you do this to me?” she demanded. “You’re my family.”

“Izzy, we love you.” There were tears in Skye’s voice.

Good, Izzy thought furiously. She hoped Skye felt guilty for the rest of her life.

“We didn’t know what else to do,” Lexi called, sounding less than sure.

“I would never do this to you,” Izzy screamed. “Don’t think I’ll ever forgive you. Ever!”

The last word was cut short as she was tossed back into the rear of a car or SUV. She couldn’t tell which. The door slammed shut before she could run again. She lunged for the door handle, only there wasn’t one. Nor could she open the windows.

Seconds later she discovered a thick, mesh screening behind the seat and between her and the front of the vehicle. She was trapped.

She heard the door open and vaguely saw Nick slide behind the wheel. Then they were driving away. Her sisters had hired a stranger to take her from her home and do God-knows-what to her. They’d abandoned her. No. This was worse—this was actual action on their part. The two people she’d counted on her entire life had discovered she was too much trouble and had tossed her out like the trash.



FOR THE NEXT THREE HOURS, Nick Hollister drove ten miles above the speed limit. He wanted to go faster, but knew he couldn’t outrun the inevitable. His pretty, dark-haired passenger was staring out the window with a determination that told him she was about ten seconds from losing it.

“You can cry if you want to,” he said. “It won’t bother me.” He’d seen a lot worse than tears.

Izzy didn’t turn toward him. “I won’t give you the satisfaction.”

“You think I win if you cry?”

“Don’t bullies always enjoy knowing they’ve hurt someone? You didn’t win. You can’t break me.”

She raised her chin as she spoke, instinctively defying him. Good, he thought grimly. She was going to need every ounce of strength she had if she wanted to find her way back. Which was his job—to make sure she did.

“Break you?” he asked, ignoring that she’d called him a bully. He’d stormed into her life and taken her away from everything she knew. Hardly comfortable circumstances. He understood the fear of the unknown, although her unknown was a whole lot more controlled than his had been. “Dramatic much?”

“Hey, you’re the one who tossed me into the back of a car.”

“SUV.”

“Whatever. This is kidnapping. I get to be however I want.”

“Your sisters know where you are and what will happen when you get there.”

“And I should find that comforting why?” She swallowed. “Don’t even talk to me.”

He heard the fear in her voice. He could see it in the way she kept herself stiff. Behind fear was terror and while he wanted her attention, he didn’t need it that bad.

“My name is Nick Hollister,” he said, using the same tone that calmed unbroken horses. “I run a school that teaches corporate survival training. That pays the bills. I also take in kids who have suffered a traumatic loss or been victims of a violent crime. I teach them how to survive in my world. That helps them cope with their own.”

Izzy stared out the window, obviously ignoring him. He wondered how much she could actually see.

“Your sisters asked me to take you on for a few weeks, to help you adjust to being blind.”

“I’m not blind,” she snapped. “I have thirty percent of my sight.”

“You’re acting like you’re blind,” he told her. “You’ve been hiding in your room for a month.”

“It’s not like I can do anything else.”

“Your life is over? Because of one little challenge? That’s impressive.”

“Shut up,” she yelled. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. You can see fine.”

“Wouldn’t it be interesting if I couldn’t?” He swerved slightly as he spoke. The SUV swayed. Izzy didn’t bother looking up.

“Very funny.”

“I thought it was,” he said. “Look. They care about you. Your sisters,” he added, in case she wasn’t following.

This time she did glance at him, only to roll her eyes. The hazel irises were unmarred by her injury. “I’m more than capable of carrying on a conversation. I’m probably smarter than you.”

“I doubt that.”

“Oh, please.”

“How smart is sitting on your ass, feeling sorry for yourself?”

She straightened and glared at him. “I was in an explosion,” she said, speaking slowly, as if to make sure he would understand. “I could have been killed.”

“But you weren’t.”

“I was seriously injured and I lost most of my eyesight.”

“Which you could get back tomorrow if you weren’t such a girl about the surgery.”

He glanced in the rearview mirror in time to see her narrow her gaze.

“A girl?” she asked softly.

“Yeah. You know. Chicken. Lacking in bravery.”

“That’s it!” she yelled. “Let me out, right here. Let me out or I swear, I’ll kill you myself. I’ll rip you apart with my bare hands and feed your body to the snakes.”

“Snakes wouldn’t eat human flesh.”

“Shut up!”

“Skye didn’t say anything about you being hysterical.”

“Let me out!”

“No.”

She grabbed the mesh screening and rattled it, but it had withstood a lot more than a scrawny woman without much muscle on her.

“She did warn me you would be difficult,” he said. “I charge extra for that.”

Izzy sank back in the seat and resumed staring out the back window.

“If you won’t have the surgery, then you have to survive with what you have,” he told her. “That’s where I come in. I teach you how to make it. You’re staying with me until you can be on your own.”

“What if I don’t want to be on my own?”

“You think your sisters want you hanging around all the time? They have lives. You’re what? Twenty-five? Twenty-six? You ready to give up so fast?”

“Go to hell.”

“I’ve already been there.”

He turned onto the familiar paved, private road and drove toward the two-story main house. He’d bought the run-down ranch nearly eight years before. Neighboring ranchers leased his pasture for their cattle, while he used the twenty acres of wilderness for his retreats. He kept a dozen horses in the big barn and had built several guest-houses where clients stayed. There were meeting facilities, a restaurant-grade kitchen that could serve up to fifty at a time and a big media room that rivaled a multiplex.

Not that Izzy would deal with much more than the barn. He planned to work her hard enough that she didn’t have time to feel sorry for herself. The little he knew about her told him she would fight him every step of the way, but he didn’t care about that. He would win, as she put it, in the end because he had to.

He parked in front of the house and turned off the engine.

“We’re here,” he said in the silence.

Izzy folded her arms across her chest and stared out the window.

“When I let you out, you can run if you want. We’re about a mile from our closest neighbor and ten miles from the nearest town. But if you want to go looking, I won’t stop you. The temperature is close to a hundred. Without water, you’ll last maybe three days. Assuming you don’t get bit by a rattler and die sooner.”

“Oooh,” Izzy said, still not looking at him. “I’m all tingly with fear. Want to threaten me with whips and chains next?”

“I don’t usually work with adults, but I’ve made an exception for you. Don’t think this is going to be easy. You’ll work for your room and board. No work, no food.”

She snapped her head around until she was facing him. “My sisters are paying you. You can’t starve me.”

He grinned. “I can do anything I want. I’m not the one who’s blind.”

“Fuck you.”

“You’re not my type.”

If there hadn’t been mesh between them, Izzy would have scrambled over the seat and gone after Nick with everything she had. He was so smug and mean and dismissive. Didn’t he know what she’d been through? She’d lost most of her sight. It was easy to be oh, so confident when you hadn’t suffered. She would bet Nick didn’t know anything about being afraid.

She hated him and right now she hated her sisters. It was hard to say who she resented more. Anger burned within her, making her want to lash out. The problem was there wasn’t anyone she could fight. At least not yet.

Nick climbed out of the SUV and walked around to her side. The door opened. She felt the blast of afternoon heat on her skin.

She wanted to be back at Lexi’s house, in the cool room with the window seat. Over the past month, the four walls had been a refuge. But her sisters had sent her away. She was on her own.

She slid out of the seat and followed Nick into a large house. The second they walked inside, the light dimmed and so did her ability to see. The world darkened until it was little more than blurry shapes.

“This is the main house,” he said. “You’ll be sleeping upstairs. First door on the left. There’s an attached bathroom. You’ll find your luggage there. You can unpack later. This is the living room. We don’t use it much. Through here is the kitchen.”

She knew from his voice he’d moved away, but had trouble seeing. She managed to follow him, only to bump into a table and then trip on a single step he hadn’t bothered to mention. She tried to catch herself, but there was too much momentum. The ground raced toward her.

A familiar strong arm grabbed her around the waist and jerked her to her feet.

“Maybe you should use a cane,” he said.

“Maybe you should warn me about stairs.”

“You’ll figure it out.”

“That’s it?” she demanded. “Let’s pause for a moment, because your incredible concern is making me all teary-eyed. I fell.”

“I know. So what? You’re going to fall. Then you’re going to get up and move on. Or are you the type to just lie there, feeling sorry for yourself? Never mind. I already know the answer.”

She wanted to tell him she wasn’t like that. She was the one who climbed mountains and jumped out of airplanes and swam with sharks. She didn’t believe in self-pity or giving up. At least she hadn’t until the explosion.

“You don’t understand,” she told him.

“You sure about that?”

She heard footsteps, but couldn’t tell the direction. Who else was here and what would he or she want from her?

“Oh, you’re back. Good. I have papers for you to sign, Nick. And you must be Izzy. I’ve heard so many wonderful things about you.”

The man reached for her hand and shook it. His fingers were nearly as soft and smooth as Skye’s or Lexi’s.

“This is going to be fun. You’re staying here in the house. You know that, right? Upstairs. I picked out your room myself. It has great light. Is Nick taking you on the tour? Don’t you love the kitchen? I swear Norma, our cook-slash-housekeeper is going to kill me with her biscuits. I can’t resist them but I refuse to let my jeans get any tighter. I love your hair. Are those curls natural? They’re beautiful. Don’t you think they’re beautiful, Nick?”

“Stunning.” Nick sounded more resigned than impatient as he spoke.

Izzy turned toward the enthusiastic new guy. “Who are you?”

The man laughed. “Oh, silly me. Introductions are essential. I’m Aaron. Aaron Levine. Two A’s. I work for Nick.” He linked arms with her and led her into the kitchen.

“I’m his manager. I take care of all the bookings for the corporate retreats and oversee the retreats from start to finish. I make sure everything runs smoothly here at the Hollister Institute. Nick takes care of the kids on his own. The man is rabid about helping those poor children. It’s really very sweet.”

Aaron patted her hand. “Okay—refrigerator on your right, but I wouldn’t go in there if I were you. Norma’s a little possessive about her supplies. There’s a second refrigerator with drinks and snacks in the mudroom. I’ll show you that. Table in the corner. Can you see it? There’s lots of light. Norma rings a bell when it’s time to eat and we all come running like dogs.” He chuckled. “Don’t you just love Texas? Where else can a man get away with wearing snakeskin boots and a giant belt buckle. And you know what they say about the size of a man’s belt buckle.”

Izzy felt more than confused. She felt lost and unsure. With the light pouring in the windows, she could actually see the outline of the tables and shapes she assumed were chairs. But who was Aaron? How had macho Nick gotten involved with charming, funny and obviously gay Aaron? Unless Nick was also…

She glanced in the direction he’d last been.

“No,” came a low voice in her ear.

“No, what?” she asked.

“I know what you’re thinking and no.”

Aaron bumped her shoulder with his. “You mean is Nick gay? I should be so lucky. He has his lady friends he visits in town. It’s all very John Wayne-esque. He rides into town, seduces the schoolteacher then rides off to fight another day.”

Izzy rubbed her forehead. “I don’t remember that movie.”

“You know what I mean. Here’s the mudroom.” Aaron pressed her hand against what felt like a refrigerator. “Plenty of water, soda, that sort of thing. Don’t track in dirt or Norma will skin you alive. And I’m not kidding. I think she collects knives.”

“Aaron?”

“Yes, Nick?”

“I’ll finish Izzy’s tour.”

Aaron stiffened. “I don’t mind.”

“I know, but I’ll do it.”

“Izzy’s new. She’s nervous.”

“She’s also standing right here,” Izzy grumbled, appreciating that Aaron was trying to help, but hating the fact that they were talking about her as if she were a fern.

Nick didn’t say anything. Maybe he was making violent hand gestures or maybe he was just staring. She had no way of knowing. Seconds later, Aaron let go of her arm and stepped back.

“Fine,” he said with a sigh. “Izzy, whatever Nick says, what he really means is that he’s really happy to have you here and that he thinks you’re pretty.” He leaned toward her and dropped his voice to a whisper. “We’ll talk later.”

Then he was gone.

“Follow me,” Nick said and started walking.

Izzy started to point out, yet again, that she was blind, only to realize she could hear his boots on the hardwood floor. She took off after him, clipped her hip on the corner of a counter and stumbled over the threshold of a door.

They went outside. She saw the brighter light and felt the intense heat.

“You’ll be working in the barn,” Nick said, his dark shape moving in front of her. “Rita’s in charge. Do what she says. We have twelve horses that need to be cleaned up after, fed and groomed. That should keep you busy. When you’re more comfortable with your surroundings, you can start exercising them in the corrals. There’s a corporate retreat in a couple of weeks. When that happens, we all pitch in, including you.”

She waited until they passed into shade, then stopped and folded her arms over her chest. “I don’t know who the hell you think you are, but you’re not going to tell me what to do. The only thing you’re going to do is take me back to my sister’s house, right now.”

“Too bad you’re blind, because if you weren’t you could take one look at my face and know that’s not going to happen. Obviously I need to convince you with my words.” He took a step toward her. “No. Clear enough?”

She curled her hands into fists and started hitting the dark shape in front of her. “It’s not clear. Nothing’s clear,” she yelled. “Don’t you get that? Nothing is right. I can’t make it go away. It sucks. My life is ruined and you want to talk to me about horses? About your stupid ranch? I want to go home. I want to be left alone.”

She hit and hit until her arms got tired. Nick didn’t bother defending himself, probably because she wasn’t hurting him. Eventually, she dropped her hands to her sides.

“You about done?” he asked. “Is there more? You want to cry now?”

She hated him, then. Hated him more than she’d hated any human being ever.

“I’ll find a way to crush you,” she vowed.

“You’ll have to find me, first. But that’s the trick, isn’t it? You can’t find anything. If you had the surgery, you could.”

“Get off me about the surgery,” she yelled. “Did they tell you it wasn’t a sure thing? Did they tell you I could end up totally blind?”

“Yes, but the odds are you’ll be fine. Those are odds worth taking.”

“Easy for you to say. You’ve got nothing to lose.”

“Fair enough. The barn is this way.”

He just started walking. As if he expected her to follow him. As if her pain and suffering didn’t matter.

“I’m not even a person to you, am I?” she asked, defeated and exhausted.

“You’re a person. You’re just not much of one right now. Rita will show you everything in the morning. For today, you can groom one of the horses. Skye said you’ve been around horses your whole life so you know what you’re doing.”

They were near the barn. Izzy saw the yawning darkness and didn’t want to go inside. It was too black, there. Too frightening.

“I don’t want this,” she murmured.

“Too bad.”

Maybe this was all designed to break her so she could be built up again. Maybe there was a master plan. Or maybe Nick was just a sick bastard who liked torturing people. Either way, she didn’t much care.

She turned slowly, until she felt the sun in her face. It had to be late afternoon, so the sun was in the west. She thought about sitting in the back of the SUV during the drive and feeling the sun moving across her lap, warming her hands and her thighs. Then she closed her eyes and pictured a map.

They’d driven north for a while, then turned into the sun. So she had to go east to retrace the route. If she started walking, maybe she would find her way back. Or maybe just die. Right now that seemed okay, too.

She spun on her heel and took the first step. She half expected Nick to say something, but he didn’t. She kept moving forward, straining to see anything that could trip her, like a fence or a bush.

“Where are you going?” he called after a couple of minutes.

“Home.”

“Good luck with that.”

She raised her hand and gave him the finger. The sun was hot on her back, but the heat was reassuring. It reminded her she was going the right way. That if she didn’t give up, eventually she would make it.




CHAPTER TWO


WOMEN WERE an inherent pain in the ass, Nick thought as he grabbed four bottles of water from the refrigerator in the mudroom. Aaron followed him back outside.

“What are you doing? Where’s Izzy? You haven’t lost her already, have you?”

Nick jerked his head to the right and kept on walking. “She took off.”

“What?” Aaron took a half hop to keep up. “She’s blind. She can’t just take off.”

“She did.”

“What did you say? I know this is your fault. You said something mean, didn’t you?”

“No.”

“Then why didn’t you stop her? She could get lost out there.”

There was a slight possibility, but Nick doubted it. He’d given her a thirty-minute head start, so she could walk off some of her mad. He didn’t want to find her for at least an hour, maybe longer. She needed time to think through her options.

“She’s in the dry riverbed. She’ll walk along it because it’s the easiest footing.”

Aaron trailed him into the barn. “What if there’s a flash flood?”

Nick handed him the water and went to get his horse. “You see any clouds in the sky?”

“Okay, but what about snakes? Or she could fall.”

“I’m willing to risk it.”

“Is she?”

“Apparently. She’s the one who took off.” He led his horse out of the stall.

“She’s scared. Jesus, Nick, the girl has been blind all of fifteen minutes. Give her a break.”

“She’ll have to earn that.”

Aaron put the water on a worn stubby table, then planted his hands on his hips. “Sometimes you’re a big pain in my ass.”

“You think?”

Aaron pressed his lips together. Nick’s assistant was about five-ten, thin, with styled dark hair and a fussiness about him Nick had learned to accept. No matter how many pairs of jeans he wore, he never looked as if he totally fit in. He would always be a city boy trapped in rural Texas.

Nick accepted that, as well. Aaron was damned good at his job and loyal. But he had a way of burrowing in a topic like a tick during rainy season.

“She’s a nice girl,” Aaron said. “She’s out of her element. As far as she’s concerned, her family just rejected her. Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”

Nick finished with the saddle. He grabbed the water and stuck it into the saddlebags. “She’s here so we can help her. That’s what matters. She’s upset. She’ll walk it off and then be easier to handle.”

“She’s not an upset cow. She’s a person.”

“You’re taking this too much to heart.”

“Someone has to. Give her a break.”

“I’m rescuing her. Isn’t that enough?”

“No. She’s nice. You need nice in your life.”

Nick led his horse outside. Before mounting, he glared at Aaron. “Whatever you’re thinking, stop it right this second. You hear me?”

Aaron grinned. “She’s pretty, too. I know you saw that. I’m not into women and even I was impressed.”

“She’s a client, nothing more.”

Aaron rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. You think anyone believes that?”

“I don’t care what you believe.” Izzy was here because he was going to help her. For no other reason. He didn’t get involved, certainly not with someone on his ranch. The last thing he wanted was to be responsible for someone else’s emotions.

“Did you see her butt?” Aaron asked, as Nick swung into the saddle. “It’s perfect. Do you think she does squats? My butt is just so flat.”

All Nick wanted was a nice, quiet life. Instead he had this.

“I’m leaving now,” he said.

“Okay, but be gentle when you find her. She’ll be upset and she might have a little heatstroke. Maybe you’ll have to do mouth-to-mouth.”

Nick turned his horse toward the riverbed. “Don’t you have work to do?”

“Yes, but this is better.”

“Say goodbye, Aaron.”

“Goodbye, Aaron.”

Nick adjusted his hat. The temperature had to be over a hundred. He glanced at his watch and calculated how long Izzy had been gone. He would get close enough to see her, but not so close that she would hear the horse. Then he would watch her to see how she was doing.

It took twenty minutes to catch up with her, which surprised him. She’d gone farther than he’d expected. Despite her month of shutting herself in her room, she was still in decent shape.

He reined in his horse and watched her walking. Involuntarily his gaze fell to her rear and he saw that Aaron was right—she did have a great ass. That combined with her wide hazel eyes, her long, dark, curly hair made her the stuff of fantasies. Not that he would be acting on any he might have.

He would do his best to fix her, not only because his friend Garth had especially requested that he take her on, but because that’s what he did. Fix the broken, then move on. Sort of like a reverse body count. Because if the numbers were high enough—if he did enough good—maybe he could finally let go of the past.



IZZY PUT ONE FOOT in front of the other. The sun beat down unmercifully, burning her exposed skin. Sweat poured down her face and her clothes stuck to her. Her mouth was dry, her head ached and if there had been an extra drop of moisture left in her body, she would have actually considered crying.

As it was, she argued furiously with herself. Going back made the most sense. She should just turn around and walk into the sun. That would get her to the barn. But it felt too much like giving up.

Nick would come for her. Or send someone. She knew in her head, he wasn’t going to let her die out here. Except if she kept walking, she might get so lost, no one could find her and then what? Did she really want to risk it?

“I don’t want this,” she said aloud. “Any of it.”

Not being outside right now, not being at the ranch or being blind.

“Why did it happen to me?”

She wanted to scream at the unfairness of it all. Only that would take too much effort.

She stumbled on something she couldn’t see, then caught herself. As she straightened, she heard a sound behind her. Fear tightened her chest, then she recognized the steady steps of a horse. She drew in a breath and stopped.

“You’re probably feeling stupid about now,” Nick said casually.

She raised her chin. “Not at all.”

“Then more than your eyesight got damaged in that explosion. Are you finished making your point or do you want to keep walking? In another twenty minutes, your sunburn is going to blister. That’ll hurt.”

“Is this your way of convincing me to accept your help?”

“You don’t need convincing. I’ll give you this. You’re the first blind person I know who would willingly walk into the wilderness with no idea of where she was going. I can’t decide if that makes you brave or an idiot. I’ll get back to you on that.”

“Don’t bother. I was fine.”

“You were lucky. You could have fallen and cracked open your head or been bitten by a snake.”

“I would have preferred a snake to you.”

She heard him get off his saddle.

“Now you’re just talking sweet to make me like you,” Nick said. “Here.”

He handed her a bottle of water. She took it and un-screwed the top. The liquid was cool and sweet on her dry throat.

“I wouldn’t drink too much of that all at once,” he told her.

She ignored him and kept drinking. She finally stopped, took a step, then bent over and threw it all up. Her insides twisted, forcing her to retch and gag. She coughed and did her best to catch her breath.

“Not the brightest bulb,” he murmured.

“Shut up,” she said with a gasp.

“Drink it slow and this time it’ll stay down.”

Humiliation joined the heat of the sunburn. She sipped cautiously.

“See?”

He sounded smug, which made her want to hit him. But she’d already tried that and it hadn’t worked at all.

“Come on,” he said. “Let’s get you back.” He took her free hand and led her over to his horse. “I’ll get on and pull you up behind me.”

“Or you could walk and I’ll ride.”

“Do you think that will happen?”

She saw blurry movement, then heard him settle in the saddle.

“Give me the water,” he said.

She passed it up to him, then found the stirrup with her hands and put her left foot in it. He grabbed her arm.

“One, two, three.”

On three, he pulled her as she pushed off the ground. For a second, there was an uncomfortable sensation of moving through nothing, then she settled behind his saddle, on the horse’s rump. He pressed her bottle of water into her hand.

“Hang on,” he told her.

“I’ll be fine.”

“Do you have to argue about everything?”

“Yes. It’s one of my best qualities.” As she spoke, she reached around his waist to hold on. If she didn’t, she would slide off and it was a long way to the ground.

The horse moved forward.

Sitting on the back of a horse was a lot different from sitting in a saddle. Instinctively Izzy held on with her thighs and tightened her grip on Nick’s waist. She rocked with the movement and found her nose pressed against his back.

He was warm and his shirt still smelled like soap and fabric softener. Underneath that was the scent of male skin. Her fingers encountered nothing but muscles at his midsection. She might not know much about the guy, but based on how he’d swung her over his shoulder, and rode a horse, she would guess he worked out.

Under other circumstances, and assuming she could see, he might be someone she found attractive. Not that it mattered anymore. Did the blind girl ever get the guy? Did it matter? She was hungry and tired and her skin burned from the sun. She just wanted to go home.

Except she didn’t technically have a home anymore. Her quarters on the oil rig had disappeared in the explosion. When she was off work, she stayed with her sister Skye at Glory’s Gate, but Skye wasn’t there anymore. She’d moved in with her fiancé. And Izzy wasn’t comfortable living in the family house with just her dad, mostly because she didn’t think she actually belonged there.

Thoughts for another day, she told herself.

A large shape came into blurry view. She squinted, but that didn’t help.

“We’re back?” she asked.

“Yes. I’ll help you down.”

“I’m good.”

She held out the water until he took it, then pressed her hands between her thighs, on the back of the horse, swung her right leg around and lowered herself to the ground. She hit a couple of inches after she’d expected to but didn’t stumble.

Nick dismounted and handed the horse to someone. She tried to see who it was, but couldn’t.

“This way,” he said.

Dinner, she thought longingly. She would kill for a meal. Or even act nice. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been so hungry.

But the building they approached didn’t look like the house. She couldn’t see the details but the shape was all wrong. He opened a door, then waited, maybe for her to go first. There was no way she was stepping into that pit of darkness.

Seconds later he reached past her and flipped on lights. She saw a big bright room, but no details. Cautiously, she walked inside.

The ceiling was a long distance up—she couldn’t say how far. The floor was hardwood. She saw shapes she didn’t recognize. The place was familiar, although she couldn’t say why.

“Where are we?” she asked.

“The gym. I heard you’re into rock climbing. I thought we’d take a few minutes before dinner so you can practice.”

She spun toward his voice. “Are you insane?”

“There have been rumors, but technically, no.”

“What’s wrong with you? I’m thirsty, sunburned, tired and hungry. I’m not climbing a wall just to amuse you.”

“Sure you are. Besides, isn’t there a part of you that wonders if you still can?”

She could accept a lot, but not that he was having fun at her expense. The bastard. She’d been right—Nick was a bully.

“I’m blind!” she screamed. “I can’t see.”

“You don’t climb with your eyes. You climb with your hands and your feet. Come on, Izzy. Once to the top. Think of how it will feel.”

Terrifying, she thought, angry and scared and hating life. It would feel terrifying. To be all the way up there, in darkness, or near darkness.

“I can’t.”

He jingled something that sounded like a harness.

“You can and you’ll feel better if you do. You’ll feel like there’s hope.”

“Are you talking? I can’t really hear you. There’s a lot of static.”

“Ignore me if you want, but I’m right. Come on. One quick climb to the top, then we’ll have dinner.”

She was so weary. Exhaustion hung on her, pulling her toward the ground. She just wanted to curl up and whimper.

“Can I kick you in the balls if I make it?” she asked.

“No, but you can have dinner.”

Her sisters had done this to her, she thought bitterly. Turned her over to this stranger who got his rocks off by bullying those around him. Resentment built up inside her. It burned hot and bright, until she could only think of pounding him into the ground. Of frightening him and making him whimper.

But that wasn’t going to happen. Not anytime soon. She was trapped and there seemed to be only one way out.

She grabbed the harness. The shape was familiar in her hands and she slid into it easily.

“The shoes are over here.”

She pulled off her sandals, not caring that her feet were probably filthy, and slipped on the climbing shoes, then allowed him to guide her to the wall. He offered her chalk for her hands.

She rubbed her fingers together. The room was cool and quiet. She could hear herself breathing and nothing else. Her skin burned from the sun, her body ached and she was so hungry she felt hollow. But none of that mattered. Not knowing where the need came from, she suddenly knew she had to climb the wall.

She closed her eyes, because then not seeing felt like a choice. She put her hand on the smooth surface in front of her, then felt around until she found handholds. When she’d gripped them, she moved her right foot forward and up. Nick moved behind her and clipped the safety line to her harness.

She ignored him. There was only the wall in front of her and finding the next place to hang on.

Slowly, she climbed. She found her rhythm in the movements. He was right—she didn’t need to see to do this and each step gave her more confidence.

About twenty minutes into the climb, she moved her foot higher, found the foothold and shifted her weight. Her foot slipped. Suddenly she was hanging in midair, with no idea of where she was or what came next. Panic surged, but she ignored it. She hung on with her hands, scrambling with her feet until she found another hold. Cautiously, she centered herself on it, easing her weight off her hands and onto her legs again.

Her heart pounded in her chest. Sweat soaked her. She kept her eyes closed. When she’d caught her breath, she began moving up again.

Nick watched Izzy’s careful progress. He’d wondered if she would refuse to climb, but she hadn’t. Now she worked her way steadily to the top of the wall, her body moving easily as she remembered what she was supposed to be doing.

His gaze slipped over her bare arms. Something inside him tightened when he caught sight of the curve of her breast. She was wild enough to be appealing but not so crazy that she made him wary. In other circumstances, before everything had changed, he would be interested. As it was—he could look but not touch.

She took the last few feet easily and slapped the top of the wall.

“I made it,” she yelled.

He reached for the safety rope and lowered her to the ground.

“Next time you can take it at more than a crawl,” he told her.

She touched the floor and unhooked herself, then grinned at him. “Next time we’ll race and I’ll so kick your ass.”

“In your dreams.”

She laughed. “No, Nick. In yours.”



BY THE TIME they returned to the main house, Izzy was hungry enough to eat a water buffalo. Or at least pretty much anything that was served for dinner. At this point, she would even consider one of her sister Lexi’s über-healthy sticks and greens sandwiches on the pressed cardboard she called bread. But when they walked into the kitchen, the smells that surrounded her were rich and thick and filled with promise.

“Over here,” Nick said, guiding her to the sink in the mudroom.

She found the taps, then the soap. After washing her hands, she splashed water on her face and dried herself with a towel. She turned toward the sound of footsteps.

“You’re back,” Aaron said happily. “I was worried. I know, I know. I shouldn’t. It gives me wrinkles. So we’re having pot roast for dinner. And, honey, the things Norma can do with a pot roast will make you want to weep.”

Aaron linked arms with her and led her into the kitchen. “Norma, this is Izzy. Izzy, Norma, who keeps us all fed and happy.”

“Hi,” Izzy said, feeling a little awkward as she stared at a blurry shape that was probably Norma. Should she hold out her hand? Wave?

“You’re skinny,” Norma said by way of greeting. “You sit at my table, you eat food.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Izzy murmured. “I’m actually a big eater.”

“Uh-huh. We’ll see about that. Now you go sit. I don’t have time for chitchat. Shoo.”

Aaron guided her toward the table. She reached out her hands until she felt the chair. She could make out the shape of the table and knew there were things on top of it, but couldn’t say exactly what everything was. Aaron took the chair on her right and when a man moved across from her, she assumed it was Nick.

Cozy, she thought, feeling awkward. She wasn’t used to eating in front of strangers. She wished she could take a tray to her room, but had a feeling she knew what would happen if she asked.

Norma put serving bowls on the table. “Eat up,” she said sternly. “I don’t want to hear anything but lips smacking.”

“We’re not allowed to talk?” Izzy asked in a whisper.

“We can talk,” Aaron told her. “She just sounds tough. Want me to serve you?”

“Okay.”

“There’s pot roast and potatoes and carrots. Plus biscuits. Norma, you’re killing me with your biscuits. They’re delicious.”

“I make them because you like them.” Her voice came from behind them, in the kitchen.

He dished out food as he spoke, filling her plate. “Wineglass is on your right. Tonight it’s a saucy little Washington Syrah from Walla Walla. I’m in charge of the wine selection. It’s a hobby of mine.”

Izzy glanced across the table. She could see Nick’s outline, but had no idea what he was doing. Eating? Staring? Reading the paper? He was silent, which unnerved her.

“Do you need me to tell you where the food is on your plate?” Aaron asked.

“No, thanks. I’m not that handicapped.”

“You’re not handicapped, you’re handicapable.”

His perky statement made her laugh. “Okay. If you say so.”

“I do.”

Izzy picked up her fork. Her mouth was watering before she took her first bite. She nearly swooned when she tasted Norma’s perfect pot roast. Her stomach growled again, this time in appreciation.

“You’ll meet Rita tomorrow,” Aaron said. “She’s in charge of the horses. She and her husband live a few miles away. They’ve been married forever.” He sighed. “It’s just so romantic. I want to find someone. Nick, you never introduce me to any of your friends. Why is that?”

“They’re not your type.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yeah, I do.”

There was something in his tone that made her look up. But no matter how hard she stared, she couldn’t bring him into focus. Or the room. Or her plate. Her appetite disappeared, leaving her feeling sick to her stomach.

“Izzy?” Aaron sounded concerned.

“I’m fine,” she whispered.

“Eat a biscuit. It’ll make you feel better.”

She knew he was only trying to help, but right now nothing was going to make her feel better. Nick was silent. The unfair advantage of everyone else being able to see made her want to lash out.

“You’re quiet,” she snapped. “Are you judging me or being critical?”

“I wasn’t thinking about you at all.”

She stiffened.

“Is that typical for you?” he asked. “Do you expect everything to be about you? You’re only happy when you’re the center of attention? No wonder you were comfortable sitting around, being taken care of. Least effort, most outcome. Being blind is probably the best thing that ever happened to you.”




CHAPTER THREE


HUMILIATION IMMOBILIZED Izzy. She wanted to bolt from the room, but couldn’t figure out which way to go. The last thing she wanted was to trip or run into something.

The unfairness of Nick’s words twisted inside her. If she could have been sure of her aim, she would have thrown her plate at him.

“I didn’t ask for this,” she said quietly. “Not the explosion or the consequences. But then it’s easy to be critical of me—after all, there’s nothing wrong with you, is there?”

Instead of another sarcastic reply, she heard the distinct sound of a slap.

“Hey,” Nick grumbled.

“Norma hit him on the back of the head,” Aaron whispered.

“Go, Norma,” Izzy murmured.

“Don’t be rude,” the other woman said.

“Don’t push me,” Nick told her.

“Like I’m afraid of you.”

Izzy heard footsteps retreating to the kitchen.

Aaron cleared his throat. “Nick isn’t actually a horrible person.”

“Really?” Izzy asked. “Could have fooled me.”

“I don’t need you defending me,” Nick said at the same time.

“Yes, you do,” Aaron snapped. “Look, Izzy, he needs to test your boundaries. Find out what kind of person you are. He sincerely wants to help.”

She looked at the blur across the table. “What does he do for the people he doesn’t want to help? Throw them off the side of a building?”

There was only silence.

“Izzy,” Aaron said, sounding frustrated, “being sympathetic doesn’t always work. But this is done with love.”

“Really?” she asked, both annoyed and embarrassed. “This is love?”

“Absolutely,” Aaron told her.

“Do you always talk for him?”

“Someone has to and I’m good at it.”

Nick continued to keep quiet, which was seriously irritating. Didn’t he get that she was at a disadvantage here? But he wouldn’t care about that. Somehow he would make this all her fault.

She picked at her dinner, not eating very much and not caring that Norma would take her to task for it. But when the meal was over, the other woman didn’t say anything as she cleared plates.

The second Aaron pushed back her chair, she was on her feet.

“I’ll walk you to your room,” he said.

“Thank you.”

“I’ll do it,” Nick said.

“You don’t have to,” she told him.

“I know.”

Aaron faded away. One second he was standing next to her, the next, he was gone. Izzy sucked in a breath. Just a few more minutes, she told herself. Then she would be in her room and by herself.

The blur that was Nick started walking. Izzy went after him, remembering about the step just in time to avoid tripping again. Halfway through the big living room, he stopped and turned. She assumed it was to face her.

“I’m not trying to hurt you,” he said.

She pressed her lips together and didn’t respond.

“Everything is different now,” he continued. “Whatever you were before, whoever you were, it’s all gone. This is your reality. If you won’t have the surgery, then you’ll have to learn to be blind.”

“Neither is your problem.”

“It became mine the second your sisters called me. You’re here, Izzy, and you’re not going anywhere. You can get through easy or you can get through hard, but you will get through.”

Annoyance turned to anger. Who the hell did he think he was? “Gee, coach, when we win the big game will we all go out for ice cream sundaes?”

“Nice attitude.”

“You like it? There’s plenty more.” She could feel him staring at her.

“What you don’t seem to understand is that your way of getting by, of getting things done, is over. You’re going to have to learn to be a different person. Tougher. Stronger. Whatever you were before doesn’t exist. Maybe you liked yourself, maybe you didn’t, it’s irrelevant now.”

“The psychology is interesting,” she snapped, “considering the fact that you’ve known me all of fifteen seconds. Where do you get off with all this? You’re just some guy who enjoys picking on those who are weaker. That must make you really proud.”

“That’s your first mistake,” he said quietly. “Assuming you’re weaker. As long as you’re weak, you can never win.”

“Oh, right. So that’s the big plan? Break me so you can build me up again? That is not going to happen. You’re not going to win and you’re not going to make me grateful for the process.”

“Then we have a problem.”

“I’m glad you’re finally figuring that out.” She pushed past him and started toward what she hoped were the stairs.

“You have it all,” he called after her. “You’re young, healthy. You have financial resources and a family who loves you. But that’s not enough.”

She paused and turned toward him. “I know. I want to see, too. How ridiculous is that?”

“All that stands between you and what you want is surgery.”

Surgery that could leave her permanently blind, she thought bitterly. But no one wanted to talk about that. No one wanted to deal with the risks. Because for them, there weren’t any.

“Have the surgery, Izzy,” she said in a sharp voice. “Just do it, Izzy. Why not? There’s no downside for you or anyone but me, right? When you have something to lose, we’ll talk. Until then, go to hell. I’m not playing your game. I’m not even interested in your game. I’m going upstairs to my room, that I will find on my own. You’re not going to win this one, and the sooner you accept that, the easier it will be for everyone.”

She turned back to the stairs and grabbed the railing. After fumbling for the first step, she got her foot on it and climbed until she reached the landing. She had no idea if Nick was watching her or if he’d already left the room, nor did she care. She was pissed and tired and sore and still thirsty. Her shoulders, arms and back burned from her time in the sun. Worse, she was completely alone. The two people she’d loved and trusted more than anyone had abandoned her and she would never forgive either of them.

She squinted, trying to bring the long hallway into focus. When that didn’t work, she had a second of sweat-induced panic. How was she supposed to find her room? Then she remembered Nick telling her it was the first door on the left.

She took a step in that direction and held out her arm to help her judge the distance to the partially open door. She pushed it open as she went inside.

The sun had long since set, leaving the room in darkness. She ran her hands along the wall until she found a switch and flipped it. Lamps on either side of the bed came on.

The furniture was little more than blurry shapes. She identified them through their obvious placement in the room. The bed was easy—as was the dresser. She guessed the rectangular shape on the foot of the bed was her suitcase, packed by Lexi or Skye. No TV, which was fine. She couldn’t really see it anyway and listening wasn’t all that fun.

There were two other doors. One led to a closet, the other, a bathroom. She turned on the lights, then returned to the bedroom, where she fumbled with her suitcase zipper until she got it open.

She had no idea what had been packed, so there were no memories to help her figure out what clothes were there. The jeans she identified by touch. The same with the bikini panties, thongs and bras. But the T-shirts all looked similar. Was that one white or pale pink? Blue or green? In bright light she could see the difference, but two lamps on a nightstand weren’t enough for that.

She carried a makeup bag into the bathroom, then clipped her hip on the dresser on her return trip. The sharp pain made her cry out, then tears filled her eyes and she just wanted to crawl into a dark hole somewhere and be lost forever.

The fear returned. Fear of the darkness, of the unknown. Anger joined it. Anger that this had happened to her. It wasn’t right, wasn’t fair. She didn’t deserve to suffer. Now Lexi and Skye had dumped her with a guy they didn’t even know.

The sharp emotions bled away, leaving behind only despair. What was the point? She couldn’t win this battle. There was no reason to try.

She pushed the suitcase onto the floor and crawled onto the bed. There weren’t any tears. She’d cried herself empty for the past month. She curled up on her side, hurting on the inside from the feelings churning within her and on the outside from the sunburn. She closed her eyes, then quickly opened them to make sure the light was still there.

It was going to be a long night.

Some time later, maybe only a few minutes, maybe an hour, she heard a knock on her bedroom door.

Great. Because Nick wasn’t done being a total bastard.

“Go away,” she yelled.

The door opened.

“I couldn’t hear you,” Aaron said. “It was muffled, but it sounded like ‘come in,’ so I did.”

Izzy sat up. “Did he send you? I’m serious. You can just leave.”

“By he, I assume you mean Nick. No, he didn’t send me. I brought some aloe vera for your sunburn. Do you always throw your clothes on the floor? Won’t that make you trip later?”

His shape stiffened, then bent. She felt the weight of the suitcase on the bed.

“You’re nearly unpacked,” he said. “I’ll just finish up so we can put your suitcase away. How does that sound?”

He was annoyingly cheerful, but for some reason she couldn’t seem to snap at him. Maybe because Aaron was so obviously happy and caring. Maybe because he wasn’t her enemy in all this.

“I’ll put a pair of pj’s on the dresser here,” he said as he carried clothes across the room. “The drawer next to your panties and bras. Socks are right below. There are a few shirts to hang. Oh, this red one is nice. But you probably look best in green. It would bring out the color in your eyes. True hazel. So they can look blue or green, right? I have brown eyes. Bor-ring.” He sighed. “Okay, that’s everything. I’m going to zip up your suitcase and tuck it in the back of the closet.”

He disappeared into darkness, then reappeared. “That’s done. Now let’s take care of that sunburn. Pull off your tank top.”

She sat up and looked at him. “Excuse me?”

There was a snort, followed by, “I guess I have to tell you I’m rolling my eyes. Izzy, please. You’re sweet and I like you but, honey, I couldn’t be less interested. I want to put on the aloe. Now take off your shirt. Oh, we’ll need to pin up your hair. You have something in the bathroom?”

He disappeared again. Izzy didn’t know what to think, then decided she didn’t care. She pulled off her tank top.

Aaron returned. She knew because she heard him wince.

“That has got to hurt,” he said. “Ouch. If your skin blisters, we’ll need to get you to a doctor. Did you take anything? I’ll get you some aspirin. But first let’s get this on. I’ll be as gentle as I can.”

He handed her several clips. She twisted her long hair into a coil, then clipped it to her head. Aaron sat next to her on the bed.

“I’ll do your back first,” he said.

She turned away from him and felt the coolness of the gel, followed by the intense pain of his fingers rubbing her skin. She knew he was working carefully, but every stroke was agony.

“Arm,” he said, touching her left one.

She held it out.

“I know this is hard,” he said. “Being here, not knowing anyone. The thing is, Nick isn’t such a bad guy. He comes off as a little gruff, but you have to look past that.”

“I can’t look past anything.”

“Not literally. It’s a figure of speech. Honestly! I’m talking here. Nick is doing some real good.”

She didn’t want to hear about Nick at all, but liked Aaron. Which made being rude more difficult.

“We have corporate retreats,” he continued. “Management types come and explore the wilderness. We teach them how to swing from trees, start a fire with a couple of rocks. You know. Team-building stuff.”

“That’s hardly going to qualify your boss for sainthood.”

“It pays the bills,” he said as he tapped her other arm. “The real work is with kids who have been through something traumatic. A shooting. A violent crime. Parents fighting for years, then finally killing each other. They come here all shut down. It’s sad. We put them on the horses, take them outside. Show them how to climb a tree. It helps. That’s what he does. He helps fix them.”

She didn’t want to think about Nick being anything but the devil. “Which is great, but doesn’t have anything to do with me.”

“And it’s all about you, right?” Aaron asked, sounding amused. “Honey, you’ve got some attitude on you.”

“I know. It used to look good.”

“It still could. Now face me.” He rubbed the cool aloe on her chest. “You’re going to be peeling like a snake in a few days. Okay. I’ve done all I can. You’re going to have to sit like this until you dry off. Let me get the aspirin.”

He disappeared for a minute or so. Izzy sat there in her bra and jeans wondering if anyone was walking by the open door and enjoying the show. Did she care?

Aaron returned. “Aspirin and water. Because that’s just the kind of guy I am.”

She took both. “Why are you here? Why Nick? Why this place?”

“I’m a Texas kind of guy.”

“Uh-huh.”

“I could be. I try.” He hesitated. “I like it here. This is where I belong.”

She knew there was more to the story, but didn’t know what and she wasn’t interested enough to push.

“Thanks for your help.”

“You’re welcome. Now get some sleep.” He bent down and kissed her forehead. “I just love your hair. See you in the morning.”

Then he was gone.

She heard the door close, and the sense of being totally alone made her skin crawl.

She ignored it, the need to panic and every other emotion washing through her. After patting her arms to make sure the aloe had dried, she found the nightie he’d left on the dresser, slipped out of her jeans and bra, then pulled it over her head. She made her way back to bed and crawled between the sheets. She didn’t bother turning off the lights. It was better if they were on all the time. Anything was better than the dark.



NICK SAT IN HIS downstairs office, staring at his computer, but he didn’t see the words on the screen. Instead his attention kept shifting to the woman upstairs.

Izzy was in a bad place. All fear and attitude. Both could be channeled, used to get through. Or they could defeat her. Right now he couldn’t tell which way she was going to fall.

She wasn’t his usual type of client—he didn’t take on long-term care or individual cases. The corporate types came and went with forgettable ease. The kids…they came in groups of two or three, a weekend at a time. He’d once thought they should expand to week-long camps, but until they had the staff in place, that wasn’t possible. Besides, it was always easier if he didn’t get involved. If Izzy stayed, that was a risk. One he would have to control. He couldn’t be emotionally responsible for her…or anyone.

There was also the added challenge that she wasn’t a kid. She was a beautiful woman. He would have to be as blind as her not to notice that and coughing up his last breath not to be aware of the possibilities. Not that they mattered. She was off-limits.

So what happened now? Had he pushed her too hard? Would she rise to the challenge or snap in two? Sometimes the line between pushing and being a real bastard was hard to see. He tended to err on the side of being a bastard.

His phone rang.

“Hollister,” he said.

“How’s it going?”

“About the same,” he said, pleased to hear his friend’s voice. “With you?”

“Making a killing,” Garth Duncan joked. “It was a good day.”

Nick looked at his computer screen. “The market was down.”

“Not for me. Not for you, either. At least not your shares in my company. I can’t speak to what other crap you might have in your portfolio.”

Nick laughed. “I wouldn’t expect you to.” He glanced at the clock on the wall. It was nearly ten. “Still at the office?”

“Sure. I’ll head home in a few. Tomorrow I’ve got a charity dinner, so I’m getting things done tonight.”

Garth had been born to be a tycoon. They’d met on their first day in college, when fate had thrown them together as roommates. Garth had been a charming, good-looking eighteen-year-old who made friends easily and walked with the confidence of someone who knew he was destined for greatness. Nick had been a skinny, frightened fifteen-year-old scholarship student, in theory the smartest kid on campus, but clueless when it came to real life.

Garth had taken one look at him and left the room without saying a word. Nick hadn’t cared. He’d been grateful to be out of the horrors of foster care and in the relatively safe world of college. That relief had ended two weeks later when a few fraternity pledges decided that beating the shit out of him would secure their place in Greek Row history.

Garth had stopped them before they could do much more than bruise him. He’d dragged Nick back to their room and told him to stay out of trouble, then he’d left. By way of a thank-you, Nick had completed Garth’s calculus homework and left him a study cheat sheet.

Eventually, they became friends, drawn together by proximity and similar backgrounds. Nick had grown up without parents, Garth had grown up without a father. In the four years it took Garth to get his bachelor’s degree, Nick completed a bachelor’s in petroleum engineering, a master’s and most of his Ph. D. Garth taught him how to make friends and get girls. Nick got Garth through his classes with a respectable B-plus average.

That was a long time ago, Nick thought grimly. Back when everything had seemed possible.

“Your friend got here,” Nick said.

“Who?”

“Isadora Titan. Izzy. The one you told me about.”

Nick had taken on Izzy at Garth’s request. One of Garth’s former assistants had gone to work for Skye Titan and Garth had pushed her to suggest that they consult Nick. Garth had kept his name out of it, though. To hear him tell it, the Titans were his business competitors and he needed them in good shape so that they could continue to challenge him at work.

Nick knew better, though. Garth was one of the good guys—always had been. And he hated taking credit for anything nice, if only to preserve his reputation.

“So how’s she doing?” Garth asked.

“She’s having a tough adjustment.”

“I would imagine getting used to being blind takes time. You’ll work your magic. That’s what you do.”

“It’s not magic. It’s reality. She needs to get her head in the game. Otherwise she won’t have the surgery that could restore her sight.”

“Better you than me,” Garth told him. “I don’t have the patience.”

“Most days I don’t, either.”

“Still, you’re doing it. Thanks for that. I know you didn’t want to do this, but it’s important. Just don’t let them know she’s there because of me.”

“Your reputation as a ruthless bastard in business and life will stay as solid as ever,” Nick joked.

“A reputation based on reality,” Garth reminded him. “You see the new Car and Driver? What is it with those guys and BMW? As far as they’re concerned, the Germans can’t build a bad car.”

“Not everyone has a thing for old British cars that never run.”

“Not old,” Garth corrected. “Classic. There’s a difference.”

“Sure. It’s all a matter of how much money you want to sink into it. You can afford to have someone drive behind you with a tow truck. Most people can’t.”

“If you’d come to work for me instead of starting your own company, you could have your own tow truck driver, too,” Garth pointed out.

“No, thanks. I like my truck.”

“Typical Texan.”

“And proud of it. Go home. It’s late.”

“Yeah, I will. See you next time you’re in town?” Garth asked.

“Sure. I’ll call.”

Nick hung up and returned his attention to the computer.

So much had changed since that first meeting with Garth, he thought grimly. Too much. They’d shared a lot over the years. A lifetime. The one thing he’d never asked his friend was how well he slept at night. Had Garth conquered the past or did he, too, wake to the sound of the screams?



GARTH DUNCAN REPLACED the receiver and turned his chair so he could see the Dallas skyline. Lights beckoned from dozens of other offices, all several stories below his own. No one else had as high an office or perfect a view. He’d made sure of that.

It had taken a long time…nearly twenty years…but he was finally ready to destroy the Titans. Everything was in place. The lines were set. It was just a matter of reeling ’em in. Even Izzy had cooperated and become a player. That damned explosion.

Who would have thought fate would be on his side?

He knew the Titan sisters believed he was behind what had happened at the oil rig. But he wasn’t. His destruction of the Titan empire was subtle, untraceable. He wasn’t interested in bodies, he counted his victories in dollars and bragging rights. He wanted Jed Titan broken and shunned by the society he valued. If the Titan sisters lost everything along the way, better for him.

Who had arranged the explosion? The investigation wasn’t complete, but Garth was confident the authorities would find that the blast wasn’t an accident. Coincidences like that didn’t just happen. Someone had done it on purpose. To put the blame on him? Or was there another Titan enemy looking to hurt Jed’s family?

Either way, he would find out. And in the end, he would take everything from Jed Titan and not have a single regret.

Well, maybe one.

He hadn’t wanted to use Nick. But when Izzy had turned up blind, the opportunity had been too tempting to ignore. When Nick figured out he was being played, he wouldn’t be happy. Garth was counting on their years of friendship to see them through.

Besides, it was worth the risk. He had to win. Win at any price. Even the trust of the man who had once saved his life.




CHAPTER FOUR


IZZY SPENT a restless night. Her skin felt hot and two sizes too small. Her head ached and she was hungry. She got up while it was still dark and pulled the chair from the small desk toward the window. Eventually she saw light, then she could make out greenery and the barn in the distance. For someone who could actually see things, it was probably a great view.

She showered and got dressed, still not sure what she was going to do. While her sisters had probably thought there were no other options, Izzy refused to let them do this to her. It was her life—if she wanted to spend it doing nothing, that was up to her. They didn’t understand what she was going through. They didn’t know about the fear and hopelessness that haunted her. They had perfect lives, with great guys and a future that didn’t include being blind.

She wanted to go home, and as she didn’t know the way, she was going to have to outwait Nick Hollister.

Some time later, she heard footsteps in the hallway and braced herself. But a few seconds before the man entered, she realized it was Aaron and relaxed.

“Good morning, sunshine,” he called from the doorway. “Are you ready to start your day? Dear God, it’s a good thing you can’t see yourself in the mirror. You’re a lobster, girlfriend, and it’s not pretty.” He made a clucking sound. “You’ll heal, but don’t do that again. Do you need me to spell wrinkles? I don’t think so. Come on. I’m taking you to the barn.”

“No, thanks.”

“Now, Izzy. Don’t be difficult. It’s not unreasonable to do a little work. We all pitch in. It’s not like you can help me on the computer.”

Had it been Nick, she would have told him exactly what she was thinking. But Aaron had been nothing but nice to her.

“My sisters paid Nick to kidnap me. I don’t have to do work to make things even.”

“Fine, but what about your karma? It seems to me you need some good vibrations in your future. Come on. It’s nice out. You can meet Rita and she’ll make you laugh.”

His tone cajoled, which made her feel better enough to get to her feet.

“Look at you,” he crowed. “Walking and everything. Who’s a little trouper?”

She moved toward him. “Don’t make me kill you.”

Aaron laughed. “Now you sound like Nick.”

“I’ll have to watch that.”

“He’s not so bad.”

“He didn’t toss you over his shoulder and drag you away.”

“I know.” Aaron sounded sad. “My luck just isn’t that good. But maybe one day.”

That made her laugh.

They went outside. It was still early enough that the heat wasn’t oppressive.

The barn loomed large. Izzy didn’t want to go inside. All she could see was darkness. It was her nightmare come to life. Then something moved through the darkness and stepped into the morning sun. The something became a person.

“Izzy, this is Rita. Rita, Izzy. She’ll be staying with us for a while.”

“Nice to meet you,” Rita said, sounding pleasant enough. “I’ve heard you’re good with horses.”

“I know which end kicks.”

“Then you’re hired. We have a dozen horses here. For now you can start with giving them a bath and making them pretty.”

“I can’t wash a horse. I can’t see.”

“So what? They’re not expecting a spa treatment,” Rita told her. “Just a nice bath. You’ll do it by feel. Just make sure you rinse ’em good. Otherwise they’ll have skin trouble. Supplies are in this cabinet out here. Your hose is coiled on the left. Faucet where it should be. Bucket and soap below. Hoof pick and file on the top shelf. They’re all good horses. They’ll be patient. So let’s go get your first customer.”

Izzy was too shocked to speak. She was expected to wash horses? She couldn’t see what she was doing and Rita’s perky suggestion that she do it by feel was total crap.

“Are you coming or what?” Rita asked.

Izzy trailed after her. She hesitated before stepping into the barn, then winced at the darkness that swallowed her.

The overhead lights probably provided enough light for everyone else, but not for her. It was like being in a fun house at a carnival, but a scary one, with twists and turns and unknown shapes lurking just out of sight.

“Over here,” Rita called. “This is Jackson. He’s a good guy. How you feeling, handsome?” She pushed a rope into Izzy’s hands. “Here you go.”

Izzy reached toward the large shape and touched the horse’s neck. She stroked it a few times, then turned toward the rectangle of light in the distance. Jackson followed her. They walked outside.

She led him to the post by the cabinet and tied off the rope. Everything for washing him was where Rita had said it would be. But there were at least three different bottles. How was she supposed to know which one was soap and which was something else? She felt around for the brushes and hoof pick. The door swung into her arm and she dropped everything in the dirt. After fumbling around, she found the hoof pick again, but not one of the combs.

Izzy straightened and stared into the distance. Nothing was clear. No matter how she blinked or squinted, nothing came into focus. This was how it was always going to be.

She looked toward the horse, waiting patiently. She couldn’t wash him. She couldn’t do anything. Whatever Nick and her sisters thought, there wasn’t a miracle here. There wasn’t anything but frustration and defeat.

She walked over to a bench by the barn and sat down. Some time later, Rita found her.

“What are you doing?”

“Waiting until I can go home.”

“You’re supposed to be washing the horse.”

“Not today.”

Rita sighed. “I know you’re upset, but you have to trust us. We know what we’re doing.”

“I’m not a project. I’m not looking to be healed. I want to go home.”

Rita left. A few minutes later, the bell rang. Breakfast, Izzy thought, ignoring the grumbling in her stomach. She closed her eyes and imagined herself slipping into the warm water off an island somewhere. She could see the brightly colored fish, feel the whisper of the current on her skin.

Everything was beautiful. Everything was clear and colorful. All she had to do was reach out and touch whatever she wanted. She opened her eyes and stared at her blurry world. Not anymore, she thought grimly.

An hour or two later, Rita reappeared. “I don’t care who you are or what you’ve been through,” the other woman snapped. “But you left Jackson in the sun. Whatever you have going on in your life, we don’t tolerate cruelty to animals here. Get him inside now.”

Izzy hadn’t thought about the horse. Without saying anything, she got up and made her way back to him. “Sorry, Jackson,” she said and led him toward the barn.

It took her a few tries to locate his stall. He went inside. She followed him, using the walls to guide her in the darkness. After making sure he had plenty of water, she patted him in apology and then went back outside. She took her place on the bench and waited.

She had no idea of how much time had passed before Nick showed up. She sensed him before she saw his shape.

“You like to pout?” he asked.

“I want to go home.”

“Not an option.”

“Want to bet?”

Someone else joined him. Rita, she would guess.

“She’s not doing anything,” the other woman said.

“Not a surprise. She sat in front of a window all day for a month at home. Guess it’s not going to be different here.”

They were talking about her so that she would get angry, Izzy thought. If she showed emotion, any feelings, then they would know they were getting to her. It was the first step in her recovery. At least from their point of view.

“I don’t care what you think of me,” she said quietly, “I want to go home.”

She stood and walked toward the house. Once inside, she managed to find the stairs, then make her way into her room. She sat in the chair by the window and remembered what life had been like before. When it got dark, she lay down on the bed and closed her eyes. In the morning, she returned to the window. She didn’t eat or drink and no one came to see her. Izzy knew she would win. She no longer felt hungry or thirsty. She simply existed in an empty place where it didn’t matter that she couldn’t see.



“IT’S BEEN TWO DAYS,” Aaron said as he walked into Nick’s office. “She won’t talk to me or say anything and you know I’m very funny.”

“You’re the best,” Nick said, studying the proposal Aaron had put together.

“And you’re not listening,” Aaron told him, putting his hands on his hips. “She won’t leave her room. This is day three. How long can she go without food and water?”

He saved the file on his computer and leaned back in his chair. “She has a bathroom. She can get water.”

“She doesn’t look good. I think she’s catatonic or something.”

“You watch too many movies on Lifetime. She’s fine. She’s pouting until she gets her way.”

“I don’t want anything to happen to her,” Aaron told him as he took the seat across from his. “Nick, you have to do something.”

“I don’t know what,” he admitted, angry at Izzy for being difficult and at himself for failing. “She’s not a kid. She’s not excited to see a horse and able to forget her problems by taking a ride. This isn’t a new place for her. Barn kittens aren’t going to cut it. She’s angry and hurt and she needs a damn psychologist who can get inside her head.”

Except she wouldn’t talk to anyone. Her sisters had made that clear. She wouldn’t leave her room, participate in family functions. She wanted to…What? Stare out a window until she died?

There was life in her. He could feel it. And strength. But she’d given up. Once a person gave up, it was over. He’d learned that the hard way. He’d known that the second he gave up, they would win. But he’d had an enemy—death. Something to defeat, something to fight. And he’d had Garth. His friend had been his responsibility. Getting them both out had driven him to endure and ultimately to survive. What did Izzy have?

“If I could challenge her in some way,” he said, more to himself than Aaron. But how?

“Cards are out of the question,” Aaron said. “Maybe arm wrestling. Or have sex. You’re a heterosexual male. You know what to do.”

“It’s not that simple.”

Which was only half true. Izzy appealed to him. It would be that simple for him, although he doubted if she would appreciate him joining her in bed.

“Seduce her.”

“That’s not in the contract.”

“If you do it right, she shouldn’t complain.”

“Any other suggestions?”

“We could drag her into the woods and then help her find her way home.”

“Interesting plan,” Nick said. Would that give Izzy the will to push back. Or did she need something else? Something to hate. He’d had an enemy—did she need one, too? It was worth a try.

“I like her,” Aaron admitted. “I don’t want her to give up.”

“Me, either.”

“Can I take her food?”

“You already know the answer to that.”

Aaron sighed, then stood. “I always thought you could fix anyone. I hate being wrong.”

“Not as much as I do.”



IZZY LAY ON THE BED. She was bored and a little light-headed from lack of water. She hadn’t had anything to eat or drink in nearly seventy-two hours, but wasn’t actually hungry, which was weird. Sleep was easier, as was the passage of time. Everything blurred and her sunburn no longer hurt.

She almost didn’t care about not being able to see. Nothing mattered. Not even going home. She could just stay here forever.

She heard footsteps, but raising her head took more effort than was comfortable. She barely opened her eyes.

“You win.”

She recognized Nick’s voice. Even more interesting, she smelled something delicious. Something that made her sit up, even though the sudden movement made her head swim.

He put something on the dresser then walked over to the bed and grabbed her arm. He pulled her forward, then shoved all the pillows behind her back and let her go. She found herself propped up.

“You win,” he repeated. “I give up. I’ll call Lexi and Skye in the morning and tell them to come get you. You can go back to living in Lexi’s house. That’s what you want, right?”

She blinked, then remembered too late that wouldn’t bring him into focus. Her head felt fuzzy—almost like she was drunk.

“Why?” she asked, and was surprised that her voice sounded hoarse. Probably because she hadn’t spoken in three days.

“You don’t want to be here.”

“I didn’t want to be here before.”

There was movement. If she had to guess, it was a shrug. He handed her a large glass.

“Sip slowly,” he said. “It’s going to taste sweet, but you need to get it down. There’s water, but plenty of sugar, some herbs, electrolytes. It’ll help you feel better.”

She took a sip and nearly gagged on the too-sweet taste. Seconds later she felt like she was dying of thirst. Still, remembering her stroll into the wilds just outside the ranch and vomiting afterward, she continued to take small amounts.

He put a tray with stubby legs across her lap. She inhaled the mouthwatering scent of chicken and vegetables, not to mention fresh bread.

“Soup,” he said. “And one of Norma’s biscuits. Aaron will be by later. If you’ve kept all this down, he’ll give you a sandwich. Go easy on the food for the next couple of days.”

She wanted to dive into the soup and drink it while swimming around in the bowl. The image lightened her spirits, or maybe it was the sugar rush from the drink.

“See ya,” he said and turned to leave.

“Wait.” She cleared her throat. “That’s it?”

He faced her again. She couldn’t see his individual features, so she had to guess what he was thinking. If she had to pick an emotion, she would guess boredom.

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“This is as much as you’re doing? Seriously? What kind of crap is that?”

He leaned against the door frame. “You’re not interested in being helped. You’ve made that clear.”

“Not interested? This was the best you could do? I refuse to wash a horse and you’re finished? Is that what you do when those hurt kids come here? Do you even have any training for this kind of work? Are you certified? How much are my sisters paying you?”

“A lot less than they should have been.”

“How did they find you? The phone book?”

“I come highly recommended.”

“Oh, please. I doubt that. I’m not even a hard case. You didn’t make any effort.” Now that she thought about it, he’d done nothing, which really pissed her off. “One or two idiot pep talks and you’re through? A three-day hunger strike and you throw in the towel? Talk about all hat and no cattle.”

“What would you have wanted me to do, Izzy? Beg? I think this is all about being the center of attention. You need everyone running around, fussing over you. Then you’ll be happy. You probably won’t get the surgery because you like being the one everyone worries about.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” She wished her throat weren’t so raw so she could yell. How could he think something like that, let alone say it? “I’m not the one pretending to know what he’s doing. You’re nothing but a snake oil salesman. When my sisters find out about this, they’re going to investigate you. You’re going down.”

“You think I’m all talk? What about you? You’re just taking up space.”

She’d never actually hated anyone before. But now the feeling burned hot inside her. “Go to hell.”

“You’ve said that before. You need some new material. Maybe you can take your act on the road. The pity Izzy show. Not that you’ll sell many tickets. You’re okay to look at but once you break the skin, there’s nothing inside. To really be funny you have to be smart and have a world-view. You need to be likeable. None of those are your strengths. Still, you’re a Titan. You have money. You’ll survive. Maybe they’ll get you a nice room with a view. Not that you’ll see it.”

She wanted to throw something at him. She’d nearly finished the drink so she hurled the glass in his direction. It crashed into the door.

“Plastic,” he said, sounding pleased. “It didn’t break. See, Izzy. You can’t hurt me.”

And then he was gone.



IZZY HADN’T EXPECTED to sleep. She’d been so angry, so filled with rage, she’d spent the evening pacing in her room. When Aaron showed up with a sandwich, she’d eaten it because she wanted to be strong. She was going to leave this place, work out with some martial arts master, then break every bone in Nick’s body.

Maybe it was the pacing that exhausted her, or the hot energy of fury or the food in her belly. But sometime in the middle of the night she fell asleep. She only knew because she could suddenly see again.

She was back on the rig, walking down the hallway. There hadn’t been any warning. That’s what she remembered. The absence of a whisper of what was to come. One second she was heading to the mess for breakfast, the next she was in the middle of an explosion, flying through fire.

The brightness of it battled with the sound. She couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, could only be tossed around like a kite in the wind. Fire was everywhere. It licked at her skin. She felt sick and terrified and tried to scream, only she couldn’t and then—

“Shh. It’s all right.”

The voice called her back, as did strong arms pulling her upright. She sucked in a breath, then opened her eyes.

“It was just a dream,” Nick told her. “Make that a nightmare. You’re safe.”

Her whole body shook. She was covered in cold sweat and thought she might lose the sandwich she’d eaten earlier. No matter how she tried, she couldn’t seem to catch her breath. Her heart raced around in her chest until she wondered if she was having a heart attack.

The lights were on, but she still couldn’t see enough. She tried to get free, but he didn’t let her go.

“I know you’re scared. I know it’s real. It was the explosion, right? It’s a bitch to relive that. But you’re safe. You’re here on the ranch. I’m right here.”

Words that shouldn’t have comforted her, she thought, confused. Words he shouldn’t be saying. Still, his body was warm and solid and his arms felt secure enough to keep her from falling.

Gradually her breathing slowed, as did her heart rate.

He sat on her bed, holding her against him. One of his arms wrapped around her waist, as if anchoring her in place. With his free hand, he stroked her head, the side of her face and her arm, rubbing her like a cat. The contact should have been annoying, but it wasn’t. It made her feel safe.

She could feel the warmth of his chest against her cheek, the softness of his T-shirt. His heartbeat was steady and seemed to influence her own.

He drew back a little. “Lie down.”

Not knowing what else to do, she rolled away from him and stretched out under the covers. He moved behind her, pressing his body against hers, her back to his front, his arm around her waist. He found her hand and took it in his.

An intimate position, she thought. It should have been uncomfortable. It should have felt awkward. But all she could think was that he would protect her, no matter what.

“The dreams never go away,” he said, his voice rumbling in her ear. “They fade. You’ll go months without one, but then they’re back. Anything can trigger them.”

“Not comforting news.”

“It’s a fact, Izzy. They exist. They’ll always shake you. It’s not how you handle what comes in the night that’s important. It’s what you do the next morning. And the morning after that.”

“You read that somewhere?”

“I have some personal experience with nightmares.”

Somehow, that didn’t surprise her. “Want to talk about them?”

“No.”

“Typical guy.”

“That’s me.”

Her mouth curved into a smile. Then she remembered that he’d been a complete bastard and that she hated him so much that she was planning to learn how to beat the crap out of him. They shouldn’t be getting along.

But right now, with the heat from his body relaxing her and his arm around her like a shield, she couldn’t find it in herself to be angry anymore.

“How did you know I was having the dream?” she asked quietly. “Was I screaming?”

“Nothing that dramatic. I was checking the house before going to bed. You were restless.”

“You came into my room?”

“Yeah. Just like a stalker.”

“What about my right to privacy?”

“What about the pain you give me in my ass?”

That startled a laugh out of her. “I bug you?”

“I can’t describe how much.”

“Good.”

“Yeah. It’s good. Now go to sleep. I’ll stay right here.”

“The lights are on.”

“They won’t bother me.”

“Okay.” She closed her eyes and the fear returned. “It was the explosion. I was walking down an inside hallway. There wasn’t any warning. In the dream, I know it’s coming and I’m still caught off guard. Then I’m flying through the air. It’s so bright and loud. I can’t control what’s happening, I can’t scream or stop it. Then I’m falling into the fire and I wake up on fire.”

“No. You wake up safe. There’s no fire, Izzy.”

She turned toward him and stared intently at his face. Not that she could bring him into focus. “It feels like there’s fire.”

“I know.” He brushed her hair off her forehead. “If Aaron catches us like this, we’re going to have some explaining to do.”

The corners of her mouth twitched. “He’ll just be bitter because I got there first. He wants you.”

Nick winced. “Please don’t say that.”

“Can’t handle the pressure?”

“It’s late. Aren’t you getting tired? Don’t you want to close your eyes and go to sleep?”

It was late. “You can go. I don’t need you to stay.” The second he left, she would sit by the window because that would feel safer.

“Me? I’m not moving. I’m too comfortable.”

“Liar.”

“Not me. I always tell the truth. Ask anyone.”

She waited, but he didn’t move. Eventually, she put her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her. She was aware of his long, hard body next to hers, but that didn’t matter. Being safe was a whole lot more important than anything else.

“Go to sleep, Izzy. I’ll be right here. You won’t have any more bad dreams tonight.”

“Promise?”

“Yeah. I promise.”



IZZY WOKE to sunlight flooding her room. She stretched and rolled over, only to realize she was alone. Nick had left sometime in the night. Or maybe he’d waited until morning. Either way, he’d stayed with her until she’d relaxed enough to let go of the nightmare.

She got out of bed and crossed to the window. She was going home today. Back to live with Lexi, she supposed. To that window seat that had become her entire world. Back to waiting…for something that would never happen.

There was no miracle coming. No puff of magic that would make her see again. She either took the risk and had the surgery, or she had to learn to deal. Since getting out of the hospital, she’d been waiting for a gift from heaven.

“Get real,” she told herself. Heaven was busy with people a lot worse off than her. Nick was right. She had resources, a family, a life.

She showered and made her way to the barn. She had no idea what time it was, but didn’t bump into anyone else. She found the cupboard with the washing supplies and put everything on the bench next to it. She still had trouble deciding which bottle held the soap, then realized she could open them and figure it out by smell.

The barn was a little more daunting. She hit the light switch before entering, then tried to remember how far down she’d gone before.

“Jackson? Are you here, honey? Jackson?”

She heard a soft snort on her left and reached toward the sound. A horse dropped his head over the gate. She patted him.

“I have no idea who you are,” she said, “but you’re getting a bath. How does that sound?”

She led him outside and secured him to the post. Then she turned on the water and went to work.

Washing a horse was slow work to begin with. The animals were large and they had to be rinsed well. But doing everything by touch made the task that much longer. Izzy figured she got as much water on herself as on Jackson, but that was okay. She would get better with practice.

She’d just started rinsing the far side, when she heard someone say, “The breakfast bell rang ten minutes ago.”

She spun toward the sound and was rewarded with a yelp, followed by swearing. She turned the water off at the nozzle.

“Morning,” she said, trying not to grin. “Did I get you?”

“Yes,” Nick said through obviously clenched teeth. “Water’s cold.”

“I know. Sorry. You startled me.”

“Apparently. You coming in for breakfast?”

“As soon as I finish. Um, is this Jackson?”

“Uh-huh.”

She heard Nick brushing down his jeans. With luck, he was completely soaked.

“Okay. I’ll just be a couple of minutes.” She bit her lower lip.

Late yesterday afternoon, she’d been convinced she only wanted to go home. That there was nothing here on the ranch for her. Now she wasn’t so sure.

She wanted to stay. She wanted to try to…something. Adjust, maybe. But her Titan pride made it impossible to ask.

She stared at the shape that was Nick, not sure how to get her point across. “Nick, I…”

“Yeah. It’s fine. After breakfast, you can start on the other horses.”

“Okay.” She smiled. “Thanks.”

Then she turned on the hose and heard him yelp again.

“Dammit, Izzy. You’re going to make me regret having you around, aren’t you?”

She turned off the water and giggled. “Now why would you think that?”




CHAPTER FIVE


NICK STOOD in the kitchen and watched Izzy move through the living room. She walked deliberately, touching every piece of furniture as she made a full circuit. She completed the return trip in the opposite direction, then paused. A few seconds later, she walked into the center of the room and stopped. From there, she went first to the sofa, then back to the middle. She crossed to the window and returned to the center.

She was learning the room. By the time she was finished she would know where everything was and find it easily. In a couple of days she would be able to hurry through the house like everyone else.

Even as he watched her turn and pace and count, he was distracted by her long bare legs. Her shorts barely covered her butt and her tight T-shirt outlined her full breasts. Normally he would have been able to ignore her athletic body. Normally he could appreciate the show and move on. Normally he hadn’t spent a long, agonizing night lying next to a beautiful woman, her legs tangled with his, her head on his shoulder, her breasts nestling against his arm.

He told himself that the price was worth it. She’d proven her strength—not only in avoiding a crash and burn after her nightmare, but by being able to move on from their fight. He’d taunted her. She’d risen to the bait, but hadn’t gotten trapped in anger. She was strong and determined—someone he could admire. Now if only he could see her naked.

Stop it, he told himself. Izzy was a client, someone he was helping. He had no business thinking about kissing every inch of her, of touching her until she begged and then losing himself in her. It was unprofessional. It was sexist. And being hard all the time was damned unpleasant.

The point of all this was she hadn’t given up, which meant she was one step closer to having the surgery. There were more—

“You have some serious stalker tendencies,” she said, turning to face him. “It’s borderline creepy. You should go talk to someone about it.”

“I’ve been here ten minutes. Why did it take you so long to figure out you weren’t alone?”

She continued finding her way around the room. “My bat sonar isn’t fully installed just yet.”

“You need to work on that.”

“You need to get a life. Do you watch me in the shower?”

The image dropped into his brain and there was no way he could ignore it. “Do you want me to?”

She tilted her head slightly. Her long, dark, curly hair tumbled over her right shoulder. She walked toward him, stopping only inches away. A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth.

“You need a woman. Seriously. It’s bad enough that the blind girl can figure it out. That’s got to be embarrassing.”

It was, but he wouldn’t admit it to her. “I’m playing your game. That should make you happy.”

“Maybe. I take it you don’t have anyone you’re seeing right now. I’m guessing it’s a geographic thing. It’s hard to date when your life is in the middle of nowhere.”

“My work keeps my busy.”

“So you’re between relationships? Or are you the type who doesn’t get involved?”

Why were they talking about him? “I don’t get involved.” Why was he answering her questions?

Her eyes were hazel, the irises a kaleidoscope of color.

“So typical,” she said. “Were you burned by love? Did someone break your heart?”

“No.” No one got close enough to break anything. “What about you?” he asked. “Why aren’t there a pack of guys at your beck and call?”

“I prefer one-on-one to a pack,” she said. “I don’t do serious, either. It’s too much trouble. I like my men easy and pretty. Although I guess pretty is less important than it used to be.”

It was as if a light clicked off inside her. One second she was flirty and confident, the kind of woman who made men look even when they didn’t want to. The next, her shoulders slumped, her chin dropped and her energy faded.

She turned away, obviously lost in defeat.

He grabbed her arm. “Don’t,” he told her. “Don’t give in. You have to stay strong. It’s worth it.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yeah, I do.” He wanted to shake her until she figured out there was a process and she had to keep moving forward.

“Were you really going to let me go home?” she asked.

“You could have gone home.”

“You were a bastard on purpose. I suppose I should thank you.”

He would like it better if she were yelling or throwing things. Anger had power behind it. This acceptance would kill her…or at least keep her from getting well.

“Don’t thank me,” he said, frustrated. “Get pissed off. Yell at me. Hate me.”

“Why? You haven’t done anything wrong.”

“Sure I have.” He was a guy—there had to be something he’d done. “I think you’re an idiot for wasting the opportunities you’ve been given.”

“Like I’m buying that.” She pulled free and turned to leave.

“You’ve wasted your life. You’re a Titan. You could have done something with all that money, but you haven’t. You’re useless. Being blind just makes it obvious to everyone else. Because you’ve always known the truth.”

She turned back to him, her expression more annoyed than angry, but at least it was better than defeat.

“You have some serious psychological problems,” she told him. “I don’t think your geography has anything to do with why you’re not in a relationship. I think it’s you.”

“What’s your excuse for being alone? Since when are relationships too much trouble for a woman? It’s what you all live for.”

“You are seriously grasping here.”

“Whatever works.”

“What’s your end game?” she asked.

“For you not to give up.”

“And then what? Do I get a cookie?”

“You get your life back, Izzy. That has to be worth something.”

“According to you, it isn’t. I’m useless.”

“So be mad at me. Have something to prove.”

“You know, you need a strategy,” she told him. “Right now you’re just bouncing around from point to point. There’s no cohesive argument here.”

“I’m thinking on my feet.”

She smiled. “Not your greatest strength, huh?”

He relaxed a little. “I do okay.”

“The people who say that are your employees, aren’t they? You have to pay them a lot of money to get them on your side.”

“You’re saying I don’t inspire loyalty?”

“I’m saying you have issues.”

“So do you.”

“One or two.”

“Like not having the surgery.”

She poked him in the chest. “We are so not having that conversation.”

The fire was back. Good. As long as she stayed strong, she would make it.

“We have to have it sometime.”

“Not today.”

She looked at him. If he didn’t know better, he would swear she could see everything. Her eyes were so damn beautiful…just like the rest of her. Without thinking, he reached toward her and cupped the side of her face. Her skin was smooth and soft.

“You can’t hide from me forever,” Aaron said as he walked into the kitchen. “You can run but you can’t hide. I’ve always loved that saying. I have proposals that need your approval and a lot of other details you keep avoiding.”

Nick dropped his hand and Izzy took a step back. Aaron rounded the corner, then came to a stop.

“Oh, my,” he said, glancing between them. “You could cut the tension in this room with a knife. What have you two been up to? It’s bad. I can tell. I’m just going to back out and we can pretend I was never here.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Nick said. “I’m leaving.”

“But you’re the one I have to talk to.”

Izzy heard footsteps retreating. Based on the sound and cadence, she knew Nick was the one who had left.

“What did I miss?” Aaron asked, sounding intrigued. “You both looked guilty. There’s something going on between you two.”

“Not that much,” she said, thinking that last night had been about comfort. He’d kept her sane through a rocky couple of hours. But what had today been about?

“Honey, I know sexual tension when I see it and it was filling this room. Come have a seat and tell Uncle Aaron everything. Start at the beginning and talk slow. My love life sucks so I’ll have to live vicariously through yours.”

He took her hand and led her to the sofa. When they were seated, the cushion moved as if he were getting more comfortable or angling toward her.

“Tell me everything.”

“There’s nothing to tell. We were arguing.” Sort of. “Nick wants to make sure I don’t give up. Sometimes he’s a jerk about it.”

Aaron sighed. “Don’t you love it when he gets all manly. I know it makes my heart beat faster.”

She laughed. “I find him annoying.”

“I don’t think so. The way he was looking at you.”

“Really?”

“Uh-huh. Like he hasn’t eaten in three days and you’re the buffet.”

Something deep inside her belly quivered to life. “Nick is nice,” she said cautiously, aware she was at a serious disadvantage. She couldn’t tell what Nick was thinking by looking at him.

“Nice? He’s a lot more than that. Have you seen those muscles. Oh. Right. Probably not. Well, they’re there and they’re fabulous.”

She’d felt them when he’d dragged her out of Lexi’s house and again last night. He’d been strong and safe and, well, kind. Not exactly a word she would have expected to use where he was concerned.

“You’re not seeing anyone, are you?” Aaron asked. “I don’t want Nick hurt.”

“What? You should be worried about me. I can’t wear makeup or fuss with my hair. I have to shave my legs by feel, which is probably not pretty.”

“You’re beautiful and sexy and something tells me you’ve been fighting off the boys since you were thirteen. It’s not about makeup, Izzy, it’s about you. Nick is drool-worthy. Believe me, I know. But he keeps to himself. No one gets in, because he makes sure they don’t.”

The compliments made her feel good, but she was more interested in what Aaron hadn’t said.

“Why doesn’t he get involved?”

Aaron was silent.

She sighed. “If you’re making a face, I can’t see it.”

“Oh. Right. Sorry. He has a past. Most of it, I don’t know either. Some I’ve figured out. Some he’s told me. He was raised in foster care. I don’t know what happened to his parents. He’s smart. Scary smart. Went to college on a full scholarship when he was fifteen or sixteen. It’s never good to be the smartest kid in the room. Then he grew up and…” Aaron paused. “The next few years aren’t clear to me. Anyway, he ended up here with this ranch and his business.”

Talk about a lot of gaps, she thought, wondering how many were because Aaron really didn’t know and how many were because he didn’t want to tell her.

“Did he buy the ranch or was it in his family?” she asked.

“He bought it and fixed it up.”

“Specially for the corporate retreats?”

“Specifically for the kids. The corporate stuff happens to pay the bills.” The sofa shifted as Aaron stood. “Like I said, don’t hurt him.”

“As if I could. I’m not here to get the guy. I’m here to get better.”

Aaron said something and left, but she wasn’t paying attention. Until that second, she hadn’t been willing to admit the truth to herself. But there it was, at last. Her admission of something she’d been avoiding since she’d first found out she’d lost nearly all her sight. She wanted to get better. To heal. She didn’t know if that meant having the surgery or adjusting to what she had, but at least there was a goal.

It had been a long time since she wanted something. It felt good to have a purpose and maybe, just maybe, get it right.



“YOU’VE DONE THIS a thousand times,” Rita said calmly, as Izzy wrestled with getting the pad in the right spot.

“Jackson’s going to hate me pretty soon,” Izzy muttered, smoothing the pad in place. “Does this look right?”

“Don’t ask me,” Rita told her. “You’re the one saddling the horse.”

“You can be very frustrating,” Izzy told her, as she made a couple of adjustments. “Okay—that should be good.” She bent over to grab the saddle.

“I would appreciate a little cooperation,” she told the horse. “Just don’t step on me.”

“Jackson is too much a gentleman for that,” Rita said.

“I hope you’re right.”

She raised the saddle to what she hoped was the correct height and lowered it onto his back. When it was in place, she made sure the right stirrup was still hooked out of the way, then walked around him and checked the saddle placement by touch.

“This seems good,” she said quietly, patting Jackson as she went. She secured the saddle in place, grabbed it with both hands to make sure it was tight, then fumbled for the stirrup. “Now for the real test.”

She swung herself up into place. Except for the fact that she felt too far off the ground and dangerously vulnerable in a blurry world, it was good.

“I did it,” she said, oddly proud of herself.

“Yes, you did. Next time you’ll do it faster.”

“Why do I have visions of you holding a stopwatch?”

“I have no idea. I’m not the stopwatch type.”

Izzy removed the saddle and pad, putting both away before returning to Jackson’s side and offering him a piece of apple. “You were very good for me and I appreciate that.”

“Next we’ll get you exercising the horses,” Rita told her.

Izzy wasn’t too sure about that, but she would deal with that fight when it was time. For now she was getting through each day, making progress, albeit slowly. She was learning how to function. Sometimes she was pleased with her progress, other times she still wanted to scream at the heavens, complaining this shouldn’t have happened to her.

At least the nightmares hadn’t returned. Not since that night Nick had shown up and comforted her.

“Tell me about Nick,” she said.

“What do you want to know?”




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Сьюзен Мэллери

Тип: электронная книга

Жанр: Современные любовные романы

Язык: на английском языке

Издательство: HarperCollins

Дата публикации: 16.04.2024

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О книге: Izzy has always been the fearless Titan sister.But when an oil rig blows up, leaving her barely able to see, her sisters find themselves as concerned by her emotional withdrawal as by the possibility that the explosion was no accident.Are the mind games their long-lost brother Garth has been playing turning physical? Or is someone else out to get them? When her sisters enroll her in a survivor training camp, Izzy is not happy. Nick, her instructor, is determined that she won′t be left in the dark. In more ways than one.But if he tells her the terrible truth behind why he′s helping her, he′ll never see her again. Unless they′re both willing to take the biggest risk of all.

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