Wicked Kiss
Wicked Kiss
Michelle Rowen
MY KISS CAN KILL.I used to be ordinary Samantha Day, but that’s changed. Now, after one dark kiss from a dangerous boy, I can steal someone’s soul…or their life. If I give in to the constant hunger inside me, I hurt anyone I kiss. If I don’t…I hurt myself. Bishop is the one whose kiss I crave most, but if I kiss him, I’ll kill him. Then there’s another boy, one I can’t hurt. One whose kiss seems to miraculously quell my hunger.They’re both part of a team of angels and demons that’s joined forces in my city to fight a mysterious rising darkness, an evil that threatens everyone I know and love. I just wonder if I’ll be able to help Bishop–or if I’m just another part of the darkness he’s sworn to destroy….NIGHTWATCHERS BOOK 2 ‘Gorgeous angels, suspense & romance…’ -Richelle Mead on Dark Kiss
MY KISS CAN KILL.
I used to be ordinary Samantha Day, but that’s changed. Now, after one dark kiss from a dangerous boy, I can steal someone’s soul...or their life. If I give in to the constant hunger inside me, I hurt anyone I kiss. If I don’t...I hurt myself.
Bishop is the one whose kiss I crave most, but if I kiss him, I’ll kill him. Then there’s another boy, one I can’t hurt. One whose kiss seems to miraculously quell my hunger. They’re both part of a team of angels and demons that’s joined forces in my city to fight a mysterious rising darkness, an evil that threatens everyone I know and love. I just wonder if I’ll be able to help Bishop—or if I’m just another part of the darkness he’s sworn to destroy....
“Why are you here, Samantha?” His deep voice, edged with displeasure, came from right behind me.
I clutched the railing tighter and squeezed my eyes shut, trying not to breathe at all, but that was kind of impossible. Even soulless, voracious monsters like me needed oxygen.
When I inhaled this time, his familiar scent—warm, spicy and totally devastating—slid over me.
Finally I forced myself to face him and my breath caught.
I’d almost forgotten how effortlessly he affected me.
Bishop’s dark brows were drawn tightly over intense cobalt-blue eyes. He towered over me—a full foot taller than my short five-two. Broad shoulders. Sinewy muscle rippled down his arms
under his long-sleeved black T-shirt, which was drawn tight
across his chest. His mahogany-colored hair was messy tonight.
I had a sudden urge to slide my fingers through it to push it off his forehead. I fisted my hands at my sides to keep from automatically reaching toward him.
The angel had had that effect on me from the first moment I met him. Uncontrollable. Compulsive. Irresistible.
Praise for Dark Kiss:
“More, please! Gorgeous angels, suspense and romance...this book has everything I love. I was pulled in from the very first sentence.”
—Richelle Mead, New York Times bestselling author of the Vampire Academy series
“Awesome story line, awesome characters...I highly recommend Dark Kiss as a must read.”
—I Heart YA Books
“A must read for all you angel/demon lovers out there... An outstanding start to this fab new series.”
—The Book Hookup
“Fantastic writing style, a sweet romance and...original and intriguing angel/demon lore.”
—diminutivemimi.blogspot.com (http://www.diminutivemimi.blogspot.com)
Wicked Kiss
Michelle Rowen
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
Contents
Chapter 1 (#u77791954-0d77-5499-9375-919d57e624f0)
Chapter 2 (#uc8f029fa-cf2a-5c97-b8a7-a48cfff22f25)
Chapter 3 (#ufa77b56d-8564-5b6c-8063-b7a4c8688d39)
Chapter 4 (#u2b386cfe-473f-55b9-81b2-ab9b125159d6)
Chapter 5 (#uc80105e3-2bc7-5dfd-ad1f-eaedb3fe6120)
Chapter 6 (#u3949894d-b258-5b73-b844-de17ae364ed8)
Chapter 7 (#ubb163fbc-6e93-56ec-9832-f3544ee58a2e)
Chapter 8 (#u2143a4ed-2fb1-5837-842d-195f2de7905f)
Chapter 9 (#ue6e09f7f-f14b-5c5b-a18a-4a1e4ab565ef)
Chapter 10 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 11 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 12 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 13 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 14 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 15 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 16 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 17 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 18 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 19 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 20 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 21 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 22 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 23 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 24 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 25 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 26 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 27 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 28 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 29 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 30 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 31 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 32 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 33 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 34 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 35 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 36 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 37 (#litres_trial_promo)
Acknowledgments (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 1
Crave used to be a prime hangout for dangerous monsters, but tonight I seemed to be the only one here.
A week ago, I lost my best friend in the whole world in this very club. Literally lost her, in a swirling black vortex that opened up and swallowed her whole, and took her...somewhere else. Somewhere horrible.
I didn’t know how yet, or when, but I clung to that small yet resilient hope that had taken firm root inside of me: I would find her.
Carly had loved this all-ages nightclub and came here every weekend like clockwork, dancing till the place closed down. If I shut my eyes I could still see her on the dance floor, the one place she could forget her problems and let the music become her entire world.
Damn, I missed her.
But I had to come back tonight. I couldn’t wait any longer.
There was somebody I had to find who used to hang out here a lot. Somebody I’d been searching the city for. Somebody who’d stolen something from me that I needed back before it was too late.
I had no real idea when “too late” was going to be. But I had a sick, gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach that we were getting really close.
“You look way too serious, Sam,” Kelly said lightly from across the booth. “And you’re not even listening to anything we’re saying.”
“Sorry,” I began, my head still in a fog. I forced a smile to my lips and looked at Kelly and Sabrina—both blond and perky cheerleader types. I wasn’t blond, nor was I particularly perky or cheerful. But they were both good friends of mine, anyway.
Well, maybe good friends was pushing it. We usually ate lunch at the same table and we had gym class together. I think they liked me. That totally counted.
After their invite earlier today, I’d decided to join them here for a “girls’ night out.” At least, that’s what they thought it was. For me, it was an excuse to be here on the off chance I might find the boy who’d literally stolen my soul.
“Yeah,” Sabrina agreed. “Like, earth to Samantha. What’s up with you?”
“Nothing. I’m just a bit distracted tonight.”
Understatement, table for one.
Kelly took a sip of her Diet Coke and eyed the remains of the nachos that sat on the table between us. There wasn’t much left, thanks to me—just a bit of cheesy sludge and a couple soggy tortilla chips. A single jalapeño pepper remained, lying there mournfully after the battle its friends had lost.
I couldn’t help it. I was really hungry tonight. And when I was hungry I needed to eat so my other cravings didn’t kick into overdrive.
Unfortunately, the plate of nachos hadn’t helped a bit.
“FYI, we were talking about Halloween,” Sabrina reminded me. “Do you know what you’re wearing to Noah Tyler’s party?”
“Noah’s having a party?” I asked absently, keeping my eyes on the club over her shoulder while still trying my best to appear attentive.
“Yeah. And he did tell me that he really wants you to be there.” She grinned. “I think somebody’s got a crush on you.”
It took me a moment to clue in to what she meant. I cringed at the thought, and also the vague realization that Noah had been checking me out lately. I’d tried to ignore it. “He doesn’t.”
She shrugged and the girls shared a knowing look. “Whatever you say. But you’re coming, right?”
“Wednesday night?” I forced a look of interest as well as a cheery smile though I felt anything but. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
I was definitely going to miss it. No question.
They discussed their costumes. I half listened. The jalapeño pepper died a quick and painless death.
Then I stayed behind as a song came on that they got incredibly excited about and they made their way to the nearby dance floor. A sprinkle of colorful lights fell across their faces as they joined the swell of other kids dancing to the throbbing beat of the techno song—from a close bump and grind to a frenetic waving of arms and legs. I used to do a kind of uncomfortable shuffle thing when it came to dancing. I had always been hyperaware that somebody might be watching, judging, laughing. All of the above.
“Dance like nobody’s watching,” Carly always insisted.
“Did you see that embroidered on a cushion somewhere?”
She’d give me a grin. “Probably. But it’s still true. Gotta enjoy every moment because you never know when it’s going to be your last.”
The memory of the eternal optimism of Carly Kessler made my throat too thick to swallow down another gulp of my ginger ale. I returned my full focus to scanning the club, the entrance, the dance floor.
We’d been here for an hour. An hour to consume a plate of nachos, chat with a couple girls who generously tolerated my company, watch a couple hundred kids having a good time on a Saturday night, remembering that I used to be one of them, and to realize that this wasn’t getting me anywhere.
The scent in the air was intense and it made it increasingly hard to think. Not sweat or perfume—something else. Something deeper that slithered around me like a boa constrictor, squeezing painfully tight.
While I might look like a normal seventeen-year-old girl to anyone who didn’t know otherwise, without my soul I was now a “gray,” someone that had the ability to steal someone else’s soul through a kiss.
It was a mistake to come here. It’s only getting worse.
“Relax,” I commanded myself.
But it was hard to relax when you couldn’t let yourself breathe deeply. Shallow breathing was the best way to maintain control in a busy place like this. I’d come here to find a missing person, not to pick out a potential victim.
Finally, desperately needing to keep my mind off my unnatural but growing hunger, I pushed away from the booth and moved toward the brass railing that surrounded the dance floor and separated it from the seating area. I gripped the smooth, cold metal hard enough to make my knuckles turn white. After a few moments, my aching hunger finally eased off.
And then it spiked back up to maximum.
“Why are you here, Samantha?” His deep voice, edged with displeasure, came from right behind me.
I clutched the railing tighter and squeezed my eyes shut, trying not to breathe at all, but that was kind of impossible. Even soulless, voracious monsters like me needed oxygen.
When I inhaled this time, his familiar scent—warm, spicy and totally devastating—slid over me.
Finally, I forced myself to face him.
Bishop’s dark brows were drawn tightly over intense cobalt-blue eyes. He towered over me—a full foot taller than my short five-two. Broad shoulders. Sinewy muscle rippled down his arms under his long-sleeve black T-shirt, which was drawn tight across his chest. His mahogany-colored hair was messy tonight. I had a sudden urge to slide my fingers through it and push it off his forehead. I clenched my hands into fists at my sides to keep from automatically reaching toward him.
“Why am I here?” I forced myself to say it casually. “Why wouldn’t I be? Crave’s a great place to hang out with friends.”
“You’re looking for Stephen.”
I shrugged a shoulder, tore my gaze away from his and studied the dance floor.
“Samantha.”
The way he said my name always made me shiver. Still, this time my gaze shot back to his with more annoyance than nonchalance. “I know you want me to stay home every night with the door locked, but I can’t do that. Besides, I haven’t heard from you in a few days. I figured I was on my own again.”
Bishop’s expression remained frustratingly neutral. “I’ve been looking for him.”
“Found him yet?”
His jaw tensed. “Believe me, you’d be the first to know if I had.”
“Well, if you haven’t found him, then it sounds like you need help. That’s why I’m here.”
He hissed out a sigh. “Seriously, Samantha. You need to go home and let me handle this.”
Hot anger ignited inside of me, helping me resist my automatic pull toward him. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Bishop’s brows were drawn together, but a smile now tugged at the corner of his lips. “Feisty tonight, aren’t we?”
“Define feisty.”
“Samantha Day. Seventeen years old. Normally a realist who knows right from wrong, but is currently glaring at me like she wants to punch me in the stomach.”
“Good definition.” Something suddenly clicked for me. “You seem strangely okay tonight. What happened?”
The smile fell from his lips completely. “I’m not okay. But I’ve found another way to deal with my problem when I have to.”
“How? I didn’t think your particular problem came with a multiple choice solution.”
“Neither did I.”
He might look like a gorgeous eighteen-year-old boy, but Bishop was actually an angel who’d been sent here to Trinity to take care of the gray problem. But something went horribly wrong when he left Heaven. Another angel who wanted to sabotage his mission had made him a “fallen” angel—one with a soul. The soul was a punishment to those truly fallen. It wreaked havoc with their mental stability, causing them to go slowly insane. But it was also necessary for their ongoing survival. A soul to a fallen angel was a true double-edged sword. It messed up their minds, but without it they would perish.
I’d kissed Bishop once and taken part of his soul—it had been the most amazing and horrible kiss of my entire life. Now I instinctively wanted more. And part of him—like any gray’s victim—wanted to be kissed again.
Yeah. You could say it was a complicated relationship.
“Well, I’m glad,” I said. “I guess now I know why I haven’t seen you lately. If you don’t need me to help you find your sanity, then you can focus on the mission instead. Sooner it’s completed, the sooner you can find a permanent solution to your problem. Right?”
“You think that’s why I’ve stayed away? You don’t think it’s hard for me to be this close to you right now?” He leaned dangerously closer. “Remember, it’s not just you suffering here.”
My hunger level shot through the roof.
Oh, yes. I remembered.
When his hand closed on my wrist, a shiver of electricity zipped across my skin. My eyes snapped to his. “You really shouldn’t touch me if you don’t need to.”
“I know.”
The rest of the club seemed to fall away so there was only he and I left behind.
Right now, Bishop was too close and smelled way too good.
“I haven’t had any slipups since I last saw you,” I said, my voice strained. “I can control this until we find Stephen.”
“I know you’ve been on your best behavior.”
I looked up at him, confused. Then clarity dawned. “Wait. Are you saying you’ve been watching me the past few days?”
“It’s not always me. And it’s not all the time.”
I gaped at him, the thought that he’d been monitoring me made me feel like a potential shoplifter. “You don’t trust me.”
His brows drew together. “This isn’t about trust.”
“Sure it is.”
“If Stephen tries to contact you when you’re alone, then I need to know.”
I swallowed hard. “I’m worried you—or one of the others—is going to find him first and stick your dagger through his chest with no questions asked. One less gray to clean up later. But that can’t happen. I need him alive, so you need to back off.”
That painfully sexy smile touched his lips again as he studied me. “Yes, definitely feisty tonight.”
I snorted softly, but refused to let down my guard completely. “I need my soul back. I can’t live like this.”
“I know.”
The music shifted to a new song, even louder than the one before, if that was possible. The ground shook with the nearby dancers stomping on it. A waitress holding a tray of fried appetizers moved past us.
“Are you here alone?” I asked.
He glanced toward the far corner of the dark and noisy nightclub. “No. Brought some backup to help with the search while the others are out on regular patrol.”
I looked to see who it was and cringed at the sight. Someone tall and blond and familiar.
Kraven worked with Bishop to save the city from things like me. At first glance I would have guessed that Kraven was another angel.
Nope.
Heaven and Hell worked together very occasionally on problems that threatened the integral balance of light and dark, good and evil.
Soul-eating monsters were just such a threat.
Kraven represented the dark side of the scale.
He was with a girl off in the corner and it was obvious that he was hitting on her. Heavily. He braced his hand over her shoulder, creating a partial cage she looked in no hurry to escape from. She grinned up at him as if in love. For all I knew, maybe she was.
As I watched him warily, wondering what his plans for that innocent—or not so innocent—girl were, he glanced over his shoulder at me. A cool smile curled the corner of his mouth.
“Yeah, he looks like he’s really helping the search,” I said with disdain. “If you’re searching for slutty girls.”
“Distractions happen.”
I chewed my bottom lip and looked up at him. “I’m surprised that out of the whole team you’d pick your demonic brother to spend the evening with.”
Bishop’s expression tightened.
When he finally released his hold on my wrist, I grabbed the front of his shirt before he could move away from me.
“Are you ever going to tell me more about the two of you?” I’d come up with no reasonable explanation of how one brother became an angel and the other a demon, despite the tiny breadcrumbs of info I’d collected along the way.
“There’s nothing to tell.”
“Yeah, right. How about you at least tell me the name you had when you were human? I know one thing for sure—it wasn’t Bishop.”
“Okay.” He eyed me. “It was Barbara.”
“You’re hilarious.”
“And you still look like you want to punch me.”
“I’m barely restraining myself, actually.”
That smile returned to play at his lips. His gaze moved to the other side of the club and his expression grew grim again. “I need to talk to Roth. Wait here.”
Another team member. Another demon. Roth, however, made Kraven look like a friendly teddy bear. And Kraven was not a friendly teddy bear by anyone’s definition.
“I thought you wanted me to leave?” I said.
“I’ll take you home when we’re done here. Give me five minutes. Stephen’s dangerous and I don’t want you finding him by yourself.”
“I can handle him.”
Bishop returned my challenging look with one of his own. “Five minutes.”
“Fine.”
I watched as he walked across the club to where tall, handsome and hateful Roth stood by the long bar that only sold nonalcoholic beverages and appetizers. The crowd of kids swelled to cut off my view of the two.
Even with Bishop gone, my hunger hadn’t faded one bit. Strange. I thought I’d get a chance to compose myself better.
“Hey, Samantha.”
Damn. I glanced over to see Colin Richards standing right next to me. He was poised directly in what I’d termed my “orbit of hunger.” Two feet or less. The danger zone.
“Colin,” I squeaked out. “Hey.”
I wasn’t romantically interested in Colin at all, but unfortunately, the feeling wasn’t mutual. He’d taken my rejection hard, especially when I showed very nonrejection behavior whenever he entered the orbit and I couldn’t control my hunger quite so well. Most people respected your personal space. Colin wasn’t one of them.
He swept his gaze over the short, black skirt and silver tank top I’d chosen to wear so I’d fit in with Kelly and Sabrina and the rest of the Saturday night crowd.
“You’ve kept a low profile this week,” he said. “Are you specifically avoiding me, or just generally being a bitch to everyone?”
I winced at his sharp words, but then I smelled the alcohol on his breath. So much for this being a booze-free club. Some kids tried to sneak it in, anyway. Colin was becoming well-known for drinking too much and getting into trouble. When he dated Carly over the summer, he’d made a bunch of vodka-fueled bad choices, including cheating on her at a pool party.
“Nice,” I said drily. “And maybe when you sober up, you won’t be such an ass.”
This earned me a humorless snort as he drained whatever was in his plastic cup. His gaze slid down the front of me again as if he was having trouble keeping his attention on my face. My cheeks grew warm at his blatant gaze.
“Who was that guy you were talking to?”
I blinked. “None of your business.”
“Your boyfriend?”
“Again, none of your business.”
He was being very confrontational tonight, which made me sad. Colin was actually a really nice guy, despite some of the more epic mistakes he’d made in the past. And I knew I’d hurt him last week, so I wouldn’t hold this particular discussion against him in the future. This time, anyway.
Walk away, I told myself. But my feet refused to move. I fought my rising hunger with every ounce of strength I had. The more I fought, the colder I got until goose bumps broke out over my bare arms and I shivered, despite the club being at least eighty degrees. The cold was a side effect of not having a soul.
Colin leaned closer, which only made things worse. I didn’t smell the vodka on his breath anymore; what I smelled was warm, tempting and entirely edible. Less so than Bishop, but still more than anyone else in this club right now.
“Heard from Carly?” he asked.
That woke me up like a glass of cold water thrown in my face.
Colin, like almost everyone else, believed Carly had run away with a secret boyfriend and was off having a misguided, but romantic adventure.
“No,” I said softly. My eyes began to burn.
He snorted again. It was an unpleasant, mocking sound. “Look at you, all misty over Carly taking off with some guy. Feeling abandoned by your BFF? Poor Sam. Boo hoo.”
I gave him a careful look. “I know I hurt you—”
“Hurt me?” he scoffed. “Please. I’m over it.”
“Yeah, sure you are.” I studied him, uncertain how to deal with this problem. “Look, Colin, I’m sorry. Really. But it’s for the best. You don’t need to be near me right now. In fact, I’d appreciate it if you backed off before my friend gets back.”
“Jealous, is he?”
I’d had more than enough of this conversation and I needed him to step away from me now. “Leave me alone, Colin. I don’t like you. At all. Get it through your head, okay?”
I forced myself to look at the dance floor again.
“You’re such a liar.” His words slurred together, heavy with enough underlying pain to make me flinch. “Everything that comes out of your mouth is a damn lie. You liked me. I know you did. I saw it in your eyes. You think you can just walk away from something like that? That I’d let you?”
Let me? “I think you need to go—”
But before I could say another word, Colin grabbed hold of me and crushed his mouth against mine.
Chapter 2
No!
I tried to pull away from him, to shove against his chest as hard as I could.
But it was too late. The hunger that had swirled around me the entire time I’d been at Crave, which had intensified to an impossible to ignore level when Bishop was close to me, that waited patiently while Colin blurted out what was on his mind—
It spilled over.
The pounding dance music muted. The sparkling lights faded. The club disappeared. My rational thinking ceased. And my hunger took over.
This wasn’t a kiss with a drunk boy who liked me and was mad I didn’t like him in return. This was about feeding—that part of me that was missing a soul and was constantly trying to devour everyone else’s.
It was what I feared the most. I didn’t want to hurt anyone. But that was exactly what I was doing.
Feeding on Colin was so natural for me. In this mindless state, it was the most natural thing in the world—neither good nor bad. And with every bit of his soul I devoured, delicious warmth spread through me, chasing the horrible, endless cold away. My thoughts about hurting him vanished. I would feed until I was satisfied, and since I’d barely ever fed before, that would take a long time.
Someone grabbed my upper arm and painfully wrenched me away from Colin. Colin staggered back and dropped down into a nearby booth. Thin, black lines branched around his mouth and his skin was sickly pale. His eyes were glazed. His chest moved rapidly as he gasped for breath.
Haven’t taken it all. Just a piece...
The grip on my arm tightened and I turned to see that it was Kraven now in front of me, shaking his head.
“Honestly,” he said. “Can’t let you out of our sight for a minute, can we?”
“Let go of me!” I was working on instinct only, still possessed by the hunger. I stared at Colin. “I need more.”
“You need more?” Kraven grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him instead of Colin. “Try this.”
He kissed me hard, releasing my arm to slide his hands into my long hair. I automatically tried to feed, but there was nothing there. Regular demons like Kraven didn’t have souls. This was the proof. With no soul to feed from, this was just a kiss.
And yet, strangely enough, it still seemed to satisfy me. I wasn’t feeding, but my hunger began to ease a fraction at a time.
But then the kiss stopped. Abruptly.
“What the hell are you doing to her?” Bishop snarled.
He grabbed hold of Kraven and wrenched him away from me, slamming the demon hard against the wall.
Bishop’s eyes blazed bright blue. They did that sometimes. He’d told me it was a bit of celestial energy that rose up when he got emotional. Based on the current neon brightness, he was very emotional.
My head continued to clear, although not as rapidly as I’d have liked it to. I staggered back from them and landed in the booth across from the slowly recovering Colin. A quick sweep of the club showed that nobody was paying us any attention.
Neat trick that demons and angels had—they could cloak an area to gain a little privacy when problems arose.
Kraven shoved Bishop back from him. “Sorry, but your little girlfriend was in need of some help.”
“That was you helping?”
“Worked, didn’t it?”
I sent a look at Colin. My mind had now cleared completely and my control was back. Guilt and horror slammed through me at what I’d done. The black lines around Colin’s mouth had faded completely, but his eyes were still glazed. A gray’s victim seemed to go into a short-term trance while they were being fed upon. Since I’d experienced it from the victim’s side, I knew that it felt way better than it looked. Exciting, exhilarating, amazing—just like a good kiss should be.
But there was nothing good about this kiss. If I’d successfully taken all of Colin’s soul, I could have killed him. Or, if he was strong enough to survive it, he would become another gray, capable of hurting others.
Either thought scared the hell out of me.
My gaze shot to Bishop. “Colin kissed me. I—I’m sorry. I couldn’t help myself after that.”
Colin shook his head as if to clear it. He glanced at me, and then at the two tall boys staring at him.
“What—?” he began.
“How do you feel?” Bishop asked him.
He scrubbed his hand over his forehead. “Um, okay, I think. What happened?”
Bishop grabbed the front of his shirt and yanked him out of the booth. “Don’t kiss her again. Ever. You hear me?”
Colin gaped at him. “Who are you?”
“You don’t want to know. Leave now.”
Bishop let him go and Colin staggered back, then glanced at me as if waiting for me to defend him. Instead, I forced myself to look down at my hands, which I’d clasped in my lap.
“Sorry,” he began. “I, uh, don’t know what I was thinking.”
Without any further argument, he slunk away from us and was swallowed by the rest of the crowded club.
“Your girlfriend’s a great kisser,” Kraven said drily. “Her tongue is like...wow. She doesn’t hold back. You’re really missing out with that pesky soul of yours.”
Bishop turned on the demon, his eyes flashing. “Stay away from Samantha or I’ll kill you.”
“This is the thanks I get for saving the day? She was going to suck that kid dry right here in the middle of the club. Besides, why are you mad at me? I think some of that angel attitude should be pointed in her direction. Or can gray-girl do no wrong in your eyes, even when she slips up? Or slips someone else the tongue?”
Bishop’s expression didn’t lose a fraction of its fury. “I think you do want me to kill you. Is that your goal?”
Kraven gave him a humorless smile. “Don’t know. How many times can one brother kill the other? Are you looking for some kind of Guinness World Record here?”
“Try me.”
Kraven liked to mess with the minds of others, but I wasn’t in the mood for it now. He wasn’t helping anything by baiting Bishop like this.
“Why do you have to be like this?” I asked.
He finally spared a look in my direction. “Please. You should be thanking me for saving your pretty little ass a minute ago. Instead, I get vilified. Whether either of you wants to admit it or not, the kiss worked. It snapped you out of your monster madness.”
Bishop’s brows drew together as if he was considering this possibility. His gaze then hardened. “We’re leaving.”
Kraven saluted. “Yes, sir.”
I’d wanted to come here tonight so I could find some answers. I’d honestly thought I was in control of myself and my hunger.
But I’d hurt Colin, and if Kraven hadn’t stopped me I could have killed him.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered to Bishop as I pushed myself up from the booth.
Bishop didn’t meet my eyes. “How much of that boy’s soul did you take?”
I couldn’t help but notice that he hadn’t replied to my “I’m sorry” with a breezy “it’s okay.” Couldn’t blame him for that.
I let out a shaky breath. “Not much.”
“Be careful. He’ll instinctively seek you out in the future so you can finish the job.”
“How do you know?” Kraven asked.
“Believe me, I know.”
I was definitely ready to leave. I’d done more than enough damage for one night. Stephen wasn’t here so there was no reason to hang out a moment longer. I wanted to run home and hide my face from the world, but instead I tried to stay calm and not let anyone see how devastated I was. I said a quick goodbye to Sabrina and Kelly, who’d thankfully missed all of my drama while they’d been busy dancing.
Roth caught up with us at the front door past a poster advertising Wednesday’s “Halloween Bash.” We exited the club, and the cool, late-October air immediately chilled me. Stars sparkled in the clear, black sky and the moon, along with the parking lot floodlights, lit up the night around us. I ignored the cold, instead pulling my too-thin coat tighter around my shoulders.
Roth scanned the three of us silently trudging along the sidewalk. “Did I miss something?”
Bishop’s jaw tightened. “No.”
“Me and gray-girl just made out,” Kraven said.
Roth made a face. “Disgusting. Why would you want to kiss something like her?”
“Research.”
I expected no less from Roth. I was well aware that he despised me. Tonight only proved that I was in more trouble than I thought.
I scanned the night surrounding us, anything to take my attention off what had happened with Colin and Kraven.
“I’m taking you home,” Bishop said.
I took a deep breath and let it out. “To keep me out of trouble.”
“For starters.”
At that moment I spotted something in the sky that grabbed my attention. I felt the color slowly drain from my face. “Can’t go home. Not yet.”
“Why not?”
I pointed at the sky behind him where a familiar searchlight had just appeared in the distance—although I knew none of them could see it like I could. “Looks like you’re getting a new recruit.”
Chapter 3
“Don’t know why a gray can do this,” Roth grumbled as he trailed after us. “Why can she see the searchlights when we can’t?”
He didn’t know the truth and neither did Kraven. Only Bishop knew and he’d sworn me to secrecy about it.
I wasn’t just a gray.
Bishop always talked about the universal balance and how important it was. Well, I was about as balanced as you could get. Equal parts dark and light thanks to my birth parents—whom I’d never met. Up until a week ago, I didn’t even know I’d been adopted.
My father was a demon named Nathan, my mother was an angel named Anna.
Anna had been killed shortly after I was born and Nathan had joined her in the Hollow, her final resting place. The same place Carly had been sucked up into.
Theirs was a forbidden romance doomed from the start, but it had produced yours truly. Because of this, I was what was termed a “nexus”—the center, the connection—and the fact that I’d lost my soul meant I could allegedly channel the powers of both Heaven and Hell.
It helped me do things, see things. It made me special. It made me valuable. Clinging tightly to this thought after what I’d done to Colin was the only thing keeping me from completely freaking out.
“Why are they sending someone else?” Kraven asked, ignoring the other demon. He didn’t sound happy.
“I don’t know,” Bishop replied. He walked so close to me that I could barely concentrate. My hunger still had me tightly in its grip and the scent of his soul, of him, did crazy things to my head. “You’re sure it’s one of our searchlights, Samantha? Not just a regular one?”
“Positive.” The light that shone up into the sky was restoring my hope with each step I took. I moved toward it like I was following a rainbow to a guaranteed pot of gold.
A sixth member for the team would mean one more chance to find Stephen. At this very moment, I didn’t care if he turned out to be a demon or an angel.
However, when we followed the searchlight to its origin, I found something I wasn’t expecting.
“Well?” Bishop asked when I stopped walking. “Where is he?”
“Not a he.” I pointed shakily in the direction of the girl up ahead. As soon as my gaze locked on her, the light disappeared. It only ever stayed on long enough for me to make visual contact.
She was young—like me. Seventeen, maybe. She had long, pale blond hair. She wore ripped jeans and a black sweater. She wandered along the sidewalk next to a busy street with her arms crossed over her chest as if trying to keep warm.
I’d always thought it was incredibly sexist that Heaven and Hell had only sent boys on this mission to save Trinity. Looked like they’d changed their minds.
“This is ridiculous,” Roth said. “Girls are useless.”
Just the sound of his voice rubbed me the wrong way. I didn’t waste my breath in arguing with him, but he must have felt the heat of my glare.
“They are,” he insisted.
“Whatever you say. Obviously, you know everything.”
“Finally, you’re starting to get me.” He laughed darkly. “Let’s hurry up. I’d rather be out killing things like you tonight than play follow the leader. At least, until we finally get a crack at you.”
“Shut up, Roth,” Bishop growled. He’d moved to stand between me and the demon while Kraven watched us, amused.
Fear slid through me at the way he’d said it. So bluntly. Like this was a guaranteed thing. “What are you talking about?”
He looked at me like I was stupid. “You’re a gray. As long as things like you are still breathing, that barrier is up, trapping you—and us—in this city. When you’re all dead, the barrier vanishes and we’ll be pulled back where we belong. You think we’re giving you a pass forever because of this magical mojo you can do?”
“Roth.” There was a sharp edge of warning in Bishop’s voice.
Roth snorted. “We’re going to kill her, it’s just a matter of time. You said so yourself.”
My breath left me in a rush. “You said what?”
Bishop’s gaze flashed to me. “I didn’t say that.”
“So he misunderstood you? Please tell me how that sort of message could get messed up.”
Kraven laughed, an unpleasant sound that slithered under my skin. “Bishop didn’t come right out and say we had permission to kill you. But he said if you slip up and start munching on souls then you’d become a problem we’d have to deal with. Better?”
“Is that true?” I shot a searching look at Bishop.
His expression was unreadable. “We’ll talk about this later.”
“No, we’ll talk about it now.”
“Later,” he said again firmly. “Go home, Samantha. We can handle the girl.”
I stared at him, trying to read his frustratingly hard-to-read face. I suddenly wanted to run—far away from here, far away from these three...even Bishop, who normally made me feel safe. At least, I thought he did.
But I stood my ground. I refused to be chased away that easily. I couldn’t let myself give in to my fear. “I’m not leaving yet. I can still help you tonight.”
Disapproval slid through his blue eyes. “Fine. Stay. Your choice.”
I could prove to them that what happened at the club wasn’t really me. It was a slipup, not an indication that I was losing it. And when I got my soul back, my hunger would be gone. The cold I always felt would fade away. I would be as normal as I could ever hope to be.
“Feeling a connection to the blonde chick?” Kraven asked with a smirk. “How sweet. Maybe you can be best friends. I know you’re looking for a new one since the last got flushed away.”
I didn’t know why I was surprised that he could be so thoughtlessly cruel. My only defense was to put on a good game face. The best way to combat sarcasm was with more of the same.
“Or maybe you can bite me.”
His grin stretched. “Is that an invitation?”
“Not tonight...James.”
His smile fell.
I knew his human name. He’d shared it with me in a moment of weakness, and I knew it bothered him when I used it.
“Gray-girl’s got a smart mouth,” Kraven muttered. “It’s going to get her in trouble someday.”
“You’re right,” Bishop said. “It will.”
He was mad that I hadn’t tucked tail between my legs and scurried home like a good little monster. But I was staying for the ritual. I would be there for the new girl, no matter what.
I knew what was coming. She didn’t. Right now, she’d have no memory of why she was here. The invisible barrier that stretched over Trinity, put in place by the combined powers of Heaven and Hell, was designed to keep supernaturals in the city. But it also kept supernaturals out. To get in, angels or demons had to be specially protected against it. It also stripped away memories. The only thing that helped pinpoint a demon or angel was the searchlight—the one only I could see.
The ritual was what restored them to their former demonic or angelic selves. If it wasn’t performed, they’d wander the city forever with no idea who they were.
I would rather not have to witness the ritual again—to put it mildly—but I couldn’t just walk away and let this girl deal with these three without a shred of moral support.
Her pace had quickened. She knew she was being followed. Before long, she found herself in a blind alley, in a less populated neighborhood. She turned to face us, holding her hands up in front of her.
“I don’t want any trouble,” she said uneasily.
“Do we look like trouble?” Kraven asked, looking down at himself. “Honestly. I’m a little insulted.”
“Let’s do this,” Roth said.
Bishop shot him a look. “Patience.”
The girl’s gaze moved to me and a measure of relief went through her eyes. I knew I looked pretty harmless. Nothing more than a teenager dressed to go clubbing on a Saturday night, my long dark hair loose around my shoulders. Nothing to fear.
Not at first glance, anyway.
“Who are you?” she asked.
“A friend,” I told her, forcing myself to sound calm. “My name’s Samantha.”
She swallowed hard. “Why are you following me?”
“Because we want to help you. We know you’re having problems. We know you don’t know who you are.”
Her blue eyes widened. “How could you know that?”
“Magic,” Roth said with a thin, unpleasant smile.
Bishop was the one who always performed the ritual, but he wasn’t making any sudden moves.
“I think I hit my head.” She scrubbed her hand through her blond hair. “I woke up earlier and I—I didn’t know where I was. I’m sure I’ll be fine in a little while, so...thanks, but I don’t need any help.”
Despite the chill in the air, sweat dripped down my back and my palms were damp. “You will be fine. I promise.”
“Samantha’s right. You’ll be fine.” Bishop finally pulled the curved golden dagger out of the sheath he wore under his shirt, along his spine.
Her eyes shot to it immediately and widened with fear. “What is that?”
“Check her back.”
Kraven grabbed hold of both of her wrists in one hand. He pulled at her sweater and she let out a frightened shriek.
I stormed forward and punched him in his arm. “Do you have to be such a jerk? You’re scaring her!”
“Sorry, sweetness. There isn’t really a polite way to do this.”
“Samantha, please don’t let them hurt me,” the girl begged. A tear slid down her cheek and she trembled, but didn’t try very hard to break away from Kraven’s grip.
My heart wrenched for her. “I need to check something real quick. Everything will be better soon. You need to trust me, okay?”
“O-okay.” Her voice quaked.
I took a deep breath and pulled her sweater up her back a few inches so I could see her skin. The lines of the tattoo I’d been hoping to see were visible immediately, wrapping right around her sides and past the waistline of her jeans.
“Is it there?” Bishop asked.
A small but immediate measure of relief coursed through me. “She has an imprint. She’s definitely the right one.”
She stared at me with confusion. “An imprint? What’s an imprint?”
I nodded and returned her sweater to its previous position. “Something that will make everything all right in just a minute.” I looked into her blue eyes and the fear I felt for her must have been reflected there. The panic instantly returned to her gaze.
Her breath came quicker. “What do you mean? What are you going to do to me?”
“Do it, Bishop,” I bit out, nausea coursing through my gut. “Quickly.”
I thought he’d hesitate and show some sign of reluctance for what he had to do. Sometimes I mistook him for a gentle angel who struggled with sanity and needed help from time to time.
But he wasn’t gentle. And he didn’t need any help right now. He was a warrior who didn’t flinch when it came to taking action.
He nudged me out of the way and looked in the girl’s eyes. A coldness moved over his face that scared me.
“Be brave,” he said, as if issuing a command. Then he thrust the dagger into her chest without another moment’s hesitation.
My knees gave out at the same time hers did.
It’s the ritual, I told myself over and over. She’s not human. This isn’t really murder.
The only way a demon or angel could get their memories back after passing through the invisible barrier and into Trinity was to temporarily die—provided that death came from Bishop’s very special golden dagger. The dagger did something, some magic, which removed their protective shielding and restored their former sense of self.
If they were ever stabbed again with the same dagger, however, it would kill them.
I stared down at the blonde girl now lying on the ground of the alley with the dagger sticking out of her chest.
“That was so awesome,” Roth breathed.
“You’re sick,” I snarled at him.
“Your point?” The demon leaned over and yanked the dagger out of her chest when Bishop didn’t reach for it first.
My mind reeled over witnessing this horrible act yet again. “I need to talk to you, Bishop. Alone. Now.”
“Uh-oh,” Kraven said. “Somebody’s in trouble.”
“Fine.” Bishop nodded to the left. “Let’s go over there.”
“Need a chaperone?” Kraven asked. “Wouldn’t want her to get any ideas. Maybe fake murder turns gray-girl on.”
Bishop sent a glare in his direction. “Stay here and watch over the girl.”
“Eat me.”
Apparently, Bishop took that as a “yes, I’ll stay here and watch over the girl.” He led me to a spot farther down the alley and just around the corner. I cast a last glance at the blonde now lying as if dead on the pavement of the alley while two demons lurked nearby waiting for her to wake up again.
“I told you to leave,” Bishop said, his voice and expression equally tight. He wasn’t meeting my gaze. “So if you’re upset about what I had to do, you only have yourself to blame. I was doing my job. I didn’t enjoy that.”
I knew he was right. It was his job—one he was remarkably and chillingly good at. “Look, I—I’m sorry about what happened at Crave tonight. I know you’re mad at me.”
“You think I’m mad?”
“You should be mad.”
“Should I?” He raised an eyebrow, his harsh expression finally thawing at the edges. “Okay, then I’m mad.”
“I knew it.”
“Still, you should have left. I know the ritual upsets you. Especially since it was a girl this time.”
“Which is kind of ridiculous. I’d all but gotten used to it happening to boys. Why should a girl be any different? Maybe I’m the sexist one here.”
“She’ll be fine.”
“You didn’t hesitate. Not even a second.”
“Does that bother you?”
“A little,” I admitted, but held his gaze. “Are there a lot of female angels?”
“Is that what she is? I didn’t see the imprint.”
I nodded. Since angels and demons didn’t have actual wings here in the human world—apparently such things were not physical as much as they were metaphysical—they did retain the mark of such wings. It looked like a large tattoo that stretched across their backs and down their sides. Angel wings were pale with delicate, feathery lines. Demon wings were bold and black and webbed. It was the only way to tell them apart at a glance.
“There are an equal number of male and female angels,” he said.
“Equal. Everything’s equal,” I grumbled. “Got to keep the balance on the universal teeter-totter, don’t you?”
He studied my face. “I know you’re upset.”
I didn’t break our eye contact. “Did you really tell Roth he could kill me if I screw up?”
He didn’t speak for a moment. “No.”
The demon had said it with such certainty, there had to be more to this. I needed to know the truth. “Then what did you say that gave him that idea?”
His gaze grew fiercer. “You can’t let what happened earlier with that boy ever happen again. It’s too dangerous, Samantha.”
It was so cold tonight—or maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it was just me and my soulless side effects. My coat wasn’t thick enough to keep me warm. The tights I wore under my skirt were too thin. I shivered. “That’s the real reason you’ve stayed away from me this week. So I wouldn’t be tempted to kiss you again. So I wouldn’t hurt you again.”
His vivid blue eyes burned into mine. “You didn’t hurt me the first time.”
“But I could next time.”
“We don’t know that for sure.” He wrenched his gaze away from me, his expression shadowing. “I kept my distance because I needed to know if this pull I feel toward you was because of what you are. If this soul inside me has been a magnet drawing me closer to you since the first moment we met.”
It was what I’d also feared. That this—this overpowering thing I felt for Bishop wasn’t real. That it was just another side effect, like me being cold and hungry all the time. All because he had a soul and I longed for it. “And?”
His brows drew together. “Inconclusive. I’ll know for sure when we get your soul back.”
My heart pounded like a wild thing in my chest. “You think it’ll be that simple? Find Stephen, find my soul, pop it back in like a battery pack? Snap, Samantha’s back to normal and you won’t feel so weird around me?”
“Nothing important is ever that simple.” He searched my face. “Let me do my job. Let me find him. And then we’ll figure everything else out.”
I pushed a hand through my hair, tugging on a tangle, and realized I was literally trembling. “Quite honestly? Roth is right. Even if you purge the city of every single other gray, I’m still here. That means the barrier stays right where it is and you’re stuck here.”
“It’s fine.” Bishop rubbed his fingers over his temples, his frown deepening. “All is fine. All will be fine. I swear it will. Nothing to worry about. Nothing, nothing at all.”
There was a worrisome edge of madness to his voice, something I remembered all too well from before. “Are you okay?”
“Why wouldn’t I be? Everything’s fantastic.” When he laughed, it had a sharp, insane edge to it.
He wasn’t okay. Far from it. “You said you’d found alternate ways of dealing with the crazy when it landed. How exactly is that? Deep breathing? Meditation?”
“Something like that.”
“Care to expand?”
“Not really.”
His insistence on always being evasive made me crazy. “Nothing’s really changed, has it? You don’t tell me anything.”
“I tell you what you need to know. But some things...you don’t want to know.”
I flinched. “I thought we were in this together. Like a team. The others don’t know the secret about me....”
“And you are never to tell them.” He grabbed my shoulders tightly as if what I’d said had alarmed him. The craziness in his eyes intensified. “You hear me? None of them can ever know about your birth parents.”
“I hear you. Relax.” I reached down and grabbed his hand. Electricity sparked between us and the insanity began to ease from his expression.
Skin to skin. Touching him only spiked my hunger, but it was essential—at least right now—for him to calm down.
The others knew I could do this, just like I could see the searchlights. But they didn’t know the whole truth like Bishop did.
“Better?” I asked.
“Much.” He nodded, entwining our fingers together for a moment that was equal parts blissful and torturous before he reluctantly let go. “I know you’re frustrated by some of the things I do, but you have to trust me.”
“I want to...”
“But?”
My throat tightened as I locked gazes with him. “How can I trust somebody who won’t even tell me his real name?”
“My name is Bishop.”
“It wasn’t always.”
“No. Not always.” He looked into my eyes and for the briefest moment I was certain he was going to tell me. Then something shuttered there, keeping me out when I only wanted in.
Don’t get me wrong, I liked his name. I loved his name, really. It was right and it suited him. But it wasn’t real. It was something made up, like an actor in Hollywood who wanted to leave his humble beginnings far behind.
If anything, I felt uneasier than I had before our private talk. I followed him wordlessly back to the dark alley to find Roth hovering over the angel while still holding the knife. The way he watched her was predatory.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I demanded.
“She’s so hot. Too bad she’s an angel.” He gave me a cold grin. “I checked under her sweater.”
A sudden flash of fury turned my vision red. “Touch her again and I’ll kill you myself.”
“Chill out, gray-girl.” Kraven stood nearby with his arms crossed over his chest. “I was chaperoning from a disinterested distance. Don’t worry, he didn’t get frisky. It was just her back.”
“She smells so good.” Roth crouched down lower so he could put his face close to hers. “Like strawberries and whipped cream. It’s making me hungry.”
“Get away from her,” Bishop warned.
“Make me.”
All I wanted to do was protect this defenseless girl. I was about to move toward Roth and kick him as hard as I could, hoping to do a little damage with my high heels, when she let out a gasp and her eyes snapped open.
“Back from the dead.” Roth gazed down at her lasciviously. “Welcome, beautiful.”
She stared up at him hovering over her with the knife in his grip. Then her hand shot out and grabbed his throat.
“Get off me.” She pushed him upward and then slammed him down to the ground. She easily disarmed him and held the knife to his throat.
He looked up at her straddling his chest, his eyes wide with surprise.
“That I didn’t expect,” Kraven said, from where he leaned against the wall. “But I kind of like it.”
“Easy.” Bishop approached the furious angel. “It’s okay.”
“How is this okay?” she demanded. “He was sniffing me like a horny dog. Very unprofessional. He must be one of the demons.”
“I’m definitely enjoying this,” Roth said with a lewd grin. “You can sit on me anytime, beautiful. Clothing optional.”
“You’re disgusting.” She jabbed the knife into his throat deep enough to cut him. He winced and blood trickled down his neck. The mocking edge to his expression disappeared. “I despise demons.”
In a single effortless movement, she got to her feet and inspected the golden dagger. Her gaze flicked to Bishop. “Who’s the leader here?”
“I am,” Bishop said.
“Depends on the day, really,” Kraven muttered.
The blonde’s gaze shot to him. “You’re another demon, aren’t you?”
“Is it my cologne or my good looks that gave me away?”
I was becoming more impressed by the second. I’d expected her to be scared and uncertain, like she’d been before. But this angel could kick some serious ass.
“I’m Cassandra,” she said when her attention fell on me. “You said your name’s Samantha, right?”
“That’s right. Samantha Day.”
She cocked her head. “I thought you were human, but...” She looked at Bishop. “I sense that she’s soulless—a gray. I don’t understand.”
“Samantha’s different from the others. I’ll explain everything later.” Bishop’s eyes flicked warily to the knife the blond angel clutched. “I’m Bishop. That’s Kraven. And the demon on the ground in need of a Band-Aid is Roth. Welcome to Trinity, Cassandra.”
“Glad to be here.” She rubbed her previously injured chest and gave him a bright smile. “Stupid ritual.”
“I couldn’t agree more.” He grinned back at her.
I’d been more than prepared to like Cassandra, but a dark ribbon of jealousy suddenly appeared out of nowhere to twist through me.
“Take me to your headquarters and we’ll debrief,” she said.
“Sure thing.” Bishop glanced at me. “Samantha, go home.”
The gorgeous, blond angel gets a killer smile and I get the brush-off. Awesome.
“No,” Cassandra said. “She’s coming with us.”
“Is that necessary?” Bishop asked.
“I have a few questions for her.”
He flicked a glance at me before returning his attention fully to Cassandra and he gave her another knee-weakening grin before offering her his arm. “Of course. Anything you like.”
She took his arm and he began to lead her away, ignoring the rest of us.
I glanced at Kraven as that sharp-taloned jealousy I was trying to ignore began to leave claw marks on the inside of my chest.
He smirked at me. “Love hurts, sweetness.”
Chapter 4
I only had myself to blame. Bishop said I should go. Instead, I insisted on sticking around to help the helpless girl who wasn’t helpless at all.
Now I felt like a specimen under the microscope as Cassandra had been watching every move I made since we got back to St. Andrew’s, which was the abandoned church in an abandoned neighborhood the team had chosen as their makeshift “headquarters” and temporary hotel. Along with yours truly, the blonde angel swept her appraising gaze over the tall ceiling, stained-glass windows and rows of pews in the main sanctuary. Since there was no electricity, hundreds of candles were lit throughout, giving the area an eerie glow.
My feet hurt from these heels—which were meant for nightclubs, not brisk walks through the city streets. Still, the pain gave me a focal point. I concentrated on my aching feet rather than the threads of panic stitching unpleasant patterns through my gut. Even though I’d been given an uneasy pass when it came to the team, I still had a lot in common with a mouse in the middle of a group of feral cats. It didn’t matter if they had halos or horns.
While Cassandra studied me, I studied Bishop. Hard not to. My gaze was always drawn to him when he was in the same room as me. I couldn’t ignore him if I tried.
I refused to believe it was just because I was attracted to his soul, even if that was his hypothesis for my unearthly infatuation with him.
I didn’t feel like this toward Colin. Or anybody else with a soul.
Bishop was different for me. Different from anyone.
And when his gaze followed Cassandra through the sanctuary as if he couldn’t look away from her, the gnawing ache inside me suddenly had nothing at all to do with hunger.
The other demons had taken seats in the pews on opposite sides of the church. Kraven sat three rows from the front.
“Why’d they send another angel?” he asked sullenly, cutting through the silence that had fallen since we’d arrived here. “I thought we were supposed to be all nice and balanced. Now it’s four against two.”
“An exception was made,” Cassandra replied crisply. “Demons are rarely trustworthy enough to be part of a rare mission like this without causing trouble. Present company excluded, of course.”
“Don’t try to butter me up now, Blondie. You already said you despise demons.” His lips curled to the side. “It’s almost like you’re trying to hurt my tender feelings.”
She grimaced. “I apologize. That was rude of me. Truth is, I’ve never even met one before face-to-face.”
Roth sat in the front row, eyeing her with caution while rubbing the shallow wound at his throat. Demons and angels usually healed much faster than humans, but after the ritual, when the wound was caused by the golden dagger, it was a different story.
It was more dangerous to a supernatural than any other weapon.
“Can you heal Roth?” I asked Cassandra. I needed to say something, to be part of the conversation, not just the helpless mouse who lurked in the corner trying not to squeak. “Not that you’d want to heal him, but I was just wondering if all angels had that ability.”
“We can, in varying degrees of strength. I’m quite a strong healer.” Her gaze shifted to the demon. “Do you want me to heal you?”
Roth shrugged. “Whatever.”
Her expression soured as she moved closer to him. “A real charmer, aren’t you?”
“I try my best.” Roth stiffened as she reached toward him and brushed her fingers against his throat. There was a soft pulse of light and his tanned skin healed right before my eyes.
“You’re very gifted,” Bishop said. His angelic powers were limited due to his fallen status. He watched Cassandra with a wistful envy that made my heart hurt for him.
“Now that that’s done we can deal with the problem at hand.” Cassandra turned to the rest of us. “Your mission was to clear this city of its recent infestation of soul-devouring creatures. Yet one is here with us right now. Why?”
“Good question,” Roth said.
I wouldn’t underestimate this angel. She might look harmless, but she was anything but.
At the same time, I didn’t blame her for her confusion. I’d ask the same thing if I was in her position.
“Samantha’s different,” Bishop said calmly. “She isn’t ruled by her hunger.”
Kraven snorted at that, and I shot a dark look at him.
“Something funny?” Cassandra asked.
“No, ma’am.” He put his laced-up boot-clad feet over the back of a pew bench and crossed his ankles casually. I braced myself, expecting him to share what happened earlier at Crave, but he kept his mouth shut.
Shocker. But I’d reserve my gratitude for later.
Bishop raked his hand through his short, dark hair, his gaze flicking to me for a weighted moment before returning to Cassandra. In the shadowy light of the church, I wasn’t sure if his eyes were glowing or if it was the candlelight.
“Samantha’s important to us,” he continued. “She has a special psychic ability—she can see the searchlights. I can’t because I’m damaged from my fall.”
“I did hear about what happened,” Cassandra said, her brows drawing together. “I’m pleased you seem very capable despite the misfortune that’s befallen you.”
“Doing the best I can.”
“You must be very angry.”
“Someone sabotaged me, sabotaged this entire mission. Now I’m forced to deal with the consequences of having this soul. Can’t say I’m happy about it.”
“Nor should you be. What happened to you is unfair.”
“That’s putting it mildly.” He snorted humorlessly, reminding me uneasily of his brother. “I hold out hope that it’ll be corrected when the mission is complete and I’ll be pulled back with the others.”
“One should always have hope.” Cassandra turned to eye me curiously. “So you have supernatural intuition. It’s rare, but not unheard of. Perhaps you’re mentally stronger than other humans.”
“I do pretty well in school,” I said as lightly as I could. “Mentally, that is.”
Cassandra and the others could never find out what I really was. If demons and angels were forbidden to be together—to such an extent that this love had destroyed my mother and sent my father into the Hollow after her—I knew if anyone learned the truth I’d be in even worse trouble than I already was.
“Samantha isn’t what I expected,” Cassandra finally said. “When they briefed me about grays, I thought they would all be the same.”
“I know.” Bishop crossed his arms over his chest. “We were told we’d find mindless creatures driven by their hungers—created by an anomalous demon who devoured souls. That much was true. But it’s not always like that for those who’ve been kissed—and I believe it’s not only Samantha who’s different. We’ve taken to eliminating only those who’ve completely lost their control and their reason. Anything else would be murder.”
Something heavy inside me lightened at this confirmation, a part that was worried he and the others were indiscriminately slaying grays across the city.
“Is that why you’re here?” I asked her. “Because all the grays haven’t been wiped out of the city yet? Because the barrier’s still up? Are you like...like some sort of quality control agent sent to assess how things are progressing?”
When I got nervous, I started talking and asking questions. I was surprised I’d been able to hold my tongue this long.
“Yeah, Blondie,” Kraven spoke up. “Just what are you doing here?”
“I have a mission, of course. Part of it is to assess how the team is succeeding...” She paused. “Or failing.”
“What is your main mission?” Bishop asked.
She swept her gaze over the four of us before she said anything. “We know the Hollow is not acting as it normally does.”
Just the sound of its name spoken aloud made an unpleasant shiver race through me.
“Are interdimensional gateways to supernatural graveyards ever that reliable?” Bishop’s expression had relaxed and his tone felt almost too light.
Bishop had as snarky a sense of humor as Kraven did, only he usually kept it under wraps as leader. However, he seemed different with Cassandra around. More relaxed, more easygoing. I wondered if it was because he felt comfortable with her here...or if it was just the opposite.
“What have you learned about it?” Cassandra pressed, and she shifted her gaze to Roth.
He shrugged a shoulder. “It opens when it’s supposed to—at the death of a supernatural. Sucks in the garbage. Then it closes up. Other than it spitting the Source of the grays back out to cause this current little citywide infestation, I don’t think it’s changed all that much.”
She frowned. “So it’s true. What has been cast into the Hollow now has a chance to return.”
I didn’t have to look to see that Bishop had drawn closer to me. I felt it.
“We think so,” he said. “If a supernatural finds him or herself in the Hollow, there is the chance for escape. But the barrier is here to keep anything that gets loose in the city contained so we can deal with it.”
“Keeping us trapped here like rats also,” Roth grumbled. “All grays should die. Thinking any other way is just delaying the inevitable. And, for the record, I don’t think that Bishop’s pet gray should be given a break. We don’t know that her soul can be restored.”
“Excuse me?” Cassandra said, her gaze moving to me again. “Your soul is still in existence?”
“The one who took it managed to contain it,” Bishop answered before I could. “We mean to find him and retrieve it.”
She watched me again like a scientist studying a fascinating microbe. “This must be why you’re different, Samantha.” She looked at Bishop. “Right?”
“Perhaps,” he conceded, but he believed I was different due to my secret origins.
Either way, I needed my soul back. It wasn’t even a question.
“Very good.” Cassandra nodded and slowly trailed her gaze over Bishop’s body. It was leisurely enough that the sour taste returned to my mouth. “Despite your personal difficulties, you appear to have everything under control here.”
“I do.”
“Then why are you bleeding right now?”
My eyes shot to him.
“Excuse me?” he asked tightly.
She pointed at his abdomen. “How were you wounded?”
His jaw tensed. “It’s nothing.”
“Bishop!” I exclaimed. “What is she talking about? Are you hurt?”
He didn’t look at me. “No.”
“Pull up your shirt,” Cassandra instructed. “Let me see.”
After another hesitation, he reluctantly reached for the bottom of his long-sleeved T-shirt and raised it up to show his flat, muscled abdomen. My breath lodged in my throat. There were three deep cuts in his skin. The flow of blood had slowed, but it had soaked through his shirt. Since the material was black I hadn’t noticed anything before.
I was horrified that he’d been walking around with these wounds all night and I’d had no idea. “Oh, my God! What happened to you?”
His gaze flicked to me. “Nothing. I was going to get Zach to heal me next time I saw him.”
“Nothing? That’s not nothing! Who did that to you?”
“He did it to himself,” Kraven said with disinterest, exchanging a wry look with Roth. “It’s his new thing.”
All I could do was gape at Bishop. “Why would you cut yourself like that?”
“The pain helps me concentrate,” he said through clenched teeth. “It takes my confusion away. I need to be able to keep my focus, no matter what.”
I clasped my hand over my mouth, stunned. This is what he’d discovered during the days we’d been apart. This is why he hadn’t needed me to touch him to help clear his mind.
Instead of sympathy for his struggle, hot anger surged through me. “That was an unforgivably stupid thing to do!”
His gaze hardened. “I found a solution. I used it.”
A strangled sound escaped my throat. “Yeah, fantastic solution, Bishop. Self-mutilation. Really brilliant.”
Kraven snorted.
It was as if someone had just drawn a blade over my skin as well and pressed down hard. He’d chosen to inflict injury on himself rather than seek me out. The realization stung like hell.
He lowered his shirt, frowning deeply. “I didn’t want you to know about this.”
“Such a martyr,” Kraven drawled. “Spare me the drama.”
“I assume you used the Hallowed Blade to do this. Otherwise, it would have healed by now.” Cassandra was pushing Bishop’s shirt back up. “Hold still.”
She placed both hands over his wounds and a few moments later, with that soft pulse of light from before, the cuts disappeared.
She didn’t let go of him right away, standing intimately close to him.
“Better?” She smiled up at him.
“Better. Thank you.”
“I know how hard it must be for you to deal with the side effects of your soul. I wish I could do more to ease your pain.”
I literally trembled with the effort it took not to close the distance between us and wrench her hands away from him. Even though I knew she’d helped him, I didn’t like how she was touching him.
I’d known Cassandra the Perky Blonde Angel for an hour now and I was insanely and irrationally resentful of her immediate connection with Bishop. I hated feeling this way, all these gnawing doubts in my gut joining my ravenous hunger pains.
Cassandra was beautiful, capable, smart and strong—and she could heal injuries with a mere touch. She was an angel, too. They had everything in common with each other.
Irrational or not, I hated her stupid blond guts.
“Do you give everyone this kind of personal attention?” I asked. “Or just Bishop?”
She glanced at me and gave me a small smile. “I healed Roth, too.”
I felt the heat of Bishop’s gaze on me, but I didn’t look directly at him. I knew every word that came from my mouth made me sound like a petty, jealous girlfriend. I’d always hated girls like that.
I fought hard to keep any discernible emotion out of my eyes. Despite our undeniable connection, Bishop wasn’t my boyfriend. I had no real claim on him at all.
I mean, I didn’t even know his real name.
That’s what my brain knew—that Bishop wasn’t mine.
My heart, however, had a totally different opinion on the subject.
Before anyone could say anything else, the side door clanged shut and a few seconds later, Zach and Connor entered the church sanctuary with us.
Great, I thought drily. The gang’s all here.
Zach was tall and thin, with red hair, freckles on his nose and clear, green eyes. He was kind and thoughtful, and typically did the healing in the group. I knew this from personal experience. Connor was an inch or two shorter, with dark skin, and hair so short I considered it shaved. He always had a joke to help lighten the mood. The two had forged a close friendship since they arrived, and usually went out on patrol together.
“Patrol” was the term for their endless city walks in search of grays who’d lost their minds, their control, who were so driven by their hunger that they became a true and monstrous threat to anyone they crossed paths with. Those grays were targeted for death—their bodies swept away to the Hollow after the deed was done. The golden dagger wasn’t required to kill a gray. They might be supernatural, but they were still mortal.
If I gave in to the kiss much more, I’d also become one of those zombie grays. Which was why what had happened with Colin had frightened me so much. Once a gray turned to that zombie state, there was no coming back from it. The horrible thought of losing myself completely kept me awake at night staring at my ceiling with my sheets pulled right up to my neck.
“We have a visitor,” Connor said with surprise as he noticed Cassandra—and it was very hard not to notice the beautiful blonde. “Hi, there. I’m Connor.”
“A pleasure.” She nodded.
Zach’s previous smile faded at the edges as his gaze widened with recognition. “Cassandra.”
“Zachary. I’m glad to see you made it here all right.”
“Stupid ritual.”
“Totally agree.” She smiled warmly at him. “So this is the entire team?”
“It is,” Bishop confirmed.
“Why are you here?” Zach asked her.
“The same reason as the rest of you. To lend a hand with a difficult situation.”
“Of course.”
She chewed her bottom lip—which struck me as a nervous gesture. It surprised me that she and Zach already knew each other, although I wasn’t sure why. Angels would be associated with each other on some level in Heaven, kind of like going to a big high school. Not everybody knew everyone else, but there were those you saw every day, some you made friends with, some you...didn’t.
I got the strange feeling that these two weren’t exactly best friends.
“Will you be staying with us here at the church?” Zach asked.
Cassandra swept her gaze around the sanctuary, ending with Roth. Her expression soured. “I don’t think so.”
“Oh, come on,” Roth said, grinning darkly. “We can be bunkmates.”
“Definitely not.” She looked at me. “I’ll stay with Samantha.”
I stared at her. “I...uh, I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.”
“Of course it is.”
I cast a look at Bishop, hoping for backup.
There was amusement in his gaze at her suggestion, which didn’t bode well. “I think it’s a good idea. Cassandra can watch over you at night when I’m not around. You’ll be safe from any more...potential problems.”
Kraven snorted again. Honestly, I’d think the demon had a head cold if I didn’t know better. “Right. Wouldn’t want you to have problems, sweetness. That story doesn’t have a happily ever after.”
Bishop shot him a look. “That’s not what I meant.”
The demon waved a dismissive hand. “I wouldn’t know. I barely listen to anything you ever say.”
Don’t fight this, I told myself. Go with the flow. Don’t raise any alarms, not after what happened at Crave.
“Fine,” I said through clenched teeth. “Wouldn’t want to be a problem.”
“Way too late for that,” Roth mumbled.
“Before you go, Cassandra...” Bishop beckoned for her to join him on the other side of the sanctuary. I watched them with a tight feeling in my chest, but I couldn’t hear what they were saying anymore.
Zach moved to stand next to me and he scrubbed a hand through his short, red hair as he also watched the two beautiful angels in their tête-à-tête.
I glanced at him. “So you and Cassandra know each other, huh?”
“Yeah.”
I twisted my index finger into my hair, pulling tight enough to squeeze off my circulation. “I bet when she was human she was, like, a cheerleader. One who stole other girls’ boyfriends. I mean...not that this observation is relevant right now or anything. I’m just saying.”
He grinned at my babblings before the expression faded. “She wasn’t human. She’s one of the hosts.”
I blinked. “One of the what?”
“She was created as an angel.”
I stared at him with shock. “Really?”
He nodded. “Really.”
“Is...is that how it normally is? Or are angels usually human first?”
“They try to keep it balanced.”
“Right. Balance. Can’t forget that.” I worked it over in my head. “How does it happen? Like, do you do enough good deeds in real life and you’re given the job when you die?”
“Pretty much. For me, I saved a kid from drowning. Saved him, but managed to drown myself in the process. I was only a week from graduating from Harvard top of my class. My father always wanted that more than anything—for me to be a lawyer just like him. He was so obsessed with my grades and my...my future. Sometimes I wonder if he’d approve of what I did become.” He glanced at me guiltily. “Sorry, sometimes I still dwell on my past.”
“Dwell away. Believe me, I totally get the parent angst. I’ve lived it all my life.” It was crazy hearing someone talk about their own death, but he said it so matter-of-factly that I found I was able to take it in stride. “When was that? When did you, uh...die?”
“Fifty years ago, give or take. And, yes, I was given the chance when I died to choose between eternal rest or eternal...work.” He shrugged. “I guess I like to keep busy. Never enjoyed taking vacations, anyway. Such a waste of time.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at that, but I quickly sobered. Fifty years ago. And he still looked so young. Wow. “So what happens to your body?”
“We get to keep our human bodies, which are resurrected and healed so they’re even better and stronger than before.” He frowned. “It’s hard to explain if you haven’t experienced it personally. Anyway, our mortal bodies then go through a very intense transition to become celestial and immortal. That part isn’t fun.”
That was when they’d give up their human souls and gain any special abilities as they were transformed into their angelic selves.
In two minutes I’d gotten more information about life as an angel from Zach than I’d gotten from Bishop in two weeks. I was both stunned and grateful for anything I could learn. Now I knew Zach was the go-to guy for stuff like this.
“What about Bishop?” I whispered. “Do you know his story?”
Kraven shot a look at me as he rose from the pew. I wasn’t sure if he was close enough to hear me and Zach talking. He gestured at Roth for them to leave, which they did. I figured they were sick of waiting and they wanted to go patrol. Connor swung into a pew halfway up the aisle.
Zach didn’t speak for a moment. “I’m not sure I want to know his story.”
I tensed. “Why?”
“Heard a few things about him before I left. He wasn’t well liked. There were many who believed he didn’t deserve his placement as an angel.” He shrugged. “I don’t know the truth. All I know is he was a workaholic...really driven. He took every assignment given to him without any argument as if he was trying to prove something. Frankly, I expected him to be a real dick. Maybe the fall knocked a lot of that attitude out of him. But knowing Bishop and Kraven were brothers once...” He sent a look toward the enigmatic angel in question. “I mean, it does make me wonder.”
Me, too. I wondered way too much about the two of them and what it all meant. It had become a driving need inside of me to get to the bottom of the mystery of how and why one brother became a demon and the other an angel.
“Do me a favor, Samantha,” Zach said.
“Sure,” I replied, now distracted. “Of course. What?”
“Don’t fall in love with him.”
My gaze shot to his, and my cheeks immediately heated up. “Excuse me?”
He had the grace to look embarrassed. “Love...well, it makes people do crazy things, even if they’re not crazy to begin with. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
I bit my bottom lip so hard I nearly drew blood. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Cassandra give Bishop a hug.
A freaking hug.
I swallowed hard. “Any other sage advice tonight, Zach?”
“Yeah.” He leaned closer so he could lower his voice to a whisper. “Be careful with Cassandra, too. Hosts are driven by their missions—they take them more seriously than anything else and never question their orders. It’s why they were created—to serve Heaven in any way required. I don’t know why they sent her, but no matter what she might claim, I know it’s for something more than just tagging along on patrol with us.”
It was all he said before Cassandra was there in front of me, ready to leave. I craned my neck to see Bishop again, but she whisked me out of the church before I even had the chance to say goodbye.
Chapter 5
Cassandra had decided to stay with me. At my house. And I seemed to have no choice in the matter.
It made me mad. This wasn’t a friend I wanted to help out. This was an uninvited problem that had barged into my life. If she was just a girl from school I would do my best to avoid her, but she wasn’t.
She might look every bit as harmless as I did, but she was far from it.
I eyed her warily as we walked away from St. Andrew’s and back toward downtown, the outline of the tall office buildings and St. Edward’s Trinity Hospital a glowing beacon in the distance. I drew my coat closer to try to block out the constant chill that made me shiver violently. This was the abandoned part of town, what was once rather industrial, but after the economy tanked a while back, a lot of stores and businesses went bankrupt and shut down. I would definitely think twice about walking around here alone at night—or even with a friend. But Cassandra wasn’t defenseless. She might be blonde and pretty, but she was every bit a warrior as the other guys. Maybe more so.
To tell the truth, she freaked me out.
“You know,” she said after we’d walked in silence for nearly fifteen minutes. “I am getting the distinct impression that you don’t like me very much.”
Unfortunately, I wore my emotions on my face thicker than any makeup.
“You don’t have to be afraid of me,” she added.
I swallowed hard. “I’m not afraid.”
Freaked out wasn’t afraid. It was freaked out.
“If Bishop says you can resist your hungers, then I’m perfectly fine accepting his assessment. To me, you’re the same as any other human. Just a little more interesting.”
“I’m not afraid,” I said again, firmer.
She smiled at that. “If you say so.”
I needed to gain some sort of control here—even if I was only fooling myself. This was going to be a long walk and I’d spent all my bus money on the plate of nachos at the club as well as the cover charge to get in. I’d had no idea I’d be needing to find another way home other than with Sabrina and Kelly.
But here we were. Me hoofing it home on uncomfortable high heels with my new housemate, Cassandra the Perfect Blonde Angel.
“Zach tells me you’re a host,” I said. I was making the assumption it wasn’t a secret. He hadn’t said it was.
She raised an eyebrow. “And do you know what that means?”
Yeah, that I should watch you carefully for your hidden agenda. “You weren’t human first. You were created as an angel.”
“That’s right.”
“That’s hard for me to wrap my head around. No parents. No siblings...not that I have siblings. But, I mean, most people do.” Like Bishop and Kraven, who came immediately and vividly to mind.
She crossed her arms, keeping her gaze on the sidewalk stretching before us. “It’s not as sterile an existence as you might think. I have a sibling—or someone I consider my sibling. She was created at the same time as me. We’re like sisters.”
“Oh.” Yes, that was my fabulously snappy comeback.
There were some people you felt totally comfortable around. Like Carly, for instance. We knew each other so well we could basically finish each other’s sentences. Also, we didn’t have to be constantly talking. It was a comfortable silence.
I didn’t have that with Cassandra. With her it was uncomfortable silence. One that pressed in on all sides like those collapsing rooms in sci-fi movies, threatening to squish the heroine into something the width of a piece of paper.
“Your supernatural intuition has helped the team,” she said. “I’m grateful that Bishop found you.”
“More like the other way around.”
She looked at me with surprise. “You found him?”
I nodded, thinking back to that night—which was wonderful since I’d met Bishop, but also horrible because, well...I’d met Bishop. He represented the best and worst moments of my life, all in such a short time.
“He was having difficulties keeping his thoughts under control.” That was putting it extremely mildly. “Our paths crossed. We realized that when I touched him his mind cleared.”
“Incredible. You must be an asset to the team.”
I shrugged. Kraven’s earlier words echoed in my head: don’t try buttering me up now, Blondie. “I want to help if I can.”
“Now he’s taken to inflicting pain on himself to get the same result.”
I grimaced. “He has to stop that.”
“I agree. It’s barbaric. But I do have to wonder how he realized such a thing would work for him.”
I’d wondered it, too, at first. But I think I’d figured it out.
Bishop must have realized that pain from the dagger helped clear his head when he’d been tortured by the Source of the grays—who just happened to have been my demon aunt, Natalie, my birth father Nathan’s sister. This was another fact that nobody on the team knew but Bishop.
My aunt was anomalous—a demon with a scary glitch created in the conversion from human to infernal being. She had a disturbing taste for human souls and had been branded a problem that needed to be dealt with, especially since souls, both light and dark, were essential to helping keep the universal balance. She was tossed into the Hollow still alive as her punishment. Nathan, too, had an anomaly—according to what Natalie had told me, he could kill with a touch by absorbing life energy.
Seventeen years later, Natalie escaped and arrived here in Trinity. Her strange ability had evolved. Now she was able to create more creatures with her hunger through the “kiss.” And they could do the same. Like a contagious disease. That was why there was a barrier up, so none of us “infected” could spread this disease to the rest of the world. It was an invisible citywide quarantine that would be here till we were all gone.
Natalie had known who I was. And being that I was the daughter of a demon and an angel, she thought that my nexus abilities could help her on her path of destruction and revenge. To do so, she got Stephen to remove my soul in a single kiss. She’d used the metaphor of removing a lid from a box. The soul was the lid keeping my supernatural abilities closed off to me. As soon as it was removed, the contents of this strange and scary box were finally revealed. She’d also promised that she was the only one who could lead me to my birth father, who still existed...somewhere. I figured he was still trapped in the Hollow.
And yet, even though she presented this “upgrade” to me as something good and beneficial, I still had to deal with the hunger of a gray. She’d told me she believed these hungers would fade for me since I wasn’t totally human to begin with.
The evil woman was a liar about many things.
A week had passed since she’d been killed, and, if anything, my hunger was even worse than before.
So Natalie failed. She died before I could learn more information about my birth father’s whereabouts. But before she was killed she’d used Bishop’s dagger to carve him up as duress to get me to do what she wanted. It nearly worked. I’d been very close to doing anything to make her stop torturing Bishop. That must have been when he’d realized that injuries from the dagger would chase away his growing confusion.
“Are you all right?” Cassandra touched my arm, snapping me out of the horrible memory.
“Yeah, fine.” I inhaled shakily and looked up at the sky. It was clear and black and studded with stars. My eyes burned, but I swallowed back my tears.
I tried to put on a brave face, but this was all still very new to me. I’d gone from being a normal high school student trying to keep a high average in order to ensure a bright future—to not knowing if I’d have a future at all.
Fear was not a friend. All it did was weaken me. I couldn’t let myself be weak.
And I flatly refused to be afraid of this angel. I refused to be afraid of my future. I was in control here. I’d find Stephen and everything would be better again. My life would never revert completely to what I’d thought of as normal, but it would give me time to figure everything out. And it would give me a chance to find Carly again. If my aunt had managed to escape from the Hollow, then she damn well could, too.
I needed to change the subject to something more productive. Immediately.
“Can Bishop be helped?” I asked. “He’s not supposed to have fallen. Somebody messed with him. But he gives me the impression this is permanent.”
“There are only a few angels gifted with the ability to burn a new soul into a fallen one. It’s not a process that is typically reversed.”
“But it was a mistake! They have to make an exception for him.”
“I completely agree and I hope that’s what they’ll choose to do.” Her brows drew together. “He’s dealing with these difficulties with admirable grace and strength. He’s rather amazing, isn’t he?”
“Yeah. He is.” I agreed with everything she said, but it still rubbed me the wrong way that she was so impressed by him. I kicked my jealous thoughts into the corner like a pair of dirty socks and tried to ignore them. They weren’t helping. Also, they smelled bad.
We’d finally emerged from the dark and abandoned neighborhood containing the church. This was more populated, more active, with a main road up ahead and lines of restaurants. It wasn’t far from the shopping district known as the Promenade.
Still at least another twenty minutes before we got to my house, though.
I had to keep extra money in my purse for bus fare from now on. Like, seriously. I enjoyed a good walk, the chance to clear my head and get some fresh air, but this was ridiculous.
We passed a couple homeless people sitting with their backs against the fronts of closed-up shops. I scanned their faces quickly, but neither one was the homeless person I’d been searching for.
There was a man named Seth somewhere in this city. Just like Bishop, he was a fallen angel, one who’d fallen a long time ago. I knew he could give insight and help if I introduced him to the team, but I hadn’t seen any sign of him in a week. I’d started to think that maybe he’d just been my imagination.
No, he wasn’t. He was real. Carly had met him, too.
I’ll find you, Seth. I swear I will. I need to talk to you again.
Cassandra slowed to a halt, studying an amorous couple on the side street we’d turned down. The streetlamps cast spooky shadows on the sidewalks and brick walls.
“It’s not polite to stare at people making out,” I told her.
“Is that what they’re doing?”
“Yeah, I mean...” But I stopped talking. At first glance, I’d assumed they were doing just that—two people kissing passionately, so into each other that they ignored the world around them.
But at second glance...
Before I could say anything or do anything, Cassandra walked directly toward the couple and grabbed hold of the man’s arm.
He broke off the kiss and turned to face her. His eyes were black, his skin so pale in the darkness that it seemed luminescent.
He was a gray.
I turned my horrified gaze to his girlfriend—or, victim, rather—who looked just as Colin had earlier. Glazed, dazed, with the telltale black lines branching around her mouth. She collapsed to the ground.
No one but us had witnessed this. We were fifty feet from the main road.
The gray looked to be in his early twenties, and was handsome when his pallor returned to normal and his eyes shifted back to human.
“Can I help you?” he asked calmly, wiping his hand over his mouth to remove traces of his victim’s lipstick.
Cassandra’s hands clenched into tight fists at her sides. “I know what you are.”
“Do you?” He raised an eyebrow at the blonde angel who’d stopped him from continuing his dark kiss.
The girl who’d fallen to the ground wasn’t moving. Her eyes remained glazed, and she wasn’t snapping out of it as Colin thankfully had. The black lines remained around her mouth.
“Oh, God. No,” I whispered.
This gray had taken her entire soul in that kiss, and she hadn’t been strong enough to survive it.
“She’s dead,” I said, louder. My stomach convulsed. “You killed her!”
“Too bad,” he said without emotion. “She was very tasty.”
Cassandra’s eyes flashed with rage. “You’re evil. A plague upon this city. Upon this entire world. You must be destroyed.”
He laughed. “Yeah, good luck with that.”
She didn’t pull out a weapon, but she stalked closer to him. I held my breath, watching, trying not to look at the dead girl again. I hadn’t seen anything like this before. I’d seen the kiss before, I’d been guilty of the kiss myself, but I’d never seen it kill anyone.
This was proof that it could. That what I was, and what I could do—that this ravenous hunger I felt every hour of every day—was one hundred percent evil.
I felt no pity for this gray. Instead, all I felt was rage. I wanted Cassandra to kill him right here and right now. She was a warrior like the others; there was no doubt in my mind about that.
But as she drew closer to him, the gray watched her with open amusement. “You’re one of the people I’ve been hearing about. The ones trying to stop us from having any fun in this town.”
She launched herself at him, her hands out as if prepared to grab his throat and strangle him. But with a flick of his wrist, he backhanded her. It was so hard that she went flying through the air and hit the wall on the opposite side of the street with a violent smacking sound.
Cassandra crumpled to the ground unconscious.
I spun to face the gray, stunned. “What did you—?”
He grinned at me. “Impressed?”
I rushed toward Cassandra and snatched a jagged piece of wood from the side of the road, holding it in front of me.
The gray watched me carefully. “What exactly do you think you’re doing?”
“Defending myself from a killer.” My voice shook.
He laughed. “Seriously? You’re one of us, in case you weren’t aware. I saw you last week with Stephen at Crave.”
Suddenly, I recognized him. He was one of my Aunt Natalie’s minions who’d hung out at the nightclub. This was one of the grays who’d held Bishop in place while Natalie tortured him.
Fear and hatred stormed inside me.
“You’re not supposed to feed!” I held the sharp piece of wood out in front of me like I was a vampire slayer. I wanted to check Cassandra and make sure she was all right, but I knew I couldn’t turn my back on this monster for a second.
“I didn’t. Not for a long time. I tried to follow the rules.”
“Why are you so strong? Grays aren’t any stronger than humans. What are you?”
He studied me without looking the least bit concerned about my impromptu weapon. “You know butterflies start as ugly caterpillars, right?”
My heart pounded so hard I could barely hear over the sound of it. “Is this science class?”
He shrugged. “You need to come with me. We can be friends.”
“I don’t want any more friends. Not like you.” Something occurred to me. My gaze snapped to his. “Where’s Stephen? I need to find him!”
His lips stretched over straight, white teeth. “Come with me and we’ll all have a nice chat.”
Crap. Even the possibility that he knew where to find Stephen was like throwing out tantalizing bread crumbs and then asking me to follow him to the loaf. But I couldn’t trust him.
“No way. Tell me where Stephen is.”
“Nah. Not if you’re hanging around friends like these.” He flicked a glance at Cassandra.
I swallowed hard, not sparing more than a worried glance at the unconscious angel. “Why are you different than other grays?”
“Am I?” He gave me a grin—one of those frustrating ones that showed that he believed he knew something I didn’t know...and he wasn’t talking.
Even from a distance, I felt his evil like thick slime spreading over my skin. He had no remorse about the dead girl lying four feet away from him. Not even a glimmer.
It was as if he had become one of the zombie grays—but he wasn’t mindless. It shouldn’t have been possible.
Whatever he was, it was wrong. Dark. Malicious. He knew right from wrong, yet he’d chosen to destroy someone’s life anyway. He might have control, but he didn’t bother to use it.
When he stepped closer to me I took a shaky step back. Cassandra was in my sightline, but she still wasn’t moving.
“You need to join with the people who understand you,” he said. “Don’t get caught on the wrong side of this tug-of-war.”
“How many are left?” I asked, my voice choked. “How many grays?”
“Have you seen the papers? They’re calling us a kissing mob. A gang of people who randomly kiss strangers. They have no idea what we can really do. What we really are.”
I’d seen it. It was buried in the Trinity Chronicle as an amusing fluff piece on page fifteen. Nobody realized what a threat it was. Nobody realized that the dozens of people who’d gone missing or turned up mysteriously dead in recent weeks—articles that ran much closer to the front of the newspaper—were related. It was a mystery. There were no signs of trauma found on the bodies, apart from the mysterious black lines left around their mouths. Those lines didn’t fade on a dead victim.
“Give that to me before you hurt somebody.” He looked so calm it was maddening.
When he reached for the piece of wood, I slashed it at him, cutting his arm.
He snarled at me. “Bitch!”
This time when he grabbed for my weapon I slashed the palm of his hand. Blood dripped to the ground as pain flashed across his expression.
He whacked me across the face so hard that the makeshift stake flew out of my hand, and hit the wall. White-hot pain momentarily blinded me.
I opened my mouth to scream, but he clamped his hand so tight over my mouth I thought he might break my teeth.
He began to drag me down the street. “I think you need to feed. I can set you up. Your head will get a lot clearer soon. Promise.”
“Let go of me!” My screams were muffled by his hand. I tried to bite him. I fought against him, scratching and clawing, but his bleeding arm may as well have been made of steel. This guy wasn’t human. Not in any way. And he was more than just a gray.
If he shoved me in a small room with a human, based on how I’d dealt with Colin earlier, I wasn’t sure if I was strong enough to resist. Maybe for a little while, but not forever. It would be my worst fear come to life.
Suddenly, Bishop stepped out from behind the corner up ahead. For a moment I thought it was all my imagination, that my brains had been rattled when the gray hit me. But it was true.
He was here.
And he looked mad enough to kill.
Chapter 6
My heart leaped at the sight of him.
Bishop’s gaze was narrowed and dangerously fixed on the gray. “Take your hands off her right now.”
The gray removed his hand from my mouth, instead twisting it painfully into my hair to hold me still. I shrieked. “Is this the rescue party? Go check on the blonde. She’s one of yours. This one...she’s one of mine.”
“Wrong,” I snarled.
Bishop’s eyes flashed bright blue. The dagger was already clenched in his grip. “Roth, check on Cassandra. I’ll handle this.”
Roth, who’d been standing just behind Bishop, moved toward Cassandra just as the gray shoved me away from him. I slammed hard into the wall, knocking my breath away and rattling my bones. I wheezed for a second and struggled to stay on my feet. This time, I tasted blood.
I whirled around to see Bishop charge the gray, dagger in hand. Much better than a piece of sharp wood.
“Be careful!” I yelled.
He wasn’t being very careful. He didn’t hesitate—just as he hadn’t hesitated with Cassandra.
At the last second, the gray brought his foot up to smash Bishop right in the face, knocking him backward. He landed hard on his back, but leaped back up a moment later, shaking himself off.
“Interesting,” Bishop said with a frown. He was now bleeding from a vicious cut on his forehead.
“Good word. Interesting. I’ll take it.” The gray grinned. “And I’ll take the girl when I’m finished with you and your friends. She’ll be happier with her own kind.”
“You can try to take her. You’ll fail.”
“We’ll see.”
Bishop studied him with narrowed eyes. His gaze flicked to the victim lying nearby before grimly returning to the gray. “What are you? I thought you were a gray, but you’re something else.”
“Nope. Just a run of the mill ‘gray.’” He even made sarcastic air quotes as his smile stretched. It was a term made up by Heaven and Hell, not by grays themselves. “Time changes things. By not slaughtering all of us last week, you gave us the time we needed to adapt, to evolve. We’re glad you sent Natalie’s ass back to the Hollow. She was a serious buzzkill.”
“Bishop,” Roth growled. “We need Zach. Her back’s broken.”
I stared at him with horror. I didn’t think a broken back could kill an angel—only being stabbed by the golden dagger could do that—but if she didn’t get healed quickly it could cause serious problems. She could be paralyzed.
Bishop swore under his breath. “Let’s get this over with.”
He stormed toward the gray again, but was deflected. He landed hard on his shoulder this time and I heard a sickening crunch. His dagger skittered across the pavement away from him.
“Bishop!” I yelled, terrified he’d been hurt as badly as Cassandra.
Roth got to his feet and rushed the gray but the gray easily slammed his fist into the demon’s face.
I watched this with sheer disbelief. Grays weren’t supposed to be any stronger or any more dangerous than humans. Except for the kiss.
But this guy...
He’d just taken down two angels and a demon without even breaking a sweat. What was going on here?
Bishop struggled to get to his feet, but the guy slammed his foot down on Bishop’s broken shoulder. Bishop let out a roar of pain and rage.
Without thinking, I started for him, fists clenched.
“Stay back, Samantha,” Bishop snarled. “Don’t get closer.”
My steps faltered. I trembled as I searched the side street, looking for something that might help.
The gray laughed loudly, and then glanced at me. “Ready to go?”
No. But I was ready to kill him. Seeing Bishop hurt had brought something out from deep inside of me—something that saw red and wanted to inflict injury.
But before I could take even another step closer—against Bishop’s wishes—the golden dagger sliced through the air, hitting the gray directly in the chest. He snarled with pain, then yanked it out and threw the now-bloody weapon away from him.
I spun to see who’d thrown it. Zach had arrived and was crouched beside Cassandra. His eyes blazed bright blue in the darkness. Bishop’s weren’t the only eyes that did that; it was an angel thing.
Zach had thrown the knife with perfect aim. And here I thought he was a peaceful angel who saved kids from drowning and could heal injuries.
He was also a deadly warrior when necessary.
For a horrible second I thought the dagger’d had no affect at all on this gray, that along with his super strength, he’d somehow become immortal and omnipotent.
Not the case.
He dropped to his knees. Blood soaked the front of his white shirt. He sent a hate-filled glare in my direction.
“Take a good look,” he growled. “This is your future whether you like it or not. Soon enough, they’ll kill you, too.”
He shuddered, then he fell forward onto the pavement.
There wasn’t even a moment to catch my breath before the Hollow appeared out of nowhere and opened wide.
I’d seen it twice before. Both times it had scared me so much I could barely function.
Seeing a black, swirling vortex appear out of absolutely nowhere wasn’t the most natural sight in the world. It opened like a mouth with a bottomless hunger, ready to take whatever supernatural was in its path. It was triggered by a death, by blood, but it didn’t seem to differentiate between the living and the dead. If you were in its path, then you were in serious trouble.
It was torture to think that Carly was in there somewhere—still alive. And I had no idea how to get her back out again.
The gray was closest. With fingerlike tendrils of living, breathing darkness, the Hollow reached out like a horrible hand and pulled him into the vortex. I swear, it was bigger this time, and stronger, as if all of the supernaturals it had taken had made it gain a few pounds. It shifted as if scanning the area, stopping on me for a brief moment. I swear, the Hollow looked at me. Right at me.
“Carly!” I screamed. “Carly! Where are you?”
Maybe if she could hear me. Maybe...
The horrific swirling gateway began to inch closer to me...nearer and nearer...
But then Bishop grabbed hold of me and tried to drag me back, his teeth clenched with pain from his massive shoulder injury. It was enough to snap me out of my daze. I held on to him tightly. The Hollow wouldn’t hesitate to grab me. It had tried before, and I had the strangest feeling that it was annoyed that it hadn’t succeeded.
“We’ll find Carly,” he shouted, barely loud enough for me to hear him over the roar of the Hollow. “But it won’t be tonight. I’m not losing you like this.”
To my right, I saw a horrific sight. Cassandra’s unconscious body was sliding across the pavement toward the vortex that had moved away from me. It reached for her, black smoky fingers curling around her ankles.
But then seemingly out of nowhere, Roth launched himself through the air, tackling Cassandra, and rolling them both out of range.
With no one left in its sights, the Hollow began to swirl smaller and smaller until it finally, thankfully, disappeared completely. The thunderous sound—like being in the middle of a tornado—vanished like somebody had pressed the off button on a gigantic stereo.
I still clung to Bishop. He pulled back from me, checking my face, my arms, making sure that I wasn’t hurt. His brows were drawn tightly together and his left arm hung slackly at his side.
“Are you okay?” he demanded.
I fought to breathe normally, but I nodded. “Bishop, your shoulder...”
“It’s nothing.”
“It’s shattered.”
“I’ll live. But you...” His gaze moved over my face, his brows tight together. “You’re not seriously hurt.”
“No. But Cassandra is.”
He swore under his breath. Then, with a last searching look, he pushed up off the ground and went to Cassandra’s side.
It was so quick I’d barely had a chance to let the tantalizing scent of his soul affect me. I wished I could say that after what had happened with the gray it didn’t bother me, but it had. My hunger surged forward. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to push it back.
“Can you fix her?” Bishop’s words to Zach were tight. Roth, Zach and Bishop gathered in a circle around Cassandra.
I stayed where I was, a safe distance away, watching tensely.
“I think so.” Zach gently rolled Cassandra over onto her stomach.
I’d experienced something extremely similar nearly two weeks ago when a searchlight had led me to Roth. When he’d been “reborn” after the ritual, he’d immediately sensed I was a gray. And he’d been sent here to kill grays. He quickly and efficiently broke my neck. I’d been only moments away from death when Zach managed to heal me. And I swear, when an angel heals you, it’s as if nothing ever happened. Better than that, really. My neck had honestly never felt so good. Still did. He was like a Heaven-sent chiropractor.
“Cassandra, can you hear us?” Bishop asked, touching her shoulder gently.
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Hold still and let Zach help you.”
“All right. Go ahead.” Her pain-filled eyes narrowed. “And hurry up.”
I couldn’t help but smile shakily at that. The angel was very bossy and it didn’t matter what the situation was. I wondered if all host angels were the same.
Zach pushed her sweater up farther to reveal more of her winged-tattoo-like imprint, identical to Bishop’s and the other angels’. Then he placed his hands on Cassandra’s spine and closed his eyes. His hands began to glow white. Cassandra cried out, and every muscle in my body tensed in sympathy.
I remembered that this felt worse before it felt better—like fire burning straight through your flesh and into your bones.
Finally, Zach returned her sweater to its regular position and helped her to her feet. She wavered unsteadily for a moment, but then got her balance.
“You’re next,” Zach said, before he quickly worked to heal Bishop’s broken shoulder and facial cuts and scrapes.
This was close. Too close. That gray had wanted to crush him into dust right in front of me.
Cassandra looked at Zach. “Thank you.” Then at Bishop. “Both of you.”
Roth cleared his throat. She flicked a glance at him.
“I saved you, sweetheart,” he told her flatly. “You almost got sucked into the Hollow.”
Her expression tightened, but she finally nodded. “Thank you, Roth.”
“Yeah, whatever.” He laughed. “I saved an angel’s ass. Can’t believe it. Good thing you’ve got a nice ass.”
Her cheeks turned red before she looked at me. “I apologize for failing you.”
I stared at her, stunned. “Failing me? He knocked you out cold.”
“It’s unacceptable.” She shook her head, looking angry at herself. “I should have expected—”
“Expected something like that?” Bishop said, crossing his arms over his chest. “You’re not omniscient. You didn’t know. That was different than anything we’ve ever been faced with before.”
“It was horrible.” She let out a shaky sigh and let Bishop put his arm around her shoulders. She leaned into him.
Despite everything we’d just experienced, the sight made my face start to burn. I fought hard not to let my inner flare of jealousy show on the surface. “He knew where Stephen was.”
Bishop’s gaze flicked to mine. “Did you want us to let him live?”
My attention brushed against the dead girl nearby and my throat closed. “No. He was a monster. But I—I don’t understand why he was that strong.”
He let go of Cassandra to come stand right in front of me. I studied the ground, feeling his gaze on me, before I finally looked up to meet it. He raised his hand as if to touch me, but then his hand dropped to his side, clenching into a fist. “I haven’t seen anything like that before. Feeding too much...it must make them very strong just before it destroys their minds.”
“Maybe he was about to change,” Roth said. “Maybe this was the last gasp of strength before he lost himself completely.”
“I’m glad Cassandra will be staying with you,” Bishop said. “She can keep you safe.”
“I’ll do my very best,” Cassandra said softly.
She hadn’t exactly kept me safe a minute ago—or herself, for that matter. That gray would have easily dragged me out of here if Bishop hadn’t shown up. But I couldn’t hold it against her. That gray’s strength had been a surprise to all of us.
“Go home. Get some rest,” Bishop said to me, then turned to Cassandra. “We’ll talk more tomorrow.”
She nodded. “Again, thank you for your assistance. I thought we were on our own.”
“Bishop tends to stalk from a discreet distance,” I said. “You’ll hardly notice him, really.”
His gaze snapped to mine and a smile tugged at his lips. “I’m not stalking you. Never have.”
The smile helped warm me. “Watching from a distance. Secretly observing my every move. I think you might need a dictionary, angel.”
“You’re welcome, by the way.”
My cheeks heated again, for a completely different reason this time. “Thank you.”
Finally, with effort, I tore my gaze from his and began walking away. Cassandra caught up to me a block later. We exchanged a look, and I couldn’t help but notice her expression and mood were much graver than they had been when we’d left the church.
“You okay?” I asked.
She just nodded, keeping her eyes on the path ahead of us.
Even for an angel, being broken and then healed again had to be a traumatic experience. I’d planned to dislike her forever, especially due to her immediate connection with Bishop, but I found I couldn’t after what had happened.
I wasn’t saying I liked her, but despising her for being perfect, blonde and beautiful wasn’t a good enough reason for absolute and immediate dismissal.
I wasn’t positive, but I was pretty sure Bishop followed us back to my house at a discreet distance.
I’d only been kidding before about him being my stalker.
He was definitely my guardian angel.
Chapter 7
So much had happened tonight, it was hard to believe it was only a little after nine o’clock when we finally arrived at the small bungalow I shared with my mother.
Home sweet home. I had to say, just the sight of the familiar house helped calm my nerves. Even considering who was with me.
I’d lived here all my life. Until a couple years ago, it was me, my mother and my father. Since the separation, it was just me and Mom. My father lived in England now. I only saw him rarely. Even the emails had started to come with less frequency than they used to.
It would make me sad if I let myself think about it too much.
“Here we are,” I said, stopping at the end of the driveway. My mother’s car was here. I guess she wasn’t working late tonight. Miracles happen.
Cassandra had been very quiet the rest of the way here, as if lost in her thoughts. Her expression revealed nothing about how she felt about having her back broken by a gray...and now voluntarily sharing a house with another one.
In the silence, I’d found it impossible not to think about that gray’s victim. One moment swept away by a kiss from a sexy stranger, the next feeling your life fading away to nothing. A kiss of death.
She didn’t have a chance.
I swallowed past the thick lump in my throat and tried to focus on something else, anything else. I’d decided to tell my mother that Cassandra was one of my friends from school. That her parents were gone for a few days, and she was afraid to be alone.
Not perfect, but it would do. My mother would believe it. She believed a lot of things without asking too many questions.
I let Cassandra into the house, eyeing her warily as she brushed past me. She studied everything her gaze landed on as if assessing it for a future report. The bamboo blind at the window, the colorful rug by the front door. The framed photos on the walls, which no longer included my father.
My mother pretended not to dwell on the divorce, but I knew it hadn’t been her decision. My father hadn’t moved across the ocean just to work at the London branch of his law firm...he’d moved there to be with a beautiful blonde British intern half his age. He almost never emailed anymore and I couldn’t remember the last time we talked on the phone.
I tried to follow Mom’s lead and not dwell on things like that. But it made me understand my mother’s angst.
The sight of empty wine bottles lined up to go into the recycling bin made me wince. Cassandra didn’t seem to notice, but I did. There were way more this week than usual. And there were usually too many.
I wasn’t the only one in the family with a growing addiction to something unhealthy.
“Sam, I’m glad you’re home,” my mother greeted me warmly as we entered the living room. I wasn’t surprised to see that she held a large glass of white wine. On her lap was a stack of papers she was going through. She was a real-estate agent, a job she was good at and put long hours into, seven days a week. I used to complain—to myself, to her, to anyone who’d listen—about how obsessed she was with the job and making money and how she had no time for me.
Since I’d learned I was adopted, she’d tried very hard to mend our shaky relationship by making sure we spent a little time together every day. She assured me that she was a great listener if I had any problems, and that she was here for me, no matter what. And yet, there were more wine bottles by the door than usual.
Stress showed itself in different ways.
I was on edge, but knew I had to hold it together. This was the one place I could still feel like myself. Home was my touchstone for being normal.
And now there was an angel here—one who’d never even been human before. There was nothing normal about that. My mother’s gaze moved to her as she entered the room.
“Hi, Mom,” I said, clearing my throat. “This is Cassandra. She’s a friend of mine.”
“A pleasure to meet you, Cassandra. Call me Eleanor.” My mother got up from her chair and came over to shake Cassandra’s hand. There was a genuine smile on her face. “I’m so glad Sam’s hanging out with new friends. After what happened with Carly, I know the past week’s been rough.”
My eyes started to sting immediately at the mention of my best friend. Mom was one of the people who believed in the “running away with a boyfriend” story. Most brushed it off as the act of a rebellious teenager. But Mom has seen me cry over this and she knew I was taking Carly’s absence hard. She thought I saw it as a betrayal of our friendship.
She was wrong. It was a tragedy.
“Nice to meet you, too,” Cassandra said. “You have a lovely home.”
“Thank you.”
Well, weren’t we all pleasant and polite?
“I, um, need to ask a favor...” I began, ready to launch into my cover story. But Cassandra took over for me before I said another word. She still held my mother’s hand and she looked deep into her eyes.
“I’m going to be staying here with you and Samantha for a little while, Eleanor,” she said smoothly. “It’s nothing to concern yourself with. Do you understand?”
My mother nodded slowly. “I understand.”
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Cassandra was using angelic influence to mess with my mother’s mind. Zach and Connor could do the same thing, but only in emergencies.
“Are you girls hungry?” my mother asked, taking a quick sip of her wine. “I got home late and haven’t had dinner yet. I mean, I know Sam’s hungry. She’s always hungry lately. I’m shocked she’s remained so skinny with the way she eats.”
This just got better and better.
“Yes.” The angel put a hand on her stomach and cocked her head as if trying to sense her bodily needs. “I believe I am hungry.”
“I’ll order some Chinese delivery.”
“Delightful.” Cassandra took a seat in a La-Z-Boy recliner and leaned forward to flip absently through today’s paper. “Eleanor, you say that Samantha is hungry lately. What does she eat?”
I tensed at the question, and the meaning behind it. Just because she’d also given me a pass as a gray didn’t mean that she was finished investigating me. I learned over. “Not what you might be thinking.”
No souls, thank you. Well, except for Colin’s earlier. And Bishop’s last week.
I could try to convince myself that they didn’t really count. I hadn’t hurt them—it had only been tiny nibbles. But it was still wrong.
However, compared to the murderous gray we’d been faced with tonight...
The thought of the glazed eyes of the dead girl with the black lines around her mouth made my blood run cold.
“You name it, she eats it.” My mother fought against her grin, but lost. “I can barely keep the fridge stocked anymore.”
I gave her a look. “You’re so funny I forgot to laugh.”
“Better keep a lid on it if you can. I might need to save my grocery money to pay for other necessities.” Since she was still grinning, I assumed she was trying to be funny. She shouldn’t give up her day job to become a comedian. “I’m having trouble selling a house I thought would go quickly. It’s on the east side right near the city line. Huge piece of property that’s been abandoned for months. Worth two million.”
“What’s the problem with it?” I asked absently.
Cassandra continued to scan the newspaper, and then picked up the TV Guide to flip through it as if fascinated. If she’d never left Heaven before I suppose all of this was new to her.
“There’s a rumor circulating that it’s haunted.” She pulled her cell phone from her Coach bag. “Which is ridiculous. It seems perfectly normal to me.”
“No mournful moans or rattling of chains?”
“Nothing. Although, with it being Halloween in a few days, you’d think that might be a selling feature.” She laughed at this, then left the room to call the Chinese restaurant.
Ghosts in abandoned houses. I wondered if that was even possible—if ghosts really existed.
Not my problem. I had enough to worry about without adding to the list.
When the food arrived, and the house began smelling like Chinese food—which was, in a word, divine—Cassandra had a big grin on her face.
“My first meal here,” she told me. “It’s incredible.”
My mother gave her a strange look. “You kids and your diets.”
Cassandra scanned the dishes as I piled a plate for myself high with food. “What is that? A ball of chicken? Ingenious!”
Later, Cassandra gleefully experienced an hour of television, while I could barely sit still. I wasn’t sure what I should do right now, but I felt like sitting here doing nothing was an incredible waste of time. That gray tonight reminded me how much trouble I was in.
I wouldn’t become like that. I wouldn’t lose my mind again like I had with Colin. I wouldn’t hurt anybody.
I had this under control.
Stephen was still somewhere in this city. I would find him. And he would damn well give me back my soul before it was too late. My future was still bright and sparkly.
Well, maybe not sparkly. But definitely bright.
When it was time for bed, my mother showed Cassandra the upstairs guest room where she’d be staying.
“Thank you, it’s perfect,” Cassandra said, putting a hand on her arm. “Listen, I’ve been thinking about this all night, Eleanor. I’d like you to do something for me.”
“What?”
She gazed into my mother’s eyes. “I think you should go on vacation somewhere really nice. You can leave tomorrow morning. Any work you have can wait until you get back. Do you understand?”
I gaped at her, stunned silent that she was using angelic influence on my mother again.
“Yes, I understand.” My mother nodded. “My goodness, a vacation. What a wonderful idea! It’s been so long—I don’t think I can even remember the last vacation I took. I think it was Florida, four years ago. Remember that, Sam?”
“I...uh, remember. But...are you sure this is a good idea? A vacation right now?”
“No, it’s not a good idea.” She stroked her honey-blond hair back from her face. Her eyes sparkled. “It’s a great idea! I’m going to Hawaii. I’ve always wanted to go there. I’ll take a surfing lesson...and lie on the beach and read a book. Thank you, Cassandra. Such a wonderful suggestion. Will you be all right here without me?”
Cassandra nodded. “We’ll be fine.”
“I’m going to go pack!” My mother kissed me on my cheek, then hurried off in the direction of her bedroom. I waited for her door to close before I spun around to face the angel.
“Just who do you think you are?”
Her eyebrows went up. “Excuse me?”
“You think you can just influence people to do whatever you want them to do? Like it’s nothing?” Every decision that had been made, taken out of my hands, forced upon me—this was the final straw. I wasn’t just going to smile and nod and try to be easy to get along with so nobody saw me as a threat. This was totally unacceptable.
She looked at me as if confused by my reaction. “It’s better this way. Having her here puts her in danger. You must realize that, don’t you?”
Of course I realized that. I wasn’t stupid. “I’m not saying you’re wrong.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“It’s just...not cool,” I sputtered. “You’re new around here—a guest! And this is my house...and my mother! You don’t get to make the rules!” I turned away and went to my room, slamming the door behind me.
Immediately, I felt like a petulant child who’d just thrown a temper tantrum. But I couldn’t help it. I tried to be on my best behavior and fit in, to not make any trouble, even when my life was falling apart. But she’d pushed me too far.
Cassandra had succeeded in making me feel utterly powerless. And that, in turn, made me realize I had no control over anything in my life.
I sank to the floor next to my bed and pulled my knees close to my chest. The three full plates of Chinese food I’d eaten sat heavily in my stomach, threatening to come back up.
Cassandra pushed open my bedroom door a couple minutes later. It wasn’t a big surprise that she didn’t knock first.
I looked up at her, guarded. “What do you want now?”
She pressed her hand against the door frame and looked awkward about coming all the way into my room. Again, her assessing gaze swept over my furniture, my vanity, my discarded clothes that hadn’t hit the hamper. I might get straight As, but I wasn’t what anyone would describe as the neatest person in the world.
“It’s been a difficult evening,” she said. “For you, for me. For all of us. I also sensed a dynamic between you and the other members of the team that perhaps I’ve disrupted in some way.”
I stared up at her, trying to process the strange way she spoke. “You’re a bit of a Vulcan, aren’t you?”
She looked confused. “A...what?”
“A Vulcan. It’s a Star Trek thing. Emotionless aliens who like to talk very proper.”
Her frown deepened. “I’m not an alien. I’m an angel.”
I sighed. “An angel who’s never had a chicken ball before.”
“Which was delicious. And the red dippable goo they came with?” She beamed. “Amazing.”
“If you say so.”
She came all the way into my room and sat on the edge of my bed. She looked at me very seriously. “I know you don’t like me.”
“I never said that.” Not in front of her, anyway.
Her shoulders sank. “That gray this evening. He hurt me...and he hurt you. I thought I could handle it, but he defeated me easily. Too easily.”
“It wasn’t your fault. Grays aren’t normally like that. He was a total freak of nature.” One that scared the hell out of me, to say the least. I was glad he was dead and he couldn’t hurt anyone else.
“That demon had to save me.” She shuddered. “And he said I have a nice ass. How crude.”
“That’s Roth.”
“Is he...” Her brows drew together “...as horrible as he seems?”
I was about to agree with that statement wholeheartedly, but then I thought about it. “I don’t know. Demons are supposed to be evil and horrible. I don’t like him. He’s a jerk, but he’s part of the team. He’s doing his thing. And he did save your butt.” I thought about what little I knew about Kraven. “Demons who’ve been humans before...they have stories behind them. They’re not a hundred percent bad. At least, I don’t think they are. I mean, I guess they did some really bad stuff when they were alive in order to become a demon. Right?”
“I’m sure they did.”
I remembered Zach’s story about the good deed with the drowning kid, and that giving him the chance to become an angel. I figured it would be the exact opposite—a bad deed—to become a demon. “It’s bizarre, really. Because, as far as I’m concerned, demons should be totally evil to the core.”
That was one of the things that freaked me out the most. How you couldn’t tell who was a demon and who was an angel. How similar they looked. Only their imprints confirmed what they really were.
“In the beginning,” I continued, “I assumed Bishop was a demon by the way he handled that dagger of his.”
“Yes, he does have a way with the Hallowed Blade.”
My ears perked up at this name. She’d called it that before. “Is that what it’s called?”
She nodded gravely. “All angels of death are assigned one.”
I blinked. “Angel of...what?”
She glanced down at me sprawled on the floor. “Angel of death. Bishop is one of Heaven’s assassins, which is why he’s one of the few officially authorized to carry such a dangerous blade.”
“Oh.” I could barely find my voice.
“Didn’t you know this about him?”
“No. It—it hadn’t come up.” It was a whisper. I couldn’t manage much more than that. A piece of information like this was enough to knock the breath right out of me.
“That’s why he was chosen to lead this mission. His record shows that he doesn’t hesitate when it comes to—”
“Killing,” I finished for her, feeling sick inside. “The ritual...and dealing with the grays...”
She nodded. “If his departure hadn’t been tampered with, I have no doubt that the grays would all be...” She trailed off and looked at me sheepishly. “Of course, I’m sure an exception would still be made for those who don’t feed and whose souls still exist intact. Somewhere. He wouldn’t have just killed you indiscriminately just because you’re, well...one of them.”
I swallowed hard. “I hope you’re right.”
Bishop’s mission here in Trinity required someone with the right instincts. No hesitation. It had always made my blood turn to ice, seeing him at work. That determined, emotionless expression that came over his face just before the blade met its mark.
I’d known Bishop was dangerous, but...an actual angel of death?
Holy hell.
“I should rest.” Cassandra stood up and moved toward the door. “Tomorrow I need to get a fresh start.”
“Cassandra...” I said, my voice still barely audible. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course. What?”
I took a deep breath and looked right at her. “What’s the real reason you were sent here?”
A shaky smile formed on her lips. “I’m here to lend a hand to the team during this difficult mission. Why else? Good night, Samantha.”
“Good night.”
She left, but not before I’d managed to get a small glimpse of her thoughts. It was another one of my newly uncovered talents. I could read a demon or angel’s mind...if they weren’t actively trying to block me. All I had to do was look into their eyes and concentrate hard.
Cassandra lied. She wasn’t here just to help the team. She had her own mission, an entirely separate one.
I really wished I knew what it was.
* * *
It took me hours before I finally drifted off to sleep. My head was a horrific mass of nightmares about evil grays and dead girls, before they finally parted for something much more pleasant.
A dream about Bishop.
He was seated across from me at a small wooden table in the middle of a wasteland—a cracked, dry desert that stretched as far as the eye could see. There was nothing in sight to the horizons all around us. The sky was a flat, pale gray, like a coating of paint.
“Where are we?” I asked.
“Good question.” He wore black. Black jeans, black T-shirt. The darkness only made the color of his eyes stand out more—like sapphires.
What Cassandra had told me about his job in Heaven was so far in the distance now I couldn’t remember the details. I knew it had disturbed me, but at the moment it was the last thing on my mind. All I felt was happy. Happy to see him. Happy we were alone—no matter where this was. “I’m dreaming right now, aren’t I?”
“You are.” He smiled—an easy smile that made my heart do an automatic flip.
“So this isn’t real? Not some sort of mind meld?”
“No. Just a dream. Your dream.”
I looked down at myself to see I wore a fancy red dress, gauzy and big and silky, like a ball gown. I’d never worn anything so extravagant in my entire life.
“You’re beautiful,” Bishop said.
My gaze snapped to his. “It’s just the dress. It’s not me.”
“You’re wrong. It is you.” There was something in his eyes that made me believe he meant it. “I wish I could kiss you right now.”
“You can kiss me here.” If this was just a dream, then nothing I said or did counted. I liked the idea of that—total freedom. “Normally in my dreams...we do more than just kiss.”
His brows went up. “Really.”
I nodded, fighting a smile.
“You want to do more than just kiss me, Samantha?”
“Maybe I do.” My heart pounded. The endless bravery I normally had in my dreams seemed to be escaping like sand sliding through my fingers. “But there’s a problem.”
“What?”
“There’s a severe balance of power missing in this...whatever this is between us. I know hardly anything about you. You know everything about me. I have no power over you at all.”
“Wrong. You took part of my soul. You know I’m drawn to you like nothing I can control, which is why I’ve tried—and failed—to stay away. Even when I do keep my distance you can still see through my eyes whenever you want to.”
This was another little skill I had. After I’d kissed Bishop and taken part of his soul, there were the odd times I got flashes of what he saw—even if we were nowhere close to each other. I couldn’t read his mind or feel his emotions, but I could see through his eyes.
“It’s not whenever I want to,” I said. “It’s totally random.”
“You underestimate yourself. Your power. But I’m not surprised. This game has barely begun.”
“Game?” I frowned. But then my gaze moved to the table between us. I hadn’t even noticed what was on it before. It was a chess board with white and black pieces. “Are we playing a game?”
“We seem to be.”
The pieces were already in play, not all lined up at the edges. Bishop was playing the white pieces, and I was playing the black ones. He’d already taken one of my pawns. “But I don’t even know how to play chess.”
“Then you need to learn. And you need to learn fast.”
The next moment, he stood up and swept the board off the table. The pieces went flying in every direction.
I got to my feet, alarmed. “Bishop, what are you—?”
He didn’t let me finish my sentence. He grabbed the front of my dress and pulled me toward him, crushing his mouth against mine.
My thoughts fell away as he kissed me—and I kissed him back. Now this was more like my normal dreams about Bishop. Passionate, reckless, total abandon. Incredible.
No hunger to ruin the moment. No ravenous need to devour his soul.
Just his lips against mine with no consequences. No punishment. Only pleasure.
When our lips finally parted and I opened my eyes, there was a coldness in his gaze that betrayed the scorching heat of the kiss.
Cold as ice. It was the look he normally got just before he—
I gasped as he sliced the dagger into my chest. I scrambled back from him, collapsing to the ground. Grasping for the hilt, I pulled it out with a pained cry. My blood was difficult to see against the red dress, but it flowed, pulsing out with every beat of my heart.
I gasped for breath. “I trusted you.”
“No, you didn’t.” He stared down at me sprawled on the cracked, dry ground. His dark brows were drawn tightly together. “You never did.”
I fell all the way backward, struggling to keep breathing. All I could manage was a small shriek when Cassandra appeared behind Bishop. He didn’t see her.
He didn’t see the golden dagger in her hand.
She slashed it across his throat in one smooth, violent motion. His hands flew to the wound as the blood began to gush. A moment later, he fell to my side.
The roaring vortex of the Hollow opened up—even here. It was the last thing I saw before I died.
And the last thing I felt was Bishop grasping hold of my hand.
* * *
I woke up, gasping for breath. My sheets were soaked with sweat. I felt the strong urge to bolt from my bed and start running as fast as I could somewhere, anywhere. But I forced myself to stay right where I was.
Bishop was an angel of death. One of Heaven’s assassins.
Cassandra hadn’t been lying when she’d told me this. I believed her. This piece of the puzzle fit really well, even if it revealed a terrifying picture.
He’d killed me in my dream tonight.
It was what I feared would happen in reality, no matter how much I tried to deny it, even to myself.
But I was different. Bishop and me—we were connected on a deeper level. Even though I didn’t know anything about his life before he became an angel, or his life as an angel, I had to trust my gut when it came to him. And my heart.
Because I did trust him.
Heart and gut didn’t lie—at least, not at the same time.
They didn’t.
Chapter 8
I might be seventeen years old, but watching my mother leave for the airport in a taxi still made me choke up like a little kid.
“Call me if there are any problems.” She gave me a big hug in the driveway. I clung tight to her before finally letting go. “I’m sure you and Cassandra will be fine here without me, but no parties, okay?”
I just nodded, my throat tight.
I hadn’t said a word to try to stop her. Even though I hated how Cassandra had magically coerced her to leave town, I knew it was for the best. She’d be safer away from here for a week. And she was so excited about the trip, how could I spoil it for her?
There had always been something stopping her from taking this dream vacation. A husband who didn’t like to travel (unless it was permanent, and in the direction of his new girlfriend), a kid who always had anxiety attacks on airplanes (that was me—I hate being trapped in small spaces, especially three miles above the ground), and then a job that barely allowed her any time off.
So I was happy for her. Really.
But standing there, watching the taxi drive away down the street, the realization that I was really alone sank in deep. Even though we didn’t always get along so well, she represented my normal life. And soon she’d be five thousand miles away.
“I need to go,” Cassandra told me after I went back inside, out of the cold, and ate a big breakfast of eggs, toast and Pop-Tarts. She gleefully had some cold Chinese food and more red goo.
She wore clothes she’d borrowed from me this morning. Just because an angel arrived ready to do her mission—whatever that mission really was—didn’t mean she packed a bag. Even though she was a few inches taller than me, and had a bigger chest, my clothes looked good on her. It was annoying how good they looked, really.
“To the church?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“I’ll come with you.” I had to get out of here. I couldn’t keep dwelling on what was wrong with my life—I had to do something to fix it. Also, I needed to see Bishop. I wanted to ask him about what Cassandra told me—him being an angel of death. I wanted to know why he’d never told me this before. Maybe that could help stop nightmares like the one last night.
“No, I think it’s best that you stay here.” She put her dishes in the sink. “Let the professionals handle this problem.”
I blanched. “You think I’d get in the way?”
“I just think it would be safer if you stayed here. Take the day to rest and reflect. I’ll let you know if we learn anything.”
“Rest and reflect?” I repeated, dumbfounded.
“Exactly. Have a lovely day.” Without another word she was gone, out the front door. I watched through the kitchen window as she walked down the driveway and disappeared around the corner.
Rest and reflect? Seriously?
Needless to say, there was very little resting. Lots of reflecting, though, as I thought and overthought everything over the next couple of hours.
Even without being around anyone to trigger my hunger, I still felt it pushing in at the edges, gnawing on my control like a dog with a bone. Taking part of Colin’s soul last night had barely satisfied me for a couple hours.
It scared me—especially with too much time to think and nobody around to distract me.
I flipped through the newspaper only to see another article about two more mysterious deaths in the city. Police were stumped. There was no cause of death that could be determined, no sign of murder or disease. It was as if the victims had just stopped living. The only clue that the deaths were connected was the strange black lines around their mouths.
I forced myself to stop reading the article and flipped to another about three teens who’d committed suicide on Friday night. They didn’t go to my school and I didn’t recognize the names, but it also sent a chill through me.
There was no good news in Trinity to be found today, it would seem. It wasn’t just me who was in trouble in this city. Everybody—even those not touched by the supernatural—was at risk.
Studying was my strong point. It got me good grades. It should be able to help me get the answers I needed to help myself and other people at risk right now. I went on the internet and searched for more information about nexi, the spawn of angels and demons.
I found nothing helpful. At all.
After a full half hour of staring at the screen, a scream of frustration rose in my throat, but I forced it back down and tried to think rationally. Who my birth parents were was something I had no control over. I needed to refocus my energy and attention on what I could control: my goal of finding Stephen and retrieving my soul. I’d deal with what it meant to be a nexus after I did everything I could to fix my immediate problems, lose my hunger and have the chance to be close to Bishop (or anyone else, for that matter) without...difficulties.
I grabbed the landline to call Stephen’s house, which was only two doors down from my own. My cell phone had taken up permanent residence in my nightstand drawer. Grays had a weird supernatural vibe that messed with the signal and made phones like that completely useless to me.
His mother picked up. I shakily asked if she’d heard from him lately and where he might be. She had no information for me—and yet again, she said she was sorry. This wasn’t the first call I’d made to the Keyes residence in the last week. I’m sure his mother thought I was obsessed with her son. I was. But not for the reason she might think.
Discouraged, I hung up after saying a hurried goodbye. I stood in the center of my bedroom, my fists clenched at my sides, feeling utterly helpless and alone.
I hated feeling that I had no control over my life anymore.
Cassandra told me to stay home and let the “professionals” handle this. Well, I’d decided I wholeheartedly disagreed. I would go to the church and get my answers, even if it was just to grill Bishop about his mysterious past.
Just as I’d pulled my coat on and started for the front door, the phone rang. I almost ignored it, but something drove me to pick it up.
I picked up the phone. “Hello?”
“Samantha.”
I froze. He’d only said my name, but I knew the voice. My grip on the receiver tightened. “Stephen?”
“I need to talk to you.”
My words tripped over themselves in a hurry to escape my mouth. “Where’s my soul? Where’s Carly’s soul?”
“I have to see you in person.” There was a short hesitation. “Look, I know you hate me...”
I had to slump down in the nearest chair since my legs gave out. “I just want to be normal again.” The words bubbled up my throat before I could hold them back. I knew very well that it couldn’t ever happen. Even if I wasn’t a gray, being the secret daughter of an angel and a demon had made me abnormal from the day I was born. It didn’t matter that I’d only recently learned the truth.
“Meet me at the Trinity Mall,” he said. “On the fourth floor by the railing. It’s busy there today so you don’t have to worry about me doing anything threatening, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”
I stood up and pressed my back against the wall for support. “Everything about you is threatening, Stephen.”
“Don’t bring one of your new friends.”
“Why wouldn’t I bring all of them? You’re the bad guy here, remember?”
“I’m not as bad as you might think. We’re the same. We should be on the same side.”
My grip tightened on the phone. “I’m on my own side. Nobody else’s.”
“Then you should want all the information you can get about what’s to come. Meet me there in an hour.”
He hung up.
I stared at the phone before I finally placed it back on its base.
I’d been searching for him for a week and had come up with nothing but air. If Stephen didn’t want to be found, then he wouldn’t be found. But now he wanted to talk to me.
On his terms.
My first instinct was to find Bishop, but if Stephen saw him with me I knew he’d leave and I’d never see him again.
I had to get my soul back on my own. Put the lid back on this box and keep it there. Then I’d be able to leave the city again, get past the barrier. Other people’s souls—including Bishop’s—wouldn’t drive me crazy with hunger. Everything would be better.
I could still fix this.
* * *
The Trinity Mall. Not my favorite place in the city.
Over three hundred stores on four levels, it was a shopping mall slash tourist destination. Trinity was huge enough to have a few malls, but this was the crown jewel right in the heart of downtown. I used to love coming here with Carly, shopping for hours on end, and having lunch in the food court downstairs, back when we both had regular-size appetites. We’d still gorge on the food—hamburgers, Chinese food, souvlaki, French fries, you name it. She’d complain about her slow metabolism and grumble about how I never gained a pound. I’d tell her she looked fine—because she always did whether she realized it or not. I should have told her how much I envied her curves.
But then I ran into some trouble here. After my parents’ divorce was finalized six months ago, I went on a bit of a shoplifting spree. Or, as my guidance counselor put it, “a cry for attention.”
It was never much, just enough to give me a rush of excitement that I was getting away with something. That I wasn’t being perfect, or good, or coloring inside the lines like everyone had told me to all my life. Instead of focusing on being a perfect student and getting all As, I got a lipstick. A scarf. A leather wallet. I knew it was wrong even as I shoved them in my pocket or under my shirt. I didn’t try to justify it as something I needed that I couldn’t afford. I could afford it. My father felt enough guilt over the divorce and his move across the ocean that my monthly allowance, written on checks with his gold-stamped law firm logo in the corner, were so big I didn’t even need to apply for part-time jobs. I mean, I couldn’t buy a car or anything major, but for the necessities of life, I could get what I needed.
Getting caught had been mortifying in so many ways. No charges were laid, but my humiliation was witnessed by several kids from school. The cop had been a jerk to me, treating me like a total juvie and a spoiled brat. I’d sat in the back of a cop car for an hour, and only through sheer will had I avoided having the anxiety attack I always got in enclosed spaces. I’d closed my eyes and breathed in and out, pretending to be somewhere, anywhere else.
My penance for my short life of crime was to do some community service. I worked in the kitchen at a local mission and had the chance to interact with people who really had it bad while I had never appreciated how good I had it. I had a home, a roof over my head and a mother who loved me. I’d met homeless people who had nothing and nobody.
It was the most important lesson of my life. Be grateful for what you have, since it can be taken away at any time. Sometimes fate steps in to pull the rug from beneath your feet whether you’re prepared or not—and we all fall differently.
I now regretted my month of shoplifting, and not just because I’d been caught. I knew it was wrong and I’d done it for stupid reasons. Not that there was ever a good reason to steal.
But I still hated this mall. I usually shopped at the one on the north side of the city. Took longer to get there, but at least the floors weren’t tiled with my shame.
Past Macy’s and a lineup of other stores that at one time would have been calling my name were the escalators up to the fourth floor. I wasn’t a fan of the elevators due to my claustrophobia. I didn’t even like wearing turtlenecks.
At the moment, I didn’t need any more anxiety than I already had.
The railing curved in a circle around the open center of the fourth floor and looked down into the main floor food court a hundred feet below. A massive chandelier of crystal birds hung from the glass ceiling, a piece by some artist that had cost a ton of money when the mall opened twenty years ago. When the sun from the skylights hit it just right—it was magic.
I gripped the railing and gazed down nervously at the food court. Despite my big breakfast, my stomach grumbled. Sundays were a busy day at the mall. There were thousands of people here, and I swear I sensed the press, the heat and the scent of every one of their souls.
I couldn’t stay here for very long. Already, I felt the need to escape.
“You’re here.”
Stephen’s voice bit through my concentration and I tensed, turning slowly to see him leaning against the railing six feet to my left.
This was real. He was here. I’d finally found him.
Or, rather, he’d found me.
Stay calm.
But that was a losing proposition. I couldn’t be calm around Stephen Keyes.
A very short time ago I thought he was the hottest guy I’d ever seen, in Trinity or anywhere else. Black hair, cinnamon-colored eyes with a slight exotic slant to them thanks to his Hawaiian-born mother.
Stephen only dated the most beautiful girls. I never expected to be one of them. I preferred to admire him from afar and keep my heart safe from being trampled on. But...then he kissed me. And he’d hurt more than just my heart.
For a fleeting moment, I’d honestly thought the boy I’d always had a crush on had been into me. Instead, he’d been on assignment for my aunt to remove my soul and free my nexus abilities so they could be used for her gain.
I had no interest in someone like Stephen who would lie to me, use me and steal something so valuable from me. And I never would again. While Bishop had sworn to help me, and I did believe he meant it despite my many doubts and questions about him, the only person I completely trusted was the one I saw in the mirror.
My grip on the railing tightened painfully as a group of teens moved past, way too close, the scent of their souls brushing into my orbit of hunger.
“So here we are,” Stephen said.
“That’s close enough,” I said when he got four feet away.
He stopped. “I’m not planning to hurt you. I’m not the one who carries around a sharp golden dagger, remember?”
“No, you’re the one who helped my aunt nearly kill me.”
“I don’t think she would have killed you.” There were dark shadows under his eyes, which made it look as if he hadn’t slept in days. I’d noticed the same circles under my eyes this morning, thanks to my nightmare-induced tossing and turning. “Besides, she’s gone.”
A stomach-churning image of the Hollow grabbing hold of my aunt after Carly had stabbed her with Bishop’s dagger flashed through my mind. “Are you upset about that?”
He gave me a grim look. “No.”
I didn’t want to take my attention off him in case he disappeared in a puff of smoke. This is what I’d wanted. I’d searched the city for him for a week and now he was standing right in front of me. “I don’t want to talk about my aunt, Stephen. I’m here for one reason and one reason only.”
“Your soul.”
“And Carly’s. Give them back to me.”
He looked down at the food court, his jaw tight. “Look at all of them. It’s hard to believe they have no idea what’s happening in Trinity right now. Right in front of their eyes. Humans.” He said it with barely contained disgust.
He was trying to change the subject. I had to stay calm and not make any huge demands. He had all the power here, but I didn’t want him to know that. “You’re human.”
“I was.”
“Now you think you’re more than that?”
He didn’t answer my question. His gaze flicked to me. “You were already more than human before this.”
I tried not to grimace. He knew I was a nexus, thanks to Natalie. My little secret that nobody was supposed to know. “Other than the hunger, I don’t feel any different than before.”
Stephen studied my face, as if searching for some clue there. “You will.”
I still gripped the railing as if it was the only thing keeping me from tumbling over. “No, I won’t.”
He shook his head. “Things are changing...ever since Natalie’s been gone.”
“Is this another recruitment speech or a warning?”
He snorted a little, and I could have sworn he looked a bit nauseous.
I frowned. “Are you all right?”
That earned me another dry laugh. “Do you really care about my well-being, Samantha?”
My hands were sweating as I forced myself to stay calm and not start shrieking demands. “You wanted to talk to me. So talk. What’s changing?”
He kept his eyes forward, not looking directly at me. “It wasn’t like this when Natalie was still around.”
“What?”
“It starts with the cold. Like...worse than normal. Worse than the cold we feel from not having a soul. And the hunger...” His expression tightened. “You can’t ignore it even if you try. It’s there...a constant need that doesn’t leave for a second, driving you to feed from someone...anyone. And it doesn’t get satisfied when you give in to it...it—it just gets worse.”
I think I stopped breathing. This wasn’t what I’d expected him to say—not at all. “What are you talking about?”
He swallowed, and when his gaze met mine I swear I saw fear there. “Stasis.”
I shook my head. “What’s stasis?”
When he wrenched his gaze from the food court to look at me again, there was something in his eyes that scared me. Something bleak and defeated.
Stephen was afraid.
This realization chilled me right down to my bones.
“Feeding—kissing someone—it makes you feel better for a little while. But...it doesn’t stop what’s going to happen. We’re changing, Samantha. You will, too. We lose our minds, our control. Everything.”
I started to tremble. He was talking about the zombie grays. “But—but that’s what happens to the grays that feed too much. Natalie warned us to control ourselves or we’ll end up like that. But if we don’t feed, it won’t happen. Right?”
“It’s different now. She didn’t know. We go into that state and...then we come back out again. That mindlessness, it’s only the beginning.” He didn’t say it like it was a good thing.
I stared at him, trying to understand, but then with a sickening feeling it all clicked into place for me. “Oh, God. The gray from last night...”
“What?”
“He was different.” My words were barely audible. I tensed up as more people closely brushed past us. “He—he was stronger, more powerful, and...and evil. Like, he had no...” I gritted my teeth before I managed to continue. “Like he had no soul.”
Stephen didn’t mock me and tell me this was a stupid thing to say—that of course a gray had no soul. Instead, his expression only grew more grave. “That’s right. Any morals, any compassion we have left—after stasis, it’s gone. Stripped. Soulless, completely and totally.”
I took this in and worked the disturbing information over in my head. “I thought you were already like that.”
He let out a humorless snort. “I’ve changed from how I was before, but not completely. Not like what I’ve seen in the past few days.”
I clasped my hands tightly to keep them from shaking. “So this guy—he was one of the zombies, and then he...then he came back from that?”
He nodded.
I couldn’t speak for a full minute, just staring at him. “Why are you telling me this? Why did you want to meet me here?”
He looked at me steadily. “Because it’s my fault you’re like this. I wanted to warn you.”
There was a big part of Stephen that had been changed forever by becoming a gray, one that could be manipulated by Natalie to do bad things on her behalf—but he wasn’t completely changed yet. There was still some part of him that remained the same Stephen that I’d had a crush on.
He was afraid of what was to come. For himself...and for me.
I fought to find the words to speak. “How long before it happens?”
He didn’t speak for a moment. “All I know is—it’s coming, Samantha. And I don’t know how it’ll go for me.”
My stomach clenched. “What do you mean?”
“Stasis either evolves you into something dark, something evil—worse than anything I ever could have imagined.” He hesitated. “Or...it kills you.”
Chapter 9
Stephen didn’t start laughing and tell me he was just messing with me. He was totally serious. This horrible situation didn’t have a happy ending, a slow fading of the hunger like my aunt had suggested, and a return to normal life.
It had a death sentence.
I grabbed hold of his sleeve as my numbness over his deadly proclamation faded and panic set in like somebody lighting up a firecracker inside me. “You need to give me back my soul...and Carly’s, too. Please, Stephen, before it’s too late.”
His expression turned stony. “You mean before I change. Or die.”
I dug my fingers into his arm as he began to pull away from me. “Stephen—”
“Oh. My. God. You have got to be kidding me right now, right?”
My stomach sank at the sound of the familiar voice behind me. I didn’t have to turn around. I knew who it was.
If I had a nemesis, Jordan Fitzpatrick was it. She was a drop-dead gorgeous redhead, and an aspiring model. We went to the same school.
She hated me. And the feeling was completely mutual. I didn’t like coming face-to-face with her in public places since she never held back on her opinion, especially when it came to me. Sometimes I could take it and throw it right back at her. But other times words could hurt me, even if they weren’t sticks and stones.
Did I mention that Stephen was her ex, and he’d broken her heart?
While still reeling from the horrific news Stephen had shared with me, I turned slowly to see Jordan standing there with her best friend and trusty blond sidekick, Julie Travis. Julie was another one who wasn’t thrilled by my continuing existence—and vice versa. Julie was the reason that Colin and Carly had broken up over the summer. She’d slept with him while he’d been drunk at a party.
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Michelle Rowen
MY KISS CAN KILL.I used to be ordinary Samantha Day, but that’s changed. Now, after one dark kiss from a dangerous boy, I can steal someone’s soul…or their life. If I give in to the constant hunger inside me, I hurt anyone I kiss. If I don’t…I hurt myself. Bishop is the one whose kiss I crave most, but if I kiss him, I’ll kill him. Then there’s another boy, one I can’t hurt. One whose kiss seems to miraculously quell my hunger.They’re both part of a team of angels and demons that’s joined forces in my city to fight a mysterious rising darkness, an evil that threatens everyone I know and love. I just wonder if I’ll be able to help Bishop–or if I’m just another part of the darkness he’s sworn to destroy….NIGHTWATCHERS BOOK 2 ‘Gorgeous angels, suspense & romance…’ -Richelle Mead on Dark Kiss
MY KISS CAN KILL.
I used to be ordinary Samantha Day, but that’s changed. Now, after one dark kiss from a dangerous boy, I can steal someone’s soul...or their life. If I give in to the constant hunger inside me, I hurt anyone I kiss. If I don’t...I hurt myself.
Bishop is the one whose kiss I crave most, but if I kiss him, I’ll kill him. Then there’s another boy, one I can’t hurt. One whose kiss seems to miraculously quell my hunger. They’re both part of a team of angels and demons that’s joined forces in my city to fight a mysterious rising darkness, an evil that threatens everyone I know and love. I just wonder if I’ll be able to help Bishop—or if I’m just another part of the darkness he’s sworn to destroy....
“Why are you here, Samantha?” His deep voice, edged with displeasure, came from right behind me.
I clutched the railing tighter and squeezed my eyes shut, trying not to breathe at all, but that was kind of impossible. Even soulless, voracious monsters like me needed oxygen.
When I inhaled this time, his familiar scent—warm, spicy and totally devastating—slid over me.
Finally I forced myself to face him and my breath caught.
I’d almost forgotten how effortlessly he affected me.
Bishop’s dark brows were drawn tightly over intense cobalt-blue eyes. He towered over me—a full foot taller than my short five-two. Broad shoulders. Sinewy muscle rippled down his arms
under his long-sleeved black T-shirt, which was drawn tight
across his chest. His mahogany-colored hair was messy tonight.
I had a sudden urge to slide my fingers through it to push it off his forehead. I fisted my hands at my sides to keep from automatically reaching toward him.
The angel had had that effect on me from the first moment I met him. Uncontrollable. Compulsive. Irresistible.
Praise for Dark Kiss:
“More, please! Gorgeous angels, suspense and romance...this book has everything I love. I was pulled in from the very first sentence.”
—Richelle Mead, New York Times bestselling author of the Vampire Academy series
“Awesome story line, awesome characters...I highly recommend Dark Kiss as a must read.”
—I Heart YA Books
“A must read for all you angel/demon lovers out there... An outstanding start to this fab new series.”
—The Book Hookup
“Fantastic writing style, a sweet romance and...original and intriguing angel/demon lore.”
—diminutivemimi.blogspot.com (http://www.diminutivemimi.blogspot.com)
Wicked Kiss
Michelle Rowen
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
Contents
Chapter 1 (#u77791954-0d77-5499-9375-919d57e624f0)
Chapter 2 (#uc8f029fa-cf2a-5c97-b8a7-a48cfff22f25)
Chapter 3 (#ufa77b56d-8564-5b6c-8063-b7a4c8688d39)
Chapter 4 (#u2b386cfe-473f-55b9-81b2-ab9b125159d6)
Chapter 5 (#uc80105e3-2bc7-5dfd-ad1f-eaedb3fe6120)
Chapter 6 (#u3949894d-b258-5b73-b844-de17ae364ed8)
Chapter 7 (#ubb163fbc-6e93-56ec-9832-f3544ee58a2e)
Chapter 8 (#u2143a4ed-2fb1-5837-842d-195f2de7905f)
Chapter 9 (#ue6e09f7f-f14b-5c5b-a18a-4a1e4ab565ef)
Chapter 10 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 11 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 12 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 13 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 14 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 15 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 16 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 17 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 18 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 19 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 20 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 21 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 22 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 23 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 24 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 25 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 26 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 27 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 28 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 29 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 30 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 31 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 32 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 33 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 34 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 35 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 36 (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 37 (#litres_trial_promo)
Acknowledgments (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter 1
Crave used to be a prime hangout for dangerous monsters, but tonight I seemed to be the only one here.
A week ago, I lost my best friend in the whole world in this very club. Literally lost her, in a swirling black vortex that opened up and swallowed her whole, and took her...somewhere else. Somewhere horrible.
I didn’t know how yet, or when, but I clung to that small yet resilient hope that had taken firm root inside of me: I would find her.
Carly had loved this all-ages nightclub and came here every weekend like clockwork, dancing till the place closed down. If I shut my eyes I could still see her on the dance floor, the one place she could forget her problems and let the music become her entire world.
Damn, I missed her.
But I had to come back tonight. I couldn’t wait any longer.
There was somebody I had to find who used to hang out here a lot. Somebody I’d been searching the city for. Somebody who’d stolen something from me that I needed back before it was too late.
I had no real idea when “too late” was going to be. But I had a sick, gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach that we were getting really close.
“You look way too serious, Sam,” Kelly said lightly from across the booth. “And you’re not even listening to anything we’re saying.”
“Sorry,” I began, my head still in a fog. I forced a smile to my lips and looked at Kelly and Sabrina—both blond and perky cheerleader types. I wasn’t blond, nor was I particularly perky or cheerful. But they were both good friends of mine, anyway.
Well, maybe good friends was pushing it. We usually ate lunch at the same table and we had gym class together. I think they liked me. That totally counted.
After their invite earlier today, I’d decided to join them here for a “girls’ night out.” At least, that’s what they thought it was. For me, it was an excuse to be here on the off chance I might find the boy who’d literally stolen my soul.
“Yeah,” Sabrina agreed. “Like, earth to Samantha. What’s up with you?”
“Nothing. I’m just a bit distracted tonight.”
Understatement, table for one.
Kelly took a sip of her Diet Coke and eyed the remains of the nachos that sat on the table between us. There wasn’t much left, thanks to me—just a bit of cheesy sludge and a couple soggy tortilla chips. A single jalapeño pepper remained, lying there mournfully after the battle its friends had lost.
I couldn’t help it. I was really hungry tonight. And when I was hungry I needed to eat so my other cravings didn’t kick into overdrive.
Unfortunately, the plate of nachos hadn’t helped a bit.
“FYI, we were talking about Halloween,” Sabrina reminded me. “Do you know what you’re wearing to Noah Tyler’s party?”
“Noah’s having a party?” I asked absently, keeping my eyes on the club over her shoulder while still trying my best to appear attentive.
“Yeah. And he did tell me that he really wants you to be there.” She grinned. “I think somebody’s got a crush on you.”
It took me a moment to clue in to what she meant. I cringed at the thought, and also the vague realization that Noah had been checking me out lately. I’d tried to ignore it. “He doesn’t.”
She shrugged and the girls shared a knowing look. “Whatever you say. But you’re coming, right?”
“Wednesday night?” I forced a look of interest as well as a cheery smile though I felt anything but. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
I was definitely going to miss it. No question.
They discussed their costumes. I half listened. The jalapeño pepper died a quick and painless death.
Then I stayed behind as a song came on that they got incredibly excited about and they made their way to the nearby dance floor. A sprinkle of colorful lights fell across their faces as they joined the swell of other kids dancing to the throbbing beat of the techno song—from a close bump and grind to a frenetic waving of arms and legs. I used to do a kind of uncomfortable shuffle thing when it came to dancing. I had always been hyperaware that somebody might be watching, judging, laughing. All of the above.
“Dance like nobody’s watching,” Carly always insisted.
“Did you see that embroidered on a cushion somewhere?”
She’d give me a grin. “Probably. But it’s still true. Gotta enjoy every moment because you never know when it’s going to be your last.”
The memory of the eternal optimism of Carly Kessler made my throat too thick to swallow down another gulp of my ginger ale. I returned my full focus to scanning the club, the entrance, the dance floor.
We’d been here for an hour. An hour to consume a plate of nachos, chat with a couple girls who generously tolerated my company, watch a couple hundred kids having a good time on a Saturday night, remembering that I used to be one of them, and to realize that this wasn’t getting me anywhere.
The scent in the air was intense and it made it increasingly hard to think. Not sweat or perfume—something else. Something deeper that slithered around me like a boa constrictor, squeezing painfully tight.
While I might look like a normal seventeen-year-old girl to anyone who didn’t know otherwise, without my soul I was now a “gray,” someone that had the ability to steal someone else’s soul through a kiss.
It was a mistake to come here. It’s only getting worse.
“Relax,” I commanded myself.
But it was hard to relax when you couldn’t let yourself breathe deeply. Shallow breathing was the best way to maintain control in a busy place like this. I’d come here to find a missing person, not to pick out a potential victim.
Finally, desperately needing to keep my mind off my unnatural but growing hunger, I pushed away from the booth and moved toward the brass railing that surrounded the dance floor and separated it from the seating area. I gripped the smooth, cold metal hard enough to make my knuckles turn white. After a few moments, my aching hunger finally eased off.
And then it spiked back up to maximum.
“Why are you here, Samantha?” His deep voice, edged with displeasure, came from right behind me.
I clutched the railing tighter and squeezed my eyes shut, trying not to breathe at all, but that was kind of impossible. Even soulless, voracious monsters like me needed oxygen.
When I inhaled this time, his familiar scent—warm, spicy and totally devastating—slid over me.
Finally, I forced myself to face him.
Bishop’s dark brows were drawn tightly over intense cobalt-blue eyes. He towered over me—a full foot taller than my short five-two. Broad shoulders. Sinewy muscle rippled down his arms under his long-sleeve black T-shirt, which was drawn tight across his chest. His mahogany-colored hair was messy tonight. I had a sudden urge to slide my fingers through it and push it off his forehead. I clenched my hands into fists at my sides to keep from automatically reaching toward him.
“Why am I here?” I forced myself to say it casually. “Why wouldn’t I be? Crave’s a great place to hang out with friends.”
“You’re looking for Stephen.”
I shrugged a shoulder, tore my gaze away from his and studied the dance floor.
“Samantha.”
The way he said my name always made me shiver. Still, this time my gaze shot back to his with more annoyance than nonchalance. “I know you want me to stay home every night with the door locked, but I can’t do that. Besides, I haven’t heard from you in a few days. I figured I was on my own again.”
Bishop’s expression remained frustratingly neutral. “I’ve been looking for him.”
“Found him yet?”
His jaw tensed. “Believe me, you’d be the first to know if I had.”
“Well, if you haven’t found him, then it sounds like you need help. That’s why I’m here.”
He hissed out a sigh. “Seriously, Samantha. You need to go home and let me handle this.”
Hot anger ignited inside of me, helping me resist my automatic pull toward him. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Bishop’s brows were drawn together, but a smile now tugged at the corner of his lips. “Feisty tonight, aren’t we?”
“Define feisty.”
“Samantha Day. Seventeen years old. Normally a realist who knows right from wrong, but is currently glaring at me like she wants to punch me in the stomach.”
“Good definition.” Something suddenly clicked for me. “You seem strangely okay tonight. What happened?”
The smile fell from his lips completely. “I’m not okay. But I’ve found another way to deal with my problem when I have to.”
“How? I didn’t think your particular problem came with a multiple choice solution.”
“Neither did I.”
He might look like a gorgeous eighteen-year-old boy, but Bishop was actually an angel who’d been sent here to Trinity to take care of the gray problem. But something went horribly wrong when he left Heaven. Another angel who wanted to sabotage his mission had made him a “fallen” angel—one with a soul. The soul was a punishment to those truly fallen. It wreaked havoc with their mental stability, causing them to go slowly insane. But it was also necessary for their ongoing survival. A soul to a fallen angel was a true double-edged sword. It messed up their minds, but without it they would perish.
I’d kissed Bishop once and taken part of his soul—it had been the most amazing and horrible kiss of my entire life. Now I instinctively wanted more. And part of him—like any gray’s victim—wanted to be kissed again.
Yeah. You could say it was a complicated relationship.
“Well, I’m glad,” I said. “I guess now I know why I haven’t seen you lately. If you don’t need me to help you find your sanity, then you can focus on the mission instead. Sooner it’s completed, the sooner you can find a permanent solution to your problem. Right?”
“You think that’s why I’ve stayed away? You don’t think it’s hard for me to be this close to you right now?” He leaned dangerously closer. “Remember, it’s not just you suffering here.”
My hunger level shot through the roof.
Oh, yes. I remembered.
When his hand closed on my wrist, a shiver of electricity zipped across my skin. My eyes snapped to his. “You really shouldn’t touch me if you don’t need to.”
“I know.”
The rest of the club seemed to fall away so there was only he and I left behind.
Right now, Bishop was too close and smelled way too good.
“I haven’t had any slipups since I last saw you,” I said, my voice strained. “I can control this until we find Stephen.”
“I know you’ve been on your best behavior.”
I looked up at him, confused. Then clarity dawned. “Wait. Are you saying you’ve been watching me the past few days?”
“It’s not always me. And it’s not all the time.”
I gaped at him, the thought that he’d been monitoring me made me feel like a potential shoplifter. “You don’t trust me.”
His brows drew together. “This isn’t about trust.”
“Sure it is.”
“If Stephen tries to contact you when you’re alone, then I need to know.”
I swallowed hard. “I’m worried you—or one of the others—is going to find him first and stick your dagger through his chest with no questions asked. One less gray to clean up later. But that can’t happen. I need him alive, so you need to back off.”
That painfully sexy smile touched his lips again as he studied me. “Yes, definitely feisty tonight.”
I snorted softly, but refused to let down my guard completely. “I need my soul back. I can’t live like this.”
“I know.”
The music shifted to a new song, even louder than the one before, if that was possible. The ground shook with the nearby dancers stomping on it. A waitress holding a tray of fried appetizers moved past us.
“Are you here alone?” I asked.
He glanced toward the far corner of the dark and noisy nightclub. “No. Brought some backup to help with the search while the others are out on regular patrol.”
I looked to see who it was and cringed at the sight. Someone tall and blond and familiar.
Kraven worked with Bishop to save the city from things like me. At first glance I would have guessed that Kraven was another angel.
Nope.
Heaven and Hell worked together very occasionally on problems that threatened the integral balance of light and dark, good and evil.
Soul-eating monsters were just such a threat.
Kraven represented the dark side of the scale.
He was with a girl off in the corner and it was obvious that he was hitting on her. Heavily. He braced his hand over her shoulder, creating a partial cage she looked in no hurry to escape from. She grinned up at him as if in love. For all I knew, maybe she was.
As I watched him warily, wondering what his plans for that innocent—or not so innocent—girl were, he glanced over his shoulder at me. A cool smile curled the corner of his mouth.
“Yeah, he looks like he’s really helping the search,” I said with disdain. “If you’re searching for slutty girls.”
“Distractions happen.”
I chewed my bottom lip and looked up at him. “I’m surprised that out of the whole team you’d pick your demonic brother to spend the evening with.”
Bishop’s expression tightened.
When he finally released his hold on my wrist, I grabbed the front of his shirt before he could move away from me.
“Are you ever going to tell me more about the two of you?” I’d come up with no reasonable explanation of how one brother became an angel and the other a demon, despite the tiny breadcrumbs of info I’d collected along the way.
“There’s nothing to tell.”
“Yeah, right. How about you at least tell me the name you had when you were human? I know one thing for sure—it wasn’t Bishop.”
“Okay.” He eyed me. “It was Barbara.”
“You’re hilarious.”
“And you still look like you want to punch me.”
“I’m barely restraining myself, actually.”
That smile returned to play at his lips. His gaze moved to the other side of the club and his expression grew grim again. “I need to talk to Roth. Wait here.”
Another team member. Another demon. Roth, however, made Kraven look like a friendly teddy bear. And Kraven was not a friendly teddy bear by anyone’s definition.
“I thought you wanted me to leave?” I said.
“I’ll take you home when we’re done here. Give me five minutes. Stephen’s dangerous and I don’t want you finding him by yourself.”
“I can handle him.”
Bishop returned my challenging look with one of his own. “Five minutes.”
“Fine.”
I watched as he walked across the club to where tall, handsome and hateful Roth stood by the long bar that only sold nonalcoholic beverages and appetizers. The crowd of kids swelled to cut off my view of the two.
Even with Bishop gone, my hunger hadn’t faded one bit. Strange. I thought I’d get a chance to compose myself better.
“Hey, Samantha.”
Damn. I glanced over to see Colin Richards standing right next to me. He was poised directly in what I’d termed my “orbit of hunger.” Two feet or less. The danger zone.
“Colin,” I squeaked out. “Hey.”
I wasn’t romantically interested in Colin at all, but unfortunately, the feeling wasn’t mutual. He’d taken my rejection hard, especially when I showed very nonrejection behavior whenever he entered the orbit and I couldn’t control my hunger quite so well. Most people respected your personal space. Colin wasn’t one of them.
He swept his gaze over the short, black skirt and silver tank top I’d chosen to wear so I’d fit in with Kelly and Sabrina and the rest of the Saturday night crowd.
“You’ve kept a low profile this week,” he said. “Are you specifically avoiding me, or just generally being a bitch to everyone?”
I winced at his sharp words, but then I smelled the alcohol on his breath. So much for this being a booze-free club. Some kids tried to sneak it in, anyway. Colin was becoming well-known for drinking too much and getting into trouble. When he dated Carly over the summer, he’d made a bunch of vodka-fueled bad choices, including cheating on her at a pool party.
“Nice,” I said drily. “And maybe when you sober up, you won’t be such an ass.”
This earned me a humorless snort as he drained whatever was in his plastic cup. His gaze slid down the front of me again as if he was having trouble keeping his attention on my face. My cheeks grew warm at his blatant gaze.
“Who was that guy you were talking to?”
I blinked. “None of your business.”
“Your boyfriend?”
“Again, none of your business.”
He was being very confrontational tonight, which made me sad. Colin was actually a really nice guy, despite some of the more epic mistakes he’d made in the past. And I knew I’d hurt him last week, so I wouldn’t hold this particular discussion against him in the future. This time, anyway.
Walk away, I told myself. But my feet refused to move. I fought my rising hunger with every ounce of strength I had. The more I fought, the colder I got until goose bumps broke out over my bare arms and I shivered, despite the club being at least eighty degrees. The cold was a side effect of not having a soul.
Colin leaned closer, which only made things worse. I didn’t smell the vodka on his breath anymore; what I smelled was warm, tempting and entirely edible. Less so than Bishop, but still more than anyone else in this club right now.
“Heard from Carly?” he asked.
That woke me up like a glass of cold water thrown in my face.
Colin, like almost everyone else, believed Carly had run away with a secret boyfriend and was off having a misguided, but romantic adventure.
“No,” I said softly. My eyes began to burn.
He snorted again. It was an unpleasant, mocking sound. “Look at you, all misty over Carly taking off with some guy. Feeling abandoned by your BFF? Poor Sam. Boo hoo.”
I gave him a careful look. “I know I hurt you—”
“Hurt me?” he scoffed. “Please. I’m over it.”
“Yeah, sure you are.” I studied him, uncertain how to deal with this problem. “Look, Colin, I’m sorry. Really. But it’s for the best. You don’t need to be near me right now. In fact, I’d appreciate it if you backed off before my friend gets back.”
“Jealous, is he?”
I’d had more than enough of this conversation and I needed him to step away from me now. “Leave me alone, Colin. I don’t like you. At all. Get it through your head, okay?”
I forced myself to look at the dance floor again.
“You’re such a liar.” His words slurred together, heavy with enough underlying pain to make me flinch. “Everything that comes out of your mouth is a damn lie. You liked me. I know you did. I saw it in your eyes. You think you can just walk away from something like that? That I’d let you?”
Let me? “I think you need to go—”
But before I could say another word, Colin grabbed hold of me and crushed his mouth against mine.
Chapter 2
No!
I tried to pull away from him, to shove against his chest as hard as I could.
But it was too late. The hunger that had swirled around me the entire time I’d been at Crave, which had intensified to an impossible to ignore level when Bishop was close to me, that waited patiently while Colin blurted out what was on his mind—
It spilled over.
The pounding dance music muted. The sparkling lights faded. The club disappeared. My rational thinking ceased. And my hunger took over.
This wasn’t a kiss with a drunk boy who liked me and was mad I didn’t like him in return. This was about feeding—that part of me that was missing a soul and was constantly trying to devour everyone else’s.
It was what I feared the most. I didn’t want to hurt anyone. But that was exactly what I was doing.
Feeding on Colin was so natural for me. In this mindless state, it was the most natural thing in the world—neither good nor bad. And with every bit of his soul I devoured, delicious warmth spread through me, chasing the horrible, endless cold away. My thoughts about hurting him vanished. I would feed until I was satisfied, and since I’d barely ever fed before, that would take a long time.
Someone grabbed my upper arm and painfully wrenched me away from Colin. Colin staggered back and dropped down into a nearby booth. Thin, black lines branched around his mouth and his skin was sickly pale. His eyes were glazed. His chest moved rapidly as he gasped for breath.
Haven’t taken it all. Just a piece...
The grip on my arm tightened and I turned to see that it was Kraven now in front of me, shaking his head.
“Honestly,” he said. “Can’t let you out of our sight for a minute, can we?”
“Let go of me!” I was working on instinct only, still possessed by the hunger. I stared at Colin. “I need more.”
“You need more?” Kraven grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him instead of Colin. “Try this.”
He kissed me hard, releasing my arm to slide his hands into my long hair. I automatically tried to feed, but there was nothing there. Regular demons like Kraven didn’t have souls. This was the proof. With no soul to feed from, this was just a kiss.
And yet, strangely enough, it still seemed to satisfy me. I wasn’t feeding, but my hunger began to ease a fraction at a time.
But then the kiss stopped. Abruptly.
“What the hell are you doing to her?” Bishop snarled.
He grabbed hold of Kraven and wrenched him away from me, slamming the demon hard against the wall.
Bishop’s eyes blazed bright blue. They did that sometimes. He’d told me it was a bit of celestial energy that rose up when he got emotional. Based on the current neon brightness, he was very emotional.
My head continued to clear, although not as rapidly as I’d have liked it to. I staggered back from them and landed in the booth across from the slowly recovering Colin. A quick sweep of the club showed that nobody was paying us any attention.
Neat trick that demons and angels had—they could cloak an area to gain a little privacy when problems arose.
Kraven shoved Bishop back from him. “Sorry, but your little girlfriend was in need of some help.”
“That was you helping?”
“Worked, didn’t it?”
I sent a look at Colin. My mind had now cleared completely and my control was back. Guilt and horror slammed through me at what I’d done. The black lines around Colin’s mouth had faded completely, but his eyes were still glazed. A gray’s victim seemed to go into a short-term trance while they were being fed upon. Since I’d experienced it from the victim’s side, I knew that it felt way better than it looked. Exciting, exhilarating, amazing—just like a good kiss should be.
But there was nothing good about this kiss. If I’d successfully taken all of Colin’s soul, I could have killed him. Or, if he was strong enough to survive it, he would become another gray, capable of hurting others.
Either thought scared the hell out of me.
My gaze shot to Bishop. “Colin kissed me. I—I’m sorry. I couldn’t help myself after that.”
Colin shook his head as if to clear it. He glanced at me, and then at the two tall boys staring at him.
“What—?” he began.
“How do you feel?” Bishop asked him.
He scrubbed his hand over his forehead. “Um, okay, I think. What happened?”
Bishop grabbed the front of his shirt and yanked him out of the booth. “Don’t kiss her again. Ever. You hear me?”
Colin gaped at him. “Who are you?”
“You don’t want to know. Leave now.”
Bishop let him go and Colin staggered back, then glanced at me as if waiting for me to defend him. Instead, I forced myself to look down at my hands, which I’d clasped in my lap.
“Sorry,” he began. “I, uh, don’t know what I was thinking.”
Without any further argument, he slunk away from us and was swallowed by the rest of the crowded club.
“Your girlfriend’s a great kisser,” Kraven said drily. “Her tongue is like...wow. She doesn’t hold back. You’re really missing out with that pesky soul of yours.”
Bishop turned on the demon, his eyes flashing. “Stay away from Samantha or I’ll kill you.”
“This is the thanks I get for saving the day? She was going to suck that kid dry right here in the middle of the club. Besides, why are you mad at me? I think some of that angel attitude should be pointed in her direction. Or can gray-girl do no wrong in your eyes, even when she slips up? Or slips someone else the tongue?”
Bishop’s expression didn’t lose a fraction of its fury. “I think you do want me to kill you. Is that your goal?”
Kraven gave him a humorless smile. “Don’t know. How many times can one brother kill the other? Are you looking for some kind of Guinness World Record here?”
“Try me.”
Kraven liked to mess with the minds of others, but I wasn’t in the mood for it now. He wasn’t helping anything by baiting Bishop like this.
“Why do you have to be like this?” I asked.
He finally spared a look in my direction. “Please. You should be thanking me for saving your pretty little ass a minute ago. Instead, I get vilified. Whether either of you wants to admit it or not, the kiss worked. It snapped you out of your monster madness.”
Bishop’s brows drew together as if he was considering this possibility. His gaze then hardened. “We’re leaving.”
Kraven saluted. “Yes, sir.”
I’d wanted to come here tonight so I could find some answers. I’d honestly thought I was in control of myself and my hunger.
But I’d hurt Colin, and if Kraven hadn’t stopped me I could have killed him.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered to Bishop as I pushed myself up from the booth.
Bishop didn’t meet my eyes. “How much of that boy’s soul did you take?”
I couldn’t help but notice that he hadn’t replied to my “I’m sorry” with a breezy “it’s okay.” Couldn’t blame him for that.
I let out a shaky breath. “Not much.”
“Be careful. He’ll instinctively seek you out in the future so you can finish the job.”
“How do you know?” Kraven asked.
“Believe me, I know.”
I was definitely ready to leave. I’d done more than enough damage for one night. Stephen wasn’t here so there was no reason to hang out a moment longer. I wanted to run home and hide my face from the world, but instead I tried to stay calm and not let anyone see how devastated I was. I said a quick goodbye to Sabrina and Kelly, who’d thankfully missed all of my drama while they’d been busy dancing.
Roth caught up with us at the front door past a poster advertising Wednesday’s “Halloween Bash.” We exited the club, and the cool, late-October air immediately chilled me. Stars sparkled in the clear, black sky and the moon, along with the parking lot floodlights, lit up the night around us. I ignored the cold, instead pulling my too-thin coat tighter around my shoulders.
Roth scanned the three of us silently trudging along the sidewalk. “Did I miss something?”
Bishop’s jaw tightened. “No.”
“Me and gray-girl just made out,” Kraven said.
Roth made a face. “Disgusting. Why would you want to kiss something like her?”
“Research.”
I expected no less from Roth. I was well aware that he despised me. Tonight only proved that I was in more trouble than I thought.
I scanned the night surrounding us, anything to take my attention off what had happened with Colin and Kraven.
“I’m taking you home,” Bishop said.
I took a deep breath and let it out. “To keep me out of trouble.”
“For starters.”
At that moment I spotted something in the sky that grabbed my attention. I felt the color slowly drain from my face. “Can’t go home. Not yet.”
“Why not?”
I pointed at the sky behind him where a familiar searchlight had just appeared in the distance—although I knew none of them could see it like I could. “Looks like you’re getting a new recruit.”
Chapter 3
“Don’t know why a gray can do this,” Roth grumbled as he trailed after us. “Why can she see the searchlights when we can’t?”
He didn’t know the truth and neither did Kraven. Only Bishop knew and he’d sworn me to secrecy about it.
I wasn’t just a gray.
Bishop always talked about the universal balance and how important it was. Well, I was about as balanced as you could get. Equal parts dark and light thanks to my birth parents—whom I’d never met. Up until a week ago, I didn’t even know I’d been adopted.
My father was a demon named Nathan, my mother was an angel named Anna.
Anna had been killed shortly after I was born and Nathan had joined her in the Hollow, her final resting place. The same place Carly had been sucked up into.
Theirs was a forbidden romance doomed from the start, but it had produced yours truly. Because of this, I was what was termed a “nexus”—the center, the connection—and the fact that I’d lost my soul meant I could allegedly channel the powers of both Heaven and Hell.
It helped me do things, see things. It made me special. It made me valuable. Clinging tightly to this thought after what I’d done to Colin was the only thing keeping me from completely freaking out.
“Why are they sending someone else?” Kraven asked, ignoring the other demon. He didn’t sound happy.
“I don’t know,” Bishop replied. He walked so close to me that I could barely concentrate. My hunger still had me tightly in its grip and the scent of his soul, of him, did crazy things to my head. “You’re sure it’s one of our searchlights, Samantha? Not just a regular one?”
“Positive.” The light that shone up into the sky was restoring my hope with each step I took. I moved toward it like I was following a rainbow to a guaranteed pot of gold.
A sixth member for the team would mean one more chance to find Stephen. At this very moment, I didn’t care if he turned out to be a demon or an angel.
However, when we followed the searchlight to its origin, I found something I wasn’t expecting.
“Well?” Bishop asked when I stopped walking. “Where is he?”
“Not a he.” I pointed shakily in the direction of the girl up ahead. As soon as my gaze locked on her, the light disappeared. It only ever stayed on long enough for me to make visual contact.
She was young—like me. Seventeen, maybe. She had long, pale blond hair. She wore ripped jeans and a black sweater. She wandered along the sidewalk next to a busy street with her arms crossed over her chest as if trying to keep warm.
I’d always thought it was incredibly sexist that Heaven and Hell had only sent boys on this mission to save Trinity. Looked like they’d changed their minds.
“This is ridiculous,” Roth said. “Girls are useless.”
Just the sound of his voice rubbed me the wrong way. I didn’t waste my breath in arguing with him, but he must have felt the heat of my glare.
“They are,” he insisted.
“Whatever you say. Obviously, you know everything.”
“Finally, you’re starting to get me.” He laughed darkly. “Let’s hurry up. I’d rather be out killing things like you tonight than play follow the leader. At least, until we finally get a crack at you.”
“Shut up, Roth,” Bishop growled. He’d moved to stand between me and the demon while Kraven watched us, amused.
Fear slid through me at the way he’d said it. So bluntly. Like this was a guaranteed thing. “What are you talking about?”
He looked at me like I was stupid. “You’re a gray. As long as things like you are still breathing, that barrier is up, trapping you—and us—in this city. When you’re all dead, the barrier vanishes and we’ll be pulled back where we belong. You think we’re giving you a pass forever because of this magical mojo you can do?”
“Roth.” There was a sharp edge of warning in Bishop’s voice.
Roth snorted. “We’re going to kill her, it’s just a matter of time. You said so yourself.”
My breath left me in a rush. “You said what?”
Bishop’s gaze flashed to me. “I didn’t say that.”
“So he misunderstood you? Please tell me how that sort of message could get messed up.”
Kraven laughed, an unpleasant sound that slithered under my skin. “Bishop didn’t come right out and say we had permission to kill you. But he said if you slip up and start munching on souls then you’d become a problem we’d have to deal with. Better?”
“Is that true?” I shot a searching look at Bishop.
His expression was unreadable. “We’ll talk about this later.”
“No, we’ll talk about it now.”
“Later,” he said again firmly. “Go home, Samantha. We can handle the girl.”
I stared at him, trying to read his frustratingly hard-to-read face. I suddenly wanted to run—far away from here, far away from these three...even Bishop, who normally made me feel safe. At least, I thought he did.
But I stood my ground. I refused to be chased away that easily. I couldn’t let myself give in to my fear. “I’m not leaving yet. I can still help you tonight.”
Disapproval slid through his blue eyes. “Fine. Stay. Your choice.”
I could prove to them that what happened at the club wasn’t really me. It was a slipup, not an indication that I was losing it. And when I got my soul back, my hunger would be gone. The cold I always felt would fade away. I would be as normal as I could ever hope to be.
“Feeling a connection to the blonde chick?” Kraven asked with a smirk. “How sweet. Maybe you can be best friends. I know you’re looking for a new one since the last got flushed away.”
I didn’t know why I was surprised that he could be so thoughtlessly cruel. My only defense was to put on a good game face. The best way to combat sarcasm was with more of the same.
“Or maybe you can bite me.”
His grin stretched. “Is that an invitation?”
“Not tonight...James.”
His smile fell.
I knew his human name. He’d shared it with me in a moment of weakness, and I knew it bothered him when I used it.
“Gray-girl’s got a smart mouth,” Kraven muttered. “It’s going to get her in trouble someday.”
“You’re right,” Bishop said. “It will.”
He was mad that I hadn’t tucked tail between my legs and scurried home like a good little monster. But I was staying for the ritual. I would be there for the new girl, no matter what.
I knew what was coming. She didn’t. Right now, she’d have no memory of why she was here. The invisible barrier that stretched over Trinity, put in place by the combined powers of Heaven and Hell, was designed to keep supernaturals in the city. But it also kept supernaturals out. To get in, angels or demons had to be specially protected against it. It also stripped away memories. The only thing that helped pinpoint a demon or angel was the searchlight—the one only I could see.
The ritual was what restored them to their former demonic or angelic selves. If it wasn’t performed, they’d wander the city forever with no idea who they were.
I would rather not have to witness the ritual again—to put it mildly—but I couldn’t just walk away and let this girl deal with these three without a shred of moral support.
Her pace had quickened. She knew she was being followed. Before long, she found herself in a blind alley, in a less populated neighborhood. She turned to face us, holding her hands up in front of her.
“I don’t want any trouble,” she said uneasily.
“Do we look like trouble?” Kraven asked, looking down at himself. “Honestly. I’m a little insulted.”
“Let’s do this,” Roth said.
Bishop shot him a look. “Patience.”
The girl’s gaze moved to me and a measure of relief went through her eyes. I knew I looked pretty harmless. Nothing more than a teenager dressed to go clubbing on a Saturday night, my long dark hair loose around my shoulders. Nothing to fear.
Not at first glance, anyway.
“Who are you?” she asked.
“A friend,” I told her, forcing myself to sound calm. “My name’s Samantha.”
She swallowed hard. “Why are you following me?”
“Because we want to help you. We know you’re having problems. We know you don’t know who you are.”
Her blue eyes widened. “How could you know that?”
“Magic,” Roth said with a thin, unpleasant smile.
Bishop was the one who always performed the ritual, but he wasn’t making any sudden moves.
“I think I hit my head.” She scrubbed her hand through her blond hair. “I woke up earlier and I—I didn’t know where I was. I’m sure I’ll be fine in a little while, so...thanks, but I don’t need any help.”
Despite the chill in the air, sweat dripped down my back and my palms were damp. “You will be fine. I promise.”
“Samantha’s right. You’ll be fine.” Bishop finally pulled the curved golden dagger out of the sheath he wore under his shirt, along his spine.
Her eyes shot to it immediately and widened with fear. “What is that?”
“Check her back.”
Kraven grabbed hold of both of her wrists in one hand. He pulled at her sweater and she let out a frightened shriek.
I stormed forward and punched him in his arm. “Do you have to be such a jerk? You’re scaring her!”
“Sorry, sweetness. There isn’t really a polite way to do this.”
“Samantha, please don’t let them hurt me,” the girl begged. A tear slid down her cheek and she trembled, but didn’t try very hard to break away from Kraven’s grip.
My heart wrenched for her. “I need to check something real quick. Everything will be better soon. You need to trust me, okay?”
“O-okay.” Her voice quaked.
I took a deep breath and pulled her sweater up her back a few inches so I could see her skin. The lines of the tattoo I’d been hoping to see were visible immediately, wrapping right around her sides and past the waistline of her jeans.
“Is it there?” Bishop asked.
A small but immediate measure of relief coursed through me. “She has an imprint. She’s definitely the right one.”
She stared at me with confusion. “An imprint? What’s an imprint?”
I nodded and returned her sweater to its previous position. “Something that will make everything all right in just a minute.” I looked into her blue eyes and the fear I felt for her must have been reflected there. The panic instantly returned to her gaze.
Her breath came quicker. “What do you mean? What are you going to do to me?”
“Do it, Bishop,” I bit out, nausea coursing through my gut. “Quickly.”
I thought he’d hesitate and show some sign of reluctance for what he had to do. Sometimes I mistook him for a gentle angel who struggled with sanity and needed help from time to time.
But he wasn’t gentle. And he didn’t need any help right now. He was a warrior who didn’t flinch when it came to taking action.
He nudged me out of the way and looked in the girl’s eyes. A coldness moved over his face that scared me.
“Be brave,” he said, as if issuing a command. Then he thrust the dagger into her chest without another moment’s hesitation.
My knees gave out at the same time hers did.
It’s the ritual, I told myself over and over. She’s not human. This isn’t really murder.
The only way a demon or angel could get their memories back after passing through the invisible barrier and into Trinity was to temporarily die—provided that death came from Bishop’s very special golden dagger. The dagger did something, some magic, which removed their protective shielding and restored their former sense of self.
If they were ever stabbed again with the same dagger, however, it would kill them.
I stared down at the blonde girl now lying on the ground of the alley with the dagger sticking out of her chest.
“That was so awesome,” Roth breathed.
“You’re sick,” I snarled at him.
“Your point?” The demon leaned over and yanked the dagger out of her chest when Bishop didn’t reach for it first.
My mind reeled over witnessing this horrible act yet again. “I need to talk to you, Bishop. Alone. Now.”
“Uh-oh,” Kraven said. “Somebody’s in trouble.”
“Fine.” Bishop nodded to the left. “Let’s go over there.”
“Need a chaperone?” Kraven asked. “Wouldn’t want her to get any ideas. Maybe fake murder turns gray-girl on.”
Bishop sent a glare in his direction. “Stay here and watch over the girl.”
“Eat me.”
Apparently, Bishop took that as a “yes, I’ll stay here and watch over the girl.” He led me to a spot farther down the alley and just around the corner. I cast a last glance at the blonde now lying as if dead on the pavement of the alley while two demons lurked nearby waiting for her to wake up again.
“I told you to leave,” Bishop said, his voice and expression equally tight. He wasn’t meeting my gaze. “So if you’re upset about what I had to do, you only have yourself to blame. I was doing my job. I didn’t enjoy that.”
I knew he was right. It was his job—one he was remarkably and chillingly good at. “Look, I—I’m sorry about what happened at Crave tonight. I know you’re mad at me.”
“You think I’m mad?”
“You should be mad.”
“Should I?” He raised an eyebrow, his harsh expression finally thawing at the edges. “Okay, then I’m mad.”
“I knew it.”
“Still, you should have left. I know the ritual upsets you. Especially since it was a girl this time.”
“Which is kind of ridiculous. I’d all but gotten used to it happening to boys. Why should a girl be any different? Maybe I’m the sexist one here.”
“She’ll be fine.”
“You didn’t hesitate. Not even a second.”
“Does that bother you?”
“A little,” I admitted, but held his gaze. “Are there a lot of female angels?”
“Is that what she is? I didn’t see the imprint.”
I nodded. Since angels and demons didn’t have actual wings here in the human world—apparently such things were not physical as much as they were metaphysical—they did retain the mark of such wings. It looked like a large tattoo that stretched across their backs and down their sides. Angel wings were pale with delicate, feathery lines. Demon wings were bold and black and webbed. It was the only way to tell them apart at a glance.
“There are an equal number of male and female angels,” he said.
“Equal. Everything’s equal,” I grumbled. “Got to keep the balance on the universal teeter-totter, don’t you?”
He studied my face. “I know you’re upset.”
I didn’t break our eye contact. “Did you really tell Roth he could kill me if I screw up?”
He didn’t speak for a moment. “No.”
The demon had said it with such certainty, there had to be more to this. I needed to know the truth. “Then what did you say that gave him that idea?”
His gaze grew fiercer. “You can’t let what happened earlier with that boy ever happen again. It’s too dangerous, Samantha.”
It was so cold tonight—or maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it was just me and my soulless side effects. My coat wasn’t thick enough to keep me warm. The tights I wore under my skirt were too thin. I shivered. “That’s the real reason you’ve stayed away from me this week. So I wouldn’t be tempted to kiss you again. So I wouldn’t hurt you again.”
His vivid blue eyes burned into mine. “You didn’t hurt me the first time.”
“But I could next time.”
“We don’t know that for sure.” He wrenched his gaze away from me, his expression shadowing. “I kept my distance because I needed to know if this pull I feel toward you was because of what you are. If this soul inside me has been a magnet drawing me closer to you since the first moment we met.”
It was what I’d also feared. That this—this overpowering thing I felt for Bishop wasn’t real. That it was just another side effect, like me being cold and hungry all the time. All because he had a soul and I longed for it. “And?”
His brows drew together. “Inconclusive. I’ll know for sure when we get your soul back.”
My heart pounded like a wild thing in my chest. “You think it’ll be that simple? Find Stephen, find my soul, pop it back in like a battery pack? Snap, Samantha’s back to normal and you won’t feel so weird around me?”
“Nothing important is ever that simple.” He searched my face. “Let me do my job. Let me find him. And then we’ll figure everything else out.”
I pushed a hand through my hair, tugging on a tangle, and realized I was literally trembling. “Quite honestly? Roth is right. Even if you purge the city of every single other gray, I’m still here. That means the barrier stays right where it is and you’re stuck here.”
“It’s fine.” Bishop rubbed his fingers over his temples, his frown deepening. “All is fine. All will be fine. I swear it will. Nothing to worry about. Nothing, nothing at all.”
There was a worrisome edge of madness to his voice, something I remembered all too well from before. “Are you okay?”
“Why wouldn’t I be? Everything’s fantastic.” When he laughed, it had a sharp, insane edge to it.
He wasn’t okay. Far from it. “You said you’d found alternate ways of dealing with the crazy when it landed. How exactly is that? Deep breathing? Meditation?”
“Something like that.”
“Care to expand?”
“Not really.”
His insistence on always being evasive made me crazy. “Nothing’s really changed, has it? You don’t tell me anything.”
“I tell you what you need to know. But some things...you don’t want to know.”
I flinched. “I thought we were in this together. Like a team. The others don’t know the secret about me....”
“And you are never to tell them.” He grabbed my shoulders tightly as if what I’d said had alarmed him. The craziness in his eyes intensified. “You hear me? None of them can ever know about your birth parents.”
“I hear you. Relax.” I reached down and grabbed his hand. Electricity sparked between us and the insanity began to ease from his expression.
Skin to skin. Touching him only spiked my hunger, but it was essential—at least right now—for him to calm down.
The others knew I could do this, just like I could see the searchlights. But they didn’t know the whole truth like Bishop did.
“Better?” I asked.
“Much.” He nodded, entwining our fingers together for a moment that was equal parts blissful and torturous before he reluctantly let go. “I know you’re frustrated by some of the things I do, but you have to trust me.”
“I want to...”
“But?”
My throat tightened as I locked gazes with him. “How can I trust somebody who won’t even tell me his real name?”
“My name is Bishop.”
“It wasn’t always.”
“No. Not always.” He looked into my eyes and for the briefest moment I was certain he was going to tell me. Then something shuttered there, keeping me out when I only wanted in.
Don’t get me wrong, I liked his name. I loved his name, really. It was right and it suited him. But it wasn’t real. It was something made up, like an actor in Hollywood who wanted to leave his humble beginnings far behind.
If anything, I felt uneasier than I had before our private talk. I followed him wordlessly back to the dark alley to find Roth hovering over the angel while still holding the knife. The way he watched her was predatory.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I demanded.
“She’s so hot. Too bad she’s an angel.” He gave me a cold grin. “I checked under her sweater.”
A sudden flash of fury turned my vision red. “Touch her again and I’ll kill you myself.”
“Chill out, gray-girl.” Kraven stood nearby with his arms crossed over his chest. “I was chaperoning from a disinterested distance. Don’t worry, he didn’t get frisky. It was just her back.”
“She smells so good.” Roth crouched down lower so he could put his face close to hers. “Like strawberries and whipped cream. It’s making me hungry.”
“Get away from her,” Bishop warned.
“Make me.”
All I wanted to do was protect this defenseless girl. I was about to move toward Roth and kick him as hard as I could, hoping to do a little damage with my high heels, when she let out a gasp and her eyes snapped open.
“Back from the dead.” Roth gazed down at her lasciviously. “Welcome, beautiful.”
She stared up at him hovering over her with the knife in his grip. Then her hand shot out and grabbed his throat.
“Get off me.” She pushed him upward and then slammed him down to the ground. She easily disarmed him and held the knife to his throat.
He looked up at her straddling his chest, his eyes wide with surprise.
“That I didn’t expect,” Kraven said, from where he leaned against the wall. “But I kind of like it.”
“Easy.” Bishop approached the furious angel. “It’s okay.”
“How is this okay?” she demanded. “He was sniffing me like a horny dog. Very unprofessional. He must be one of the demons.”
“I’m definitely enjoying this,” Roth said with a lewd grin. “You can sit on me anytime, beautiful. Clothing optional.”
“You’re disgusting.” She jabbed the knife into his throat deep enough to cut him. He winced and blood trickled down his neck. The mocking edge to his expression disappeared. “I despise demons.”
In a single effortless movement, she got to her feet and inspected the golden dagger. Her gaze flicked to Bishop. “Who’s the leader here?”
“I am,” Bishop said.
“Depends on the day, really,” Kraven muttered.
The blonde’s gaze shot to him. “You’re another demon, aren’t you?”
“Is it my cologne or my good looks that gave me away?”
I was becoming more impressed by the second. I’d expected her to be scared and uncertain, like she’d been before. But this angel could kick some serious ass.
“I’m Cassandra,” she said when her attention fell on me. “You said your name’s Samantha, right?”
“That’s right. Samantha Day.”
She cocked her head. “I thought you were human, but...” She looked at Bishop. “I sense that she’s soulless—a gray. I don’t understand.”
“Samantha’s different from the others. I’ll explain everything later.” Bishop’s eyes flicked warily to the knife the blond angel clutched. “I’m Bishop. That’s Kraven. And the demon on the ground in need of a Band-Aid is Roth. Welcome to Trinity, Cassandra.”
“Glad to be here.” She rubbed her previously injured chest and gave him a bright smile. “Stupid ritual.”
“I couldn’t agree more.” He grinned back at her.
I’d been more than prepared to like Cassandra, but a dark ribbon of jealousy suddenly appeared out of nowhere to twist through me.
“Take me to your headquarters and we’ll debrief,” she said.
“Sure thing.” Bishop glanced at me. “Samantha, go home.”
The gorgeous, blond angel gets a killer smile and I get the brush-off. Awesome.
“No,” Cassandra said. “She’s coming with us.”
“Is that necessary?” Bishop asked.
“I have a few questions for her.”
He flicked a glance at me before returning his attention fully to Cassandra and he gave her another knee-weakening grin before offering her his arm. “Of course. Anything you like.”
She took his arm and he began to lead her away, ignoring the rest of us.
I glanced at Kraven as that sharp-taloned jealousy I was trying to ignore began to leave claw marks on the inside of my chest.
He smirked at me. “Love hurts, sweetness.”
Chapter 4
I only had myself to blame. Bishop said I should go. Instead, I insisted on sticking around to help the helpless girl who wasn’t helpless at all.
Now I felt like a specimen under the microscope as Cassandra had been watching every move I made since we got back to St. Andrew’s, which was the abandoned church in an abandoned neighborhood the team had chosen as their makeshift “headquarters” and temporary hotel. Along with yours truly, the blonde angel swept her appraising gaze over the tall ceiling, stained-glass windows and rows of pews in the main sanctuary. Since there was no electricity, hundreds of candles were lit throughout, giving the area an eerie glow.
My feet hurt from these heels—which were meant for nightclubs, not brisk walks through the city streets. Still, the pain gave me a focal point. I concentrated on my aching feet rather than the threads of panic stitching unpleasant patterns through my gut. Even though I’d been given an uneasy pass when it came to the team, I still had a lot in common with a mouse in the middle of a group of feral cats. It didn’t matter if they had halos or horns.
While Cassandra studied me, I studied Bishop. Hard not to. My gaze was always drawn to him when he was in the same room as me. I couldn’t ignore him if I tried.
I refused to believe it was just because I was attracted to his soul, even if that was his hypothesis for my unearthly infatuation with him.
I didn’t feel like this toward Colin. Or anybody else with a soul.
Bishop was different for me. Different from anyone.
And when his gaze followed Cassandra through the sanctuary as if he couldn’t look away from her, the gnawing ache inside me suddenly had nothing at all to do with hunger.
The other demons had taken seats in the pews on opposite sides of the church. Kraven sat three rows from the front.
“Why’d they send another angel?” he asked sullenly, cutting through the silence that had fallen since we’d arrived here. “I thought we were supposed to be all nice and balanced. Now it’s four against two.”
“An exception was made,” Cassandra replied crisply. “Demons are rarely trustworthy enough to be part of a rare mission like this without causing trouble. Present company excluded, of course.”
“Don’t try to butter me up now, Blondie. You already said you despise demons.” His lips curled to the side. “It’s almost like you’re trying to hurt my tender feelings.”
She grimaced. “I apologize. That was rude of me. Truth is, I’ve never even met one before face-to-face.”
Roth sat in the front row, eyeing her with caution while rubbing the shallow wound at his throat. Demons and angels usually healed much faster than humans, but after the ritual, when the wound was caused by the golden dagger, it was a different story.
It was more dangerous to a supernatural than any other weapon.
“Can you heal Roth?” I asked Cassandra. I needed to say something, to be part of the conversation, not just the helpless mouse who lurked in the corner trying not to squeak. “Not that you’d want to heal him, but I was just wondering if all angels had that ability.”
“We can, in varying degrees of strength. I’m quite a strong healer.” Her gaze shifted to the demon. “Do you want me to heal you?”
Roth shrugged. “Whatever.”
Her expression soured as she moved closer to him. “A real charmer, aren’t you?”
“I try my best.” Roth stiffened as she reached toward him and brushed her fingers against his throat. There was a soft pulse of light and his tanned skin healed right before my eyes.
“You’re very gifted,” Bishop said. His angelic powers were limited due to his fallen status. He watched Cassandra with a wistful envy that made my heart hurt for him.
“Now that that’s done we can deal with the problem at hand.” Cassandra turned to the rest of us. “Your mission was to clear this city of its recent infestation of soul-devouring creatures. Yet one is here with us right now. Why?”
“Good question,” Roth said.
I wouldn’t underestimate this angel. She might look harmless, but she was anything but.
At the same time, I didn’t blame her for her confusion. I’d ask the same thing if I was in her position.
“Samantha’s different,” Bishop said calmly. “She isn’t ruled by her hunger.”
Kraven snorted at that, and I shot a dark look at him.
“Something funny?” Cassandra asked.
“No, ma’am.” He put his laced-up boot-clad feet over the back of a pew bench and crossed his ankles casually. I braced myself, expecting him to share what happened earlier at Crave, but he kept his mouth shut.
Shocker. But I’d reserve my gratitude for later.
Bishop raked his hand through his short, dark hair, his gaze flicking to me for a weighted moment before returning to Cassandra. In the shadowy light of the church, I wasn’t sure if his eyes were glowing or if it was the candlelight.
“Samantha’s important to us,” he continued. “She has a special psychic ability—she can see the searchlights. I can’t because I’m damaged from my fall.”
“I did hear about what happened,” Cassandra said, her brows drawing together. “I’m pleased you seem very capable despite the misfortune that’s befallen you.”
“Doing the best I can.”
“You must be very angry.”
“Someone sabotaged me, sabotaged this entire mission. Now I’m forced to deal with the consequences of having this soul. Can’t say I’m happy about it.”
“Nor should you be. What happened to you is unfair.”
“That’s putting it mildly.” He snorted humorlessly, reminding me uneasily of his brother. “I hold out hope that it’ll be corrected when the mission is complete and I’ll be pulled back with the others.”
“One should always have hope.” Cassandra turned to eye me curiously. “So you have supernatural intuition. It’s rare, but not unheard of. Perhaps you’re mentally stronger than other humans.”
“I do pretty well in school,” I said as lightly as I could. “Mentally, that is.”
Cassandra and the others could never find out what I really was. If demons and angels were forbidden to be together—to such an extent that this love had destroyed my mother and sent my father into the Hollow after her—I knew if anyone learned the truth I’d be in even worse trouble than I already was.
“Samantha isn’t what I expected,” Cassandra finally said. “When they briefed me about grays, I thought they would all be the same.”
“I know.” Bishop crossed his arms over his chest. “We were told we’d find mindless creatures driven by their hungers—created by an anomalous demon who devoured souls. That much was true. But it’s not always like that for those who’ve been kissed—and I believe it’s not only Samantha who’s different. We’ve taken to eliminating only those who’ve completely lost their control and their reason. Anything else would be murder.”
Something heavy inside me lightened at this confirmation, a part that was worried he and the others were indiscriminately slaying grays across the city.
“Is that why you’re here?” I asked her. “Because all the grays haven’t been wiped out of the city yet? Because the barrier’s still up? Are you like...like some sort of quality control agent sent to assess how things are progressing?”
When I got nervous, I started talking and asking questions. I was surprised I’d been able to hold my tongue this long.
“Yeah, Blondie,” Kraven spoke up. “Just what are you doing here?”
“I have a mission, of course. Part of it is to assess how the team is succeeding...” She paused. “Or failing.”
“What is your main mission?” Bishop asked.
She swept her gaze over the four of us before she said anything. “We know the Hollow is not acting as it normally does.”
Just the sound of its name spoken aloud made an unpleasant shiver race through me.
“Are interdimensional gateways to supernatural graveyards ever that reliable?” Bishop’s expression had relaxed and his tone felt almost too light.
Bishop had as snarky a sense of humor as Kraven did, only he usually kept it under wraps as leader. However, he seemed different with Cassandra around. More relaxed, more easygoing. I wondered if it was because he felt comfortable with her here...or if it was just the opposite.
“What have you learned about it?” Cassandra pressed, and she shifted her gaze to Roth.
He shrugged a shoulder. “It opens when it’s supposed to—at the death of a supernatural. Sucks in the garbage. Then it closes up. Other than it spitting the Source of the grays back out to cause this current little citywide infestation, I don’t think it’s changed all that much.”
She frowned. “So it’s true. What has been cast into the Hollow now has a chance to return.”
I didn’t have to look to see that Bishop had drawn closer to me. I felt it.
“We think so,” he said. “If a supernatural finds him or herself in the Hollow, there is the chance for escape. But the barrier is here to keep anything that gets loose in the city contained so we can deal with it.”
“Keeping us trapped here like rats also,” Roth grumbled. “All grays should die. Thinking any other way is just delaying the inevitable. And, for the record, I don’t think that Bishop’s pet gray should be given a break. We don’t know that her soul can be restored.”
“Excuse me?” Cassandra said, her gaze moving to me again. “Your soul is still in existence?”
“The one who took it managed to contain it,” Bishop answered before I could. “We mean to find him and retrieve it.”
She watched me again like a scientist studying a fascinating microbe. “This must be why you’re different, Samantha.” She looked at Bishop. “Right?”
“Perhaps,” he conceded, but he believed I was different due to my secret origins.
Either way, I needed my soul back. It wasn’t even a question.
“Very good.” Cassandra nodded and slowly trailed her gaze over Bishop’s body. It was leisurely enough that the sour taste returned to my mouth. “Despite your personal difficulties, you appear to have everything under control here.”
“I do.”
“Then why are you bleeding right now?”
My eyes shot to him.
“Excuse me?” he asked tightly.
She pointed at his abdomen. “How were you wounded?”
His jaw tensed. “It’s nothing.”
“Bishop!” I exclaimed. “What is she talking about? Are you hurt?”
He didn’t look at me. “No.”
“Pull up your shirt,” Cassandra instructed. “Let me see.”
After another hesitation, he reluctantly reached for the bottom of his long-sleeved T-shirt and raised it up to show his flat, muscled abdomen. My breath lodged in my throat. There were three deep cuts in his skin. The flow of blood had slowed, but it had soaked through his shirt. Since the material was black I hadn’t noticed anything before.
I was horrified that he’d been walking around with these wounds all night and I’d had no idea. “Oh, my God! What happened to you?”
His gaze flicked to me. “Nothing. I was going to get Zach to heal me next time I saw him.”
“Nothing? That’s not nothing! Who did that to you?”
“He did it to himself,” Kraven said with disinterest, exchanging a wry look with Roth. “It’s his new thing.”
All I could do was gape at Bishop. “Why would you cut yourself like that?”
“The pain helps me concentrate,” he said through clenched teeth. “It takes my confusion away. I need to be able to keep my focus, no matter what.”
I clasped my hand over my mouth, stunned. This is what he’d discovered during the days we’d been apart. This is why he hadn’t needed me to touch him to help clear his mind.
Instead of sympathy for his struggle, hot anger surged through me. “That was an unforgivably stupid thing to do!”
His gaze hardened. “I found a solution. I used it.”
A strangled sound escaped my throat. “Yeah, fantastic solution, Bishop. Self-mutilation. Really brilliant.”
Kraven snorted.
It was as if someone had just drawn a blade over my skin as well and pressed down hard. He’d chosen to inflict injury on himself rather than seek me out. The realization stung like hell.
He lowered his shirt, frowning deeply. “I didn’t want you to know about this.”
“Such a martyr,” Kraven drawled. “Spare me the drama.”
“I assume you used the Hallowed Blade to do this. Otherwise, it would have healed by now.” Cassandra was pushing Bishop’s shirt back up. “Hold still.”
She placed both hands over his wounds and a few moments later, with that soft pulse of light from before, the cuts disappeared.
She didn’t let go of him right away, standing intimately close to him.
“Better?” She smiled up at him.
“Better. Thank you.”
“I know how hard it must be for you to deal with the side effects of your soul. I wish I could do more to ease your pain.”
I literally trembled with the effort it took not to close the distance between us and wrench her hands away from him. Even though I knew she’d helped him, I didn’t like how she was touching him.
I’d known Cassandra the Perky Blonde Angel for an hour now and I was insanely and irrationally resentful of her immediate connection with Bishop. I hated feeling this way, all these gnawing doubts in my gut joining my ravenous hunger pains.
Cassandra was beautiful, capable, smart and strong—and she could heal injuries with a mere touch. She was an angel, too. They had everything in common with each other.
Irrational or not, I hated her stupid blond guts.
“Do you give everyone this kind of personal attention?” I asked. “Or just Bishop?”
She glanced at me and gave me a small smile. “I healed Roth, too.”
I felt the heat of Bishop’s gaze on me, but I didn’t look directly at him. I knew every word that came from my mouth made me sound like a petty, jealous girlfriend. I’d always hated girls like that.
I fought hard to keep any discernible emotion out of my eyes. Despite our undeniable connection, Bishop wasn’t my boyfriend. I had no real claim on him at all.
I mean, I didn’t even know his real name.
That’s what my brain knew—that Bishop wasn’t mine.
My heart, however, had a totally different opinion on the subject.
Before anyone could say anything else, the side door clanged shut and a few seconds later, Zach and Connor entered the church sanctuary with us.
Great, I thought drily. The gang’s all here.
Zach was tall and thin, with red hair, freckles on his nose and clear, green eyes. He was kind and thoughtful, and typically did the healing in the group. I knew this from personal experience. Connor was an inch or two shorter, with dark skin, and hair so short I considered it shaved. He always had a joke to help lighten the mood. The two had forged a close friendship since they arrived, and usually went out on patrol together.
“Patrol” was the term for their endless city walks in search of grays who’d lost their minds, their control, who were so driven by their hunger that they became a true and monstrous threat to anyone they crossed paths with. Those grays were targeted for death—their bodies swept away to the Hollow after the deed was done. The golden dagger wasn’t required to kill a gray. They might be supernatural, but they were still mortal.
If I gave in to the kiss much more, I’d also become one of those zombie grays. Which was why what had happened with Colin had frightened me so much. Once a gray turned to that zombie state, there was no coming back from it. The horrible thought of losing myself completely kept me awake at night staring at my ceiling with my sheets pulled right up to my neck.
“We have a visitor,” Connor said with surprise as he noticed Cassandra—and it was very hard not to notice the beautiful blonde. “Hi, there. I’m Connor.”
“A pleasure.” She nodded.
Zach’s previous smile faded at the edges as his gaze widened with recognition. “Cassandra.”
“Zachary. I’m glad to see you made it here all right.”
“Stupid ritual.”
“Totally agree.” She smiled warmly at him. “So this is the entire team?”
“It is,” Bishop confirmed.
“Why are you here?” Zach asked her.
“The same reason as the rest of you. To lend a hand with a difficult situation.”
“Of course.”
She chewed her bottom lip—which struck me as a nervous gesture. It surprised me that she and Zach already knew each other, although I wasn’t sure why. Angels would be associated with each other on some level in Heaven, kind of like going to a big high school. Not everybody knew everyone else, but there were those you saw every day, some you made friends with, some you...didn’t.
I got the strange feeling that these two weren’t exactly best friends.
“Will you be staying with us here at the church?” Zach asked.
Cassandra swept her gaze around the sanctuary, ending with Roth. Her expression soured. “I don’t think so.”
“Oh, come on,” Roth said, grinning darkly. “We can be bunkmates.”
“Definitely not.” She looked at me. “I’ll stay with Samantha.”
I stared at her. “I...uh, I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.”
“Of course it is.”
I cast a look at Bishop, hoping for backup.
There was amusement in his gaze at her suggestion, which didn’t bode well. “I think it’s a good idea. Cassandra can watch over you at night when I’m not around. You’ll be safe from any more...potential problems.”
Kraven snorted again. Honestly, I’d think the demon had a head cold if I didn’t know better. “Right. Wouldn’t want you to have problems, sweetness. That story doesn’t have a happily ever after.”
Bishop shot him a look. “That’s not what I meant.”
The demon waved a dismissive hand. “I wouldn’t know. I barely listen to anything you ever say.”
Don’t fight this, I told myself. Go with the flow. Don’t raise any alarms, not after what happened at Crave.
“Fine,” I said through clenched teeth. “Wouldn’t want to be a problem.”
“Way too late for that,” Roth mumbled.
“Before you go, Cassandra...” Bishop beckoned for her to join him on the other side of the sanctuary. I watched them with a tight feeling in my chest, but I couldn’t hear what they were saying anymore.
Zach moved to stand next to me and he scrubbed a hand through his short, red hair as he also watched the two beautiful angels in their tête-à-tête.
I glanced at him. “So you and Cassandra know each other, huh?”
“Yeah.”
I twisted my index finger into my hair, pulling tight enough to squeeze off my circulation. “I bet when she was human she was, like, a cheerleader. One who stole other girls’ boyfriends. I mean...not that this observation is relevant right now or anything. I’m just saying.”
He grinned at my babblings before the expression faded. “She wasn’t human. She’s one of the hosts.”
I blinked. “One of the what?”
“She was created as an angel.”
I stared at him with shock. “Really?”
He nodded. “Really.”
“Is...is that how it normally is? Or are angels usually human first?”
“They try to keep it balanced.”
“Right. Balance. Can’t forget that.” I worked it over in my head. “How does it happen? Like, do you do enough good deeds in real life and you’re given the job when you die?”
“Pretty much. For me, I saved a kid from drowning. Saved him, but managed to drown myself in the process. I was only a week from graduating from Harvard top of my class. My father always wanted that more than anything—for me to be a lawyer just like him. He was so obsessed with my grades and my...my future. Sometimes I wonder if he’d approve of what I did become.” He glanced at me guiltily. “Sorry, sometimes I still dwell on my past.”
“Dwell away. Believe me, I totally get the parent angst. I’ve lived it all my life.” It was crazy hearing someone talk about their own death, but he said it so matter-of-factly that I found I was able to take it in stride. “When was that? When did you, uh...die?”
“Fifty years ago, give or take. And, yes, I was given the chance when I died to choose between eternal rest or eternal...work.” He shrugged. “I guess I like to keep busy. Never enjoyed taking vacations, anyway. Such a waste of time.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at that, but I quickly sobered. Fifty years ago. And he still looked so young. Wow. “So what happens to your body?”
“We get to keep our human bodies, which are resurrected and healed so they’re even better and stronger than before.” He frowned. “It’s hard to explain if you haven’t experienced it personally. Anyway, our mortal bodies then go through a very intense transition to become celestial and immortal. That part isn’t fun.”
That was when they’d give up their human souls and gain any special abilities as they were transformed into their angelic selves.
In two minutes I’d gotten more information about life as an angel from Zach than I’d gotten from Bishop in two weeks. I was both stunned and grateful for anything I could learn. Now I knew Zach was the go-to guy for stuff like this.
“What about Bishop?” I whispered. “Do you know his story?”
Kraven shot a look at me as he rose from the pew. I wasn’t sure if he was close enough to hear me and Zach talking. He gestured at Roth for them to leave, which they did. I figured they were sick of waiting and they wanted to go patrol. Connor swung into a pew halfway up the aisle.
Zach didn’t speak for a moment. “I’m not sure I want to know his story.”
I tensed. “Why?”
“Heard a few things about him before I left. He wasn’t well liked. There were many who believed he didn’t deserve his placement as an angel.” He shrugged. “I don’t know the truth. All I know is he was a workaholic...really driven. He took every assignment given to him without any argument as if he was trying to prove something. Frankly, I expected him to be a real dick. Maybe the fall knocked a lot of that attitude out of him. But knowing Bishop and Kraven were brothers once...” He sent a look toward the enigmatic angel in question. “I mean, it does make me wonder.”
Me, too. I wondered way too much about the two of them and what it all meant. It had become a driving need inside of me to get to the bottom of the mystery of how and why one brother became a demon and the other an angel.
“Do me a favor, Samantha,” Zach said.
“Sure,” I replied, now distracted. “Of course. What?”
“Don’t fall in love with him.”
My gaze shot to his, and my cheeks immediately heated up. “Excuse me?”
He had the grace to look embarrassed. “Love...well, it makes people do crazy things, even if they’re not crazy to begin with. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
I bit my bottom lip so hard I nearly drew blood. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Cassandra give Bishop a hug.
A freaking hug.
I swallowed hard. “Any other sage advice tonight, Zach?”
“Yeah.” He leaned closer so he could lower his voice to a whisper. “Be careful with Cassandra, too. Hosts are driven by their missions—they take them more seriously than anything else and never question their orders. It’s why they were created—to serve Heaven in any way required. I don’t know why they sent her, but no matter what she might claim, I know it’s for something more than just tagging along on patrol with us.”
It was all he said before Cassandra was there in front of me, ready to leave. I craned my neck to see Bishop again, but she whisked me out of the church before I even had the chance to say goodbye.
Chapter 5
Cassandra had decided to stay with me. At my house. And I seemed to have no choice in the matter.
It made me mad. This wasn’t a friend I wanted to help out. This was an uninvited problem that had barged into my life. If she was just a girl from school I would do my best to avoid her, but she wasn’t.
She might look every bit as harmless as I did, but she was far from it.
I eyed her warily as we walked away from St. Andrew’s and back toward downtown, the outline of the tall office buildings and St. Edward’s Trinity Hospital a glowing beacon in the distance. I drew my coat closer to try to block out the constant chill that made me shiver violently. This was the abandoned part of town, what was once rather industrial, but after the economy tanked a while back, a lot of stores and businesses went bankrupt and shut down. I would definitely think twice about walking around here alone at night—or even with a friend. But Cassandra wasn’t defenseless. She might be blonde and pretty, but she was every bit a warrior as the other guys. Maybe more so.
To tell the truth, she freaked me out.
“You know,” she said after we’d walked in silence for nearly fifteen minutes. “I am getting the distinct impression that you don’t like me very much.”
Unfortunately, I wore my emotions on my face thicker than any makeup.
“You don’t have to be afraid of me,” she added.
I swallowed hard. “I’m not afraid.”
Freaked out wasn’t afraid. It was freaked out.
“If Bishop says you can resist your hungers, then I’m perfectly fine accepting his assessment. To me, you’re the same as any other human. Just a little more interesting.”
“I’m not afraid,” I said again, firmer.
She smiled at that. “If you say so.”
I needed to gain some sort of control here—even if I was only fooling myself. This was going to be a long walk and I’d spent all my bus money on the plate of nachos at the club as well as the cover charge to get in. I’d had no idea I’d be needing to find another way home other than with Sabrina and Kelly.
But here we were. Me hoofing it home on uncomfortable high heels with my new housemate, Cassandra the Perfect Blonde Angel.
“Zach tells me you’re a host,” I said. I was making the assumption it wasn’t a secret. He hadn’t said it was.
She raised an eyebrow. “And do you know what that means?”
Yeah, that I should watch you carefully for your hidden agenda. “You weren’t human first. You were created as an angel.”
“That’s right.”
“That’s hard for me to wrap my head around. No parents. No siblings...not that I have siblings. But, I mean, most people do.” Like Bishop and Kraven, who came immediately and vividly to mind.
She crossed her arms, keeping her gaze on the sidewalk stretching before us. “It’s not as sterile an existence as you might think. I have a sibling—or someone I consider my sibling. She was created at the same time as me. We’re like sisters.”
“Oh.” Yes, that was my fabulously snappy comeback.
There were some people you felt totally comfortable around. Like Carly, for instance. We knew each other so well we could basically finish each other’s sentences. Also, we didn’t have to be constantly talking. It was a comfortable silence.
I didn’t have that with Cassandra. With her it was uncomfortable silence. One that pressed in on all sides like those collapsing rooms in sci-fi movies, threatening to squish the heroine into something the width of a piece of paper.
“Your supernatural intuition has helped the team,” she said. “I’m grateful that Bishop found you.”
“More like the other way around.”
She looked at me with surprise. “You found him?”
I nodded, thinking back to that night—which was wonderful since I’d met Bishop, but also horrible because, well...I’d met Bishop. He represented the best and worst moments of my life, all in such a short time.
“He was having difficulties keeping his thoughts under control.” That was putting it extremely mildly. “Our paths crossed. We realized that when I touched him his mind cleared.”
“Incredible. You must be an asset to the team.”
I shrugged. Kraven’s earlier words echoed in my head: don’t try buttering me up now, Blondie. “I want to help if I can.”
“Now he’s taken to inflicting pain on himself to get the same result.”
I grimaced. “He has to stop that.”
“I agree. It’s barbaric. But I do have to wonder how he realized such a thing would work for him.”
I’d wondered it, too, at first. But I think I’d figured it out.
Bishop must have realized that pain from the dagger helped clear his head when he’d been tortured by the Source of the grays—who just happened to have been my demon aunt, Natalie, my birth father Nathan’s sister. This was another fact that nobody on the team knew but Bishop.
My aunt was anomalous—a demon with a scary glitch created in the conversion from human to infernal being. She had a disturbing taste for human souls and had been branded a problem that needed to be dealt with, especially since souls, both light and dark, were essential to helping keep the universal balance. She was tossed into the Hollow still alive as her punishment. Nathan, too, had an anomaly—according to what Natalie had told me, he could kill with a touch by absorbing life energy.
Seventeen years later, Natalie escaped and arrived here in Trinity. Her strange ability had evolved. Now she was able to create more creatures with her hunger through the “kiss.” And they could do the same. Like a contagious disease. That was why there was a barrier up, so none of us “infected” could spread this disease to the rest of the world. It was an invisible citywide quarantine that would be here till we were all gone.
Natalie had known who I was. And being that I was the daughter of a demon and an angel, she thought that my nexus abilities could help her on her path of destruction and revenge. To do so, she got Stephen to remove my soul in a single kiss. She’d used the metaphor of removing a lid from a box. The soul was the lid keeping my supernatural abilities closed off to me. As soon as it was removed, the contents of this strange and scary box were finally revealed. She’d also promised that she was the only one who could lead me to my birth father, who still existed...somewhere. I figured he was still trapped in the Hollow.
And yet, even though she presented this “upgrade” to me as something good and beneficial, I still had to deal with the hunger of a gray. She’d told me she believed these hungers would fade for me since I wasn’t totally human to begin with.
The evil woman was a liar about many things.
A week had passed since she’d been killed, and, if anything, my hunger was even worse than before.
So Natalie failed. She died before I could learn more information about my birth father’s whereabouts. But before she was killed she’d used Bishop’s dagger to carve him up as duress to get me to do what she wanted. It nearly worked. I’d been very close to doing anything to make her stop torturing Bishop. That must have been when he’d realized that injuries from the dagger would chase away his growing confusion.
“Are you all right?” Cassandra touched my arm, snapping me out of the horrible memory.
“Yeah, fine.” I inhaled shakily and looked up at the sky. It was clear and black and studded with stars. My eyes burned, but I swallowed back my tears.
I tried to put on a brave face, but this was all still very new to me. I’d gone from being a normal high school student trying to keep a high average in order to ensure a bright future—to not knowing if I’d have a future at all.
Fear was not a friend. All it did was weaken me. I couldn’t let myself be weak.
And I flatly refused to be afraid of this angel. I refused to be afraid of my future. I was in control here. I’d find Stephen and everything would be better again. My life would never revert completely to what I’d thought of as normal, but it would give me time to figure everything out. And it would give me a chance to find Carly again. If my aunt had managed to escape from the Hollow, then she damn well could, too.
I needed to change the subject to something more productive. Immediately.
“Can Bishop be helped?” I asked. “He’s not supposed to have fallen. Somebody messed with him. But he gives me the impression this is permanent.”
“There are only a few angels gifted with the ability to burn a new soul into a fallen one. It’s not a process that is typically reversed.”
“But it was a mistake! They have to make an exception for him.”
“I completely agree and I hope that’s what they’ll choose to do.” Her brows drew together. “He’s dealing with these difficulties with admirable grace and strength. He’s rather amazing, isn’t he?”
“Yeah. He is.” I agreed with everything she said, but it still rubbed me the wrong way that she was so impressed by him. I kicked my jealous thoughts into the corner like a pair of dirty socks and tried to ignore them. They weren’t helping. Also, they smelled bad.
We’d finally emerged from the dark and abandoned neighborhood containing the church. This was more populated, more active, with a main road up ahead and lines of restaurants. It wasn’t far from the shopping district known as the Promenade.
Still at least another twenty minutes before we got to my house, though.
I had to keep extra money in my purse for bus fare from now on. Like, seriously. I enjoyed a good walk, the chance to clear my head and get some fresh air, but this was ridiculous.
We passed a couple homeless people sitting with their backs against the fronts of closed-up shops. I scanned their faces quickly, but neither one was the homeless person I’d been searching for.
There was a man named Seth somewhere in this city. Just like Bishop, he was a fallen angel, one who’d fallen a long time ago. I knew he could give insight and help if I introduced him to the team, but I hadn’t seen any sign of him in a week. I’d started to think that maybe he’d just been my imagination.
No, he wasn’t. He was real. Carly had met him, too.
I’ll find you, Seth. I swear I will. I need to talk to you again.
Cassandra slowed to a halt, studying an amorous couple on the side street we’d turned down. The streetlamps cast spooky shadows on the sidewalks and brick walls.
“It’s not polite to stare at people making out,” I told her.
“Is that what they’re doing?”
“Yeah, I mean...” But I stopped talking. At first glance, I’d assumed they were doing just that—two people kissing passionately, so into each other that they ignored the world around them.
But at second glance...
Before I could say anything or do anything, Cassandra walked directly toward the couple and grabbed hold of the man’s arm.
He broke off the kiss and turned to face her. His eyes were black, his skin so pale in the darkness that it seemed luminescent.
He was a gray.
I turned my horrified gaze to his girlfriend—or, victim, rather—who looked just as Colin had earlier. Glazed, dazed, with the telltale black lines branching around her mouth. She collapsed to the ground.
No one but us had witnessed this. We were fifty feet from the main road.
The gray looked to be in his early twenties, and was handsome when his pallor returned to normal and his eyes shifted back to human.
“Can I help you?” he asked calmly, wiping his hand over his mouth to remove traces of his victim’s lipstick.
Cassandra’s hands clenched into tight fists at her sides. “I know what you are.”
“Do you?” He raised an eyebrow at the blonde angel who’d stopped him from continuing his dark kiss.
The girl who’d fallen to the ground wasn’t moving. Her eyes remained glazed, and she wasn’t snapping out of it as Colin thankfully had. The black lines remained around her mouth.
“Oh, God. No,” I whispered.
This gray had taken her entire soul in that kiss, and she hadn’t been strong enough to survive it.
“She’s dead,” I said, louder. My stomach convulsed. “You killed her!”
“Too bad,” he said without emotion. “She was very tasty.”
Cassandra’s eyes flashed with rage. “You’re evil. A plague upon this city. Upon this entire world. You must be destroyed.”
He laughed. “Yeah, good luck with that.”
She didn’t pull out a weapon, but she stalked closer to him. I held my breath, watching, trying not to look at the dead girl again. I hadn’t seen anything like this before. I’d seen the kiss before, I’d been guilty of the kiss myself, but I’d never seen it kill anyone.
This was proof that it could. That what I was, and what I could do—that this ravenous hunger I felt every hour of every day—was one hundred percent evil.
I felt no pity for this gray. Instead, all I felt was rage. I wanted Cassandra to kill him right here and right now. She was a warrior like the others; there was no doubt in my mind about that.
But as she drew closer to him, the gray watched her with open amusement. “You’re one of the people I’ve been hearing about. The ones trying to stop us from having any fun in this town.”
She launched herself at him, her hands out as if prepared to grab his throat and strangle him. But with a flick of his wrist, he backhanded her. It was so hard that she went flying through the air and hit the wall on the opposite side of the street with a violent smacking sound.
Cassandra crumpled to the ground unconscious.
I spun to face the gray, stunned. “What did you—?”
He grinned at me. “Impressed?”
I rushed toward Cassandra and snatched a jagged piece of wood from the side of the road, holding it in front of me.
The gray watched me carefully. “What exactly do you think you’re doing?”
“Defending myself from a killer.” My voice shook.
He laughed. “Seriously? You’re one of us, in case you weren’t aware. I saw you last week with Stephen at Crave.”
Suddenly, I recognized him. He was one of my Aunt Natalie’s minions who’d hung out at the nightclub. This was one of the grays who’d held Bishop in place while Natalie tortured him.
Fear and hatred stormed inside me.
“You’re not supposed to feed!” I held the sharp piece of wood out in front of me like I was a vampire slayer. I wanted to check Cassandra and make sure she was all right, but I knew I couldn’t turn my back on this monster for a second.
“I didn’t. Not for a long time. I tried to follow the rules.”
“Why are you so strong? Grays aren’t any stronger than humans. What are you?”
He studied me without looking the least bit concerned about my impromptu weapon. “You know butterflies start as ugly caterpillars, right?”
My heart pounded so hard I could barely hear over the sound of it. “Is this science class?”
He shrugged. “You need to come with me. We can be friends.”
“I don’t want any more friends. Not like you.” Something occurred to me. My gaze snapped to his. “Where’s Stephen? I need to find him!”
His lips stretched over straight, white teeth. “Come with me and we’ll all have a nice chat.”
Crap. Even the possibility that he knew where to find Stephen was like throwing out tantalizing bread crumbs and then asking me to follow him to the loaf. But I couldn’t trust him.
“No way. Tell me where Stephen is.”
“Nah. Not if you’re hanging around friends like these.” He flicked a glance at Cassandra.
I swallowed hard, not sparing more than a worried glance at the unconscious angel. “Why are you different than other grays?”
“Am I?” He gave me a grin—one of those frustrating ones that showed that he believed he knew something I didn’t know...and he wasn’t talking.
Even from a distance, I felt his evil like thick slime spreading over my skin. He had no remorse about the dead girl lying four feet away from him. Not even a glimmer.
It was as if he had become one of the zombie grays—but he wasn’t mindless. It shouldn’t have been possible.
Whatever he was, it was wrong. Dark. Malicious. He knew right from wrong, yet he’d chosen to destroy someone’s life anyway. He might have control, but he didn’t bother to use it.
When he stepped closer to me I took a shaky step back. Cassandra was in my sightline, but she still wasn’t moving.
“You need to join with the people who understand you,” he said. “Don’t get caught on the wrong side of this tug-of-war.”
“How many are left?” I asked, my voice choked. “How many grays?”
“Have you seen the papers? They’re calling us a kissing mob. A gang of people who randomly kiss strangers. They have no idea what we can really do. What we really are.”
I’d seen it. It was buried in the Trinity Chronicle as an amusing fluff piece on page fifteen. Nobody realized what a threat it was. Nobody realized that the dozens of people who’d gone missing or turned up mysteriously dead in recent weeks—articles that ran much closer to the front of the newspaper—were related. It was a mystery. There were no signs of trauma found on the bodies, apart from the mysterious black lines left around their mouths. Those lines didn’t fade on a dead victim.
“Give that to me before you hurt somebody.” He looked so calm it was maddening.
When he reached for the piece of wood, I slashed it at him, cutting his arm.
He snarled at me. “Bitch!”
This time when he grabbed for my weapon I slashed the palm of his hand. Blood dripped to the ground as pain flashed across his expression.
He whacked me across the face so hard that the makeshift stake flew out of my hand, and hit the wall. White-hot pain momentarily blinded me.
I opened my mouth to scream, but he clamped his hand so tight over my mouth I thought he might break my teeth.
He began to drag me down the street. “I think you need to feed. I can set you up. Your head will get a lot clearer soon. Promise.”
“Let go of me!” My screams were muffled by his hand. I tried to bite him. I fought against him, scratching and clawing, but his bleeding arm may as well have been made of steel. This guy wasn’t human. Not in any way. And he was more than just a gray.
If he shoved me in a small room with a human, based on how I’d dealt with Colin earlier, I wasn’t sure if I was strong enough to resist. Maybe for a little while, but not forever. It would be my worst fear come to life.
Suddenly, Bishop stepped out from behind the corner up ahead. For a moment I thought it was all my imagination, that my brains had been rattled when the gray hit me. But it was true.
He was here.
And he looked mad enough to kill.
Chapter 6
My heart leaped at the sight of him.
Bishop’s gaze was narrowed and dangerously fixed on the gray. “Take your hands off her right now.”
The gray removed his hand from my mouth, instead twisting it painfully into my hair to hold me still. I shrieked. “Is this the rescue party? Go check on the blonde. She’s one of yours. This one...she’s one of mine.”
“Wrong,” I snarled.
Bishop’s eyes flashed bright blue. The dagger was already clenched in his grip. “Roth, check on Cassandra. I’ll handle this.”
Roth, who’d been standing just behind Bishop, moved toward Cassandra just as the gray shoved me away from him. I slammed hard into the wall, knocking my breath away and rattling my bones. I wheezed for a second and struggled to stay on my feet. This time, I tasted blood.
I whirled around to see Bishop charge the gray, dagger in hand. Much better than a piece of sharp wood.
“Be careful!” I yelled.
He wasn’t being very careful. He didn’t hesitate—just as he hadn’t hesitated with Cassandra.
At the last second, the gray brought his foot up to smash Bishop right in the face, knocking him backward. He landed hard on his back, but leaped back up a moment later, shaking himself off.
“Interesting,” Bishop said with a frown. He was now bleeding from a vicious cut on his forehead.
“Good word. Interesting. I’ll take it.” The gray grinned. “And I’ll take the girl when I’m finished with you and your friends. She’ll be happier with her own kind.”
“You can try to take her. You’ll fail.”
“We’ll see.”
Bishop studied him with narrowed eyes. His gaze flicked to the victim lying nearby before grimly returning to the gray. “What are you? I thought you were a gray, but you’re something else.”
“Nope. Just a run of the mill ‘gray.’” He even made sarcastic air quotes as his smile stretched. It was a term made up by Heaven and Hell, not by grays themselves. “Time changes things. By not slaughtering all of us last week, you gave us the time we needed to adapt, to evolve. We’re glad you sent Natalie’s ass back to the Hollow. She was a serious buzzkill.”
“Bishop,” Roth growled. “We need Zach. Her back’s broken.”
I stared at him with horror. I didn’t think a broken back could kill an angel—only being stabbed by the golden dagger could do that—but if she didn’t get healed quickly it could cause serious problems. She could be paralyzed.
Bishop swore under his breath. “Let’s get this over with.”
He stormed toward the gray again, but was deflected. He landed hard on his shoulder this time and I heard a sickening crunch. His dagger skittered across the pavement away from him.
“Bishop!” I yelled, terrified he’d been hurt as badly as Cassandra.
Roth got to his feet and rushed the gray but the gray easily slammed his fist into the demon’s face.
I watched this with sheer disbelief. Grays weren’t supposed to be any stronger or any more dangerous than humans. Except for the kiss.
But this guy...
He’d just taken down two angels and a demon without even breaking a sweat. What was going on here?
Bishop struggled to get to his feet, but the guy slammed his foot down on Bishop’s broken shoulder. Bishop let out a roar of pain and rage.
Without thinking, I started for him, fists clenched.
“Stay back, Samantha,” Bishop snarled. “Don’t get closer.”
My steps faltered. I trembled as I searched the side street, looking for something that might help.
The gray laughed loudly, and then glanced at me. “Ready to go?”
No. But I was ready to kill him. Seeing Bishop hurt had brought something out from deep inside of me—something that saw red and wanted to inflict injury.
But before I could take even another step closer—against Bishop’s wishes—the golden dagger sliced through the air, hitting the gray directly in the chest. He snarled with pain, then yanked it out and threw the now-bloody weapon away from him.
I spun to see who’d thrown it. Zach had arrived and was crouched beside Cassandra. His eyes blazed bright blue in the darkness. Bishop’s weren’t the only eyes that did that; it was an angel thing.
Zach had thrown the knife with perfect aim. And here I thought he was a peaceful angel who saved kids from drowning and could heal injuries.
He was also a deadly warrior when necessary.
For a horrible second I thought the dagger’d had no affect at all on this gray, that along with his super strength, he’d somehow become immortal and omnipotent.
Not the case.
He dropped to his knees. Blood soaked the front of his white shirt. He sent a hate-filled glare in my direction.
“Take a good look,” he growled. “This is your future whether you like it or not. Soon enough, they’ll kill you, too.”
He shuddered, then he fell forward onto the pavement.
There wasn’t even a moment to catch my breath before the Hollow appeared out of nowhere and opened wide.
I’d seen it twice before. Both times it had scared me so much I could barely function.
Seeing a black, swirling vortex appear out of absolutely nowhere wasn’t the most natural sight in the world. It opened like a mouth with a bottomless hunger, ready to take whatever supernatural was in its path. It was triggered by a death, by blood, but it didn’t seem to differentiate between the living and the dead. If you were in its path, then you were in serious trouble.
It was torture to think that Carly was in there somewhere—still alive. And I had no idea how to get her back out again.
The gray was closest. With fingerlike tendrils of living, breathing darkness, the Hollow reached out like a horrible hand and pulled him into the vortex. I swear, it was bigger this time, and stronger, as if all of the supernaturals it had taken had made it gain a few pounds. It shifted as if scanning the area, stopping on me for a brief moment. I swear, the Hollow looked at me. Right at me.
“Carly!” I screamed. “Carly! Where are you?”
Maybe if she could hear me. Maybe...
The horrific swirling gateway began to inch closer to me...nearer and nearer...
But then Bishop grabbed hold of me and tried to drag me back, his teeth clenched with pain from his massive shoulder injury. It was enough to snap me out of my daze. I held on to him tightly. The Hollow wouldn’t hesitate to grab me. It had tried before, and I had the strangest feeling that it was annoyed that it hadn’t succeeded.
“We’ll find Carly,” he shouted, barely loud enough for me to hear him over the roar of the Hollow. “But it won’t be tonight. I’m not losing you like this.”
To my right, I saw a horrific sight. Cassandra’s unconscious body was sliding across the pavement toward the vortex that had moved away from me. It reached for her, black smoky fingers curling around her ankles.
But then seemingly out of nowhere, Roth launched himself through the air, tackling Cassandra, and rolling them both out of range.
With no one left in its sights, the Hollow began to swirl smaller and smaller until it finally, thankfully, disappeared completely. The thunderous sound—like being in the middle of a tornado—vanished like somebody had pressed the off button on a gigantic stereo.
I still clung to Bishop. He pulled back from me, checking my face, my arms, making sure that I wasn’t hurt. His brows were drawn tightly together and his left arm hung slackly at his side.
“Are you okay?” he demanded.
I fought to breathe normally, but I nodded. “Bishop, your shoulder...”
“It’s nothing.”
“It’s shattered.”
“I’ll live. But you...” His gaze moved over my face, his brows tight together. “You’re not seriously hurt.”
“No. But Cassandra is.”
He swore under his breath. Then, with a last searching look, he pushed up off the ground and went to Cassandra’s side.
It was so quick I’d barely had a chance to let the tantalizing scent of his soul affect me. I wished I could say that after what had happened with the gray it didn’t bother me, but it had. My hunger surged forward. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to push it back.
“Can you fix her?” Bishop’s words to Zach were tight. Roth, Zach and Bishop gathered in a circle around Cassandra.
I stayed where I was, a safe distance away, watching tensely.
“I think so.” Zach gently rolled Cassandra over onto her stomach.
I’d experienced something extremely similar nearly two weeks ago when a searchlight had led me to Roth. When he’d been “reborn” after the ritual, he’d immediately sensed I was a gray. And he’d been sent here to kill grays. He quickly and efficiently broke my neck. I’d been only moments away from death when Zach managed to heal me. And I swear, when an angel heals you, it’s as if nothing ever happened. Better than that, really. My neck had honestly never felt so good. Still did. He was like a Heaven-sent chiropractor.
“Cassandra, can you hear us?” Bishop asked, touching her shoulder gently.
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Hold still and let Zach help you.”
“All right. Go ahead.” Her pain-filled eyes narrowed. “And hurry up.”
I couldn’t help but smile shakily at that. The angel was very bossy and it didn’t matter what the situation was. I wondered if all host angels were the same.
Zach pushed her sweater up farther to reveal more of her winged-tattoo-like imprint, identical to Bishop’s and the other angels’. Then he placed his hands on Cassandra’s spine and closed his eyes. His hands began to glow white. Cassandra cried out, and every muscle in my body tensed in sympathy.
I remembered that this felt worse before it felt better—like fire burning straight through your flesh and into your bones.
Finally, Zach returned her sweater to its regular position and helped her to her feet. She wavered unsteadily for a moment, but then got her balance.
“You’re next,” Zach said, before he quickly worked to heal Bishop’s broken shoulder and facial cuts and scrapes.
This was close. Too close. That gray had wanted to crush him into dust right in front of me.
Cassandra looked at Zach. “Thank you.” Then at Bishop. “Both of you.”
Roth cleared his throat. She flicked a glance at him.
“I saved you, sweetheart,” he told her flatly. “You almost got sucked into the Hollow.”
Her expression tightened, but she finally nodded. “Thank you, Roth.”
“Yeah, whatever.” He laughed. “I saved an angel’s ass. Can’t believe it. Good thing you’ve got a nice ass.”
Her cheeks turned red before she looked at me. “I apologize for failing you.”
I stared at her, stunned. “Failing me? He knocked you out cold.”
“It’s unacceptable.” She shook her head, looking angry at herself. “I should have expected—”
“Expected something like that?” Bishop said, crossing his arms over his chest. “You’re not omniscient. You didn’t know. That was different than anything we’ve ever been faced with before.”
“It was horrible.” She let out a shaky sigh and let Bishop put his arm around her shoulders. She leaned into him.
Despite everything we’d just experienced, the sight made my face start to burn. I fought hard not to let my inner flare of jealousy show on the surface. “He knew where Stephen was.”
Bishop’s gaze flicked to mine. “Did you want us to let him live?”
My attention brushed against the dead girl nearby and my throat closed. “No. He was a monster. But I—I don’t understand why he was that strong.”
He let go of Cassandra to come stand right in front of me. I studied the ground, feeling his gaze on me, before I finally looked up to meet it. He raised his hand as if to touch me, but then his hand dropped to his side, clenching into a fist. “I haven’t seen anything like that before. Feeding too much...it must make them very strong just before it destroys their minds.”
“Maybe he was about to change,” Roth said. “Maybe this was the last gasp of strength before he lost himself completely.”
“I’m glad Cassandra will be staying with you,” Bishop said. “She can keep you safe.”
“I’ll do my very best,” Cassandra said softly.
She hadn’t exactly kept me safe a minute ago—or herself, for that matter. That gray would have easily dragged me out of here if Bishop hadn’t shown up. But I couldn’t hold it against her. That gray’s strength had been a surprise to all of us.
“Go home. Get some rest,” Bishop said to me, then turned to Cassandra. “We’ll talk more tomorrow.”
She nodded. “Again, thank you for your assistance. I thought we were on our own.”
“Bishop tends to stalk from a discreet distance,” I said. “You’ll hardly notice him, really.”
His gaze snapped to mine and a smile tugged at his lips. “I’m not stalking you. Never have.”
The smile helped warm me. “Watching from a distance. Secretly observing my every move. I think you might need a dictionary, angel.”
“You’re welcome, by the way.”
My cheeks heated again, for a completely different reason this time. “Thank you.”
Finally, with effort, I tore my gaze from his and began walking away. Cassandra caught up to me a block later. We exchanged a look, and I couldn’t help but notice her expression and mood were much graver than they had been when we’d left the church.
“You okay?” I asked.
She just nodded, keeping her eyes on the path ahead of us.
Even for an angel, being broken and then healed again had to be a traumatic experience. I’d planned to dislike her forever, especially due to her immediate connection with Bishop, but I found I couldn’t after what had happened.
I wasn’t saying I liked her, but despising her for being perfect, blonde and beautiful wasn’t a good enough reason for absolute and immediate dismissal.
I wasn’t positive, but I was pretty sure Bishop followed us back to my house at a discreet distance.
I’d only been kidding before about him being my stalker.
He was definitely my guardian angel.
Chapter 7
So much had happened tonight, it was hard to believe it was only a little after nine o’clock when we finally arrived at the small bungalow I shared with my mother.
Home sweet home. I had to say, just the sight of the familiar house helped calm my nerves. Even considering who was with me.
I’d lived here all my life. Until a couple years ago, it was me, my mother and my father. Since the separation, it was just me and Mom. My father lived in England now. I only saw him rarely. Even the emails had started to come with less frequency than they used to.
It would make me sad if I let myself think about it too much.
“Here we are,” I said, stopping at the end of the driveway. My mother’s car was here. I guess she wasn’t working late tonight. Miracles happen.
Cassandra had been very quiet the rest of the way here, as if lost in her thoughts. Her expression revealed nothing about how she felt about having her back broken by a gray...and now voluntarily sharing a house with another one.
In the silence, I’d found it impossible not to think about that gray’s victim. One moment swept away by a kiss from a sexy stranger, the next feeling your life fading away to nothing. A kiss of death.
She didn’t have a chance.
I swallowed past the thick lump in my throat and tried to focus on something else, anything else. I’d decided to tell my mother that Cassandra was one of my friends from school. That her parents were gone for a few days, and she was afraid to be alone.
Not perfect, but it would do. My mother would believe it. She believed a lot of things without asking too many questions.
I let Cassandra into the house, eyeing her warily as she brushed past me. She studied everything her gaze landed on as if assessing it for a future report. The bamboo blind at the window, the colorful rug by the front door. The framed photos on the walls, which no longer included my father.
My mother pretended not to dwell on the divorce, but I knew it hadn’t been her decision. My father hadn’t moved across the ocean just to work at the London branch of his law firm...he’d moved there to be with a beautiful blonde British intern half his age. He almost never emailed anymore and I couldn’t remember the last time we talked on the phone.
I tried to follow Mom’s lead and not dwell on things like that. But it made me understand my mother’s angst.
The sight of empty wine bottles lined up to go into the recycling bin made me wince. Cassandra didn’t seem to notice, but I did. There were way more this week than usual. And there were usually too many.
I wasn’t the only one in the family with a growing addiction to something unhealthy.
“Sam, I’m glad you’re home,” my mother greeted me warmly as we entered the living room. I wasn’t surprised to see that she held a large glass of white wine. On her lap was a stack of papers she was going through. She was a real-estate agent, a job she was good at and put long hours into, seven days a week. I used to complain—to myself, to her, to anyone who’d listen—about how obsessed she was with the job and making money and how she had no time for me.
Since I’d learned I was adopted, she’d tried very hard to mend our shaky relationship by making sure we spent a little time together every day. She assured me that she was a great listener if I had any problems, and that she was here for me, no matter what. And yet, there were more wine bottles by the door than usual.
Stress showed itself in different ways.
I was on edge, but knew I had to hold it together. This was the one place I could still feel like myself. Home was my touchstone for being normal.
And now there was an angel here—one who’d never even been human before. There was nothing normal about that. My mother’s gaze moved to her as she entered the room.
“Hi, Mom,” I said, clearing my throat. “This is Cassandra. She’s a friend of mine.”
“A pleasure to meet you, Cassandra. Call me Eleanor.” My mother got up from her chair and came over to shake Cassandra’s hand. There was a genuine smile on her face. “I’m so glad Sam’s hanging out with new friends. After what happened with Carly, I know the past week’s been rough.”
My eyes started to sting immediately at the mention of my best friend. Mom was one of the people who believed in the “running away with a boyfriend” story. Most brushed it off as the act of a rebellious teenager. But Mom has seen me cry over this and she knew I was taking Carly’s absence hard. She thought I saw it as a betrayal of our friendship.
She was wrong. It was a tragedy.
“Nice to meet you, too,” Cassandra said. “You have a lovely home.”
“Thank you.”
Well, weren’t we all pleasant and polite?
“I, um, need to ask a favor...” I began, ready to launch into my cover story. But Cassandra took over for me before I said another word. She still held my mother’s hand and she looked deep into her eyes.
“I’m going to be staying here with you and Samantha for a little while, Eleanor,” she said smoothly. “It’s nothing to concern yourself with. Do you understand?”
My mother nodded slowly. “I understand.”
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Cassandra was using angelic influence to mess with my mother’s mind. Zach and Connor could do the same thing, but only in emergencies.
“Are you girls hungry?” my mother asked, taking a quick sip of her wine. “I got home late and haven’t had dinner yet. I mean, I know Sam’s hungry. She’s always hungry lately. I’m shocked she’s remained so skinny with the way she eats.”
This just got better and better.
“Yes.” The angel put a hand on her stomach and cocked her head as if trying to sense her bodily needs. “I believe I am hungry.”
“I’ll order some Chinese delivery.”
“Delightful.” Cassandra took a seat in a La-Z-Boy recliner and leaned forward to flip absently through today’s paper. “Eleanor, you say that Samantha is hungry lately. What does she eat?”
I tensed at the question, and the meaning behind it. Just because she’d also given me a pass as a gray didn’t mean that she was finished investigating me. I learned over. “Not what you might be thinking.”
No souls, thank you. Well, except for Colin’s earlier. And Bishop’s last week.
I could try to convince myself that they didn’t really count. I hadn’t hurt them—it had only been tiny nibbles. But it was still wrong.
However, compared to the murderous gray we’d been faced with tonight...
The thought of the glazed eyes of the dead girl with the black lines around her mouth made my blood run cold.
“You name it, she eats it.” My mother fought against her grin, but lost. “I can barely keep the fridge stocked anymore.”
I gave her a look. “You’re so funny I forgot to laugh.”
“Better keep a lid on it if you can. I might need to save my grocery money to pay for other necessities.” Since she was still grinning, I assumed she was trying to be funny. She shouldn’t give up her day job to become a comedian. “I’m having trouble selling a house I thought would go quickly. It’s on the east side right near the city line. Huge piece of property that’s been abandoned for months. Worth two million.”
“What’s the problem with it?” I asked absently.
Cassandra continued to scan the newspaper, and then picked up the TV Guide to flip through it as if fascinated. If she’d never left Heaven before I suppose all of this was new to her.
“There’s a rumor circulating that it’s haunted.” She pulled her cell phone from her Coach bag. “Which is ridiculous. It seems perfectly normal to me.”
“No mournful moans or rattling of chains?”
“Nothing. Although, with it being Halloween in a few days, you’d think that might be a selling feature.” She laughed at this, then left the room to call the Chinese restaurant.
Ghosts in abandoned houses. I wondered if that was even possible—if ghosts really existed.
Not my problem. I had enough to worry about without adding to the list.
When the food arrived, and the house began smelling like Chinese food—which was, in a word, divine—Cassandra had a big grin on her face.
“My first meal here,” she told me. “It’s incredible.”
My mother gave her a strange look. “You kids and your diets.”
Cassandra scanned the dishes as I piled a plate for myself high with food. “What is that? A ball of chicken? Ingenious!”
Later, Cassandra gleefully experienced an hour of television, while I could barely sit still. I wasn’t sure what I should do right now, but I felt like sitting here doing nothing was an incredible waste of time. That gray tonight reminded me how much trouble I was in.
I wouldn’t become like that. I wouldn’t lose my mind again like I had with Colin. I wouldn’t hurt anybody.
I had this under control.
Stephen was still somewhere in this city. I would find him. And he would damn well give me back my soul before it was too late. My future was still bright and sparkly.
Well, maybe not sparkly. But definitely bright.
When it was time for bed, my mother showed Cassandra the upstairs guest room where she’d be staying.
“Thank you, it’s perfect,” Cassandra said, putting a hand on her arm. “Listen, I’ve been thinking about this all night, Eleanor. I’d like you to do something for me.”
“What?”
She gazed into my mother’s eyes. “I think you should go on vacation somewhere really nice. You can leave tomorrow morning. Any work you have can wait until you get back. Do you understand?”
I gaped at her, stunned silent that she was using angelic influence on my mother again.
“Yes, I understand.” My mother nodded. “My goodness, a vacation. What a wonderful idea! It’s been so long—I don’t think I can even remember the last vacation I took. I think it was Florida, four years ago. Remember that, Sam?”
“I...uh, remember. But...are you sure this is a good idea? A vacation right now?”
“No, it’s not a good idea.” She stroked her honey-blond hair back from her face. Her eyes sparkled. “It’s a great idea! I’m going to Hawaii. I’ve always wanted to go there. I’ll take a surfing lesson...and lie on the beach and read a book. Thank you, Cassandra. Such a wonderful suggestion. Will you be all right here without me?”
Cassandra nodded. “We’ll be fine.”
“I’m going to go pack!” My mother kissed me on my cheek, then hurried off in the direction of her bedroom. I waited for her door to close before I spun around to face the angel.
“Just who do you think you are?”
Her eyebrows went up. “Excuse me?”
“You think you can just influence people to do whatever you want them to do? Like it’s nothing?” Every decision that had been made, taken out of my hands, forced upon me—this was the final straw. I wasn’t just going to smile and nod and try to be easy to get along with so nobody saw me as a threat. This was totally unacceptable.
She looked at me as if confused by my reaction. “It’s better this way. Having her here puts her in danger. You must realize that, don’t you?”
Of course I realized that. I wasn’t stupid. “I’m not saying you’re wrong.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“It’s just...not cool,” I sputtered. “You’re new around here—a guest! And this is my house...and my mother! You don’t get to make the rules!” I turned away and went to my room, slamming the door behind me.
Immediately, I felt like a petulant child who’d just thrown a temper tantrum. But I couldn’t help it. I tried to be on my best behavior and fit in, to not make any trouble, even when my life was falling apart. But she’d pushed me too far.
Cassandra had succeeded in making me feel utterly powerless. And that, in turn, made me realize I had no control over anything in my life.
I sank to the floor next to my bed and pulled my knees close to my chest. The three full plates of Chinese food I’d eaten sat heavily in my stomach, threatening to come back up.
Cassandra pushed open my bedroom door a couple minutes later. It wasn’t a big surprise that she didn’t knock first.
I looked up at her, guarded. “What do you want now?”
She pressed her hand against the door frame and looked awkward about coming all the way into my room. Again, her assessing gaze swept over my furniture, my vanity, my discarded clothes that hadn’t hit the hamper. I might get straight As, but I wasn’t what anyone would describe as the neatest person in the world.
“It’s been a difficult evening,” she said. “For you, for me. For all of us. I also sensed a dynamic between you and the other members of the team that perhaps I’ve disrupted in some way.”
I stared up at her, trying to process the strange way she spoke. “You’re a bit of a Vulcan, aren’t you?”
She looked confused. “A...what?”
“A Vulcan. It’s a Star Trek thing. Emotionless aliens who like to talk very proper.”
Her frown deepened. “I’m not an alien. I’m an angel.”
I sighed. “An angel who’s never had a chicken ball before.”
“Which was delicious. And the red dippable goo they came with?” She beamed. “Amazing.”
“If you say so.”
She came all the way into my room and sat on the edge of my bed. She looked at me very seriously. “I know you don’t like me.”
“I never said that.” Not in front of her, anyway.
Her shoulders sank. “That gray this evening. He hurt me...and he hurt you. I thought I could handle it, but he defeated me easily. Too easily.”
“It wasn’t your fault. Grays aren’t normally like that. He was a total freak of nature.” One that scared the hell out of me, to say the least. I was glad he was dead and he couldn’t hurt anyone else.
“That demon had to save me.” She shuddered. “And he said I have a nice ass. How crude.”
“That’s Roth.”
“Is he...” Her brows drew together “...as horrible as he seems?”
I was about to agree with that statement wholeheartedly, but then I thought about it. “I don’t know. Demons are supposed to be evil and horrible. I don’t like him. He’s a jerk, but he’s part of the team. He’s doing his thing. And he did save your butt.” I thought about what little I knew about Kraven. “Demons who’ve been humans before...they have stories behind them. They’re not a hundred percent bad. At least, I don’t think they are. I mean, I guess they did some really bad stuff when they were alive in order to become a demon. Right?”
“I’m sure they did.”
I remembered Zach’s story about the good deed with the drowning kid, and that giving him the chance to become an angel. I figured it would be the exact opposite—a bad deed—to become a demon. “It’s bizarre, really. Because, as far as I’m concerned, demons should be totally evil to the core.”
That was one of the things that freaked me out the most. How you couldn’t tell who was a demon and who was an angel. How similar they looked. Only their imprints confirmed what they really were.
“In the beginning,” I continued, “I assumed Bishop was a demon by the way he handled that dagger of his.”
“Yes, he does have a way with the Hallowed Blade.”
My ears perked up at this name. She’d called it that before. “Is that what it’s called?”
She nodded gravely. “All angels of death are assigned one.”
I blinked. “Angel of...what?”
She glanced down at me sprawled on the floor. “Angel of death. Bishop is one of Heaven’s assassins, which is why he’s one of the few officially authorized to carry such a dangerous blade.”
“Oh.” I could barely find my voice.
“Didn’t you know this about him?”
“No. It—it hadn’t come up.” It was a whisper. I couldn’t manage much more than that. A piece of information like this was enough to knock the breath right out of me.
“That’s why he was chosen to lead this mission. His record shows that he doesn’t hesitate when it comes to—”
“Killing,” I finished for her, feeling sick inside. “The ritual...and dealing with the grays...”
She nodded. “If his departure hadn’t been tampered with, I have no doubt that the grays would all be...” She trailed off and looked at me sheepishly. “Of course, I’m sure an exception would still be made for those who don’t feed and whose souls still exist intact. Somewhere. He wouldn’t have just killed you indiscriminately just because you’re, well...one of them.”
I swallowed hard. “I hope you’re right.”
Bishop’s mission here in Trinity required someone with the right instincts. No hesitation. It had always made my blood turn to ice, seeing him at work. That determined, emotionless expression that came over his face just before the blade met its mark.
I’d known Bishop was dangerous, but...an actual angel of death?
Holy hell.
“I should rest.” Cassandra stood up and moved toward the door. “Tomorrow I need to get a fresh start.”
“Cassandra...” I said, my voice still barely audible. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course. What?”
I took a deep breath and looked right at her. “What’s the real reason you were sent here?”
A shaky smile formed on her lips. “I’m here to lend a hand to the team during this difficult mission. Why else? Good night, Samantha.”
“Good night.”
She left, but not before I’d managed to get a small glimpse of her thoughts. It was another one of my newly uncovered talents. I could read a demon or angel’s mind...if they weren’t actively trying to block me. All I had to do was look into their eyes and concentrate hard.
Cassandra lied. She wasn’t here just to help the team. She had her own mission, an entirely separate one.
I really wished I knew what it was.
* * *
It took me hours before I finally drifted off to sleep. My head was a horrific mass of nightmares about evil grays and dead girls, before they finally parted for something much more pleasant.
A dream about Bishop.
He was seated across from me at a small wooden table in the middle of a wasteland—a cracked, dry desert that stretched as far as the eye could see. There was nothing in sight to the horizons all around us. The sky was a flat, pale gray, like a coating of paint.
“Where are we?” I asked.
“Good question.” He wore black. Black jeans, black T-shirt. The darkness only made the color of his eyes stand out more—like sapphires.
What Cassandra had told me about his job in Heaven was so far in the distance now I couldn’t remember the details. I knew it had disturbed me, but at the moment it was the last thing on my mind. All I felt was happy. Happy to see him. Happy we were alone—no matter where this was. “I’m dreaming right now, aren’t I?”
“You are.” He smiled—an easy smile that made my heart do an automatic flip.
“So this isn’t real? Not some sort of mind meld?”
“No. Just a dream. Your dream.”
I looked down at myself to see I wore a fancy red dress, gauzy and big and silky, like a ball gown. I’d never worn anything so extravagant in my entire life.
“You’re beautiful,” Bishop said.
My gaze snapped to his. “It’s just the dress. It’s not me.”
“You’re wrong. It is you.” There was something in his eyes that made me believe he meant it. “I wish I could kiss you right now.”
“You can kiss me here.” If this was just a dream, then nothing I said or did counted. I liked the idea of that—total freedom. “Normally in my dreams...we do more than just kiss.”
His brows went up. “Really.”
I nodded, fighting a smile.
“You want to do more than just kiss me, Samantha?”
“Maybe I do.” My heart pounded. The endless bravery I normally had in my dreams seemed to be escaping like sand sliding through my fingers. “But there’s a problem.”
“What?”
“There’s a severe balance of power missing in this...whatever this is between us. I know hardly anything about you. You know everything about me. I have no power over you at all.”
“Wrong. You took part of my soul. You know I’m drawn to you like nothing I can control, which is why I’ve tried—and failed—to stay away. Even when I do keep my distance you can still see through my eyes whenever you want to.”
This was another little skill I had. After I’d kissed Bishop and taken part of his soul, there were the odd times I got flashes of what he saw—even if we were nowhere close to each other. I couldn’t read his mind or feel his emotions, but I could see through his eyes.
“It’s not whenever I want to,” I said. “It’s totally random.”
“You underestimate yourself. Your power. But I’m not surprised. This game has barely begun.”
“Game?” I frowned. But then my gaze moved to the table between us. I hadn’t even noticed what was on it before. It was a chess board with white and black pieces. “Are we playing a game?”
“We seem to be.”
The pieces were already in play, not all lined up at the edges. Bishop was playing the white pieces, and I was playing the black ones. He’d already taken one of my pawns. “But I don’t even know how to play chess.”
“Then you need to learn. And you need to learn fast.”
The next moment, he stood up and swept the board off the table. The pieces went flying in every direction.
I got to my feet, alarmed. “Bishop, what are you—?”
He didn’t let me finish my sentence. He grabbed the front of my dress and pulled me toward him, crushing his mouth against mine.
My thoughts fell away as he kissed me—and I kissed him back. Now this was more like my normal dreams about Bishop. Passionate, reckless, total abandon. Incredible.
No hunger to ruin the moment. No ravenous need to devour his soul.
Just his lips against mine with no consequences. No punishment. Only pleasure.
When our lips finally parted and I opened my eyes, there was a coldness in his gaze that betrayed the scorching heat of the kiss.
Cold as ice. It was the look he normally got just before he—
I gasped as he sliced the dagger into my chest. I scrambled back from him, collapsing to the ground. Grasping for the hilt, I pulled it out with a pained cry. My blood was difficult to see against the red dress, but it flowed, pulsing out with every beat of my heart.
I gasped for breath. “I trusted you.”
“No, you didn’t.” He stared down at me sprawled on the cracked, dry ground. His dark brows were drawn tightly together. “You never did.”
I fell all the way backward, struggling to keep breathing. All I could manage was a small shriek when Cassandra appeared behind Bishop. He didn’t see her.
He didn’t see the golden dagger in her hand.
She slashed it across his throat in one smooth, violent motion. His hands flew to the wound as the blood began to gush. A moment later, he fell to my side.
The roaring vortex of the Hollow opened up—even here. It was the last thing I saw before I died.
And the last thing I felt was Bishop grasping hold of my hand.
* * *
I woke up, gasping for breath. My sheets were soaked with sweat. I felt the strong urge to bolt from my bed and start running as fast as I could somewhere, anywhere. But I forced myself to stay right where I was.
Bishop was an angel of death. One of Heaven’s assassins.
Cassandra hadn’t been lying when she’d told me this. I believed her. This piece of the puzzle fit really well, even if it revealed a terrifying picture.
He’d killed me in my dream tonight.
It was what I feared would happen in reality, no matter how much I tried to deny it, even to myself.
But I was different. Bishop and me—we were connected on a deeper level. Even though I didn’t know anything about his life before he became an angel, or his life as an angel, I had to trust my gut when it came to him. And my heart.
Because I did trust him.
Heart and gut didn’t lie—at least, not at the same time.
They didn’t.
Chapter 8
I might be seventeen years old, but watching my mother leave for the airport in a taxi still made me choke up like a little kid.
“Call me if there are any problems.” She gave me a big hug in the driveway. I clung tight to her before finally letting go. “I’m sure you and Cassandra will be fine here without me, but no parties, okay?”
I just nodded, my throat tight.
I hadn’t said a word to try to stop her. Even though I hated how Cassandra had magically coerced her to leave town, I knew it was for the best. She’d be safer away from here for a week. And she was so excited about the trip, how could I spoil it for her?
There had always been something stopping her from taking this dream vacation. A husband who didn’t like to travel (unless it was permanent, and in the direction of his new girlfriend), a kid who always had anxiety attacks on airplanes (that was me—I hate being trapped in small spaces, especially three miles above the ground), and then a job that barely allowed her any time off.
So I was happy for her. Really.
But standing there, watching the taxi drive away down the street, the realization that I was really alone sank in deep. Even though we didn’t always get along so well, she represented my normal life. And soon she’d be five thousand miles away.
“I need to go,” Cassandra told me after I went back inside, out of the cold, and ate a big breakfast of eggs, toast and Pop-Tarts. She gleefully had some cold Chinese food and more red goo.
She wore clothes she’d borrowed from me this morning. Just because an angel arrived ready to do her mission—whatever that mission really was—didn’t mean she packed a bag. Even though she was a few inches taller than me, and had a bigger chest, my clothes looked good on her. It was annoying how good they looked, really.
“To the church?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“I’ll come with you.” I had to get out of here. I couldn’t keep dwelling on what was wrong with my life—I had to do something to fix it. Also, I needed to see Bishop. I wanted to ask him about what Cassandra told me—him being an angel of death. I wanted to know why he’d never told me this before. Maybe that could help stop nightmares like the one last night.
“No, I think it’s best that you stay here.” She put her dishes in the sink. “Let the professionals handle this problem.”
I blanched. “You think I’d get in the way?”
“I just think it would be safer if you stayed here. Take the day to rest and reflect. I’ll let you know if we learn anything.”
“Rest and reflect?” I repeated, dumbfounded.
“Exactly. Have a lovely day.” Without another word she was gone, out the front door. I watched through the kitchen window as she walked down the driveway and disappeared around the corner.
Rest and reflect? Seriously?
Needless to say, there was very little resting. Lots of reflecting, though, as I thought and overthought everything over the next couple of hours.
Even without being around anyone to trigger my hunger, I still felt it pushing in at the edges, gnawing on my control like a dog with a bone. Taking part of Colin’s soul last night had barely satisfied me for a couple hours.
It scared me—especially with too much time to think and nobody around to distract me.
I flipped through the newspaper only to see another article about two more mysterious deaths in the city. Police were stumped. There was no cause of death that could be determined, no sign of murder or disease. It was as if the victims had just stopped living. The only clue that the deaths were connected was the strange black lines around their mouths.
I forced myself to stop reading the article and flipped to another about three teens who’d committed suicide on Friday night. They didn’t go to my school and I didn’t recognize the names, but it also sent a chill through me.
There was no good news in Trinity to be found today, it would seem. It wasn’t just me who was in trouble in this city. Everybody—even those not touched by the supernatural—was at risk.
Studying was my strong point. It got me good grades. It should be able to help me get the answers I needed to help myself and other people at risk right now. I went on the internet and searched for more information about nexi, the spawn of angels and demons.
I found nothing helpful. At all.
After a full half hour of staring at the screen, a scream of frustration rose in my throat, but I forced it back down and tried to think rationally. Who my birth parents were was something I had no control over. I needed to refocus my energy and attention on what I could control: my goal of finding Stephen and retrieving my soul. I’d deal with what it meant to be a nexus after I did everything I could to fix my immediate problems, lose my hunger and have the chance to be close to Bishop (or anyone else, for that matter) without...difficulties.
I grabbed the landline to call Stephen’s house, which was only two doors down from my own. My cell phone had taken up permanent residence in my nightstand drawer. Grays had a weird supernatural vibe that messed with the signal and made phones like that completely useless to me.
His mother picked up. I shakily asked if she’d heard from him lately and where he might be. She had no information for me—and yet again, she said she was sorry. This wasn’t the first call I’d made to the Keyes residence in the last week. I’m sure his mother thought I was obsessed with her son. I was. But not for the reason she might think.
Discouraged, I hung up after saying a hurried goodbye. I stood in the center of my bedroom, my fists clenched at my sides, feeling utterly helpless and alone.
I hated feeling that I had no control over my life anymore.
Cassandra told me to stay home and let the “professionals” handle this. Well, I’d decided I wholeheartedly disagreed. I would go to the church and get my answers, even if it was just to grill Bishop about his mysterious past.
Just as I’d pulled my coat on and started for the front door, the phone rang. I almost ignored it, but something drove me to pick it up.
I picked up the phone. “Hello?”
“Samantha.”
I froze. He’d only said my name, but I knew the voice. My grip on the receiver tightened. “Stephen?”
“I need to talk to you.”
My words tripped over themselves in a hurry to escape my mouth. “Where’s my soul? Where’s Carly’s soul?”
“I have to see you in person.” There was a short hesitation. “Look, I know you hate me...”
I had to slump down in the nearest chair since my legs gave out. “I just want to be normal again.” The words bubbled up my throat before I could hold them back. I knew very well that it couldn’t ever happen. Even if I wasn’t a gray, being the secret daughter of an angel and a demon had made me abnormal from the day I was born. It didn’t matter that I’d only recently learned the truth.
“Meet me at the Trinity Mall,” he said. “On the fourth floor by the railing. It’s busy there today so you don’t have to worry about me doing anything threatening, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”
I stood up and pressed my back against the wall for support. “Everything about you is threatening, Stephen.”
“Don’t bring one of your new friends.”
“Why wouldn’t I bring all of them? You’re the bad guy here, remember?”
“I’m not as bad as you might think. We’re the same. We should be on the same side.”
My grip tightened on the phone. “I’m on my own side. Nobody else’s.”
“Then you should want all the information you can get about what’s to come. Meet me there in an hour.”
He hung up.
I stared at the phone before I finally placed it back on its base.
I’d been searching for him for a week and had come up with nothing but air. If Stephen didn’t want to be found, then he wouldn’t be found. But now he wanted to talk to me.
On his terms.
My first instinct was to find Bishop, but if Stephen saw him with me I knew he’d leave and I’d never see him again.
I had to get my soul back on my own. Put the lid back on this box and keep it there. Then I’d be able to leave the city again, get past the barrier. Other people’s souls—including Bishop’s—wouldn’t drive me crazy with hunger. Everything would be better.
I could still fix this.
* * *
The Trinity Mall. Not my favorite place in the city.
Over three hundred stores on four levels, it was a shopping mall slash tourist destination. Trinity was huge enough to have a few malls, but this was the crown jewel right in the heart of downtown. I used to love coming here with Carly, shopping for hours on end, and having lunch in the food court downstairs, back when we both had regular-size appetites. We’d still gorge on the food—hamburgers, Chinese food, souvlaki, French fries, you name it. She’d complain about her slow metabolism and grumble about how I never gained a pound. I’d tell her she looked fine—because she always did whether she realized it or not. I should have told her how much I envied her curves.
But then I ran into some trouble here. After my parents’ divorce was finalized six months ago, I went on a bit of a shoplifting spree. Or, as my guidance counselor put it, “a cry for attention.”
It was never much, just enough to give me a rush of excitement that I was getting away with something. That I wasn’t being perfect, or good, or coloring inside the lines like everyone had told me to all my life. Instead of focusing on being a perfect student and getting all As, I got a lipstick. A scarf. A leather wallet. I knew it was wrong even as I shoved them in my pocket or under my shirt. I didn’t try to justify it as something I needed that I couldn’t afford. I could afford it. My father felt enough guilt over the divorce and his move across the ocean that my monthly allowance, written on checks with his gold-stamped law firm logo in the corner, were so big I didn’t even need to apply for part-time jobs. I mean, I couldn’t buy a car or anything major, but for the necessities of life, I could get what I needed.
Getting caught had been mortifying in so many ways. No charges were laid, but my humiliation was witnessed by several kids from school. The cop had been a jerk to me, treating me like a total juvie and a spoiled brat. I’d sat in the back of a cop car for an hour, and only through sheer will had I avoided having the anxiety attack I always got in enclosed spaces. I’d closed my eyes and breathed in and out, pretending to be somewhere, anywhere else.
My penance for my short life of crime was to do some community service. I worked in the kitchen at a local mission and had the chance to interact with people who really had it bad while I had never appreciated how good I had it. I had a home, a roof over my head and a mother who loved me. I’d met homeless people who had nothing and nobody.
It was the most important lesson of my life. Be grateful for what you have, since it can be taken away at any time. Sometimes fate steps in to pull the rug from beneath your feet whether you’re prepared or not—and we all fall differently.
I now regretted my month of shoplifting, and not just because I’d been caught. I knew it was wrong and I’d done it for stupid reasons. Not that there was ever a good reason to steal.
But I still hated this mall. I usually shopped at the one on the north side of the city. Took longer to get there, but at least the floors weren’t tiled with my shame.
Past Macy’s and a lineup of other stores that at one time would have been calling my name were the escalators up to the fourth floor. I wasn’t a fan of the elevators due to my claustrophobia. I didn’t even like wearing turtlenecks.
At the moment, I didn’t need any more anxiety than I already had.
The railing curved in a circle around the open center of the fourth floor and looked down into the main floor food court a hundred feet below. A massive chandelier of crystal birds hung from the glass ceiling, a piece by some artist that had cost a ton of money when the mall opened twenty years ago. When the sun from the skylights hit it just right—it was magic.
I gripped the railing and gazed down nervously at the food court. Despite my big breakfast, my stomach grumbled. Sundays were a busy day at the mall. There were thousands of people here, and I swear I sensed the press, the heat and the scent of every one of their souls.
I couldn’t stay here for very long. Already, I felt the need to escape.
“You’re here.”
Stephen’s voice bit through my concentration and I tensed, turning slowly to see him leaning against the railing six feet to my left.
This was real. He was here. I’d finally found him.
Or, rather, he’d found me.
Stay calm.
But that was a losing proposition. I couldn’t be calm around Stephen Keyes.
A very short time ago I thought he was the hottest guy I’d ever seen, in Trinity or anywhere else. Black hair, cinnamon-colored eyes with a slight exotic slant to them thanks to his Hawaiian-born mother.
Stephen only dated the most beautiful girls. I never expected to be one of them. I preferred to admire him from afar and keep my heart safe from being trampled on. But...then he kissed me. And he’d hurt more than just my heart.
For a fleeting moment, I’d honestly thought the boy I’d always had a crush on had been into me. Instead, he’d been on assignment for my aunt to remove my soul and free my nexus abilities so they could be used for her gain.
I had no interest in someone like Stephen who would lie to me, use me and steal something so valuable from me. And I never would again. While Bishop had sworn to help me, and I did believe he meant it despite my many doubts and questions about him, the only person I completely trusted was the one I saw in the mirror.
My grip on the railing tightened painfully as a group of teens moved past, way too close, the scent of their souls brushing into my orbit of hunger.
“So here we are,” Stephen said.
“That’s close enough,” I said when he got four feet away.
He stopped. “I’m not planning to hurt you. I’m not the one who carries around a sharp golden dagger, remember?”
“No, you’re the one who helped my aunt nearly kill me.”
“I don’t think she would have killed you.” There were dark shadows under his eyes, which made it look as if he hadn’t slept in days. I’d noticed the same circles under my eyes this morning, thanks to my nightmare-induced tossing and turning. “Besides, she’s gone.”
A stomach-churning image of the Hollow grabbing hold of my aunt after Carly had stabbed her with Bishop’s dagger flashed through my mind. “Are you upset about that?”
He gave me a grim look. “No.”
I didn’t want to take my attention off him in case he disappeared in a puff of smoke. This is what I’d wanted. I’d searched the city for him for a week and now he was standing right in front of me. “I don’t want to talk about my aunt, Stephen. I’m here for one reason and one reason only.”
“Your soul.”
“And Carly’s. Give them back to me.”
He looked down at the food court, his jaw tight. “Look at all of them. It’s hard to believe they have no idea what’s happening in Trinity right now. Right in front of their eyes. Humans.” He said it with barely contained disgust.
He was trying to change the subject. I had to stay calm and not make any huge demands. He had all the power here, but I didn’t want him to know that. “You’re human.”
“I was.”
“Now you think you’re more than that?”
He didn’t answer my question. His gaze flicked to me. “You were already more than human before this.”
I tried not to grimace. He knew I was a nexus, thanks to Natalie. My little secret that nobody was supposed to know. “Other than the hunger, I don’t feel any different than before.”
Stephen studied my face, as if searching for some clue there. “You will.”
I still gripped the railing as if it was the only thing keeping me from tumbling over. “No, I won’t.”
He shook his head. “Things are changing...ever since Natalie’s been gone.”
“Is this another recruitment speech or a warning?”
He snorted a little, and I could have sworn he looked a bit nauseous.
I frowned. “Are you all right?”
That earned me another dry laugh. “Do you really care about my well-being, Samantha?”
My hands were sweating as I forced myself to stay calm and not start shrieking demands. “You wanted to talk to me. So talk. What’s changing?”
He kept his eyes forward, not looking directly at me. “It wasn’t like this when Natalie was still around.”
“What?”
“It starts with the cold. Like...worse than normal. Worse than the cold we feel from not having a soul. And the hunger...” His expression tightened. “You can’t ignore it even if you try. It’s there...a constant need that doesn’t leave for a second, driving you to feed from someone...anyone. And it doesn’t get satisfied when you give in to it...it—it just gets worse.”
I think I stopped breathing. This wasn’t what I’d expected him to say—not at all. “What are you talking about?”
He swallowed, and when his gaze met mine I swear I saw fear there. “Stasis.”
I shook my head. “What’s stasis?”
When he wrenched his gaze from the food court to look at me again, there was something in his eyes that scared me. Something bleak and defeated.
Stephen was afraid.
This realization chilled me right down to my bones.
“Feeding—kissing someone—it makes you feel better for a little while. But...it doesn’t stop what’s going to happen. We’re changing, Samantha. You will, too. We lose our minds, our control. Everything.”
I started to tremble. He was talking about the zombie grays. “But—but that’s what happens to the grays that feed too much. Natalie warned us to control ourselves or we’ll end up like that. But if we don’t feed, it won’t happen. Right?”
“It’s different now. She didn’t know. We go into that state and...then we come back out again. That mindlessness, it’s only the beginning.” He didn’t say it like it was a good thing.
I stared at him, trying to understand, but then with a sickening feeling it all clicked into place for me. “Oh, God. The gray from last night...”
“What?”
“He was different.” My words were barely audible. I tensed up as more people closely brushed past us. “He—he was stronger, more powerful, and...and evil. Like, he had no...” I gritted my teeth before I managed to continue. “Like he had no soul.”
Stephen didn’t mock me and tell me this was a stupid thing to say—that of course a gray had no soul. Instead, his expression only grew more grave. “That’s right. Any morals, any compassion we have left—after stasis, it’s gone. Stripped. Soulless, completely and totally.”
I took this in and worked the disturbing information over in my head. “I thought you were already like that.”
He let out a humorless snort. “I’ve changed from how I was before, but not completely. Not like what I’ve seen in the past few days.”
I clasped my hands tightly to keep them from shaking. “So this guy—he was one of the zombies, and then he...then he came back from that?”
He nodded.
I couldn’t speak for a full minute, just staring at him. “Why are you telling me this? Why did you want to meet me here?”
He looked at me steadily. “Because it’s my fault you’re like this. I wanted to warn you.”
There was a big part of Stephen that had been changed forever by becoming a gray, one that could be manipulated by Natalie to do bad things on her behalf—but he wasn’t completely changed yet. There was still some part of him that remained the same Stephen that I’d had a crush on.
He was afraid of what was to come. For himself...and for me.
I fought to find the words to speak. “How long before it happens?”
He didn’t speak for a moment. “All I know is—it’s coming, Samantha. And I don’t know how it’ll go for me.”
My stomach clenched. “What do you mean?”
“Stasis either evolves you into something dark, something evil—worse than anything I ever could have imagined.” He hesitated. “Or...it kills you.”
Chapter 9
Stephen didn’t start laughing and tell me he was just messing with me. He was totally serious. This horrible situation didn’t have a happy ending, a slow fading of the hunger like my aunt had suggested, and a return to normal life.
It had a death sentence.
I grabbed hold of his sleeve as my numbness over his deadly proclamation faded and panic set in like somebody lighting up a firecracker inside me. “You need to give me back my soul...and Carly’s, too. Please, Stephen, before it’s too late.”
His expression turned stony. “You mean before I change. Or die.”
I dug my fingers into his arm as he began to pull away from me. “Stephen—”
“Oh. My. God. You have got to be kidding me right now, right?”
My stomach sank at the sound of the familiar voice behind me. I didn’t have to turn around. I knew who it was.
If I had a nemesis, Jordan Fitzpatrick was it. She was a drop-dead gorgeous redhead, and an aspiring model. We went to the same school.
She hated me. And the feeling was completely mutual. I didn’t like coming face-to-face with her in public places since she never held back on her opinion, especially when it came to me. Sometimes I could take it and throw it right back at her. But other times words could hurt me, even if they weren’t sticks and stones.
Did I mention that Stephen was her ex, and he’d broken her heart?
While still reeling from the horrific news Stephen had shared with me, I turned slowly to see Jordan standing there with her best friend and trusty blond sidekick, Julie Travis. Julie was another one who wasn’t thrilled by my continuing existence—and vice versa. Julie was the reason that Colin and Carly had broken up over the summer. She’d slept with him while he’d been drunk at a party.
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Michelle Rowen
Тип: электронная книга
Жанр: Детская проза
Язык: на английском языке
Издательство: HarperCollins
Дата публикации: 16.04.2024
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О книге: MY KISS CAN KILL.I used to be ordinary Samantha Day, but that’s changed. Now, after one dark kiss from a dangerous boy, I can steal someone’s soul…or their life. If I give in to the constant hunger inside me, I hurt anyone I kiss. If I don’t…I hurt myself. Bishop is the one whose kiss I crave most, but if I kiss him, I’ll kill him. Then there’s another boy, one I can’t hurt. One whose kiss seems to miraculously quell my hunger.They’re both part of a team of angels and demons that’s joined forces in my city to fight a mysterious rising darkness, an evil that threatens everyone I know and love. I just wonder if I’ll be able to help Bishop–or if I’m just another part of the darkness he’s sworn to destroy….NIGHTWATCHERS BOOK 2 ‘Gorgeous angels, suspense & romance…’ -Richelle Mead on Dark Kiss