Finding Our Forever
Finding Our Forever
Brenda Novak
New York Times bestselling author Brenda Novak welcomes readers to the town of Silver Springs, where surprises wait around every corner!The search for her birth mother brought Cora Kelly to the New Horizons Boys Ranch. Getting a job there was easy enough, but confiding in Aiyana, the ranch’s owner, that she's really her daughter? Cora's not sure she can do that, not unless she's confident the news will be welcomed. And once she gets to know Elijah Turner—Aiyana's adopted son and ranch manager—that decision becomes even more difficult.Although Elijah can’t deny his deep attraction to Cora, he's always struggled with trust. Anyone with his past would, and there's something about the ranch’s newest employee that isn't exactly as it seems. But if the feelings she awakes in his guarded heart are any indication, she might be just what he’s long been waiting for.
New York Times bestselling author Brenda Novak welcomes readers to the town of Silver Springs, where surprises wait around every corner!
The search for her birth mother brought Cora Kelly to the New Horizons Boys Ranch. Getting a job there was easy enough, but confiding in Aiyana, the ranch’s owner, that she’s really her daughter? Cora’s not sure she can do that, not unless she’s confident the news will be welcomed. And once she gets to know Elijah Turner—Aiyana’s adopted son and ranch manager—that decision becomes even more difficult.
Although Elijah can’t deny his deep attraction to Cora, he’s always struggled with trust. Anyone with his past would, and there’s something about the ranch’s newest employee that isn’t exactly as it seems. But if the feelings she awakes in his guarded heart are any indication, she might be just what he’s long been waiting for.
“So I’d only get hurt if I got involved with you,” Cora said.
“Yes. You’d essentially be getting a locked box.”
He was being transparent, completely up-front. She was the one who’d set that tone. So it surprised him when she barked out a laugh. “You think you’re doing me a favor by staying away!”
He was trying to adhere to the decisions he’d made after that last ugly blowout with Tina. He’d been glad for the peace and balance he’d found since they’d broken up a year ago. But twelve months was a long time to go without a woman... “Essentially.”
“Well, you’re taking a lot for granted, Mr. Turner. First of all, how do you know I’m going to want you to love me?”
“Experience,” he said wryly. “I have yet to encounter the opposite problem.”
* * *
Silver Springs: Where love changes everything!
Finding Our Forever
Brenda Novak
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
New York Times and USA TODAY bestselling author BRENDA NOVAK is the author of more than fifty books. A five-time RITA® Award nominee, she has won many awards, including the National Readers’ Choice Award, the Booksellers’ Best Award and the Silver Bullet Award. She also runs Brenda Novak for the Cure, a charity to raise money for diabetes research (her youngest son has this disease). To date, she’s raised $2.5 million. For more about Brenda, please visit www.brendanovak.com (http://www.brendanovak.com).
To all lost/hurt boys.
May you find an Aiyana Turner in your life.
Contents
Cover (#ua82f7d75-d60a-5981-b297-acd7004bd84b)
Back Cover Text (#u5e51a521-f4f5-52c7-9c14-8b19db262c60)
Introduction (#u9c2cb738-3e2a-5f96-b2ba-c22c2b427b34)
Title Page (#u9ea2d10f-b6c9-52e1-a666-50e24b96c619)
About the Author (#u6a7c4412-613a-595d-89c4-dbd0f2cfb070)
Dedication (#u4258acf0-8361-512f-be61-44968cbd7784)
Chapter One (#u870b2905-2075-5a1a-82b2-255d63ad4051)
Chapter Two (#u810effed-894b-5687-8024-fc16fd40b257)
Chapter Three (#ubd7c4d58-cbd8-5bdb-ae68-e8517001d531)
Chapter Four (#uf35d5803-5897-565f-9b34-fc14c14948d1)
Chapter Five (#ub09b72a9-7994-5817-9793-3cd70619436f)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fifteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Sixteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seventeen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eighteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nineteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twenty (#litres_trial_promo)
Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)
Extract (#litres_trial_promo)
Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter One (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
Cora Kelly had never met her birth mother.
The records had been sealed when she was adopted as a newborn twenty-eight years ago. Her adoptive mother didn’t even know her birth mother’s name, so it wasn’t as if Lilly Kelly had ever mentioned it. Cora had had very little to go on. Even with two different attorneys, a website designed to help families reconnect and a private investigator who’d taken her case for free since he was an adoptee himself and did what he could, in his spare time, to help others who’d been through the same thing, it’d taken six long years to glean the information she craved. But here she was, only moments away from coming face-to-face, for the first time since the day she was born, with the woman who’d brought her into this world.
Would she like her mother? Would they resemble each other more in person than in the one picture she’d seen? Would Aiyana Turner somehow recognize her for who she was?
Those questions churned in Cora’s mind, making her stomach churn, as well. But one question weighed heavier than the others: Was she making a mistake?
Wiping her palms on her slacks, she told herself to calm down. As far as Aiyana knew, they were only meeting to talk about Cora’s new job working as an art instructor at New Horizons Boys Ranch, a boarding school for troubled teens, ages fourteen to eighteen, ninety minutes outside LA. No way would Aiyana have any reason to suspect Cora’s true identity. And Cora didn’t plan to tell her who she was. Not today. Maybe not ever. That was why she’d sought this job—and accepted it. So she’d have the chance to see what she might be getting into before making that decision.
Hopefully, her mother would be someone she could admire, at least. From what she could tell, Aiyana had done a lot to help teenage boys who acted out, some who’d been orphaned as well as many who hadn’t. Her work as executive administrator of the school she’d founded twenty years ago seemed to be her one true love. She’d never been married, and she’d never had any more of her own children. According to a newspaper article honoring Aiyana on the anniversary of the date the boys ranch opened, something the private detective who finally solved the mystery of Aiyana’s identity had provided, Aiyana had adopted quite a few of the residents who’d come to the school through the years—eight of them, so far. The oldest, Elijah Turner, was now a man in his early thirties. He helped run New Horizons. Cora knew because he was the person who’d interviewed and then hired her. That was why she hadn’t yet met Aiyana. Aiyana had been out of town when Cora came two weeks ago.
“I’m sorry it’s taking a few moments. Ms. Turner is on an unexpected but important call.” The receptionist, a gray-haired woman who had to be in her sixties, smiled kindly as she imparted this apology. “I can’t imagine it’ll be much longer.”
Hauling in a deep breath, Cora smiled. “It’s fine. I don’t mind waiting.” She didn’t mind, except that she was beginning to fear she’d have a heart attack right there outside of Aiyana Turner’s office. Somehow, she had to stem her anxiety...
“Are you too warm, dear? I can turn down the air...”
She glanced up at the receptionist again—and realized she’d been fanning herself. “Um...no. I’m okay, thanks,” she said and dropped her hand.
“It’s been hot this summer.”
“Yes, it’s particularly warm today,” Cora said, but it was generally worse where she lived in Burbank. Along with Jill, her best friend, Cora rented a small condo just outside of Hollywood, where her adoptive parents still owned the lovely four-bedroom home where she’d been raised.
She felt a twinge of guilt when she thought of her parents, Brad and Lilly. They’d been good to her, treated her just like her brother, who was two years older and their biological child. They wouldn’t be pleased that she’d landed this job if they knew the driving force behind it.
Don’t think about that. What they don’t know can’t hurt them. It would be premature to drag them into this, anyway, since she had no idea where it might go. For all she knew, it wouldn’t go anywhere. And maybe that was for the best. Several years ago, when she’d first mentioned that she’d like to find her birth mother, Brad and Lilly had acted shocked and disappointed. They’d taken it personally, didn’t understand that they didn’t do anything to cause the emptiness inside her and weren’t the ones who could fix it. The hole was just there, and Cora felt it would be until she could figure out where she came from, who she was and where she belonged.
She hoped this would help. Her boyfriend—ex-boyfriend since she’d broken up with him last month—claimed it was her personal problems that’d destroyed their two-year relationship. He said she needed to let go of her past and move on, that she could be opening Pandora’s box.
He could be right. But it was too late to change her plans. She’d already made a yearlong commitment to New Horizons. Today’s meeting with Aiyana was merely a formality—an orientation, of sorts. Cora had given notice that she’d be vacating her condo at the end of the month, at which point her friend would get a new roommate and she’d move to Silver Springs, a town of only 5,000 people located slightly east of Santa Barbara.
After spending her whole life in the big city, Cora wasn’t sure she’d like living in such a rural area, but if she had to pick a small town, this one wasn’t bad. Known for its robust arts community, the renovation of its downtown, its clean water, green energy, recreation and quaint small businesses, there was a lot to recommend it. Life was just slower. Those who didn’t grow up here came to retire, raise a family in a “safe place” or enjoy the beauty of the surrounding mountains—
“Ms. Kelly?”
Cora’s heart jumped into her throat. The drone of the voice she’d heard coming from the inner office had fallen silent. This was it! The receptionist was about to tell her she could go in...
“Yes?”
“Ms. Turner will see you now.”
For a moment, Cora’s determination faltered. But when she didn’t move, the receptionist—Betty May, according to the placard on her desk—stood expectantly. “It’s right through here,” she said with a puzzled expression.
Swallowing to ease her dry throat, Cora nodded. “Right. I was just...” About to run the other way... Letting her words fall off, since she couldn’t readily lay her mind upon a good excuse, she threw back her shoulders and crossed the room to step inside an expansive office with several rows of pictures on the wall—every graduating class of New Horizons.
Those pictures melted into the background as soon as Cora’s eyes landed on the diminutive woman with long black hair that fell in a braid down her back. This was where she’d gotten the golden color of her skin, Cora thought as she stared. That detail hadn’t been quite so apparent in the grainy picture she’d seen with that newspaper article, but her mother appeared to be part Mexican, South American or maybe Native American.
Wasn’t that something she should’ve had a right to know without having to go to all the trouble and expense she did?
Cora had always been conscious of the difference in her skin tone compared to the Kellys. Lilly had blond hair and blue eyes and, like many of her friends, had indulged in a fair amount of Botox and cosmetic surgery. Aiyana, on the other hand, didn’t look as though she’d ever altered anything.
“Ms. Kelly, I’m so sorry for making you wait. That call was about another candidate for the school. Considering the mischief he’s been in, I figured I should handle it as soon as possible. His poor grandmother, who’s raising him, is beside herself.”
Cora blinked rapidly, battling a sudden upwelling of emotion. She’d longed for this day. And here it was. She was looking at her mother.
But she couldn’t act strange or she might give herself away. What had Aiyana just said? Something about the wait and the reason for it... “Of course,” she managed to respond, dragging what she’d heard out of short-term memory before it could disappear into the ether. “I understand that the welfare of the boys has to come first.”
Aiyana’s smile as she gestured toward the chair on the other side of her desk suggested she appreciated Cora’s response. “Please, take a seat.”
Cora could hardly pull her gaze away long enough to sit without missing the chair.
“Eli tells me—”
“Eli?” Cora echoed.
“Elijah,” she clarified. “My son.”
“Oh right.” Aiyana was talking about the incredibly handsome but imposing man who’d interviewed Cora two weeks ago. If only Cora could think clearly, she would’ve made that connection as instantly as she should have. He’d certainly left an impression.
“He told me you graduated from the University of San Diego with a BA in art education six years ago.”
“Yes. I love art, and I love teaching, so...putting the two together seemed like a natural for me.”
“You’ve been working as a substitute since then?”
“That’s right. When I first graduated, I was grateful for the flexibility subbing gave me, because I was doing a bit of traveling with my parents. Since then it’s been difficult to find a full-time position, given that so many schools are cutting back on their art, music and sports programs.”
“I understand. So that’s why you answered our ad?”
One of the reasons—though not the most important. Ironically enough, she’d been offered a full-time position for the coming year at the school for which she’d substituted most often, so she’d no longer needed the opportunity. The art teacher at Woodbridge High was retiring and had put in a good word for her. But, to her parents’ consternation, Cora had turned it down. Aiyana was here. That meant New Horizons offered something no other school could. “Yes.”
Aiyana peered at her more closely. “Is something wrong?”
Tears were getting the best of her despite all her efforts to suppress them. “Allergies,” Cora explained. “It’s that time of year. Fortunately, they don’t last long.”
“Would you like me to get you a tissue?”
Cora used her finger to remove the tear that was about to roll down her cheek. “No, I’m fine. My eyes are just...a little itchy, that’s all.”
“Let me know if you change your mind,” she said. “I’ll get you something if you need it. Meanwhile, I’d like to talk to you about the importance we place on art here at the ranch. Most other schools focus on core subjects, and as an accredited high school, we certainly make that a priority here, too. But it’s my feeling that our students cannot excel in those classes—in anything—if they’re too broken to care or try. I believe in healing those who will be healed by showing them the beauty of life and giving them a healthy form of expression. I guess it would be safe to say that, around here, you aren’t merely an extra, the first teacher to go when the budget gets tight. You are our most important teacher, which is why I asked to meet with you before you started in a couple of weeks.”
“I admire your philosophy.” Cora agreed with it, too. But hearing that she was the most important teacher at the ranch was intimidating, since this was her first full-time position.
“I want my boys to be educated,” Aiyana continued, “but even more than that, I want them to be whole, to find peace.”
“Makes sense to me.”
“Good. I should warn you that most have never been introduced to drawing, painting or pottery. They think school has to be boring and hard, which is what makes it so rewarding to introduce them to the fun side of learning. Creative endeavors are one of the best tools we have to ease the pain and anger that’s inside so many of them.”
“Does that mean all of the students here come from a difficult background?” she asked.
“Quite a few. Some have been abandoned. Some have been abused. Some have behavioral issues that can’t be blamed on any of those things.”
“You mean like autism.”
“We have a few autistic students but only those who are highly functioning. More often it’s something else—a chemical imbalance, genetic factors. No one can say for sure. Some brains are just wired differently than others.”
“Those boys must be the toughest to reach.”
“Sometimes we don’t reach them at all. But, that said, we’re going to reach all we can.”
Cora could easily imagine the rich parents of a boy who had behavioral problems being willing to pay a large sum to enroll him at the ranch. But how could orphans afford such a school? “What about the costs associated with coming here—for those who don’t have parents, I mean? Does another member of the family pay for it? Or maybe the state?”
“We get some state assistance, we have private benefactors and we do two big fund-raisers a year. As much as thirty percent of our students come here without paying a dime. This year, that equates to eighty students. But as long as we can meet our monthly expenses, I’m satisfied. If we have extra, I’d much rather use it to try to save another boy.”
Cora almost felt guilty that she’d be taking a salary. She nearly spoke up to say she could make do with less, but she knew that wasn’t the case. In LA, she’d been able to augment her income by waiting tables on the weekends. Chances were, in such a small community, she wouldn’t have the opportunity to get a second job. “That’s very noble of you.”
Aiyana gestured as if she wasn’t interested in praise. “I only mention it so that you’ll understand what’s important to me. It isn’t turning a profit—it’s making a difference. And I’m looking to work with people who are as invested in the progress of these boys as I am.”
“I understand. I’ll do my best,” Cora said. “But...why have you focused exclusively on helping boys? Why not girls? Or girls and boys? Do you have a strong gender preference or—”
“No. Not at all. I didn’t want the added responsibility of mixing the two genders, knew it wouldn’t be easy to keep them apart,” she said with a chuckle. “The boys who come here have enough to worry about without adding that kind of temptation. This is a time for them to focus on getting their lives in order. Hopefully, as a result, they’ll make better husbands and fathers later.”
“You’re saying it was purely a practical decision.”
“Absolutely. Someday, on the opposite side of town, I’d like to open a school exclusively for girls, and do essentially the same thing. Now that I have Elijah handling so much around here, that’s more of a possibility than ever before. I just haven’t geared up for the push it will require.”
“I’m sure you’ll do equally well with girls.” At least now she knew that her mother hadn’t given her up because she didn’t like girls. Perhaps that’d been a silly thought to begin with, but Cora couldn’t help searching for The Reason. Maybe that was all she really needed to know in order to be satisfied...
“We’ll see. Now, I’ve been told you’ll be moving into the housing on campus. But have you seen where you’ll be living?”
“Not yet. Mr. Turner showed me the school and some other parts of the property, but he didn’t offer me the position until after I got home, so we didn’t go inside the faculty housing.”
“Well, the cottages aren’t big, by any stretch of the imagination, but I like being able to include them in the package we offer our teachers. I figure discounted rent might tempt them into staying for a while.” She grinned. “Longer than a year.”
This comment revealed that Aiyana was well aware of her arrangement with Elijah. “It’s a nice benefit.”
“You’ll find we’re more like a family here than what you’ve most likely experienced in the past,” she said with a wink.
A family... Those two words nearly caused Cora to burst into tears. Aiyana had no idea how literal their connection was.
As Cora followed Aiyana out of the building, she couldn’t help thinking back, over all the different ways she’d imagined her mother while growing up. As a drug addict who didn’t care about anything except her next hit. As a prostitute eager to rid herself of the child from an unwanted pregnancy. As “the other woman,” abandoned by her lover after telling him she was going to have his child. As a businesswoman who refused to allow motherhood to get in the way of her ambition. There were more, but each scenario provided a ready excuse for adoption. She’d never pictured Aiyana like she was—soft-spoken, seemingly wise, well educated, accomplished, stable, kind, loving and devoted to a cause.
Cora had expected that just by meeting her mother so many of her questions would be answered. But she was more baffled than ever. What happened twenty-eight years ago? Why would someone like Aiyana Turner put her only child up for adoption?
Chapter Two (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
“So...do you like the woman you’ll be working for?”
Cora was packing up the kitchen of her condo in Burbank with Lilly when Lilly asked this question. For a second, Cora froze, fearing her adoptive mother had figured out the reason she was moving to Silver Springs. But when Lilly kept wrapping glasses in newspaper and putting them into the box she was filling, it became apparent she was merely making conversation. She didn’t know—not yet, thank goodness.
“I do.” She forced a smile despite the discomfort her deception caused. “She seems really nice.” Although Cora had been home for a week, getting ready for her big move, she hadn’t been able to quit thinking about Aiyana. She’d spent nearly every extra minute on the internet, doing searches on all of the teachers and many of the students who’d graduated from New Horizons—whatever names she could cull from their website, including a graduate who had turned into a professional football player, one who’d just recently been accused of killing the couple who adopted him when he came to the ranch at fifteen and Elijah Turner, who’d hired her. Only one article had come up on him, but it told a lot. When he was ten years old, he’d been kept in a cage like some animal in the basement of his parents’ house, and starved until he was only sixty pounds.
Imagining what he’d been through turned Cora’s stomach. What kind of people could do that to one of their own children? And where were those people now? Did he know?
Considering what he’d been through, it was no wonder the man was so guarded, so aloof—and so devoted to Aiyana and New Horizons.
“I can’t believe you’ll be staying right there on the property,” Lilly said.
“The school is about ten miles outside of town, so it’ll save me from the daily drive.”
“What drive? Ten miles is nothing,” Lilly scoffed. “The people in Silver Springs must have no idea how long it takes to go two blocks in LA when the traffic is bad.”
“Or they do know, and that’s why they live there.” Cora held up her blender. She made a lot of smoothies and “green” drinks, but her machine was nearly worn-out. Was it worth taking with her—or was it time to get a new one?
Newspaper crinkled as Lilly continued to wrap. “Traffic or no, I could never leave the city.”
Brad’s office was only a few blocks from their house. He’d been so successful managing other people’s money that he could set his own hours. And Lilly did charity work, mostly on nights and weekends. “You two are in the kind of situation that makes it easy to stay. Traffic isn’t a huge part of the equation for you.”
“Our lives haven’t always been so perfect,” she said.
Reluctantly, Cora put her blender in the pile for Goodwill. “No. You’ve worked hard for what you have,” she agreed and meant it.
Her mother stopped packing long enough to squeeze her shoulder. “You’ll build something, too, honey.”
“I hope so.” Right now it felt as if Ashton, her brother, was going to be the one to make them proud. Although Lilly and Brad hadn’t been too pleased when he left law school to become a movie producer, he already had an indie film out that’d garnered several awards, so they were less critical of his decision than they once were. “From this vantage point, it looks like I have a long way to go.”
“It all comes with time.”
Cora checked the clock on the wall. Jill, an assistant to a film editor at Universal, would be getting off work any minute. Cora had been hoping to be done by then, so they could meet some other friends for drinks, but there was a lot yet to pack. “Is Ashton going to be able to make it to my goodbye dinner on Sunday?”
“I’m sure he will. Your brother adores you.”
“Slightly less than he adores all of the women he’s dating,” she grumbled.
“That’s not true!”
It wasn’t entirely true, but Cora had been feeling a little neglected by her brother since he’d turned into such a big shot and become so busy.
The packing tape screeched as her mother closed and sealed the box she’d filled. “Does Aiyana Turner offer discounted housing to all the teachers at the ranch?”
The scent of the marker Lilly used to label the box “Kitchen—Fragile” rose to Cora’s nostrils. “She can’t. There’s not enough for everyone—just a handful of small cottages on the far side of the property, away from the school and the boys’ dorms.”
“So who looks after the boys at night?”
“Each floor has a live-in monitor they call a ‘big brother’ who makes sure the boys go to bed at lights-out, get up for school, study during study time and clean their rooms.”
“Are they teachers, too?”
“No. Most work in town during the day. I was told that some even drive to Santa Barbara. It’s merely a way to acquire free lodging, kind of like managing an apartment building.”
“How does—what’s her name, Aiyana Turner?—decide who gets the other housing?”
“Every teacher has the option to add their name to the waiting list and move in if one becomes available. I just happened to hire on at the right time. The teacher who quit left earlier than planned, and my unit wasn’t spoken for—probably because it’s so small. It wouldn’t be big enough for anyone with kids.”
“So where do the other teachers live? In town?”
“I’m assuming they do. Although I suppose some might live in Santa Barbara. It’s only about twenty minutes away, not a long commute by our standards.”
The packing tape screamed again as her mother built a new box. “But will there be enough of a social life for you in Silver Springs? I mean...if you’re living on campus, will you ever get out? How will you meet people?”
“I’ll meet the other teachers.”
“Who will most likely be older or married.”
“I really won’t know until I get there.”
Lilly straightened and rested her hands on her hips. “There’s more to life than work, honey. A year might not sound long right now, but, trust me, it’ll seem long if you have no one to do anything with that whole time.”
“I can always drive home, visit you guys, Jill, my other friends.”
“I hope you come home often. But...what about the man who hired you? Maybe you can get something going with him. Jill told me you said he was hot.”
Thank you, Jill. “He is hot, but...”
“What does he look like?”
Cora pictured the dark-headed, rather intimidating man who’d shown her around the ranch. He didn’t say too much, certainly didn’t waste words. But those blue eyes were laser-sharp. They didn’t miss a thing. Truth be told, he made her uncomfortable. “Sort of like...a pirate.”
Her mother opened another cupboard and started packing the plates. “A pirate? That’s a positive association?”
“In this case it is.” Mostly... When it came to his physical appearance, anyway.
“How tall is he?”
Cora put her salsa maker, which she’d barely used, in one of the boxes she planned to take with her. If she was going to live in the country, she was going to attend a farmer’s market occasionally and make homemade salsa. “Really tall. And built.”
“He sounds perfect.”
“Not perfect exactly.” That was what she found most compelling about him—that he was a little rough around the edges. “He’s got a fairly big scar on his face.” She indicated the line of her jaw. “Right here.”
“What’s that from?”
“I didn’t ask.” And now that she’d read the article chronicling some of the abuse he’d suffered, she wouldn’t. “As far as I know, he’s already married.”
“Did you see a ring?”
“I didn’t look,” she said, but that was a lie. She had looked—and seen no ring. She’d been curious about Elijah from the first moment they met. But she’d also been apprehensive about the fact that she’d had an ulterior motive for applying at New Horizons, had known he probably wouldn’t appreciate that she wasn’t being fully transparent.
Her mother grinned at her. “You should have.”
“Matt and I barely broke up, Mom. I’m not ready to start dating again, especially in a place where I don’t plan to stay.” Besides, she wasn’t sure she’d be capable of taking on a man as complex as Elijah. There was no telling what kind of scars his upbringing had created, and she wasn’t referring to the one on his face, although that could easily be part of the legacy his parents had left him.
“So you’re only staying there a year?” her mother said.
“That’s right.”
“I can’t tell you how happy I am to hear it’s temporary.” Lilly bent to give her a hug. “I love you, you know.”
Cora did know. And she was grateful. She could easily have gone to a family who weren’t so kind and accepting—a family like Elijah had known. “I love you, too,” she said and tried to ignore how selfish she felt for doing what she was doing in spite of the fact it would hurt Lilly if—or when—she found out.
* * *
Elijah Turner was brushing down his horse when Aiyana found him. At the sound of her footsteps, he didn’t need to turn in order to see who it was. If he didn’t come for dinner when she invited him, she tracked him down. She always acted as if she had some official reason, some business question to ask him, but he knew she was simply assuring herself that he was okay. Whenever he complained that he was too old for that kind of coddling, she’d say it didn’t matter, that he’d always be her boy.
“How was your ride?” she asked.
He lifted Atsila’s foot and used a pick to gently clean his horse’s front left hoof. “Relaxing.”
“Cora Kelly arrives tomorrow.”
“I know.”
“Is the cottage ready?”
He moved on to the other front hoof. “Of course.”
“Are you ever going to explain that decision to me?”
“What decision?” he said, but he knew what she was going to say before she explained.
“To hire Cora Kelly. You knew, as well as I did, that Gary Seton, from right here in Silver Springs, was waiting for that job to open up.”
“I interviewed Gary, too—gave him a chance.”
“And...”
“I thought Ms. Kelly was better suited for the position.”
“She’s pretty.”
“That had nothing to do with it.”
“Let’s say that’s true—you’re not worried that she might be a distraction to the boys?”
“You’re saying I should’ve discriminated against her because she’s attractive?”
She gave his shoulder a little shove. “Stop it.”
“You were talking about her looks!”
“Because I wanted to see if you agreed with me.”
“That she’s pretty? I’d have to be blind not to see that.”
“So...do I surmise a bit of interest on your part?”
“None. I’m not the marrying type. You should know that by now.”
“I’d like grandkids at some point.”
“You have plenty of other sons to give you grandkids.”
She sighed as if he was being purposely stubborn. “Fine. Obviously, you don’t like talking about this subject.”
He didn’t argue. There were moments he wondered if he truly wanted to be alone for the rest of his life. But he also saw nothing to be gained from allowing his happiness to hang on the love or will of another person.
“You missed dinner tonight,” his mother said.
“You said to come by if I was hungry.”
“You should’ve been hungry. It’s nearly eight.”
“We’ve talked about this before,” he responded. “I’m too old for you to worry about.”
“You’ll never be too old for me to worry about. And you know why? It’s called caring.”
His problem was that he had the tendency to care too much, to be too intense. “I’m fine.” He started on Atsila’s fourth and final hoof. “I’ll grab a bite while I’m in town tonight.”
She leaned against the fence post. “Whoa, don’t tell me you’re leaving the ranch for a social outing. You don’t do that very often.”
He gave her a look that let her know he didn’t appreciate the sarcasm.
Unperturbed, she smiled. “Your dark looks don’t frighten me the way they do everyone else.”
“They should.”
“Why? I know you love me, even if you rarely say it.”
“What good are words?” His parents used to claim they loved him, but they only loved themselves and the twisted joy they received from tormenting him. “Words are empty, meaningless.”
“Hopefully, someday, you’ll regain your trust.”
He winked at her. “Don’t hold your breath. But... I am very grateful for everything you’ve done for me. I hope you know that.”
“Stop!” She started to walk away.
“What?” he called after her.
“That wasn’t a leading statement. I’m not looking for your gratitude.”
She wasn’t comfortable with it, either. “You want me to fall in love.”
“I want you to be able to fall in love. I want to see you lose your heart—and not be afraid to let it go. Then I can rest easy, knowing you’re completely fulfilled.”
“You never married,” he pointed out, but she offered the usual lame excuse.
“Because I’m married to this place.”
Knowing that was all he’d ever get out of her on the subject, he studied her retreating figure. “Yeah, well, so am I.”
Chapter Three (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
Cora was using her Bluetooth to talk to Jill when she passed through the wrought iron arch at the opening of the school, her car packed full of her belongings. “I’m here,” she announced as she wound slowly around to where she’d be living.
“That didn’t take long. What time did you leave again?”
She’d gone in to hug her friend goodbye, but Jill, dead asleep, had mumbled something about missing Cora, promised to call and dropped back onto the pillows. “Six.”
“That’s not even two hours ago.”
“See? I’m not that far away.” Although...it almost seemed as if she’d moved to another planet; Silver Springs was nothing like LA.
“I should’ve come with you,” Jill said.
“How?” Cora asked. “You have to be to work in an hour.”
“I could’ve called in sick. You need someone to be there to help you unpack.”
“No, I don’t. My mother would’ve been hurt if she found out I let you come, since I told her I preferred to organize everything on my own.” Cora had definitely not wanted Lilly on the ranch. She knew Lilly had never met Aiyana, that the whole adoption had been handled through an agency. According to the documents her private investigator had uncovered, Aiyana had demanded absolute secrecy. But that didn’t change Cora’s need to keep the two women apart. “I can handle this. The cottage is furnished. And everything I’m bringing fits into my car. It’s not as if I’m towing a trailer.”
“Still, I’m curious.”
“About...”
“The ranch, for one thing. What does it look like?”
“Your basic high school, but with horses and cattle—and some dorms and a machine shop. You’ll see it when you come visit me.”
“I’ve been to Ojai but never Silver Springs. How does it compare?”
“The towns are similar, which makes sense. Silver Springs is located in the same valley, has some of the same mission-style architecture. Only they’ve added a few murals in Silver Springs, like they’ve done in Exeter.”
“Where’s Exeter?”
“Central part of the state.” Cora pulled into the drive that would be her drive for the next year and cut the engine. “My mom took me there once to show me the murals, thought I’d be interested because of my art degree.”
“I’m not that big on murals,” Jill said. “I’ve seen some pretty bad ones.”
“I’ve seen a lot that are worse than the ones they have here. The man who painted the one downtown interviewed for my job. I’m still surprised they didn’t hire him instead.”
“They told you who you were up against?”
“Aiyana and Elijah didn’t. When Aiyana showed me the house, she got a call on her cell, leaving me to speak with a neighbor. He said Gary Seton was a friend of his and was really disappointed.”
“Why didn’t they hire him?” Jill asked.
Cora gazed at her bungalow, trying to imagine calling this place home for the next twelve months. “I’m not sure. I would’ve guessed they’d prefer a local.”
“Could it be that Elijah wanted you to come to town?”
“No. I didn’t get those vibes at all.”
“So you think he’s married?”
“Not married.” There was too much sexual energy surrounding him for him to be in a committed relationship. She could tell he found her attractive—couldn’t help finding him attractive, too. A woman would have to be dead not to feel a little sizzle when a man like Elijah Turner came around. “Just completely closed off.”
“I’ve seen you approach guys before. You’ve never been afraid of a challenge.”
In this situation, she was. She had a lot to cope with already, didn’t need to add a romantic relationship into the mix. Even if she could manage to gain Elijah’s attention, she doubted she’d be able to keep it for long. He was too remote. “I’m only here for a year.”
“That could prove to be a very long year if you plan to remain celibate the whole time,” she joked.
“I’ll survive.” Although...she was already missing certain aspects of her relationship with Matt and, if she was being honest, sex was one of them. “It’d be kind of odd to hit up the man my mother adopted.”
“Why? You’re not related by blood. You didn’t even grow up together. For all intents and purposes, you’re part of a different family. You’re a Kelly.”
Cora dug through her purse, searching for the house key Aiyana had provided her. “On paper.”
“More than on paper! You’ve spent your whole life with the Kellys.”
“I was talking from a strictly literal perspective. But that reaction right there is part of my problem.”
“What do you mean?”
“Am I being ungrateful simply by wanting to know my birth mother? That tears me up inside, because I am grateful. I love my parents dearly.”
“It’s the same with regular parents. All kids should be grateful and aware of their parents’ sacrifice.”
“No, it’s not the same. There’s a sense of entitlement with children who’ve been kept and raised by their biological parents that doesn’t extend to me. Anyway, let’s not get caught up in all of that. Bottom line, people would look askance at Elijah and me if we ever admitted to having the same mother.”
“You wouldn’t admit that, because you don’t have the same mother.”
Cora groaned to show her frustration. “It’s murky. You have to give me that. Regardless, Elijah makes me jealous.” So did the other boys Aiyana had accepted into her life. That Aiyana would give Cora away and then take in eight other children left Cora feeling hurt, baffled. “He holds such a prominent place in Aiyana’s heart that it makes me wonder why she wanted him and not me.”
“We’ve talked about this.”
She climbed out of the vehicle and circled around to grab the suitcase that held her essentials. “You believe she feels the need to fix things—fix people.”
“You told me he had a rough childhood. The other boys probably did, too.”
Other than her ex-boyfriend, Jill was the only person she’d confided in about her search for her biological mother, her true purpose in coming to Silver Springs, and the background of the man who’d hired her. “No doubt. Elijah’s defies imagination. Which only makes me feel worse. When I think of what he’s been through, I can’t even be jealous without an avalanche of guilt. Considering the emotions he dredges up, I doubt he and I should even be friends.”
Jill ignored her uncomfortable laugh. “There were a number of years between the time Aiyana gave you up and adopted him. Her situation must’ve changed, that’s all.”
Since both hands were full, Cora used her hip to close the car door. “Maybe that’s it.”
“You can’t always assume the worst.”
“It’s hard not to. Especially now that I see how functional she is. I mean...if she were a down-on-her-luck prostitute, I could point to that and say, Makes sense.”
“The fact that she isn’t a down-on-her-luck prostitute is why you’re interested in getting to know her. There’s promise there. You believe she might be someone you’d like to have in your life. That’s what scares you. You’re afraid she’ll reject you a second time.”
Cora had to set her suitcase down to let herself into the house. “Do you have to be so frank?”
“It’s important to know when fear’s doing the talking—to keep things straight in your head.”
“It could be a while before anything’s straight in my head—another reason I’d be crazy to get involved with Elijah, even if he were open to a relationship, which I can tell he’s not.”
“Fine. You won’t listen to me, anyway. You’re too busy throwing up roadblocks.”
Cora wasn’t sure she felt any better now that Jill had conceded. She sort of liked it when Jill was arguing the other side. Maybe that was because she did find it hard not to think about Elijah. Even though she’d been almost completely focused on the fact that she’d just found her birth mother when she had that interview with him, she couldn’t help wondering what was going on behind those inscrutable eyes... “You were never given up for adoption. You grew up in a big, boisterous, happy family. You can’t relate.”
“I’ve tried to be understanding,” Jill said.
“I’m sorry,” Cora responded. “I don’t know where that came from. It was uncalled for.”
“You’re angry. That’s where it comes from. And I can see why. But I’m on your side.”
Cora opened her mouth to say she believed that, but before she could formulate the words, she heard a car engine and turned. What she saw wasn’t a car; it was a silver truck. And Elijah was behind the wheel. As he parked in front of her house and jumped out, she felt her pulse leap. “I’ve got to go,” she told Jill.
“Why? What’s up?”
She ducked her head so she could speak without being overheard. “He’s here,” she whispered and clicked the button on her Bluetooth that would disconnect them.
* * *
Cora was wearing a silky orange tank with a pair of white linen shorts that showed off her long, tan legs. As Elijah approached with the orientation materials he’d brought, he found those legs to be distracting. But she was a teacher at New Horizons. That meant he couldn’t get involved with her, even on a casual basis. Contrary to what his mother seemed to believe—and probably everyone else who was surprised he hadn’t hired Gary—he hadn’t offered her the position because he had any romantic interest in her. He’d been impressed with her portfolio. Each piece—a sculpture, a painting, a photograph and a piece of pottery—moved him in some way. He liked that she could make him, someone who knew very little about art, feel something. Gary Seton’s work simply hadn’t been the same.
One piece that Cora had brought, the conceptual sculpture of a mother cradling a child, affected him deeply. When she’d unveiled it during their interview, it’d been hard for him not to stop and stare. He’d wanted to keep it—not because he felt he needed that kind of love. No one would ever be able to hurt him again. He wanted the boys here at the ranch to experience the safety and security that piece inspired, and he wanted to give them a teacher who could not only depict that emotion but understand it, feel it.
Because he knew Gary was disappointed, he hoped he’d made the right choice. Fortunately, the sensitivity he saw in the large brown eyes staring up at him as he drew closer reassured him. She’d wanted the job even worse than Gary. He wasn’t sure why—if she’d needed to get out of whatever situation she was in or was on her last dollar—but he’d been able to feel her eagerness during their interview and he’d responded to that. Maybe this woman would never be able to teach the boys how to create a decent picture or vase, but she should be able to entice them to see the beauty of the world. She was part of the beauty of the world. And she seemed open and vulnerable to the point that he almost felt he should warn her to be careful or life would chew her up and spit her out. After what he’d experienced, that she could get so far without learning that lesson was a bit of a shock to him.
“Hello,” she said.
“I see you made it safely.”
“Yes.”
He motioned toward the older BMW X3 sitting in the drive. “Can I give you a hand with anything?”
“No, it’s okay. I was careful when I packed—didn’t make the boxes too heavy. I can grab it.”
“Are you sure?”
She nodded, so he handed her the orientation manual he’d brought over. “I doubt you’ll care to read all of this. Watching paint dry would be more interesting. But there’s a table of contents. I figured you could glance through, check out any topics you’re curious about and become familiar with how we do things around here.”
“I’ll take a look at it.” When she hugged it to her ample chest, he decided her body was partly what he found so attractive about her. She wasn’t as skinny as some of the girls he’d dated. She was curvy—looked soft, comfortable, sexy.
He searched his pocket for the more important part of what he’d come to give her. “Here’s a key to the high school, as well as one to the art and ceramics rooms. With school starting next week, you’ll be eager to set those up.”
“Definitely. Thank you.”
“You bet. You received the group email about the staff meeting tonight?”
“I did. That’s why I came a few days earlier than I would have otherwise.”
“Great. I’ll see you there.” He started back toward his truck. “Everyone is eager to meet you.”
“Mr. Turner?”
“Call me Eli,” he said as he turned.
“Okay, Eli it is. Where, exactly, is the meeting tonight? You showed me the library when we toured campus the day I interviewed, but I’m a little turned around at the moment.”
He went back and flipped past the syllabus he’d given her to the campus map on the next page. “You’re here,” he said, and drew a line from her house to the library so she could easily find her way.
“Thank you.”
“Sure,” he said. But instead of leaving, he went over to her SUV and began unloading the boxes. He just couldn’t leave a woman to do that alone, not when it would be so much easier for him.
“Whoa, I can get those,” she said, hurrying out to him. “Really.”
“There’s no need for you to carry all of this stuff by yourself. Just point to where it should go. It’ll only take me fifteen minutes.”
As promised, in a short time, he had her vehicle completely unloaded.
“Thank you,” she said as he put down the last box.
“See you later.” His conscience appeased, he started toward his truck.
“Eli?”
He stopped again. “Yes?”
“I—I have a boyfriend. Sort of.”
He felt his eyebrows slide up. Then he almost laughed. She was assuming he had an ulterior motive for helping her. “I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression,” he said. “I was only trying to make your move a little easier.”
Her cheeks bloomed red. “Right. Of course you were. I’m sorry.”
* * *
Cora’s face burned as she watched Eli drive off. “What’s wrong with you?” she muttered to herself. “Of course he was just trying to help. It’s not as if he asked for your number.”
That blunder actually said more about her than it did him, she realized. He hadn’t been anything but circumspect. She was the one who’d had a difficult time keeping her eyes off him. She was so aware of him on a sexual level that it was hard to act as if she wasn’t, which was odd. She couldn’t remember having such a strong reaction to any other man. That was the reason she’d suddenly tried to throw up a barrier. She’d been hoping to give him a reason to look at her differently—or stay away entirely—and wound up making a fool of herself instead.
“I told you I didn’t need your help,” she grumbled to him even though he was gone, and cringed at the prospect of having to face him at the staff meeting in a few hours.
“You had to do that on your first day here, Cora?” she said as she started to unpack.
Her phone dinged to let her know she’d received a text, and she paused to pull it out of her pocket.
Jill. What’d “dark and brooding” have to say?
Dark and brooding. How apropos. But since she was still writhing with embarrassment, Cora didn’t want to talk about Eli, so she scowled at the clock. Aren’t you at work?
You know I am. I was talking to you while driving here.
I don’t want to get you in trouble for being on the phone. I’ll call you later.
Is that a dodge?
Yes. But as long as her friend was willing to risk getting caught on a personal call at work, Cora figured she might as well break the news. He said he’s not interested in me.
What? Seriously?
Seriously.
But...you just got there.
Cora shoved a hand through her hair as she recalled his startled expression. Yeah, it came up quick. Thanks to her...
How? He couldn’t have come by just to let you know he’s not interested.
Again Cora hesitated, but when she didn’t respond her friend sent her a question mark, so she typed, I brought it up.
At that point, texting fell by the wayside. Jill called to make her explain the whole thing.
“Oh jeez,” she said when Cora was done. “I should never have let you go there without me. I could tell you were rattled, nervous.”
“I’ll get my feet underneath me. I’m just...not myself at the moment. The prospect of rubbing elbows with my birth mother has me...floundering a bit. I was expecting that to be difficult, but when I started this whole thing, I was not expecting my mother to have adopted a son who...”
“Who...” Jill pressed.
She pictured the muscles that bulged in Eli’s arms as he hefted box after box into her cottage. She really wanted to touch the smooth curve of his biceps. But it was the size of his broad chest and wide shoulders that really made her short of breath. “Who somehow gets under my skin!”
“To whom you feel an immediate attraction, you mean.”
“He’s good-looking. That’s all,” she said, hoping to minimize it.
“That’s why you told him, out of the blue, that you have a boyfriend as if you were accusing him of hitting on you? Because he’s good-looking? What were you thinking?”
“I don’t know! I was merely attempting to wall off the possibility. So I wouldn’t even consider it. That’s not too weird, is it?”
“You might’ve gotten ahead of yourself, but... I’m guessing you succeeded. I doubt he’s hoping for anything now, so you can relax.”
Cora took a deep breath. Jill was right. Maybe she hadn’t done it gracefully, but she’d put Elijah Turner on notice that she wasn’t a romantic possibility. Even if he hadn’t considered her one to begin with, establishing certain boundaries was important to her. She needed to focus, to keep her life simple while she was here so that she could do a good job for the kids at the ranch while getting to know Aiyana. If she decided she wanted to be part of Aiyana’s life, she’d eventually have to determine if Aiyana wanted to be part of hers—and break the news. Imagine how awkward it would be if the answer to that question was no and yet she was seeing Eli!
“It’s better that we covered it early.”
“If you say so. How’s the cottage?”
“Small but cute.” She wandered over to a Mason jar filled with wildflowers that someone had left on her table. It was a thoughtful touch, one she hoped Eli wasn’t responsible for...
“I can’t wait to see it.” Jill suddenly lowered her voice. “I’ve got to go. My boss is here.”
Cora wasn’t even sure she said goodbye when they disconnected. Her attention had switched entirely to a small card she found beside the flowers.
Welcome to New Horizons. We are so excited to have you here.
Aiyana
Bending slightly, Cora put her nose to one of the delicate yellow poppies that made up the bulk of the arrangement. “I hope you’ll be just as glad once you learn who I am,” she said as she exhaled.
Chapter Four (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
“So you’re the new art teacher.”
Cora smiled at the middle-aged man with thick glasses who sat on her right side. “Yes.”
“Ah. Makes sense at last.”
“What makes sense?” she asked, but he didn’t get the chance to answer—or even introduce himself. Aiyana stood near the circulation desk and called the staff to order. Cora felt she knew where the man had been going with that comment, anyway. Everyone thought she’d gotten the job based on her looks. Otherwise, Gary Something-or-Other would’ve gotten it.
“Thank you all for coming,” Aiyana said. “Although we had a few of you here during the summer, handling one program or another, classes were limited. So I hope, now that the rest of you are back, you feel refreshed, because I’m anticipating one of the best years in ranch history.”
As Aiyana spoke, Cora glanced around. There were thirtysomething people in the room, an assortment of teachers and support staff, but she couldn’t see anyone even close to her own age. Half the people seemed to be in their forties, the other half in their fifties. A few looked even older.
She was beginning to believe Jill and her mother were right: the next year was going to be terribly lonely...
“Before we get started, let’s go over a few of the changes that have occurred in the past two and a half months. First, we will have 256 students when we start classes on the twenty-eighth, up from 223 last year. That’s a significant increase, so we’ll have to watch out for the newcomers and help them feel at home. We also have a new football coach—Larry Sanders, who played in the pros thirteen years ago. Larry couldn’t be here tonight due to a family commitment, but he’s been practicing with the boys for over a month. I believe he’ll be a real asset to our sports program—at least that’s what Elijah tells me. As most of you know, Elijah is our athletic director in addition to many other things—basically whatever he needs to be in order for the ranch to operate smoothly.”
Cora’s neighbor leaned over. “Someone with real experience, huh? Maybe we’ll finally win a game,” he muttered.
Cora didn’t respond; she was too interested in witnessing the pride on Aiyana’s face when she looked at her adopted son. They were close. That was obvious without either one of them having to say a word—but as nice as that was for Elijah, Cora found it a bit disheartening. Was there any room in Aiyana’s heart for her?
Cora didn’t get the impression there was, but she didn’t have the chance to think about it for too long. Aiyana was moving on.
“Not only do we have a new football coach, we have a new art instructor.” She stretched out her hand in invitation. “Cora, will you please stand?”
Elijah’s eyes seemed to cut right through Cora as she got to her feet. Why she could feel the weight of his gaze and not anyone else’s, she couldn’t say, but she’d been struggling to ignore him since she walked into this meeting.
After a nod to acknowledge all the smiling faces that were turned to see the new art instructor, she sank back into her seat.
Aiyana was talking about how they were going to allow student government to run the assemblies from now on when the man next to her leaned over again. “Where have you taught before?” he asked.
After his earlier comment, Cora almost provided the name of the high school that had offered her a permanent position a few weeks ago, but a quick word with Aiyana or Elijah would too easily reveal the truth, since she’d been honest with them. “I’ve never had a permanent position.”
“You’re a brand-new teacher?”
“Relatively new,” she admitted. “I’ve been subbing for six years.”
“Do you have any idea how difficult some of the boys who come here can be?”
Aiyana hadn’t given the bad behavior Cora was likely to encounter much emphasis. But Cora had known from the beginning that this school wasn’t for the well-adjusted. “I understand that most of the boys come from a very difficult background,” she replied. “But it shouldn’t be too much of a change. You should see how some regular students treat substitutes,” she joked.
The man laughed but quickly sobered. “Subbing isn’t easy. Kids will get away with whatever they can. Still, for an attractive young woman of your age—”
“I’m nearly thirty,” she broke in, but she had to wonder—in her hurry to get close to Aiyana, had she given what she might face here enough weight?
“Still,” the man said. “It won’t be easy. I hope you haven’t gotten in over your head.”
When Cora glanced up, she happened to catch Elijah watching her. He didn’t look away, as she expected him to; he continued to measure her with those enigmatic eyes. Was he experiencing any doubts about having hired her?
Possibly. Probably. She hated to even consider that. But if she had to fight to find her place in the world, she’d do it. She supposed, in that respect, she wasn’t much different from Elijah or the other boys who’d come through here, or were still attending.
“I’ll be fine,” she said—and hoped it was true.
* * *
“I see you met Sean Travers.”
Cora recognized Elijah’s voice even before she turned to see him standing at her elbow. Why he’d put her through the discomfort approaching her was bound to cause, however, she couldn’t say.
“The guy who was sitting next to me?” she asked.
“Yes. Our science teacher—or ranch pessimist, depending on how well you know him.”
She nibbled at the cookie she’d just snagged from the refreshment table. “He doesn’t think I’m capable of teaching here. I guess I look too young and delicate to handle the boys who act out.”
“Does that shake your confidence?”
“I admit I’m a little worried. Everyone seems to believe the job should’ve gone to a man named Gary...”
“Seton,” he filled in as he handed her a cup of punch. “Because he’s local—they know him.”
“But...”
“It wasn’t their decision,” he said simply.
She couldn’t help envying him his long, dark eyelashes. She knew she had pretty eyes—guys told her that all the time—but she felt his were prettier. “No. It was yours. So...can you tell me why?”
“Why I chose you?”
“I know it isn’t what they all seem to think. You made that clear earlier.”
He took a sip of his own punch. “As far as I’m concerned, your competition has no...vision.”
“Am I supposed to understand what that means?”
His massive shoulders lifted in a shrug. “I wasn’t impressed with his work.”
“You were impressed with mine?”
“You’re talented,” he said evenly. “Perhaps more than you know.”
“I’m teaching art, not selling it. I’m guessing he was at least proficient.”
Elijah finally shifted that unnerving gaze away from her. “You have to understand certain concepts to be able to teach them.”
“What concepts are you specifically referring to?” she asked, but someone else approached him at that moment, interrupting, and he turned away without answering.
Since Eli fell deep into conversation with a woman who looked sixty or so and was concerned about a particular student Cora had no way of knowing, she felt awkward standing there waiting for the chance to speak to him again. So she gave them some privacy by carrying her punch over to the corner. She was looking for an unobtrusive vantage point from which to observe her birth mother. Aiyana was mingling with the staff. But then Cora saw the science teacher who’d sat next to her approach Aiyana and knew, when they both glanced in her direction, that they were talking about her. Sean Travers was expressing his reservations.
Disgruntled that this man she’d barely met would jump to conclusions based on her age and gender, and start to advocate against her, Cora finished her punch, dropped the paper cup in the wastebasket and left the library. Her phone kept vibrating in her pocket anyway, making her feel as if someone really needed to reach her.
When she got outside and felt she could check, caller ID indicated it was her father.
Gazing up at more stars than she’d ever seen in the sky before, she wandered around the campus as she spoke to him. Most of the students were away, at home if they had a home to go to, for a quick holiday before classes started in earnest, so the campus was quiet, especially this far from the outdoor basketball courts and the dorms.
“So are you going to like it there?” her father asked.
She tried to let the energy in his voice help lift the depression that had set in. “It’s definitely going to be a change.”
“A positive one, though, right?”
“Sure,” she said, kicking a small pebble across the sidewalk.
“Whoa. Is something wrong?”
“It’s just different, that’s all. I’m not used to smelling manure at night. Or seeing stars that shine so bright.”
“The manure can’t be pleasant, but the stars sound nice.”
“They are nice. And the manure isn’t all that bad, not if I stay away from the livestock pens. I guess it’s more that... I’m beginning to wonder what made me think I could handle teenage boys who have significant behavioral issues.” She’d mostly been thinking of her own emotional issues, not the responsibility she would feel to be a guiding light to teenage boys who’d lost their way. Was she bound to disappoint Aiyana and Elijah and let her students down?
She couldn’t abide the thought of failure.
“Don’t make it too complicated, babe,” her father said.
“In what way?”
“Everyone responds to love.”
“I have to do more than love them, Dad. I have to teach them. And what if they won’t let me?”
“If you love them, they’ll trust you. Love and trust come first. Then you’ll be able to teach. I promise you.”
She thought of Gary Seton. Maybe he had no “vision,” whatever Elijah meant by that. But she was willing to bet he’d be firmer when it came to meting out discipline. She didn’t want to punish anyone. “I’m not sure why these people hired me,” she grumbled.
“They must’ve seen what your mother and I see in you.”
“And that is...”
“You can do anything.”
Tears filled her eyes. She was tired, which made her emotional. But she was also experiencing a little culture shock, and she missed her family already. “Maybe I was a bit hasty making the decision to come here, Dad.”
“It’s only for a year, honey. Do your best. That’s all anyone can ask. And come see us when you can.”
She wiped her cheeks as she told him she loved him. But she felt even worse after she disconnected. She had good parents. The conversation she’d just had with her father proved it yet again. So why was she betraying them?
* * *
The moment she got back to her cottage, Cora went straight to bed. She had a lot of unpacking yet to do, but she figured that could wait. She needed sleep, knew it would help her cope with all the recent changes—as well as the uncertainty.
Fortunately, she felt a lot better when she woke up. She spent the morning unpacking the rest of her belongings and stacking the cardboard from the boxes in her SUV so she could take it to a recycling center. Then she decided to go into town to look around, have lunch and buy a few groceries. Someone—she guessed Aiyana since Aiyana had also been responsible for the flowers—had put a few essentials, like eggs, bread and milk, in her fridge, but the cupboards needed to be stocked.
Cora was halfway to town when she saw a man on horseback galloping down a dirt road off to her right. She would’ve thought nothing of it—she could only see the rider from the back as he wove in and out of the trees between them—but she recognized the man. It was Elijah Turner!
She pulled over and angled her head to see through the passenger window, trying to get a better look. He was something else. A puzzle. What drove him? What did he want out of life? Had he put the past behind him? How did he feel about the boys who came to the ranch? Did he see himself in each one? Where were the people who’d abused him? Did he have any contact with them? Was his work enough to fulfill him? Or was he seeing someone?
Maybe he was dating around...
Cora was also curious to learn how he’d gotten that scar on his face—but equally afraid to find out. What she’d read about him scared her. She didn’t want to imagine him going through any more pain and suffering than what she’d been forced to imagine when she’d read that article about him. She wondered if other people had the same reaction—if they shied away from him for fear they might have to walk into that darkness.
Movement behind him caught her eye, and she realized that he wasn’t alone. He had three boys with him. It looked as though he was taking some New Horizons students out for a ride...
She glanced into her backseat. She had her camera, had brought it to take some pictures of Silver Springs she could send to Jill and her family. She still planned to do that, but her fingers itched to take a few shots of him and those boys first. She’d never seen a man sit so comfortably in the saddle as Elijah. And she loved the way he kept looking back at the boys, like a mother hen checking her chicks.
This wasn’t about admiring Aiyana’s adopted son so much as it was about the symbolism she saw here, she told herself as she cut the engine. He represented a man who’d not only survived tremendous difficulty but risen above it. Someone who’d conquered his demons. And now he was helping others battle theirs. There was a great deal of artistic beauty in that, and she had to capture it.
She couldn’t get a clear shot from the roadside, however. There were too many trees in between.
After hiking down the embankment, she wove through the forest to get close enough. Luckily for her, or she never would’ve caught up with them, Elijah and the boys had stopped and were laughing and talking while drinking from a canteen Eli passed around.
She fastened her heavy telephoto lens to the expensive camera her parents had given her for Christmas last year and clicked away, using a fast shutter speed so that the pictures wouldn’t turn out blurry. In one picture, she captured Elijah laughing. She’d never seen him smile, not so easily. He was in his element out here, and he cared about the boys he was with. Those two things were readily apparent; she could see it in both his body language and his expression.
Cora was disappointed when he put the lid on the canteen, slung it over his body, where he’d been carrying it before, and charged up the next hill, making it impossible for her to get any more pictures of him.
As the boys whooped and hollered in their efforts to keep up with him, she hiked back to her car. They were having a blast. She could easily imagine any problem they had disappearing while they were out enjoying the beautiful scenery and the equally beautiful weather.
Witnessing the impact Elijah was having on the students at the ranch—by taking enough interest to guide them on a ride even during their “off” period—inspired her. He was embracing the spirit of his job. Like Aiyana, he was doing it for the right reasons. And so could she. She had a lot of love to give. Who needed it more than abused, neglected and angry teens?
How are you doing today?
Her father’s text came in just before Cora started her car. Better, she wrote.
Because...
Because coming here was no longer only about her. I feel like I could make a real difference with this job.
That’s the spirit!
Cora responded by sending a smiley face, put her phone down and headed into town, where she took quite a few pictures. It was a great way to investigate her new surroundings. Those were the ones she posted on Instagram and sent to family and friends who were eager to see where she’d moved. But it was the photographs of Elijah and the three boys that she downloaded onto her computer when she returned that night. She spent over an hour experimenting with different filters and other bells and whistles on Photoshop. In her favorite photograph, one where Elijah was smiling at the boy to his left, the lighting was perfect as it came through the branches of the trees.
She could win a contest with that shot...
“Hail to the conquering hero,” she muttered before she set her computer aside and turned off the light so that she could get some sleep.
Chapter Five (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
Over the next few days, Cora put her classroom in order by making sure the large, commercial-sized kiln and sixteen throwing wheels in the pottery room were clean and in good repair. She also took stock of the clay and other supplies. The teacher before her had done a respectable job caring for the equipment and maintaining the necessary inventory, so it wasn’t too overwhelming of a job. She obtained permission to order some glazes she’d been hoping to get, as well as a new set of colored pencils and paintbrushes for each student, so she’d at least have the supplies needed to start the year off right.
By the end of the week, Cora was feeling pretty encouraged about beginning school on Monday. She’d been running into more and more students as the boys returned to the ranch and was looking forward to meeting the rest. Other than texting and calling her old friends and her brother, who promised to come out and see her soon, she’d had virtually no social life since she arrived, so she figured more distraction, work and activity would help fill that gap. The neighbor opposite to Sean Travers, Doug Maggleby, a math teacher at the school, chatted with her whenever he caught her out and about. But she’d started to avoid him, where possible. The more he talked, the more uncomfortable he made her. He liked to rave about politics, and she rarely agreed with his opinion. He’d also mentioned taking her to the movies even though he was clearly too old for her. She wasn’t looking forward to having to say no, but knew that was coming. So instead of visiting with him in the evenings like she had the first few nights, she’d sneak out of her bungalow and walk down to the pond to watch the sunset or stop by the horses’ pen to say good-night. If Mr. Maggleby happened to be in his yard working in his fall garden, however, she’d settle for having a glass of wine in her cottage and reading a book or going over her lesson plans.
She’d seen very little of Elijah since taking those photographs of him horseback riding with the boys. Although she wasn’t pleased by the fact, she’d developed a habit of looking for him whenever she was out. Occasionally, she’d spot him at a distance and couldn’t help admiring what she saw. But he seemed extra busy getting the ranch ready for the fall semester, so she was fairly certain she was the last thing on his mind.
Aiyana had been especially busy, too. Since Betty May had handled the purchase requisition for the art supplies, Cora had had no interaction with her birth mother—not until Friday afternoon. She was in the cafeteria between lunch and dinner, nibbling on a chocolate chip cookie while she finished reading the orientation materials she’d been given, when Aiyana came in, poured herself a cup of coffee and walked over to join Cora.
“Hello.” Instantly self-conscious, Cora closed the manual as her “boss” sat down.
“How are you holding up, dear?” Aiyana asked.
“Good.” She cleared her throat. “Great.”
“I’m relieved to hear it—and glad to find you here. This time of year is so crazy for me. I apologize that I haven’t had the chance to check on you. Did you get the supplies you requested?”
“Not yet. But last I heard they’ve been ordered, so they should arrive soon. Thanks for giving the okay on that.”
She took a drink of her coffee. “I told you how I feel about art. That isn’t where I choose to skimp.”
“I have to admit your attitude is refreshing. I’m not used to art being much of a priority.”
“The practicalities of running a school can often get in the way of even the best intentions,” she said. “Fortunately, right now, we’ve got some wealthy benefactors who are giving us the support we need.” She winked. “Makes a difference when we have a fair number of students with rich—and sometimes famous—parents.”
“Are we talking movie stars?” Cora hadn’t considered that possibility, but she supposed, since they weren’t far from LA, it was logical.
“A few. Others are the children of producers and movie execs, attorneys, doctors, that sort of thing.”
“Are the wealthy kids ones who are typically loved, or...”
Her lips curved into a rueful smile. “Oh, they’re loved, just a little more generously than would probably be best. From what I’ve seen, being given too much can be as difficult as being given too little.”
“Doesn’t that create quite a disparity? I mean...you mentioned taking in orphans who have no one to support them.”
“We have some of the richest and some of the poorest students in the state. But we make it clear from the beginning that everyone is on an equal footing here at the ranch. There is no favoritism, no bending of the rules because of who their parents are.”
“I can’t imagine that goes over very well—not for people who are used to receiving preferential treatment.”
“I’ve lost several students over that policy,” she admitted. “All parents agree to it when they enroll their child—but can change their minds once they want or need special treatment.” She pushed a strand of loose hair out of her face. “Regardless, I won’t bend. To me it’s a matter of integrity. And, if a parent will stand behind me, their son usually settles down and begins to learn the lessons they were hoping we’d teach him.”
Cora swallowed another bite of her cookie. “How does that play out in a social setting—for the kids, I mean?”
Aiyana took another sip of coffee. “Depends. We take a hard line on bullying, too—watch carefully for it. Most get the message early on that the rules are firmer here, but fair to all, and life falls into a sustainable rhythm. I don’t think we’re too terribly different from other high schools—all schools have some behavioral problems.”
“But you’ve taken on the behavioral problems other schools can no longer cope with. Doesn’t that ever make you feel...intimidated?”
“I wouldn’t want to go back and start over—I can tell you that,” she said with a mirthless chuckle. “But now that we’re up and running, and I’ve got the momentum that comes from doing this for so long, it’s easier than it was. Still, I couldn’t continue without the community support I’ve received, not to mention the devoted teachers we have here—and Elijah, who has such a knack for communicating with these boys. Even if I can’t get one to behave, he usually can.”
Cora pictured Aiyana’s son on top of that horse. “Elijah’s your secret weapon.”
“Absolutely.”
She studied Aiyana’s face. Her mother was so pretty despite the lines that were beginning to appear around her eyes and mouth and the ribbons of gray in her hair. “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but...”
“Ask me anything,” she said.
“I was wondering what nationality you are.”
She seemed surprised by the question—that Cora would have any interest in that—but not put off. “My mother is a Nicaraguan immigrant. My father was a white farmhand in the Central Valley.”
“Are they still alive?”
“They are. But my mother is no longer with my father. He was an abusive man, so I don’t have any contact with him, either. For many years now she’s been with the farmer who employed them both and has been so much happier. What about you? What nationality are you?”
Cora thought it might be too coincidental if she were to say she was part Nicaraguan, but that was good to know—filled in one of the many blanks in her life. Aiyana had said her father was white; from her skin tone, Cora assumed hers was, too. “I’m a mix, I think.”
“And your parents? Where are they?”
“In LA. My father’s a financial planner. My mother’s sort of a...socialite.”
She smiled at that. “Do you have siblings?”
“An older brother who’s larger than life and terribly handsome. Like a lot of people in LA, he’s a movie producer. What about you?”
“I have one older brother and two younger brothers, but I don’t see my younger brothers very often.”
She seemed noticeably saddened by that. “They don’t live close?”
“My brothers are all over California. One owns a winery in Napa. One is in banking in San Francisco. The oldest runs the farm for my mom and stepdad in Los Banos, where I grew up.”
“Are they all married?”
“Yes. With kids. What about your brother?”
Suppressing her curiosity about why Aiyana had never married, Cora answered the question. “Still playing the field.”
“Sounds like my sons.”
“Where are they all? I mean, besides Eli, of course.”
“Gavin, my second oldest, has a house in town but works here. He’s a handyman, can fix anything.”
“Really?” Cora had been around for five days, yet she couldn’t recall ever seeing a handyman. “Was he at the meeting on Monday?”
“No. He’s not someone who likes to get involved in the administration aspect of the ranch. He prefers to remain in the background, which is why he lives in town.”
“How old is he?”
“Twenty-eight. I adopted him three years after I adopted Elijah. Then there’s Dallas. He’s twenty-five and a mountain climber, so he’s usually off, traveling to remote destinations all over the world. I don’t get to see him much.” She seemed to regret that but moved on. “Seth is twenty-three. He recently graduated from UC Berkeley, wants to be a sculptor. That’s one of the reasons I love art so much,” she confided. “I’m not sure what I would’ve done with him if I hadn’t been able to reach him in that way...”
“He has...emotional issues?”
“Anger issues, mostly. I seem to gravitate to the most damaged of the boys. I can’t help trying to make them whole.”
Did Aiyana always accomplish that? Or were some of her sons too damaged? “Let’s see—Elijah, Gavin, Dallas and Seth. That’s four sons, but I heard you have eight,” Cora said. “What about the others?”
“Ryan and Taylor are twins. Well, they’re not actually related, but we call them twins because they’re the same age and have done just about everything together since they met here at the ranch. They’re still in college. Ryan wants to be a planetary scientist, and Taylor has set his sights on becoming a theoretical physicist. They’re both too brilliant for their own good,” she added. “Now that they’re actually applying themselves.”
“Where do they go to school?”
“MIT. Then I have Liam and Bentley, who go here. Liam’s a senior. Bentley’s a sophomore.”
“I wonder if I’ve seen either one of them around.”
“Not yet. They’ve been with Dallas at Yosemite the past ten days. He’s teaching them how to climb.”
“That’s nice of him.”
“They live to spend time with their older brothers.” She lowered her voice. “He better not let them get hurt, though.”
“It’s a scary sport.” Cora dusted the cookie crumbs off her “boyfriend” jeans. “Would you ever consider adopting more?”
Finished with her coffee, Aiyana pushed the cup aside. “I keep telling myself I need to stop. But every couple of years, it seems as if there’s at least one more I’m dying to take home with me.”
“That means...maybe?”
“I guess. It’ll depend on the circumstances.”
So she would take in another boy if she felt he needed her that much, Cora decided. “Did you always want a big family?” she asked and then held her breath. She thought this might be the most revealing question yet, that it might give her some clue as to why Aiyana hadn’t wanted her, but Aiyana’s face grew shuttered as she shook her head.
“No. Never thought I’d have any kids.”
Cora was dying to ask why, but there was something so forbidding in the sudden change in Aiyana’s expression and body language that she could tell it would be too intrusive. Aiyana had essentially slammed the door shut on that subject, and she didn’t stick around long enough to give Cora much of a chance to talk about anything else.
“I’d better go.” She reclaimed her empty cup as she stood. “It’s been wonderful having a chance to chat, but I’ve got a lot to do before the pizza party tonight. You’re coming, right?”
Cora had found a flyer taped to her door when she got back to her cottage last night announcing a Kickoff Party for all the teachers at a place called Moonstruck Pizza in town. “I haven’t made up my mind, to be honest.”
“Oh, don’t miss it,” she said. “The entire staff gets together the Friday before school starts to celebrate the end of summer and the beginning of a new year. It’s a tradition.”
“And the students? They stay on campus?”
“Yes. The floor monitors keep an eye on them. So come to the party. It’ll give everyone a chance to get to know you. And there’ll be plenty of pizza and beer—and karaoke, if you sing.”
“I sing a little,” Cora said, but that was an understatement. She sang a lot. She and a handful of friends liked to compete in various local contests, enjoyed standing behind a mic. And she really needed to get out and have some fun. She just hoped Doug Maggleby wouldn’t be too determined to monopolize her time. She could easily imagine spending the evening trying to dodge him.
“So you’ll be there?” Aiyana seemed eager for her company.
At that point, Cora didn’t feel as if she could refuse—not if it might afford her a few minutes more with her birth mother. “Sure. Why not?” she said, but as soon as she agreed, she began to wonder if Elijah would be part of the festivities. Then she chided herself for having the desire to see him. She was letting herself get quite a “thing” for Aiyana’s handsome son, even though she barely knew him and he’d made it clear he wasn’t interested in her.
* * *
He was there. Cora spotted Elijah as soon as she walked into the pizza parlor and hated herself for suddenly being so glad she’d come. She didn’t need to get her heart broken; she was trying to mend it by moving here, to finally get over the sense of rejection her adoption had engendered.
But she figured she shouldn’t be too hard on herself. She didn’t yet know anyone other than the staff she’d been introduced to at the school, so it wasn’t all that surprising she’d fixate on the one man she’d met who was in her age bracket—especially when she factored in how darned handsome he was.
She couldn’t get hurt if he never responded, anyway. His disinterest made the attraction safe. So she figured she might as well enjoy the view he provided, maybe even indulge in a few harmless fantasies. If allowing him to fuel her imagination helped pass the time and made her stint in Silver Springs more enjoyable, why not?
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Brenda Novak
New York Times bestselling author Brenda Novak welcomes readers to the town of Silver Springs, where surprises wait around every corner!The search for her birth mother brought Cora Kelly to the New Horizons Boys Ranch. Getting a job there was easy enough, but confiding in Aiyana, the ranch’s owner, that she's really her daughter? Cora's not sure she can do that, not unless she's confident the news will be welcomed. And once she gets to know Elijah Turner—Aiyana's adopted son and ranch manager—that decision becomes even more difficult.Although Elijah can’t deny his deep attraction to Cora, he's always struggled with trust. Anyone with his past would, and there's something about the ranch’s newest employee that isn't exactly as it seems. But if the feelings she awakes in his guarded heart are any indication, she might be just what he’s long been waiting for.
New York Times bestselling author Brenda Novak welcomes readers to the town of Silver Springs, where surprises wait around every corner!
The search for her birth mother brought Cora Kelly to the New Horizons Boys Ranch. Getting a job there was easy enough, but confiding in Aiyana, the ranch’s owner, that she’s really her daughter? Cora’s not sure she can do that, not unless she’s confident the news will be welcomed. And once she gets to know Elijah Turner—Aiyana’s adopted son and ranch manager—that decision becomes even more difficult.
Although Elijah can’t deny his deep attraction to Cora, he’s always struggled with trust. Anyone with his past would, and there’s something about the ranch’s newest employee that isn’t exactly as it seems. But if the feelings she awakes in his guarded heart are any indication, she might be just what he’s long been waiting for.
“So I’d only get hurt if I got involved with you,” Cora said.
“Yes. You’d essentially be getting a locked box.”
He was being transparent, completely up-front. She was the one who’d set that tone. So it surprised him when she barked out a laugh. “You think you’re doing me a favor by staying away!”
He was trying to adhere to the decisions he’d made after that last ugly blowout with Tina. He’d been glad for the peace and balance he’d found since they’d broken up a year ago. But twelve months was a long time to go without a woman... “Essentially.”
“Well, you’re taking a lot for granted, Mr. Turner. First of all, how do you know I’m going to want you to love me?”
“Experience,” he said wryly. “I have yet to encounter the opposite problem.”
* * *
Silver Springs: Where love changes everything!
Finding Our Forever
Brenda Novak
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
New York Times and USA TODAY bestselling author BRENDA NOVAK is the author of more than fifty books. A five-time RITA® Award nominee, she has won many awards, including the National Readers’ Choice Award, the Booksellers’ Best Award and the Silver Bullet Award. She also runs Brenda Novak for the Cure, a charity to raise money for diabetes research (her youngest son has this disease). To date, she’s raised $2.5 million. For more about Brenda, please visit www.brendanovak.com (http://www.brendanovak.com).
To all lost/hurt boys.
May you find an Aiyana Turner in your life.
Contents
Cover (#ua82f7d75-d60a-5981-b297-acd7004bd84b)
Back Cover Text (#u5e51a521-f4f5-52c7-9c14-8b19db262c60)
Introduction (#u9c2cb738-3e2a-5f96-b2ba-c22c2b427b34)
Title Page (#u9ea2d10f-b6c9-52e1-a666-50e24b96c619)
About the Author (#u6a7c4412-613a-595d-89c4-dbd0f2cfb070)
Dedication (#u4258acf0-8361-512f-be61-44968cbd7784)
Chapter One (#u870b2905-2075-5a1a-82b2-255d63ad4051)
Chapter Two (#u810effed-894b-5687-8024-fc16fd40b257)
Chapter Three (#ubd7c4d58-cbd8-5bdb-ae68-e8517001d531)
Chapter Four (#uf35d5803-5897-565f-9b34-fc14c14948d1)
Chapter Five (#ub09b72a9-7994-5817-9793-3cd70619436f)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fifteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Sixteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seventeen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eighteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nineteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twenty (#litres_trial_promo)
Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)
Extract (#litres_trial_promo)
Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter One (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
Cora Kelly had never met her birth mother.
The records had been sealed when she was adopted as a newborn twenty-eight years ago. Her adoptive mother didn’t even know her birth mother’s name, so it wasn’t as if Lilly Kelly had ever mentioned it. Cora had had very little to go on. Even with two different attorneys, a website designed to help families reconnect and a private investigator who’d taken her case for free since he was an adoptee himself and did what he could, in his spare time, to help others who’d been through the same thing, it’d taken six long years to glean the information she craved. But here she was, only moments away from coming face-to-face, for the first time since the day she was born, with the woman who’d brought her into this world.
Would she like her mother? Would they resemble each other more in person than in the one picture she’d seen? Would Aiyana Turner somehow recognize her for who she was?
Those questions churned in Cora’s mind, making her stomach churn, as well. But one question weighed heavier than the others: Was she making a mistake?
Wiping her palms on her slacks, she told herself to calm down. As far as Aiyana knew, they were only meeting to talk about Cora’s new job working as an art instructor at New Horizons Boys Ranch, a boarding school for troubled teens, ages fourteen to eighteen, ninety minutes outside LA. No way would Aiyana have any reason to suspect Cora’s true identity. And Cora didn’t plan to tell her who she was. Not today. Maybe not ever. That was why she’d sought this job—and accepted it. So she’d have the chance to see what she might be getting into before making that decision.
Hopefully, her mother would be someone she could admire, at least. From what she could tell, Aiyana had done a lot to help teenage boys who acted out, some who’d been orphaned as well as many who hadn’t. Her work as executive administrator of the school she’d founded twenty years ago seemed to be her one true love. She’d never been married, and she’d never had any more of her own children. According to a newspaper article honoring Aiyana on the anniversary of the date the boys ranch opened, something the private detective who finally solved the mystery of Aiyana’s identity had provided, Aiyana had adopted quite a few of the residents who’d come to the school through the years—eight of them, so far. The oldest, Elijah Turner, was now a man in his early thirties. He helped run New Horizons. Cora knew because he was the person who’d interviewed and then hired her. That was why she hadn’t yet met Aiyana. Aiyana had been out of town when Cora came two weeks ago.
“I’m sorry it’s taking a few moments. Ms. Turner is on an unexpected but important call.” The receptionist, a gray-haired woman who had to be in her sixties, smiled kindly as she imparted this apology. “I can’t imagine it’ll be much longer.”
Hauling in a deep breath, Cora smiled. “It’s fine. I don’t mind waiting.” She didn’t mind, except that she was beginning to fear she’d have a heart attack right there outside of Aiyana Turner’s office. Somehow, she had to stem her anxiety...
“Are you too warm, dear? I can turn down the air...”
She glanced up at the receptionist again—and realized she’d been fanning herself. “Um...no. I’m okay, thanks,” she said and dropped her hand.
“It’s been hot this summer.”
“Yes, it’s particularly warm today,” Cora said, but it was generally worse where she lived in Burbank. Along with Jill, her best friend, Cora rented a small condo just outside of Hollywood, where her adoptive parents still owned the lovely four-bedroom home where she’d been raised.
She felt a twinge of guilt when she thought of her parents, Brad and Lilly. They’d been good to her, treated her just like her brother, who was two years older and their biological child. They wouldn’t be pleased that she’d landed this job if they knew the driving force behind it.
Don’t think about that. What they don’t know can’t hurt them. It would be premature to drag them into this, anyway, since she had no idea where it might go. For all she knew, it wouldn’t go anywhere. And maybe that was for the best. Several years ago, when she’d first mentioned that she’d like to find her birth mother, Brad and Lilly had acted shocked and disappointed. They’d taken it personally, didn’t understand that they didn’t do anything to cause the emptiness inside her and weren’t the ones who could fix it. The hole was just there, and Cora felt it would be until she could figure out where she came from, who she was and where she belonged.
She hoped this would help. Her boyfriend—ex-boyfriend since she’d broken up with him last month—claimed it was her personal problems that’d destroyed their two-year relationship. He said she needed to let go of her past and move on, that she could be opening Pandora’s box.
He could be right. But it was too late to change her plans. She’d already made a yearlong commitment to New Horizons. Today’s meeting with Aiyana was merely a formality—an orientation, of sorts. Cora had given notice that she’d be vacating her condo at the end of the month, at which point her friend would get a new roommate and she’d move to Silver Springs, a town of only 5,000 people located slightly east of Santa Barbara.
After spending her whole life in the big city, Cora wasn’t sure she’d like living in such a rural area, but if she had to pick a small town, this one wasn’t bad. Known for its robust arts community, the renovation of its downtown, its clean water, green energy, recreation and quaint small businesses, there was a lot to recommend it. Life was just slower. Those who didn’t grow up here came to retire, raise a family in a “safe place” or enjoy the beauty of the surrounding mountains—
“Ms. Kelly?”
Cora’s heart jumped into her throat. The drone of the voice she’d heard coming from the inner office had fallen silent. This was it! The receptionist was about to tell her she could go in...
“Yes?”
“Ms. Turner will see you now.”
For a moment, Cora’s determination faltered. But when she didn’t move, the receptionist—Betty May, according to the placard on her desk—stood expectantly. “It’s right through here,” she said with a puzzled expression.
Swallowing to ease her dry throat, Cora nodded. “Right. I was just...” About to run the other way... Letting her words fall off, since she couldn’t readily lay her mind upon a good excuse, she threw back her shoulders and crossed the room to step inside an expansive office with several rows of pictures on the wall—every graduating class of New Horizons.
Those pictures melted into the background as soon as Cora’s eyes landed on the diminutive woman with long black hair that fell in a braid down her back. This was where she’d gotten the golden color of her skin, Cora thought as she stared. That detail hadn’t been quite so apparent in the grainy picture she’d seen with that newspaper article, but her mother appeared to be part Mexican, South American or maybe Native American.
Wasn’t that something she should’ve had a right to know without having to go to all the trouble and expense she did?
Cora had always been conscious of the difference in her skin tone compared to the Kellys. Lilly had blond hair and blue eyes and, like many of her friends, had indulged in a fair amount of Botox and cosmetic surgery. Aiyana, on the other hand, didn’t look as though she’d ever altered anything.
“Ms. Kelly, I’m so sorry for making you wait. That call was about another candidate for the school. Considering the mischief he’s been in, I figured I should handle it as soon as possible. His poor grandmother, who’s raising him, is beside herself.”
Cora blinked rapidly, battling a sudden upwelling of emotion. She’d longed for this day. And here it was. She was looking at her mother.
But she couldn’t act strange or she might give herself away. What had Aiyana just said? Something about the wait and the reason for it... “Of course,” she managed to respond, dragging what she’d heard out of short-term memory before it could disappear into the ether. “I understand that the welfare of the boys has to come first.”
Aiyana’s smile as she gestured toward the chair on the other side of her desk suggested she appreciated Cora’s response. “Please, take a seat.”
Cora could hardly pull her gaze away long enough to sit without missing the chair.
“Eli tells me—”
“Eli?” Cora echoed.
“Elijah,” she clarified. “My son.”
“Oh right.” Aiyana was talking about the incredibly handsome but imposing man who’d interviewed Cora two weeks ago. If only Cora could think clearly, she would’ve made that connection as instantly as she should have. He’d certainly left an impression.
“He told me you graduated from the University of San Diego with a BA in art education six years ago.”
“Yes. I love art, and I love teaching, so...putting the two together seemed like a natural for me.”
“You’ve been working as a substitute since then?”
“That’s right. When I first graduated, I was grateful for the flexibility subbing gave me, because I was doing a bit of traveling with my parents. Since then it’s been difficult to find a full-time position, given that so many schools are cutting back on their art, music and sports programs.”
“I understand. So that’s why you answered our ad?”
One of the reasons—though not the most important. Ironically enough, she’d been offered a full-time position for the coming year at the school for which she’d substituted most often, so she’d no longer needed the opportunity. The art teacher at Woodbridge High was retiring and had put in a good word for her. But, to her parents’ consternation, Cora had turned it down. Aiyana was here. That meant New Horizons offered something no other school could. “Yes.”
Aiyana peered at her more closely. “Is something wrong?”
Tears were getting the best of her despite all her efforts to suppress them. “Allergies,” Cora explained. “It’s that time of year. Fortunately, they don’t last long.”
“Would you like me to get you a tissue?”
Cora used her finger to remove the tear that was about to roll down her cheek. “No, I’m fine. My eyes are just...a little itchy, that’s all.”
“Let me know if you change your mind,” she said. “I’ll get you something if you need it. Meanwhile, I’d like to talk to you about the importance we place on art here at the ranch. Most other schools focus on core subjects, and as an accredited high school, we certainly make that a priority here, too. But it’s my feeling that our students cannot excel in those classes—in anything—if they’re too broken to care or try. I believe in healing those who will be healed by showing them the beauty of life and giving them a healthy form of expression. I guess it would be safe to say that, around here, you aren’t merely an extra, the first teacher to go when the budget gets tight. You are our most important teacher, which is why I asked to meet with you before you started in a couple of weeks.”
“I admire your philosophy.” Cora agreed with it, too. But hearing that she was the most important teacher at the ranch was intimidating, since this was her first full-time position.
“I want my boys to be educated,” Aiyana continued, “but even more than that, I want them to be whole, to find peace.”
“Makes sense to me.”
“Good. I should warn you that most have never been introduced to drawing, painting or pottery. They think school has to be boring and hard, which is what makes it so rewarding to introduce them to the fun side of learning. Creative endeavors are one of the best tools we have to ease the pain and anger that’s inside so many of them.”
“Does that mean all of the students here come from a difficult background?” she asked.
“Quite a few. Some have been abandoned. Some have been abused. Some have behavioral issues that can’t be blamed on any of those things.”
“You mean like autism.”
“We have a few autistic students but only those who are highly functioning. More often it’s something else—a chemical imbalance, genetic factors. No one can say for sure. Some brains are just wired differently than others.”
“Those boys must be the toughest to reach.”
“Sometimes we don’t reach them at all. But, that said, we’re going to reach all we can.”
Cora could easily imagine the rich parents of a boy who had behavioral problems being willing to pay a large sum to enroll him at the ranch. But how could orphans afford such a school? “What about the costs associated with coming here—for those who don’t have parents, I mean? Does another member of the family pay for it? Or maybe the state?”
“We get some state assistance, we have private benefactors and we do two big fund-raisers a year. As much as thirty percent of our students come here without paying a dime. This year, that equates to eighty students. But as long as we can meet our monthly expenses, I’m satisfied. If we have extra, I’d much rather use it to try to save another boy.”
Cora almost felt guilty that she’d be taking a salary. She nearly spoke up to say she could make do with less, but she knew that wasn’t the case. In LA, she’d been able to augment her income by waiting tables on the weekends. Chances were, in such a small community, she wouldn’t have the opportunity to get a second job. “That’s very noble of you.”
Aiyana gestured as if she wasn’t interested in praise. “I only mention it so that you’ll understand what’s important to me. It isn’t turning a profit—it’s making a difference. And I’m looking to work with people who are as invested in the progress of these boys as I am.”
“I understand. I’ll do my best,” Cora said. “But...why have you focused exclusively on helping boys? Why not girls? Or girls and boys? Do you have a strong gender preference or—”
“No. Not at all. I didn’t want the added responsibility of mixing the two genders, knew it wouldn’t be easy to keep them apart,” she said with a chuckle. “The boys who come here have enough to worry about without adding that kind of temptation. This is a time for them to focus on getting their lives in order. Hopefully, as a result, they’ll make better husbands and fathers later.”
“You’re saying it was purely a practical decision.”
“Absolutely. Someday, on the opposite side of town, I’d like to open a school exclusively for girls, and do essentially the same thing. Now that I have Elijah handling so much around here, that’s more of a possibility than ever before. I just haven’t geared up for the push it will require.”
“I’m sure you’ll do equally well with girls.” At least now she knew that her mother hadn’t given her up because she didn’t like girls. Perhaps that’d been a silly thought to begin with, but Cora couldn’t help searching for The Reason. Maybe that was all she really needed to know in order to be satisfied...
“We’ll see. Now, I’ve been told you’ll be moving into the housing on campus. But have you seen where you’ll be living?”
“Not yet. Mr. Turner showed me the school and some other parts of the property, but he didn’t offer me the position until after I got home, so we didn’t go inside the faculty housing.”
“Well, the cottages aren’t big, by any stretch of the imagination, but I like being able to include them in the package we offer our teachers. I figure discounted rent might tempt them into staying for a while.” She grinned. “Longer than a year.”
This comment revealed that Aiyana was well aware of her arrangement with Elijah. “It’s a nice benefit.”
“You’ll find we’re more like a family here than what you’ve most likely experienced in the past,” she said with a wink.
A family... Those two words nearly caused Cora to burst into tears. Aiyana had no idea how literal their connection was.
As Cora followed Aiyana out of the building, she couldn’t help thinking back, over all the different ways she’d imagined her mother while growing up. As a drug addict who didn’t care about anything except her next hit. As a prostitute eager to rid herself of the child from an unwanted pregnancy. As “the other woman,” abandoned by her lover after telling him she was going to have his child. As a businesswoman who refused to allow motherhood to get in the way of her ambition. There were more, but each scenario provided a ready excuse for adoption. She’d never pictured Aiyana like she was—soft-spoken, seemingly wise, well educated, accomplished, stable, kind, loving and devoted to a cause.
Cora had expected that just by meeting her mother so many of her questions would be answered. But she was more baffled than ever. What happened twenty-eight years ago? Why would someone like Aiyana Turner put her only child up for adoption?
Chapter Two (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
“So...do you like the woman you’ll be working for?”
Cora was packing up the kitchen of her condo in Burbank with Lilly when Lilly asked this question. For a second, Cora froze, fearing her adoptive mother had figured out the reason she was moving to Silver Springs. But when Lilly kept wrapping glasses in newspaper and putting them into the box she was filling, it became apparent she was merely making conversation. She didn’t know—not yet, thank goodness.
“I do.” She forced a smile despite the discomfort her deception caused. “She seems really nice.” Although Cora had been home for a week, getting ready for her big move, she hadn’t been able to quit thinking about Aiyana. She’d spent nearly every extra minute on the internet, doing searches on all of the teachers and many of the students who’d graduated from New Horizons—whatever names she could cull from their website, including a graduate who had turned into a professional football player, one who’d just recently been accused of killing the couple who adopted him when he came to the ranch at fifteen and Elijah Turner, who’d hired her. Only one article had come up on him, but it told a lot. When he was ten years old, he’d been kept in a cage like some animal in the basement of his parents’ house, and starved until he was only sixty pounds.
Imagining what he’d been through turned Cora’s stomach. What kind of people could do that to one of their own children? And where were those people now? Did he know?
Considering what he’d been through, it was no wonder the man was so guarded, so aloof—and so devoted to Aiyana and New Horizons.
“I can’t believe you’ll be staying right there on the property,” Lilly said.
“The school is about ten miles outside of town, so it’ll save me from the daily drive.”
“What drive? Ten miles is nothing,” Lilly scoffed. “The people in Silver Springs must have no idea how long it takes to go two blocks in LA when the traffic is bad.”
“Or they do know, and that’s why they live there.” Cora held up her blender. She made a lot of smoothies and “green” drinks, but her machine was nearly worn-out. Was it worth taking with her—or was it time to get a new one?
Newspaper crinkled as Lilly continued to wrap. “Traffic or no, I could never leave the city.”
Brad’s office was only a few blocks from their house. He’d been so successful managing other people’s money that he could set his own hours. And Lilly did charity work, mostly on nights and weekends. “You two are in the kind of situation that makes it easy to stay. Traffic isn’t a huge part of the equation for you.”
“Our lives haven’t always been so perfect,” she said.
Reluctantly, Cora put her blender in the pile for Goodwill. “No. You’ve worked hard for what you have,” she agreed and meant it.
Her mother stopped packing long enough to squeeze her shoulder. “You’ll build something, too, honey.”
“I hope so.” Right now it felt as if Ashton, her brother, was going to be the one to make them proud. Although Lilly and Brad hadn’t been too pleased when he left law school to become a movie producer, he already had an indie film out that’d garnered several awards, so they were less critical of his decision than they once were. “From this vantage point, it looks like I have a long way to go.”
“It all comes with time.”
Cora checked the clock on the wall. Jill, an assistant to a film editor at Universal, would be getting off work any minute. Cora had been hoping to be done by then, so they could meet some other friends for drinks, but there was a lot yet to pack. “Is Ashton going to be able to make it to my goodbye dinner on Sunday?”
“I’m sure he will. Your brother adores you.”
“Slightly less than he adores all of the women he’s dating,” she grumbled.
“That’s not true!”
It wasn’t entirely true, but Cora had been feeling a little neglected by her brother since he’d turned into such a big shot and become so busy.
The packing tape screeched as her mother closed and sealed the box she’d filled. “Does Aiyana Turner offer discounted housing to all the teachers at the ranch?”
The scent of the marker Lilly used to label the box “Kitchen—Fragile” rose to Cora’s nostrils. “She can’t. There’s not enough for everyone—just a handful of small cottages on the far side of the property, away from the school and the boys’ dorms.”
“So who looks after the boys at night?”
“Each floor has a live-in monitor they call a ‘big brother’ who makes sure the boys go to bed at lights-out, get up for school, study during study time and clean their rooms.”
“Are they teachers, too?”
“No. Most work in town during the day. I was told that some even drive to Santa Barbara. It’s merely a way to acquire free lodging, kind of like managing an apartment building.”
“How does—what’s her name, Aiyana Turner?—decide who gets the other housing?”
“Every teacher has the option to add their name to the waiting list and move in if one becomes available. I just happened to hire on at the right time. The teacher who quit left earlier than planned, and my unit wasn’t spoken for—probably because it’s so small. It wouldn’t be big enough for anyone with kids.”
“So where do the other teachers live? In town?”
“I’m assuming they do. Although I suppose some might live in Santa Barbara. It’s only about twenty minutes away, not a long commute by our standards.”
The packing tape screamed again as her mother built a new box. “But will there be enough of a social life for you in Silver Springs? I mean...if you’re living on campus, will you ever get out? How will you meet people?”
“I’ll meet the other teachers.”
“Who will most likely be older or married.”
“I really won’t know until I get there.”
Lilly straightened and rested her hands on her hips. “There’s more to life than work, honey. A year might not sound long right now, but, trust me, it’ll seem long if you have no one to do anything with that whole time.”
“I can always drive home, visit you guys, Jill, my other friends.”
“I hope you come home often. But...what about the man who hired you? Maybe you can get something going with him. Jill told me you said he was hot.”
Thank you, Jill. “He is hot, but...”
“What does he look like?”
Cora pictured the dark-headed, rather intimidating man who’d shown her around the ranch. He didn’t say too much, certainly didn’t waste words. But those blue eyes were laser-sharp. They didn’t miss a thing. Truth be told, he made her uncomfortable. “Sort of like...a pirate.”
Her mother opened another cupboard and started packing the plates. “A pirate? That’s a positive association?”
“In this case it is.” Mostly... When it came to his physical appearance, anyway.
“How tall is he?”
Cora put her salsa maker, which she’d barely used, in one of the boxes she planned to take with her. If she was going to live in the country, she was going to attend a farmer’s market occasionally and make homemade salsa. “Really tall. And built.”
“He sounds perfect.”
“Not perfect exactly.” That was what she found most compelling about him—that he was a little rough around the edges. “He’s got a fairly big scar on his face.” She indicated the line of her jaw. “Right here.”
“What’s that from?”
“I didn’t ask.” And now that she’d read the article chronicling some of the abuse he’d suffered, she wouldn’t. “As far as I know, he’s already married.”
“Did you see a ring?”
“I didn’t look,” she said, but that was a lie. She had looked—and seen no ring. She’d been curious about Elijah from the first moment they met. But she’d also been apprehensive about the fact that she’d had an ulterior motive for applying at New Horizons, had known he probably wouldn’t appreciate that she wasn’t being fully transparent.
Her mother grinned at her. “You should have.”
“Matt and I barely broke up, Mom. I’m not ready to start dating again, especially in a place where I don’t plan to stay.” Besides, she wasn’t sure she’d be capable of taking on a man as complex as Elijah. There was no telling what kind of scars his upbringing had created, and she wasn’t referring to the one on his face, although that could easily be part of the legacy his parents had left him.
“So you’re only staying there a year?” her mother said.
“That’s right.”
“I can’t tell you how happy I am to hear it’s temporary.” Lilly bent to give her a hug. “I love you, you know.”
Cora did know. And she was grateful. She could easily have gone to a family who weren’t so kind and accepting—a family like Elijah had known. “I love you, too,” she said and tried to ignore how selfish she felt for doing what she was doing in spite of the fact it would hurt Lilly if—or when—she found out.
* * *
Elijah Turner was brushing down his horse when Aiyana found him. At the sound of her footsteps, he didn’t need to turn in order to see who it was. If he didn’t come for dinner when she invited him, she tracked him down. She always acted as if she had some official reason, some business question to ask him, but he knew she was simply assuring herself that he was okay. Whenever he complained that he was too old for that kind of coddling, she’d say it didn’t matter, that he’d always be her boy.
“How was your ride?” she asked.
He lifted Atsila’s foot and used a pick to gently clean his horse’s front left hoof. “Relaxing.”
“Cora Kelly arrives tomorrow.”
“I know.”
“Is the cottage ready?”
He moved on to the other front hoof. “Of course.”
“Are you ever going to explain that decision to me?”
“What decision?” he said, but he knew what she was going to say before she explained.
“To hire Cora Kelly. You knew, as well as I did, that Gary Seton, from right here in Silver Springs, was waiting for that job to open up.”
“I interviewed Gary, too—gave him a chance.”
“And...”
“I thought Ms. Kelly was better suited for the position.”
“She’s pretty.”
“That had nothing to do with it.”
“Let’s say that’s true—you’re not worried that she might be a distraction to the boys?”
“You’re saying I should’ve discriminated against her because she’s attractive?”
She gave his shoulder a little shove. “Stop it.”
“You were talking about her looks!”
“Because I wanted to see if you agreed with me.”
“That she’s pretty? I’d have to be blind not to see that.”
“So...do I surmise a bit of interest on your part?”
“None. I’m not the marrying type. You should know that by now.”
“I’d like grandkids at some point.”
“You have plenty of other sons to give you grandkids.”
She sighed as if he was being purposely stubborn. “Fine. Obviously, you don’t like talking about this subject.”
He didn’t argue. There were moments he wondered if he truly wanted to be alone for the rest of his life. But he also saw nothing to be gained from allowing his happiness to hang on the love or will of another person.
“You missed dinner tonight,” his mother said.
“You said to come by if I was hungry.”
“You should’ve been hungry. It’s nearly eight.”
“We’ve talked about this before,” he responded. “I’m too old for you to worry about.”
“You’ll never be too old for me to worry about. And you know why? It’s called caring.”
His problem was that he had the tendency to care too much, to be too intense. “I’m fine.” He started on Atsila’s fourth and final hoof. “I’ll grab a bite while I’m in town tonight.”
She leaned against the fence post. “Whoa, don’t tell me you’re leaving the ranch for a social outing. You don’t do that very often.”
He gave her a look that let her know he didn’t appreciate the sarcasm.
Unperturbed, she smiled. “Your dark looks don’t frighten me the way they do everyone else.”
“They should.”
“Why? I know you love me, even if you rarely say it.”
“What good are words?” His parents used to claim they loved him, but they only loved themselves and the twisted joy they received from tormenting him. “Words are empty, meaningless.”
“Hopefully, someday, you’ll regain your trust.”
He winked at her. “Don’t hold your breath. But... I am very grateful for everything you’ve done for me. I hope you know that.”
“Stop!” She started to walk away.
“What?” he called after her.
“That wasn’t a leading statement. I’m not looking for your gratitude.”
She wasn’t comfortable with it, either. “You want me to fall in love.”
“I want you to be able to fall in love. I want to see you lose your heart—and not be afraid to let it go. Then I can rest easy, knowing you’re completely fulfilled.”
“You never married,” he pointed out, but she offered the usual lame excuse.
“Because I’m married to this place.”
Knowing that was all he’d ever get out of her on the subject, he studied her retreating figure. “Yeah, well, so am I.”
Chapter Three (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
Cora was using her Bluetooth to talk to Jill when she passed through the wrought iron arch at the opening of the school, her car packed full of her belongings. “I’m here,” she announced as she wound slowly around to where she’d be living.
“That didn’t take long. What time did you leave again?”
She’d gone in to hug her friend goodbye, but Jill, dead asleep, had mumbled something about missing Cora, promised to call and dropped back onto the pillows. “Six.”
“That’s not even two hours ago.”
“See? I’m not that far away.” Although...it almost seemed as if she’d moved to another planet; Silver Springs was nothing like LA.
“I should’ve come with you,” Jill said.
“How?” Cora asked. “You have to be to work in an hour.”
“I could’ve called in sick. You need someone to be there to help you unpack.”
“No, I don’t. My mother would’ve been hurt if she found out I let you come, since I told her I preferred to organize everything on my own.” Cora had definitely not wanted Lilly on the ranch. She knew Lilly had never met Aiyana, that the whole adoption had been handled through an agency. According to the documents her private investigator had uncovered, Aiyana had demanded absolute secrecy. But that didn’t change Cora’s need to keep the two women apart. “I can handle this. The cottage is furnished. And everything I’m bringing fits into my car. It’s not as if I’m towing a trailer.”
“Still, I’m curious.”
“About...”
“The ranch, for one thing. What does it look like?”
“Your basic high school, but with horses and cattle—and some dorms and a machine shop. You’ll see it when you come visit me.”
“I’ve been to Ojai but never Silver Springs. How does it compare?”
“The towns are similar, which makes sense. Silver Springs is located in the same valley, has some of the same mission-style architecture. Only they’ve added a few murals in Silver Springs, like they’ve done in Exeter.”
“Where’s Exeter?”
“Central part of the state.” Cora pulled into the drive that would be her drive for the next year and cut the engine. “My mom took me there once to show me the murals, thought I’d be interested because of my art degree.”
“I’m not that big on murals,” Jill said. “I’ve seen some pretty bad ones.”
“I’ve seen a lot that are worse than the ones they have here. The man who painted the one downtown interviewed for my job. I’m still surprised they didn’t hire him instead.”
“They told you who you were up against?”
“Aiyana and Elijah didn’t. When Aiyana showed me the house, she got a call on her cell, leaving me to speak with a neighbor. He said Gary Seton was a friend of his and was really disappointed.”
“Why didn’t they hire him?” Jill asked.
Cora gazed at her bungalow, trying to imagine calling this place home for the next twelve months. “I’m not sure. I would’ve guessed they’d prefer a local.”
“Could it be that Elijah wanted you to come to town?”
“No. I didn’t get those vibes at all.”
“So you think he’s married?”
“Not married.” There was too much sexual energy surrounding him for him to be in a committed relationship. She could tell he found her attractive—couldn’t help finding him attractive, too. A woman would have to be dead not to feel a little sizzle when a man like Elijah Turner came around. “Just completely closed off.”
“I’ve seen you approach guys before. You’ve never been afraid of a challenge.”
In this situation, she was. She had a lot to cope with already, didn’t need to add a romantic relationship into the mix. Even if she could manage to gain Elijah’s attention, she doubted she’d be able to keep it for long. He was too remote. “I’m only here for a year.”
“That could prove to be a very long year if you plan to remain celibate the whole time,” she joked.
“I’ll survive.” Although...she was already missing certain aspects of her relationship with Matt and, if she was being honest, sex was one of them. “It’d be kind of odd to hit up the man my mother adopted.”
“Why? You’re not related by blood. You didn’t even grow up together. For all intents and purposes, you’re part of a different family. You’re a Kelly.”
Cora dug through her purse, searching for the house key Aiyana had provided her. “On paper.”
“More than on paper! You’ve spent your whole life with the Kellys.”
“I was talking from a strictly literal perspective. But that reaction right there is part of my problem.”
“What do you mean?”
“Am I being ungrateful simply by wanting to know my birth mother? That tears me up inside, because I am grateful. I love my parents dearly.”
“It’s the same with regular parents. All kids should be grateful and aware of their parents’ sacrifice.”
“No, it’s not the same. There’s a sense of entitlement with children who’ve been kept and raised by their biological parents that doesn’t extend to me. Anyway, let’s not get caught up in all of that. Bottom line, people would look askance at Elijah and me if we ever admitted to having the same mother.”
“You wouldn’t admit that, because you don’t have the same mother.”
Cora groaned to show her frustration. “It’s murky. You have to give me that. Regardless, Elijah makes me jealous.” So did the other boys Aiyana had accepted into her life. That Aiyana would give Cora away and then take in eight other children left Cora feeling hurt, baffled. “He holds such a prominent place in Aiyana’s heart that it makes me wonder why she wanted him and not me.”
“We’ve talked about this.”
She climbed out of the vehicle and circled around to grab the suitcase that held her essentials. “You believe she feels the need to fix things—fix people.”
“You told me he had a rough childhood. The other boys probably did, too.”
Other than her ex-boyfriend, Jill was the only person she’d confided in about her search for her biological mother, her true purpose in coming to Silver Springs, and the background of the man who’d hired her. “No doubt. Elijah’s defies imagination. Which only makes me feel worse. When I think of what he’s been through, I can’t even be jealous without an avalanche of guilt. Considering the emotions he dredges up, I doubt he and I should even be friends.”
Jill ignored her uncomfortable laugh. “There were a number of years between the time Aiyana gave you up and adopted him. Her situation must’ve changed, that’s all.”
Since both hands were full, Cora used her hip to close the car door. “Maybe that’s it.”
“You can’t always assume the worst.”
“It’s hard not to. Especially now that I see how functional she is. I mean...if she were a down-on-her-luck prostitute, I could point to that and say, Makes sense.”
“The fact that she isn’t a down-on-her-luck prostitute is why you’re interested in getting to know her. There’s promise there. You believe she might be someone you’d like to have in your life. That’s what scares you. You’re afraid she’ll reject you a second time.”
Cora had to set her suitcase down to let herself into the house. “Do you have to be so frank?”
“It’s important to know when fear’s doing the talking—to keep things straight in your head.”
“It could be a while before anything’s straight in my head—another reason I’d be crazy to get involved with Elijah, even if he were open to a relationship, which I can tell he’s not.”
“Fine. You won’t listen to me, anyway. You’re too busy throwing up roadblocks.”
Cora wasn’t sure she felt any better now that Jill had conceded. She sort of liked it when Jill was arguing the other side. Maybe that was because she did find it hard not to think about Elijah. Even though she’d been almost completely focused on the fact that she’d just found her birth mother when she had that interview with him, she couldn’t help wondering what was going on behind those inscrutable eyes... “You were never given up for adoption. You grew up in a big, boisterous, happy family. You can’t relate.”
“I’ve tried to be understanding,” Jill said.
“I’m sorry,” Cora responded. “I don’t know where that came from. It was uncalled for.”
“You’re angry. That’s where it comes from. And I can see why. But I’m on your side.”
Cora opened her mouth to say she believed that, but before she could formulate the words, she heard a car engine and turned. What she saw wasn’t a car; it was a silver truck. And Elijah was behind the wheel. As he parked in front of her house and jumped out, she felt her pulse leap. “I’ve got to go,” she told Jill.
“Why? What’s up?”
She ducked her head so she could speak without being overheard. “He’s here,” she whispered and clicked the button on her Bluetooth that would disconnect them.
* * *
Cora was wearing a silky orange tank with a pair of white linen shorts that showed off her long, tan legs. As Elijah approached with the orientation materials he’d brought, he found those legs to be distracting. But she was a teacher at New Horizons. That meant he couldn’t get involved with her, even on a casual basis. Contrary to what his mother seemed to believe—and probably everyone else who was surprised he hadn’t hired Gary—he hadn’t offered her the position because he had any romantic interest in her. He’d been impressed with her portfolio. Each piece—a sculpture, a painting, a photograph and a piece of pottery—moved him in some way. He liked that she could make him, someone who knew very little about art, feel something. Gary Seton’s work simply hadn’t been the same.
One piece that Cora had brought, the conceptual sculpture of a mother cradling a child, affected him deeply. When she’d unveiled it during their interview, it’d been hard for him not to stop and stare. He’d wanted to keep it—not because he felt he needed that kind of love. No one would ever be able to hurt him again. He wanted the boys here at the ranch to experience the safety and security that piece inspired, and he wanted to give them a teacher who could not only depict that emotion but understand it, feel it.
Because he knew Gary was disappointed, he hoped he’d made the right choice. Fortunately, the sensitivity he saw in the large brown eyes staring up at him as he drew closer reassured him. She’d wanted the job even worse than Gary. He wasn’t sure why—if she’d needed to get out of whatever situation she was in or was on her last dollar—but he’d been able to feel her eagerness during their interview and he’d responded to that. Maybe this woman would never be able to teach the boys how to create a decent picture or vase, but she should be able to entice them to see the beauty of the world. She was part of the beauty of the world. And she seemed open and vulnerable to the point that he almost felt he should warn her to be careful or life would chew her up and spit her out. After what he’d experienced, that she could get so far without learning that lesson was a bit of a shock to him.
“Hello,” she said.
“I see you made it safely.”
“Yes.”
He motioned toward the older BMW X3 sitting in the drive. “Can I give you a hand with anything?”
“No, it’s okay. I was careful when I packed—didn’t make the boxes too heavy. I can grab it.”
“Are you sure?”
She nodded, so he handed her the orientation manual he’d brought over. “I doubt you’ll care to read all of this. Watching paint dry would be more interesting. But there’s a table of contents. I figured you could glance through, check out any topics you’re curious about and become familiar with how we do things around here.”
“I’ll take a look at it.” When she hugged it to her ample chest, he decided her body was partly what he found so attractive about her. She wasn’t as skinny as some of the girls he’d dated. She was curvy—looked soft, comfortable, sexy.
He searched his pocket for the more important part of what he’d come to give her. “Here’s a key to the high school, as well as one to the art and ceramics rooms. With school starting next week, you’ll be eager to set those up.”
“Definitely. Thank you.”
“You bet. You received the group email about the staff meeting tonight?”
“I did. That’s why I came a few days earlier than I would have otherwise.”
“Great. I’ll see you there.” He started back toward his truck. “Everyone is eager to meet you.”
“Mr. Turner?”
“Call me Eli,” he said as he turned.
“Okay, Eli it is. Where, exactly, is the meeting tonight? You showed me the library when we toured campus the day I interviewed, but I’m a little turned around at the moment.”
He went back and flipped past the syllabus he’d given her to the campus map on the next page. “You’re here,” he said, and drew a line from her house to the library so she could easily find her way.
“Thank you.”
“Sure,” he said. But instead of leaving, he went over to her SUV and began unloading the boxes. He just couldn’t leave a woman to do that alone, not when it would be so much easier for him.
“Whoa, I can get those,” she said, hurrying out to him. “Really.”
“There’s no need for you to carry all of this stuff by yourself. Just point to where it should go. It’ll only take me fifteen minutes.”
As promised, in a short time, he had her vehicle completely unloaded.
“Thank you,” she said as he put down the last box.
“See you later.” His conscience appeased, he started toward his truck.
“Eli?”
He stopped again. “Yes?”
“I—I have a boyfriend. Sort of.”
He felt his eyebrows slide up. Then he almost laughed. She was assuming he had an ulterior motive for helping her. “I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression,” he said. “I was only trying to make your move a little easier.”
Her cheeks bloomed red. “Right. Of course you were. I’m sorry.”
* * *
Cora’s face burned as she watched Eli drive off. “What’s wrong with you?” she muttered to herself. “Of course he was just trying to help. It’s not as if he asked for your number.”
That blunder actually said more about her than it did him, she realized. He hadn’t been anything but circumspect. She was the one who’d had a difficult time keeping her eyes off him. She was so aware of him on a sexual level that it was hard to act as if she wasn’t, which was odd. She couldn’t remember having such a strong reaction to any other man. That was the reason she’d suddenly tried to throw up a barrier. She’d been hoping to give him a reason to look at her differently—or stay away entirely—and wound up making a fool of herself instead.
“I told you I didn’t need your help,” she grumbled to him even though he was gone, and cringed at the prospect of having to face him at the staff meeting in a few hours.
“You had to do that on your first day here, Cora?” she said as she started to unpack.
Her phone dinged to let her know she’d received a text, and she paused to pull it out of her pocket.
Jill. What’d “dark and brooding” have to say?
Dark and brooding. How apropos. But since she was still writhing with embarrassment, Cora didn’t want to talk about Eli, so she scowled at the clock. Aren’t you at work?
You know I am. I was talking to you while driving here.
I don’t want to get you in trouble for being on the phone. I’ll call you later.
Is that a dodge?
Yes. But as long as her friend was willing to risk getting caught on a personal call at work, Cora figured she might as well break the news. He said he’s not interested in me.
What? Seriously?
Seriously.
But...you just got there.
Cora shoved a hand through her hair as she recalled his startled expression. Yeah, it came up quick. Thanks to her...
How? He couldn’t have come by just to let you know he’s not interested.
Again Cora hesitated, but when she didn’t respond her friend sent her a question mark, so she typed, I brought it up.
At that point, texting fell by the wayside. Jill called to make her explain the whole thing.
“Oh jeez,” she said when Cora was done. “I should never have let you go there without me. I could tell you were rattled, nervous.”
“I’ll get my feet underneath me. I’m just...not myself at the moment. The prospect of rubbing elbows with my birth mother has me...floundering a bit. I was expecting that to be difficult, but when I started this whole thing, I was not expecting my mother to have adopted a son who...”
“Who...” Jill pressed.
She pictured the muscles that bulged in Eli’s arms as he hefted box after box into her cottage. She really wanted to touch the smooth curve of his biceps. But it was the size of his broad chest and wide shoulders that really made her short of breath. “Who somehow gets under my skin!”
“To whom you feel an immediate attraction, you mean.”
“He’s good-looking. That’s all,” she said, hoping to minimize it.
“That’s why you told him, out of the blue, that you have a boyfriend as if you were accusing him of hitting on you? Because he’s good-looking? What were you thinking?”
“I don’t know! I was merely attempting to wall off the possibility. So I wouldn’t even consider it. That’s not too weird, is it?”
“You might’ve gotten ahead of yourself, but... I’m guessing you succeeded. I doubt he’s hoping for anything now, so you can relax.”
Cora took a deep breath. Jill was right. Maybe she hadn’t done it gracefully, but she’d put Elijah Turner on notice that she wasn’t a romantic possibility. Even if he hadn’t considered her one to begin with, establishing certain boundaries was important to her. She needed to focus, to keep her life simple while she was here so that she could do a good job for the kids at the ranch while getting to know Aiyana. If she decided she wanted to be part of Aiyana’s life, she’d eventually have to determine if Aiyana wanted to be part of hers—and break the news. Imagine how awkward it would be if the answer to that question was no and yet she was seeing Eli!
“It’s better that we covered it early.”
“If you say so. How’s the cottage?”
“Small but cute.” She wandered over to a Mason jar filled with wildflowers that someone had left on her table. It was a thoughtful touch, one she hoped Eli wasn’t responsible for...
“I can’t wait to see it.” Jill suddenly lowered her voice. “I’ve got to go. My boss is here.”
Cora wasn’t even sure she said goodbye when they disconnected. Her attention had switched entirely to a small card she found beside the flowers.
Welcome to New Horizons. We are so excited to have you here.
Aiyana
Bending slightly, Cora put her nose to one of the delicate yellow poppies that made up the bulk of the arrangement. “I hope you’ll be just as glad once you learn who I am,” she said as she exhaled.
Chapter Four (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
“So you’re the new art teacher.”
Cora smiled at the middle-aged man with thick glasses who sat on her right side. “Yes.”
“Ah. Makes sense at last.”
“What makes sense?” she asked, but he didn’t get the chance to answer—or even introduce himself. Aiyana stood near the circulation desk and called the staff to order. Cora felt she knew where the man had been going with that comment, anyway. Everyone thought she’d gotten the job based on her looks. Otherwise, Gary Something-or-Other would’ve gotten it.
“Thank you all for coming,” Aiyana said. “Although we had a few of you here during the summer, handling one program or another, classes were limited. So I hope, now that the rest of you are back, you feel refreshed, because I’m anticipating one of the best years in ranch history.”
As Aiyana spoke, Cora glanced around. There were thirtysomething people in the room, an assortment of teachers and support staff, but she couldn’t see anyone even close to her own age. Half the people seemed to be in their forties, the other half in their fifties. A few looked even older.
She was beginning to believe Jill and her mother were right: the next year was going to be terribly lonely...
“Before we get started, let’s go over a few of the changes that have occurred in the past two and a half months. First, we will have 256 students when we start classes on the twenty-eighth, up from 223 last year. That’s a significant increase, so we’ll have to watch out for the newcomers and help them feel at home. We also have a new football coach—Larry Sanders, who played in the pros thirteen years ago. Larry couldn’t be here tonight due to a family commitment, but he’s been practicing with the boys for over a month. I believe he’ll be a real asset to our sports program—at least that’s what Elijah tells me. As most of you know, Elijah is our athletic director in addition to many other things—basically whatever he needs to be in order for the ranch to operate smoothly.”
Cora’s neighbor leaned over. “Someone with real experience, huh? Maybe we’ll finally win a game,” he muttered.
Cora didn’t respond; she was too interested in witnessing the pride on Aiyana’s face when she looked at her adopted son. They were close. That was obvious without either one of them having to say a word—but as nice as that was for Elijah, Cora found it a bit disheartening. Was there any room in Aiyana’s heart for her?
Cora didn’t get the impression there was, but she didn’t have the chance to think about it for too long. Aiyana was moving on.
“Not only do we have a new football coach, we have a new art instructor.” She stretched out her hand in invitation. “Cora, will you please stand?”
Elijah’s eyes seemed to cut right through Cora as she got to her feet. Why she could feel the weight of his gaze and not anyone else’s, she couldn’t say, but she’d been struggling to ignore him since she walked into this meeting.
After a nod to acknowledge all the smiling faces that were turned to see the new art instructor, she sank back into her seat.
Aiyana was talking about how they were going to allow student government to run the assemblies from now on when the man next to her leaned over again. “Where have you taught before?” he asked.
After his earlier comment, Cora almost provided the name of the high school that had offered her a permanent position a few weeks ago, but a quick word with Aiyana or Elijah would too easily reveal the truth, since she’d been honest with them. “I’ve never had a permanent position.”
“You’re a brand-new teacher?”
“Relatively new,” she admitted. “I’ve been subbing for six years.”
“Do you have any idea how difficult some of the boys who come here can be?”
Aiyana hadn’t given the bad behavior Cora was likely to encounter much emphasis. But Cora had known from the beginning that this school wasn’t for the well-adjusted. “I understand that most of the boys come from a very difficult background,” she replied. “But it shouldn’t be too much of a change. You should see how some regular students treat substitutes,” she joked.
The man laughed but quickly sobered. “Subbing isn’t easy. Kids will get away with whatever they can. Still, for an attractive young woman of your age—”
“I’m nearly thirty,” she broke in, but she had to wonder—in her hurry to get close to Aiyana, had she given what she might face here enough weight?
“Still,” the man said. “It won’t be easy. I hope you haven’t gotten in over your head.”
When Cora glanced up, she happened to catch Elijah watching her. He didn’t look away, as she expected him to; he continued to measure her with those enigmatic eyes. Was he experiencing any doubts about having hired her?
Possibly. Probably. She hated to even consider that. But if she had to fight to find her place in the world, she’d do it. She supposed, in that respect, she wasn’t much different from Elijah or the other boys who’d come through here, or were still attending.
“I’ll be fine,” she said—and hoped it was true.
* * *
“I see you met Sean Travers.”
Cora recognized Elijah’s voice even before she turned to see him standing at her elbow. Why he’d put her through the discomfort approaching her was bound to cause, however, she couldn’t say.
“The guy who was sitting next to me?” she asked.
“Yes. Our science teacher—or ranch pessimist, depending on how well you know him.”
She nibbled at the cookie she’d just snagged from the refreshment table. “He doesn’t think I’m capable of teaching here. I guess I look too young and delicate to handle the boys who act out.”
“Does that shake your confidence?”
“I admit I’m a little worried. Everyone seems to believe the job should’ve gone to a man named Gary...”
“Seton,” he filled in as he handed her a cup of punch. “Because he’s local—they know him.”
“But...”
“It wasn’t their decision,” he said simply.
She couldn’t help envying him his long, dark eyelashes. She knew she had pretty eyes—guys told her that all the time—but she felt his were prettier. “No. It was yours. So...can you tell me why?”
“Why I chose you?”
“I know it isn’t what they all seem to think. You made that clear earlier.”
He took a sip of his own punch. “As far as I’m concerned, your competition has no...vision.”
“Am I supposed to understand what that means?”
His massive shoulders lifted in a shrug. “I wasn’t impressed with his work.”
“You were impressed with mine?”
“You’re talented,” he said evenly. “Perhaps more than you know.”
“I’m teaching art, not selling it. I’m guessing he was at least proficient.”
Elijah finally shifted that unnerving gaze away from her. “You have to understand certain concepts to be able to teach them.”
“What concepts are you specifically referring to?” she asked, but someone else approached him at that moment, interrupting, and he turned away without answering.
Since Eli fell deep into conversation with a woman who looked sixty or so and was concerned about a particular student Cora had no way of knowing, she felt awkward standing there waiting for the chance to speak to him again. So she gave them some privacy by carrying her punch over to the corner. She was looking for an unobtrusive vantage point from which to observe her birth mother. Aiyana was mingling with the staff. But then Cora saw the science teacher who’d sat next to her approach Aiyana and knew, when they both glanced in her direction, that they were talking about her. Sean Travers was expressing his reservations.
Disgruntled that this man she’d barely met would jump to conclusions based on her age and gender, and start to advocate against her, Cora finished her punch, dropped the paper cup in the wastebasket and left the library. Her phone kept vibrating in her pocket anyway, making her feel as if someone really needed to reach her.
When she got outside and felt she could check, caller ID indicated it was her father.
Gazing up at more stars than she’d ever seen in the sky before, she wandered around the campus as she spoke to him. Most of the students were away, at home if they had a home to go to, for a quick holiday before classes started in earnest, so the campus was quiet, especially this far from the outdoor basketball courts and the dorms.
“So are you going to like it there?” her father asked.
She tried to let the energy in his voice help lift the depression that had set in. “It’s definitely going to be a change.”
“A positive one, though, right?”
“Sure,” she said, kicking a small pebble across the sidewalk.
“Whoa. Is something wrong?”
“It’s just different, that’s all. I’m not used to smelling manure at night. Or seeing stars that shine so bright.”
“The manure can’t be pleasant, but the stars sound nice.”
“They are nice. And the manure isn’t all that bad, not if I stay away from the livestock pens. I guess it’s more that... I’m beginning to wonder what made me think I could handle teenage boys who have significant behavioral issues.” She’d mostly been thinking of her own emotional issues, not the responsibility she would feel to be a guiding light to teenage boys who’d lost their way. Was she bound to disappoint Aiyana and Elijah and let her students down?
She couldn’t abide the thought of failure.
“Don’t make it too complicated, babe,” her father said.
“In what way?”
“Everyone responds to love.”
“I have to do more than love them, Dad. I have to teach them. And what if they won’t let me?”
“If you love them, they’ll trust you. Love and trust come first. Then you’ll be able to teach. I promise you.”
She thought of Gary Seton. Maybe he had no “vision,” whatever Elijah meant by that. But she was willing to bet he’d be firmer when it came to meting out discipline. She didn’t want to punish anyone. “I’m not sure why these people hired me,” she grumbled.
“They must’ve seen what your mother and I see in you.”
“And that is...”
“You can do anything.”
Tears filled her eyes. She was tired, which made her emotional. But she was also experiencing a little culture shock, and she missed her family already. “Maybe I was a bit hasty making the decision to come here, Dad.”
“It’s only for a year, honey. Do your best. That’s all anyone can ask. And come see us when you can.”
She wiped her cheeks as she told him she loved him. But she felt even worse after she disconnected. She had good parents. The conversation she’d just had with her father proved it yet again. So why was she betraying them?
* * *
The moment she got back to her cottage, Cora went straight to bed. She had a lot of unpacking yet to do, but she figured that could wait. She needed sleep, knew it would help her cope with all the recent changes—as well as the uncertainty.
Fortunately, she felt a lot better when she woke up. She spent the morning unpacking the rest of her belongings and stacking the cardboard from the boxes in her SUV so she could take it to a recycling center. Then she decided to go into town to look around, have lunch and buy a few groceries. Someone—she guessed Aiyana since Aiyana had also been responsible for the flowers—had put a few essentials, like eggs, bread and milk, in her fridge, but the cupboards needed to be stocked.
Cora was halfway to town when she saw a man on horseback galloping down a dirt road off to her right. She would’ve thought nothing of it—she could only see the rider from the back as he wove in and out of the trees between them—but she recognized the man. It was Elijah Turner!
She pulled over and angled her head to see through the passenger window, trying to get a better look. He was something else. A puzzle. What drove him? What did he want out of life? Had he put the past behind him? How did he feel about the boys who came to the ranch? Did he see himself in each one? Where were the people who’d abused him? Did he have any contact with them? Was his work enough to fulfill him? Or was he seeing someone?
Maybe he was dating around...
Cora was also curious to learn how he’d gotten that scar on his face—but equally afraid to find out. What she’d read about him scared her. She didn’t want to imagine him going through any more pain and suffering than what she’d been forced to imagine when she’d read that article about him. She wondered if other people had the same reaction—if they shied away from him for fear they might have to walk into that darkness.
Movement behind him caught her eye, and she realized that he wasn’t alone. He had three boys with him. It looked as though he was taking some New Horizons students out for a ride...
She glanced into her backseat. She had her camera, had brought it to take some pictures of Silver Springs she could send to Jill and her family. She still planned to do that, but her fingers itched to take a few shots of him and those boys first. She’d never seen a man sit so comfortably in the saddle as Elijah. And she loved the way he kept looking back at the boys, like a mother hen checking her chicks.
This wasn’t about admiring Aiyana’s adopted son so much as it was about the symbolism she saw here, she told herself as she cut the engine. He represented a man who’d not only survived tremendous difficulty but risen above it. Someone who’d conquered his demons. And now he was helping others battle theirs. There was a great deal of artistic beauty in that, and she had to capture it.
She couldn’t get a clear shot from the roadside, however. There were too many trees in between.
After hiking down the embankment, she wove through the forest to get close enough. Luckily for her, or she never would’ve caught up with them, Elijah and the boys had stopped and were laughing and talking while drinking from a canteen Eli passed around.
She fastened her heavy telephoto lens to the expensive camera her parents had given her for Christmas last year and clicked away, using a fast shutter speed so that the pictures wouldn’t turn out blurry. In one picture, she captured Elijah laughing. She’d never seen him smile, not so easily. He was in his element out here, and he cared about the boys he was with. Those two things were readily apparent; she could see it in both his body language and his expression.
Cora was disappointed when he put the lid on the canteen, slung it over his body, where he’d been carrying it before, and charged up the next hill, making it impossible for her to get any more pictures of him.
As the boys whooped and hollered in their efforts to keep up with him, she hiked back to her car. They were having a blast. She could easily imagine any problem they had disappearing while they were out enjoying the beautiful scenery and the equally beautiful weather.
Witnessing the impact Elijah was having on the students at the ranch—by taking enough interest to guide them on a ride even during their “off” period—inspired her. He was embracing the spirit of his job. Like Aiyana, he was doing it for the right reasons. And so could she. She had a lot of love to give. Who needed it more than abused, neglected and angry teens?
How are you doing today?
Her father’s text came in just before Cora started her car. Better, she wrote.
Because...
Because coming here was no longer only about her. I feel like I could make a real difference with this job.
That’s the spirit!
Cora responded by sending a smiley face, put her phone down and headed into town, where she took quite a few pictures. It was a great way to investigate her new surroundings. Those were the ones she posted on Instagram and sent to family and friends who were eager to see where she’d moved. But it was the photographs of Elijah and the three boys that she downloaded onto her computer when she returned that night. She spent over an hour experimenting with different filters and other bells and whistles on Photoshop. In her favorite photograph, one where Elijah was smiling at the boy to his left, the lighting was perfect as it came through the branches of the trees.
She could win a contest with that shot...
“Hail to the conquering hero,” she muttered before she set her computer aside and turned off the light so that she could get some sleep.
Chapter Five (#u4a109276-5926-5904-9501-3b08d95e8f05)
Over the next few days, Cora put her classroom in order by making sure the large, commercial-sized kiln and sixteen throwing wheels in the pottery room were clean and in good repair. She also took stock of the clay and other supplies. The teacher before her had done a respectable job caring for the equipment and maintaining the necessary inventory, so it wasn’t too overwhelming of a job. She obtained permission to order some glazes she’d been hoping to get, as well as a new set of colored pencils and paintbrushes for each student, so she’d at least have the supplies needed to start the year off right.
By the end of the week, Cora was feeling pretty encouraged about beginning school on Monday. She’d been running into more and more students as the boys returned to the ranch and was looking forward to meeting the rest. Other than texting and calling her old friends and her brother, who promised to come out and see her soon, she’d had virtually no social life since she arrived, so she figured more distraction, work and activity would help fill that gap. The neighbor opposite to Sean Travers, Doug Maggleby, a math teacher at the school, chatted with her whenever he caught her out and about. But she’d started to avoid him, where possible. The more he talked, the more uncomfortable he made her. He liked to rave about politics, and she rarely agreed with his opinion. He’d also mentioned taking her to the movies even though he was clearly too old for her. She wasn’t looking forward to having to say no, but knew that was coming. So instead of visiting with him in the evenings like she had the first few nights, she’d sneak out of her bungalow and walk down to the pond to watch the sunset or stop by the horses’ pen to say good-night. If Mr. Maggleby happened to be in his yard working in his fall garden, however, she’d settle for having a glass of wine in her cottage and reading a book or going over her lesson plans.
She’d seen very little of Elijah since taking those photographs of him horseback riding with the boys. Although she wasn’t pleased by the fact, she’d developed a habit of looking for him whenever she was out. Occasionally, she’d spot him at a distance and couldn’t help admiring what she saw. But he seemed extra busy getting the ranch ready for the fall semester, so she was fairly certain she was the last thing on his mind.
Aiyana had been especially busy, too. Since Betty May had handled the purchase requisition for the art supplies, Cora had had no interaction with her birth mother—not until Friday afternoon. She was in the cafeteria between lunch and dinner, nibbling on a chocolate chip cookie while she finished reading the orientation materials she’d been given, when Aiyana came in, poured herself a cup of coffee and walked over to join Cora.
“Hello.” Instantly self-conscious, Cora closed the manual as her “boss” sat down.
“How are you holding up, dear?” Aiyana asked.
“Good.” She cleared her throat. “Great.”
“I’m relieved to hear it—and glad to find you here. This time of year is so crazy for me. I apologize that I haven’t had the chance to check on you. Did you get the supplies you requested?”
“Not yet. But last I heard they’ve been ordered, so they should arrive soon. Thanks for giving the okay on that.”
She took a drink of her coffee. “I told you how I feel about art. That isn’t where I choose to skimp.”
“I have to admit your attitude is refreshing. I’m not used to art being much of a priority.”
“The practicalities of running a school can often get in the way of even the best intentions,” she said. “Fortunately, right now, we’ve got some wealthy benefactors who are giving us the support we need.” She winked. “Makes a difference when we have a fair number of students with rich—and sometimes famous—parents.”
“Are we talking movie stars?” Cora hadn’t considered that possibility, but she supposed, since they weren’t far from LA, it was logical.
“A few. Others are the children of producers and movie execs, attorneys, doctors, that sort of thing.”
“Are the wealthy kids ones who are typically loved, or...”
Her lips curved into a rueful smile. “Oh, they’re loved, just a little more generously than would probably be best. From what I’ve seen, being given too much can be as difficult as being given too little.”
“Doesn’t that create quite a disparity? I mean...you mentioned taking in orphans who have no one to support them.”
“We have some of the richest and some of the poorest students in the state. But we make it clear from the beginning that everyone is on an equal footing here at the ranch. There is no favoritism, no bending of the rules because of who their parents are.”
“I can’t imagine that goes over very well—not for people who are used to receiving preferential treatment.”
“I’ve lost several students over that policy,” she admitted. “All parents agree to it when they enroll their child—but can change their minds once they want or need special treatment.” She pushed a strand of loose hair out of her face. “Regardless, I won’t bend. To me it’s a matter of integrity. And, if a parent will stand behind me, their son usually settles down and begins to learn the lessons they were hoping we’d teach him.”
Cora swallowed another bite of her cookie. “How does that play out in a social setting—for the kids, I mean?”
Aiyana took another sip of coffee. “Depends. We take a hard line on bullying, too—watch carefully for it. Most get the message early on that the rules are firmer here, but fair to all, and life falls into a sustainable rhythm. I don’t think we’re too terribly different from other high schools—all schools have some behavioral problems.”
“But you’ve taken on the behavioral problems other schools can no longer cope with. Doesn’t that ever make you feel...intimidated?”
“I wouldn’t want to go back and start over—I can tell you that,” she said with a mirthless chuckle. “But now that we’re up and running, and I’ve got the momentum that comes from doing this for so long, it’s easier than it was. Still, I couldn’t continue without the community support I’ve received, not to mention the devoted teachers we have here—and Elijah, who has such a knack for communicating with these boys. Even if I can’t get one to behave, he usually can.”
Cora pictured Aiyana’s son on top of that horse. “Elijah’s your secret weapon.”
“Absolutely.”
She studied Aiyana’s face. Her mother was so pretty despite the lines that were beginning to appear around her eyes and mouth and the ribbons of gray in her hair. “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but...”
“Ask me anything,” she said.
“I was wondering what nationality you are.”
She seemed surprised by the question—that Cora would have any interest in that—but not put off. “My mother is a Nicaraguan immigrant. My father was a white farmhand in the Central Valley.”
“Are they still alive?”
“They are. But my mother is no longer with my father. He was an abusive man, so I don’t have any contact with him, either. For many years now she’s been with the farmer who employed them both and has been so much happier. What about you? What nationality are you?”
Cora thought it might be too coincidental if she were to say she was part Nicaraguan, but that was good to know—filled in one of the many blanks in her life. Aiyana had said her father was white; from her skin tone, Cora assumed hers was, too. “I’m a mix, I think.”
“And your parents? Where are they?”
“In LA. My father’s a financial planner. My mother’s sort of a...socialite.”
She smiled at that. “Do you have siblings?”
“An older brother who’s larger than life and terribly handsome. Like a lot of people in LA, he’s a movie producer. What about you?”
“I have one older brother and two younger brothers, but I don’t see my younger brothers very often.”
She seemed noticeably saddened by that. “They don’t live close?”
“My brothers are all over California. One owns a winery in Napa. One is in banking in San Francisco. The oldest runs the farm for my mom and stepdad in Los Banos, where I grew up.”
“Are they all married?”
“Yes. With kids. What about your brother?”
Suppressing her curiosity about why Aiyana had never married, Cora answered the question. “Still playing the field.”
“Sounds like my sons.”
“Where are they all? I mean, besides Eli, of course.”
“Gavin, my second oldest, has a house in town but works here. He’s a handyman, can fix anything.”
“Really?” Cora had been around for five days, yet she couldn’t recall ever seeing a handyman. “Was he at the meeting on Monday?”
“No. He’s not someone who likes to get involved in the administration aspect of the ranch. He prefers to remain in the background, which is why he lives in town.”
“How old is he?”
“Twenty-eight. I adopted him three years after I adopted Elijah. Then there’s Dallas. He’s twenty-five and a mountain climber, so he’s usually off, traveling to remote destinations all over the world. I don’t get to see him much.” She seemed to regret that but moved on. “Seth is twenty-three. He recently graduated from UC Berkeley, wants to be a sculptor. That’s one of the reasons I love art so much,” she confided. “I’m not sure what I would’ve done with him if I hadn’t been able to reach him in that way...”
“He has...emotional issues?”
“Anger issues, mostly. I seem to gravitate to the most damaged of the boys. I can’t help trying to make them whole.”
Did Aiyana always accomplish that? Or were some of her sons too damaged? “Let’s see—Elijah, Gavin, Dallas and Seth. That’s four sons, but I heard you have eight,” Cora said. “What about the others?”
“Ryan and Taylor are twins. Well, they’re not actually related, but we call them twins because they’re the same age and have done just about everything together since they met here at the ranch. They’re still in college. Ryan wants to be a planetary scientist, and Taylor has set his sights on becoming a theoretical physicist. They’re both too brilliant for their own good,” she added. “Now that they’re actually applying themselves.”
“Where do they go to school?”
“MIT. Then I have Liam and Bentley, who go here. Liam’s a senior. Bentley’s a sophomore.”
“I wonder if I’ve seen either one of them around.”
“Not yet. They’ve been with Dallas at Yosemite the past ten days. He’s teaching them how to climb.”
“That’s nice of him.”
“They live to spend time with their older brothers.” She lowered her voice. “He better not let them get hurt, though.”
“It’s a scary sport.” Cora dusted the cookie crumbs off her “boyfriend” jeans. “Would you ever consider adopting more?”
Finished with her coffee, Aiyana pushed the cup aside. “I keep telling myself I need to stop. But every couple of years, it seems as if there’s at least one more I’m dying to take home with me.”
“That means...maybe?”
“I guess. It’ll depend on the circumstances.”
So she would take in another boy if she felt he needed her that much, Cora decided. “Did you always want a big family?” she asked and then held her breath. She thought this might be the most revealing question yet, that it might give her some clue as to why Aiyana hadn’t wanted her, but Aiyana’s face grew shuttered as she shook her head.
“No. Never thought I’d have any kids.”
Cora was dying to ask why, but there was something so forbidding in the sudden change in Aiyana’s expression and body language that she could tell it would be too intrusive. Aiyana had essentially slammed the door shut on that subject, and she didn’t stick around long enough to give Cora much of a chance to talk about anything else.
“I’d better go.” She reclaimed her empty cup as she stood. “It’s been wonderful having a chance to chat, but I’ve got a lot to do before the pizza party tonight. You’re coming, right?”
Cora had found a flyer taped to her door when she got back to her cottage last night announcing a Kickoff Party for all the teachers at a place called Moonstruck Pizza in town. “I haven’t made up my mind, to be honest.”
“Oh, don’t miss it,” she said. “The entire staff gets together the Friday before school starts to celebrate the end of summer and the beginning of a new year. It’s a tradition.”
“And the students? They stay on campus?”
“Yes. The floor monitors keep an eye on them. So come to the party. It’ll give everyone a chance to get to know you. And there’ll be plenty of pizza and beer—and karaoke, if you sing.”
“I sing a little,” Cora said, but that was an understatement. She sang a lot. She and a handful of friends liked to compete in various local contests, enjoyed standing behind a mic. And she really needed to get out and have some fun. She just hoped Doug Maggleby wouldn’t be too determined to monopolize her time. She could easily imagine spending the evening trying to dodge him.
“So you’ll be there?” Aiyana seemed eager for her company.
At that point, Cora didn’t feel as if she could refuse—not if it might afford her a few minutes more with her birth mother. “Sure. Why not?” she said, but as soon as she agreed, she began to wonder if Elijah would be part of the festivities. Then she chided herself for having the desire to see him. She was letting herself get quite a “thing” for Aiyana’s handsome son, even though she barely knew him and he’d made it clear he wasn’t interested in her.
* * *
He was there. Cora spotted Elijah as soon as she walked into the pizza parlor and hated herself for suddenly being so glad she’d come. She didn’t need to get her heart broken; she was trying to mend it by moving here, to finally get over the sense of rejection her adoption had engendered.
But she figured she shouldn’t be too hard on herself. She didn’t yet know anyone other than the staff she’d been introduced to at the school, so it wasn’t all that surprising she’d fixate on the one man she’d met who was in her age bracket—especially when she factored in how darned handsome he was.
She couldn’t get hurt if he never responded, anyway. His disinterest made the attraction safe. So she figured she might as well enjoy the view he provided, maybe even indulge in a few harmless fantasies. If allowing him to fuel her imagination helped pass the time and made her stint in Silver Springs more enjoyable, why not?
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Brenda Novak
Тип: электронная книга
Жанр: Современные любовные романы
Язык: на английском языке
Издательство: HarperCollins
Дата публикации: 16.04.2024
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О книге: New York Times bestselling author Brenda Novak welcomes readers to the town of Silver Springs, where surprises wait around every corner!The search for her birth mother brought Cora Kelly to the New Horizons Boys Ranch. Getting a job there was easy enough, but confiding in Aiyana, the ranch’s owner, that she′s really her daughter? Cora′s not sure she can do that, not unless she′s confident the news will be welcomed. And once she gets to know Elijah Turner—Aiyana′s adopted son and ranch manager—that decision becomes even more difficult.Although Elijah can’t deny his deep attraction to Cora, he′s always struggled with trust. Anyone with his past would, and there′s something about the ranch’s newest employee that isn′t exactly as it seems. But if the feelings she awakes in his guarded heart are any indication, she might be just what he’s long been waiting for.