Mistress To Her Husband
Mistress To Her Husband
PENNY JORDAN
Penny Jordan needs no introduction as arguably the most recognisable name writing for Mills & Boon. We have celebrated her wonderful writing with a special collection, many of which for the first time in eBook format and all available right now.Kate arrives for a regular day at the office to be greeted by the new managing directornone other than her ex-husband!Billionaire businessman Sean Howard had been devastated when his marriage to Kate ended. Seeing her again he realises the physical attraction is still there, and with just one touch it can be re-ignited.Soon Kates not just sleeping with the bossshes become mistress to her husband!
Celebrate the legend that is bestselling author
PENNY JORDAN
Phenomenally successful author of more than two hundred books with sales of over a hundred million copies!
Penny Jordan's novels are loved by millions of readers all around the word in many different languages. Mills & Boon are proud to have published one hundred and eighty-seven novels and novellas written by Penny Jordan, who was a reader favourite right from her very first novel through to her last.
This beautiful digital collection offers a chance to recapture the pleasure of all of Penny Jordan's fabulous, glamorous and romantic novels for Mills & Boon.
Penny Jordan is one of Mills & Boon's most popular authors. Sadly, Penny died from cancer on 31st December 2011, aged sixty-five. She leaves an outstanding legacy, having sold over a hundred million books around the world. She wrote a total of one hundred and eighty-seven novels for Mills & Boon, including the phenomenally successful A Perfect Family, To Love, Honour & Betray, The Perfect Sinner and Power Play, which hit the Sunday Times and New York Times bestseller lists. Loved for her distinctive voice, her success was in part because she continually broke boundaries and evolved her writing to keep up with readers changing tastes. Publishers Weekly said about Jordan Women everywhere will find pieces of themselves in Jordan's characters and this perhaps explains her enduring appeal.
Although Penny was born in Preston, Lancashire and spent her childhood there, she moved to Cheshire as a teenager and continued to live there for the rest of her life. Following the death of her husband, she moved to the small traditional Cheshire market town on which she based her much-loved Crighton books.
Penny was a member and supporter of the Romantic Novelists Association and the Romance Writers of Americatwo organisations dedicated to providing support for both published and yet-to-be-published authors. Her significant contribution to women's fiction was recognised in 2011, when the Romantic Novelists Association presented Penny with a Lifetime Achievement Award.
Mistress to Her Husband
Penny Jordan
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
CHAPTER ONE
KATE youll never guess what! John told us this morning, whilst you were at the dentist. The business has been taken over. And the new boss is coming in tomorrow to interview everyone!
Kate Vincent digested her co-workers excited comments in silence. Dropping enviably thick, dark lashes reflectively over topaz eyes, she considered what she had been told. She had only been with the company for six months, as before that shed only been able to manage a part-time job whilst she was completing her Masters. With the qualification nicely enhancing her CV she had felt confident enough to apply for this post, which previously she would have considered out of her range.
So whos taking us over? Kate questioned Laura, absently flipping the smooth length of her chestnut-brown hair over her shoulder as she did so. It had been hot outside in the street, and the coolness of the offices air-conditioning was very welcome.
Well, John wouldnt say, Laura responded, suppressing a small envious sigh as she studied Kates elegantly slender body, clad in a neat white T-shirt teamed with a chocolate-brown linen skirt.
Laura had been with her when Kate had bought the skirt, an end-of-line sale buy which she herself would have deemed dull. But on Kate it looked not just good, but also somehow discreetly expensive.
Apparently everything has to be kept hush-hush until tomorrow. She gave Kate a rueful look.
I suppose we should have seen it coming. After all, John has been hinting for ages that hed like to take early retirementbut I never thought he was contemplating selling out. Mind you, he and Sheila dont have any children, do they? So I dont suppose theres much point in hanging on when they could be spending their time in that condo of theirs in Miami.
Kate listened intently to Laura as she booted up her computer. The business John Loames had set up to supply specialist facilities and equipment to the building trade had been very successful, but Kate had seen for herself since she had started to work for the small private company as its accounts executive that John was growing less and less inclined to seek out new contracts. Which was a pity, because she knew that the business had a great deal of potential, and she was not entirely surprised that someone had bought John out.
Everyones worried about what might happen, Laura confided to her. None of us want to lose our jobs.
Someone new taking over might not necessarily be a bad thing, Kate pointed out to her calmly. Theres ample room for the business to be expanded, and then there would be more than enough work for all of usprovided, of course, the new owner doesnt already own a similar business and just wants to amalgamate Johns with his own.
Oh, dont say that! Laura begged worriedly, giving a small shudder. Roy and I have only just increased our mortgage so that we can extend the house. Her face became slightly pink. Were trying for a family, and a baby will mean that we definitely need extra space. The last thing I need right now is to lose my job! Which reminds meJohn told us that he wants us all here especially early tomorrow. Apparently the new owner has said specifically that he will be here at eight.
Eight? Kate switched her attention from her e-mails to Laura, her forehead crinkling in a worried frown. Are you telling me John wants us here at eight?
Yes.
Kates porcelain-clear skin paled slightly. It was impossible for her to make it to the office for eight oclock in the morning. Pre-school didnt start until eight, and she would have to leave Ollie at seven-thirty at the very latest if she was to make it here for eight. She could feel the tension cramping her stomach.
It was hard enough for any mother to work full timea constant finely-judged balancing actbut when one added into that delicate balance the fact that the mother in question was a single parent, fighting desperately hard to give as much emotional security as two loving parents would, plus the fact that she had not told her employers that she had child, then that balancing act became dangerously unstable.
Just thinking about Ollie was enough to have her stomach twisting in knots of maternal protective anxiety.
Whats wrong? Laura asked curiously, sensing her tension.
Ernothing.
Kate hadnt told anyone at work about Ollie. All too sensitive to the attitude of colleagues and employers to the difficulties that came hand in hand with a worker who was a motherespecially a single motherKate had made no mention of her son during her interview with John. It had only been after she had started to work for the company that she had learned that John had a somewhat old-fashioned attitude about employing women with very young children. By then she had realised how well suited she was to her job, and it to her, and although it had caused her some sleepless nights and many qualms, she had decided to keep Ollies existence a secret. Since she was fiercely honest by nature, this decision had pricked her conscience on more than one occasion, but she had told herself that it was a necessary omission if she was to succeed with her career plans.
She was well qualified now, and she was determined to provide her son with at least some of the material benefits he would have enjoyed had his father not abandoned her.
His father! Kate could feel the cold sickness and despair laced with anger spewing up inside herit was a mixture as dangerous and toxic as arsenic, but she was the one it threatened to poison and destroy, not the man who had broken her heart and deserted her.
Now she considered that she and Oliver were better off without himeven though what she was earning only just covered the mortgage she was paying on the tiny cottage she had bought in a pretty village several miles away from the town and Olivers out-of-school childcare, leaving just enough for food and other essentials.
Childcare! Her lips, normally soft and sweetly curved, hardened and thinned. She was the best person to be providing her son with childcare, but she was not in a financial position to be able to do so.
Her current job was the first rung on the career ladder she was going to have to climb in order to support them both properly. The head of her department was due to retire in two years time, and Kate had secretly been hoping that if she did her job well enough John might promote her into the vacancy.
Her twenty-fifth birthday wasnt that far away, and neither was Ollies fifth. His fifth birthday and her fifth year of being alone, of being withoutSwiftly Kate buried the potentially damaging thoughts. She didnt need them, she didnt want them, and she damn well wasnt going to let them disturb her hard-won peace of mind.
It was her future she needed to focus on, and not her past! This takeover could destroy any chance she might have had of such a promotion, but it might also give her increased opportunities, she reflected, as she studied some comparison charts she had set up on her own initiative, to see which customers could be approached to increase their orders.
As she stood in the open doorway of the small village nursery and watched her son run towards her, his face lighting up as he saw her, Kate felt her heart contract with love. When she bent to scoop him up into her arms, and buried her face into the warm flesh of his neck to breathe in his delicious little-boy smell, she knew that no matter what sacrifices she had to make, or how hard she had to work, she would do it for Ollies sake.
A small frown pleated her forehead as she looked round the classroom, empty now of the other children. She had chosen to live in the village because she had wanted to provide Ollie with a sense of belonging and community, to provide him with the kind of childhood she herself had been denied. But living here meant she had to travel to the city to work, which in turn meant that Ollie had to wait for her long after the others had been collected.
She had never intended that her child should grow up like thisan only child with no family other than her. She had wanted things to be so different for her child, her children, than they had been for her.
Two loving parents, siblings, the sure knowledge of being loved and wanted. The sure knowledge of being loved and wanted!
Pain gripped her. It had been five yearssurely only a woman with no sense of self-worth or self-respect would allow herself to think about a man who had betrayed her love and rejected her? A man who had sworn love for ever, who had sworn that he shared her dreams and goals, who had taught her to trust and love him, and who had whispered against her lips as he took her virginal body that he wanted to give her his child, that he wanted to surround that child with love and security.
A man who had lied to her and left her brokenhearted, disillusioned, and completely alone.
To be with him she had gone against the wishes of the aunt and uncle who had brought her up, and because of that they had disowned her.
Not that Kate would have wanted her aunt and uncle involved in the life of her precious son. They might have given her a home when she had been orphaned, but they had done so out of duty and not love. And she had craved love so badly, so very badly.
Ollie was beginning to worry.
The faint hint of reproach in the nursery teachers voice made Kate wince inwardly.
I know Im a bit late, she apologised. There was an accident on the bypass.
The nursery teacher was comfortably round and in late middle age. She had grandchildren herself, and her small charges loved and respected her. Kate had lost count of the number of time she had heard Ollie insisting, But Mary says
Ten minutes later Kate was unlocking the door to their small cottage. It was right in the centre of the village, its front windows overlooking the green, with its duck pond, and at the back of the house a long narrow garden.
Ollie was a sturdily built child, with firm solid muscles and a head of thick black curls. An inheritance from his father, although Ollie himself did not know it.
So far as Kate was concerned the man who had fathered her son no longer existed, and she refused to allow him any place in their lives. Ollies placid nature meant that until recently he had accepted that he did not have a father, without asking Kate very many questions about him. However, the fact that his new best friend did have a father had led to Ollie starting to want to know more.
Kate frowned. So far Ollie had been content with her responses, but it made her heart ache to see the way he watched longingly whilst Tom Lawson played with his son.
Sean unfurled his long body from the seat of his Mercedes and stood still whilst he looked at the building in front of him.
His handmade Savile Row suit sat elegantly on his lean-limbed body, the jacket subtly masking the powerful breadth of his shoulders and the muscles he had built up in the years when he had earned his living hiring himself out to whichever builder would take him on.
His sweat had gone into the making of more than one motorway, as well as several housing estates, but even in those days as an ill-educated teenager he had promised himself that one day things would be different, that one day he would be the man giving the orders and not taking them.
As a young child hed literally had to fight for his food until, aged five, hed been abandoned by his hippie mother and been taken into care. In his twenties he had spent his days building extensions, and anything else he would get paid for, and his nights studying for a Business Studies degree. He had celebrated his thirty-first birthday by selling the building company he had built up from nothing for twenty million. Had he wanted to do so, he could have retired. But that was not his way. He had seen the potential of companies such as Johns and had seized the opportunities with both hands. He was now thirty-five.
He had big expansion plans for the business he had just acquired, but for his plans to succeed he needed the right kind of workforce. A dedicated, energetic, enthusiastic and ambitious workforce. This morning he was going to meet his new employees, and he was going to assess them in the same way he had assessed those who had worked for him when he had first set up in businessby meeting them face to face. Thenand only thenwould he read their personnel files.
He was an arrestingly good-looking man, but the early-morning sunlight picked out the harsh lines that slashed from his nose to his mouth and revealed a man of gritty determination who rarely smiled. He wore his obvious sexuality with open cynicism, and it glittered in the dense Celtic blue of his eyes now, as a young woman stopped walking to give him an appreciative and appraising look.
In the years since he had made his millions he had been pursued by some extraordinarily beautiful women, but Sean knew that they would have turned away in disgust and contempt from the young man he had once been.
Somethingpart bitterness and part paintook the warmth from his gaze and dulled its blueness.
He had come a long way from what he had once been. A long wayand yet still not far enough?
Locking his car, he started to stride towards the building.
Kate could feel perspiration beginning to dew her forehead as she willed the traffic lights to change. Her stomach was so tight with nervous anxiety that it hurt.
She had swallowed her normal pride last night and asked Carol, Ollies best friends mother, if she could leave Ollie with her at seven-thirty for her to take him on to school with her son George. The pain in her stomach intensified. She hated treating her precious son as though he was aa bundle of washing!
Why on earth had the new owner insisted on them arriving so early? Was he just unthinking, or uncaring? Whichever it was, it did not bode well for her future with the company, she decided fretfully.
As she reached the traffic lights she saw the broken-down car which had been the cause of the delay. It was already ten past eight, and it would take her at least another ten minutes to get to work.
Half past eight! Kate gritted her teeth as she hurried into the building. She was already walking fast, and she broke into an anxious run as she covered the last few yards. But the hope she had had that she might be able to slide discreetly into Johns office whilst the meeting was still in progress was destroyed as the door opened and her colleagues came out into the corridor.
Youre late! Laura whispered as she saw Kate. What happened?
It was difficult to talk with so many people in the corridor.
Ill tell you later she began, and then froze as two men came through the door.
One of them was John, and the otherthe other
The other was her ex-husband!
Perhaps youd like to tell menow?
How well she remembered that smooth chocolate voice, with its underlying ice.
People were staring at her, Kate realised, and she fought off her sick shock.
John was looking anguished and uncomfortable. Sean, I think perhapsI am sure that
Arrogantly ignoring John, Sean demanded, In here! He was holding the door open, waiting for her to walk past him and into Johns office.
For a moment their gazes met and clashed, battled, topaz fighting dense blue for supremacy.
Her ex-husband was their new boss!
How could fate have dealt her such a low blow?
When Sean had walked out of her life to be with the woman he was leaving her for she had prayed that she would never, ever have to see him again. She had given him everything she had had to givedefying her aunt and uncle to be with him, helping and encouraging him, loving himbut that had not been enough for him. She had not been enough for him. The success she had helped him to achieve had meant that he no longer considered her good enough for him.
She was holding her breath and badly needed to exhale, but she was terrified that if she did she was going to start shakingand there was so way she was going to allow Sean to witness that kind of vulnerability.
How well she remembered that challenging hard-edged blue gaze. He had looked at her like that the first time they had met, defying her to ignore him. No one would dare to ignore him now.
Kate is a very She could hear John about to defend her.
Thank you, John. I shall deal with this myself, Sean announced curtly as she walked past him into the room, and he closed the door, excluding John from his own office.
Kate? he demanded grimly. What happened to Kathy?
Just hearing him say that name resurrected far too many painful memories. She had been Kathy when he had taunted her the first time they had met, for being too posh to dance with a man like him. And she had been Kathy too when he had taken her in his arms and shown herFiercely she pushed away the tormenting memories.
Tilting her chin, she said coldly, Kathy? She gave a mirthless laugh. She doesnt exist any longer, Sean. You destroyed her when you destroyed our marriage.
And your surname is? Sean wondered whether she could hear or understand the cause of the anger that was making his throat raw and his voice terse as he grappled with his own shock.
Kate Vincent, Kate answered him coldly.
Vincent? he questioned savagely.
Yes, Vincent. You didnt think I would want to keep your name, did you? And I certainly didnt want my aunt and unclesafter all, like you, they didnt want me.
So you remarried just to change your name?
Anger darkened Kates eyes as she heard the contempt in his voice.
Why were you late? Sean demanded abruptly. Didnt he want to let you out of his bed?
Furious colour scorched Kates face.
Just because you she began, and then stopped, swallowing hard as out of nowhere the memories started to fill her head. Sean waking her up in the morning with the gentlest of kissesthat was until she was fully awakeand then
She could feel the tension building up inside her body, a tension activated by memories crowding out the reality she was trying desperately hard to cling on to, to use as a bulwark.
A bulwark? Against what? The love she had once felt for Sean had been completely destroyed, and by Sean himself. Cruelly and deliberately. Her body stiffened with pride. She was glad that he thought she had found someone else. Married someone else.
Had he married the woman he had left her for?
Seans mobile rang, and he answered it, frowning briefly as he told Kate that she could go.
As she turned to leave Kate heard a female voice saying, quite clearly, Sean, darling
Kate was halfway through clearing out her desk when Laura came in.
What on earth are you doing? she demanded.
Clearing my desk. What does it look like? Kate responded tersely.
Youre leaving?
Kate could see how shocked and dismayed Laura was.
You mean hes sacked you just for being late?
Kate permitted herself a thin and slightly bitter smile. No, he hasnt sacked me, but lets just say Im leaving ahead of having him do so.
Oh, Kate, no! Laura protested, obviously upset. I can see that things have got off to bad start for you! She stopped, biting her lip and looking uncomfortable.
Laura would never make a politician, Kate reflected wryly, witnessing her colleagues discomfort.
Laura? she prodded firmly.
Well, Im sure he didnt mean anythingto be criticalor unkind. But I did hear Sean asking John where you were, Laura admitted reluctantly, adding quickly, Im sure hell be understanding, Kate. He seems such a sweetie, and so gorgeous.
A sweetie! Sean! Kate suppressed a bitter laugh.
Sean might be many things, but he had never been a sweetienot even when she had first known him.
A tough, streetwise, untamed rogue male, who could make a girl go weak at the knees and hot in places she hadnt previously known existed with just one taunting look, that was what he had been. And she
Her face started to burn as she recognised where her unwanted thoughts were leading. She switched on her computer and started to type.
Oh, thank goodness youve changed your mind, Laura began, with relief, but Kate shook her head.
No, I havent. Im just typing out my notice, Kate informed her crisply.
Your notice! Oh, Kate. Laura looked aghast, and immediately tried to dissuade her, but Kate refused to let herself be swayed.
Finishing her typing, she checked and then printed off her letter, placing it neatly in an envelope, which she put in the internal post tray.
Her task completed, she headed for the door.
Where are you going? Laura demanded anxiously.
Im leaving, Kate answered patiently. Ive written my resignation letter. As of now, I no longer work here!
But, Kate, you cant leave just like thatwithout telling anyone! Laura protested.
Watch me! Kate answered succinctly, walking calmly towards the door.
But inwardly she was feeling far from calm. Frantically she clamped down on her treacherous thoughts.
Kathy was working here! Sean paced the floor of his office, having terminated the call from the wife of his financial adviser. She had called to invite him to a dinner party she was planning, but Sean did not do dinner parties. His mouth twisted bitterly. Until he had met Kathy he hadnt even known the correct cutlery to use. She had been the one who had gently taught him. Gently rubbed off his rough edges. And he
He strode angrily over to the office window and stared out of it. He had deliberately not kept track of Kathy after their divorce. There hadnt been any point. The marriage had been over and he had made her a generous financial settlement, even if she had returned it to his solicitor intact. Who had she married? When had she married him?
He went back to the desk and picked up the personnel files he had not yet read.
CHAPTER TWO
AS SHE climbed out of her car Kate acknowledged that really there was no way she should have been driving. She was shaking from head to foot, and she had no real idea of how she had driven home. The entire journey had been a pain-fuelled blur of fighting back unwanted memories whilst surge after surge of panic and anger had washed through her.
Kate!
Kate tried to looked relaxed and smile as Carol, her friend and neighbour, came hurrying towards her.
What are you doing back so early? Carol asked, adding teasingly, Did the interview go so well that the new boss gave you the rest of the day off?
Kate opened her mouth to make a suitably lighthearted response, but to her chagrin she could feel her lips starting to tremble as emotions overwhelmed her.
Ive handed in my notice, she told Carol shakily. II had toMythe new boss is my ex-husband! Tears filled her eyes. She was shaking so violently she could have been in shock, Kate recognised distantly.
Come on, lets get you inside, she heard Carol announcing in a motherly voice. And then you can tell me all about it.
Ten minutes later, after she had made them both a cup of coffee and chatted calmly about their sons, Carol turned to Kate and said gently, Im not going to pry, Kate, but if you want to get it off your chest Im a good listener, and I promise it wont go any further. When Kate made no response, but simply continued to sit huddled in her chair, her hands gripping her coffee mug, Carol added quietly, Not even to Tom, if thats what you want.
Kate turned her head to look at her, her gaze blank and withdrawn, then forced herself to focus on her friend.
Taking a deep breath, she began to speak, slowly and painfully. I met Sean when I was eighteen. He was building an extension for my aunt and uncles neighbours. Wed had a very hot summer, and he worked bare-chested in a pair of old tight-fitting jeans
Mmm, sexy. I can picture the scene. Carol smiled encouragingly, relieved to see just the merest twitch of humour lifting Kates mouth.
I used to walk the long way round just so that I could see him, Kate admitted. I hadnt thought hed notice me, but then one night at a local club he was there and he asked me to dance. Fantasising over him when I walked past the building site was one thing. Being confronted with him there in front of me in the flesh was another! I felt intimidated by him. Kate gave small shrug and looked at Carol.
I was a na?ve eighteen-year-old virgin, and all that fierce, potent hot male sexuality was a bit overwhelming. Unfortunately he thought I was rejecting him, and She shook her head. I didnt know it then, but like me hed had a very unhappy and lonely childhood, which had left him with a bit of a chip on his shoulder and a determination to succeed. I can see now that I was a bit of a challenge to him, because I was a girl from a different background. A trophy girlfriend, I suppose the press would call it nowadays, and for a while I was good enough for him as just that. Good enough to marry, in fact. But once hed become very successful I think he began to realise that I wasnt much of a trophy after all, and that with his money he could afford a much, much better one than me.
Carol could hear the pain in Kates voice. You obviously loved him, she said softly.
Loved him? Kate looked at her starkly, her emotions darkening her eyes. Yes, I loved himtotally and completely, blindly and foolishly I realise now. Because I believed then that he felt the same way about me!
Oh, Kate! Carol sympathised, her own eyes prickling with emotion as she covered Kates cold folded hands with her own.
Kate swallowed and then continued. My aunt and uncle were furious when it came out that I was seeing himespecially my aunt. There was a dreadful row, and it came out that she had never liked my mother, had been appalled when she had married her brother. She told me that if I didnt agree to stop seeing Sean they would wash their hands of me and disown me. But I couldnt give Sean up. I loved him too much. He had become my whole world! And when I told him what my aunt had said he told me that he wasnt going to let me go back to them, to be hurt and bullied, that from now on he would look after me.
Kate exhaled in a deep sigh.
We were married six weeks later. Sean had finished the extension by then, and was ready to move on to his next job.
Carol could see the events of the day were beginning to catch up with Kate and, surveying her friends exhausted hollow-cheeked face, she stood up and told her firmly, Look, youre all in. Why dont you have a rest? Ill collect Oliver from nursery, if you like, and give him his tea.
Kate was tempted to refuse. But while a part of her was longing desperately to have the warm, solid feel of Olivers sturdy body in her arms, so that she could hold him and take comfort from his presence, another part of her said that this was not fair to her son and that she must not get into the habit of leaning on him emotionally. And anyway, she had things to do, she reminded herself grimly. Like finding a new job for a start!
Youre very kind, she told Carol wanly.
Nonsense. I know youd do the same for me.
She would, of course, but it was hardly likely that she would ever be asked to do so, Kate acknowledged wearily after Carol had gone. Carol had a loving husband, and George had two sets of adoring grandparents only too willing to spend as much time as they could with their grandson.
And Oliver only had her. No grandparents. Just her. Just her? What about Sean? He was Olivers father, after all, Kate reminded herself angrily.
Sean!
Her whole body felt heavy with misery and despair. She had struggled so hard, and it seemed so unfair that she should have her precious financial security snatched from her because her ex-husband had taken over the company.
For the first time since Sean had announced that their marriage was over Kate felt angry with herself for not accepting the generous pay-off he had offered her. Two million pounds and she had turned it down! She had turned it down not knowing that she was already pregnant with Oliver. And then, when she had realisedWell, she had sworn that she would never ask for anything from the man who had cold-bloodedly told her that he had changed his mind about wanting to be a father and that he had no desire to tie himself to a wife he no longer loved.
The pain was just as sharp as she remembered it being, and she stiffened against it. It should not exist any more. It should have been destroyed, just like Sean had destroyed their marriage.
All those things he had said to her and she had believed in; like how he, too, longed for children. All those promises he had made herthat those children, their children, would have the parental love neither of them had ever known. They had all been lies.
Against her will Kate could feel herself being drawn back into the past and its painful memories.
There had been no warning of what was to come, or of how vulnerable her happiness was. In fact only the previous month Sean had taken her away on an idyllic and very romantic break to an exclusive country house hotelto make up, he had told her lovingly, for the fact that the negotiations he had been involved in to secure a very valuable contract had gone on so long that they had not been able to have a summer holiday.
They had arrived late in the afternoon and had enjoyed a leisurely and very romantic walk through the grounds. And then they had gone back to their room and Sean had undressed her and made love to her.
They had been late for dinner, she rememberedvery late. And during it Sean had handed her a large brown envelope, telling her to open it. When she had done so she had found inside the sale details of a pretty Georgian rectory she and Sean had driven past early in the year.
You said it was the kind of place you had always wanted to live in, he had reminded her simply. Its coming up for sale.
Shed spent the rest of the evening in a daze, already excitedly planning how she would decorate the house, and insisting that Sean listen to her as she went through the house room by room.
They had made love again that night, and in the morning. And afterwards she had lain in Seans arms, her eyes closed, whilst she luxuriated in breathing in the sexually replete scent of him and wondered what on earth she had done to merit such happiness.
Less than a month later she had been wondering what on earth she had done to merit such intense pain.
One minuteor so she had thoughtSean had been negotiating for the purchase of the rectory; the next he had been telling her that he no longer loved her and that he intended to divorce her.
Kate closed her eyes and lay back in her chair. She felt both physically and emotionally exhausted. What she should be doing right now, she told herself grimly, was worrying about how she was going to get another job, instead of wallowing in self-pity about the past.
She would have to enrol with an employment agency, and then probably take on as much work as she could get until she found a permanent position. She had some savingsher rainy day moneybut that would not last for very long.
Why, why, why had Sean had to come back into her life like this? Hadnt he hurt her enough?
Tiredly Kate stopped trying to fight her exhaustion and allowed herself to drift off to sleep.
The dream was one she had had before. She tried to pull herself awake and out of it, as she had taught herself to do, but it was too late. It was rushing down on her, swamping her, and she was already lost in it.
She was with Sean, in the sitting room of their house. It was mid-afternoon and he had come home early from work. She ran to greet him, but he pushed her away, his expression not that of the husband she knew but that of the angry, aggressive man he had been when she had first met him.
Sean, whats wrong? she asked him, reaching out a hand to him and flinching as he ignored her loving gesture. He turned away from her and walked over to the window, blocking out its light. Uncomprehendingly she watched him, and the first tendrils of fear began to curl around her heart.
I want a divorce.
A divorce! NoWhat? Sean, what are you saying? she demanded, panic, shock and disbelief gripping hold of her throat and giving her voice a hoarse, choked sound that seemed to echo round the room.
Im saying that our marriage is over and I want a divorce.
No! No! You dont mean that. You cant mean that! Was that piteous little voice really her own? You love me.
I thought I did, Sean agreed coldly. But Ive realised that I dont. You and I want different things out of life, Kathy. You want children. Im sick of having to listen to you boring on about it. I dont want children!
Thats not true. How can you say that, Sean? She stared at him in disbelief, unable to understand what he was saying. Youve always said how much you want children, she reminded him shakily. We said we wanted a big family because our own childhoods
If he heard the pain in her voice and was affected by it he certainly didnt show it.
For Gods sake, he ground out. Grow up, will you, Kathy? When I said that Id have said anything to get into your knickers.
The contemptuous biting words flayed her sensitive emotions.
Look, I dont intend to argue about this. Our marriage is over and thats that. Ive already spoken to my solicitor. Youll be okay financially
Is there someone else?
Silently they looked at one another whilst Kathy prayed that he would say no, but instead he taunted her. What do you think?
Her whole body was shaking, and even though she didnt want to she started to cry, sobbing out Seans name in frantic pleading disbelief
Why the hell was he doing this? Seans hands clenched on the wheel as he drove. What was the point in risking resurrecting the past? She was easily replaceable. But Sean knew that he was being unfair. She was, according to John and from what he had been able to recognise himself, an extremely intelligent and diligent employeethe kind of employee, in fact, that he wanted. No way was he going to allow her to walk out of her job without working her statutory notice period.
She was his ex-wife, damn it, Sean reminded himself grimly. But this was nothing to do with her being his ex-wife, and nothing to do either with the fact that he had discovered from her records, contrary to his assumptions, she was not married.
He was in the village now, and his mouth hardened slightly. Oh, yes, this was exactly the kind of environment she liked. Small, cosy, homelyeverything that her life with her appalling aunt and uncle had not been.
He swung the car into a parking space he had spotted, stopped the engine and got out.
He hadnt told anyone as yet about the fact that she had handed in her notice. Officially she was still in the companys employin his employ.
He skirted the duck pond, his eyes bleak as he headed for Kates front door.
He was just about to knock when an elderly woman who had been watching him from her own front gate called out to him.
Youll have to go round the back, young man.
Young man! Sean grimaced. He didnt think he had ever been younghe had never been allowed to be young! And as for being a manSomething dark and dangerous hardened his whole face as he obeyed the elderly womans instructions.
It took him several minutes to find the path which ran behind the back gardens of the cottages. The gate to Kates wouldnt open at first, and then he realised that it was bolted on the inside and he had to reach over to unbolt it. Hardly a good anti-thief device, he reflected, giving it a frowning and derisory look as he unfastened it and walked up the path.
He frowned even more when he realised that the back door was slightly open. If Kate had had his upbringing she would have been a damn sight more safety conscious!
His hand was on the door when he heard her cry out his name.
He reacted immediately, thrusting open the door and striding into the kitchen, then coming to an abrupt halt when he saw her lying in the chair asleep. He felt as though all the air had been knocked out of his lungs, his chest tightening whilst he tried to draw in a ragged breath of air.
He had always loved watching her as she slept, absorbing the sight of her with a greedy secret pleasureher long dark lashes, lying silkily against her delicate skin, her lips slightly parted, her face turned to one side so that the whole of one pretty ear was visible. The very fact that she was asleep made her so vulnerable, showed how much she trusted him, showed how much she was in need of his protection
Without thinking Sean stepped forward, his hand lifting to push the heavy swathe of hair off her face, and then abruptly he realised that this was the present, not the past, and he stopped.
But it was too late. Somehow, as though she had sensed he was there, Kate cried out his name in great distress. For a second he hesitated, and then, taking a deep breath, he put his hand on her shoulder and gave her a small squeeze.
Immediately Kate woke up, and as she opened her eyes he demanded brusquely, Sean, what?
Kate stared up at him. Her dream was still fogging her brain, and it took her several valuable seconds to wake up fully, incomprehension clouding her eyes.
You were crying out my name, Sean prompted softly.
Kate felt a prickle of awareness run over her. And then the reality of what she had been dreaming hit her. Her face started to burn. All at once there was a dangerous tension in the small room.
I was dreaming, thats all, she defended herself sharply.
Do you often dream about me?
The danger was increasing by the heartbeat.
She could feel her skin tightening in reaction to his taunt. It was more of a nightmare, she retaliated quickly.
You havent remarried. He said it flatly, like an accusation, in an abrupt change of tack.
Clumsily Kate got to her feet. Even standing up she was still a long way short of his height. She cursed the fact that she was not wearing her heels, and felt the old bitterness mobilising inside her
Remarry? Do you really think I would want to risk marrying again after what you did to me? she demanded hotly. No, I havent remarried, and I never will.
And there was also a very good reason why she wouldnt, but she had no intention of telling him so. It was her son. Her precious Ollie was not going to be given a stepfather who might not love him. Kate had firsthand knowledge of what that felt like, and she was not going to subject her son to the same misery she had known whilst she was growing up.
Why did you change your name?
So he still had that same skill at slipping in those dangerous questions like a knife between the ribs. She wanted to shiver, but she folded her arms instead, not wanting him to see her bodys betrayal of her anxiety.
Why shouldnt I? I certainly didnt want your name, and I didnt want my aunt and uncles either, so I changed my name by deed poll to my mothers maiden name. What are you doing here anyway? she demanded angrily. You have no right
Ive come round here because of this, Sean said curtly, stopping her protests as he removed her letter of resignation from his jacket pocket, and with it another fat white envelope.
This is your contract of employment, he announced. It binds you to working a statutory notice period of four weeks. You cant just walk out on your job, Kate.
Kates mouth had gone dry, and she knew that her eyes were betraying her shock and her chagrin.
Youyou cant hold me to that, she began valiantly. You
Oh, yes, I can. Sean stopped her swiftly. And I fully intend to do so.
But why? Kate demanded wildly, stiffening as she heard in her own voice how close she was to the edge of her self-control. I should have thought youd want me gone as much as I want to go, given the speed with which you ended our marriage! You cant want me working for you. Your ex-wife, the woman you rejected? The woman you
Rules are rulesyou are legally obliged to work your notice and I want you back at your desk so that you can hand over your responsibilities to your replacement.
You cant make me! Kate protested. Her voice might sound strong and determined, but inside she was panicking, she recognised. She did, after all, have a legal obligation to work her notice period, and if she didnt it could cause other employers to think twice about taking her on. With Oliver to bring up she just could not afford to be out of work.
Yes, I can, Sean corrected her. You may have walked out on our marriage, but no way are you walking out of your job!
Kates shock deepened with every word he threw at her.
I left because you were having an affairyou know that. You were the one who ended our marriage, Sean.
Im not interested in discussing the past, only the present.
His response left her floundering and vulnerable. It had been a mistake to refer to their marriage, and even more of a mistake to mention his affair. The last thing she wanted was to have him taunt her with still suffering because of it.
I like value for my money, Kate. Surely you can remember that?
His comment gave her a much needed opportunity to hit back at him, and she took it.
I dont allow myself to remember anything about you. The angry, contemptuous words were out before she could stop herself from saying them. She could feel the tightening of the tension between them, and with it came dangerous memories of a very different kind of tension they had once shared.
Anything? Sean challenged her rawly, as though he had somehow read her thoughts. Not even this?
The feel of his hands on her arms, dragging her against his body, the heat of his flesh, the feel of his body itself against her own, was so shockingly and immediately familiar and welcome that she couldnt move.
Somehow, of its own volition, her body angled itself into Seans. Somehow her hands were sliding beneath his jacket and up over his back. Somehow her head was tilting back and her eyes were opening wide, so that she could look into the familiar hot, passionate blue of his.
Shockingly, it was as though a part of her had been waiting for this, for him, and not just waiting but wanting, longing, needing.
The steady tick of the kitchen clock was drowned out by the sound of their mingled breathing: Seans harsh and heavy; her own much lighter, shallow and unsteady.
The touch of his hand on the nape of her neck as his thumb slowly caressed her skin sent a signal to her body which it immediately answered.
Now she had to close her eyes, in case Sean could read in them what she could feelthe small, telling lift of her breasts as they surged in longing for his touch, the tight ache of her nipples as they hungered for his mouth, the swift clench of her belly and, lower than that, the softening swelling moistness of her sex.
She felt the hard warmth of his mouth and her own clung to it, her lips obediently parting to the fierce thrust of his tonguea feeling she remembered so well.
Her fingers clenched into his shoulders beneath his suit jacket as the familiar possessive pressure of his kiss silenced the moan of pleasure bubbling in her throat.
When his hands dropped to her hips, and his fingers curled round the slenderness of her bones, Kate went weak with longing. Soon he would be touching her breasts, tugging fiercely at her clothes in his hunger to touch her intimately. And she wanted him to. She wanted him to so much.
Fine shudders of eager longing were already surging rhythmically through her. If she slid her hand down from his back she could touch the hard readiness of him, stroke her fingers along it, tormenting him, tormenting them both until he picked her up and
Mummy?
The sound of Olivers voice from the other side of the back door jolted her back to reality.
Immediately Kate pulled back from Sean, and equally immediately he released her, so that when the door opened and Oliver came in, followed by Carol, they were standing three feet apart, ignoring one another.
Ollie wanted to come home, so Carol came to a halt as she saw Sean, and looked uncertainly at Kate.
Thanks, Carol. Kate bent down to receive the full weight of Olivers compact sturdy little-boy body as he ran towards her, only too glad of an excuse to conceal her face. Picking up Oliver, she avoided looking at both her neighbour and Sean.
ErIll be off, then, she heard Carol saying hurriedly as she backed out of the door.
Sean stared at the child in Kates arms in shocked disbelief. She had a childit was her child; he knew that. She had a child, which meantWhich meant that some other man must have
Oliver was wriggling in her arms and demanding to be put down. Reluctantly Kate gave in and did so. The moment his feet touched the floor he turned to look at Sean, and Kate felt as though her heart was being clenched in a hard, hurting fist when he demanded, Who are you?
Ollie, its bedtime, she told him firmly, and without looking at Sean she added, I would like you to leave.
I meant what I said about working for me, Kathy, Sean responded grimly.
Dont call me Kathy!
Too late Kate realised that Oliver was reacting to the anger in her voice. His eyes rounded and he put his hand in hers and stared at Sean. But her distress at upsetting him was nothing compared to the rage she felt when Sean told her curtly, Youre upsetting the boy!
To her shock, and before she could voice her fury, Sean bent down and picked Ollie up in his arms.
Kate waited for her son to struggle, as he always did when anyone unfamiliar touched him, but to her chagrin, instead of pulling away from Sean he leaned into him, looking at him gravely in silence before heaving a huge sigh and then saying determinedly, Story, please, man!
Kate felt as though her heart was going to break. Her ex-husband was holding their son, and Oliver was looking at his father as though he were all of his heroes rolled into one. The pain knifing into her was unbearable. She wanted to snatch Oliver out of Seans arms and hold him protectively in her own. Her poor baby didnt know that his father had rejected the very idea of him even before he was born!
Olivers friends father reads him a story when he comes home from work, she told Sean in a stilted voice, in explanation of her sons demand.
Oliver! She had even called the child by the name he hadAnd yet as he looked into the little boys solemn eyes Sean found it impossible to resent or hate him.
Story? he enquired, smiling at him and ignoring Kate.
Oliver nodded his head enthusiastically. Mummybook, he commanded imperiously, turning his head to look at Kate.
Please use proper sentences, Oliver, Kate reminded him automatically.
Mummy, give me book for man to read, please. Oliver smiled winningly and Kate could feel her whole body melting with love.
Sean has to go, she informed Oliver, automatically using Seans name without thinking. I will read you a story later.
No. Sean read Oliver story!
The frowning pout he was giving reinforced Kates awareness that her son was overtired, and all too likely to have one of his rare tantrums if he was thwartedthe very last thing she wanted him to do in front of Sean, who would no doubt enjoy seeing her in such an embarrassing situation.
Why dont you just give me the book?
The quiet voice and its soft tone made Kate turn her head and stare at Sean in surprise. Oliver was already lying against Seans shoulder.
It isnt really his bedtime yet, she said.
Is there a law which says he can only have a story at bedtime?
Mutely Kate shook her head, too caught up in the heart-wrenching sight of her son in his fathers arms to protest any further as she went to get Olivers favourite story book.
Half an hour later Sean nestled Oliver deeper into his arms and told Kate, By the looks of him he needs to be in bed.
Yes. Ill take him up.
Automatically she moved to take Oliver from him, but Sean shook his head.
Ill take him up. Just tell me which room.
Weakly, she did so.
As he laid Oliver down on his small bed Sean felt the ache of an old and powerful emotion he had thought safely destroyed. Kathys child. He could feel his eyes starting to blur and he blinked fiercely.
As he left the room he hesitated outside the other bedroom door, and then quickly opened it.
Where are you going? Thats my bedroom!
He hadnt heard Kate come up the stairs, and they confronted one another on the small landing.
And you sleep there alone? He couldnt stop himself from asking the question he knew he had no right to ask.
No. I dont! Kate turned her head, not wanting him to see the expression in her eyes and therefore missing the one in his. Sometimes Oliver comes in and gets into bed with me, she continued.
He had no valid reason to feel the way he did right now, Sean acknowledged, and no valid right either!
How do you manage on your own? I know you work full-time. He was frowning, looking as though he was genuinely concerned, and Kate turned away from him quickly and hurried towards the stairs. She wasnt going to make that mistake againthinking that Sean had real feelings.
I manage because I have to, for Olivers sake. Im all hes got
You mean his father abandoned you? His voice was harsh and almost condemning. He left you?
Kate could hardly believe the censure she could hear in his voice. Yes, he did, she agreed as calmly as she could, once they were both back downstairs. But personally I think that Ollie and I are better off without him.
She walked purposefully to the front door and unlocked it, pulling it open and making it clear that she wanted Sean to leave.
I want you back at your desk tomorrow morning, Sean warned her curtly.
Well, Im afraid Im not going to be there, Kate responded, equally curtly.
I warned you, Kate Sean began.
Tomorrow is Saturday, Sean, she reminded him dryly. We dont work weekends.
There was a small, telling pause, during which Kate wondered what the woman who now shared his life thought about the fact that he obviously worked seven days a week, and then he said, Very well. Monday morning, then, Kate. Be there, or face the consequences. He walked past her and out of the door.
CHAPTER THREE
NO! ANGRILY Kate sat up in bed. It was three oclock on Monday morning and she needed to be asleep, not lying there thinking about Sean, remembering how it had felt when he
No! she protested again, groaning in anguish as she rolled over and buried her face in her pillow. But it was no use; neither her memories nor her feelings were going to be ignored.
Well, if she couldnt ignore them then at least she could use them to remind herself of how Sean had hurt her. To inoculate herself against him doing so again, because on Friday, when he had kissed her, she had nearly forgiven him
She could feel the sharp quiver of sensation aching through her body. So her body remembered that Sean had been its lover, she acknowledged angrilywell, her heart had an equally good memory, if not an even better one, and what it remembered was the pain he had caused it.
But the love between them had been soso wonderful. Sean had been a passionate and exciting lover who had taught her things about her own body, as well as his, and their mutual capacity for pleasure had been something she had never even dreamed could exist.
Why was she torturing herself like this? And if she was doing it then why didnt she do it properly and remember just what it had felt like that first time he had made love to her?
After she had left her aunt and uncles houseshe had never thought of it as homeshe had moved into Seans small flat, but he had told her that he was not going to make love to her properly until they were married. Through the weeks and months when he had courted her he had steadfastly refused to take their passionately intense love-play to the conclusion she ached for, warning her thrillinglyfor herthat he was afraid that if he did so she would become pregnant.
Theres no way my baby is going to be born a bastard like I was, he had said grimly.
He had been reluctant to talk to her about his childhood at first, but she had slowly coaxed the painful truth out of him, and they had shared with one another their dream of creating for their own children the idyllic, love-filled childhood neither of them had known.
But we could use some contraception, she had suggested, pink-cheeked.
We could, but we arent going to, Sean had replied with that dangerously exciting hunger in his voice. Because when we make love, when you give yourself to me, Kathy, I want it to be skin to skin, not with a damn piece of rubber between us, he had told her earthily.
They had married in the small country town where her own long-dead mother had originally come froma wonderfully romantic gesture on Seans part, so far as Kate had been concerned. And in order to marry there they had had to live in the town for three weeks prior to the wedding. The completion of some work project had given Sean enough money to rent a small house for them.
Three weeks was an eternity when you were as passionately in love and as hungry for one other as they had been then, Kate acknowledged. But Sean had made sure that they did wait. He had had that kind of discipline and determination even then.
They had spent their wedding night completely alone in the small rented house. And it had been so perfect that even thinking about it now she could feel her eyes filling with tears of emotion.
Mummy.
The voice interrupted her wayward thoughts. Immediately Kate got out of her bed and hurried into Olivers room.
What is it, darling? she asked him lovingly.
My tummy hurts, he complained.
Kate tried not to sigh. Oliver was prone to upset tummies. Having checked that he was okay, she sat with him and soothed him, tensing when unexpectedly he asked her, Mummy, whens Sean going to come and see us again?
This was the first time Oliver had mentioned Sean, and she had managed to convince herself that her son had completely forgotten about him.
I dont know, Oliver. That was all she could find to say. She felt unable to tell Oliver that he would probably never see Sean again, even though she knew she ought to do so. She had always tried to answer his questions honestly, but this time she could not, and the reason for that was the look of shining anticipation in her little boys eyes.
By the time Oliver had gone back to sleep she was wide awake herself, her heart jumping uncomfortably inside her chest.
It couldnt be possible for Oliver to somehow sense that Sean was his father, could it? Her little boy couldnt have taken so uncharacteristically well to Sean because he felt some kind of special bond between them?
Its a wise child that knows its own father, Kate muttered grimly to herself, clinging to the old saying to protect her from her own wild imaginings.
Apprehensively, Kate parked her car and walked across the car park. The last person she wanted to see was Sean. Why had fate been so unkind as to bring him back into her life? She hated knowing that she was going to be working for him, but, as Carol had pointed out to her when she had told her what had happened, she could not afford to risk him carrying out his threat of pursuing her through the courts.
She nibbled anxiously on her bottom lip as she hurried into her office. Oliver had assured her that his tummy was better when he had woken up this morning, but she had still warned the nursery school teacher that he hadnt felt well during the night when she had dropped him off that morning.
Kate! Laura gave her a beaming smile as she came into the office and saw her. Youve changed your mind and youre going to stay after all!
You could say that! Our new boss made me an offer I couldnt refuse, Kate answered lightly, and then realised what she had done when she saw the curiosity in Lauras eyes.
He did? Laura sighed enviously. Dont you think hes just the most gorgeously, dangerously sexy-looking man you have ever seen? she added dreamily.
No, I do not! Kate responded, fighting to ignore the sudden backflip performed by her heart.
Well, if thats true you are the only female working here who doesnt, Laura told her forthrightly. And when you think that hes single and unattached
Now her heart was turning somersaults. Says who? she challenged her friend and colleague.
John, Laura informed her smugly. Apparently Sean told him himself.
Kate wondered what Laura would say if she were to tell her that, contrary to what Sean had told John, he had one very substantial attachment in the form of her son!
Sean was frowning as he ended his telephone conversation with his accountant. But it wasnt his business affairs that were causing him problems. He felt as though he was on an emotional see-sawsomething more appropriate for a callow youth than a man of his own age. Moreover, a man who considered himself totally fireproof as far as his emotions and his control over them were concerned.
When he had ended his marriage to Kate he had closed himself off completely from everything that concerned or involved her. He had deliberately and clinically expunged everything about her from his life. From his life, maybe, but what about from his heart?
Nothing had changed, he reminded himself angrily. The same reasons why he had divorced her still existed today, and would continue to exist for ever. Sean knew that he could never alter them. Nor forget them!
Pushing back his chair with an unusually uncoordinated movement, he got up and strode to the office window.
Was that really true? And if it was then what the hell had he been doing this weekend? He did not normally spend his weekends in toy stores, did he? And he certainly did not spend them doing idiotic things like buying ridiculously expensive train sets.
Sean closed his eyes and pushed his hands into his pockets, balling his fists in angry tension.
Okay, so he hadnt deliberately set out to buy the train set. And he had had every excuse to be in the large department store as he had gone there in order to replace some household items. It had been mere coincidence that the toy department was on the same floor as the television set he had been looking at. He didnt really need to put himself through rigorous self-analysis just because he had bought a train set, did he? After all, he had only bought the damn thing because he had felt embarrassed not to do so when the sales assistant had mistakenly thought he was interested in it!
And then he had got rid of it at the first opportunity.
A gleam of reluctant amusement lit his eyes as he recalled the expression on the face of the young boy he had given his embarrassing purchase to. His tired-looking mother had protested at first, but Sean had insisted. He just hoped she didnt think he had had any kind of ulterior motive for doing what he had done. Not that she wouldnt have been right to be suspicious of his motivesthey certainly would not withstand too much scrutiny! Dwelling on the past and buying toys just becauseJust because what? Just because the warm weight of Kates son in his arms had reactivated memories from a time in his life that
A time in his life that was over, Sean tried to remind himself. But the stark truth was already confronting him, even if he did not want to recognise or acknowledge it.
Fancy going to the pub for lunch?
Kate shook her head without lifting her gaze from her computer screen. Cant, Im afraid, Laura, she responded. I want to get this finished, and anyway Ive brought sandwiches.
Lunch at the pub with her co-workers would have been fun and relaxing, but as a single parent Kate was always conscious of having to watch her budget.
After Laura had gone, Kate got up and collected her sandwiches. The company provided a small restroom, equipped with tea-and coffee-making facilities and a microwave, for the workforce to use during their lunch and tea breaks. She had just reached the end of the corridor and had started to descend the narrow flight of stairs when suddenly Sean came out of one of the lower level offices and started to hurry up the stairs towards her.
To Kates dismay her reaction was immediate and intense, and unfortunately a relic from the days when they had been a couple. So much so, in fact, that she had taken the first of the few steps that would put her right in his path before she could stop herself.
Immediately she realised what she was doing and froze in pink-cheeked humiliation as a visual memory came vividly alive inside her head. A memory of Sean rushing up the stairs of their small house to grab her in his arms and swing her round in excitement before sliding her down the length of his body and beginning to kiss her with fierce sexual hunger.
Later they had gone on to celebrate the news he had brought herthat he had secured a new and lucrative contractin bed, with the champagne he had brought home
Red-faced, she pulled her thoughts back under control,
Kathy! Sean demanded grimly as he saw her shocked expression. What the hells? Whats wrong?
Alarmed, Kate tried to move away, but Sean stopped her, curling his fingers round her bare arm.
Its not Kathy any more, she reminded him sharply. Its Kate! And as for whats wrongdo you really need to ask me that?
She might be Kate now, but Kathy was still there inside her, Kate was forced to acknowledge. Because in direct contradiction of her angry words her body responded to Seans touch. Was it because no one had touched her since he had ended their marriage that her caress-starved flesh was quivering with such intense and voluptuous pleasure? Was it because it was Sean who was touching her? Or was it simply that when he had kissed her he had unleashed memories her body could not ignore? Kate wondered frantically.
Was it a past need her flesh was responding to, or was it a present one? She knew what she wanted the answer to be! But somehow she couldnt stop herself from stepping closer to him, exhaling on an unsteady sigh of pleasure. Sean was looking at her and she was looking back at him, with the mesmeric intensity of his blue gaze dizzying her.
She could feel his thumb caressing the inner curve of her elbow, just where he knew how vulnerable and responsive her flesh was to his touchso vulnerable and responsive that when he had used to kiss her there her whole body had melted with wanton longing.
It would be so easy, so natural, to walk into his arms now and feel them close protectively around her. To look into his eyes and wait for the familiar look of hot eagerness darken them, whilst his mouth curled into that special smile he had
A door opened noisily, bringing her back to reality. Abruptly she stepped back from Sean, her face burning. Maybe years ago she had not needed to hide her feelings from himher lover, her husband, her best friendnor her longing and sexual excitement when he looked at her and touched her. But things were different now, Kate reminded herself as she pulled away from him.
Whats that? she heard him demanding as he released her and frowned at the box she was carrying.
My lunch.
Lunch? In that? he derided grimly as he looked at the small plastic container. I should have thought for your sons sake you would want to make sure you ate properly.
As she listened to his ill-informed and critical words, her passionate response to him a few minutes earlier was swamped by outrage and anger.
For your informationnot that you have any right to question anything I choose to do any more, Seanit just so happens that it is for Ollies sake that this is my lunch, she told him, waving the plastic container defiantly. It costs money to bring up a childnot that youd know or care anything about that, since you chose not to burden yourself with children, she added sarcastically. And a packed lunch is a lot less expensive than going out to the pub. Whats wrong, Sean? she demanded when she saw his fixed expression. Or can I guess? You might come across to everyone else here as a caring, sharing employer, but I know different. And I also know, before you remind me, that you are rich enough to eat in the worlds most expensive restaurants these days. But there was a time when even a sandwich was a luxury for you.
.
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PENNY JORDAN
Penny Jordan needs no introduction as arguably the most recognisable name writing for Mills & Boon. We have celebrated her wonderful writing with a special collection, many of which for the first time in eBook format and all available right now.Kate arrives for a regular day at the office to be greeted by the new managing directornone other than her ex-husband!Billionaire businessman Sean Howard had been devastated when his marriage to Kate ended. Seeing her again he realises the physical attraction is still there, and with just one touch it can be re-ignited.Soon Kates not just sleeping with the bossshes become mistress to her husband!
Celebrate the legend that is bestselling author
PENNY JORDAN
Phenomenally successful author of more than two hundred books with sales of over a hundred million copies!
Penny Jordan's novels are loved by millions of readers all around the word in many different languages. Mills & Boon are proud to have published one hundred and eighty-seven novels and novellas written by Penny Jordan, who was a reader favourite right from her very first novel through to her last.
This beautiful digital collection offers a chance to recapture the pleasure of all of Penny Jordan's fabulous, glamorous and romantic novels for Mills & Boon.
Penny Jordan is one of Mills & Boon's most popular authors. Sadly, Penny died from cancer on 31st December 2011, aged sixty-five. She leaves an outstanding legacy, having sold over a hundred million books around the world. She wrote a total of one hundred and eighty-seven novels for Mills & Boon, including the phenomenally successful A Perfect Family, To Love, Honour & Betray, The Perfect Sinner and Power Play, which hit the Sunday Times and New York Times bestseller lists. Loved for her distinctive voice, her success was in part because she continually broke boundaries and evolved her writing to keep up with readers changing tastes. Publishers Weekly said about Jordan Women everywhere will find pieces of themselves in Jordan's characters and this perhaps explains her enduring appeal.
Although Penny was born in Preston, Lancashire and spent her childhood there, she moved to Cheshire as a teenager and continued to live there for the rest of her life. Following the death of her husband, she moved to the small traditional Cheshire market town on which she based her much-loved Crighton books.
Penny was a member and supporter of the Romantic Novelists Association and the Romance Writers of Americatwo organisations dedicated to providing support for both published and yet-to-be-published authors. Her significant contribution to women's fiction was recognised in 2011, when the Romantic Novelists Association presented Penny with a Lifetime Achievement Award.
Mistress to Her Husband
Penny Jordan
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
CHAPTER ONE
KATE youll never guess what! John told us this morning, whilst you were at the dentist. The business has been taken over. And the new boss is coming in tomorrow to interview everyone!
Kate Vincent digested her co-workers excited comments in silence. Dropping enviably thick, dark lashes reflectively over topaz eyes, she considered what she had been told. She had only been with the company for six months, as before that shed only been able to manage a part-time job whilst she was completing her Masters. With the qualification nicely enhancing her CV she had felt confident enough to apply for this post, which previously she would have considered out of her range.
So whos taking us over? Kate questioned Laura, absently flipping the smooth length of her chestnut-brown hair over her shoulder as she did so. It had been hot outside in the street, and the coolness of the offices air-conditioning was very welcome.
Well, John wouldnt say, Laura responded, suppressing a small envious sigh as she studied Kates elegantly slender body, clad in a neat white T-shirt teamed with a chocolate-brown linen skirt.
Laura had been with her when Kate had bought the skirt, an end-of-line sale buy which she herself would have deemed dull. But on Kate it looked not just good, but also somehow discreetly expensive.
Apparently everything has to be kept hush-hush until tomorrow. She gave Kate a rueful look.
I suppose we should have seen it coming. After all, John has been hinting for ages that hed like to take early retirementbut I never thought he was contemplating selling out. Mind you, he and Sheila dont have any children, do they? So I dont suppose theres much point in hanging on when they could be spending their time in that condo of theirs in Miami.
Kate listened intently to Laura as she booted up her computer. The business John Loames had set up to supply specialist facilities and equipment to the building trade had been very successful, but Kate had seen for herself since she had started to work for the small private company as its accounts executive that John was growing less and less inclined to seek out new contracts. Which was a pity, because she knew that the business had a great deal of potential, and she was not entirely surprised that someone had bought John out.
Everyones worried about what might happen, Laura confided to her. None of us want to lose our jobs.
Someone new taking over might not necessarily be a bad thing, Kate pointed out to her calmly. Theres ample room for the business to be expanded, and then there would be more than enough work for all of usprovided, of course, the new owner doesnt already own a similar business and just wants to amalgamate Johns with his own.
Oh, dont say that! Laura begged worriedly, giving a small shudder. Roy and I have only just increased our mortgage so that we can extend the house. Her face became slightly pink. Were trying for a family, and a baby will mean that we definitely need extra space. The last thing I need right now is to lose my job! Which reminds meJohn told us that he wants us all here especially early tomorrow. Apparently the new owner has said specifically that he will be here at eight.
Eight? Kate switched her attention from her e-mails to Laura, her forehead crinkling in a worried frown. Are you telling me John wants us here at eight?
Yes.
Kates porcelain-clear skin paled slightly. It was impossible for her to make it to the office for eight oclock in the morning. Pre-school didnt start until eight, and she would have to leave Ollie at seven-thirty at the very latest if she was to make it here for eight. She could feel the tension cramping her stomach.
It was hard enough for any mother to work full timea constant finely-judged balancing actbut when one added into that delicate balance the fact that the mother in question was a single parent, fighting desperately hard to give as much emotional security as two loving parents would, plus the fact that she had not told her employers that she had child, then that balancing act became dangerously unstable.
Just thinking about Ollie was enough to have her stomach twisting in knots of maternal protective anxiety.
Whats wrong? Laura asked curiously, sensing her tension.
Ernothing.
Kate hadnt told anyone at work about Ollie. All too sensitive to the attitude of colleagues and employers to the difficulties that came hand in hand with a worker who was a motherespecially a single motherKate had made no mention of her son during her interview with John. It had only been after she had started to work for the company that she had learned that John had a somewhat old-fashioned attitude about employing women with very young children. By then she had realised how well suited she was to her job, and it to her, and although it had caused her some sleepless nights and many qualms, she had decided to keep Ollies existence a secret. Since she was fiercely honest by nature, this decision had pricked her conscience on more than one occasion, but she had told herself that it was a necessary omission if she was to succeed with her career plans.
She was well qualified now, and she was determined to provide her son with at least some of the material benefits he would have enjoyed had his father not abandoned her.
His father! Kate could feel the cold sickness and despair laced with anger spewing up inside herit was a mixture as dangerous and toxic as arsenic, but she was the one it threatened to poison and destroy, not the man who had broken her heart and deserted her.
Now she considered that she and Oliver were better off without himeven though what she was earning only just covered the mortgage she was paying on the tiny cottage she had bought in a pretty village several miles away from the town and Olivers out-of-school childcare, leaving just enough for food and other essentials.
Childcare! Her lips, normally soft and sweetly curved, hardened and thinned. She was the best person to be providing her son with childcare, but she was not in a financial position to be able to do so.
Her current job was the first rung on the career ladder she was going to have to climb in order to support them both properly. The head of her department was due to retire in two years time, and Kate had secretly been hoping that if she did her job well enough John might promote her into the vacancy.
Her twenty-fifth birthday wasnt that far away, and neither was Ollies fifth. His fifth birthday and her fifth year of being alone, of being withoutSwiftly Kate buried the potentially damaging thoughts. She didnt need them, she didnt want them, and she damn well wasnt going to let them disturb her hard-won peace of mind.
It was her future she needed to focus on, and not her past! This takeover could destroy any chance she might have had of such a promotion, but it might also give her increased opportunities, she reflected, as she studied some comparison charts she had set up on her own initiative, to see which customers could be approached to increase their orders.
As she stood in the open doorway of the small village nursery and watched her son run towards her, his face lighting up as he saw her, Kate felt her heart contract with love. When she bent to scoop him up into her arms, and buried her face into the warm flesh of his neck to breathe in his delicious little-boy smell, she knew that no matter what sacrifices she had to make, or how hard she had to work, she would do it for Ollies sake.
A small frown pleated her forehead as she looked round the classroom, empty now of the other children. She had chosen to live in the village because she had wanted to provide Ollie with a sense of belonging and community, to provide him with the kind of childhood she herself had been denied. But living here meant she had to travel to the city to work, which in turn meant that Ollie had to wait for her long after the others had been collected.
She had never intended that her child should grow up like thisan only child with no family other than her. She had wanted things to be so different for her child, her children, than they had been for her.
Two loving parents, siblings, the sure knowledge of being loved and wanted. The sure knowledge of being loved and wanted!
Pain gripped her. It had been five yearssurely only a woman with no sense of self-worth or self-respect would allow herself to think about a man who had betrayed her love and rejected her? A man who had sworn love for ever, who had sworn that he shared her dreams and goals, who had taught her to trust and love him, and who had whispered against her lips as he took her virginal body that he wanted to give her his child, that he wanted to surround that child with love and security.
A man who had lied to her and left her brokenhearted, disillusioned, and completely alone.
To be with him she had gone against the wishes of the aunt and uncle who had brought her up, and because of that they had disowned her.
Not that Kate would have wanted her aunt and uncle involved in the life of her precious son. They might have given her a home when she had been orphaned, but they had done so out of duty and not love. And she had craved love so badly, so very badly.
Ollie was beginning to worry.
The faint hint of reproach in the nursery teachers voice made Kate wince inwardly.
I know Im a bit late, she apologised. There was an accident on the bypass.
The nursery teacher was comfortably round and in late middle age. She had grandchildren herself, and her small charges loved and respected her. Kate had lost count of the number of time she had heard Ollie insisting, But Mary says
Ten minutes later Kate was unlocking the door to their small cottage. It was right in the centre of the village, its front windows overlooking the green, with its duck pond, and at the back of the house a long narrow garden.
Ollie was a sturdily built child, with firm solid muscles and a head of thick black curls. An inheritance from his father, although Ollie himself did not know it.
So far as Kate was concerned the man who had fathered her son no longer existed, and she refused to allow him any place in their lives. Ollies placid nature meant that until recently he had accepted that he did not have a father, without asking Kate very many questions about him. However, the fact that his new best friend did have a father had led to Ollie starting to want to know more.
Kate frowned. So far Ollie had been content with her responses, but it made her heart ache to see the way he watched longingly whilst Tom Lawson played with his son.
Sean unfurled his long body from the seat of his Mercedes and stood still whilst he looked at the building in front of him.
His handmade Savile Row suit sat elegantly on his lean-limbed body, the jacket subtly masking the powerful breadth of his shoulders and the muscles he had built up in the years when he had earned his living hiring himself out to whichever builder would take him on.
His sweat had gone into the making of more than one motorway, as well as several housing estates, but even in those days as an ill-educated teenager he had promised himself that one day things would be different, that one day he would be the man giving the orders and not taking them.
As a young child hed literally had to fight for his food until, aged five, hed been abandoned by his hippie mother and been taken into care. In his twenties he had spent his days building extensions, and anything else he would get paid for, and his nights studying for a Business Studies degree. He had celebrated his thirty-first birthday by selling the building company he had built up from nothing for twenty million. Had he wanted to do so, he could have retired. But that was not his way. He had seen the potential of companies such as Johns and had seized the opportunities with both hands. He was now thirty-five.
He had big expansion plans for the business he had just acquired, but for his plans to succeed he needed the right kind of workforce. A dedicated, energetic, enthusiastic and ambitious workforce. This morning he was going to meet his new employees, and he was going to assess them in the same way he had assessed those who had worked for him when he had first set up in businessby meeting them face to face. Thenand only thenwould he read their personnel files.
He was an arrestingly good-looking man, but the early-morning sunlight picked out the harsh lines that slashed from his nose to his mouth and revealed a man of gritty determination who rarely smiled. He wore his obvious sexuality with open cynicism, and it glittered in the dense Celtic blue of his eyes now, as a young woman stopped walking to give him an appreciative and appraising look.
In the years since he had made his millions he had been pursued by some extraordinarily beautiful women, but Sean knew that they would have turned away in disgust and contempt from the young man he had once been.
Somethingpart bitterness and part paintook the warmth from his gaze and dulled its blueness.
He had come a long way from what he had once been. A long wayand yet still not far enough?
Locking his car, he started to stride towards the building.
Kate could feel perspiration beginning to dew her forehead as she willed the traffic lights to change. Her stomach was so tight with nervous anxiety that it hurt.
She had swallowed her normal pride last night and asked Carol, Ollies best friends mother, if she could leave Ollie with her at seven-thirty for her to take him on to school with her son George. The pain in her stomach intensified. She hated treating her precious son as though he was aa bundle of washing!
Why on earth had the new owner insisted on them arriving so early? Was he just unthinking, or uncaring? Whichever it was, it did not bode well for her future with the company, she decided fretfully.
As she reached the traffic lights she saw the broken-down car which had been the cause of the delay. It was already ten past eight, and it would take her at least another ten minutes to get to work.
Half past eight! Kate gritted her teeth as she hurried into the building. She was already walking fast, and she broke into an anxious run as she covered the last few yards. But the hope she had had that she might be able to slide discreetly into Johns office whilst the meeting was still in progress was destroyed as the door opened and her colleagues came out into the corridor.
Youre late! Laura whispered as she saw Kate. What happened?
It was difficult to talk with so many people in the corridor.
Ill tell you later she began, and then froze as two men came through the door.
One of them was John, and the otherthe other
The other was her ex-husband!
Perhaps youd like to tell menow?
How well she remembered that smooth chocolate voice, with its underlying ice.
People were staring at her, Kate realised, and she fought off her sick shock.
John was looking anguished and uncomfortable. Sean, I think perhapsI am sure that
Arrogantly ignoring John, Sean demanded, In here! He was holding the door open, waiting for her to walk past him and into Johns office.
For a moment their gazes met and clashed, battled, topaz fighting dense blue for supremacy.
Her ex-husband was their new boss!
How could fate have dealt her such a low blow?
When Sean had walked out of her life to be with the woman he was leaving her for she had prayed that she would never, ever have to see him again. She had given him everything she had had to givedefying her aunt and uncle to be with him, helping and encouraging him, loving himbut that had not been enough for him. She had not been enough for him. The success she had helped him to achieve had meant that he no longer considered her good enough for him.
She was holding her breath and badly needed to exhale, but she was terrified that if she did she was going to start shakingand there was so way she was going to allow Sean to witness that kind of vulnerability.
How well she remembered that challenging hard-edged blue gaze. He had looked at her like that the first time they had met, defying her to ignore him. No one would dare to ignore him now.
Kate is a very She could hear John about to defend her.
Thank you, John. I shall deal with this myself, Sean announced curtly as she walked past him into the room, and he closed the door, excluding John from his own office.
Kate? he demanded grimly. What happened to Kathy?
Just hearing him say that name resurrected far too many painful memories. She had been Kathy when he had taunted her the first time they had met, for being too posh to dance with a man like him. And she had been Kathy too when he had taken her in his arms and shown herFiercely she pushed away the tormenting memories.
Tilting her chin, she said coldly, Kathy? She gave a mirthless laugh. She doesnt exist any longer, Sean. You destroyed her when you destroyed our marriage.
And your surname is? Sean wondered whether she could hear or understand the cause of the anger that was making his throat raw and his voice terse as he grappled with his own shock.
Kate Vincent, Kate answered him coldly.
Vincent? he questioned savagely.
Yes, Vincent. You didnt think I would want to keep your name, did you? And I certainly didnt want my aunt and unclesafter all, like you, they didnt want me.
So you remarried just to change your name?
Anger darkened Kates eyes as she heard the contempt in his voice.
Why were you late? Sean demanded abruptly. Didnt he want to let you out of his bed?
Furious colour scorched Kates face.
Just because you she began, and then stopped, swallowing hard as out of nowhere the memories started to fill her head. Sean waking her up in the morning with the gentlest of kissesthat was until she was fully awakeand then
She could feel the tension building up inside her body, a tension activated by memories crowding out the reality she was trying desperately hard to cling on to, to use as a bulwark.
A bulwark? Against what? The love she had once felt for Sean had been completely destroyed, and by Sean himself. Cruelly and deliberately. Her body stiffened with pride. She was glad that he thought she had found someone else. Married someone else.
Had he married the woman he had left her for?
Seans mobile rang, and he answered it, frowning briefly as he told Kate that she could go.
As she turned to leave Kate heard a female voice saying, quite clearly, Sean, darling
Kate was halfway through clearing out her desk when Laura came in.
What on earth are you doing? she demanded.
Clearing my desk. What does it look like? Kate responded tersely.
Youre leaving?
Kate could see how shocked and dismayed Laura was.
You mean hes sacked you just for being late?
Kate permitted herself a thin and slightly bitter smile. No, he hasnt sacked me, but lets just say Im leaving ahead of having him do so.
Oh, Kate, no! Laura protested, obviously upset. I can see that things have got off to bad start for you! She stopped, biting her lip and looking uncomfortable.
Laura would never make a politician, Kate reflected wryly, witnessing her colleagues discomfort.
Laura? she prodded firmly.
Well, Im sure he didnt mean anythingto be criticalor unkind. But I did hear Sean asking John where you were, Laura admitted reluctantly, adding quickly, Im sure hell be understanding, Kate. He seems such a sweetie, and so gorgeous.
A sweetie! Sean! Kate suppressed a bitter laugh.
Sean might be many things, but he had never been a sweetienot even when she had first known him.
A tough, streetwise, untamed rogue male, who could make a girl go weak at the knees and hot in places she hadnt previously known existed with just one taunting look, that was what he had been. And she
Her face started to burn as she recognised where her unwanted thoughts were leading. She switched on her computer and started to type.
Oh, thank goodness youve changed your mind, Laura began, with relief, but Kate shook her head.
No, I havent. Im just typing out my notice, Kate informed her crisply.
Your notice! Oh, Kate. Laura looked aghast, and immediately tried to dissuade her, but Kate refused to let herself be swayed.
Finishing her typing, she checked and then printed off her letter, placing it neatly in an envelope, which she put in the internal post tray.
Her task completed, she headed for the door.
Where are you going? Laura demanded anxiously.
Im leaving, Kate answered patiently. Ive written my resignation letter. As of now, I no longer work here!
But, Kate, you cant leave just like thatwithout telling anyone! Laura protested.
Watch me! Kate answered succinctly, walking calmly towards the door.
But inwardly she was feeling far from calm. Frantically she clamped down on her treacherous thoughts.
Kathy was working here! Sean paced the floor of his office, having terminated the call from the wife of his financial adviser. She had called to invite him to a dinner party she was planning, but Sean did not do dinner parties. His mouth twisted bitterly. Until he had met Kathy he hadnt even known the correct cutlery to use. She had been the one who had gently taught him. Gently rubbed off his rough edges. And he
He strode angrily over to the office window and stared out of it. He had deliberately not kept track of Kathy after their divorce. There hadnt been any point. The marriage had been over and he had made her a generous financial settlement, even if she had returned it to his solicitor intact. Who had she married? When had she married him?
He went back to the desk and picked up the personnel files he had not yet read.
CHAPTER TWO
AS SHE climbed out of her car Kate acknowledged that really there was no way she should have been driving. She was shaking from head to foot, and she had no real idea of how she had driven home. The entire journey had been a pain-fuelled blur of fighting back unwanted memories whilst surge after surge of panic and anger had washed through her.
Kate!
Kate tried to looked relaxed and smile as Carol, her friend and neighbour, came hurrying towards her.
What are you doing back so early? Carol asked, adding teasingly, Did the interview go so well that the new boss gave you the rest of the day off?
Kate opened her mouth to make a suitably lighthearted response, but to her chagrin she could feel her lips starting to tremble as emotions overwhelmed her.
Ive handed in my notice, she told Carol shakily. II had toMythe new boss is my ex-husband! Tears filled her eyes. She was shaking so violently she could have been in shock, Kate recognised distantly.
Come on, lets get you inside, she heard Carol announcing in a motherly voice. And then you can tell me all about it.
Ten minutes later, after she had made them both a cup of coffee and chatted calmly about their sons, Carol turned to Kate and said gently, Im not going to pry, Kate, but if you want to get it off your chest Im a good listener, and I promise it wont go any further. When Kate made no response, but simply continued to sit huddled in her chair, her hands gripping her coffee mug, Carol added quietly, Not even to Tom, if thats what you want.
Kate turned her head to look at her, her gaze blank and withdrawn, then forced herself to focus on her friend.
Taking a deep breath, she began to speak, slowly and painfully. I met Sean when I was eighteen. He was building an extension for my aunt and uncles neighbours. Wed had a very hot summer, and he worked bare-chested in a pair of old tight-fitting jeans
Mmm, sexy. I can picture the scene. Carol smiled encouragingly, relieved to see just the merest twitch of humour lifting Kates mouth.
I used to walk the long way round just so that I could see him, Kate admitted. I hadnt thought hed notice me, but then one night at a local club he was there and he asked me to dance. Fantasising over him when I walked past the building site was one thing. Being confronted with him there in front of me in the flesh was another! I felt intimidated by him. Kate gave small shrug and looked at Carol.
I was a na?ve eighteen-year-old virgin, and all that fierce, potent hot male sexuality was a bit overwhelming. Unfortunately he thought I was rejecting him, and She shook her head. I didnt know it then, but like me hed had a very unhappy and lonely childhood, which had left him with a bit of a chip on his shoulder and a determination to succeed. I can see now that I was a bit of a challenge to him, because I was a girl from a different background. A trophy girlfriend, I suppose the press would call it nowadays, and for a while I was good enough for him as just that. Good enough to marry, in fact. But once hed become very successful I think he began to realise that I wasnt much of a trophy after all, and that with his money he could afford a much, much better one than me.
Carol could hear the pain in Kates voice. You obviously loved him, she said softly.
Loved him? Kate looked at her starkly, her emotions darkening her eyes. Yes, I loved himtotally and completely, blindly and foolishly I realise now. Because I believed then that he felt the same way about me!
Oh, Kate! Carol sympathised, her own eyes prickling with emotion as she covered Kates cold folded hands with her own.
Kate swallowed and then continued. My aunt and uncle were furious when it came out that I was seeing himespecially my aunt. There was a dreadful row, and it came out that she had never liked my mother, had been appalled when she had married her brother. She told me that if I didnt agree to stop seeing Sean they would wash their hands of me and disown me. But I couldnt give Sean up. I loved him too much. He had become my whole world! And when I told him what my aunt had said he told me that he wasnt going to let me go back to them, to be hurt and bullied, that from now on he would look after me.
Kate exhaled in a deep sigh.
We were married six weeks later. Sean had finished the extension by then, and was ready to move on to his next job.
Carol could see the events of the day were beginning to catch up with Kate and, surveying her friends exhausted hollow-cheeked face, she stood up and told her firmly, Look, youre all in. Why dont you have a rest? Ill collect Oliver from nursery, if you like, and give him his tea.
Kate was tempted to refuse. But while a part of her was longing desperately to have the warm, solid feel of Olivers sturdy body in her arms, so that she could hold him and take comfort from his presence, another part of her said that this was not fair to her son and that she must not get into the habit of leaning on him emotionally. And anyway, she had things to do, she reminded herself grimly. Like finding a new job for a start!
Youre very kind, she told Carol wanly.
Nonsense. I know youd do the same for me.
She would, of course, but it was hardly likely that she would ever be asked to do so, Kate acknowledged wearily after Carol had gone. Carol had a loving husband, and George had two sets of adoring grandparents only too willing to spend as much time as they could with their grandson.
And Oliver only had her. No grandparents. Just her. Just her? What about Sean? He was Olivers father, after all, Kate reminded herself angrily.
Sean!
Her whole body felt heavy with misery and despair. She had struggled so hard, and it seemed so unfair that she should have her precious financial security snatched from her because her ex-husband had taken over the company.
For the first time since Sean had announced that their marriage was over Kate felt angry with herself for not accepting the generous pay-off he had offered her. Two million pounds and she had turned it down! She had turned it down not knowing that she was already pregnant with Oliver. And then, when she had realisedWell, she had sworn that she would never ask for anything from the man who had cold-bloodedly told her that he had changed his mind about wanting to be a father and that he had no desire to tie himself to a wife he no longer loved.
The pain was just as sharp as she remembered it being, and she stiffened against it. It should not exist any more. It should have been destroyed, just like Sean had destroyed their marriage.
All those things he had said to her and she had believed in; like how he, too, longed for children. All those promises he had made herthat those children, their children, would have the parental love neither of them had ever known. They had all been lies.
Against her will Kate could feel herself being drawn back into the past and its painful memories.
There had been no warning of what was to come, or of how vulnerable her happiness was. In fact only the previous month Sean had taken her away on an idyllic and very romantic break to an exclusive country house hotelto make up, he had told her lovingly, for the fact that the negotiations he had been involved in to secure a very valuable contract had gone on so long that they had not been able to have a summer holiday.
They had arrived late in the afternoon and had enjoyed a leisurely and very romantic walk through the grounds. And then they had gone back to their room and Sean had undressed her and made love to her.
They had been late for dinner, she rememberedvery late. And during it Sean had handed her a large brown envelope, telling her to open it. When she had done so she had found inside the sale details of a pretty Georgian rectory she and Sean had driven past early in the year.
You said it was the kind of place you had always wanted to live in, he had reminded her simply. Its coming up for sale.
Shed spent the rest of the evening in a daze, already excitedly planning how she would decorate the house, and insisting that Sean listen to her as she went through the house room by room.
They had made love again that night, and in the morning. And afterwards she had lain in Seans arms, her eyes closed, whilst she luxuriated in breathing in the sexually replete scent of him and wondered what on earth she had done to merit such happiness.
Less than a month later she had been wondering what on earth she had done to merit such intense pain.
One minuteor so she had thoughtSean had been negotiating for the purchase of the rectory; the next he had been telling her that he no longer loved her and that he intended to divorce her.
Kate closed her eyes and lay back in her chair. She felt both physically and emotionally exhausted. What she should be doing right now, she told herself grimly, was worrying about how she was going to get another job, instead of wallowing in self-pity about the past.
She would have to enrol with an employment agency, and then probably take on as much work as she could get until she found a permanent position. She had some savingsher rainy day moneybut that would not last for very long.
Why, why, why had Sean had to come back into her life like this? Hadnt he hurt her enough?
Tiredly Kate stopped trying to fight her exhaustion and allowed herself to drift off to sleep.
The dream was one she had had before. She tried to pull herself awake and out of it, as she had taught herself to do, but it was too late. It was rushing down on her, swamping her, and she was already lost in it.
She was with Sean, in the sitting room of their house. It was mid-afternoon and he had come home early from work. She ran to greet him, but he pushed her away, his expression not that of the husband she knew but that of the angry, aggressive man he had been when she had first met him.
Sean, whats wrong? she asked him, reaching out a hand to him and flinching as he ignored her loving gesture. He turned away from her and walked over to the window, blocking out its light. Uncomprehendingly she watched him, and the first tendrils of fear began to curl around her heart.
I want a divorce.
A divorce! NoWhat? Sean, what are you saying? she demanded, panic, shock and disbelief gripping hold of her throat and giving her voice a hoarse, choked sound that seemed to echo round the room.
Im saying that our marriage is over and I want a divorce.
No! No! You dont mean that. You cant mean that! Was that piteous little voice really her own? You love me.
I thought I did, Sean agreed coldly. But Ive realised that I dont. You and I want different things out of life, Kathy. You want children. Im sick of having to listen to you boring on about it. I dont want children!
Thats not true. How can you say that, Sean? She stared at him in disbelief, unable to understand what he was saying. Youve always said how much you want children, she reminded him shakily. We said we wanted a big family because our own childhoods
If he heard the pain in her voice and was affected by it he certainly didnt show it.
For Gods sake, he ground out. Grow up, will you, Kathy? When I said that Id have said anything to get into your knickers.
The contemptuous biting words flayed her sensitive emotions.
Look, I dont intend to argue about this. Our marriage is over and thats that. Ive already spoken to my solicitor. Youll be okay financially
Is there someone else?
Silently they looked at one another whilst Kathy prayed that he would say no, but instead he taunted her. What do you think?
Her whole body was shaking, and even though she didnt want to she started to cry, sobbing out Seans name in frantic pleading disbelief
Why the hell was he doing this? Seans hands clenched on the wheel as he drove. What was the point in risking resurrecting the past? She was easily replaceable. But Sean knew that he was being unfair. She was, according to John and from what he had been able to recognise himself, an extremely intelligent and diligent employeethe kind of employee, in fact, that he wanted. No way was he going to allow her to walk out of her job without working her statutory notice period.
She was his ex-wife, damn it, Sean reminded himself grimly. But this was nothing to do with her being his ex-wife, and nothing to do either with the fact that he had discovered from her records, contrary to his assumptions, she was not married.
He was in the village now, and his mouth hardened slightly. Oh, yes, this was exactly the kind of environment she liked. Small, cosy, homelyeverything that her life with her appalling aunt and uncle had not been.
He swung the car into a parking space he had spotted, stopped the engine and got out.
He hadnt told anyone as yet about the fact that she had handed in her notice. Officially she was still in the companys employin his employ.
He skirted the duck pond, his eyes bleak as he headed for Kates front door.
He was just about to knock when an elderly woman who had been watching him from her own front gate called out to him.
Youll have to go round the back, young man.
Young man! Sean grimaced. He didnt think he had ever been younghe had never been allowed to be young! And as for being a manSomething dark and dangerous hardened his whole face as he obeyed the elderly womans instructions.
It took him several minutes to find the path which ran behind the back gardens of the cottages. The gate to Kates wouldnt open at first, and then he realised that it was bolted on the inside and he had to reach over to unbolt it. Hardly a good anti-thief device, he reflected, giving it a frowning and derisory look as he unfastened it and walked up the path.
He frowned even more when he realised that the back door was slightly open. If Kate had had his upbringing she would have been a damn sight more safety conscious!
His hand was on the door when he heard her cry out his name.
He reacted immediately, thrusting open the door and striding into the kitchen, then coming to an abrupt halt when he saw her lying in the chair asleep. He felt as though all the air had been knocked out of his lungs, his chest tightening whilst he tried to draw in a ragged breath of air.
He had always loved watching her as she slept, absorbing the sight of her with a greedy secret pleasureher long dark lashes, lying silkily against her delicate skin, her lips slightly parted, her face turned to one side so that the whole of one pretty ear was visible. The very fact that she was asleep made her so vulnerable, showed how much she trusted him, showed how much she was in need of his protection
Without thinking Sean stepped forward, his hand lifting to push the heavy swathe of hair off her face, and then abruptly he realised that this was the present, not the past, and he stopped.
But it was too late. Somehow, as though she had sensed he was there, Kate cried out his name in great distress. For a second he hesitated, and then, taking a deep breath, he put his hand on her shoulder and gave her a small squeeze.
Immediately Kate woke up, and as she opened her eyes he demanded brusquely, Sean, what?
Kate stared up at him. Her dream was still fogging her brain, and it took her several valuable seconds to wake up fully, incomprehension clouding her eyes.
You were crying out my name, Sean prompted softly.
Kate felt a prickle of awareness run over her. And then the reality of what she had been dreaming hit her. Her face started to burn. All at once there was a dangerous tension in the small room.
I was dreaming, thats all, she defended herself sharply.
Do you often dream about me?
The danger was increasing by the heartbeat.
She could feel her skin tightening in reaction to his taunt. It was more of a nightmare, she retaliated quickly.
You havent remarried. He said it flatly, like an accusation, in an abrupt change of tack.
Clumsily Kate got to her feet. Even standing up she was still a long way short of his height. She cursed the fact that she was not wearing her heels, and felt the old bitterness mobilising inside her
Remarry? Do you really think I would want to risk marrying again after what you did to me? she demanded hotly. No, I havent remarried, and I never will.
And there was also a very good reason why she wouldnt, but she had no intention of telling him so. It was her son. Her precious Ollie was not going to be given a stepfather who might not love him. Kate had firsthand knowledge of what that felt like, and she was not going to subject her son to the same misery she had known whilst she was growing up.
Why did you change your name?
So he still had that same skill at slipping in those dangerous questions like a knife between the ribs. She wanted to shiver, but she folded her arms instead, not wanting him to see her bodys betrayal of her anxiety.
Why shouldnt I? I certainly didnt want your name, and I didnt want my aunt and uncles either, so I changed my name by deed poll to my mothers maiden name. What are you doing here anyway? she demanded angrily. You have no right
Ive come round here because of this, Sean said curtly, stopping her protests as he removed her letter of resignation from his jacket pocket, and with it another fat white envelope.
This is your contract of employment, he announced. It binds you to working a statutory notice period of four weeks. You cant just walk out on your job, Kate.
Kates mouth had gone dry, and she knew that her eyes were betraying her shock and her chagrin.
Youyou cant hold me to that, she began valiantly. You
Oh, yes, I can. Sean stopped her swiftly. And I fully intend to do so.
But why? Kate demanded wildly, stiffening as she heard in her own voice how close she was to the edge of her self-control. I should have thought youd want me gone as much as I want to go, given the speed with which you ended our marriage! You cant want me working for you. Your ex-wife, the woman you rejected? The woman you
Rules are rulesyou are legally obliged to work your notice and I want you back at your desk so that you can hand over your responsibilities to your replacement.
You cant make me! Kate protested. Her voice might sound strong and determined, but inside she was panicking, she recognised. She did, after all, have a legal obligation to work her notice period, and if she didnt it could cause other employers to think twice about taking her on. With Oliver to bring up she just could not afford to be out of work.
Yes, I can, Sean corrected her. You may have walked out on our marriage, but no way are you walking out of your job!
Kates shock deepened with every word he threw at her.
I left because you were having an affairyou know that. You were the one who ended our marriage, Sean.
Im not interested in discussing the past, only the present.
His response left her floundering and vulnerable. It had been a mistake to refer to their marriage, and even more of a mistake to mention his affair. The last thing she wanted was to have him taunt her with still suffering because of it.
I like value for my money, Kate. Surely you can remember that?
His comment gave her a much needed opportunity to hit back at him, and she took it.
I dont allow myself to remember anything about you. The angry, contemptuous words were out before she could stop herself from saying them. She could feel the tightening of the tension between them, and with it came dangerous memories of a very different kind of tension they had once shared.
Anything? Sean challenged her rawly, as though he had somehow read her thoughts. Not even this?
The feel of his hands on her arms, dragging her against his body, the heat of his flesh, the feel of his body itself against her own, was so shockingly and immediately familiar and welcome that she couldnt move.
Somehow, of its own volition, her body angled itself into Seans. Somehow her hands were sliding beneath his jacket and up over his back. Somehow her head was tilting back and her eyes were opening wide, so that she could look into the familiar hot, passionate blue of his.
Shockingly, it was as though a part of her had been waiting for this, for him, and not just waiting but wanting, longing, needing.
The steady tick of the kitchen clock was drowned out by the sound of their mingled breathing: Seans harsh and heavy; her own much lighter, shallow and unsteady.
The touch of his hand on the nape of her neck as his thumb slowly caressed her skin sent a signal to her body which it immediately answered.
Now she had to close her eyes, in case Sean could read in them what she could feelthe small, telling lift of her breasts as they surged in longing for his touch, the tight ache of her nipples as they hungered for his mouth, the swift clench of her belly and, lower than that, the softening swelling moistness of her sex.
She felt the hard warmth of his mouth and her own clung to it, her lips obediently parting to the fierce thrust of his tonguea feeling she remembered so well.
Her fingers clenched into his shoulders beneath his suit jacket as the familiar possessive pressure of his kiss silenced the moan of pleasure bubbling in her throat.
When his hands dropped to her hips, and his fingers curled round the slenderness of her bones, Kate went weak with longing. Soon he would be touching her breasts, tugging fiercely at her clothes in his hunger to touch her intimately. And she wanted him to. She wanted him to so much.
Fine shudders of eager longing were already surging rhythmically through her. If she slid her hand down from his back she could touch the hard readiness of him, stroke her fingers along it, tormenting him, tormenting them both until he picked her up and
Mummy?
The sound of Olivers voice from the other side of the back door jolted her back to reality.
Immediately Kate pulled back from Sean, and equally immediately he released her, so that when the door opened and Oliver came in, followed by Carol, they were standing three feet apart, ignoring one another.
Ollie wanted to come home, so Carol came to a halt as she saw Sean, and looked uncertainly at Kate.
Thanks, Carol. Kate bent down to receive the full weight of Olivers compact sturdy little-boy body as he ran towards her, only too glad of an excuse to conceal her face. Picking up Oliver, she avoided looking at both her neighbour and Sean.
ErIll be off, then, she heard Carol saying hurriedly as she backed out of the door.
Sean stared at the child in Kates arms in shocked disbelief. She had a childit was her child; he knew that. She had a child, which meantWhich meant that some other man must have
Oliver was wriggling in her arms and demanding to be put down. Reluctantly Kate gave in and did so. The moment his feet touched the floor he turned to look at Sean, and Kate felt as though her heart was being clenched in a hard, hurting fist when he demanded, Who are you?
Ollie, its bedtime, she told him firmly, and without looking at Sean she added, I would like you to leave.
I meant what I said about working for me, Kathy, Sean responded grimly.
Dont call me Kathy!
Too late Kate realised that Oliver was reacting to the anger in her voice. His eyes rounded and he put his hand in hers and stared at Sean. But her distress at upsetting him was nothing compared to the rage she felt when Sean told her curtly, Youre upsetting the boy!
To her shock, and before she could voice her fury, Sean bent down and picked Ollie up in his arms.
Kate waited for her son to struggle, as he always did when anyone unfamiliar touched him, but to her chagrin, instead of pulling away from Sean he leaned into him, looking at him gravely in silence before heaving a huge sigh and then saying determinedly, Story, please, man!
Kate felt as though her heart was going to break. Her ex-husband was holding their son, and Oliver was looking at his father as though he were all of his heroes rolled into one. The pain knifing into her was unbearable. She wanted to snatch Oliver out of Seans arms and hold him protectively in her own. Her poor baby didnt know that his father had rejected the very idea of him even before he was born!
Olivers friends father reads him a story when he comes home from work, she told Sean in a stilted voice, in explanation of her sons demand.
Oliver! She had even called the child by the name he hadAnd yet as he looked into the little boys solemn eyes Sean found it impossible to resent or hate him.
Story? he enquired, smiling at him and ignoring Kate.
Oliver nodded his head enthusiastically. Mummybook, he commanded imperiously, turning his head to look at Kate.
Please use proper sentences, Oliver, Kate reminded him automatically.
Mummy, give me book for man to read, please. Oliver smiled winningly and Kate could feel her whole body melting with love.
Sean has to go, she informed Oliver, automatically using Seans name without thinking. I will read you a story later.
No. Sean read Oliver story!
The frowning pout he was giving reinforced Kates awareness that her son was overtired, and all too likely to have one of his rare tantrums if he was thwartedthe very last thing she wanted him to do in front of Sean, who would no doubt enjoy seeing her in such an embarrassing situation.
Why dont you just give me the book?
The quiet voice and its soft tone made Kate turn her head and stare at Sean in surprise. Oliver was already lying against Seans shoulder.
It isnt really his bedtime yet, she said.
Is there a law which says he can only have a story at bedtime?
Mutely Kate shook her head, too caught up in the heart-wrenching sight of her son in his fathers arms to protest any further as she went to get Olivers favourite story book.
Half an hour later Sean nestled Oliver deeper into his arms and told Kate, By the looks of him he needs to be in bed.
Yes. Ill take him up.
Automatically she moved to take Oliver from him, but Sean shook his head.
Ill take him up. Just tell me which room.
Weakly, she did so.
As he laid Oliver down on his small bed Sean felt the ache of an old and powerful emotion he had thought safely destroyed. Kathys child. He could feel his eyes starting to blur and he blinked fiercely.
As he left the room he hesitated outside the other bedroom door, and then quickly opened it.
Where are you going? Thats my bedroom!
He hadnt heard Kate come up the stairs, and they confronted one another on the small landing.
And you sleep there alone? He couldnt stop himself from asking the question he knew he had no right to ask.
No. I dont! Kate turned her head, not wanting him to see the expression in her eyes and therefore missing the one in his. Sometimes Oliver comes in and gets into bed with me, she continued.
He had no valid reason to feel the way he did right now, Sean acknowledged, and no valid right either!
How do you manage on your own? I know you work full-time. He was frowning, looking as though he was genuinely concerned, and Kate turned away from him quickly and hurried towards the stairs. She wasnt going to make that mistake againthinking that Sean had real feelings.
I manage because I have to, for Olivers sake. Im all hes got
You mean his father abandoned you? His voice was harsh and almost condemning. He left you?
Kate could hardly believe the censure she could hear in his voice. Yes, he did, she agreed as calmly as she could, once they were both back downstairs. But personally I think that Ollie and I are better off without him.
She walked purposefully to the front door and unlocked it, pulling it open and making it clear that she wanted Sean to leave.
I want you back at your desk tomorrow morning, Sean warned her curtly.
Well, Im afraid Im not going to be there, Kate responded, equally curtly.
I warned you, Kate Sean began.
Tomorrow is Saturday, Sean, she reminded him dryly. We dont work weekends.
There was a small, telling pause, during which Kate wondered what the woman who now shared his life thought about the fact that he obviously worked seven days a week, and then he said, Very well. Monday morning, then, Kate. Be there, or face the consequences. He walked past her and out of the door.
CHAPTER THREE
NO! ANGRILY Kate sat up in bed. It was three oclock on Monday morning and she needed to be asleep, not lying there thinking about Sean, remembering how it had felt when he
No! she protested again, groaning in anguish as she rolled over and buried her face in her pillow. But it was no use; neither her memories nor her feelings were going to be ignored.
Well, if she couldnt ignore them then at least she could use them to remind herself of how Sean had hurt her. To inoculate herself against him doing so again, because on Friday, when he had kissed her, she had nearly forgiven him
She could feel the sharp quiver of sensation aching through her body. So her body remembered that Sean had been its lover, she acknowledged angrilywell, her heart had an equally good memory, if not an even better one, and what it remembered was the pain he had caused it.
But the love between them had been soso wonderful. Sean had been a passionate and exciting lover who had taught her things about her own body, as well as his, and their mutual capacity for pleasure had been something she had never even dreamed could exist.
Why was she torturing herself like this? And if she was doing it then why didnt she do it properly and remember just what it had felt like that first time he had made love to her?
After she had left her aunt and uncles houseshe had never thought of it as homeshe had moved into Seans small flat, but he had told her that he was not going to make love to her properly until they were married. Through the weeks and months when he had courted her he had steadfastly refused to take their passionately intense love-play to the conclusion she ached for, warning her thrillinglyfor herthat he was afraid that if he did so she would become pregnant.
Theres no way my baby is going to be born a bastard like I was, he had said grimly.
He had been reluctant to talk to her about his childhood at first, but she had slowly coaxed the painful truth out of him, and they had shared with one another their dream of creating for their own children the idyllic, love-filled childhood neither of them had known.
But we could use some contraception, she had suggested, pink-cheeked.
We could, but we arent going to, Sean had replied with that dangerously exciting hunger in his voice. Because when we make love, when you give yourself to me, Kathy, I want it to be skin to skin, not with a damn piece of rubber between us, he had told her earthily.
They had married in the small country town where her own long-dead mother had originally come froma wonderfully romantic gesture on Seans part, so far as Kate had been concerned. And in order to marry there they had had to live in the town for three weeks prior to the wedding. The completion of some work project had given Sean enough money to rent a small house for them.
Three weeks was an eternity when you were as passionately in love and as hungry for one other as they had been then, Kate acknowledged. But Sean had made sure that they did wait. He had had that kind of discipline and determination even then.
They had spent their wedding night completely alone in the small rented house. And it had been so perfect that even thinking about it now she could feel her eyes filling with tears of emotion.
Mummy.
The voice interrupted her wayward thoughts. Immediately Kate got out of her bed and hurried into Olivers room.
What is it, darling? she asked him lovingly.
My tummy hurts, he complained.
Kate tried not to sigh. Oliver was prone to upset tummies. Having checked that he was okay, she sat with him and soothed him, tensing when unexpectedly he asked her, Mummy, whens Sean going to come and see us again?
This was the first time Oliver had mentioned Sean, and she had managed to convince herself that her son had completely forgotten about him.
I dont know, Oliver. That was all she could find to say. She felt unable to tell Oliver that he would probably never see Sean again, even though she knew she ought to do so. She had always tried to answer his questions honestly, but this time she could not, and the reason for that was the look of shining anticipation in her little boys eyes.
By the time Oliver had gone back to sleep she was wide awake herself, her heart jumping uncomfortably inside her chest.
It couldnt be possible for Oliver to somehow sense that Sean was his father, could it? Her little boy couldnt have taken so uncharacteristically well to Sean because he felt some kind of special bond between them?
Its a wise child that knows its own father, Kate muttered grimly to herself, clinging to the old saying to protect her from her own wild imaginings.
Apprehensively, Kate parked her car and walked across the car park. The last person she wanted to see was Sean. Why had fate been so unkind as to bring him back into her life? She hated knowing that she was going to be working for him, but, as Carol had pointed out to her when she had told her what had happened, she could not afford to risk him carrying out his threat of pursuing her through the courts.
She nibbled anxiously on her bottom lip as she hurried into her office. Oliver had assured her that his tummy was better when he had woken up this morning, but she had still warned the nursery school teacher that he hadnt felt well during the night when she had dropped him off that morning.
Kate! Laura gave her a beaming smile as she came into the office and saw her. Youve changed your mind and youre going to stay after all!
You could say that! Our new boss made me an offer I couldnt refuse, Kate answered lightly, and then realised what she had done when she saw the curiosity in Lauras eyes.
He did? Laura sighed enviously. Dont you think hes just the most gorgeously, dangerously sexy-looking man you have ever seen? she added dreamily.
No, I do not! Kate responded, fighting to ignore the sudden backflip performed by her heart.
Well, if thats true you are the only female working here who doesnt, Laura told her forthrightly. And when you think that hes single and unattached
Now her heart was turning somersaults. Says who? she challenged her friend and colleague.
John, Laura informed her smugly. Apparently Sean told him himself.
Kate wondered what Laura would say if she were to tell her that, contrary to what Sean had told John, he had one very substantial attachment in the form of her son!
Sean was frowning as he ended his telephone conversation with his accountant. But it wasnt his business affairs that were causing him problems. He felt as though he was on an emotional see-sawsomething more appropriate for a callow youth than a man of his own age. Moreover, a man who considered himself totally fireproof as far as his emotions and his control over them were concerned.
When he had ended his marriage to Kate he had closed himself off completely from everything that concerned or involved her. He had deliberately and clinically expunged everything about her from his life. From his life, maybe, but what about from his heart?
Nothing had changed, he reminded himself angrily. The same reasons why he had divorced her still existed today, and would continue to exist for ever. Sean knew that he could never alter them. Nor forget them!
Pushing back his chair with an unusually uncoordinated movement, he got up and strode to the office window.
Was that really true? And if it was then what the hell had he been doing this weekend? He did not normally spend his weekends in toy stores, did he? And he certainly did not spend them doing idiotic things like buying ridiculously expensive train sets.
Sean closed his eyes and pushed his hands into his pockets, balling his fists in angry tension.
Okay, so he hadnt deliberately set out to buy the train set. And he had had every excuse to be in the large department store as he had gone there in order to replace some household items. It had been mere coincidence that the toy department was on the same floor as the television set he had been looking at. He didnt really need to put himself through rigorous self-analysis just because he had bought a train set, did he? After all, he had only bought the damn thing because he had felt embarrassed not to do so when the sales assistant had mistakenly thought he was interested in it!
And then he had got rid of it at the first opportunity.
A gleam of reluctant amusement lit his eyes as he recalled the expression on the face of the young boy he had given his embarrassing purchase to. His tired-looking mother had protested at first, but Sean had insisted. He just hoped she didnt think he had had any kind of ulterior motive for doing what he had done. Not that she wouldnt have been right to be suspicious of his motivesthey certainly would not withstand too much scrutiny! Dwelling on the past and buying toys just becauseJust because what? Just because the warm weight of Kates son in his arms had reactivated memories from a time in his life that
A time in his life that was over, Sean tried to remind himself. But the stark truth was already confronting him, even if he did not want to recognise or acknowledge it.
Fancy going to the pub for lunch?
Kate shook her head without lifting her gaze from her computer screen. Cant, Im afraid, Laura, she responded. I want to get this finished, and anyway Ive brought sandwiches.
Lunch at the pub with her co-workers would have been fun and relaxing, but as a single parent Kate was always conscious of having to watch her budget.
After Laura had gone, Kate got up and collected her sandwiches. The company provided a small restroom, equipped with tea-and coffee-making facilities and a microwave, for the workforce to use during their lunch and tea breaks. She had just reached the end of the corridor and had started to descend the narrow flight of stairs when suddenly Sean came out of one of the lower level offices and started to hurry up the stairs towards her.
To Kates dismay her reaction was immediate and intense, and unfortunately a relic from the days when they had been a couple. So much so, in fact, that she had taken the first of the few steps that would put her right in his path before she could stop herself.
Immediately she realised what she was doing and froze in pink-cheeked humiliation as a visual memory came vividly alive inside her head. A memory of Sean rushing up the stairs of their small house to grab her in his arms and swing her round in excitement before sliding her down the length of his body and beginning to kiss her with fierce sexual hunger.
Later they had gone on to celebrate the news he had brought herthat he had secured a new and lucrative contractin bed, with the champagne he had brought home
Red-faced, she pulled her thoughts back under control,
Kathy! Sean demanded grimly as he saw her shocked expression. What the hells? Whats wrong?
Alarmed, Kate tried to move away, but Sean stopped her, curling his fingers round her bare arm.
Its not Kathy any more, she reminded him sharply. Its Kate! And as for whats wrongdo you really need to ask me that?
She might be Kate now, but Kathy was still there inside her, Kate was forced to acknowledge. Because in direct contradiction of her angry words her body responded to Seans touch. Was it because no one had touched her since he had ended their marriage that her caress-starved flesh was quivering with such intense and voluptuous pleasure? Was it because it was Sean who was touching her? Or was it simply that when he had kissed her he had unleashed memories her body could not ignore? Kate wondered frantically.
Was it a past need her flesh was responding to, or was it a present one? She knew what she wanted the answer to be! But somehow she couldnt stop herself from stepping closer to him, exhaling on an unsteady sigh of pleasure. Sean was looking at her and she was looking back at him, with the mesmeric intensity of his blue gaze dizzying her.
She could feel his thumb caressing the inner curve of her elbow, just where he knew how vulnerable and responsive her flesh was to his touchso vulnerable and responsive that when he had used to kiss her there her whole body had melted with wanton longing.
It would be so easy, so natural, to walk into his arms now and feel them close protectively around her. To look into his eyes and wait for the familiar look of hot eagerness darken them, whilst his mouth curled into that special smile he had
A door opened noisily, bringing her back to reality. Abruptly she stepped back from Sean, her face burning. Maybe years ago she had not needed to hide her feelings from himher lover, her husband, her best friendnor her longing and sexual excitement when he looked at her and touched her. But things were different now, Kate reminded herself as she pulled away from him.
Whats that? she heard him demanding as he released her and frowned at the box she was carrying.
My lunch.
Lunch? In that? he derided grimly as he looked at the small plastic container. I should have thought for your sons sake you would want to make sure you ate properly.
As she listened to his ill-informed and critical words, her passionate response to him a few minutes earlier was swamped by outrage and anger.
For your informationnot that you have any right to question anything I choose to do any more, Seanit just so happens that it is for Ollies sake that this is my lunch, she told him, waving the plastic container defiantly. It costs money to bring up a childnot that youd know or care anything about that, since you chose not to burden yourself with children, she added sarcastically. And a packed lunch is a lot less expensive than going out to the pub. Whats wrong, Sean? she demanded when she saw his fixed expression. Or can I guess? You might come across to everyone else here as a caring, sharing employer, but I know different. And I also know, before you remind me, that you are rich enough to eat in the worlds most expensive restaurants these days. But there was a time when even a sandwich was a luxury for you.
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Пенни Джордан
Тип: электронная книга
Жанр: Современная зарубежная литература
Язык: на английском языке
Издательство: HarperCollins
Дата публикации: 16.04.2024
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О книге: Penny Jordan needs no introduction as arguably the most recognisable name writing for Mills & Boon. We have celebrated her wonderful writing with a special collection, many of which for the first time in eBook format and all available right now.Kate arrives for a regular day at the office to be greeted by the new managing director—none other than her ex-husband!Billionaire businessman Sean Howard had been devastated when his marriage to Kate ended. Seeing her again he realises the physical attraction is still there, and with just one touch it can be re-ignited.Soon Kate’s not just sleeping with the boss—she’s become mistress to her husband!