The Color of Courage
Patricia Davids
Only faith sustained Lindsey Mandel after the loss of her beloved twin brother.Now a freak accident would test the U.S. Army corporal's mettle once again. Desperate to save her brother's injured horse, Lindsey placed her trust in handsome veterinarian Brian Cutter. When Brian saw Lindsey pinned beneath the steed, his only thought was to save her.With his own faith shaken by the death of his wife, he was amazed by this plucky female soldier who gave her all personally and professionally. Inspired by Lindsey's commitment to kin and country, Brian soon found a love that made him feel truly blessed.
The Color of Courage
Patricia Davids
Published by Steeple Hill Books
To Joshua. You’re the best grandson in the world,
honey. Now get those grades up!
And to all the men and women serving
in the United States military. Please accept
my thanks and my humble gratitude.
Contents
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Prologue
“Lindsey…I need you…to do this.”
Standing beside her brother’s hospital bed, Sergeant Lindsey Mandel fought back tears. She held his hand though she knew he couldn’t feel it. “Danny, what if it doesn’t work out?”
“You’ll make it work…I know you will.” He spoke quickly because he could only talk when the ventilator keeping him alive breathed out.
She brushed her hand over his close-shaven head. He was six years older than she was, thirty-one to her twenty-five. Today, he looked decades older than when she had seen him three months ago. “Don’t give up, Danny. You can still get better.”
A wry smile twisted his lips. “Who are you…kidding?” What might have been a chuckle turned into a cough and an alarm sounded from the monitor above his bed.
Frightened, Lindsey glanced to Danny’s wife, Abigail, sitting on the other side of the bed. Behind her, the door to the room opened and a nurse in green scrubs looked in. The beeping stopped and Abigail waved the woman away. “It’s all right. He just needs to stop talking for a while.”
Admiring her sister-in-law’s calm, Lindsey willed herself to relax. Abigail rose, moved to Lindsey’s side and asked, “Why don’t we go grab a cup of coffee?”
“Good idea…. Get her…out of here…for a while.”
Abigail leaned down and kissed his forehead. “You just want us to leave so you can flirt with the cute nurses.”
“Rats…you found…me out.” He closed his eyes.
Lindsey leaned down to kiss him, too. “I’ll be back,” she promised.
He nodded, but his eyes remained closed. He looked so weary. When she turned to go, she heard him say, “I’m proud of you…First Sergeant…Mandel.”
A heavy band of emotion squeezed her heart. “I’m proud of you, too, Master Sergeant Mandel.”
“Don’t spend…your whole leave…in this hospital.”
“I’ll spend my leave anywhere I choose,” she retorted.
A fleeting smile crossed his face. “Headstrong… as ever.”
“Because you raised me that way. Stop talking and rest.”
Outside of his room, Lindsey paused as several men in uniform walked past, pushing others in wheelchairs. Everywhere she looked, the halls of Walter Reed hospital bustled with activity. Walking silently beside Abigail to a small waiting room, Lindsey waited until her sister-in-law filled two cups from the vending machine. Dressed in a pair of rumpled beige slacks and a wrinkled mauve shirt with her dark hair pulled back haphazardly into a silver clip, Abigail looked worn to the bone.
“The coffee isn’t good, but I’ve had worse.” She handed one to Lindsey.
Lindsey stirred a packet of creamer into the piping brew. “I can’t believe Danny wants me to take Dakota away. He loves that horse. He’s given up, hasn’t he?”
Initially, her brother’s will to live in spite of his injuries had helped Lindsey cope, but the unfairness of it all weighed on her.
Abigail gestured toward the red vinyl chairs lining the wall. “Why don’t we sit down. I don’t think he has given up. He’s just coming to terms with the reality of the situation. The shrapnel severed his spine. He’s a quadriplegic. After three months of therapy, he knows he isn’t going to get much better.”
“But there’s still hope.”
“The doctors think, with work, he’ll be able to breathe on his own, but he’ll never ride again. Yes, he loves that horse. That’s why he wants you to take Dakota back to Fort Riley with you.”
“Danny has lost so much already. It doesn’t seem right to take Dakota away, too.”
“Look around you, Lindsey. Most of the men and women who are patients here were wounded in action. Do you know what the majority of them say they want? To stay in the service. To get back to their units. Danny knows he can never go back, but he needs to do something positive. He feels he can do that by donating Dakota to your unit. You have no idea how excited he was when he heard about your transfer into the mounted color guard last year.”
“Danny tried to transfer into the Third Infantry a number of times. The Old Guard has a mounted unit. Why not donate Dakota to them? That way Dakota would still be in Washington, D.C., and Danny could go and see him when he’s better.”
“I thought about that, but the Old Guard only takes black, gray or white horses. Your unit takes bays.”
Brown horses with black manes and tails and minimal white markings were the traditional mounts of the Seventh Cavalry, the regiment Lindsey’s unit portrayed at Fort Riley, Kansas. Dakota wouldn’t be excluded for that reason, but less than half of the horses brought to the fort passed the intensive training requirements.
“What if he isn’t suitable for us? Then what?”
“He’s just got to be, Lindsey. Please, make this work. It would mean so much to Danny. He desperately needs something to look forward to, or else—or else I’m afraid to think about what could happen.”
Chapter One
Leaning forward in the saddle, Lindsey patted Dakota’s neck and tried to quell her nervousness. “This is it, boy. This is your final test. You have to get this right.”
The dark brown gelding responded by tossing his head and pulling at the reins as if to show her that he was eager to get down to business. She couldn’t help but smile.
Running a hand down her mount’s sleek, muscular neck, she found the calmness she needed. She drew a deep, cleansing breath. The cool breeze carried the smell of dust, fallen leaves and the earthy scent of horses. Looking over the fence to the hills rising just beyond the road, she saw the golden-hued stone buildings of old Fort Riley where they stood nestled between oaks, elms and sycamores bearing the first touches of fall colors. Dakota pulled impatiently at the reins again.
“Okay, I’m the one stalling,” she admitted. “I just want this so badly—for you and me, but mostly for Danny.”
Each week her brother called for updates about Dakota’s training, offering advice and pointers that she didn’t really need but accepted anyway. Today, he would be waiting impatiently for her call. She intended to give him good news.
Reaching down, she checked that her saber and rifle would slide easily out of their scabbard and boot. The reproduction models of the 1860s U.S. Cavalry equipment were spotless after her careful preparations that morning. Even the brass buttons of her blue wool cavalry jacket gleamed brightly in the late-morning sun. She was as ready as she could get.
Be with us today, Lord, for Danny’s sake.
At the touch of her heels, Dakota bounded forward. Together, they sailed over a series of low jumps, then slid to a halt and whirled back at the end of the field. On the return run, Lindsey drew her saber and headed into a series of poles topped with red and white balloons. As Dakota wove in and out, she slashed left and right, breaking as many as she could. He didn’t even flinch at the loud pops or the swish of the sword cutting close beside him.
Four men on horseback waited for her at the end of the course. She slowed to a trot. Each man drew his saber and held it over his head with the tip pointing backward. One by one she struck their swords with her own as she passed close behind them, making the steel weapons ring with bell-like tones.
Sheathing her saber, she drew her pistols. Digging her heels into her mount’s sides, she headed into the jumps again, this time blasting the balloons with her revolvers. Dakota raced on without faltering until they cleared the last hurdle. Only one maneuver remained.
Holstering her guns, she pulled the horse to a sliding stop and dismounted. Drawing her carbine rifle from its boot, she gave a low command, lifted Dakota’s foreleg and pulled his head around. “Throwing the Horse” was the hardest movement for the young gelding to perform. Many horses refused the command.
To her relief, Dakota knelt, then lay down and rolled onto his side without hesitation.
“Stay down,” she ordered. Stretching out behind his back, Lindsey rested her rifle on his shoulder and fired off three rounds. They were only blanks, but the sharp reports were as loud as if they had been real bullets. Dakota jerked slightly at the sound of the first discharge, but remained quietly on his side, providing lifesaving cover for his rider as cavalry horses have been trained to do through the ages.
As the echoes of the last shot died away, Lindsey rose to her feet and gave the command to stand. After scrambling to his feet, Dakota shook himself and waited patiently for her to remount. She wanted to throw her arms around his neck and hug him, but not now, not yet.
“Good boy, you were perfect. Just perfect,” she murmured as she swung up into the saddle. She knew she was grinning like a fool, but she couldn’t help it. After only three months of training, Dakota had proved himself worthy of a place in the elite Commanding General’s Mounted Color Guard at Fort Riley. Danny would be so proud.
She returned to the end of the field, where other members of her unit sat on their horses. Beside the men, Captain Jeffery Watson, her unit commander, stood with his arms crossed and a faint frown on his face. Stopping in front of him, Lindsey saluted smartly.
“Well done, Sergeant Mandel.”
“Thank you, sir.”
The other men in her unit gathered around. “You looked fine out there.” Private Avery Barnes was the next to offer his opinion. The dark-haired Boston native pushed his cap back to smile at her with a roguish grin.
“She always looks good. It was Dakota who looked great,” drawled Corporal Shane Ross as he leaned over and patted the horse’s neck. It was no secret the tall blond Texan was fond of all the four-legged members of the unit. He took as much pride in their skill as he did in the abilities of the horses’ human partners.
“So, does this mean Dakota is in?” the third soldier queried. Private Lee Gillis, the newest enlisted member of the mounted color guard was watching their captain closely.
Captain Watson reached out to rub Dakota’s cheek. “I will admit that I was worried when I learned that Dakota belonged to your brother, Sergeant.”
Lindsey gave him a puzzled look. “May I ask why?”
“The last thing I wanted to do was to tell a wounded veteran that his horse wasn’t suitable for our unit. Thanks to your hard work, I won’t have to do that. I think Dakota makes a fine addition to our stable.”
She nearly melted with relief as the men around her grinned and offered their congratulations. “Thank you, sir. I know I speak for my brother when I say that it is an honor to have Dakota accepted.”
Crossing his arms again, the captain allowed a smile to soften his stern features. “As the icing on this cake, I wanted you all to know that I just received word from the Joint Task Force-Armed Forces Inaugural Committee that the Commanding General’s Mounted Color Guard had been invited to participate in the upcoming Presidential Inauguration parade.”
A cheer of excitement went up from the men. Lindsey grinned at their enthusiasm, “That’s wonderful news, sir. Will Dakota be going, too?”
“Dakota has earned his place. And, of course, as the highest ranking non-commissioned officer, you will be the U.S. flag bearer for our unit. I’m sure you’ll want to ride Dakota for that, but if you prefer another mount, I’ll understand.”
“Oh, no, I’ll be riding Dakota.” Wait until she told Danny. He would burst his buttons with pride.
“I’ve decided to include Dakota in Saturday’s performance. Can he handle the crowd at a Kansas State football game?”
“I know he can, sir.”
“Good. That will be all, Sergeant. Dismiss the detail.” Captain Watson stepped back from the horses.
Lindsey saluted, dismissed the men and then let the overwhelming happiness sink in. Being asked to participate in the Inaugural parade was an incredible honor. She might be the one bearing the flag, but she would be carrying it for her brother. Giddy with delight, she headed for the stables. This was one phone call she couldn’t wait to make.
Early Saturday afternoon, Brian Cutter walked along the edge of the Kansas State University football field in Manhattan, Kansas, leaning heavily on his cane. Halftime activities for the first home game of the year were well underway. The energetic shouts of cheerleaders dressed in purple and white, the noise from thousands of fans and the blare of the band was almost deafening. But Brian had his eye on a group of halftime performers who seemed unfazed by the clamor.
Beneath the goalposts at the north end of the field, six horses stood quietly waiting for their riders. The matching bays all sported dark blue blankets and McClellan Cavalry saddles.
He had watched them being unloaded behind the stadium and something in the third horse’s gait had caught his attention. The gelding’s walk wasn’t quite right. Maybe it was nothing more than a bruise from the trailer ride, but he wanted to make sure the horse’s rider was aware of what he’d seen. Until the horse was examined, it shouldn’t be ridden.
The riders were out now and preparing to mount. Brian tried to hurry, but his bad leg was aching again. He didn’t need a weatherman to tell him a cold front was moving in. Sharp pain shot through his hip and forced him to rely more heavily on his cane, making him feel much older than his thirty-two years. He arrived at the temporary picket line just as a young woman dressed in Civil War military garb was checking her saddle and girth.
“Excuse me, miss. I need a word with you.” Brian knew he sounded curt and short of breath. She turned her attention on him and whatever he had intended to say flew out of his mind the way a yearling bolts out the barn door and into a summertime pasture.
She was a stunning woman. Even dressed in men’s clothing did little to hide her feminine figure. The round, flat-topped soldier’s cap with its short bill sat atop a mass of thick, auburn curls, but it was her eyes that captured his attention. An unusual color of silver green, they reminded him of the springtime quaking aspen near his Montana childhood home. A sprinkling of freckles dusted her cheeks and nose. Her lips were full and parted in a sweet smile.
“Yes?” she prompted. Something in her wide smile reminded him of Emily.
He pushed the ridiculous idea aside. His deceased wife and this woman didn’t look alike at all.
The female soldier glanced to where the other members of the group were forming up. “You said you needed a word with me? I’m about to go on. Can you make it quick?” Her tone was polite but dismissive. He found himself irritated with her attitude.
“Your horse is lame. You shouldn’t be riding him until someone looks at his right front leg.”
She frowned, as if deciding whether or not to take him seriously. “Dakota seems fine to me.”
To her credit, she walked around the animal and ran her hand down the horse’s leg, then led him a few steps to observe him before giving Brian a frosty smile. “I don’t see a problem.”
“I saw it when he got off the trailer.”
She swung up into the saddle with ease. Looking down at him, she managed a smile that wasn’t quite polite. “We just finished a fifteen-minute warm-up. He’s fine, honest. I’m sorry, but my men are waiting on me.”
“You’re doing the animal a disservice. You should pull him out of this exhibition until he can be examined.”
“Thank you for your concern, but I know this horse better than anyone. If he were having trouble, I’d be the first to notice.”
He stepped forward and laid a hand on the horse’s bridle. “I’m a vet. I get paid to notice when an animal isn’t moving right.”
From the corner of her eye, Lindsey saw that several of the support men from her unit who weren’t riding had begun to move toward her. If this guy didn’t back off, he might find himself in a lot of trouble. A scene was the last thing she wanted. A big part of the CGMCG’s mission was public relations.
“That may be true, but you aren’t our vet. Thank you for your concern. Excuse me, I have to go.”
“Suit yourself, but you’ll only make him more lame. When he’s limping tomorrow, remember that I told you so.” He stepped aside to let her ride out and join her group.
Lindsey cast a look back at the rude man who seemed to think he had some say in what she did. He was a little above medium height and slender, but not skinny. His gray eyes were piercing and a perfect match to the leaden sky overhead. Nicely dressed in a gray tweed sport coat over a blue button-down oxford shirt and gray slacks, he wasn’t a bad-looking guy. She might even have said he was kind of cute except for his personality. Arrogant wasn’t a strong enough word to describe him.
Dismissing the man’s brusque words, Lindsey forced herself to concentrate as the unit lined up for their first maneuver. Today they would begin the exhibition by riding two by two and taking four low hurdles as a column while their bugler blew “To the Gallop.” It was a sure crowd-pleaser.
Lindsey patted Dakota’s neck while they waited. They were the first horse and rider in a line of three. During his warm-up, he hadn’t seemed as eager as usual, but they had been training hard the past few days and they were both tired. Still, he certainly hadn’t been favoring either front leg.
“We’ll take a few days’ rest after today, fella. How does that sound?”
Actually, it sounded like a really good idea. She hadn’t realized how tired she was until her conversation with the grumpy guy.
She glanced back once more. He was watching her from the picket line. The wind blew his shaggy blond hair this way and that. The frown on his face made him look intimidating. He was rubbing his right thigh until he saw her looking. He stopped and straightened. Still scowling, he walked down the sidelines in front of the stands. She couldn’t help wondering why he needed the cane. Was it a recent injury?
Perhaps the last woman he had tried to bully had kicked him in the shin. The image made Lindsey smile until she realized how unkind it was. The man had only been trying to help.
Beside them, the bugle sounded and Lindsey leaned forward as they began at a walk, then advanced to a trot and then into a gallop down the football field. Making a turn in tight formation, the horses thundered toward a row of jumps set up on the fifty yard line. As they approached the first obstacle, she felt Dakota hesitate then jump off stride. With another horse close behind them, there was no room for error.
Something was wrong. Before she could pull out of line they were on the second jump. Dakota launched forward, and she relaxed. This jump was good. He was fine.
Only he wasn’t. His knees buckled when his front feet hit the ground. He fell, catapulting her forward. Lindsey threw out her arms and tried to kick free of the stirrups. She had an instant to breathe a prayer for help before she felt the impact of her body hitting the ground, followed by Dakota’s weight rolling over her.
Chapter Two
Brian watched in horror as the woman and her horse went down directly in front of him. The next rider was so close behind that he couldn’t turn aside and his horse fell on top of the downed pair. In a split second the precision-riding exhibition had turned into a melee.
Brian hurried toward the pileup even as the other members of the team leaped from their horses to race toward their fallen comrades. One horse scrambled to his feet and limped a few feet away. His rider sat on the ground looking dazed, with blood oozing from a cut on his forehead. The first horse that had gone down was struggling to rise but couldn’t gain his feet because the rails and the pillar of the jump were tangled with his legs.
Brian didn’t see the woman until he reached the horse’s head, but he heard her bloodcurdling scream. She was lying facedown with her right arm pinned beneath her mount. He grabbed the horse’s bridle and spoke softly. “Easy boy. Miss, lie still.”
She dug the fingers of her free hand into the thick turf. “Get…him…off!”
Each word sounded as if it was being torn from her throat by unbearable pain.
Brian sank to one knee, his stiff leg stretched awkwardly out in front of him and pulled the frightened horse’s head into his lap. He knew the animal’s struggles could inflict more injury on the trapped rider. He stroked the gelding’s cheek until he quieted. “I can’t move him, yet. Help is coming.”
“Is he hurt?” Her voice was muffled, but her concern was unmistakable.
“I can’t tell.”
She raised her head to look at him. Her hat had come off. Bright auburn curls framed her oval face in stark contrast to her frightening pallor. One cheek was smeared with dirt and scratches. When she met his gaze, her eyes gleamed with anguish and unshed tears.
“Why…isn’t he…getting up?” She moaned, then bit her lip.
“His legs are caught in the jump pillar. Don’t try to move. We’ll get you both free in a minute.”
Brian saw with relief that medical personnel were swarming onto the field. A soldier from her unit dropped to his knees beside her. “Lie still, Lindsey. How badly are you hurt?”
Lindsey dropped her head back onto the turf and sucked in a series of quick breaths. The scent of trampled grass and loamy dirt filled her nostrils. Dakota’s weight was crushing her arm. Trying not to scream, she gritted her teeth and dug her fingers into the thick grass again. Screaming would only frighten the horse and make him struggle.
“I think my arm is broken.”
“We’ll get you free in a minute.”
Please, God, let them hurry.
She felt Shane take her hand and she gripped it tightly. Don’t scream, she thought, be brave. Act like a soldier. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to stay calm. Only it was so hard. It hurt so much.
Through clenched teeth, she managed to say, “We tripped Avery…and Socks. Are they okay?”
Shane said, “Socks is up. Avery looks a little shaken, but I think he’s okay. Hold on, kid.”
“Dakota is all right, isn’t he, Shane?” She panted, trying to block out the merciless agony. “Please, tell me he’s all right.”
“I’ll check him over once we get you free.” She recognized the voice as the grouchy vet who had suggested Dakota wasn’t sound. If only she had heeded him instead of resenting his interference.
Pride goeth before a fall. Dear, Lord, why did I have to find that out the hard way?
She raised her head once more to look at him. “This is my fault. I should have listened to you.”
Two men in EMS uniforms reached her, saving Brian from having to reply. For that, he was thankful. As they attended to Lindsey, soldiers from the unit quickly dismantled the jump and pillar, making room to move the stricken horse. With their help, Brian coaxed Dakota to roll off his side and onto his stomach, but kept the horse from rising. The move freed Lindsey’s arm, but tore a scream from her that ripped into his heart.
While the medics worked on her, she kept asking about her horse. Others offered her reassurances, but Brian remained silent and avoided her pleading eyes. When she was finally placed on a stretcher and taken off the field, he breathed a sigh of relief. She obviously cared a great deal for the animal. The last thing he wanted was to have her see the brave fellow put down.
For the horse was being brave. Brian’s admiration of the bay gelding grew as the big fellow remained still in spite of the activity going on around him. Even though his eyes were wide, with the whites showing all around indicating pain and fear, he didn’t struggle or thrash the way most horses would have.
When the area had been cleared, Brian gave up his position to a color guard member and rose awkwardly to his feet. He leaned heavily on his cane until he was sure he could take a step without falling on his face. He then moved to check out the horse’s leg. There was already serious swelling below the delicate ankle joint. It didn’t look good.
Several of the football officials in black-and-white striped shirts approached the group. One of them asked, “How soon can you get him off the field? We have a game to play.”
“Your game will have to wait.” Brian didn’t bother to hide his ire.
The man Lindsey had called Shane remained crouched beside Dakota, keeping him still with a hand on the horse’s neck. He ignored the officials completely. “Should we let him try to get up?”
Brian shook his head. “Not with the way that leg is swelling. We don’t want him to do more damage. Let me get a splint on it first. My truck is parked outside the gate next to your trailers. It’s white with College of Veterinary Medicine in purple lettering on the side. I’ve got first-aid equipment in there.”
“Private Gillis will get what you need if you’ll give him your keys.”
One of the soldiers stepped forward and held out his hand. After giving him a detailed list of what he wanted and where it was located, Brian waited impatiently for the Private’s return. It seemed to take forever, but in reality only a few minutes had passed when the breathless soldier raced back and handed Brian his kit and the supplies he had requested.
With the help of the other color guard members, Brian soon had the leg encased in a cotton wool wrap. He applied a lightweight but sturdy aluminum splint and secured it with Velcro straps.
“All right, let him try and get up, but if he doesn’t make it on the first attempt, we’ll need to get a lift in here.”
“We’ll get one, but I sure hope we don’t need it. Do you think he has a fracture?”
“I do, but I can’t say for sure until we get him to the clinic and X-ray the leg.”
With a gentle tug on the reins and some quiet words of encouragement, Shane urged Dakota to stand. After a brief hesitation, the horse lurched awkwardly to his feet. The crowd in the stands broke into loud cheering and applause. Brian looked up in surprise. He had forgotten he had several thousand onlookers watching his every move. No doubt some of his students were in attendance. Perhaps he’d present a pop quiz on splint application on Monday to check if they had been paying attention.
“If you can get your trailer in here, I think he can be loaded. The ride to the clinic isn’t far. You’ll need to wedge him in securely. I don’t want him moving around at all.”
“Thanks, Doc. It is doctor, isn’t it? I’m Corporal Shane Ross.” He held out his hand.
Brian took it in a firm grip. “Yes, I’m Dr. Brian Cutter, Professor of Equine Surgery for the College of Veterinary Medicine here at K-State.”
“Then it sounds like Dakota will be in good hands. I sure hope this isn’t a serious injury. The horse belonged to Lindsey’s brother. She’ll never forgive herself if he has to be put down.”
Lindsey endured her examination at the base hospital in stoic silence, answering between clenched lips only the questions posed to her. The pain she could deal with, but the fact that her arm hung useless against her side had her truly frightened. She couldn’t even move her fingers—they had no feeling at all. Thoughts of Danny’s paralysis crowded in her head. She fought down her rising panic as she addressed the physician attending her. “Sir, why can’t I move my hand?”
The gray-haired doctor sat on a stool beside her narrow bed. “Your humerus is fractured, that’s the bone in your upper arm. I’m going to splint it for now and send you to see an orthopedist. This is a nasty break.”
Like she needed anyone to tell her that. “I still don’t understand why I can’t move my fingers.”
“The nerve that controls hand movement runs in a grove along the bone of the upper arm. When a break occurs the nerve is often damaged. You should recover full use of your hand in a few months.”
“Months?” She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.
“You’ll be on restricted duty until then. I’m giving you some pain medication. Take it regularly, don’t try to tough it out. I’ll write some instructions on icing the arm and have the nurse make an appointment with the specialist. Do you have any questions?”
“How soon can I ride?”
“Not for at least eight weeks, maybe longer depending on the nerve damage.”
She turned her face away, not wanting him to see the distress she knew was written there. The Inauguration was only ten weeks away. Did this mean there wouldn’t be a trip to Washington, D.C., for her?
No, she wouldn’t accept that. She wouldn’t let her chance to honor Danny and all he had stood for pass by without a fight. Besides, even if she couldn’t ride, Dakota could make the trip. Danny could still watch him striding down Pennsylvania Avenue. Every recent phone conversation with her sister-in-law had been filled with stories of Danny’s determination to attend the parade in person.
“You won’t be able to drive,” the doctor said gently. “Do you have someone who can get you home?”
She nodded. Captain Watson was waiting for her. Exactly how she was going to get back and forth from her off-base apartment to her duty station until she could drive was a worry she’d put aside until later.
After they applied the splint and sling and gave her some pain medication, she managed to walk out of the room under her own somewhat shaky power. She found Captain Watson perched on the edge of a chair in the waiting area. He looked nervous and ill at ease. Her heart sank.
Bracing herself to hear the worst, she asked, “How’s Dakota?”
Captain Watson sprang to his feet at the sound of her voice. “I haven’t heard. How are you?”
She gave a rueful glance at her big blue sling. “My arm is broken. The doctor said I’ll be on restricted duty for at least eight weeks, but it may be longer than that before I regain the use of my hand.”
“If you’re released, I’ll drive you home.”
“I need to find out how Dakota is.”
“Shane and Lee are with him. As soon as they know something, they’ll call. You are going straight home and that’s an order.”
“With all due respect, sir, I need to be with him. Please?” For a moment, she thought he was going to refuse, then his shoulders slumped in defeat.
“All right. They took him to the veterinary clinic at K-State. I’ll take you, but only because I want to see how he is doing myself.”
“Thanks. I just need to get these prescriptions filled and then I’m ready.”
Half an hour later, they pulled up to the large, white stone buildings on the outskirts of the college campus that comprised the veterinary teaching hospital. Signs at the entrance to the driveway directed them to the Large Animal Clinic at the back of the building. Lindsey’s pain pills were making her woozy, but she tried to hide it. She suspected that the Captain would drive her straight home if she showed any sign of weakness. Inside the building, they found the waiting area. The long, narrow room had panels of fluorescent lights across the ceiling that seemed to glare back painfully into her eyes from the shiny, beige linoleum floor.
The far end of the room was taken up by a wide reception desk where a pretty, young blond woman was talking on the phone. An American flag stood proudly displayed near the front of the desk. Lee and Shane were seated on the one of several mauve utilitarian chairs with bare wooden arms that lined the walls. They both rose and saluted when they caught sight of their captain. They were all still dressed in their exhibition uniforms and they were gathering odd looks from the staff and clients waiting with them.
Captain Watson returned the salute. “Any word yet?”
“No, sir. The doc hasn’t been out to talk to us.”
“That doesn’t sound good.” Lindsey settled gingerly on the couch but still took a quick, indrawn hiss as pain shot through her arm and shoulder. For a second, the room spun wildly and she grabbed hold of Shane’s arm.
“Easy, kid. Are you sure you’re okay?”
“The pain medicine they gave me is making me light-headed, that’s all.”
When the room stopped spinning, she looked up to see the vet from the stadium crossing the room toward them. His thick blond hair was still mussed, but he had traded his sport jacket for a white lab coat.
He stopped in front of the group, but his gaze rested on her. Frowning, he said, “I’m surprised to see you here. How’s your arm?”
The unrelenting, throbbing pain was almost unbearable. “It’s broken,” she snapped. “I want to hear about my horse.”
Shane laid a hand on her good shoulder. “Lindsey, this is Dr. Brian Cutter. He’s been looking after Dakota. Doctor, this is Sergeant Lindsey Mandel. I don’t think you two managed introductions with all that happened earlier.”
Lindsey realized that she must have sounded rude. The fiery agony in her arm wasn’t helping her disposition. She rose to her feet and was pleased when she stayed upright. “I’m sorry, Doctor. I’m just really worried about Dakota. How is he?”
“He has a fracture of the plantar proximal eminences of the second phalanx.”
Lee glanced around the group, then said, “Do you want to try that again in English for those of us who are new to all this horsey stuff?”
Dr. Cutter looked confused by Lee’s statement. “I assumed you are all expert horsemen.”
Captain Watson smiled in amusement. “My soldiers come from the ranks of ordinary units assigned to Fort Riley either as volunteers or as transfers. No previous riding skill is required. The men receive instruction from manuals used by Civil War cavalrymen. Private Gillis has only been with us a few weeks.”
Lee grinned. “I’d never ridden a horse before then, so I still have a lot to learn.”
Dr. Cutter managed a thin smile. “I see. All right, the animal has a fracture in one of the bones in the pastern joint between his ankle and his hoof.”
If Lindsey hadn’t been so upset herself, the look of horror on Lee’s face might have been comical when he said, “They shoot horses for that, don’t they?”
Dr. Cutter frowned sharply. “We are long past the days of shooting horses here. If an animal does have to be euthanized, we use humane methods.”
Lindsey sank onto the chair’s edge before her legs gave out and tried to gather her scattered thoughts. “What can be done for him?”
“You have several options but the best one is surgical arthrodesis. That means we fuse the joint using special pins and a bone graft from his hip. His recovery should take about four months.”
Lindsey bit her lower lip. Dakota wasn’t going to Washington, D.C. It was so unfair. Why had God given her a chance to do something special for her brother only to snatch it away?
Dr. Cutter raked a hand through his hair, giving Lindsey a clue as to why it looked unkempt. “Actually, I am hoping to begin trials of a new procedure using an experimental gene therapy that will speed healing, and this type of fracture is exactly the type I’m looking to study. Unfortunately, I haven’t received grant approval yet.”
The captain asked, “Will Dakota be able to return to duty?”
“A horse can lead a normal life after a fusion. Some horses have even returned to being successful athletes. There are, of course, risks involved, as with any surgery.”
Lindsey studied his face, hoping to see some encouragement, but there wasn’t any. “What are our other options?”
“We can try and cast the injury. You will need to keep him confined to a stall to rest the leg and hope for the best. He’s a calm fellow, so he may do well, but the recovery time will be much longer. The only other choice is to have him put down.”
Captain Watson crossed his arms over his chest. “What will the surgery cost?”
Dr. Cutter’s scowl turned into a look of sorrow. He said gently, “Around fifteen thousand dollars, depending on how well he does. Complications can raise the cost considerably. The clinic typically asks for half of the payment up front.”
“That much?”
“Or more.”
Lindsey’s heart sank at the expression on her captain’s face. She knew even before he spoke what he was going to say.
“I’m afraid the unit doesn’t have a budget to cover a medical bill like that. We are just scraping by as it is.”
“The costs for the cast and follow-up will be much less than the surgery. Is that the treatment you want us to use?”
Quickly, she said, “Couldn’t we at least try to requisition the money?”
“Of course I will, but with the budget cuts we’ve had, I doubt command is going to give up that kind of money for a horse. I’m sorry, Sergeant, I know how much he means to you. Can he be transported back to the base, Doctor?”
“I’ll need to keep him here for several weeks to make sure the cast doesn’t need any adjustments and monitor his condition. After that, I’m sure the base vet can manage his care. We’ll need follow up X-rays to make sure the leg is healing, but those can be done at your stable.”
Captain Watson held out his hand. “Thank you, Dr. Cutter. We’ll leave Dakota here until you think it’s safe to move him.”
Brian shook the offered hand. “Our equine services here at the Veterinarian Medical Teaching Hospital are among the finest in the world.”
It was his standard line when clients were worried about leaving their animals, but this time he was the one who was worried. The young woman was so pale he thought she might pass out at any moment. The horse must mean a great deal to her if she came straight from the hospital in her condition to check on him. Brian knew how much pain a broken bone caused.
She looked up. “Can I see him?”
“I’m not sure. You look like you need to lie down.”
Rising, she faced him with determination blazing in her eyes. “I’m not leaving until I see him.”
He looked to her captain, but all the man did was shrug and try to hold back a grin. Brian could tell he wasn’t going to get any help from that direction. He shoved one hand into his lab coat pocket and nodded toward the door. “All right, but if you pass out, you’ll just lie on the floor. I don’t do humans.”
“What a blessing for us,” she shot back.
He turned away without voicing the comment on the tip of his tongue and led the way to the door beside the reception desk. She was stubborn, irritating and yet pathetic at the same time. So, why did he find her so attractive?
It made no sense. The sooner she saw her horse, the sooner she would leave. Then maybe he could forget those beautiful eyes and the effect they seemed to have on his common sense.
He held open the door, but she stopped so close beside him that he could smell a subtle scent like peaches in her hair. He was tempted to lean closer to make sure. He didn’t, when he realized how unprofessional it would appear.
“What do you think his chances are without surgery?” she asked in a low voice as she stared at him intently.
Such beautiful, sad, green eyes. How could he add to her sorrow? This was the part of his job he dreaded most. He glanced back at the other unit members. They were watching him intently. The words he needed to say stuck in his throat. He sought to give her some hope. “Every patient is different. Only time will tell.”
“If he were your horse, what would you do?”
“If he were my horse and surgery wasn’t an option?”
“Yes.”
“I wouldn’t let him suffer. I’d spend as much time as I needed saying goodbye, then I’d have him put down.”
“No! I couldn’t stand that.” The last bit of color leeched from her face. She turned away, and the sudden movement caused her to lose her balance. His cane clattered to the floor as he caught hold of her.
Chapter Three
“Easy, I’ve got you.” Brian held the slender form of the woman against his chest and struggled to keep upright for both their sakes.
Her hair did smell like peaches. Funny, he hadn’t pictured her as the type of woman to use a scented shampoo. She struck him as a soldier through and through. It was intriguing to know she had a feminine side. He steadied himself by leaning back against the wall.
“I’m fine. It’s just a dizzy spell,” she said quickly.
The tight grip of her hand on his lab coat lapel told him more than words how much distress she was in. If there was one thing he knew well, it was the signs of pain—in animals and in humans.
A second later her fellow soldiers reached them. Shane swept Lindsey up into his arms without a moment’s hesitation and Brian had no choice but to let him. Seeing how easily and gently the man lifted her made Brian acutely aware of his own physical shortcomings. Years ago he had carried Emily just as effortlessly. He thought he had come to terms with his disability a long time ago, but obviously he hadn’t.
His limp was only a small reminder of the tragedy his carelessness had brought about. In one night he had lost both his wife and their unborn child. His mistake had cost him everything he held dear and he had only himself to blame.
Lee quickly retrieved Brian’s cane and handed it to him. Taking the polished wooden staff, Brian nodded his thanks and ignored his feelings of inadequacy. He extended one hand indicating a door a few steps down the hall. “My office has a sofa in it. You can lay her down in there. Do you want me to call nine-one-one?”
“No.” The weak murmur came from Lindsey.
“Are you sure?” Shane asked, looking uncertain.
She nodded as if more words were beyond her.
“This way,” Brian said, and moved to open his door. Inside his office, he swept up a few papers and books from the brown leather sofa to make room for her.
Shane lowered her gingerly, then stood back. None of the men seemed to know what to do next. Brian cleared his throat. “Would you like a drink of water?”
“Yes, please,” she whispered. She still hadn’t opened her eyes.
Brian grabbed a paper cup from the dispenser on the wall and filled it from the bottled container beside it. Moving back to her side, he settled himself on the edge of the couch. He lifted her head and held the cup to her lips. She took a sip then sighed. He lowered her head back to the cushion.
She opened one eye. “I thought you didn’t do humans.”
“I make exceptions for women dressed in Civil War uniforms.”
For an instant a smile tugged at the edge of her lips before she winced in pain again. “How fortunate can a girl get?”
“Are you sure you don’t want me to call nine-one-one?”
“Two rides in an ambulance in one day would be more than my ego can take. I don’t suppose you have some really good pain medicine handy. The pills they gave me at the hospital don’t seem to be doing much.”
“I’ve got a ton of good stuff here.”
She opened both eyes. “Really?”
He nodded. “I’ve got drugs that will knock out a horse.”
“Ha-ha. What does a girl have to do to get some?”
He was pleased to see her smile return, along with a bit more color in her cheeks. “She would need to grow two more legs and a tail.”
“Are you telling me I don’t measure up as one of your patients?”
“I never said anything of the kind. It’s actually nice to be able to ask a patient where it hurts and get an answer.”
“It hurts exactly where my horse landed on me.”
“From my vantage point that looked like almost all of you.”
“You are so right. If you aren’t going to supply me with drugs, can you help me sit up?”
Brian didn’t have a chance to help her. Her comrades were more than happy to oblige. He moved out of their way. When she was sitting upright she waved them aside. “I’m okay now. Don’t hover.”
The men backed up, but they didn’t look ready to leave her to her own devices.
Brian filled the cup again with more water and handed it to her. To his relief, he saw that her color was almost back to normal. “If you won’t go to the hospital, at least go home and lie on your own sofa so I can have mine back.”
Taking the offered drink, she sipped it and nodded. “Once I see Dakota, I’ll do just that.”
All of the men began to protest together, but she ignored their scolding and stood. Cradling her arm, she winced but remained steady on her feet. “Show me the way, Dr. Cutter.”
“He’s down the hall, through the doors at the very end and in the first stall on the left.”
He felt slightly cheated as he watched her fellow unit members guide her out the door, one on each side with her captain close behind. It wasn’t that he wanted her to fall into his arms again. Of course not. He simply wanted to make sure she was all right. But that was what her friends wanted, too, he reminded himself. And they certainly had more of a right to care for her than he did. He was nothing but a stranger.
The thought brought back his frown. He was more than that. He was the man who might have to put her beloved horse to sleep.
Early Monday morning, Lindsey begged a ride to the Large Animal Clinic with Shane. When they arrived, they saw Lee and Avery just going in. It seemed that all of them wanted to check on Dakota before they started their duties for the day.
As she approached Dakota’s stall, Lindsey was surprised to see Captain Watson had arrived before them. He was deep in conversation with Dr. Cutter.
When her captain caught sight of them, he smiled. “I’ve been talking to the doctor and he has a way to do surgery on Dakota at a reduced cost to our unit.”
Lindsey’s heart jumped as happiness surged through her. “How is that possible?”
Dr. Cutter cleared his throat. “Using a new surgical procedure that I’ve developed—I told you about it the other day. Dakota’s break is exactly the sort I’m hoping to trial this repair on.”
“But you said it wasn’t an option.” Shane frowned at the doctor.
“I received notice of my grant acceptance this morning. It is an experimental procedure. If Dakota is entered in the study, it will mean I will have total control of his care. My fees and much of his care will be covered, but that will still leave the bill for his boarding and supplies that the army will have to pay. Unfortunately, the grant isn’t a large one.”
“We can raise the money if we have to,” Captain Watson said.
“Absolutely,” Avery chimed in. “He’s one of our own. We won’t let him down.”
“Of course not,” Lindsey added. She had a little in savings. She would gladly give the money to help pay for Dakota’s care. “When you say experimental, Dr. Cutter, do you mean there is a chance that this won’t help him?”
“There is that chance, but I have every confidence that he will do well. If my procedure works, he could be out of his cast in as little as six weeks.”
Six weeks. That meant Dakota would be able to travel to Washington, D.C., in time for the Inaugural parade. Lindsey’s joy danced like a soap bubble in the wind.
Thank you, God, for giving Dakota into the care of this man.
Captain Watson turned to Brian. “You have my permission to enroll Dakota in your study.”
“Excellent. There are some forms you’ll need to sign. If you’ll follow me to my office, we can take care of that now.”
When the two men walked away, Lindsey opened the gate and stepped into the stall where Dakota stood quietly. He rested with his head lowered and his eyes half-closed. His dazed look worried her until she realized that they would be giving him pain medication and sedation to keep him quiet.
“Hey, Dakota. How’s it going, fella?”
His head came up at the sound of her voice and he whinnied softly. Delighted at his responsiveness, she stepped closer and began to rub the side of his face. “Don’t worry about a thing. Dr. Cutter is going to fix you up in no time.”
Behind her, Avery said, “Do you think an experimental surgery using gene therapy is the best way to go?”
Shane moved up to stand beside Lindsey. Reaching out, he patted Dakota’s neck. “It sounds a bit like science fiction to me.”
“I have faith that it will work. I think the Lord brought us here at exactly the right time for Dakota to get this care.”
Lee shoved his hands into his front pockets. “It would have been better if He had kept Dakota from breaking a leg in the first place.”
Lindsey didn’t answer. This, too, had to be part of God’s plan, but like Danny’s injury, it was a bitter pill to swallow.
She ran her hand over Dakota’s soft nose. Her faith was being tested. The words of Psalm 9:9 echoed in her mind.
The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.
In her time of trouble, had she turned to the Lord as she should have? Perhaps that was what she was being shown. Little by little, she let go of the anger she had been holding on to.
I will try to listen with my heart for Your wisdom, Lord. Show me the path and I will do my best to travel it.
Three days later, Lindsey was struggling to use the can opener with her left hand when the doorbell rang. She stared at the container of corn that refused to fit in the opener. “We’re not done. I won’t be defeated by an inanimate object.”
She noticed the faint smell of burning mozzarella, but the oven timer said her frozen pizza still had five minutes to go. The doorbell chimed again. Leaving the tiny kitchenette of her apartment, she crossed the living room to the front door. She opened it and stared in stunned silence.
“Surprise!” Her sister stood on the stoop with a suitcase resting beside her. Speechless, Lindsey could only stare.
Looking uncertain, Karen said, “Say something.”
Shaking herself out of her stupor, Lindsey enfolded Karen in a one-armed hug. “Hello. This certainly is a surprise. What are you doing here?”
Karen returned the embrace. “I’m just visiting.”
Taking a step back, Lindsey studied Karen’s face. Her sister had always been the rebel in the family. Her shaggy, cropped blond hair haloed a heart-shaped face. Danny often said Karen’s big brown eyes and ready smile could make men weak in the knees, but her quirky wit was her greatest gift. Karen had a smile on her face now, but it didn’t erase the sadness that lurked in the depths of her gaze.
“From the look on your face I’d say this is more than just visiting. What brings you all the way from Washington, D.C. to Kansas?”
“Invite me in and I’ll tell you about it. Oh, you poor woman, look at you. You’re covered in bruises.”
“Having a horse roll over you will do that. Honestly, Karen, why are you here? Did Dad send you to take care of me?”
“No, although I’m sure he would have thought of it in a day or two,” Karen added quickly.
“You should be helping Abigail and Danny. I can take care of myself.”
Karen cleared her throat. “I just needed to get away for a while. I’m sorry I didn’t call. Showing up and surprising you seemed like a good idea at the time, but it wasn’t, was it?”
Lindsey reached out and took her hand. “It’s a wonderful idea. You know I’m always happy to see you. Come in and tell me why you’re here.”
Karen’s face brightened. “Later. You don’t happen to have some tea, do you?”
“I’ll tell you what. If you can wrestle open a can of corn for me, I’ll make you a whole pot.”
Inside the apartment, Karen followed Lindsey into the kitchen. At the entrance to the small room decorated with rooster wallpaper and rooster border above the few white cabinets, Karen paused and stared up at the large rooster-shaped clock on the wall. The avocado-green refrigerator began its noisy rumbling and Lindsey gave it a sharp shove to silence the sound. After a moment, Karen said in a tentative murmur, “You have a…nice place.”
“Don’t even try to be kind. It’s a rental and it’s cheap. I don’t care what the wallpaper looks like as long as the roosters don’t crow.”
“What a marvelous attitude.”
“I’m easy, what can I say?”
Karen wrinkled her nose. “I think something’s burning.”
“Oh, that’s just my lunch. Can you help me with this? I damaged a nerve when I broke my arm and my hand is completely useless. I can’t feel a thing.” Handing her sister the offending can, Lindsey indicated the opener with a tilt of her head.
Karen’s eyes widened in alarm. “Dad never mentioned that you had no feeling in your arm. Is it permanent?”
Lindsey rushed to reassure her, knowing she was thinking about Danny’s condition. “No, the specialist said in two or three months I’ll be as good as new. Dad didn’t say anything because I haven’t told him.”
“Does this mean you won’t be riding in the Inaugural parade?”
“I haven’t given up hope. I’ve got two months and then some to recover.”
“Lindsey, you should let the family know you might not be there. Everyone is making plans to attend.”
“By everyone, I assume you mean Danny, too?”
“It’s all he talks about to the nurses and therapists who come to the house. He is so proud of you. He insists he’ll be there to watch you and Dakota in person.”
“Now you know why I don’t have the heart to say anything yet.”
“Yes, I guess I do,” Karen said softly.
Lindsey hesitated. “There’s more.”
“What?”
“Dakota broke a bone in his front leg when we fell.”
“Oh, no!”
“He’s had surgery and we think he is going to be fine.”
Karen pressed a hand to her forehead. “No wonder Abigail thought there was something you weren’t telling us the last time you called.”
“I didn’t want to keep secrets, but I wanted to be sure of things one way or the other before I gave Danny that news.”
“Are you sure of things now?”
“Not really.”
“Lindsey, you have to tell him. Danny is stronger than you think. If you could only see the way he tackles his therapy sessions. He’s able to raise his right shoulder now and he’s up to almost two hours off his ventilator each day.”
“He’s working hard because he has a goal to reach. That is exactly why I’m not going to tell him yet. I can’t risk taking away his motivation. I have faith that Dakota and I will both be in Washington, D.C., and Danny will be strong enough to be there to see it.”
“I don’t agree with you, but I won’t say anything for now.”
“That’s all I’m asking. Thank you. So, are you going to open that can for me or not?”
Smiling, her sister tossed the can in the air and caught it again. “I’ll give it my best shot.”
Karen successfully extracted the yellow kernels from their stubborn metal prison while Lindsey put the kettle on to boil. A minute later the oven timer rang. Karen snatched up the pot holder before Lindsey could reach it and opened the oven. She pulled out a cookie sheet with a small pizza on it.
“This is your lunch?”
“That and the corn.”
“Pizza and corn?”
“It’s not as weird as it sounds.”
“Yes, it is. You need something healthy.” Karen set the cookie sheet on top of the stove.
“This is healthy.”
“At least drink some milk with it.” Karen pulled open the refrigerator door.
Lindsey winced. She knew there wasn’t any milk. In fact, there wasn’t much of anything in her fridge except a half-empty bottle of ketchup and one lonely dill pickle in a jar. “I haven’t had a chance to get to the commissary.”
Karen shut the door and frowned at Lindsey. “Since when?”
“Since before the accident.”
“Obviously, it’s a good thing I stopped by. Eat while I have a cup of tea and then I’ll drive you to wherever you need to go.”
Lindsey used a spatula to transfer her overly crisp pizza to a plate and then set the plate on the table. “You don’t have to run errands for me.”
“I can see that no one else is. Where are the tea bags?”
The kettle began to whistle. After finding a cup and filling it with hot water, Karen joined Lindsey at the table. Waiting until after her sister had fixed the tea, Lindsey asked, “Are you going to tell me why you’re here?”
Karen raised her cup to her lips and blew on the steaming brew. She took a sip and set the cup down. “This is very good tea. What kind did you say it was?”
“Earl Grey, and don’t change the subject.”
Taking a deep breath, Karen closed her eyes and said, “It’s Dad.”
“I don’t understand.”
Karen leaned her elbows on the table. “He won’t stop fixing me up. I’m only twenty-one but all of the sudden he acts like I’m the only chance he’ll ever have for grandchildren. There has been a steady parade of guys who just happen to stop by our apartment. He’s driving me crazy.”
“I’m sure Dad—like the rest of us—is having a hard time adjusting to Danny’s condition. Do you want me to talk to him?” Lindsey took one bite of her pizza, then pushed the unappetizing concoction to the side.
“Thanks for the offer,” Karen said gently. “But I’m hoping a little separation will be good for both of us. That’s why I’m at your door begging to stay and nurse you through this injury. And before you say no, I did discuss this with Abigail. She can do without me for a few weeks. Please, can I stay?”
Lindsey patted the orthopedic brace and sling the specialist had fitted her with. “I don’t need a nurse, but a roommate who can grocery shop and run the can opener will be a welcome addition until I’m out of this contraption.”
“Honey, that sounds great.” Karen’s relief was evident.
“Don’t be too sure. This is a one-bedroom apartment and that means you get the sofa.”
Karen’s tinkling laughter was music to Lindsey’s ears. During their frequent and lengthy phone conversations, the sound of happiness had been sadly lacking in her sister’s voice. Danny’s injury had affected everyone. They were all trying to find a new “normal” for the family.
Picking up her teacup, Karen said, “Roommates pay rent. What’s space on a lumpy couch going to cost me?”
“The use of two good arms and your skill as a chauffeur. If you really don’t mind driving me, I’m dying to get over to the university to see how Dakota is doing. But what about school? Can you afford to take the time off?”
Setting the white cup down, Karen picked up her spoon and began to stir. “I had already decided to take a semester off. I couldn’t concentrate in class. There was no use flunking out on top of everything else.”
Seeing Karen’s grief made Lindsey acutely aware that her baby sister was dealing with a lot more than their father’s matchmaking. “I wish I was closer so that I could help, too.”
Rising, she carried her plate to the counter. After dumping the remains of her uneaten lunch in the trash, she laid the dish in the sink and turned on the water. It was then that she felt Karen’s hands on her shoulders turning her around.
Tears blurred Lindsey’s vision and she loathed the fact. She had tried so hard not to cry. “I hate that this has happened to him.”
“I know.” Karen’s voice was low and brimming with emotion. “But Danny believed that protecting his country was more than a job. It was something that he knew in his heart he had to do.”
Lindsey squeezed her eyes shut against the pain that swallowed her heart and made it hard to breathe. “But the price…was too high. He is the best…and the brightest…and this seems so cruel.” The words, when she finally managed them, were ragged and broken between her sobs.
“I know you love him. He knows it, too.”
“I haven’t told him that often enough.”
“You don’t have to. He sees it. I wish I could hug you, but I’m afraid I’ll hurt you.”
“My left side is fine,” she hiccupped. To prove it, she embraced Karen with one arm and the two of them clung together as they wept.
From the corner of his eye, Brian caught the fugitive movement. Without looking up from the grant application on his desk, he said, “Isabella, don’t chew on that pencil.”
The culprit ignored him.
He tried injecting more menace into his tone. “Isabella, I said, no!”
The oversize brown lop-eared rabbit perched on the corner of his large desk chose to disregard his warning. She pulled her prize from the purple Wildcat mug he used to hold his writing utensils. Settling the yellow number two under one paw, she began to nibble it to bits.
“You little minx.” He rose from his chair and scooped her up, tucking her firmly under one arm. He stuck the pencil back in the mug with numerous other scarred victims.
He drew a hand down her soft, furry body, then scratched her favorite spot behind her left ear. “Why do you always zero in on the new ones?”
Lifting his cane from the back of his chair, he crossed the office and pulled open the door. Seated at the reception desk was one of the young students who doubled as a part-time secretary for him.
“Jennifer, will you put Isabella in her outside cage, please?”
“Of course. What did you do to get banished from Dr. Cutter’s desk this time?” she asked the rabbit as she took her from Brian.
“The usual,” he answered.
“Ah, pencil nibbling, were we?” She, too, scratched the bunny behind the ears.
“I can’t break her of the habit.”
“You could try switching to pens.”
“I like pencils. They let me change my mind as often as I need to.”
“So does the delete key on your computer.”
“It isn’t the same.”
Rolling her eyes, Jennifer headed for the outside door and said, “Therein lies your problem, Doctor. You have to learn to say what you mean the first time.”
Brian turned back to his office. He knew how to say what he meant, but he was often accused of being too gruff. Whenever he needed to draft a letter or a grant application, he worked and reworked the words until they seemed soft and polite enough. Pencils worked best for the task. After he had the tone he wanted, he typed his work into his computer. Some might say he was making twice the work for himself, but he still preferred his tried-and-true method.
Certainly, his upcoming lecture on pastern arthrodesis for the Equine Surgical Conference in January was no exception. It was an honor to be asked to speak and he wanted his address to be perfect. He intended to rework it until he was completely satisfied. Fortunately, the college bookstore had an excellent supply of the large yellow legal pads he liked best.
Back at his desk, he put aside his work on his presentation for the moment and opened the file on Dakota. The gelding wasn’t doing as well as he had hoped. The surgery itself had gone well, but the big horse seemed to be having more pain instead of less. That wasn’t encouraging. A knock at his door caused him to look up. Jennifer stood in the doorway minus the rabbit.
She motioned toward the folder he held. “Is that the file on the army horse? I was wondering how he was getting along.”
“I’m not happy with his progress. Even with the medication he’s getting, his respiratory rate and pulse rate are higher than they should be. The staff has been reporting that he’s restless and he isn’t eating well.”
“None of those are good signs.”
A smile twitched at the corners of his mouth, but he held it back. “So you have been paying attention in class. Will wonders never cease?”
She blushed and looked chagrined. “Is there anything else you need, Doctor? If not, I’m going to take off.”
He hadn’t meant to offend her, but before he could form the right words to apologize, she was out the door.
Of all the females he had known in his life, only Isabella never seemed to care what tone he chose or how gruff his words sounded. If only more women had her tolerance, his life would be a lot easier.
Before he had a chance to dwell on the current poor state of his interpersonal skills, Jennifer opened the door again. “Doctor, Sergeant Mandel is here to see you.”
The sudden rush of pleasure he felt at hearing her name unnerved him. He tried unsuccessfully to stifle his excitement.
“Show her in.”
“Yes, Doctor.”
She nodded but before she could close the door, he said, “Jennifer, I was teasing earlier when I made that remark about you paying attention in class.”
“You were?”
“Of course. I think you have an excellent future in the surgical field.”
She looked doubtful. “You do?”
“I do.”
She flipped her long blond hair back over one shoulder. “Wow! Okay, but next time you’re kidding someone, Doc, you should smile.”
“I’ll certainly try to do so.”
Chapter Four
Jennifer held open the door so that Lindsey and another young woman could enter Brian’s office. Lindsey appeared much more rested today, he noticed when she walked in. To his surprise, she looked even prettier than he remembered. She radiated an energy that seemed to warm a place inside him that he had almost forgotten existed. Like the dancing flames of a campfire on a cold night in the mountains, she left him longing to draw closer to the warmth.
Wearing a camouflage shirt and matching pants with black boots, she looked every inch the soldier— except for the blue sling on her arm. She certainly wasn’t the type of woman that normally would have interested him. Since his wife’s death he couldn’t think of a single woman he had been this attracted to, but there was something about this woman that intrigued him. He didn’t care for the sensation. When he realized he was staring, he shook off the fanciful notion and rose to his feet. “Please come in, Sergeant Mandel. Have a seat.”
Her smile flashed briefly and was gone. She appeared hesitant as she sat on the sofa. “Thank you for seeing us. This is my sister, Karen Mandel.”
He nodded to the woman dressed in jeans and a tailored navy shirt. “I’m pleased to meet you.”
Addressing the two of them, he said, “As you may know, Dakota’s surgery went very well. He’s tolerating his cast, which is always a good thing. In two to three weeks he’ll go back to surgery to have the pins removed and a new cast applied.”
“Yes, Captain Watson has been keeping us informed,” Karen said softly.
“Captain Watson is the reason we’re here,” Lindsey began. “Because of this arm, I’ve been reassigned to light duty. My orders are to oversee Dakota’s care.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I’ll be doing what I can to help here. Karen has asked to be involved, as well, and Captain Watson has agreed. Providing we’re not in the way, of course.”
“Are you sure you’re fit to work?”
“I can do whatever is needed, within reason.”
“Working around sick and injured horses can be dangerous.”
She leaned toward him, her smile changing from hesitant to forced. “I know that, Doctor.”
Of course she did. She was the one with the broken arm. Retreating into his most professional demeanor, he said tersely, “That is something you can’t forget when you are here. Given your injury, I’m not sure what you will be able to do.”
Her smile disappeared. Did he only imagine the room grew a few degrees cooler?
“I’ve been taking care of the unit’s animals for over a year, Doctor. All sixteen horses plus the two mules. I’m sure I can manage to be of some help to you and your staff, even if all I do is muck out the stall. I know how to follow orders.”
He sat back in his chair, registering her annoyed tone. She was upset, but he didn’t know why. “Very well. I’ll let the staff know that you’ll be…assisting here until the horse is fit to return to the army’s stables.”
“Thank you,” she snapped back.
“May I see Dakota now?” Karen asked, glancing between Lindsey and himself with an odd gleam in her eyes.
“Certainly. He is through the double doors at the end of the hallway. His stall is the first one on the left down the first aisle. I need to speak with my secretary and then I’ll join you at his stall in case you have any questions.”
Brian tucked the file under his arm and escaped from his office. Fortunately, Jennifer had already left for the evening. He laid the file down and raked his fingers through his hair as he tried to gather his scattered thoughts.
The idea of having Lindsey in the clinic every day was a disturbing one. Without understanding exactly why, he knew she would interfere with his work. She would be a distraction he didn’t need, but he couldn’t see how to prevent her from coming.
Her request wasn’t all that unusual. Animal owners occasionally spent long hours with their pets and he’d rarely had to forbid access. Besides, she had her orders. There wasn’t much he could do about it except try to avoid her.
Even as the thought occurred to him, he knew that avoiding Lindsey wasn’t what he really wanted.
“Take a deep breath, Lindsey,” Karen said after Dr. Cutter had left the room.
Lindsey tried to swallow her irritation with the man. “I’m a soldier in the United States Army. I’ve been trained to do my duty no matter what the circumstances. A broken arm is no treat, but I’ve been assigned to Dakota’s care and I’ll follow my orders. It doesn’t matter if he thinks I can or not.”
“He’s only trying to be kind.”
“I didn’t hear a lick of kindness in his tone.”
“Maybe not in his tone, but I certainly saw it in the way he was looking at you.”
Lindsey turned to Karen in stunned surprise. “You’ve got to be kidding.”
“I don’t blame you for being interested in him. He’s attractive and he loves animals—what’s not to like?”
“I certainly don’t see the same thing you do. Come on, I’ll show you where they’re keeping Dakota.”
Leaving his office, Lindsey glanced toward the reception area. Dr. Cutter was standing at the desk, but his cute young secretary was nowhere to be seen. Not that it mattered what his hired help looked like. It certainly didn’t matter. Not to her, Lindsey decided.
Leading Karen toward the recovery stalls, Lindsey waited until they were through the door before she spoke her mind.
“The man is rude and he’s arrogant and I am certainly not interested in him.”
“I’ll admit he needs a little fine-tuning, but he has potential.”
“Potential for what? No, don’t tell me or you’ll sound like Danny. He never lets up with the ‘When are you going to settle down?’ speech. Once he got married, all he could think about was how I needed to find someone, too.”
Being in love had made him forget the painful scenes from their childhood, but Lindsey never forgot them. She knew better than to believe she could make an army career and a marriage work. Her own parents had been perfect examples of how wrong it could get. The endless fights, the recriminations, the tears and the broken promises she had witnessed as a child were things she couldn’t forget. As far as she was concerned, it was better not to have children than to subject them to the kind of childhood she’d had.
Marriage was hard enough without adding frequent reassignment, long separations and dangerous duty to the mix. Danny had been willing to take the chance that he could make it work with Abigail, and maybe they would be one of the blessed ones, but Lindsey wasn’t willing to open her heart up to that kind of pain.
At Dakota’s stall, Karen leaned through the rails and ran a hand down the big bay’s nose. “Whatever made you think I was talking about settling down?” she quipped. The sly smile she cast Lindsey over her shoulder made Lindsey want to shake her.
Leaning on the gate beside her sister, Lindsey decided to set her straight. “For your information, I have no intention of starting a relationship. The army is my life. I love moving to new posts, seeing new places, meeting new people.”
“Why? I hated it as a kid.”
“I guess the good Lord gave me the wanderlust gene. Our father had it and the next generation of Mandels will probably have it, too.”
“Except that there won’t be a next generation of Mandels.” Karen’s soft words brought the extent of their loss into sharp focus.
Lindsey slipped her good arm over Karen’s shoulders. “I’m sorry. That was a thoughtless comment on my part. We can pray that Danny and Abigail may still be blessed with a child.”
“I guess we can’t spend our lives trying not to say or do something that will remind us of Danny’s condition. I think it has been hardest on Dad. He really wanted to see the traditions of the family carried on.”
“I know. That’s my duty now. I’m going to carry on and serve with distinction.”
“Why? Hasn’t our family given this country enough?”
“You don’t mean that.”
“I’ve often wondered if you aren’t trying to live the life you think Dad wanted without finding out what kind of life you wanted for yourself.”
“This is the life I want,” Lindsey insisted.
Karen sighed in defeat. “As long as that’s true then I’m going to be happy for you, but you don’t have to do it alone. Sharing life’s burdens is part of the reason God made it so that two could become one.”
Reaching out, Lindsey tweaked her sister’s nose. “When did you get so wise?”
“I think it was in Philosophy 101 my freshman year.”
Lindsey smiled at her joke. The door to the hallway opened and Brian walked over to join them. “Do you have any questions, ladies?”
Lindsey turned to study Dakota. The cast extended from above his knee to below his hoof. It was wrapped in bright blue cloth.
“As you can see,” Brian began, “he is wearing special shoes on his other feet to accommodate the height of the cast and keep him standing level.”
“Why is that important?” Karen stepped over to make room for Brian to stand between herself and Lindsey.
“It will help prevent undue stress on his other legs. Horses carry most of their weight on their front legs. Unlike dogs or cats, they can’t stand three legged for long. We want him standing evenly, but not moving around much.”
“I expected to see him hanging from a sling.”
“We do use slings if we have to, but usually that is for bone breaks in the upper legs.”
Lindsey drew her hand down Dakota’s neck. “He doesn’t look as if he feels well. Is he in pain?”
Brian flipped through the chart that was wired to the front of the stall. “I’ve ordered pain medication. He’s been receiving regular doses. His X-rays show the pins are in excellent position. He should recover full use of the leg.”
Lindsey finally voiced the question she had been afraid to ask until now. “Do you believe Dakota could be healed enough to walk three miles with a rider by late January?”
“It might be possible, but I can’t give you a guarantee.”
“He has to be fit by then. If it’s possible, then that’s good enough for me. If you do your best for him, prayer will take us the rest of the way.”
“I’m sorry, but why does he have to be fit by late January?”
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