The Colorado Kid
Vicki Lewis Thompson
The RancherSmart, sexy, and very, very conservative, Sebastian Daniels prides himself on always doing the right thing. So why didn't he know he had a child?His WomanSpunky Matty Lang has been hopelessly, secretly, in love with Sebastian for years. Now, thanks to little Elizabeth, it's not a secret any longer…His Baby…?Matty can't believe it–Sebastian's found a baby on his doorstep! And worse, now Sebastian thinks the little buckaroo is his. He's even thinking about marrying the child's absentee mother! There's only one thing to do–seduce Sebastian absolutely senseless! Because no baby girl is going to stop Matty from getting her man…
“I want to be inside you, Matty,” Sebastian pleaded
He didn’t care that he sounded desperate. He was desperate. “Please get the—”
“Yes,” Matty murmured, taking a condom from the drawer.
“Now, Matty,” he said hoarsely, battling for control as she put the condom on. Then the mattress shifted and she rested her hands on his shoulders. He opened his eyes and looked up into hers. Bracketing her waist with both hands, he held her gaze as he guided her down. Her eyes were luminous. He knew he’d never forget the way they looked at this moment.
Easy. Slow. There. He drew in a sharp breath. So good. He couldn’t imagine it getting any better than this. “Ride me, Matty,” he whispered urgently.
Lips parted, eyes bright, she did just that, giving him the trip of his life. There was no holding back. Stunned by the impact, he couldn’t hear anything beyond the pounding of his heart. Then a high-pitched noise penetrated the haze surrounding him. It sounded like a baby’s cry. His baby.
Dear Reader,
As much as I adore cowboys, I also love torturing the sexy rascals. In my new miniseries, THREE COWBOYS & A BABY, each of them thinks he’s the father of the same darling baby girl, which makes for some very tense moments. Cowboys. They’re so cute when they’re angry.
First up is Sebastian Daniels. Sebastian has a tough time adjusting to the idea that the bundle of joy left on his doorstep might be his bundle of joy. But once he latches on to the concept, he won’t be denied. Unfortunately for him, his good buddy Travis Evans stakes a claim to the baby in Two in the Saddle, available in May. In Boone’s Bounty, a June release, Sebastian’s loyal friend Boone Connor insists the little girl definitely belongs to him. Three men. One baby. Could it get any more complicated?
Yes. Because there’s a fourth cowboy—Nat Grady. For the thrilling conclusion of this miniseries, I’m stepping out of Temptation and into the realm of Single Titles. Don’t miss That’s My Baby! in September.
Warmly,
Vicki Lewis Thompson
The Colorado Kid
Vicki Lewis Thompson
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
To Roz Denny Fox,
for her unselfish support and friendship.
Thanks, Roz.
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
1
“COME ON, SEBASTIAN, HONEY.” Charlotte eased back from his kiss and reached for the zipper of his fly. “Show little ol’ Charlotte what’s inside those Wranglers.”
Sebastian grabbed her hand and moved it aside. Damned if he liked having a woman set the pace. Besides, it’d been a long time, and he couldn’t have her fumbling around when he wasn’t sure how good his control would be. “We’ll get to that,” he muttered.
“How sweet.” She nibbled at his bottom lip as she flicked open a snap on his western shirt. “You’re shy. I never would’ve guessed you’d be shy after being married to Barbara.” She popped another snap open. “Is that why you cooked me that special dinner, served us wine and built a fire in the fireplace, so you’d get over being nervous?”
His jaw clenched. “I’m not nervous. I just like to—”
“Me, too, honey.” She ripped the rest of the buttons open and plunged her tongue halfway down his throat.
Hell, he was getting worked up, and he’d just figured out he didn’t like Charlotte all that much. He believed you should at least like a woman you intended to take to bed. He’d liked her okay every time he’d seen her behind her desk at Colorado Savings and Loan. And spring was coming on, the season of the year he always felt the most like planting…something. In another month he’d be thirty-five years old and he could feel time passing. But maybe inviting Charlotte out to the ranch had been a bad idea.
She moaned and shoved her D-cups against his chest. “Undress me,” she whispered before delving into his mouth again. The woman had a tongue like a backhoe. But those D-cups did tempt him. They were two of the items that had caught his interest in the first place. And as his friends had been telling him, he had to start somewhere if he expected to get back in the hunt.
Still, if it’d been left up to him, he probably wouldn’t have moved the evening along quite this fast. It didn’t seem to be up to him, however, and if he didn’t do something manly soon she’d be insulted. He unfastened the delicate top button of her blouse, pleased that he hadn’t lost the technique.
With the way her chest was heaving, he needed all the technique he could remember to unbutton her blouse and unfasten the front latch on her bra. He’d had easier times taking the bucking strap off a bronc. But at last he had clear access, and he had to admit she filled a man’s hands to overflowing. Too bad her perfume nearly made him choke.
But he could deal with that. Would deal with that. Because now his jeans were uncomfortably tight, and Charlotte seemed only too eager to help him with his problem. Besides, he’d invited her out to join him for dinner with this sort of activity in the back of his mind. He’d even made Fleafarm bed down in the barn so the dog wouldn’t be underfoot.
He’d served dinner by candlelight, and afterward, when she’d suggested they leave the lights off and sit by the fire for a while with their wine, he’d made no objection. She could rightly accuse him of being a tease if he didn’t follow through. Maybe he’d discover he liked her better as they went along. And he had to start somewhere.
JESSICA FELT as if she’d driven over half the state of Colorado trying to make sure nobody had followed her jam-packed Subaru out of Aspen. Or maybe she’d been putting off the moment that had to come.
It was close now. She’d picked up a cup of coffee at a convenience mart in Canon City. Then she’d pushed on to the little town of Huerfano. A few miles beyond Huerfano the pavement ended, signaling that she was nearly there.
Sebastian had asked her to visit the Rocking D a hundred times, but she’d never found the time. Then she’d become pregnant and a visit would have raised questions she’d rather not answer yet. Now the Rocking D and Sebastian were her best hope for protecting Elizabeth, her sweet innocent child sleeping in a padded car seat amidst a jumble of belongings.
Jessica thought briefly of her parents, secure in their walled and gated estate on the Hudson River. Elizabeth would be protected there, as Jessica had been protected for the first twenty-four years of her life, although she wouldn’t truly call it a life. She wouldn’t wish that kind of stifling existence on anyone, let alone her own daughter.
When she left home three years ago, she’d felt confident she could blend into the woodwork and become an ordinary citizen as long as she had minimal contact with her parents and kept a low profile. But apparently someone had found out she was the Franklin heir. She’d had enough kidnapping escape drills as a kid to recognize that somebody had tried to snatch her. Because they’d tried to snatch her after work when Elizabeth was home with a nanny, Jessica figured they must not know about the baby. And she wanted it to stay that way.
For the past few days she’d put blinders on her emotions, focusing on the next steps, trying to turn the nightmare into the sort of interesting science experiment that would have challenged her in college. She’d bought several wigs to cover her red hair then traded her royal blue car in for the nondescript gray Subaru. Mechanically she’d packed, leaving in the middle of the night hoping that no one would see her. And for three days, she’d been gradually switching Elizabeth to formula.
The moon picked out fragments of ice in the dirt road, making them glitter like broken glass. Patches of snow gleamed in open areas between stands of juniper. Thank God the weather was still cold enough that the road was frozen instead of muddy. Getting stuck out here would be disastrous.
And thank God Sebastian was home tonight. She’d called earlier from Canon City, pretending to be a carpet-cleaning service when he’d answered. His strong, gentle voice, sounding slightly impatient over the unwanted sales call but still kind, had brought tears to her eyes. He was such a good friend. How she longed to pour out the whole horrible story and run to him for comfort and advice. But she couldn’t risk it.
She drove slowly, searching the road on her right for the ranch entrance. When it rose up out of the darkness—two sturdy poles braced by a third across the top—a dagger of pain sliced past her defenses and left her gasping. She stopped the car and gripped the wheel until she was in control of herself again.
Behind her, Elizabeth whimpered softly in her sleep.
The soft, vulnerable sound nearly destroyed her, but it was the one sound she needed to hear. Swallowing a sob of anguish, she turned down the road leading to the ranch.
SEBASTIAN WANTED to move the whole program from the leather sofa, where Charlotte was lying half-naked, to the bedroom, where he’d have space to stretch his legs during the proceedings and the surface wouldn’t be so damned slippery. Besides, he’d stashed a couple of condoms in the drawer of his bedside table, figuring that was the logical place for them if and when they needed to be deployed. He hadn’t counted on Charlotte seducing him in the living room.
Now she seemed too involved to welcome a change of scenery, and he didn’t think he could carry her without risk of damage to both of them.
He levered himself away from her. “Charlotte, I need—”
“You need me, honey!” She grabbed his belt buckle and pulled him back down.
“Yeah, but first I have to get—”
“Undressed.” She had his buckle open in record time. She must have worked on belt buckles a time or two before this.
“Birth control,” he said around her eager kisses. He was off-balance and couldn’t stop her from tugging down his zipper without falling flat onto her.
“I have that covered.” She reached inside his jeans. “Don’t you worry about a thing.”
He closed his eyes and tried to tell himself that he trusted her to take care of that detail. But he didn’t. With a groan he pulled away from her again. “I’m getting the condoms.”
“I’ll have you know I have no communicable diseases!” She grabbed his arm as he struggled off the sofa.
“Maybe I do,” he said.
“Ha.” She redoubled her efforts to pull him back to her. “You’ve lived like a monk since Barbara left.”
“Says who?” He wrestled his way out of her arms.
“Everybody in Fremont County, that’s who.” Panting, she gazed up at him. “Come on, now. It’ll feel so good without one of those little raincoats on.”
It would. It most certainly would. But as much as he relished the idea, he wouldn’t let himself succumb. “I don’t believe in taking chances,” he said.
And he never had, not in that way. He’d risked his neck a million times, but when it came to making babies, he was old-fashioned enough to believe that the father of the baby should be married to the mother. With luck they’d also be madly in love.
Charlotte gazed at him, her eyes hot. “Better hurry then, sugar. My motor’s running.” She glanced at his erection. “And I do believe the gearshift works.”
He couldn’t help smiling. Maybe this would be fun, after all, although the frantic pace didn’t suit him. “Guess it does.” He eased his zipper back up so his pants wouldn’t fall down as he started into the bedroom. “I’ll be right—”
The doorbell chimed.
He turned, hardly believing he’d heard the sound. This time of year he was alone on the ranch. Folks didn’t just drop by unannounced at nine-thirty on a Friday night unless something was wrong.
Immediately he thought of his neighbor Matty. Oh, God. What if something had happened over at the Leaning L? Matty lived alone, too, a fact that often worried him. He couldn’t say that to Matty, though. A more fiercely independent woman he’d never known.
He turned to Charlotte, who looked extremely put out with the interruption. He shrugged in apology. “Listen, could you go into the bedroom while I see who this is? It could be an emergency or something.”
“Damn well better be an emergency,” Charlotte muttered as she gathered her blouse together and climbed from the sofa. “Oh, well. I’ll go make myself comfortable in your beddie-bye.”
Sebastian snapped his shirt buttons and tucked the tails into his jeans. Then he buckled his belt. He hoped Matty wasn’t at the door, what with Charlotte lying naked in his bed. If Matty found out, she probably wouldn’t mind. She’d probably laugh about it. But it would embarrass the hell out of him.
Checking to make sure Charlotte was safely out of sight in the bedroom, he walked through semi-darkness to the front door. He’d pulled the drapes across the windows facing the porch, both for privacy and to keep the heat in on this cold March night.
When he opened the front door, he was nearly blinded by high beams trained right on the porch. Clouds of exhaust from the vehicle billowed in the cold night air. He threw up an arm, trying to shade his eyes. “Who’s there?”
The idiot driver laid on the horn.
“Hey!” He started out the door. If this was somebody’s idea of a joke, he didn’t appreciate it. “What the hell are you—”
He stopped abruptly as he heard a wail. A baby’s wail.
Right by his feet.
He looked down and damned if there wasn’t one of those baby carriers by the door. And damned if the wailing wasn’t coming from a real live kid!
As he stood there, too stunned to react, the headlight beams shifted, arcing across the porch as the driver swung the vehicle around.
Sebastian charged down the porch steps. “Hold on! You can’t leave a baby here like some stray dog! Come back, damn your hide! How’m I supposed to know what to do with a damned baby?” He ran a fruitless few yards, memorizing the license plate before he gave up and headed back to the porch, where the baby was still crying.
He let loose a string of oaths, his breath frosting the air as he stomped up the steps. If this didn’t take the cake. Sure, he’d had the usual puppies and kittens dropped at his place. City folks seemed to think a ranch was like the local Humane Society, the perfect place to leave unwanted pets. But a baby! He couldn’t get his mind around the concept.
At least he had noted the license plate of the car. Not that anyone who would do such a thing deserved to have the kid back. He’d like to see them prosecuted, though, and that was reason enough to see they were tracked down. For the time being, he’d better get this little bundle into the house where it was warm.
He started to reach for the infant seat, and in the soft glow of the porch light noticed a note was pinned to the baby’s blanket.
“Sebastian?” Charlotte, barefoot and wearing only his bathrobe, approached the open front door. “Do I hear a baby out there?”
Sebastian picked up the red-faced, crying infant in its carrier and walked into the house. “Somebody dropped it off,” he said, disbelief lacing his words. “Just drove up here, unloaded the kid and took off.”
Charlotte backed up, a wary look on her face. “Why would they do a thing like that?”
“How should I know?” He shoved the door closed with one booted foot and switched on the overhead light by the front door with his elbow. “There’s a note.”
“I hate crying babies,” Charlotte said.
“You’d cry, too, if somebody just left you on the porch.” Sebastian leaned closer to read the slip of paper and his breath caught. This was no random drop-off. The note was specifically addressed to him. His gaze cut to the signature. Jessica. He hadn’t seen her in months, not since his birthday last year. Eleven months ago. His heart rate skyrocketed and cold sweat trickled down his spine. He peered at the little red face, but he was no judge of how old a baby was.
“What does the note say?” Charlotte asked.
Sebastian was afraid to read it. God, he’d been drunk that night. They’d all been drunker than skunks—him, Travis and Boone. But not Jessica. She’d good-naturedly driven them back to their rented cabin near the ski lodge, given them all vitamins to ward off a hangover and pushed them toward their individual beds. They’d flirted with her outrageously. He remembered pulling her down to the bed as she tucked him in, teasing her for a kiss….
“Sebastian, you’re driving me nuts! What does the blasted note say?”
With the baby still crying, he forced himself to read it.
Dear Sebastian,
I’m counting on you to be a godfather to my little Elizabeth until I can return for her. Your generosity and kindness are exactly what she needs right now. Believe me, dear friend, I wouldn’t do this if I weren’t in desperate circumstances. Please don’t contact the authorities. It’s best if no one knows where Elizabeth is.
In deepest gratitude,
Jessica
A godfather. She didn’t say he was the father, only that she wanted him to be a godfather to this little baby. Maybe this kid was older than she looked. But the fact remained that Jessica was in trouble, and she’d delivered her baby to his doorstep. That was pretty damned incriminating.
“Well?” Charlotte’s impatience was obvious.
He glanced at her. “Know anything about babies?”
She held up a hand and backed up a couple more steps. “Not a thing, sugar, except how you make one.” She tilted her head toward the wailing child. “Did you make this one?”
“I don’t know. I don’t remember.”
“Oh, yeah, that’s what they all say. Funny how amnesia strikes when a guy faces a moment like this.”
That did it. He really didn’t like Charlotte. “Well, whether I am or not, I have to make her stop crying.” He carried the infant seat over to the sofa and set it down.
“Her?”
“Her name’s Elizabeth.” He worked at the straps holding the baby in and finally got them undone. Then he paused, realizing that didn’t solve anything because he didn’t know what to do next. He should probably pick her up, but he was afraid to. She was so small, and so red in the face. He leaned toward her. “Don’t cry, Elizabeth, honey. Don’t cry, okay?”
Elizabeth didn’t seem to understand. She opened her mouth wide and cried louder. Nothing wrong with her lungs, at least.
“I’m getting dressed and skedaddling out of here.” Charlotte headed toward the bedroom. “I can’t take this.”
“Wait!” Panic rose in him. “You can’t leave me alone with her!”
Charlotte turned back to him. “Look, I’m no good with babies. Never wanted any and never learned what to do with them. I suggest you call somebody who knows what they’re doing. Or drive her in to see Doc Harrison in Huerfano.”
“I can’t—” He started to say he couldn’t tell anybody about the baby yet, until he’d figured out if he was the father. But that was ridiculous. He had to find someone to help him take care of her, and fast. “Look, you’re a woman. You must be better at this than me. At least show me how to pick her up. I’ve never held a kid this young.”
“That makes two of us, bud. You’d better call somebody. I’m getting dressed.” With that she whirled and went into the bedroom.
About the only bright spot Sebastian could see in the situation was that he hadn’t made love to Charlotte, a woman he really, really didn’t like. Otherwise, he couldn’t remember being this confused, clumsy and uncertain in his life, except maybe the time he faced the row of girls lined up on the far side of the gym at the eighth-grade social. He didn’t think he should even touch this baby without washing his hands first. He might be carrying some deadly germ.
So he patted her where the blanket covered her up, but his pats seemed to have no effect. She was getting very red in the face. He couldn’t see her eyes because they were squeezed shut. Her head was covered with some knit thing that reminded him of the cover on a golf club, and her hands, the tiniest hands he’d ever seen in his life, were clenched and waving in the air.
Charlotte reappeared, tugging on her wool coat. As she buttoned it, she gazed at him and shook her head. Finally she sighed and stomped into the kitchen.
Hope surged through him. She was going to get something, do something, work some feminine magic to make this crying stop. Her instincts had finally kicked in, providing her with the mothering abilities that all woman carried in their genes. Maybe he’d been wrong to judge her so harshly.
She reappeared and thrust the cordless phone at him. “Here. Call somebody.” Then she grabbed her purse and went out the front door, closing it firmly behind her.
Sebastian stared at the phone and finally punched in the one number he knew by heart.
FIVE YEARS AGO Matty Lang had thought of herself as a young widow. Twenty-seven wasn’t old. Friends and family had assured her she’d find a good man, have kids, continue along life’s path in a normal progression. Matty loved normal progressions, which was why she felt so much satisfaction sitting at her floor loom watching the design grow. Usually.
But not on a Friday night, when she knew damn well that Charlotte Crabtree from the bank was up at the Rocking D having dinner alone with Sebastian, while Matty, now thirty-two and no longer feeling so frigging young anymore, sat throwing a shuttle back and forth and swearing under her breath.
Sebastian would never think to invite her to dinner. Oh, no. Not good old Matty, who could ride as well as he could, and rope nearly as well. Matty sometimes wondered if he even remembered she was a woman. She, on the other hand, had never managed to forget he was a man. She’d been trying ever since the day she’d met Sebastian Daniels, the day she and Butch had moved to the Leaning L and had been welcomed by their closest neighbors Barbara and Sebastian, owners of the Rocking D.
She remembered thinking that a young bride had no business looking at another man the way she found herself looking at Sebastian. And for years she’d forced herself to ignore his considerable sex appeal—mostly. Then Butch had died, and once she’d worked through her grief, ignoring Sebastian became even tougher, especially when she could tell he and Barbara weren’t getting along. After Barbara left, Matty had allowed herself to begin daydreaming, just a little.
Fat lot of good that had done her. Two years after his divorce, Sebastian still treated her exactly the way he always had, like one of the boys. Matty threw the shuttle impatiently as a picture of Charlotte Crabtree wiggled through her mind. Charlotte would never be mistaken for one of the boys.
Oh, how Charlotte had loved bragging to anyone within hearing distance about her big date with Sebastian. Matty had been so sick of listening to Charlotte this afternoon that she’d almost left without making her deposit.
Matty knew Sebastian would serve his own personal specialty—coq au vin. He used to make it for the four of them when Barbara and Butch were still around. He’d probably built a fire in the fireplace and lit some candles. Matty ground her teeth. And wine. Sebastian liked a good wine with dinner. They’d be finished by now, though, and then—what might happen after dinner didn’t bear thinking about. So she wouldn’t.
But she did think about it. Maybe she’d have to switch banks. It would be worth it to drive all the way into Canon City just so she didn’t have to lay eyes on Charlotte Crabtree and her smug smile. Yes, that was what she’d do. She’d move her account to Canon City on Monday and find a bank that was offering free stuff for opening an account. Maybe she could get herself a new toaster oven or a set of dishes out of the deal. Or one of those bitty color television sets. She’d always wanted—
The ringing phone made her jump and she knocked over her bench. It landed with a clatter on the hardwood floor, startling Sadie, her Great Dane, out of her snooze near the loom. Nobody called at this hour on a Friday night unless it was an emergency. Heart pounding, Matty hurried into the kitchen. As she picked up the phone, she prayed it was a prank or a wrong number, and not some family disaster.
“Matty?” Sebastian sounded frantic.
Matty frowned. Unless she was mistaken, that was a baby crying in the background. She couldn’t put that together with Charlotte Crabtree and the dinner date, but yes, there was definitely a very young baby close to the phone. “What’s going on?”
“It’s…complicated. Can you come over?”
Not while Charlotte was still there, she wouldn’t. “Why?”
“Because I need you to help me.”
“With what?”
“I’ll explain when you get here. Please, Matty. Come quick.”
“Is Charlotte still there?”
“How did you know about Charlotte?”
“Sebastian, everybody with an account at Colorado Savings knows Charlotte came up to your place for dinner. Is she still there?”
“No. Can you come over?”
So Charlotte had left and a tiny baby was there instead. Matty was burning up with curiosity. Wild horses couldn’t have kept her off the Rocking D tonight. “I’ll be right there,” she said.
2
NO UNFAMILIAR VEHICLES sat in the circular drive in front of Sebastian’s place, but Matty noticed two large cardboard boxes next to the front door when she climbed the steps to his porch. And sure enough, a baby was crying inside the house. As near as she could remember, there had never been a baby at the Rocking D, even though folks around here thought the ranch’s brand looked a lot like a cradle.
She pounded on the front door, figuring she’d better make a lot of racket to be heard above the screaming baby.
The door opened almost immediately and Sebastian stood there looking frazzled. It was a novel sight. Matty couldn’t remember seeing him frazzled before. The notion that he even could get frazzled pleased her immensely.
He’d always been in charge of himself, his feet planted firmly on the ground, his broad shoulders ready to take any weight, his gray gaze steady and sure. Over the years, his self-reliance had both thrilled and maddened her. She found that sort of confidence sexy, but it didn’t leave much room for a woman to feel needed.
But tonight, he definitely needed someone, and she happened to be handy.
“Thank God you’re here.” He stepped back from the door. “You must have driven like a snail.”
“Actually, I broke the speed limit.” She imagined even five minutes would be an eternity with that caterwauling going on. She walked into the house, shucking her jacket as she went. “Where’s the kid?”
“Over there.” He gestured toward the sofa in front of the fire, where an infant seat held a squirming and very loud baby.
Matty had a thousand and one questions revolving around the sudden arrival of this baby at Sebastian’s house on a Friday night, but she decided there was no point in asking even one of them until they got the noise level down a bit. “What have you done for it?”
“Nothing. It’s a she. Elizabeth.”
“Nothing?” Matty crossed to the sofa, where the baby had tangled her blanket around herself as she flailed her little arms and legs. She had on some sort of one-piece pink suit and a pink hat, which was nearly off, plus the blanket. She looked hot.
“I was afraid I’d do the wrong thing,” he said. “I don’t know anything about babies. So I built up the fire.”
“I can see that.” The heat danced off Matty’s flannel shirt and jeans. She tried to ignore the pair of wineglasses on the coffee table and the distinct odor of Charlotte’s perfume that still stunk up the place. In between the baby ruckus came the soft sounds of some easy-listening country music on the CD player. Sebastian had fixed himself quite a little seduction pit.
“Where’s Charlotte?”
“Gone. She doesn’t know anything about babies.”
Well, that was something. The baby had driven Charlotte away. “I don’t know much, either,” Matty said. “But I think we should get her out of those clothes or away from the fire.”
“You pick her up, then, okay?”
Matty glanced at him and held back a smile. Finally, finally she’d found something that scared the hell out of big bad Sebastian Daniels. “Okay.” She hadn’t handled many babies, but she seemed to remember when they were this young you got one hand under their bottom and the other one under their head, because they were still sort of floppy.
This one was pretty rigid, though, probably from crying herself into a complete frenzy. Feeling awkward, Matty scooped her up and cradled her in her arms, rocking her gently. It felt like holding a noisy five-pound sack of potatoes. Matty didn’t know if her technique was any good, but the hysterical pitch of the cries softened, although the steady crying didn’t stop.
Matty carried the baby away from the fire. “Settle down, Elizabeth,” she instructed the baby. “Everything’s okay. No need to get worked up.” Matty had no idea if everything was okay or not, but the kid couldn’t understand her, anyway. She sat in the old maple rocker that had been around the Rocking D for as long as Matty could remember. Holding the baby in her lap, she took off the knit cap and began unzipping the fleece suit.
“What should I do?” Sebastian asked.
“She might be hungry.”
“Don’t look at me!”
Matty glanced up. “There’s no one else here to look at. Whose baby is this?”
He ran his fingers through his hair. “Um…we can discuss that later, after we get her settled down.”
Interesting answer. She noticed his hair was a tousled mess. Either he’d been shoving his fingers into it a lot, or someone else had. Matty didn’t want to think about that possibility, although she could understand the temptation. Sebastian had the kind of thick, dark brown hair that made women dream of burying their fingers in it.
“I don’t know how we’re going to get her settled down if you’re not prepared to feed her,” she said. “Did her mother leave you some formula or something?”
He looked stunned. “God, you would think she would have, and diapers and clothes, and stuff! Babies need stuff.”
“Sebastian, you’re going to have to tell me before my curiosity kills me dead. How in hell did you end up with this kid tonight?”
“She was left on the porch.”
Matty’s hands stilled and she stared at him. “You’re kidding.”
“No.”
“I thought that sort of thing only happened in books.” She was fascinated that Sebastian wouldn’t look her in the eye. He was usually a look-you-in-the-eye sort of guy. An up-front person. And then she figured out why he might be evading her gaze, and her stomach clutched. “Is she yours?” She prayed he’d say no.
He ran his fingers through his hair again. “It’s…possible.”
God, it hurt. She’d imagined all this time that she knew what was going on with him. If he hadn’t turned to her after Barbara left, she’d drawn comfort from the belief that he hadn’t turned to anyone else, either. His date with Charlotte tonight had been tough to accept, but at least she’d known it was a first date, and she’d secretly hoped it would be a disaster.
Now she had to face the fact that he’d had a relationship with someone months ago and might have fathered a child with her. Sebastian had always wanted kids. Matty knew that had been a bone of contention in his marriage to Barbara. Matty had wanted kids, too.
Once upon a time she’d dreamed…but Sebastian didn’t think of her that way, obviously. He’d found what he needed somewhere else.
She swallowed the bitter taste in her mouth, but her words came out with a sharp edge. “So who’s the mother and why isn’t she here?”
“She’s the woman who was with us during the avalanche two years ago in Aspen, and I don’t know why she’s not here. Apparently she’s in some kind of trouble and had to park Elizabeth for a while.”
Matty remembered the ski trip on Sebastian’s birthday, right after the divorce had become final. Matty had been prepared to help him celebrate both events, but Travis, Boone and Nat had lured him off for a stag weekend. When she’d seen the televised news of the avalanche, she’d fought hysteria until she’d finally learned no one had been hurt.
Then last year the guys had gone back to Aspen on his birthday again. Matty had thought they were all trying to prove they weren’t afraid of some big old avalanche, but maybe Sebastian had simply wanted to celebrate his birthday with this woman. Really celebrate. “Did you know about the baby?”
He looked at her in shock. “You think I’d let a woman who was pregnant with my baby go through the whole thing alone? Of course I didn’t know!”
“Of course you didn’t.” Twenty minutes ago she wouldn’t have even asked, but twenty minutes ago she hadn’t thought he’d been carrying on with a woman in Aspen, either.
“Listen, can you figure out what to do with her? That crying is tearing me apart.”
Matty could see no point in getting angry, but she did anyway. She was furious with this Aspen woman for running away after “parking” her baby. Sebastian’s baby. Matty would sacrifice ten years of her life for the chance to be the mother of Sebastian’s baby, and the injustice of this situation made her see red.
But somebody had to think clearly in this two-some, and Sebastian didn’t appear to be in any shape to do it. “I suggest you bring in the two boxes from the front porch,” she said. “My guess is that we’ll find supplies in there.”
“There were boxes out there?”
“Two of them.” She couldn’t believe how rattled he was. He wasn’t the most observant man in the world, but even he would usually notice two cardboard boxes left on his front porch.
He leaped to the task with obvious eagerness, as if some action, any action, was better than standing around stewing. While he carried them in, plopped them on the floor and ripped into them, Matty finished taking the fleece sleeper off the baby. Sebastian’s baby. Every time Matty thought about it, pain stabbed her chest.
Much as she probably ought to, she couldn’t leave the subject alone. “Did she actually say you were the father?”
“No. Her note just asked me to be Elizabeth’s godfather until she could come back for her.” He crouched beside the boxes, sorting through the contents. “Hey, everything’s in here. Formula, diapers, clothes. Even a book on taking care of babies. And there’s an envelope.” He tore it open and scanned the contents. “Instructions. Birth certificate. Medical records. Some sort of notarized thing giving me permission to have her treated if she gets sick.”
Matty’s tiny hope that the baby wasn’t his began to die. “Sounds as if she means for you to keep her for a while,” she said softly.
He didn’t acknowledge hearing her. “Okay, here’s what she says about feeding. The milk’s in cans, and she’s already sterilized some bottles and nipples, but she has instructions for how to do it when these run out.” Sebastian grabbed up a can and the package of sterilized bottles and nipples. “I’ll handle this in the kitchen. Keep rocking her. I think that helps.”
“Wash your hands!” Matty called after him. She wasn’t sure if rocking helped calm Elizabeth, but it helped calm her. She couldn’t imagine what was wrong with this ditzy Aspen woman. Sebastian was the guy to run to if you had problems, not away from. If he’d accidentally fathered a child, he’d want to do the right thing. If he had any feeling for the mother, or maybe even if he didn’t, he’d want to get married and provide the kid with a name and a matched set of parents.
Any woman who didn’t realize that, especially after knowing him well enough to make love to him, had to be terminally stupid. She didn’t deserve Sebastian or this baby.
He came back in less time than Matty would have expected, but then she remembered Fleafarm’s huge litter ten years ago—more pups than faucets. He’d had to fill baby bottles a lot that spring.
He handed her the formula. “Do you know how to do this?”
“I’ll muddle through. I don’t think it’s rocket science.” She took the bottle. At first the baby was too upset and refused to latch on, but gradually she seemed to understand what was being offered and accepted the nipple.
Silence.
Except for George Strait singing a love song and the crackling of the fire, both of which reminded Matty of what had been planned for this evening. She hoped the baby had kept things from progressing very far.
Sebastian let out a heavy sigh. Then he picked up the sheaf of instructions and sat down in a wing chair facing Matty. He flipped through the papers and took out one. “She was born on January twenty-ninth, which makes her almost two months old.”
Matty didn’t have to work very hard to figure it out. Elizabeth had been conceived on or near Sebastian’s birthday celebration in Aspen last year. She looked up from the tiny baby to gaze at him. “You’re quite a piece of work, you know that?”
“What do you mean?”
“Everybody around here felt so sorry for you because you were having a tough time getting back into the dating game after the divorce. They were so tickled that you finally invited a woman over for dinner, for crying out loud.” Matty hadn’t been tickled, but the rest of the valley had seemed overjoyed. “Meanwhile, you’ve been sowing all sorts of wild oats with some fellow avalanche survivor in Aspen.”
He tensed. “I have not been sowing all sorts of wild oats. I’m not even sure I sowed any.”
“Then what’s this all about?”
His face darkened to a dusky rose. “It’s just that I’m not sure. We were all tanked that night, all of us except Jessica.”
Jessica. Matty hated the name on principle. “Are you saying you can’t remember if you used protection?”
“I can’t remember if I made love to her, period.”
Matty hated this subject, but she had to know the truth, and she was growing impatient with Sebastian’s dense attitude. “Look, you probably did. It was your birthday. It’s logical that if you had something going with her, you’d feel like…celebrating.”
“That’s just it. I didn’t have something going with her. We’re just friends. When you survive something like an avalanche together, you see what people are made of. Jessica has guts.” He paused. “Or so I thought.”
“Mmm.” Matty deliberately kept her response neutral, but a woman with guts didn’t desert her baby, in her estimation.
Sebastian seemed to be considering the same subject. Finally he shook his head in bewilderment. “Beats me how she could do this.”
“You still haven’t explained what happened that might make you the father.”
“Well, we really partied that night at the ski lodge—Travis, Boone, Jessica and me. Our avalanche reunion gig, we called it. We’d hoped Nat could make it, but he had some conflict at the last minute. Anyway, Jessica was staying at the lodge, because she works there as a reservation clerk, and we’d rented a cabin nearby, but not close enough to walk. We were so blitzed Jessica drove us home so we wouldn’t end up in a snowbank.”
“And?”
He blushed even deeper. “Well, you know how it is.”
“’Fraid not.”
“We were all flirting with her for the hell of it, acting like guys, but it didn’t mean anything. At least for me it didn’t. She helped each one of us to bed, and I vaguely remember trying to kiss her.”
Matty braced herself. “And after the kiss?”
“I don’t remember anything after that.”
She warned herself not to hope. “Then how can you assume you’re the father of this kid?”
“Why else would she ask me to be the godfather?”
“A million reasons.” Matty couldn’t stem the tide of hope. “You’re a good friend. You’re steady. You have the resources to handle this sort of responsibility. You’re caring. You’re gentle. You’re—”
“Clueless! I don’t know the first thing about babies!”
“So that’s why she sent the kid with an instruction manual.” Matty felt incredibly lighter. Just friends, he’d said. He couldn’t even remember the experience, if there had been an experience to remember. Elizabeth wasn’t the product of a torrid love affair. At the most, she’d been conceived in a passing moment he couldn’t even recall. Matty smiled down at Elizabeth. Maybe this wasn’t such a disaster, after all.
Sebastian watched Matty feeding the baby. She didn’t seem completely at ease doing it, but she appeared reasonably competent. Besides that, she looked very nice with that baby in her arms. Softer, somehow. She’d left her blond hair down around her shoulders tonight—that could be part of it. Usually she kept it tied out of the way with a bandanna, or twisted into a single braid.
He’d always thought Matty should have kids, but Butch couldn’t have them and he wasn’t the kind of guy who’d consider adopting. Butch. Sebastian’s gut always tightened when he thought about his late, great neighbor. He’d considered him a good friend. He’d mourned his death after Butch accidentally flew his Cessna into a mountain.
Unfortunately, for her parting shot, Barbara had ruined his memories of Butch by revealing their long-standing affair. Sebastian didn’t think Matty knew about that, and he wasn’t ever planning to tell her. He wished Barbara had kept the information to herself, except that it made the divorce easier to accept.
Matty had deserved better than Butch, Sebastian thought as she leaned over Elizabeth and looked into the baby’s eyes. Matty had the most honest blue eyes he’d ever seen. He’d trust Matty with his life, he realized with some surprise. He’d never thought in those terms before, and it startled him.
He could count on one hand the people he’d place that kind of trust in—Nat Grady, Travis Evans, Boone Conner…and Matty Lang. Not long ago he might have included Jessica in that number, but this baby thing made him wonder if he knew her at all. Leaving a two-month-old child didn’t seem to be in character with the Jessica he remembered.
Matty was studying the baby, as if to find some clue about her daddy’s identity. Sebastian was plenty curious about the baby’s looks, himself. Now that she wasn’t all red and screaming, maybe he’d recognize something.
Setting the papers on the lamp table, he got up and walked over to Matty. “Can you tell the color of her eyes?” He hunkered down next to the rocker, balancing himself with one hand on the arm of the chair.
“They could be gray, could be blue. It’s hard to tell.”
He leaned closer and looked into the baby’s eyes. They looked disturbingly familiar. Damn, but they could be the same color as his. This little bundle could be his daughter. His. His stomach twisted. This wasn’t the way he pictured bringing a child into the world, abandoned by her mother and thrust upon a father who didn’t know what the hell he was doing.
“What color are Jessica’s eyes?” Matty asked.
He wrestled his thoughts away from visions of doom.
“Um…let’s see. Brown? Maybe brown. I’m not real sure.” He liked the way Matty smelled, he thought as he compared her light scent to Charlotte’s overpowering perfume. Holding Matty wouldn’t force a guy to wear a gas mask. Holding Matty. Now there was an intriguing thought. She’d probably knock him from here to kingdom come. Or worse, she’d laugh.
She turned toward him with a smile. “Well, that settles it. You’re not carrying a torch for this woman.”
“No, I’m not, but why are you suddenly so sure?” It must be the episode with Charlotte that had him thinking crazy. All that kissing earlier in the evening had him looking at Matty’s wide, generous mouth and wondering how she’d be to kiss. Talk about crazy. This was Matty, a woman he’d known for ten years. Maybe he was only seeking a distraction from his morbid thoughts about this kid.
“A man in love knows the exact color of his lady’s eyes.”
“Is that right?” He’d always gotten a kick out of the definite way she put things, as if there could be no doubt in anyone’s mind that she was absolutely, positively correct. He could use some of that comforting certainty right now. “And how did you come to learn that particular fact?”
“I read.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear that. There’s a thick book in that box I’d love to have you dig into.”
Her smile faded. “Now, wait a minute, Sebastian.”
He muttered a soft curse. “Sorry. That was clumsy. I didn’t mean to imply that I expected anything more of you than you’ve already done.”
“Didn’t you?”
He sighed and pushed himself upright. “I don’t know what I mean. I don’t know what I’m going to do.” He gestured toward the two boxes. “From the looks of this, Jessica’s not coming back tomorrow.”
“No, I don’t think she is.” She hesitated. “Have you considered…taking her to Canon City and…turning her over to—”
“No!”
Elizabeth jerked away from the bottle and started to cry.
“Oh, hell.”
“You scared her.” Matty tried to get the baby to return to the bottle, but she refused. Hands curled into fists, she beat the air and wailed.
The baby’s cries scratched along Sebastian’s nerves like fingernails on a chalkboard. He clenched his jaw, feeling helpless and inadequate.
“Maybe she has gas,” Matty said. “She probably swallowed a lot of air with all that crying.”
“Well, I can tell you this much, she’s too damned little for Tums.”
“Take the bottle.” Matty handed it to him and lifted Elizabeth, positioning her over her shoulder. The baby kept crying as Matty patted and stroked her back.
“Maybe I should hire a nurse.” The idea of a strange woman taking up residence in his house depressed the heck out of him, but it might be the only solution.
“Maybe.” Matty patted a little harder and gradually Elizabeth stopped crying. Then she let loose with a huge belch.
“My God!” Sebastian stared at the baby.
Matty grinned at him. “Delicate little thing, isn’t she?”
“I doubt Travis could make that much noise, and he’s put in hours of practice.” He smiled back at Matty. He’d become so used to her that he hadn’t really looked at her in a long time. But tonight, for some reason, he noticed that she was a pretty woman. Very pretty.
As she held his gaze, her smile faltered. “Listen, maybe you’d rather have a nurse, someone trained to handle a little baby, but I’d be willing…that is, I know I’m not experienced at this, but if you—”
“Are you offering to help me?” He’d never have had the nerve to ask for that kind of commitment. After all, she had as many chores and obligations as he did. But it was what he’d wanted, without fully realizing it, ever since he’d brought the baby into the house. “Because if you are offering, I’m accepting. I don’t want a stranger taking care of Elizabeth if you’re available.”
She took a deep breath and looked straight into his eyes. “I’m available.”
He didn’t think she’d meant that the way it had sounded. He wouldn’t take it the way it sounded, either. Funny, though, how his pulse had picked up at the thought of Matty being…available. He was turning into a nutcase. He needed to get a grip before he found himself propositioning every woman he ran across.
He cleared his throat. “Thank you.”
3
IF MATTY KNEW any good shrinks, she would be in the market for having her head examined. For two solid years she’d mooned over Sebastian Daniels while he’d remained oblivious. Two years in a row he’d run off to Aspen with the guys for his birthday, and he’d admitted to at least flirting with this woman, even if he hadn’t done more than that. Then for his first real date after the divorce, he’d invited Charlotte Crabtree up to the house, not Matty.
Yet all he had to do was look confused and desperate, and good old Matty Lang came running. Still, she wasn’t willing to let another woman take care of this abandoned baby, especially if it turned out to be Sebastian’s.
“We need to make a plan.” She stood, gingerly supporting this unfamiliar bundle against her shoulder, and started toward the dining room. “But first you’d better dig around and find the diaper supplies and the instructions for changing this little girl’s britches. I’m sure she must need it by now.”
“Where are you taking her?”
“The dining room table’s as good a place as any, I guess, although I’ve never personally changed a diaper. I seem to remember my sister using the dining or kitchen table in a pinch.”
His eyes widened. “You’ve never changed a diaper, either? What about with your nieces and nephews?”
“I refused to baby-sit them until they were potty-trained,” she said over her shoulder. “As far as I’m concerned, kids are more interesting when they can talk, and when they’re old enough to learn to rope and ride.”
Sebastian shook his head as he retrieved the instructions from the lamp table. “I can’t believe I’ve run across two women in the same evening who don’t know any baby basics. What’s this world coming to?”
Matty stopped under the arch dividing the living room from the dining area and turned back to him. “Sebastian Daniels, that sounded pretty darned chauvinistic! I offered to help with this kid, but I’m sure as heck not going to take over the whole job. If you’re not planning to do at least half the work, then you’d better hire that nurse you were talking about.”
“I’ll help, I’ll help! Don’t get excited, now. I didn’t mean it that way.”
“Oh, I think you did. It’s very convenient being helpless at these things, isn’t it?”
“Uh—”
“Well, buster, I’m as baby-challenged as you are, so we’ll learn together. And this time, I’ll be in charge of reading the instructions. You can change the diaper.”
He paled. “Me?”
“You’ll be doing it soon, anyway.” She tried not to smile. “You might as well figure it out right at the beginning.”
“Yeah, but—”
“As my granny used to say, we might as well start as we mean to go on. And I mean for you to change at least half of the diapers.” She fixed him with a determined stare, hoping that she looked tough and uncompromising. Inside she was melting at the endearing uncertainty in his eyes, and the worried way he looked at his big hands, as if they weren’t adequate to deal with a tiny baby girl.
He took a deep breath. “Okay.” He located the box with the diapers inside and tossed the instructions on top before picking up the entire box and carrying it toward the dining room. “Let’s do it.”
She’d never felt more like hugging him. Then he set the box on the table and flicked on the overhead, and her good will evaporated. For his cozy little dinner with Charlotte he’d used candles, which she’d sort of expected. But she hadn’t pictured the vase of store-bought roses sitting in the middle of the table or the good china. And cloth napkins. Damn, he’d gone all out.
“I’ll just clear some of this away.” Without looking at her, he hastily stacked dishes and carried them into the kitchen.
For the first time, Matty registered that someone was missing from the household. The baby had distracted her, but now that the little tyke was dozing on her shoulder, she could take better stock of the situation. “Where’s Fleafarm?” she called into the kitchen.
He came back into the dining room, still looking uncomfortable. “Down in the barn.”
“Why?” She had a good idea, but she wanted to see if he’d admit it.
He flushed, and instead of answering, he crossed to the table and grabbed the instructions from the top of the box. “Let’s see. She says something about a changing pad. This saddle-blanket thing must be a changing pad.” He flopped a quilted pad with ducks and chicks on it across the table’s gleaming mahogany surface.
His banishment of his dog made her more indignant than the candles, the roses, the china or the napkins. “What’s the matter? Doesn’t Charlotte like dogs, either?”
“She, uh, mentioned that a dog could sort of…ruin the mood.”
“Go get Fleafarm.”
He gestured toward the box. “I thought you wanted me to—”
“I do. You can be back in two minutes. But it’s cold in that barn, and Fleafarm is getting on in years. I can’t believe you put that poor dog in the barn so that you and Charlotte could play house.”
“We didn’t do a blasted thing, okay? The baby showed up! And I didn’t just drop Fleafarm off at the barn. I made her a real nice bed, with lots of blankets.”
So they hadn’t had time for the planned hanky-panky. In gratitude Matty cuddled the baby a little closer. “I don’t care if you gave that dog twenty blankets. She should be up here at the house. She’s a member of the family, dammit. She probably thinks she did something wrong to make you put her out there.”
“It’s not that all-fired cold.” Muttering under his breath, Sebastian stomped back into the kitchen. He crammed his Stetson on his head and went out the back door. But as if to prove his point about the weather, he didn’t bother with the sheepskin jacket hanging on a hook by the door.
Matty sighed. “Men.” She nuzzled the drowsy baby in her arms. “I can teach you a lot of things, Elizabeth. I can show you how to ride like the wind without falling off, how to quiet a spooky herd of cattle and how to swing the sweetest rope in this valley. But when it comes to men, I don’t have a single bit of advice to give you.”
Shifting the baby’s weight awkwardly so she could pull out a dining room chair, she sat down to wait for that idiot man who was going to freeze his butt to prove a point.
THE NIGHT AIR bit right through Sebastian’s shirt and jeans as he hurried down to the barn. Seeing things through Matty’s eyes, he felt like a damn fool for making Fleafarm bunk down in the barn. But hell, he hadn’t had a date in fourteen years and the process had intimidated him into doing stupid things.
Maybe he should give up on women entirely. Except he didn’t really have that option now, not if Elizabeth was his. He had to find Jessica and discover the truth. If he was Elizabeth’s father, then he’d talk Jessica into marrying him. He’d had to grow up without both parents around, but he’d be damned if his kid would go through the same thing.
He slid back the bolt and opened the heavy barn door. Instead of turning on a light and getting the horses agitated, he whistled softly for Fleafarm in the darkness.
Tags jingling, she trotted toward him and shoved her wet muzzle in his hand.
“Come on, girl. You’ve been sprung.” He held the door open for the dog, then closed it securely after her. Fleafarm was of mixed ancestry. She had the rusty coat of a setter, four white socks and a temperament that hinted of a Border collie lurking somewhere in her background, and the body composition of a retriever.
Sebastian had found her wandering on the road, bedraggled and pregnant, eight years ago. Barbara’s impulsive nickname had stuck, but Sebastian often wished he’d insisted on a more flattering handle for the animal. Fleafarm was one great dog.
She glanced back at him as if asking for permission to go into the house. With a stab of guilt, he realized Matty had been right. The dog had thought she was being punished.
“Go on. It’s okay.”
With a little whine of delight, Fleafarm bounded up to the back door and stood there wagging her plume of a tail, her breath making clouds in the cold air. Sebastian felt like a total heel.
And he felt damned cold, too. The warmth of the house wrapped around him like an embrace when he went into the kitchen with Fleafarm. He rubbed his hands together and blew into them.
From the dining room came the sound of Elizabeth fretting. She wasn’t crying, thank God, just fussing. Fleafarm stopped dead in her tracks and lifted her floppy ears.
“It’s a baby.” Sebastian hung his hat on a peg by the door and laid a hand on the dog’s head. “Don’t reckon you’ve ever been around one.”
Fleafarm gave a sharp little bark and advanced slowly toward the sound that obviously fascinated her.
“Hey, Fleafarm!” Matty called. “Come and say hello to Elizabeth.”
The dog moved warily into the dining room. Then she cocked her head and gazed at Matty sitting in a dining room chair, Elizabeth cradled in her arms.
Sebastian had a moment of uneasiness as the dog drew closer. “Do you think it’s okay?”
“I think it’s essential. You want Fleafarm to be protective of her, don’t you?”
He hadn’t gotten that far in his thinking. “Does it matter? Elizabeth might only be here a few days.”
“She might.” Matty glanced at him. “Or she might be here a whole lot longer. Unless Jessica mentioned a specific time frame for this caper?”
“Not exactly. The note only said she wanted me to be a godfather to Elizabeth until she could return for her.”
“Which leaves this operation completely open-ended. You’d better prepare yourself for more than a few days. I’m not sure you realize yet that your life has just been turned upside down.”
“Oh, it’s beginning to sink in.”
“Good. Facing reality is admirable.” Matty watched the dog edge closer. “It’s okay, Fleafarm. You’ve been a mommy, so you know about babies. This is like a puppy, only bigger. And less hair.” She glanced up at Sebastian. “Maybe you should come on over here and pet Fleafarm while she gets used to the idea of this baby. We don’t want jealousy getting in the way of bonding. And we don’t want Fleafarm to slobber over Elizabeth and scare her to death.”
Sebastian walked over and scratched the dog behind her ears. Then he crouched down and wrapped an arm around the silky neck, restraining her gently. The dog’s coat was cold, and Sebastian was still shivering from his jaunt outside, but he worked to control it so Matty wouldn’t have cause to say she told him so.
He turned to the dog. “You wouldn’t be jealous of that little baby, would you Fleafarm?”
She whined and licked his face.
“Oh, yes, she would,” Matty said. “But if you make sure she knows you still love her, she’ll probably guard this baby with her life. At least that’s the way it worked with my nieces and nephews and the dogs they had. You have to make sure you don’t appear to be giving more attention to Elizabeth than you do to Fleafarm.”
“This sure is getting complicated.”
Matty looked into his eyes. “You still have a choice.”
He gazed back at her. “No, I don’t.”
Elizabeth made a soft, cooing sound, like a dove on a summer morning.
Sebastian glanced at the baby in surprise and pleasure. Now there was a noise he could grow fond of.
Elizabeth stared at the dog and her little fists waved in the air. For the first time Sebastian admitted she was sort of cute, with her fuzzy crop of light-colored hair and round baby face. She cooed again.
Fleafarm whined and wagged her tail.
“Love at first sight,” Matty pronounced.
“No such thing,” Sebastian said. He wasn’t even sure what love was, period. He’d thought he was in love with Barbara, but she hadn’t been in love with him, at least not for very long—and certainly not when she was carrying on with Butch for all those years.
“Maybe love at first sight is rare for people, but for dogs and kids, it happens all the time.” Matty leaned down and kissed Elizabeth on the cheek. “Well, I think that’s enough dog-baby communication for the time being.” She picked up Elizabeth and cradled her against her shoulder. Then she turned her face toward the baby and gave her another kiss. “We can work on it later, okay, sweetheart? Right now I know a little girl who needs her diaper changed.”
“I was hoping you’d done it while I was out getting the dog.”
Matty grinned. “I’m sure you were. You’d better go wash your hands, and use hot water to warm them up. No lady likes to be touched with cold hands.”
Damned if that comment didn’t get him to thinking of touching Matty, which he’d done before, but only as a friend. Now he was wondering how it would be to touch her like a lover.
She’d said Fleafarm might be jealous of the attention the baby was getting. Well, Sebastian found himself mighty jealous of the way Matty was cuddling Elizabeth, giving her kisses and nuzzling her. He’d never known Matty to be so openly affectionate, but then he’d never seen her with a baby, either.
He wondered if she’d been playful and snuggly with Butch when the two of them had been alone. If she had been that open and vulnerable, his heart ached for her, because she’d been married to a faithless man.
“Oh, don’t scowl like that.” Matty laughed. “I doubt if changing a diaper is going to be any worse than mucking out a stall.”
“Says you, the person who has no more experience than I have.” He wiped the frown off his face and was glad she’d misinterpreted it. Pushing himself to his feet, he clucked to Fleafarm and got her settled under the table, one of her favorite spots.
“Don’t worry,” Matty said. “You’ll be a diapering fool in no time.”
“That’s what I’m afraid of.”
She gazed at him. “Are you worried that you’ll ruin your macho reputation with the guys?”
He grimaced, and her soft laughter taunted him as he headed into the kitchen to wash up. To be honest, he hadn’t thought of himself as doing this sort of chore if he ever became a parent.
With her usual dexterity, Matty had exposed another uncomfortable truth about Sebastian Daniels. Whenever he’d imagined being a father, he’d sort of skipped the baby stage in his mind. He’d pictured buying the kid a pony, helping with homework, flying kites. He hadn’t pictured changing diapers. Apparently he’d unconsciously assigned baby care to the mother. Not very enlightened.
Well, Matty wouldn’t let him get away with being unenlightened. He smiled as he soaped up and ran warm water over his chilled hands. Matty wouldn’t let him get away with a damn thing. He realized he’d always counted on her to tell him the truth, and at the moment he needed the truth more than anything else. He needed Matty. Thank God she’d offered to help him.
They hadn’t figured out any details yet, though. This little bundle of joy would need looking after twenty-four hours a day, and he’d feel much better if both of them were on hand, at least at first. He wondered if Matty would consider staying over until they’d established some workable routine.
Yeah, that was the answer. The three of them needed to stick together for a while. They could all drive over to Matty’s place and do her feeding and chores, then come back here and do his. This time of year the main job was making sure fences were ready for the yearlings they’d buy in May. His fences were in decent shape, and he could help Matty with hers if she needed some repairs done. In fact, it’d be sort of fun having Matty around all the time. He began to whistle under his breath.
IN THE DINING ROOM, Matty laid Elizabeth on the changing pad. Sebastian’s tuneless whistle drifted in from the kitchen, teasing her nerve endings. She was beginning to question the wisdom of her impulsive offer. Only one course of action made sense, for her to stay over at the Rocking D until they came up with a regular schedule for the baby.
On the surface it wasn’t a difficult proposition. Getting the work done on both ranches wouldn’t be a problem. Until they bought the cattle in May, they only had to fix fences and take care of the horses. Her dog Sadie got along fine with Fleafarm. Sebastian had a spare bedroom.
But every time Matty thought of sleeping here, of sharing every meal and every waking hour with Sebastian, her stomach churned. With that much togetherness, he would eventually figure out that she had a huge, incurable crush on him.
For years, she’d hidden it successfully behind a tough ranch-woman facade, but caring for this tiny baby would make that a hard act to maintain. Already she’d felt unexpected longings as she cradled the helpless infant in her arms. Maybe the reason she’d refused to take care of her nieces and nephews when they were babies was that she’d subconsciously known it would be a painful reminder that she had no babies of her own.
Sebastian came into the dining room, his hands held high as if he’d scrubbed for surgery. “My gown, nurse.”
As she gazed at his strong, hair-sprinkled forearms and capable hands, hands she’d dreamed would someday touch her with tenderness, funny things happened to her heart. “Smart aleck,” she said, and grinned because he expected that. But she was so afraid everything she was feeling shone in her eyes that she glanced away. “Come on over here and take hold of this kid so I can start reading up on how we accomplish this. We don’t want her falling on the floor when we’re not paying attention.”
“Oh, God.” He blanched and hurried over to the table. “Maybe we should just do it on the floor so there’s no chance we’ll drop her.” He moved in close, hip-to-hip with Matty.
“Yeah, down there with the dog hair and the bread crumbs. That’d be super.” She put an inch or so of space between them. After the way she’d been thinking a moment ago, body contact wasn’t a good thing. She maintained her sisterly tone of voice with difficulty. “You do a decent job of cleaning for a guy, but I wouldn’t want to put a baby on your floor. The table’s fine if we keep track of her. Here, put your hand on her chest and keep it there while I get the instructions.”
Sebastian settled a tentative hand on Elizabeth, who stared up at him without blinking. “I wonder if she knows that we’re greenhorns at this diapering business?” he said.
“If she doesn’t know now, she will soon enough.” Satisfied that Sebastian had Elizabeth secured on the table, Matty moved away and picked up the typed list of instructions. She had to give Jessica points for thoroughness. She must have been somewhat concerned about the kid to go to all this trouble.
Matty scanned the pages until she found the section on diapering. “Okay, we’ve got her on the changing pad on a flat surface and we’re making sure she doesn’t roll off. Now unsnap the sleeper gizmo so you can take it off the bottom half of her.”
Sebastian started fumbling with the small snaps with his free hand. He blew out a breath. “I can’t do it with one hand. Would it bother your feminist sensibilities to help with this one part?”
“I guess not.” But it played hell with her hormones to move in close enough to smell his citrus aftershave and feel the warmth of his body close beside her. She put down the instructions and concentrated on the snaps as best she could, considering that all she wanted was to snuggle against him and feel those strong arms around her.
“Why does she keep staring at me like that?” he asked.
Because all females do, you lunkhead. You’re gorgeous. “She’s probably trying to figure out who the heck you are.”
“I think she has my eyes.”
“You know what? I’m not so sure.” She didn’t want to believe that Sebastian had made love to Jessica, even if he couldn’t remember the incident. She hurried on with the instructions. “Now you carefully unfasten the tabs on the diaper and slowly take it off, because—” Matty started to giggle.
“Because?” Sebastian prompted.
She spoke around the laughter choking her up. “It says here that you never know what you’re going to find and you need to contain whatever you encounter.” She wiped her eyes and chuckled. “I’ll say this for your Aspen friend. She has a wry sense of humor.”
“Oh, she’s a laugh a minute, dropping babies on doorsteps like this,” he muttered as he worked at the tabs on the diaper. “Can you come over here and put a hand on this little girl while I wrestle with these tab things? I can see right off this is a two-person job.”
Matty did as he requested, which made them very chummy, their bodies bumping against each other, his warm breath on her neck, his elbow nudging her breast. She tried to remain oblivious and failed.
“What’s that perfume you’re wearing?”
“Wh-what?” She couldn’t believe his thoughts had been anywhere near hers.
“What kind is it?”
“I forget the name.” Her heart pounded. “It’s supposed to smell like jasmine. Why?”
“I like it.”
“Oh.” She tried to tell herself that it didn’t matter one way or the other. He was making idle conversation. But what if he wasn’t?
“There, it’s off.” He sighed with relief. “We lucked out. It’s just wet.”
She laughed, feeling giddy from his comment about her cologne. “I don’t think your luck will hold forever on that score, cowboy.”
“Probably not. What’s next?”
She glanced at the set of instructions she’d forgotten she clutched in her hand. “Roll up the diaper and dispose of it later. Then clean her with a baby wipe.”
“Where’s that?”
“Hold onto her.” Matty extricated herself. “I think I saw them in the box.”
“Can you imagine me doing this all by myself? I would have killed her by now.”
She found the baby wipes, pulled one out of the container and handed it to him. “No, you wouldn’t, but it does seem to take both of us to replace one experienced mother.”
“That’s what I’ve been thinking.” He leaned over Elizabeth. “Hold still there, little one.”
Watching him tend to the baby with such gentleness made Matty’s throat tighten. He was going to be one hell of a daddy, if it turned out this little bundle belonged to him.
“Matty, do you think you could see your way clear to stick around here for the next few days?” he asked casually, not looking at her as he continued to work on Elizabeth.
Her heartbeat quickened. Although she’d been expecting the request, she wasn’t ready with her answer.
“I know it’ll be a pain in the neck,” he continued, still concentrating on the baby. “But I don’t see how else we can manage this. We can bring Sadie over here, of course, and I’ll help you take care of things at your place. We could drive over a couple of times a day. If you’ve got fence to mend, I’ll be happy to help you with it.” In the silence, he glanced up at her. “You’re being mighty quiet.”
“I’m thinking.”
A coaxing light came into his gray eyes. “I really need you here, Matty. I’d be petrified to be left alone with this baby right here at the beginning.”
As if she ever could have denied him. When he looked at her like that, she’d give him anything he wanted, including her heart. “Okay,” she said. “I’ll stay over.”
4
MATTY WOULD STAY. Sebastian almost keeled over in relief. The seemingly impossible job of dealing with this baby had been whittled down to a workable size.
“I think Elizabeth’s ready for her diaper,” he said with newfound confidence. He held out his hand. “Lay one on me.”
Matty gave him one from the box. “Go to it.”
Sebastian took the folded diaper and spread it on the table with one hand while he kept the other on Elizabeth’s chest. “Seems easy enough. We’ll just work in reverse. All we have to do is—”
Elizabeth squealed and started to kick and wave her arms.
“Hey!” The diaper slipped from his fingers onto the floor as he grabbed the baby with both hands. “Now is not the time to learn boot-scootin’, Elizabeth!”
The baby stared up at him and gurgled. Then she made that soft little cooing sound he liked so much.
A knot of anxiety loosened inside Sebastian’s gut when he heard the happy little noise, the same one she’d made when she’d seen his dog for the first time. Apparently she could tolerate the idea of having a cowboy like him take care of her. Secretly he’d been worried about that. Just because Jessica had decided to leave the baby with him didn’t mean the baby would like it much.
“I think you’ve made a friend,” Matty said softly.
He was embarrassed by how pleased that made him, so he minimized the significance of it. “Yeah, any friend of Fleafarm’s is a friend of hers.”
As if in response, the dog nudged his leg. Sebastian glanced down to see Fleafarm standing patiently beside him, the fallen diaper held delicately in her mouth.
“Oh, my God,” Matty said. “That is beyond cute.”
Fleafarm wagged her tail and looked up at them expectantly.
“Good dog!” Matty rubbed behind Fleafarm’s ears. “Thank you so much.” She took the diaper. “Now go lie down. That’s a good girl.”
“We’re not using a diaper that is covered with dog slobber, are we?”
“Pretend like you’re using it,” Matty said out of the corner of her mouth. “Don’t hurt her feelings by rejecting her offer of help.”
Sebastian sighed and took the diaper. “As life gets ever more complicated.” Then he made his tone bright. “Look, Elizabeth! Fleafarm picked up your diaper. The diaper we are going to use to cover your cute little tush. This very diaper. Absolutely. This one.” He shoved it into the middle of the table and grabbed the new one Matty slipped quietly to him.
About that time Elizabeth started kicking and cooing again. “Damn, how does anybody do this all by themselves?”
“I seem to remember my sister had a strap on her changing table. And a mobile hanging over it, to distract the kid. Let me see if I can help keep her occupied.” Matty moved around him, leaned down toward the baby and spoke in a low voice. “Now, Elizabeth, if you’ll stay very, very quiet, I’ll tell you a deep, dark secret. Something not very many people know. But you have to promise never, ever to breathe a word of this to anyone. Promise?”
Sebastian hadn’t ever heard Matty use that tone of voice. It sounded almost seductive, like the sort of tone a woman might use during lovemaking. He wondered if that’s the way Matty sounded when she—
“Sebastian?” She glanced up at him. “I’m trying to hypnotize this kid, not you. Get busy.”
“Oh. Yeah. Right.” He snatched up the diaper. “I’m on it.”
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