Filthy Beautiful Lust
Filthy Beautiful Lust
Kendall Ryan
***Warning – 18+ contains explicit sexual situations and language*** from the author of Filthy Beautiful Lies and Filthy Beautiful Love.‘Tell me what you need,’ I ask, lacing my fingers with hers. The simple act of holding her hand makes my blood pump faster.‘I need you to be careful with me and Max,’ she whispers.Pace Drake loves sex, and he makes no apology for getting what he wants, when he wants it. But when he meets, Kylie Sloan, he’s enthralled by her and begins to question his standard operating procedure. Kylie’s depth and determination make the hookups that fill his weekends seem empty and shallow. She doesn’t want or need anyone to take care of her and that only makes him want to care for her more.Kylie’s trust in men has vanished. The last man she was with played ding-dong-ditch-it with her uterus and now the infant son he left her to raise alone is the only man she has time for. Pace wants to prove to her that he is one of the good guys, but can she really trust that his days of hitting it and quitting it are gone forever?
Published by HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd
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www.harpercollins.co.uk (http://www.harpercollins.co.uk)
First published by Kendall Ryan Books 2014
First published in Great Britain by Harper 2015
Copyright © Kendall Ryan 2015
Cover layout design © HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd 2015
Cover photographs © Gallerystock
Kendall Ryan asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.
A catalogue copy of this book is available from the British Library.
This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
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Source ISBN: 9781502478276
Ebook Edition © February 2015 ISBN: 9780008133894
Version 2015-02-02
Praise for Filthy Beautiful Lies (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
‘Provocative and filthy…I. Love. This. Book.’ – Roxy Sloane, #1 bestselling erotica author
‘Every Kendall Ryan book should come with a fan and some batteries because they are that hot.’ – Lauren Blakely, New York Times & USA Today bestselling author
‘Compelling characters in a wicked hot story. Kendall Ryan is a goddess.’ – Lexi Ryan, New York Times & USA Today bestselling author
‘Intense, consuming, and ridiculously sexy…Kendall Ryan has outdone herself yet again.’ – Emma Hart, New York Times bestselling author
‘Sinfully enticing, sexually charged and lust driven! Filthy Beautiful Lies is Kendall Ryan at her devastatingly best.’ – Rachel Brookes, author of the bestselling Breathe series
Contents
Cover (#ub4c3d0f3-de41-533d-8427-e449af26bf66)
Title Page (#u94eeadb6-4c69-5cf3-bd7c-9905705f3c05)
Copyright (#uc7e66c46-059c-5673-a363-af20ba9c62ed)
Praise for Filthy Beautiful Lies (#uc4a2fd16-a396-54d8-a645-58f8594d76f6)
Chapter One (#ud4c1ca7f-bf97-582c-bb76-af594fc3334c)
Chapter Two (#udbed5d09-bfa8-50bd-b491-a53414c254ff)
Chapter Three (#u89ef8f45-63db-52c1-abcb-e79ebd11c0bd)
Chapter Four (#uaf7981ac-3fe5-57ef-8a2f-d54f4c009565)
Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)
KR Page Lies (#litres_trial_promo)
KR Page Love (#litres_trial_promo)
KR Page Forever (#litres_trial_promo)
KR Page When I Break (#litres_trial_promo)
About the Author (#litres_trial_promo)
Tell Me Your Favorite Part! (#litres_trial_promo)
Connect With Kendall Ryan: (#litres_trial_promo)
Also by Kendall Ryan (#litres_trial_promo)
W6 Book Cafe (#litres_trial_promo)
About the Publisher (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter One (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
Pace
The blonde on my arm is driving me nuts. If it weren’t for her giant fake tits, that I very much want to play with later, I would have ditched her at the door.
We’re at a fancy gala for Colton’s charity, and the five thousand dollar a plate dinner is designed to bring in the last of the donations needed to ensure the school and hospital he plans to open are fully funded in the years to come. It’s a great cause. But all I want to do is leave.
‘Pace,’ my date says, tugging on my tuxedo-clad elbow. ‘Which one is your brother again?’
The one that looks exactly fucking like me, I want to answer. Instead, I point straight ahead to where Colton is standing talking with a group of benefactors. ‘Right there in the center. That’s Colton. And his fiancée Sophie is beside him.’
We’ve been mistaken for twins numerous times. He’s three years older, but we share many similar features – tall stature, dark hair, deep blue eyes. The main difference – where Colton is hard edges and serious expressions – I’m friendly, open and relaxed. Life is too damn short to take so seriously. But apparently, grasping our similarities is beyond the capabilities of her three brain cells.
‘Are you going to introduce me?’ she asks.
She wants to meet my family? No. But rather than provide her with an answer she doesn’t want to hear, I choose that moment to take a swig of my bourbon and pretend I didn’t hear her.
I’d invited Sheena here tonight after meeting her at my health club. I didn’t want to come to Colton and Sophie’s big event alone and thought it might be nice to have someone to talk to over dinner. Unfortunately the only thing Sheena wanted to discuss was her recent enhancements and how the plastic surgeon convinced her to go to a bigger cup size and how she thought he only wanted to sleep with her.
Well no shit he wanted to fuck you sweetheart. Line forms to the left, gentlemen.
After enduring two hours with the date from hell, all I want to do is fuck her in my car, and drop her off at home. Classy, I know. But you try spending ten thousand dollars on dinner for the world’s most annoying date. I deserve a blow job at the very least.
Something tells me that on Monday I’ll be looking for a new health club…
I’ve changed gyms six times this year. The cancellation fees are killing me. Maybe it’s time to rethink my pick up strategy. Nah. There are lots of places in town with treadmills and free weights, and I have no problem switching clubs just to avoid running into my former hookups.
‘Let’s get you another champagne,’ I say, steering her toward the bar.
Once Sheena is situated on a bar stool, I slip away, making an excuse to use the men’s room. Instead I head straight for where Sophie and Kylie are talking across the room.
My brother’s fiancé, Sophie Evans, looks great tonight. Long silky dress, jewels at her throat and her hair is twisted up in some type of knot. She looks happy.
‘Hey, sis,’ I greet her with a kiss to the back of her hand.
I won’t treat her any differently after her sister’s passing, because I know she wouldn’t want it, but I do try to be sweet to her. After everything she’s been through, she didn’t break, and I’m so thankful. Colton needs a strong woman, and Sophie is the perfect complement to him. I don’t plan to settle down anytime soon, but one day I hope to find a girl as good as Sophie. I still think his story about how they met and why she’d moved in was bullshit, but it didn’t really matter. Colt was a lucky guy, and he knew it.
‘Hi, Pace.’ Sophie grins up at me.
Next I turn to Kylie, who I’ve been trying to figure out for the past several months. She works for my brother, running the office operations for his charity, and I’m pretty sure she’s responsible for tonight’s gala. She’s stunning – in a deep purple gown that flows beautifully over her curves, fiery auburn hair that falls in loose waves over her shoulders and brilliant green eyes that sparkle on mine. The way she watches me sends tingles shooting down my body, pulsing in my groin. My cock begins to swell. What the fuck? She’s exquisite and classy and put together. The complete fucking opposite of my date.
‘It’s a great event. Congratulations,’ I lift her hand to my mouth and whisper against the back of it while watching her eyes.
She flinches at the contact and tugs her hand back, but treats me to a kind smile. ‘Thank you, Pace.’ The tone of her warm voice wrapping around my name is fucking sinful. I want to hear her moan out my name when she climaxes, I want to see her green eyes darken with lust, and watch her completely come apart beneath me.
I know she’s a single mom, and I should just steer clear. She’s nothing like the women I typically date, but something about her hypnotizes me.
‘Where’s your date?’ Sophie asks.
‘I’m not sure,’ I lie. I can see her from the corner of my eye, she’s still at the bar and seems to be chatting it up with the bartender. Good. Maybe I can offload her on him tonight. I wouldn’t mind going home instead with the elegant and sophisticated beauty I see before me.
‘I was hoping to meet her,’ Sophie says.
Sophie doesn’t understand there’s a reason I’ve never introduced her to any of the women I’m seeing. They’re all temporary. And besides, I doubt they’d hit it off. Sophie’s interests go a little deeper than nail polish and handbags. My brother chose well.
‘Isn’t that the woman you were with?’ Kylie asks, pointing across the room.
I follow her gaze to Sheena.
Fuck.
Sheena is currently bent backwards over the top of the bar. Her tits are practically hanging out, and she’s letting the bartender pour shots of tequila down her throat.
Christ. This isn’t a college frat party. It’s an exclusive black-tie affair for millionaires and politicians and the nation’s leading entrepreneurs. We’re here for an important cause, not to get wasted and dance on the damn bar. But something tells me my date doesn’t get that.
I don’t often feel embarrassed, and shit, I love to cut loose and have fun as much as anyone, but this is not the time, nor the place. My face flushes slightly and I clench my jaw.
I like a woman who knows how to handle herself – someone poised and put together when she needs to be and freaky as hell in between the sheets. My eyes find Kylie’s and something tells me she’d be that kind of woman.
‘Yeah, Sheena’s fun,’ I say, clenching my fists in an attempt to hide my true feelings.
Kylie frowns. ‘I introduced myself to her earlier, and she said her name was Trina.’
‘Shit. Is it?’ I rub a hand through my hair. The look in her eyes tells me this is a piece of information I should have known.
Sophie excuses herself a moment later, and I’m thankful for the private moment with Kylie.
‘Can I get you something else to drink?’ I offer, tossing her a flirty grin.
Her answering smile is coy, guarded. ‘Shouldn’t you be getting back to your date?’
A quick look over my shoulder at Sheena, or Trina, or whoever the hell she is, tells me I have no desire to spend any more time with her. In contrast to the beautiful woman standing before me, my date is all but forgotten. I might have thought she was sexy before, but now, I’m seeing her more clearly. Her dress is too short and her breasts are too big, even for my sizeable hands, while Kylie, in comparison, is perfectly proportioned–soft and curvy–just like a woman should be. I wouldn’t mind devoting hours to exploring the valleys of her body. With my tongue. And my cock. The bastard throbs at the thought.
‘She looks pretty well taken care of right now,’ I remark.
The bartender is all but ignoring the other customers in his eagerness to talk to her. He can have her for all I care. Good luck, buddy.
Kylie sets down her empty wine glass on the tray of a passing waiter. ‘I’m actually not much of a drinker. A glass of wine or two is generally my limit.’
Good to know. I file that information away. Remembering her kid, I ask about him. ‘Where’s Max tonight?’
She smiles lightly as though thinking about her baby brightens her mood. I like that, and I don’t have a frigging clue why. ‘His nanny stayed late tonight. I’m sure he’s in bed by now.’
I still recall that day in the pool last summer when I’d taken the crying baby from her and entertained him all afternoon. I couldn’t even be sure why I’d done it. I suppose, looking back, she just looked like she could use a hand. I’ve never liked seeing a woman struggle. Although a damsel in distress, she is not. I get the sense she’s not the type to back down from a challenge and has enough strength and determination to succeed at just about anything she tried. A sexy quality, to be sure.
As we stand there, me sipping my bourbon, and Kylie grinning politely at the crowd, the silence between us grows. I feel like we have nothing in common, and I’m at a loss, trying to think of something to say, anything that will keep this beauty in my presence. There are so many things I want to know about her, but none of them are any of my goddamn business. How she tastes, what noises she makes when she comes. I also want to know how she ended up a single mother, and if Max’s dad is still in the picture. I tried asking Colton about it once, but he remained incredibly vague. The asshat. If there was a worst wingman award, it would go to my brother.
‘Have dinner with me this week,’ I say. It wasn’t what I’d been planning to say, but once the words leave my mouth, they feel right.
‘Pace, that’s sweet of you to ask, but I can’t…’ She pauses, like she wants to say more, but doesn’t. Her body language is all wrong too. Where women are normally vying to get closer, placing their hand on my bicep, or even brushing their breasts against my arm, Kylie stands straight and tall, like she wants to avoid physical contact at all costs.
‘Are you here with someone?’ I ask. It’s also absolutely none of my business, but I’d happily shell out ten grand just to find out if she’s fucking someone.
‘No,’ she confirms.
‘No boyfriend?’ I press further. I need to know what I’m up against.
‘There’s been no one since Max’s father,’ she says quietly.
My inner alpha male beats on his chest in triumph. ‘That’s quite a dry spell.’
‘Indeed,’ she murmurs.
‘It’s just dinner, Kylie. It’s not like I’m offering to step in and play daddy.’ I treat her to a playful, crooked smile, my dimple out in full force. I’ve heard it’s quite irresistible and that’s what I’m banking on.
‘That’s exactly why I can’t. I’m sorry.’
Fuck. Why am I such a fucking idiot?
‘Oh,’ I stammer, at a loss for words for the first damn time in my life. Christ. Grow a pair, Pace.
‘Besides, something tells me if you’re interested in a woman like that,’ Kylie tips her chin toward the bar where Sheena, or Trina, is making a spectacle of herself, ‘you can’t possibly be interested in a woman like me.’
Hold the fuck on. Now that’s where she’s wrong. ‘Why’s that?’ I ask, meeting her fiery green gaze. If she’s about to criticize herself, I will not hold back in proving to her how very wrong she is.
‘Pace,’ she admonishes. ‘Look at her. They look…inflatable.’
When I realize she’s not tearing herself down, but instead chastising my taste in women, I almost want to laugh. ‘A woman like that is good for only one thing and we both know it,’ I say.
She raises her eyebrows, waiting for me to explain.
‘One good fuck,’ I continue.
‘You’re crass.’ Her eyes light up, and her mouth twitches in an attempt not to smile.
‘I’m direct, and you like it.’
She shrugs. ‘At least you’re honest. That’s more than I can say for most men.’
‘Go out with me. One time, Kylie. What do you have to lose?’
I can practically see the wheels turning in her head, and for one brief, beautiful moment I think I might have a chance. ‘Bye Pace.’ She turns and walks away, her long legs carrying her across the room while my heart throbs.
Fuck.
‘Kylie, wait.’
She turns and tosses me a sexy wink. ‘Go have fun with Malibu Barbie.’
This is not over.
I play to win.
Chapter Two (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
Kylie
This is not my real life.
My real life is not evening gowns and silk panties and fancy dinners. It’s heating bottles up at two a.m., spit-up stains on my yoga pants and fishing Cheerios out from between my couch cushions. But it feels amazing to pretend, if only for a brief moment.
As I sit in the back of the limousine Colton insisted I take, I remove my earrings one at a time and drop them into my handbag. The twinkling city lights blur past as we cruise down the freeway, and my thoughts drift back to the gala. The event had turned out beautifully, even better than I could have expected. But of course it isn’t the details of the fundraiser occupying my brain. It’s a certain six-foot, two-inch, well-muscled slice of man named Pace Drake. My boss’s younger brother. And there is no way he’d be interested in the real me.
I chuckle to myself, remembering that he didn’t even know his date’s name. I should feel outraged that he all but ignored her in favor of paying me compliments and asking me out. Instead I’m strangely flattered. When a man as handsome as Pace paid you attention it felt wonderful. Especially for someone like me. He could have any woman he wanted. And for some strange reason he’d set his sights on me – with my post-pregnancy body that is still curvier than I would have liked.
But I’d shot him down, which I know is for the best. I have personal experience with men like him. They’re looking for no-strings sex. And considering the last guy I was with played ding-dong-ditch-it with my uterus, and left me with a baby to raise, I’m more than a teensy bit skeptical about men like him.
Max is the only man I have time for these days. And the only man I will give my heart to.
I can’t resist pulling out my iPhone to look at the pictures of Max. Just as I know I won’t be able to resist going into his room to listen to the sounds of him breathing and leaning down to his crib to smell his baby scent, even though I know there’s a chance it’ll wake him. But his chunky baby thighs and big round tummy are too much for this mama to resist.
It was actually quite sweet of Pace to ask about Max. Last summer, the first time I’d met Pace at Colton’s pool party, he carted a screaming, teething Max around all that afternoon, swimming with him in the pool and bouncing him in his big arms. Colton seemed to have no explanation for Pace’s sudden interest in the baby. I was convinced it was merely him taking pity on his brother’s employee. I was beyond stressed out when Max was cutting his first two teeth. And I’m sure I looked it.
As flattered as I am about his interest in me, I’m fine with being celibate and focusing on my career and being a mom. Well, that’s not entirely true. I do miss having a man in my life. I miss strong arms holding me close, the brush of a stubbled cheek on mine, the feeling of absolute security. When I’m ready to start a relationship again, it will be with a man who makes me feel safe. There is nothing safe about Pace Drake.
He’s as dangerous as they come. Young. Sexy. Wealthy. Carefree. The dark, hungry look in his eyes promised me hot, intense sex. I shiver, recalling the way my body responded under his watchful stare. Yes, I’m sure he’d be a wild beast in bed, probably with a giant cock to match his stamina, not that I will ever know such things.
As the limo driver pulls to a stop in front of my house, I push all the crazy thoughts from my head. Fantasies are nice, but it’s time to get back to my real life.
Chapter Three (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
Pace
I haven’t stopped thinking about her since Saturday night. No, not Malibu Barbie. I’d accepted her proffered blow job on the drive home – it was mediocre – and then dropped her off at her front door. I haven’t heard from her since. Which is just as well, because it’s Kylie I can’t seem to get out of my brain.
I had no doubt she saw straight through me because that sassy mouth of hers had called me out on the one-night stand. I know there’s no way we’d fit neatly into each other’s worlds, but I have to try.
When I arrive at Colton’s office just after lunchtime, I find him standing beside his assistant’s desk, flipping through a stack of documents.
‘Hey bro.’ I slap him on the back. ‘You have a minute for your favorite brother?’
He rises to his full height and frowns at me. ‘Do I have a choice?’
I roll my eyes. I know he doesn’t like being interrupted during the work day. But too damn bad. I’d helped him with his woman plenty of times. ‘No. Now come on.’
I let myself into his adjoining office and hear his footsteps behind me. I’m not usually one for midday drinks, but rather than sit down in one of the plush armchairs that provide the perfect view of the Los Angeles skyline, I head to his liquor cabinet. What the hell, I could use some loosening up. I’ve been wound as tight as a damn virgin since Kylie walked away from my invitation on Saturday night. Women didn’t refuse me, and so to say I’m thrown off my game is putting it mildly.
‘Want one?’ I ask, removing a glass and the bottle of pricey bourbon from the cabinet.
Colton shakes his head. ‘What’s going on, man? Everything okay?’
I take a sip of the liquor and immediately decide drinking is a bad idea. I’m already on edge and frustrated. The alcohol will only make me obsess more. Abandoning the glass, I sit down in a leather chair across from him and let out a heavy sigh. ‘Tell me about Kylie.’
His gaze narrows. ‘Fuck no. You and Kylie?’ He shakes his head, rising to his feet. ‘No. Abso-fucking-lutely not. If this is what you came here to talk to me about, you can leave now.’ He points to the door, his expression unwavering.
Goddamn. ‘You’re no fun.’ Changing my mind, I stride over to the cabinet, grab the glass and down the rest of the drink. It burns like a motherfucker on the way down, but it’ll do the trick, numbing whatever this weird sensation is inside my chest.
‘I’m serious, Pace. She’s a good girl. She doesn’t need to get tangled up in your…ways…’
‘My ways?’ Now I’m getting pissed. He’s saying I’m not good enough for her.
‘Hit it and quit it. Pump and dump. Whatever you want to call it, it’s not happening. Not with Kylie.’
‘I know that, asshole. I wanted to take her out – like legitimately take her out to dinner. Enjoy her company.’
He frowns at me again, that crease in his forehead deepening. ‘You’re telling me you don’t want to fuck her?’
‘Don’t be a dumbshit. Of course I want to fuck her. But I’m just saying that I wouldn’t hit it once and never call her again.’
‘What would you do, then? Move in? Marry her? Raise her son?’ he challenges.
‘I haven’t thought that fucking far ahead. Christ.’ Now I’m pacing the floor of his office and I have no idea why. This entire exchange is stressing me out. I came here hoping to get her number, and instead I’m getting grilled like a steak. He’s pulling the older brother card on me like he does so often. The dick.
‘And that’s exactly why I don’t want you messing around with her. You don’t have a plan. Kylie needs a man with a plan. Not one with an agenda that only includes getting his crank yanked.’
I sink down into the chair, hating this concerned sibling act he’s got down to a science.
‘Kylie needs someone ready for a serious relationship. That isn’t you, and this isn’t a good idea, and we both know it.’
‘Just like it wasn’t a good idea for you to marry the mega-bitch Stella. But you didn’t listen to me. You had to find out for yourself.’ His fists clench at his sides. He hates it when I bring up his ex. Too damn bad.
‘You didn’t forget about our engagement party this Saturday, did you?’
‘Of course not,’ I answer. I’d totally forgotten it was this weekend. Good thing Collins and I had already gone in on a gift. ‘Where’s it at again? The Beverly Hills Country Club?’ I smirk. His last engagement party was there.
Colton growls out an expletive, apparently not appreciating my sarcastic sense of humor. ‘No dipshit. Nothing fancy and over the top. This is Sophie, remember?’
Sophie. Of course I remember. She is nothing like his first wife, thank God. That evil bitch would have eaten your balls for breakfast if you weren’t careful. I cup my nuts, remembering her, and shudder.
‘It’s at the house. Six o’clock. We’re grilling and playing yard games,’ Colton finishes.
‘Will Kylie be there?’ I smirk.
‘Get the fuck out,’ he hisses, tossing his stapler at me on my way out the door. It hits the wall with a dull thud, and I know I’m back in the game.
On Saturday afternoon, I’m seated on the diving board, dangling my bare feet in the pool waiting for the party to begin. Sophie and Colton are standing in the backyard, greeting guests as they arrive, accepting congratulations and showing off her engagement ring. There’s still no sight of Kylie. As the days passed, I started to question why my focus was so singularly on this woman. But then I see her, and it all comes rushing back.
She’s wearing a white, gauzy sundress with sandals on her feet. Her hair is tied back into a simple ponytail. She’s stunning. There is something so natural and simple about her. I cannot look away. My eyes wander down her bare legs. They are toned and tanned nicely. I wonder if she’s a runner. Her hand is outstretched and a chubby baby toddles alongside her, holding on to her finger.
It’s been a while since I’ve seen the little guy – I didn’t realize he’d be walking now. I continue watching them from my perch on the diving board.
Kylie leads him over to the bride and groom-to-be, then lifts him into her arms, doling out hugs and well-wishes, though I’m not close enough to hear what is being said.
When I see Collins arrive with our dad, I hop off the diving board, the bottom cuffs of my khaki pants wet, and cross the patio.
‘Hey old man,’ I greet him with a thump on the back.
‘Pace Alexander.’ He grins at me and pulls me into a hug.
It’s been way too long since I’ve seen him. The Christmas before last, I think. I’m pretty sure he has a new, young girlfriend keeping him busy. He still works, but we’re all on him to retire. That way he could spend more time out here in LA with all of us. And I’m sure Colton and Sophie are going to start popping out kids soon enough.
‘What’s her name?’ I ask him.
‘Who?’
‘You look way too fit and happy. There’s gotta be a woman.’
He gives me a sly smile and looks from me, to Collins and back again. ‘I plead the fifth.’
‘Just tell me she’s older than me at least.’
‘How old are you again?’
‘Twenty-five,’ I say.
‘Don’t worry about it, son. Now point me in the direction of this lovely Sophie I’ve heard so much about.’
Collins and I lead him across the yard to meet his future daughter-in-law. Sophie wins my dad over instantly, which is really no surprise. She’s sweet, kind, down to earth and easy to get along with. As we chat and make small talk with the family my eyes keep straying to Kylie. She’s holding Max against her chest as they twirl around in the grass, his squeals of joy audible even from here. I get a strange look from Colton when he catches me watching them. I decide to go now, while he’s busy with Dad, and before he can interfere. The cock-blocking asshole.
Since Max is the only child here, and Colton’s home isn’t exactly kid-friendly, Kylie’s brought her own toys for him to play with. Smart. They’ve already littered the yard with trucks and balls in various sizes and colors.
When I get closer, Max is pushing a green tractor toward her with chubby outstretched hands.
‘Raising him up right, I see.’ I nod toward the John Deere tractor her son is driving.
She looks up at me and smirks. ‘I didn’t know you were familiar with anything outside of BMW and Mercedes.’
She’s called me out and she doesn’t even know it. I drive a BMW M3. ‘A man can still appreciate fine machinery.’ I sink to the ground on bended knees. ‘It’s all about the details. See?’ I lift up the secret hatch under the seat.
Max begins to clap as I drop a couple blades of grass into the hatch and close it once again. He’s delighted to sit here in the grass, opening and closing the new found secret compartment while I talk to the beautiful girl in front of me.
Kylie sinks to ground, and crosses her legs, since she’s in a dress. We sit in silence for a few minutes, just watching him play.
Her son doesn’t look like her. He must get his olive skin tone, and dark hair from his father. But his mannerisms are all her. The way he breaks into a wide smile and squeals with delight reminds me of her own bright smile and hearty laughter. The way he stands and surveys his surroundings with a curious expression is Kylie’s too. They’re both so calm and grounded and there’s something I like about that.
‘Do you want something to drink?’ Kylie does some type of sign-language to him as she speaks and a moment later, he repeats the move back to her. She hands him a blue plastic sippy cup from inside her bag. He brings it to his mouth and tilts his head so far back that he falls into the grass and just lays there, drinking like he’s been travelling through the desert and deprived of liquid. I crack a smile. While he lies there quietly, I take a moment to look at Kylie. To really look at her.
The sun brings out her hair’s reddish undertone. Her skin looks incredibly soft and her mouth is full and has a natural pout that women spend thousands to achieve via plastic surgery.
Her bare shoulders are delicate and tanned. Sticky fingers reach out for her, and she doesn’t hesitate, lifting him into her arms and letting him plaster her cheeks with wet kisses. I wouldn’t know what that felt like – to have a little body clinging to me and so happy just to be near me. Watching her interact with her baby, it’s hard to look away.
Max tosses down his juice cup and wanders from her lap to where I’m sitting. ‘Hi buddy,’ I say, meeting his intense stare. He’s silently watching me, but I can see the wheels turning in his little head. He’s trying to piece together who I am and what I’m doing. I like your mom, little dude, so be cool. Holding out my hand, I ask him if he can give me five and he does, smacking his sticky palm against mine with a squeal. Then he lunges toward me and begins climbing me like a tree.
‘Max, don’t do that…’ Kylie reaches for him, but I wave her off.
‘He’s fine. Unless you’re not okay with this?’
She opens, then closes her mouth, thinking it over. ‘No, it’s fine. He doesn’t often play with men, so I think this might be good for him. I’m just happy he’s not shy. I’ve been waiting for that stage to hit.’
I look down into giant bright blue eyes. ‘You’re not afraid of me, are you buddy?’
He squeals and slaps a chubby palm against my face. Okay then, that settles that.
I spend the next fifteen minutes flying him like an airplane around the yard, hunting for frogs in the garden and letting him dip his fingers into the pool while I hold onto him.
Kylie watches everything with a neutral expression that makes me wish I knew what she was thinking. And even though she mingles a bit and greets the other guests, her eyes are never far from us.
Once Max tires of me, he reaches for her. ‘Mumma,’ he says in a little gravelly voice.
I place him in her arms, my hands sliding against her bare shoulder as we make the exchange. Her skin is warm and petal soft and her eyes dart up to mine. ‘Thank you.’
‘Anytime,’ I say, sticking my hands into my pockets. Without that wiggly little body in my arms, they feel a bit useless just dangling there at my sides.
The photographer Colton and Sophie hired to capture the memories of their engagement party approaches. ‘Will you three get together for a picture?’
Kylie stiffens, and I see her mouth open like she’s about to refuse the photographer.
‘It’s just a photo,’ I remind her. She’s desperate to refuse anything that could be construed as intimate between us. ‘Please,’ I add.
Kylie settles Max on her hip so they’re both facing the camera and I toss my arm around her shoulder, hugging them both, and smile brightly at the photographer.
She takes a few shots and then lowers her camera. ‘What an adorable baby you two have.’
‘Oh, he’s not…’ I pause, mentally smacking myself. I’d been about to deny him as mine– and he’s not–but I suddenly realize that I wouldn’t mind people thinking he was. I wouldn’t mind someone assuming that this beautiful woman and her baby belong to me.
Kylie’s eyes flash to mine, wondering why I haven’t corrected the woman.
I shrug, lifting an eyebrow to tell her it’s okay. Her brow crinkles and she chews on her lower lip, but doesn’t say anything, instead turning her attention back to Max.
In the distance I see the caterers setting out platters of food at the long banquet table on the patio. ‘Shall we get something to eat?’
‘Sure,’ she says, then makes the sign for eat to Max, which he eagerly imitates.
Chapter Four (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
Kylie
Pace and I are seated at one of the banquet tables dressed in white linens with Max between us. I’m nervous he’s going to spill something or ruin the tablecloth with his enthusiastic method of eating, but Pace only smiles adoringly at him. It makes me feel unsure and on edge.
I share a plate of food with Max, and he nibbles on grilled salmon, potatoes and cucumber salad like a champ. I’m thankful I don’t have a picky eater. Otherwise, it’d be Cheerios for dinner, because that was all I packed. Of course I also forgot to put on his bib, which meant half of the food was ending up on his shirt. I’ll be changing him into his jammies after this.
Pace looks on, clearly impressed by Max’s ability to shovel fistfuls of food into his mouth. ‘Does he have any teeth in there?’
‘He has four.’
‘How old is he?’ he asks next.
I don’t know what’s up with his sudden interest in my child, or maybe it’s just that he’s trying to be polite and make small talk since he’s stuck sitting next to the lady with the baby. ‘He turned one last month.’
‘So it’s just you and him?’ The depth of Pace’s expression surprises me. There’s usually a crooked grin on his lips, a dimple peeking from one cheek, and a mischievous sparkle in his eyes. Now there’s only a set mouth, strong jawline and deep blue eyes watching me, waiting for my response.
I swallow a lump in my throat. I don’t need anyone. At least that’s what I tell myself. But Max… I feel bad for my son. I hate to think about when he’s older having to explain to him that his own father wanted nothing to do with him. ‘It’s just us,’ I say, my voice going tight. I take a sip of water and exhale deeply. ‘Where’s your girlfriend tonight?’
‘I don’t have a girlfriend.’
‘What about the blonde from the other weekend?’
‘She was a one-time thing.’
‘Classy.’ I raise an eyebrow at him. He’s blunt, but for some reason I like his direct style of communication and the way his eyes never stray from mine. He doesn’t make excuses, doesn’t try to cover up who he is. Or what that night had been – it was a one-time hookup. God, I don’t even remember what that’d be like.
I might be a mom now, but my body still has needs, yearnings…that I promptly ignore. Yes, sir, I shut those feelings down with a vice clamp. They are dangerous and make me want things that just aren’t possible for me right now.
‘I still want to take you to dinner,’ he says, reading my faraway thoughts.
‘We’re having dinner,’ I point out and feed another bite to Max from the end of my fork, hoping to actually get some of the food in his mouth this time.
Pace stares straight ahead, looking out at the ocean, and for the first time, I begin to wonder what he’s thinking, what he sees when he looks at me. He’s a handsome, eligible bachelor. Surely his prospects are better than a single mom so jaded it’d take a miracle for me to trust again. Though I have to admit, there is something in me that loved seeing him with Max. His big hands that curled all the way around Max’s belly and ribcage, the gentle way he flew him through the air while Max giggled…Max deserves more moments like that. The rational side of my brain knows that, but I won’t have him feel the loss and rejection when Pace decides a blond with inflatable breasts is more fun than a twenty-nine year old single mom and her son. And he was guaranteed to.
Men like him don’t change overnight. I need to keep my feet firmly on the ground and my head out of the clouds, no matter how freaking cute he is.
After dinner, I change Max into his pajamas, we brush all four of his teeth and I read him the two books I’d packed. I know he’s tired because he’s tugging on his ears through the second book. It’s his tell. A clear signal that he’s ready to be laid down and won’t get up again until morning. And it’s a good thing too, because after twelve hours of playing and lifting him and carrying him my back is aching and I just want to sit down and relax for a minute or two before we have to drive home.
I spot Sophie and Colton by the outdoor fireplace.
‘Hey guys.’ I lean in and give each of them a hug. ‘Great party. Thank you for having us.’ I feel bad that I haven’t spent any time with the hosts yet, but chasing a one-year-old around keeps you busy.
Sophie’s mouth curls in a smile. It’s so good to see her happy. ‘You look gorgeous tonight.’
I chuckle, realizing she usually only sees me dressed for work. And since I work at home, my ensemble usually consists of a pair of faded yoga pants and a stretched out t-shirt.
If I’m being honest, the only reason I took the extra time and care getting ready – wearing a sundress, curling my hair – was because I knew I’d see Pace again. It’s stupid, and I brush off her compliment.
‘Max is sleeping in your den. Hope that’s okay,’ I say.
‘Absolutely,’ Colton says. ‘You could have put him upstairs in a bed, you know?’
I wave him off. ‘He’s fine. But thank you.’
‘Looks like he had fun with Pace today,’ Colton remarks, watching me closely to see my reaction. Colton and his brother are really quite different. Where Colton is intense, calculated and exacting in everything he does, Pace is open and easy going and puts a smile on your face, despite your best efforts to hate him.
I want to drill him for information, ask him what is up with Pace’s attention toward me and my son, but I don’t want to appear to be overly interested. ‘Just a couple more days until you guys set off, right?’ I ask.
Colton wraps his arms around Sophie’s middle and tugs her back against him. ‘It’ll be Sophie’s first time in Africa. The first of many, hopefully. I’m anxious to see all the progress from my visit there two years ago.’
Colton and I discuss the logistics of their trip, while Sophie peppers us with questions of her own. They’ve each been receiving the necessary vaccinations before their travel, and have their passports and travel visas ready. They’ll be gone for three weeks. I’ll miss seeing Sophie on the days she works with me.
‘I wish you could come, Kylie,’ Sophie says. ‘Would your nanny stay with Max?’
I shrug. ‘She probably would if I asked her, but I don’t think I could handle being separated from Max for so long.’ He is my heart.
She nods like she understands. But I don’t think she truly does. She will when she’s a mother.
Pace wanders over in bare feet, his white shirtsleeves are pushed up, showing off tan and muscular forearms sprinkled with light hair. He’s dangling a bottle of beer from one hand and grinning at me.
‘Where’s your mini?’ he asks, looking directly at me.
My belly tightens. ‘He’s all partied-out.’
‘Excuse us,’ Colton says. ‘We’ve got to go say goodnight to Dad. He’s still operating on the eastern time zone.’ He leads Sophie away and I’m, once again, alone with Pace. I’m not sure why I feel so out of my element when I’m near him. It’s probably because I don’t understand his motivations, I decide.
‘Care to join me by the water?’ he asks.
‘Sure.’ He leads me toward the beach. And even though my brain is screaming at me to say no, my feet carry me down toward the water, following closely behind him.
Pace
I lead Kylie to a secluded spot on the beach. After seeing her with the little koala bear she’s had attached to her hip or by her side all afternoon, it’s like part of her is missing. There’s something I don’t like about it.
‘This okay?’ I ask, indicating a dry spot in the sand where the tall grasses shield some of the wind blowing in off the water.
‘Fine,’ she says, lowering herself down. ‘The monitor should still work out here.’ Kylie crosses her legs and folds her hands in her lap.
I sink down beside her. The sand is warm and sugar soft. The gentle sounds of the low rolling waves and moonlight gleaming down on us make a romantic backdrop. If she were any other woman, I would have her down on her knees by now with my cock deep in her throat. To be honest, I’m a bit at a loss right now, unsure what to do or say next. It’s an interesting change for me.
‘Did you enjoy yourself tonight?’ I ask.
‘Max had fun, so that was good.’
It wasn’t what I’d asked her, but I let it go.
When she talks about her son, her eyes light up and her mouth curves into a silly grin. It’s actually quite adorable. She’s a far cry from the women in my past. For one, she’s not all over me, and two, she’s mostly quiet and contemplative as she looks out at the water. She feels no need to fill the silence with nonsense jabber. It’s refreshing.
She’s never fake, never tries to impress me, she’s just comfortable in her own skin and that makes the man inside me take notice.
From the corner of my vision, I watch the breeze lift the stray pieces of hair that have escaped her ponytail. They flutter around her neck and cheeks while Kylie looks straight ahead, watching the waves. I’m certain she has no idea how beautiful she is with her minimal makeup and no-fuss style. I was noticing things I never took the time to notice before, like the delicate scent hanging around her, and how soft and smooth her skin looks.
When you fuck a woman in the bathroom of a nightclub, there’s no reason to take her out again. Where’s the chase? The mystery? I liked to get a little crazy now and then, but I still believed a woman should behave like a woman. Kylie is every bit poised and put together with a shit ton of mystery and enough depth to make me want to give chase.
In Los Angeles her modesty is refreshing. She would be the type of woman to age gracefully. No injections or fillers or skin pulled too tight around her eyes. She’d still be beautiful at sixty. I could see it now. Long silver hair, the same cheeky gleam in her green eyes, as she pushed up on her toes to kiss her grown son on the cheek.
‘I should go. It’s late, and…’
Hell, I can’t let her walk away yet. ‘Max’s asleep inside, right?’
She looks down at the baby monitor in her hands. ‘Yes, but…’
‘You could stay for a little while longer, couldn’t you?’
She looks like she wants to say no, but then at the last minute, she surprises me. ‘I suppose so.’
‘I know you said you’re not much of a drinker, but could I get you anything…water? Soda?’
‘No, I’m fine. You didn’t have to hang around us all night, Max and I, I mean,’ she says.
‘I wanted to, Kylie.’
She swallows and glances up at my eyes, trying to read if I’m feeding her a line. ‘Pace, I’ve worked for Colton for over a year now. He’s told me a few stories about his younger brother. I know this isn’t you. You’re not the guy who’s looking to settle down with a single mom. You said so yourself at the gala.’
‘Then what kind of guy am I, Kylie?’
Her brilliant emerald gaze flashes on mine, looking dark and dangerous. ‘You’re the guy who drops panties and breaks hearts and does it all with a sultry grin. I’ve heard the stories. They’re a bit wild.’ She winks.
I’m going to fucking kill Colton. I don’t care that it’s his engagement party. He’s a dead man. Shit, I realize I can’t do that to Sophie. I’ll just have to come up with some type of plan B to make him pay.
‘Unless you have some type of mommy dearest issue you need to explore?’ she raises a brow.
Her joke is off color, but she doesn’t know it. ‘I lost my mother when I was nine.’
‘Oh, God, I didn’t know. I’m so sorry.’ Her hands flies to her chest and stays there while she watches me.
‘It’s okay. You didn’t know.’
‘I’m sorry. Colton never mentioned it.’ Her tone is tender and caring.
I shrug. I’m not surprised. ‘It’s not something we like to discuss.’
As we sit here together in the company of the endless blue ocean, I can’t help but wonder if my interest in Kylie has anything to do with the fact that I do see her as a mother. Her softness, the love I see pouring out of her in every interaction with Max – maybe those are things that attract me to her. Her warmth, her devotion – they are all part of what makes her beautiful. It doesn’t take a psychiatrist to find the link here. But it isn’t something I care to dwell on.
Beside me, Kylie cups handfuls of sand and lets them drift through her parted fingers like a sieve.
‘Can I ask you something?’ I ask.
She nods.
‘What happened to Max’s father?’ It’s something I’ve wondered about since the first time I met her, but I’m only brave enough to ask now, in the cover of night, and once she’s already stumbled over the death of my mother.
She pauses her motions, letting the sand fall from her hands, then dusts them off. ‘Have you ever been in love, Pace?’ she surprises me by asking.
‘No.’
‘Never?’
‘Nope.’ I’m hopeful that it’ll happen someday, I just haven’t gotten there yet. I’ve been too busy building my career and sleeping my way through the LA singles scene.
‘It’s a scary thing – handing your heart over like that. Giving someone the very best pieces of yourself.’ Her eyes are far away and she remains staring out at the water as she speaks. ‘I met Max’s father, Elan, when I first moved to Los Angeles a few years ago. He was quite a bit older than me, thirty-six at the time, already settled and successful. I didn’t know anyone in the city, and he seemed like a safe choice. We dated for about six months, and even though we never talked about our future in the terms of marriage and children, I felt like we were building toward something real and long-lasting. We stayed together every weekend, at either his place or mine. And even though we were careful – I was on birth control at the time – somehow, I got pregnant. I guess they’re serious with those fine print warnings about no birth control method being one-hundred percent effective. I just never thought anything like that would happen to me.’
The urge to reach over and take her hand in mine is nearly overwhelming. I fist my hands in my lap instead and wait for Kylie to continue.
‘I was scared when I found out – mostly because it was so unexpected. I was just getting my career off the ground, and my relationship with Elan was still pretty new. I never thought I had to worry about being a single mom, though. I wasn’t scared to tell Elan. He’d never been anything other than loving and kind toward me.’ Kylie’s tone tightens at the end, like she has something stuck in her throat.
I hate the direction this story is headed and I hate myself even more for asking and making her relive all these bitter memories. I want to kick myself in the balls for my curiosity.
‘I called him over to the apartment I lived in at the time, I didn’t want to tell him over the phone. He came over, playful and curious about what it was that I wanted to say. But the moment the words, ‘I’m pregnant’ left my lips, all playfulness evaporated. His entire demeanor changed. The kind side of him disappeared and was replaced with a man who was suddenly all business. He wanted to know when, how and what I planned to do about it. It took me several moments to understand he wasn’t using the word we. He was asking about what I planned to do. I was on my own from that point forward, it was just me and the little life growing inside of me. I felt sick and hollow. He had put this baby inside me and now he suddenly wanted nothing to do with us. It was a harrowing feeling.’
Kylie’s quiet for a moment and there’s no way in hell I’m probing any further, but I can tell this story is far from over. And I have a feeling it’s going to get even more heart-wrenching before it gets better.
‘Elan stopped calling, he stopped responding to my texts and emails. He cut all ties. When I was about six months pregnant, I ran into him at the drug store one night. I had a massive craving for ice cream and ventured out in my maternity pajamas to pick some up. I still cringe thinking about what I must have looked like to him.’ She shudders and buries her face in her hands.
Picturing her with a firm, round belly, I see nothing she should feel ashamed about. She’s a gorgeous woman – and while I’m not typically attracted to pregnant women, Kylie with a baby growing inside of her makes my mouth curl into a dopey grin.
‘I saw him and some young blonde piece of arm candy,’ she continues. ‘They were buying condoms at the checkout counter. His eyes slid from mine down to my rounded belly and back up again. He made some comment to the sales clerk about using condoms, even when a woman claims to be on birth control. And then he was gone. I hated myself for trusting him with my heart. I hated myself for still missing him. But the most painful thing of all came a few weeks later. His assistant delivered a check for fifty grand and the note inside said that he didn’t want to be bothered with making weekly child support payments, and that I should use the money to start a college savings fund. Which, of course, I did – for Max’s sake – even though I hated accepting that money from him. I’ve had no other contact with him,’ she finishes.
‘What about when Max was born?’ I can’t understand a man who would just walk away from his woman and child – especially this woman. She is so strong and independent and stunningly beautiful.
‘Nothing,’ she says. ‘When I went into labor, I called a cab, took myself to the hospital and had the baby.’
‘What about your family?’ I ask. Surely she has someone to count on when she needs it.
She shrugs. ‘My parents divorced when I was little. I don’t have much of a relationship with my dad and my mom is…well, she’s always been more preoccupied with living her own life than participating in mine.’
‘What’s Elan’s last name?’ I ask.
‘Why?’ she looks up to meet my eyes.
‘I want to kick his fucking ass, that’s why.’ My chest feels tight and my knuckles are itching to be busted over something – preferably his face.
‘It’s okay, Pace. I’m over Elan now. Completely. The only thing that still makes my heart hurt is knowing that one day I’ll have to answer questions from Max about why his own father wanted nothing to do with him.’
‘I’m sorry I pried into all of this. I know it’s none of my business.’ I feel like a grade-A asshole.
‘It’s okay,’ she says, digging her bare toes into the warm sand, her sandals long ago kicked aside. ‘It’s taught me that I need to be better at picking men. A beautiful man with a smooth tongue who says all the right things doesn’t excite me anymore.’
She’s letting me inside, and I appreciate the glimpse at her inner thoughts. Turning to face her, I ask, ‘What does excite you?’
‘A man who is kind to my child.’
Her answer is so poised, so simple; I can tell she means it entirely.
I wonder if that’s how she views me. I hope so. I genuinely enjoyed playing with Max today and I hope she doesn’t think I did it just to try and get into her panties. Which is what she probably expects, based on the stories she’s heard from Colt. That shithead. My resolve to kick his ass is back again, full force.
‘At the point I’m at, actions speak louder than words,’ she says. ‘I should probably go, I’ve said too much, I’m sure.’
‘Don’t go. Not yet.’ I’m laying myself bare, so much more so than I ever do. My game is completely fucking shot, and I don’t care.
‘This isn’t what my life is like, Pace. It’s not all backyard barbecues where there are lots of helping hands, or fancy galas downtown.’
‘I get that, Kylie. You have responsibilities. I see that.’
‘It’s hard work, Pace, and it’s a twenty-four seven job. No sick days. No time off. And I know you’ll say it doesn’t matter – but it does. You’re a Drake. I’ve seen the lives you guys lead. It’s champagne and caviar and designer everything.’
She has no way of knowing, but I’m not really like my brothers in that regard. I live in a simple two-bedroom condo, not a mansion on the beach like Colton and Collins each do. ‘A man gets tired of champagne and caviar after a while,’ I say, trying to make light of her jab.
‘So you want to slum it for a while?’
‘You are not slumming it. Max is not slumming it.’
Her eyes flash on mine and I can tell that my words have touched something inside of her. ‘No, but we’re not what you’re used to.’
‘Maybe I’m tired of the same old–same old.’ I look her straight in the eyes as I say this, letting my meaning sink in.
She matches my serious gaze with one of her own. ‘And what about when you get tired of us? I can’t have my son getting attached, only to have you disappear one day when you decide you’re done playing house.’
Damn. She’s better at this verbal sparring than me, and I fucking hate it.
‘I still want to take you to dinner,’ I say.
‘I appreciate it, but I’m just not ready for anything like that.’ Kylie rises to her feet, and heads for the house. ‘Goodnight Pace.’
Fuck.
We’d had a great night and just when we’d finally started to make some progress, she completely shot me down. I was tired of being told that I wasn’t mature enough to handle the responsibility of dating a woman with a child. I wanted a fair chance. But as I watched her walk away, the defeated set to her shoulders, I realized she didn’t want to be right about me. She just expected me to let her down.
‘Kylie, wait up,’ I call, hopping to my feet and sprinting after her. I catch her on the patio where she’s stuffing their things into a bag. Stray toys, a sippy cup and a baggie of cereal are all scattered at her feet. She lifts her chin and her eyes find mine. Confusion washes over her features. ‘Let me help you get Max to the car,’ I explain.
She doesn’t respond. She just gazes up at me. But since she didn’t refuse, I reach down and take the bag from her, adding the stray items and zipping it up. ‘I got this.’
She watches me with mild curiosity, her pretty green eyes wide, like she’s taking it all in, trying to dissect what I’m doing when she just shot me down a mere thirty seconds ago. Hell, I don’t even know. I’m just following my instincts. I’m not trying to impress her or play some game, and it’s incredibly refreshing.
Kylie’s quiet as we head into the house. I’m not sure where Max is sleeping, but she leads me into the den. It’s dark and silent, except for the little breathy sounds coming from the sleeping infant. He’s on the floor on some type of sleeping mat. We stand over him for just a second, watching him. His mouth lifts in his sleep, and I suddenly find myself wondering what he could be dreaming about. Probably his pretty momma. A thought that warms me.
‘May I?’ I whisper.
She nods and takes the bag from me. I bend down and ever so gently lift the little guy from the floor. I bring him up to my chest, holding him close. He opens one eye, checking to see who’s got him, and then drops his head to my shoulder, where it rests all the way to the car. His limp little body molds to mine, and I can feel his hot breath against my neck. Smiling, I give his back a gentle pat, careful not to wake him.
Kylie watches everything, then opens the door to the backseat and I place him in his car-seat while she leans over me and buckles him in. The scent of vanilla and delicate feminine skin wafts up to greet me. The scent awakens something in me. Perhaps it was watching her with her baby all afternoon, seeing her as a mother, and now experiencing the softness of her as a woman that stirs something in me. Compared to the one-dimensional women I usually date, it’s a welcome reprieve.
Standing in the driveway with the moonlight pouring down on us, neither of us says a word. Kylie closes the car door and we both check through the window to see if the sound woke Max. It didn’t.
‘I could have gotten him,’ she says, turning to me.
‘I know.’
She watches me intently, as if trying to figure out my angle. It’s the same look she gave me when I took Max from her earlier to show him the frog I had found in the garden.
‘Drive safe,’ I tell her.
‘I will.’ Without another word, she slips into the driver’s seat.
I remain rooted in the driveway until she pulls away and I can no longer see her taillights. It hasn’t even been two minutes, and I’m already plotting out ways to see her again.
Inside I find Sophie stationed at the kitchen island, her mouth stuffed full of a bite of cake.
I grin when I spot her and her eyes widen like she’s been caught.
‘Don’t look at me like that,’ she says, licking the frosting from her thumb. ‘I barely got to eat with all the mingling and talking.’
Holding up my hands, I motion for her to continue. ‘Don’t stop on my account.’ I grab a slice of the cake with my fingers. ‘Here, I’ll even join you. Cheers.’
‘Cheers.’ She touches the edge of her cake to mine and we eat in silence, enjoying the comfortable moment between us. Sophie already feels like family, so much more so than Colton’s ex. That was one woman I couldn’t stand being near. Sophie, I wouldn’t mind cloning. That thought instantly makes me sad. She had a twin sister that she lost. I can still see a touch of sadness in her eyes, but considering everything, she’s doing great.
We eat, moving on to the appetizer trays containing cheese puffs and crab rolls, while Sophie tells me stories of all the extended relatives and friends of the family she met tonight.
‘I need your opinion on something,’ I say, wiping my hands on a cloth napkin.
‘Wow, Pace needs me for something…I feel honored,’ she says, grinning at me. ‘What is it?’
‘There’s a woman I’m interested in,’ I start.
Footsteps behind me cause me to turn. It’s Colton, looking for his bride-to-be, no doubt.
‘As long as it’s not Kylie, go to town,’ he says.
I hiss out a breath. ‘I like her, dude. What’s your problem?’ I’d intended to have a calm, rational conversation with Sophie. I already know my brother’s views on this, and it pisses me off.
‘She’s a single mom,’ Colton says, like I don’t know this fact.
‘I’m well aware. Do you think I missed the mini-human who was attached to her hip all night?’ I actually viewed him as a sort of bonus.
Sophie’s watching all of this, her eyes whipping back and forth between us as she struggles to catch up. ‘Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad, Colton,’ she says, placing her hand on his arm. ‘Pace is a nice guy. Kylie’s a sweet girl.’
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Kendall Ryan
***Warning – 18+ contains explicit sexual situations and language*** from the author of Filthy Beautiful Lies and Filthy Beautiful Love.‘Tell me what you need,’ I ask, lacing my fingers with hers. The simple act of holding her hand makes my blood pump faster.‘I need you to be careful with me and Max,’ she whispers.Pace Drake loves sex, and he makes no apology for getting what he wants, when he wants it. But when he meets, Kylie Sloan, he’s enthralled by her and begins to question his standard operating procedure. Kylie’s depth and determination make the hookups that fill his weekends seem empty and shallow. She doesn’t want or need anyone to take care of her and that only makes him want to care for her more.Kylie’s trust in men has vanished. The last man she was with played ding-dong-ditch-it with her uterus and now the infant son he left her to raise alone is the only man she has time for. Pace wants to prove to her that he is one of the good guys, but can she really trust that his days of hitting it and quitting it are gone forever?
Published by HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd
1 London Bridge Street
London SE1 9GF
www.harpercollins.co.uk (http://www.harpercollins.co.uk)
First published by Kendall Ryan Books 2014
First published in Great Britain by Harper 2015
Copyright © Kendall Ryan 2015
Cover layout design © HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd 2015
Cover photographs © Gallerystock
Kendall Ryan asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.
A catalogue copy of this book is available from the British Library.
This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.
Source ISBN: 9781502478276
Ebook Edition © February 2015 ISBN: 9780008133894
Version 2015-02-02
Praise for Filthy Beautiful Lies (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
‘Provocative and filthy…I. Love. This. Book.’ – Roxy Sloane, #1 bestselling erotica author
‘Every Kendall Ryan book should come with a fan and some batteries because they are that hot.’ – Lauren Blakely, New York Times & USA Today bestselling author
‘Compelling characters in a wicked hot story. Kendall Ryan is a goddess.’ – Lexi Ryan, New York Times & USA Today bestselling author
‘Intense, consuming, and ridiculously sexy…Kendall Ryan has outdone herself yet again.’ – Emma Hart, New York Times bestselling author
‘Sinfully enticing, sexually charged and lust driven! Filthy Beautiful Lies is Kendall Ryan at her devastatingly best.’ – Rachel Brookes, author of the bestselling Breathe series
Contents
Cover (#ub4c3d0f3-de41-533d-8427-e449af26bf66)
Title Page (#u94eeadb6-4c69-5cf3-bd7c-9905705f3c05)
Copyright (#uc7e66c46-059c-5673-a363-af20ba9c62ed)
Praise for Filthy Beautiful Lies (#uc4a2fd16-a396-54d8-a645-58f8594d76f6)
Chapter One (#ud4c1ca7f-bf97-582c-bb76-af594fc3334c)
Chapter Two (#udbed5d09-bfa8-50bd-b491-a53414c254ff)
Chapter Three (#u89ef8f45-63db-52c1-abcb-e79ebd11c0bd)
Chapter Four (#uaf7981ac-3fe5-57ef-8a2f-d54f4c009565)
Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)
KR Page Lies (#litres_trial_promo)
KR Page Love (#litres_trial_promo)
KR Page Forever (#litres_trial_promo)
KR Page When I Break (#litres_trial_promo)
About the Author (#litres_trial_promo)
Tell Me Your Favorite Part! (#litres_trial_promo)
Connect With Kendall Ryan: (#litres_trial_promo)
Also by Kendall Ryan (#litres_trial_promo)
W6 Book Cafe (#litres_trial_promo)
About the Publisher (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter One (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
Pace
The blonde on my arm is driving me nuts. If it weren’t for her giant fake tits, that I very much want to play with later, I would have ditched her at the door.
We’re at a fancy gala for Colton’s charity, and the five thousand dollar a plate dinner is designed to bring in the last of the donations needed to ensure the school and hospital he plans to open are fully funded in the years to come. It’s a great cause. But all I want to do is leave.
‘Pace,’ my date says, tugging on my tuxedo-clad elbow. ‘Which one is your brother again?’
The one that looks exactly fucking like me, I want to answer. Instead, I point straight ahead to where Colton is standing talking with a group of benefactors. ‘Right there in the center. That’s Colton. And his fiancée Sophie is beside him.’
We’ve been mistaken for twins numerous times. He’s three years older, but we share many similar features – tall stature, dark hair, deep blue eyes. The main difference – where Colton is hard edges and serious expressions – I’m friendly, open and relaxed. Life is too damn short to take so seriously. But apparently, grasping our similarities is beyond the capabilities of her three brain cells.
‘Are you going to introduce me?’ she asks.
She wants to meet my family? No. But rather than provide her with an answer she doesn’t want to hear, I choose that moment to take a swig of my bourbon and pretend I didn’t hear her.
I’d invited Sheena here tonight after meeting her at my health club. I didn’t want to come to Colton and Sophie’s big event alone and thought it might be nice to have someone to talk to over dinner. Unfortunately the only thing Sheena wanted to discuss was her recent enhancements and how the plastic surgeon convinced her to go to a bigger cup size and how she thought he only wanted to sleep with her.
Well no shit he wanted to fuck you sweetheart. Line forms to the left, gentlemen.
After enduring two hours with the date from hell, all I want to do is fuck her in my car, and drop her off at home. Classy, I know. But you try spending ten thousand dollars on dinner for the world’s most annoying date. I deserve a blow job at the very least.
Something tells me that on Monday I’ll be looking for a new health club…
I’ve changed gyms six times this year. The cancellation fees are killing me. Maybe it’s time to rethink my pick up strategy. Nah. There are lots of places in town with treadmills and free weights, and I have no problem switching clubs just to avoid running into my former hookups.
‘Let’s get you another champagne,’ I say, steering her toward the bar.
Once Sheena is situated on a bar stool, I slip away, making an excuse to use the men’s room. Instead I head straight for where Sophie and Kylie are talking across the room.
My brother’s fiancé, Sophie Evans, looks great tonight. Long silky dress, jewels at her throat and her hair is twisted up in some type of knot. She looks happy.
‘Hey, sis,’ I greet her with a kiss to the back of her hand.
I won’t treat her any differently after her sister’s passing, because I know she wouldn’t want it, but I do try to be sweet to her. After everything she’s been through, she didn’t break, and I’m so thankful. Colton needs a strong woman, and Sophie is the perfect complement to him. I don’t plan to settle down anytime soon, but one day I hope to find a girl as good as Sophie. I still think his story about how they met and why she’d moved in was bullshit, but it didn’t really matter. Colt was a lucky guy, and he knew it.
‘Hi, Pace.’ Sophie grins up at me.
Next I turn to Kylie, who I’ve been trying to figure out for the past several months. She works for my brother, running the office operations for his charity, and I’m pretty sure she’s responsible for tonight’s gala. She’s stunning – in a deep purple gown that flows beautifully over her curves, fiery auburn hair that falls in loose waves over her shoulders and brilliant green eyes that sparkle on mine. The way she watches me sends tingles shooting down my body, pulsing in my groin. My cock begins to swell. What the fuck? She’s exquisite and classy and put together. The complete fucking opposite of my date.
‘It’s a great event. Congratulations,’ I lift her hand to my mouth and whisper against the back of it while watching her eyes.
She flinches at the contact and tugs her hand back, but treats me to a kind smile. ‘Thank you, Pace.’ The tone of her warm voice wrapping around my name is fucking sinful. I want to hear her moan out my name when she climaxes, I want to see her green eyes darken with lust, and watch her completely come apart beneath me.
I know she’s a single mom, and I should just steer clear. She’s nothing like the women I typically date, but something about her hypnotizes me.
‘Where’s your date?’ Sophie asks.
‘I’m not sure,’ I lie. I can see her from the corner of my eye, she’s still at the bar and seems to be chatting it up with the bartender. Good. Maybe I can offload her on him tonight. I wouldn’t mind going home instead with the elegant and sophisticated beauty I see before me.
‘I was hoping to meet her,’ Sophie says.
Sophie doesn’t understand there’s a reason I’ve never introduced her to any of the women I’m seeing. They’re all temporary. And besides, I doubt they’d hit it off. Sophie’s interests go a little deeper than nail polish and handbags. My brother chose well.
‘Isn’t that the woman you were with?’ Kylie asks, pointing across the room.
I follow her gaze to Sheena.
Fuck.
Sheena is currently bent backwards over the top of the bar. Her tits are practically hanging out, and she’s letting the bartender pour shots of tequila down her throat.
Christ. This isn’t a college frat party. It’s an exclusive black-tie affair for millionaires and politicians and the nation’s leading entrepreneurs. We’re here for an important cause, not to get wasted and dance on the damn bar. But something tells me my date doesn’t get that.
I don’t often feel embarrassed, and shit, I love to cut loose and have fun as much as anyone, but this is not the time, nor the place. My face flushes slightly and I clench my jaw.
I like a woman who knows how to handle herself – someone poised and put together when she needs to be and freaky as hell in between the sheets. My eyes find Kylie’s and something tells me she’d be that kind of woman.
‘Yeah, Sheena’s fun,’ I say, clenching my fists in an attempt to hide my true feelings.
Kylie frowns. ‘I introduced myself to her earlier, and she said her name was Trina.’
‘Shit. Is it?’ I rub a hand through my hair. The look in her eyes tells me this is a piece of information I should have known.
Sophie excuses herself a moment later, and I’m thankful for the private moment with Kylie.
‘Can I get you something else to drink?’ I offer, tossing her a flirty grin.
Her answering smile is coy, guarded. ‘Shouldn’t you be getting back to your date?’
A quick look over my shoulder at Sheena, or Trina, or whoever the hell she is, tells me I have no desire to spend any more time with her. In contrast to the beautiful woman standing before me, my date is all but forgotten. I might have thought she was sexy before, but now, I’m seeing her more clearly. Her dress is too short and her breasts are too big, even for my sizeable hands, while Kylie, in comparison, is perfectly proportioned–soft and curvy–just like a woman should be. I wouldn’t mind devoting hours to exploring the valleys of her body. With my tongue. And my cock. The bastard throbs at the thought.
‘She looks pretty well taken care of right now,’ I remark.
The bartender is all but ignoring the other customers in his eagerness to talk to her. He can have her for all I care. Good luck, buddy.
Kylie sets down her empty wine glass on the tray of a passing waiter. ‘I’m actually not much of a drinker. A glass of wine or two is generally my limit.’
Good to know. I file that information away. Remembering her kid, I ask about him. ‘Where’s Max tonight?’
She smiles lightly as though thinking about her baby brightens her mood. I like that, and I don’t have a frigging clue why. ‘His nanny stayed late tonight. I’m sure he’s in bed by now.’
I still recall that day in the pool last summer when I’d taken the crying baby from her and entertained him all afternoon. I couldn’t even be sure why I’d done it. I suppose, looking back, she just looked like she could use a hand. I’ve never liked seeing a woman struggle. Although a damsel in distress, she is not. I get the sense she’s not the type to back down from a challenge and has enough strength and determination to succeed at just about anything she tried. A sexy quality, to be sure.
As we stand there, me sipping my bourbon, and Kylie grinning politely at the crowd, the silence between us grows. I feel like we have nothing in common, and I’m at a loss, trying to think of something to say, anything that will keep this beauty in my presence. There are so many things I want to know about her, but none of them are any of my goddamn business. How she tastes, what noises she makes when she comes. I also want to know how she ended up a single mother, and if Max’s dad is still in the picture. I tried asking Colton about it once, but he remained incredibly vague. The asshat. If there was a worst wingman award, it would go to my brother.
‘Have dinner with me this week,’ I say. It wasn’t what I’d been planning to say, but once the words leave my mouth, they feel right.
‘Pace, that’s sweet of you to ask, but I can’t…’ She pauses, like she wants to say more, but doesn’t. Her body language is all wrong too. Where women are normally vying to get closer, placing their hand on my bicep, or even brushing their breasts against my arm, Kylie stands straight and tall, like she wants to avoid physical contact at all costs.
‘Are you here with someone?’ I ask. It’s also absolutely none of my business, but I’d happily shell out ten grand just to find out if she’s fucking someone.
‘No,’ she confirms.
‘No boyfriend?’ I press further. I need to know what I’m up against.
‘There’s been no one since Max’s father,’ she says quietly.
My inner alpha male beats on his chest in triumph. ‘That’s quite a dry spell.’
‘Indeed,’ she murmurs.
‘It’s just dinner, Kylie. It’s not like I’m offering to step in and play daddy.’ I treat her to a playful, crooked smile, my dimple out in full force. I’ve heard it’s quite irresistible and that’s what I’m banking on.
‘That’s exactly why I can’t. I’m sorry.’
Fuck. Why am I such a fucking idiot?
‘Oh,’ I stammer, at a loss for words for the first damn time in my life. Christ. Grow a pair, Pace.
‘Besides, something tells me if you’re interested in a woman like that,’ Kylie tips her chin toward the bar where Sheena, or Trina, is making a spectacle of herself, ‘you can’t possibly be interested in a woman like me.’
Hold the fuck on. Now that’s where she’s wrong. ‘Why’s that?’ I ask, meeting her fiery green gaze. If she’s about to criticize herself, I will not hold back in proving to her how very wrong she is.
‘Pace,’ she admonishes. ‘Look at her. They look…inflatable.’
When I realize she’s not tearing herself down, but instead chastising my taste in women, I almost want to laugh. ‘A woman like that is good for only one thing and we both know it,’ I say.
She raises her eyebrows, waiting for me to explain.
‘One good fuck,’ I continue.
‘You’re crass.’ Her eyes light up, and her mouth twitches in an attempt not to smile.
‘I’m direct, and you like it.’
She shrugs. ‘At least you’re honest. That’s more than I can say for most men.’
‘Go out with me. One time, Kylie. What do you have to lose?’
I can practically see the wheels turning in her head, and for one brief, beautiful moment I think I might have a chance. ‘Bye Pace.’ She turns and walks away, her long legs carrying her across the room while my heart throbs.
Fuck.
‘Kylie, wait.’
She turns and tosses me a sexy wink. ‘Go have fun with Malibu Barbie.’
This is not over.
I play to win.
Chapter Two (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
Kylie
This is not my real life.
My real life is not evening gowns and silk panties and fancy dinners. It’s heating bottles up at two a.m., spit-up stains on my yoga pants and fishing Cheerios out from between my couch cushions. But it feels amazing to pretend, if only for a brief moment.
As I sit in the back of the limousine Colton insisted I take, I remove my earrings one at a time and drop them into my handbag. The twinkling city lights blur past as we cruise down the freeway, and my thoughts drift back to the gala. The event had turned out beautifully, even better than I could have expected. But of course it isn’t the details of the fundraiser occupying my brain. It’s a certain six-foot, two-inch, well-muscled slice of man named Pace Drake. My boss’s younger brother. And there is no way he’d be interested in the real me.
I chuckle to myself, remembering that he didn’t even know his date’s name. I should feel outraged that he all but ignored her in favor of paying me compliments and asking me out. Instead I’m strangely flattered. When a man as handsome as Pace paid you attention it felt wonderful. Especially for someone like me. He could have any woman he wanted. And for some strange reason he’d set his sights on me – with my post-pregnancy body that is still curvier than I would have liked.
But I’d shot him down, which I know is for the best. I have personal experience with men like him. They’re looking for no-strings sex. And considering the last guy I was with played ding-dong-ditch-it with my uterus, and left me with a baby to raise, I’m more than a teensy bit skeptical about men like him.
Max is the only man I have time for these days. And the only man I will give my heart to.
I can’t resist pulling out my iPhone to look at the pictures of Max. Just as I know I won’t be able to resist going into his room to listen to the sounds of him breathing and leaning down to his crib to smell his baby scent, even though I know there’s a chance it’ll wake him. But his chunky baby thighs and big round tummy are too much for this mama to resist.
It was actually quite sweet of Pace to ask about Max. Last summer, the first time I’d met Pace at Colton’s pool party, he carted a screaming, teething Max around all that afternoon, swimming with him in the pool and bouncing him in his big arms. Colton seemed to have no explanation for Pace’s sudden interest in the baby. I was convinced it was merely him taking pity on his brother’s employee. I was beyond stressed out when Max was cutting his first two teeth. And I’m sure I looked it.
As flattered as I am about his interest in me, I’m fine with being celibate and focusing on my career and being a mom. Well, that’s not entirely true. I do miss having a man in my life. I miss strong arms holding me close, the brush of a stubbled cheek on mine, the feeling of absolute security. When I’m ready to start a relationship again, it will be with a man who makes me feel safe. There is nothing safe about Pace Drake.
He’s as dangerous as they come. Young. Sexy. Wealthy. Carefree. The dark, hungry look in his eyes promised me hot, intense sex. I shiver, recalling the way my body responded under his watchful stare. Yes, I’m sure he’d be a wild beast in bed, probably with a giant cock to match his stamina, not that I will ever know such things.
As the limo driver pulls to a stop in front of my house, I push all the crazy thoughts from my head. Fantasies are nice, but it’s time to get back to my real life.
Chapter Three (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
Pace
I haven’t stopped thinking about her since Saturday night. No, not Malibu Barbie. I’d accepted her proffered blow job on the drive home – it was mediocre – and then dropped her off at her front door. I haven’t heard from her since. Which is just as well, because it’s Kylie I can’t seem to get out of my brain.
I had no doubt she saw straight through me because that sassy mouth of hers had called me out on the one-night stand. I know there’s no way we’d fit neatly into each other’s worlds, but I have to try.
When I arrive at Colton’s office just after lunchtime, I find him standing beside his assistant’s desk, flipping through a stack of documents.
‘Hey bro.’ I slap him on the back. ‘You have a minute for your favorite brother?’
He rises to his full height and frowns at me. ‘Do I have a choice?’
I roll my eyes. I know he doesn’t like being interrupted during the work day. But too damn bad. I’d helped him with his woman plenty of times. ‘No. Now come on.’
I let myself into his adjoining office and hear his footsteps behind me. I’m not usually one for midday drinks, but rather than sit down in one of the plush armchairs that provide the perfect view of the Los Angeles skyline, I head to his liquor cabinet. What the hell, I could use some loosening up. I’ve been wound as tight as a damn virgin since Kylie walked away from my invitation on Saturday night. Women didn’t refuse me, and so to say I’m thrown off my game is putting it mildly.
‘Want one?’ I ask, removing a glass and the bottle of pricey bourbon from the cabinet.
Colton shakes his head. ‘What’s going on, man? Everything okay?’
I take a sip of the liquor and immediately decide drinking is a bad idea. I’m already on edge and frustrated. The alcohol will only make me obsess more. Abandoning the glass, I sit down in a leather chair across from him and let out a heavy sigh. ‘Tell me about Kylie.’
His gaze narrows. ‘Fuck no. You and Kylie?’ He shakes his head, rising to his feet. ‘No. Abso-fucking-lutely not. If this is what you came here to talk to me about, you can leave now.’ He points to the door, his expression unwavering.
Goddamn. ‘You’re no fun.’ Changing my mind, I stride over to the cabinet, grab the glass and down the rest of the drink. It burns like a motherfucker on the way down, but it’ll do the trick, numbing whatever this weird sensation is inside my chest.
‘I’m serious, Pace. She’s a good girl. She doesn’t need to get tangled up in your…ways…’
‘My ways?’ Now I’m getting pissed. He’s saying I’m not good enough for her.
‘Hit it and quit it. Pump and dump. Whatever you want to call it, it’s not happening. Not with Kylie.’
‘I know that, asshole. I wanted to take her out – like legitimately take her out to dinner. Enjoy her company.’
He frowns at me again, that crease in his forehead deepening. ‘You’re telling me you don’t want to fuck her?’
‘Don’t be a dumbshit. Of course I want to fuck her. But I’m just saying that I wouldn’t hit it once and never call her again.’
‘What would you do, then? Move in? Marry her? Raise her son?’ he challenges.
‘I haven’t thought that fucking far ahead. Christ.’ Now I’m pacing the floor of his office and I have no idea why. This entire exchange is stressing me out. I came here hoping to get her number, and instead I’m getting grilled like a steak. He’s pulling the older brother card on me like he does so often. The dick.
‘And that’s exactly why I don’t want you messing around with her. You don’t have a plan. Kylie needs a man with a plan. Not one with an agenda that only includes getting his crank yanked.’
I sink down into the chair, hating this concerned sibling act he’s got down to a science.
‘Kylie needs someone ready for a serious relationship. That isn’t you, and this isn’t a good idea, and we both know it.’
‘Just like it wasn’t a good idea for you to marry the mega-bitch Stella. But you didn’t listen to me. You had to find out for yourself.’ His fists clench at his sides. He hates it when I bring up his ex. Too damn bad.
‘You didn’t forget about our engagement party this Saturday, did you?’
‘Of course not,’ I answer. I’d totally forgotten it was this weekend. Good thing Collins and I had already gone in on a gift. ‘Where’s it at again? The Beverly Hills Country Club?’ I smirk. His last engagement party was there.
Colton growls out an expletive, apparently not appreciating my sarcastic sense of humor. ‘No dipshit. Nothing fancy and over the top. This is Sophie, remember?’
Sophie. Of course I remember. She is nothing like his first wife, thank God. That evil bitch would have eaten your balls for breakfast if you weren’t careful. I cup my nuts, remembering her, and shudder.
‘It’s at the house. Six o’clock. We’re grilling and playing yard games,’ Colton finishes.
‘Will Kylie be there?’ I smirk.
‘Get the fuck out,’ he hisses, tossing his stapler at me on my way out the door. It hits the wall with a dull thud, and I know I’m back in the game.
On Saturday afternoon, I’m seated on the diving board, dangling my bare feet in the pool waiting for the party to begin. Sophie and Colton are standing in the backyard, greeting guests as they arrive, accepting congratulations and showing off her engagement ring. There’s still no sight of Kylie. As the days passed, I started to question why my focus was so singularly on this woman. But then I see her, and it all comes rushing back.
She’s wearing a white, gauzy sundress with sandals on her feet. Her hair is tied back into a simple ponytail. She’s stunning. There is something so natural and simple about her. I cannot look away. My eyes wander down her bare legs. They are toned and tanned nicely. I wonder if she’s a runner. Her hand is outstretched and a chubby baby toddles alongside her, holding on to her finger.
It’s been a while since I’ve seen the little guy – I didn’t realize he’d be walking now. I continue watching them from my perch on the diving board.
Kylie leads him over to the bride and groom-to-be, then lifts him into her arms, doling out hugs and well-wishes, though I’m not close enough to hear what is being said.
When I see Collins arrive with our dad, I hop off the diving board, the bottom cuffs of my khaki pants wet, and cross the patio.
‘Hey old man,’ I greet him with a thump on the back.
‘Pace Alexander.’ He grins at me and pulls me into a hug.
It’s been way too long since I’ve seen him. The Christmas before last, I think. I’m pretty sure he has a new, young girlfriend keeping him busy. He still works, but we’re all on him to retire. That way he could spend more time out here in LA with all of us. And I’m sure Colton and Sophie are going to start popping out kids soon enough.
‘What’s her name?’ I ask him.
‘Who?’
‘You look way too fit and happy. There’s gotta be a woman.’
He gives me a sly smile and looks from me, to Collins and back again. ‘I plead the fifth.’
‘Just tell me she’s older than me at least.’
‘How old are you again?’
‘Twenty-five,’ I say.
‘Don’t worry about it, son. Now point me in the direction of this lovely Sophie I’ve heard so much about.’
Collins and I lead him across the yard to meet his future daughter-in-law. Sophie wins my dad over instantly, which is really no surprise. She’s sweet, kind, down to earth and easy to get along with. As we chat and make small talk with the family my eyes keep straying to Kylie. She’s holding Max against her chest as they twirl around in the grass, his squeals of joy audible even from here. I get a strange look from Colton when he catches me watching them. I decide to go now, while he’s busy with Dad, and before he can interfere. The cock-blocking asshole.
Since Max is the only child here, and Colton’s home isn’t exactly kid-friendly, Kylie’s brought her own toys for him to play with. Smart. They’ve already littered the yard with trucks and balls in various sizes and colors.
When I get closer, Max is pushing a green tractor toward her with chubby outstretched hands.
‘Raising him up right, I see.’ I nod toward the John Deere tractor her son is driving.
She looks up at me and smirks. ‘I didn’t know you were familiar with anything outside of BMW and Mercedes.’
She’s called me out and she doesn’t even know it. I drive a BMW M3. ‘A man can still appreciate fine machinery.’ I sink to the ground on bended knees. ‘It’s all about the details. See?’ I lift up the secret hatch under the seat.
Max begins to clap as I drop a couple blades of grass into the hatch and close it once again. He’s delighted to sit here in the grass, opening and closing the new found secret compartment while I talk to the beautiful girl in front of me.
Kylie sinks to ground, and crosses her legs, since she’s in a dress. We sit in silence for a few minutes, just watching him play.
Her son doesn’t look like her. He must get his olive skin tone, and dark hair from his father. But his mannerisms are all her. The way he breaks into a wide smile and squeals with delight reminds me of her own bright smile and hearty laughter. The way he stands and surveys his surroundings with a curious expression is Kylie’s too. They’re both so calm and grounded and there’s something I like about that.
‘Do you want something to drink?’ Kylie does some type of sign-language to him as she speaks and a moment later, he repeats the move back to her. She hands him a blue plastic sippy cup from inside her bag. He brings it to his mouth and tilts his head so far back that he falls into the grass and just lays there, drinking like he’s been travelling through the desert and deprived of liquid. I crack a smile. While he lies there quietly, I take a moment to look at Kylie. To really look at her.
The sun brings out her hair’s reddish undertone. Her skin looks incredibly soft and her mouth is full and has a natural pout that women spend thousands to achieve via plastic surgery.
Her bare shoulders are delicate and tanned. Sticky fingers reach out for her, and she doesn’t hesitate, lifting him into her arms and letting him plaster her cheeks with wet kisses. I wouldn’t know what that felt like – to have a little body clinging to me and so happy just to be near me. Watching her interact with her baby, it’s hard to look away.
Max tosses down his juice cup and wanders from her lap to where I’m sitting. ‘Hi buddy,’ I say, meeting his intense stare. He’s silently watching me, but I can see the wheels turning in his little head. He’s trying to piece together who I am and what I’m doing. I like your mom, little dude, so be cool. Holding out my hand, I ask him if he can give me five and he does, smacking his sticky palm against mine with a squeal. Then he lunges toward me and begins climbing me like a tree.
‘Max, don’t do that…’ Kylie reaches for him, but I wave her off.
‘He’s fine. Unless you’re not okay with this?’
She opens, then closes her mouth, thinking it over. ‘No, it’s fine. He doesn’t often play with men, so I think this might be good for him. I’m just happy he’s not shy. I’ve been waiting for that stage to hit.’
I look down into giant bright blue eyes. ‘You’re not afraid of me, are you buddy?’
He squeals and slaps a chubby palm against my face. Okay then, that settles that.
I spend the next fifteen minutes flying him like an airplane around the yard, hunting for frogs in the garden and letting him dip his fingers into the pool while I hold onto him.
Kylie watches everything with a neutral expression that makes me wish I knew what she was thinking. And even though she mingles a bit and greets the other guests, her eyes are never far from us.
Once Max tires of me, he reaches for her. ‘Mumma,’ he says in a little gravelly voice.
I place him in her arms, my hands sliding against her bare shoulder as we make the exchange. Her skin is warm and petal soft and her eyes dart up to mine. ‘Thank you.’
‘Anytime,’ I say, sticking my hands into my pockets. Without that wiggly little body in my arms, they feel a bit useless just dangling there at my sides.
The photographer Colton and Sophie hired to capture the memories of their engagement party approaches. ‘Will you three get together for a picture?’
Kylie stiffens, and I see her mouth open like she’s about to refuse the photographer.
‘It’s just a photo,’ I remind her. She’s desperate to refuse anything that could be construed as intimate between us. ‘Please,’ I add.
Kylie settles Max on her hip so they’re both facing the camera and I toss my arm around her shoulder, hugging them both, and smile brightly at the photographer.
She takes a few shots and then lowers her camera. ‘What an adorable baby you two have.’
‘Oh, he’s not…’ I pause, mentally smacking myself. I’d been about to deny him as mine– and he’s not–but I suddenly realize that I wouldn’t mind people thinking he was. I wouldn’t mind someone assuming that this beautiful woman and her baby belong to me.
Kylie’s eyes flash to mine, wondering why I haven’t corrected the woman.
I shrug, lifting an eyebrow to tell her it’s okay. Her brow crinkles and she chews on her lower lip, but doesn’t say anything, instead turning her attention back to Max.
In the distance I see the caterers setting out platters of food at the long banquet table on the patio. ‘Shall we get something to eat?’
‘Sure,’ she says, then makes the sign for eat to Max, which he eagerly imitates.
Chapter Four (#u6248eea7-09ce-53e4-a701-8607ec52f0cb)
Kylie
Pace and I are seated at one of the banquet tables dressed in white linens with Max between us. I’m nervous he’s going to spill something or ruin the tablecloth with his enthusiastic method of eating, but Pace only smiles adoringly at him. It makes me feel unsure and on edge.
I share a plate of food with Max, and he nibbles on grilled salmon, potatoes and cucumber salad like a champ. I’m thankful I don’t have a picky eater. Otherwise, it’d be Cheerios for dinner, because that was all I packed. Of course I also forgot to put on his bib, which meant half of the food was ending up on his shirt. I’ll be changing him into his jammies after this.
Pace looks on, clearly impressed by Max’s ability to shovel fistfuls of food into his mouth. ‘Does he have any teeth in there?’
‘He has four.’
‘How old is he?’ he asks next.
I don’t know what’s up with his sudden interest in my child, or maybe it’s just that he’s trying to be polite and make small talk since he’s stuck sitting next to the lady with the baby. ‘He turned one last month.’
‘So it’s just you and him?’ The depth of Pace’s expression surprises me. There’s usually a crooked grin on his lips, a dimple peeking from one cheek, and a mischievous sparkle in his eyes. Now there’s only a set mouth, strong jawline and deep blue eyes watching me, waiting for my response.
I swallow a lump in my throat. I don’t need anyone. At least that’s what I tell myself. But Max… I feel bad for my son. I hate to think about when he’s older having to explain to him that his own father wanted nothing to do with him. ‘It’s just us,’ I say, my voice going tight. I take a sip of water and exhale deeply. ‘Where’s your girlfriend tonight?’
‘I don’t have a girlfriend.’
‘What about the blonde from the other weekend?’
‘She was a one-time thing.’
‘Classy.’ I raise an eyebrow at him. He’s blunt, but for some reason I like his direct style of communication and the way his eyes never stray from mine. He doesn’t make excuses, doesn’t try to cover up who he is. Or what that night had been – it was a one-time hookup. God, I don’t even remember what that’d be like.
I might be a mom now, but my body still has needs, yearnings…that I promptly ignore. Yes, sir, I shut those feelings down with a vice clamp. They are dangerous and make me want things that just aren’t possible for me right now.
‘I still want to take you to dinner,’ he says, reading my faraway thoughts.
‘We’re having dinner,’ I point out and feed another bite to Max from the end of my fork, hoping to actually get some of the food in his mouth this time.
Pace stares straight ahead, looking out at the ocean, and for the first time, I begin to wonder what he’s thinking, what he sees when he looks at me. He’s a handsome, eligible bachelor. Surely his prospects are better than a single mom so jaded it’d take a miracle for me to trust again. Though I have to admit, there is something in me that loved seeing him with Max. His big hands that curled all the way around Max’s belly and ribcage, the gentle way he flew him through the air while Max giggled…Max deserves more moments like that. The rational side of my brain knows that, but I won’t have him feel the loss and rejection when Pace decides a blond with inflatable breasts is more fun than a twenty-nine year old single mom and her son. And he was guaranteed to.
Men like him don’t change overnight. I need to keep my feet firmly on the ground and my head out of the clouds, no matter how freaking cute he is.
After dinner, I change Max into his pajamas, we brush all four of his teeth and I read him the two books I’d packed. I know he’s tired because he’s tugging on his ears through the second book. It’s his tell. A clear signal that he’s ready to be laid down and won’t get up again until morning. And it’s a good thing too, because after twelve hours of playing and lifting him and carrying him my back is aching and I just want to sit down and relax for a minute or two before we have to drive home.
I spot Sophie and Colton by the outdoor fireplace.
‘Hey guys.’ I lean in and give each of them a hug. ‘Great party. Thank you for having us.’ I feel bad that I haven’t spent any time with the hosts yet, but chasing a one-year-old around keeps you busy.
Sophie’s mouth curls in a smile. It’s so good to see her happy. ‘You look gorgeous tonight.’
I chuckle, realizing she usually only sees me dressed for work. And since I work at home, my ensemble usually consists of a pair of faded yoga pants and a stretched out t-shirt.
If I’m being honest, the only reason I took the extra time and care getting ready – wearing a sundress, curling my hair – was because I knew I’d see Pace again. It’s stupid, and I brush off her compliment.
‘Max is sleeping in your den. Hope that’s okay,’ I say.
‘Absolutely,’ Colton says. ‘You could have put him upstairs in a bed, you know?’
I wave him off. ‘He’s fine. But thank you.’
‘Looks like he had fun with Pace today,’ Colton remarks, watching me closely to see my reaction. Colton and his brother are really quite different. Where Colton is intense, calculated and exacting in everything he does, Pace is open and easy going and puts a smile on your face, despite your best efforts to hate him.
I want to drill him for information, ask him what is up with Pace’s attention toward me and my son, but I don’t want to appear to be overly interested. ‘Just a couple more days until you guys set off, right?’ I ask.
Colton wraps his arms around Sophie’s middle and tugs her back against him. ‘It’ll be Sophie’s first time in Africa. The first of many, hopefully. I’m anxious to see all the progress from my visit there two years ago.’
Colton and I discuss the logistics of their trip, while Sophie peppers us with questions of her own. They’ve each been receiving the necessary vaccinations before their travel, and have their passports and travel visas ready. They’ll be gone for three weeks. I’ll miss seeing Sophie on the days she works with me.
‘I wish you could come, Kylie,’ Sophie says. ‘Would your nanny stay with Max?’
I shrug. ‘She probably would if I asked her, but I don’t think I could handle being separated from Max for so long.’ He is my heart.
She nods like she understands. But I don’t think she truly does. She will when she’s a mother.
Pace wanders over in bare feet, his white shirtsleeves are pushed up, showing off tan and muscular forearms sprinkled with light hair. He’s dangling a bottle of beer from one hand and grinning at me.
‘Where’s your mini?’ he asks, looking directly at me.
My belly tightens. ‘He’s all partied-out.’
‘Excuse us,’ Colton says. ‘We’ve got to go say goodnight to Dad. He’s still operating on the eastern time zone.’ He leads Sophie away and I’m, once again, alone with Pace. I’m not sure why I feel so out of my element when I’m near him. It’s probably because I don’t understand his motivations, I decide.
‘Care to join me by the water?’ he asks.
‘Sure.’ He leads me toward the beach. And even though my brain is screaming at me to say no, my feet carry me down toward the water, following closely behind him.
Pace
I lead Kylie to a secluded spot on the beach. After seeing her with the little koala bear she’s had attached to her hip or by her side all afternoon, it’s like part of her is missing. There’s something I don’t like about it.
‘This okay?’ I ask, indicating a dry spot in the sand where the tall grasses shield some of the wind blowing in off the water.
‘Fine,’ she says, lowering herself down. ‘The monitor should still work out here.’ Kylie crosses her legs and folds her hands in her lap.
I sink down beside her. The sand is warm and sugar soft. The gentle sounds of the low rolling waves and moonlight gleaming down on us make a romantic backdrop. If she were any other woman, I would have her down on her knees by now with my cock deep in her throat. To be honest, I’m a bit at a loss right now, unsure what to do or say next. It’s an interesting change for me.
‘Did you enjoy yourself tonight?’ I ask.
‘Max had fun, so that was good.’
It wasn’t what I’d asked her, but I let it go.
When she talks about her son, her eyes light up and her mouth curves into a silly grin. It’s actually quite adorable. She’s a far cry from the women in my past. For one, she’s not all over me, and two, she’s mostly quiet and contemplative as she looks out at the water. She feels no need to fill the silence with nonsense jabber. It’s refreshing.
She’s never fake, never tries to impress me, she’s just comfortable in her own skin and that makes the man inside me take notice.
From the corner of my vision, I watch the breeze lift the stray pieces of hair that have escaped her ponytail. They flutter around her neck and cheeks while Kylie looks straight ahead, watching the waves. I’m certain she has no idea how beautiful she is with her minimal makeup and no-fuss style. I was noticing things I never took the time to notice before, like the delicate scent hanging around her, and how soft and smooth her skin looks.
When you fuck a woman in the bathroom of a nightclub, there’s no reason to take her out again. Where’s the chase? The mystery? I liked to get a little crazy now and then, but I still believed a woman should behave like a woman. Kylie is every bit poised and put together with a shit ton of mystery and enough depth to make me want to give chase.
In Los Angeles her modesty is refreshing. She would be the type of woman to age gracefully. No injections or fillers or skin pulled too tight around her eyes. She’d still be beautiful at sixty. I could see it now. Long silver hair, the same cheeky gleam in her green eyes, as she pushed up on her toes to kiss her grown son on the cheek.
‘I should go. It’s late, and…’
Hell, I can’t let her walk away yet. ‘Max’s asleep inside, right?’
She looks down at the baby monitor in her hands. ‘Yes, but…’
‘You could stay for a little while longer, couldn’t you?’
She looks like she wants to say no, but then at the last minute, she surprises me. ‘I suppose so.’
‘I know you said you’re not much of a drinker, but could I get you anything…water? Soda?’
‘No, I’m fine. You didn’t have to hang around us all night, Max and I, I mean,’ she says.
‘I wanted to, Kylie.’
She swallows and glances up at my eyes, trying to read if I’m feeding her a line. ‘Pace, I’ve worked for Colton for over a year now. He’s told me a few stories about his younger brother. I know this isn’t you. You’re not the guy who’s looking to settle down with a single mom. You said so yourself at the gala.’
‘Then what kind of guy am I, Kylie?’
Her brilliant emerald gaze flashes on mine, looking dark and dangerous. ‘You’re the guy who drops panties and breaks hearts and does it all with a sultry grin. I’ve heard the stories. They’re a bit wild.’ She winks.
I’m going to fucking kill Colton. I don’t care that it’s his engagement party. He’s a dead man. Shit, I realize I can’t do that to Sophie. I’ll just have to come up with some type of plan B to make him pay.
‘Unless you have some type of mommy dearest issue you need to explore?’ she raises a brow.
Her joke is off color, but she doesn’t know it. ‘I lost my mother when I was nine.’
‘Oh, God, I didn’t know. I’m so sorry.’ Her hands flies to her chest and stays there while she watches me.
‘It’s okay. You didn’t know.’
‘I’m sorry. Colton never mentioned it.’ Her tone is tender and caring.
I shrug. I’m not surprised. ‘It’s not something we like to discuss.’
As we sit here together in the company of the endless blue ocean, I can’t help but wonder if my interest in Kylie has anything to do with the fact that I do see her as a mother. Her softness, the love I see pouring out of her in every interaction with Max – maybe those are things that attract me to her. Her warmth, her devotion – they are all part of what makes her beautiful. It doesn’t take a psychiatrist to find the link here. But it isn’t something I care to dwell on.
Beside me, Kylie cups handfuls of sand and lets them drift through her parted fingers like a sieve.
‘Can I ask you something?’ I ask.
She nods.
‘What happened to Max’s father?’ It’s something I’ve wondered about since the first time I met her, but I’m only brave enough to ask now, in the cover of night, and once she’s already stumbled over the death of my mother.
She pauses her motions, letting the sand fall from her hands, then dusts them off. ‘Have you ever been in love, Pace?’ she surprises me by asking.
‘No.’
‘Never?’
‘Nope.’ I’m hopeful that it’ll happen someday, I just haven’t gotten there yet. I’ve been too busy building my career and sleeping my way through the LA singles scene.
‘It’s a scary thing – handing your heart over like that. Giving someone the very best pieces of yourself.’ Her eyes are far away and she remains staring out at the water as she speaks. ‘I met Max’s father, Elan, when I first moved to Los Angeles a few years ago. He was quite a bit older than me, thirty-six at the time, already settled and successful. I didn’t know anyone in the city, and he seemed like a safe choice. We dated for about six months, and even though we never talked about our future in the terms of marriage and children, I felt like we were building toward something real and long-lasting. We stayed together every weekend, at either his place or mine. And even though we were careful – I was on birth control at the time – somehow, I got pregnant. I guess they’re serious with those fine print warnings about no birth control method being one-hundred percent effective. I just never thought anything like that would happen to me.’
The urge to reach over and take her hand in mine is nearly overwhelming. I fist my hands in my lap instead and wait for Kylie to continue.
‘I was scared when I found out – mostly because it was so unexpected. I was just getting my career off the ground, and my relationship with Elan was still pretty new. I never thought I had to worry about being a single mom, though. I wasn’t scared to tell Elan. He’d never been anything other than loving and kind toward me.’ Kylie’s tone tightens at the end, like she has something stuck in her throat.
I hate the direction this story is headed and I hate myself even more for asking and making her relive all these bitter memories. I want to kick myself in the balls for my curiosity.
‘I called him over to the apartment I lived in at the time, I didn’t want to tell him over the phone. He came over, playful and curious about what it was that I wanted to say. But the moment the words, ‘I’m pregnant’ left my lips, all playfulness evaporated. His entire demeanor changed. The kind side of him disappeared and was replaced with a man who was suddenly all business. He wanted to know when, how and what I planned to do about it. It took me several moments to understand he wasn’t using the word we. He was asking about what I planned to do. I was on my own from that point forward, it was just me and the little life growing inside of me. I felt sick and hollow. He had put this baby inside me and now he suddenly wanted nothing to do with us. It was a harrowing feeling.’
Kylie’s quiet for a moment and there’s no way in hell I’m probing any further, but I can tell this story is far from over. And I have a feeling it’s going to get even more heart-wrenching before it gets better.
‘Elan stopped calling, he stopped responding to my texts and emails. He cut all ties. When I was about six months pregnant, I ran into him at the drug store one night. I had a massive craving for ice cream and ventured out in my maternity pajamas to pick some up. I still cringe thinking about what I must have looked like to him.’ She shudders and buries her face in her hands.
Picturing her with a firm, round belly, I see nothing she should feel ashamed about. She’s a gorgeous woman – and while I’m not typically attracted to pregnant women, Kylie with a baby growing inside of her makes my mouth curl into a dopey grin.
‘I saw him and some young blonde piece of arm candy,’ she continues. ‘They were buying condoms at the checkout counter. His eyes slid from mine down to my rounded belly and back up again. He made some comment to the sales clerk about using condoms, even when a woman claims to be on birth control. And then he was gone. I hated myself for trusting him with my heart. I hated myself for still missing him. But the most painful thing of all came a few weeks later. His assistant delivered a check for fifty grand and the note inside said that he didn’t want to be bothered with making weekly child support payments, and that I should use the money to start a college savings fund. Which, of course, I did – for Max’s sake – even though I hated accepting that money from him. I’ve had no other contact with him,’ she finishes.
‘What about when Max was born?’ I can’t understand a man who would just walk away from his woman and child – especially this woman. She is so strong and independent and stunningly beautiful.
‘Nothing,’ she says. ‘When I went into labor, I called a cab, took myself to the hospital and had the baby.’
‘What about your family?’ I ask. Surely she has someone to count on when she needs it.
She shrugs. ‘My parents divorced when I was little. I don’t have much of a relationship with my dad and my mom is…well, she’s always been more preoccupied with living her own life than participating in mine.’
‘What’s Elan’s last name?’ I ask.
‘Why?’ she looks up to meet my eyes.
‘I want to kick his fucking ass, that’s why.’ My chest feels tight and my knuckles are itching to be busted over something – preferably his face.
‘It’s okay, Pace. I’m over Elan now. Completely. The only thing that still makes my heart hurt is knowing that one day I’ll have to answer questions from Max about why his own father wanted nothing to do with him.’
‘I’m sorry I pried into all of this. I know it’s none of my business.’ I feel like a grade-A asshole.
‘It’s okay,’ she says, digging her bare toes into the warm sand, her sandals long ago kicked aside. ‘It’s taught me that I need to be better at picking men. A beautiful man with a smooth tongue who says all the right things doesn’t excite me anymore.’
She’s letting me inside, and I appreciate the glimpse at her inner thoughts. Turning to face her, I ask, ‘What does excite you?’
‘A man who is kind to my child.’
Her answer is so poised, so simple; I can tell she means it entirely.
I wonder if that’s how she views me. I hope so. I genuinely enjoyed playing with Max today and I hope she doesn’t think I did it just to try and get into her panties. Which is what she probably expects, based on the stories she’s heard from Colt. That shithead. My resolve to kick his ass is back again, full force.
‘At the point I’m at, actions speak louder than words,’ she says. ‘I should probably go, I’ve said too much, I’m sure.’
‘Don’t go. Not yet.’ I’m laying myself bare, so much more so than I ever do. My game is completely fucking shot, and I don’t care.
‘This isn’t what my life is like, Pace. It’s not all backyard barbecues where there are lots of helping hands, or fancy galas downtown.’
‘I get that, Kylie. You have responsibilities. I see that.’
‘It’s hard work, Pace, and it’s a twenty-four seven job. No sick days. No time off. And I know you’ll say it doesn’t matter – but it does. You’re a Drake. I’ve seen the lives you guys lead. It’s champagne and caviar and designer everything.’
She has no way of knowing, but I’m not really like my brothers in that regard. I live in a simple two-bedroom condo, not a mansion on the beach like Colton and Collins each do. ‘A man gets tired of champagne and caviar after a while,’ I say, trying to make light of her jab.
‘So you want to slum it for a while?’
‘You are not slumming it. Max is not slumming it.’
Her eyes flash on mine and I can tell that my words have touched something inside of her. ‘No, but we’re not what you’re used to.’
‘Maybe I’m tired of the same old–same old.’ I look her straight in the eyes as I say this, letting my meaning sink in.
She matches my serious gaze with one of her own. ‘And what about when you get tired of us? I can’t have my son getting attached, only to have you disappear one day when you decide you’re done playing house.’
Damn. She’s better at this verbal sparring than me, and I fucking hate it.
‘I still want to take you to dinner,’ I say.
‘I appreciate it, but I’m just not ready for anything like that.’ Kylie rises to her feet, and heads for the house. ‘Goodnight Pace.’
Fuck.
We’d had a great night and just when we’d finally started to make some progress, she completely shot me down. I was tired of being told that I wasn’t mature enough to handle the responsibility of dating a woman with a child. I wanted a fair chance. But as I watched her walk away, the defeated set to her shoulders, I realized she didn’t want to be right about me. She just expected me to let her down.
‘Kylie, wait up,’ I call, hopping to my feet and sprinting after her. I catch her on the patio where she’s stuffing their things into a bag. Stray toys, a sippy cup and a baggie of cereal are all scattered at her feet. She lifts her chin and her eyes find mine. Confusion washes over her features. ‘Let me help you get Max to the car,’ I explain.
She doesn’t respond. She just gazes up at me. But since she didn’t refuse, I reach down and take the bag from her, adding the stray items and zipping it up. ‘I got this.’
She watches me with mild curiosity, her pretty green eyes wide, like she’s taking it all in, trying to dissect what I’m doing when she just shot me down a mere thirty seconds ago. Hell, I don’t even know. I’m just following my instincts. I’m not trying to impress her or play some game, and it’s incredibly refreshing.
Kylie’s quiet as we head into the house. I’m not sure where Max is sleeping, but she leads me into the den. It’s dark and silent, except for the little breathy sounds coming from the sleeping infant. He’s on the floor on some type of sleeping mat. We stand over him for just a second, watching him. His mouth lifts in his sleep, and I suddenly find myself wondering what he could be dreaming about. Probably his pretty momma. A thought that warms me.
‘May I?’ I whisper.
She nods and takes the bag from me. I bend down and ever so gently lift the little guy from the floor. I bring him up to my chest, holding him close. He opens one eye, checking to see who’s got him, and then drops his head to my shoulder, where it rests all the way to the car. His limp little body molds to mine, and I can feel his hot breath against my neck. Smiling, I give his back a gentle pat, careful not to wake him.
Kylie watches everything, then opens the door to the backseat and I place him in his car-seat while she leans over me and buckles him in. The scent of vanilla and delicate feminine skin wafts up to greet me. The scent awakens something in me. Perhaps it was watching her with her baby all afternoon, seeing her as a mother, and now experiencing the softness of her as a woman that stirs something in me. Compared to the one-dimensional women I usually date, it’s a welcome reprieve.
Standing in the driveway with the moonlight pouring down on us, neither of us says a word. Kylie closes the car door and we both check through the window to see if the sound woke Max. It didn’t.
‘I could have gotten him,’ she says, turning to me.
‘I know.’
She watches me intently, as if trying to figure out my angle. It’s the same look she gave me when I took Max from her earlier to show him the frog I had found in the garden.
‘Drive safe,’ I tell her.
‘I will.’ Without another word, she slips into the driver’s seat.
I remain rooted in the driveway until she pulls away and I can no longer see her taillights. It hasn’t even been two minutes, and I’m already plotting out ways to see her again.
Inside I find Sophie stationed at the kitchen island, her mouth stuffed full of a bite of cake.
I grin when I spot her and her eyes widen like she’s been caught.
‘Don’t look at me like that,’ she says, licking the frosting from her thumb. ‘I barely got to eat with all the mingling and talking.’
Holding up my hands, I motion for her to continue. ‘Don’t stop on my account.’ I grab a slice of the cake with my fingers. ‘Here, I’ll even join you. Cheers.’
‘Cheers.’ She touches the edge of her cake to mine and we eat in silence, enjoying the comfortable moment between us. Sophie already feels like family, so much more so than Colton’s ex. That was one woman I couldn’t stand being near. Sophie, I wouldn’t mind cloning. That thought instantly makes me sad. She had a twin sister that she lost. I can still see a touch of sadness in her eyes, but considering everything, she’s doing great.
We eat, moving on to the appetizer trays containing cheese puffs and crab rolls, while Sophie tells me stories of all the extended relatives and friends of the family she met tonight.
‘I need your opinion on something,’ I say, wiping my hands on a cloth napkin.
‘Wow, Pace needs me for something…I feel honored,’ she says, grinning at me. ‘What is it?’
‘There’s a woman I’m interested in,’ I start.
Footsteps behind me cause me to turn. It’s Colton, looking for his bride-to-be, no doubt.
‘As long as it’s not Kylie, go to town,’ he says.
I hiss out a breath. ‘I like her, dude. What’s your problem?’ I’d intended to have a calm, rational conversation with Sophie. I already know my brother’s views on this, and it pisses me off.
‘She’s a single mom,’ Colton says, like I don’t know this fact.
‘I’m well aware. Do you think I missed the mini-human who was attached to her hip all night?’ I actually viewed him as a sort of bonus.
Sophie’s watching all of this, her eyes whipping back and forth between us as she struggles to catch up. ‘Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad, Colton,’ she says, placing her hand on his arm. ‘Pace is a nice guy. Kylie’s a sweet girl.’
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Кендалл Райан
Тип: электронная книга
Жанр: Эротические романы
Язык: на английском языке
Издательство: HarperCollins
Дата публикации: 16.04.2024
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О книге: ***Warning – 18+ contains explicit sexual situations and language*** from the author of Filthy Beautiful Lies and Filthy Beautiful Love.‘Tell me what you need,’ I ask, lacing my fingers with hers. The simple act of holding her hand makes my blood pump faster.‘I need you to be careful with me and Max,’ she whispers.Pace Drake loves sex, and he makes no apology for getting what he wants, when he wants it. But when he meets, Kylie Sloan, he’s enthralled by her and begins to question his standard operating procedure. Kylie’s depth and determination make the hookups that fill his weekends seem empty and shallow. She doesn’t want or need anyone to take care of her and that only makes him want to care for her more.Kylie’s trust in men has vanished. The last man she was with played ding-dong-ditch-it with her uterus and now the infant son he left her to raise alone is the only man she has time for. Pace wants to prove to her that he is one of the good guys, but can she really trust that his days of hitting it and quitting it are gone forever?