The Nurse And The Single Dad
Dianne Drake
Changed by a single kiss…Single dad Daniel Caldwell is completely focused on caring for his daughter Maddie and has no time for love. Until he meets Zoey Evans, the hospice nurse with the sparkling blue eyes…Zoey has vowed never to trust another man, but Daniel is different. Kind, caring and drop-dead gorgeous…he’s the first man who has tempted her to change her mind. And when one passionate kiss proves life changing Daniel and Zoey will have to re-evaluate everything they ever thought about love!
Changed by a single kiss...
Single dad Daniel Caldwell is completely focused on caring for his daughter, Maddie, and has no time for love. Until he meets Zoey Evans, a hospice nurse with sparkling blue eyes...
Zoey has vowed never to trust another man, but Daniel is different. Kind, caring and drop-dead gorgeous, he’s the first man who has tempted her to change her mind. And when one passionate kiss proves life changing, Daniel and Zoey will have to reevaluate everything they ever thought about love!
It was a soul-shattering kiss.
One that reached him in places he’d thought were unreachable. A gentle touching of the lips turning quickly into the light probing of their tongues. Hands grabbing hold, clinging. Breaths mingling as one. Dear God, it was the kiss that he’d feared so much, yet wanted so desperately.
Surprisingly, Zoey didn’t press to end the kiss, as he’d expected she would do. Rather, she reached up, winding her hands around his neck, and fit her body into the contours of his. And such a nice fit it was. So familiar, and yet so new.
“Daniel,” she whispered, pulling back slightly. “We shouldn’t be doing this.”
Dear Reader (#ulink_e3cc1f2b-cde3-5caf-9545-aed1225dfb8d),
My aunt met the love of her life when she was twenty. They had a whirlwind courtship and she married him within two months of their meeting. Sadly, he died before their first anniversary and her world turned upside down.
Her first vow was never to marry again. She’d had the love of her life and no one would ever compare. Her second was to move somewhere far away from the memories. She did move, and she never dated. Then one day she met a man on the train. He sat next to her...they talked. She refused him the first fifteen times he asked her out, but on the sixteenth she accepted, determined to show him such a bad time that he’d leave her alone. But guess what? She accepted his next invitation and many after that.
‘I didn’t want such a drastic change in my life,’ she told me. Change is what she finally gave in to, though, and she was rewarded with a blissful fifty-year marriage.
Change in your life’s direction is difficult. In The Nurse and the Single Dad Daniel Caldwell is forced to deal with a change that moves him in a new direction. Both my aunt, in real life, and Daniel Caldwell, in my book, have discovered that making tough changes can result in something amazing. May all your changes bring you something amazing!
Wishing you health and happiness...
Dianne
Visit me on my website at dianne-drake.com (http://www.dianne-drake.com) or on Facebook at Facebook.com/DianneDrakeAuthor (http://www.Facebook.com/DianneDrakeAuthor).
The Nurse and the Single Dad
Dianne Drake
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
Starting in non-fiction, DIANNE DRAKE penned hundreds of articles and seven books under the name JJ Despain. In 2001 she began her romance-writing career with The Doctor Dilemma, published by Harlequin Duets. In 2005 Dianne’s first Medical Romance, Nurse in Recovery, was published, and with more than 20 novels to her credit she has enjoyed writing for Mills & Boon ever since.
Books by Dianne Drake
Mills & Boon Medical Romance
Deep South Docs
A Home for the Hot-Shot Doc
A Doctor’s Confession
P.S. You’re a Daddy!
A Child to Heal Their Hearts
Tortured by Her Touch
Doctor, Mummy...Wife?
Visit the Author Profile page
at millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk) for more titles.
For my aunt, Lorraine White,
who faced her changes with courage.
Praise for Dianne Drake (#ulink_1c6d6c61-4fc6-54c0-99c6-f572ce5d8540)
‘A very emotional, heart-tugging story. A beautifully written book. This story brought tears to my eyes in several parts.’
—Goodreads on P.S. You’re a Daddy!
Contents
Cover (#ub966ab3b-cf28-59c6-9bdc-5fa599397354)
Back Cover Text (#u1a220f09-6aa2-53b2-8e45-ee37d11afaf9)
Introduction (#u45edb3c4-0169-5fdb-b092-912098448b8b)
Dear Reader (#ulink_82b1f44e-80fa-5c18-b1ad-0944432058c5)
Title Page (#u8e437cfa-979c-5a23-a920-23a156506d8d)
About the Author (#u6436d7ba-aa40-5034-b4bb-bfca0af2b390)
Dedication (#uf324b94f-f6a1-51f6-ad8c-dd5dde6e7806)
Praise (#ulink_85b8a1fb-e2bd-5c2d-98fe-4890e0eb8224)
CHAPTER ONE (#ulink_1fe5135e-69f4-51a7-a1d6-0547e84fcc48)
CHAPTER TWO (#ulink_87b0995f-5ad5-59f0-8f1a-9353e5f0e6ea)
CHAPTER THREE (#ulink_a7e42d7b-8c60-57a3-9450-af0541160f81)
CHAPTER FOUR (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER FIVE (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER SIX (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER SEVEN (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER EIGHT (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER NINE (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER TEN (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER ELEVEN (#litres_trial_promo)
EPILOGUE (#litres_trial_promo)
Extract (#litres_trial_promo)
Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER ONE (#ulink_7619a44c-43d4-54c6-9875-03341ec4fcdf)
COFFEE. BLACK AND HOT and lots of it—his every-morning indulgence. It was one of the few things in life he could count on with any regularity. Something he looked forward to.
Daniel Caldwell took a sip of his coffee, sat the thick paper cup back on the round tabletop and then spread the latest edition of the local Seattle newspaper out in front of him. An article outlining the latest in fluctuating oil prices caught his attention so he settled into his straight-backed chair to read it. One article was about all he ever had time for, given that he only allowed himself half an hour of “me” time on his way to work every morning. The rest of his day was filled with hospital duties or the duties of being a single father to an active, growing three-year-old daughter who was always ready to grab his attention.
It was a busy life, a very hectic life sometimes, but this daily half hour at the coffee shop made him feel more human. He liked mixing and mingling with other people for that little while, even though he really didn’t have the time, at this point in his life, to socialize. It was nice being around others who had no expectations of him. In his own personal scheme of things, that was a rarity.
Daniel took another sip of coffee and read that the oil experts expected a continued fluctuation in oil prices well into the foreseeable future. Not that it mattered much to him. He drove an economical little car that couple of miles to work every day and, like that grandmother-type driver who typically took the car out only to go to the grocery store, he didn’t do much other driving. At least not during the week. On his days off, though, he tried to take Maddie to the park or down to the pier. She liked to throw bits of bread to the seagulls and watch the people fish off the docks.
Daniel glanced at his watch, regretting that his half hour was passing so quickly, but fifteen minutes of it were now over with. So he took another gulp of coffee and casually glanced at the shop’s door as the bells mounted above it tinkled a merry welcome to the woman pushing the door open and entering.
She was attractive. More than attractive, she was a beauty. Elegant and understated in a pair of navy-blue scrubs. Had he seen her at the hospital before?
Looking away as quickly as he’d glanced at the door, Daniel didn’t want to get caught gawking as she made her way through the tiny tables for two and headed straight to the serving counter. But once her back was to him he looked at her again. Did he know her? She seemed familiar. Same curvy frame, same confident carriage. No, it couldn’t be. On second thought, maybe... But her hair was lighter—a nice honey-blond now, which suited her fair complexion—and it wasn’t pulled back into a tight little bun at the nape of her neck, but rather it was flowing freely to her shoulders, giving her an oddly feminine look. It was nice. Oh, and the glasses were missing. Zoey always wore oversized black-framed glasses that gobbled up most of the top half of her face. They weren’t becoming on her, nor were they unbecoming. Rather, they’d been a matter-of-fact statement that she simply liked to conceal her beautiful face beneath plastic.
Zoey. One thing was for sure. He’d never expected to run into her. Never wanted to, actually. So should he approach her? Be polite and ask her how she was doing? Daniel thought about it for a moment as he watched her interact with the barista, a young man of about twenty who was sporting waist-length dreadlocks and a killer smile. He noticed that she tilted her head slightly to the right as she laughed at something the barista was saying. She was so upbeat. But then, Zoey had always been upbeat during her several weeks with Elizabeth, and that was one of the things he’d admired about her.
That, and her nursing skills. Exemplary nursing skills, in his opinion. Especially since she was doing a very tough job—one he personally wouldn’t want to do himself. He remembered how she was always so optimistic about her work.
Daniel knew that Zoey’s outlook had been a great comfort to Elizabeth during her final days, and for that he’d be eternally grateful. She’d made Elizabeth smile and laugh.
This woman at the serving counter now had the same melodic laugh he remembered. A laugh he’d come to count on during some very rough times. He could hear it ring out over the low drone of the background chattering in the shop, and it was still as infectious as ever. Made him smile just hearing it.
It caught Daniel off-guard when Zoey spun around to face him, coffee in hand. She turned back to the counter for a moment to tuck a tip into the jar sitting next to the cash register, then looked straight at Daniel—who glanced immediately back down at his newspaper, realizing that in the past several minutes he’d managed to read only one sentence.
He purposely kept his eyes down as she started walking in his direction, not sure how, or if he wanted, to greet her. Damn, she was a reminder of bad, bad times. Times he wanted to forget but couldn’t, as they still haunted him a year later. Even so, as she brushed by his table, he forced himself to look up and smile. Her smile was returned through a pair of the most hauntingly stunning blue eyes he’d ever seen. Damn it to hell, he didn’t know what to do now.
“Daniel?” she said, pausing briefly, her lips curling into a friendly smile.
“Zoey?” he returned. “Zoey Evans?”
She nodded. “It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”
“A year.” One long, lonely year since Elizabeth’s death.
“So, how are you doing?” she asked.
“Pretty well. Working and taking care of Maddie... That’s about all I have time for.”
“I’ll bet being a single father isn’t easy. I’m assuming that you’re still single?”
“Still single,” he said, pointing to the chair across from him as he rose to his feet. “Care to join me for a few minutes?” He glanced at his watch. “I have about seven before I have to head out to the hospital.”
She frowned for a moment, then gradually nodded her head. “That’s about all I have, too. I have a patient to see near here this morning, and I don’t want to be late for my appointment.”
He thought back to all the appointments she’d had with Elizabeth and she’d never been late. Not even by a minute or two. “You always were punctual,” he said as he pulled the chair out for her then watched the graceful way she slid down into it.
“And you were always running behind.”
“Not anymore. I’ve changed my evil ways.”
Zoey smiled at him and sat her espresso down on the table. “Always being late bothered Elizabeth, you know. She said she could set the clock by your tardiness.”
He hadn’t talked about Elizabeth in so long... Not out loud, anyway. Although, she was always in his thoughts. But actually to talk about her to someone... The wound she left still cut deep and he was always afraid that it would open and bleed again. He’d gotten along without her this past year and it hadn’t been easy, never easy, because he missed her so much that there were still remnants of a physical pain lingering. There hadn’t been a day gone by that he didn’t look at her picture, talk to her, reminisce...
But actually to talk aloud about her... Never. Not even to Abby, Elizabeth’s mother. She watched Maddie while he was at work and there had arisen this unspoken rule between them that Elizabeth’s name was not to be uttered out loud.
“I knew she hated being late, hated me being late. She used to fuss at me for it. I think it was one of the few things we ever really fought about. But I don’t do that anymore, and I’ve got to tell you that being on time is difficult when you don’t have someone behind you to push you into it.”
Zoey took a sip of her espresso and looked over the top of her cup at him. “She was happy in her marriage. She talked about that a lot.”
“So was I. Five years wasn’t long enough.” Future plans they’d made had been cut short by a voracious leukemia. It was the kind of thing no one ever planned for, let alone considered within the realm of possibilities. But Elizabeth had been diagnosed and three months later...
“They were five good years, though, and just think! You have Maddie. How is she, by the way?”
“She’s resilient. Staying with Elizabeth’s mom while I’m working. Being quite the handful most of the time. Lots of opinion. Lots of attitude.”
“She’s about three now, isn’t she? The last time I saw her she was barely more than a baby, and I probably wouldn’t even recognize her now. They do grow up fast, don’t they?”
He gulped down the last of his coffee. “That’s what I’m afraid of,” he said as he folded his newspaper with the intention of taking it back to work with him. He did that every morning, although he never read it, and usually tossed it away as soon as he was in his office. “Grammy overindulges her, though, and I’m afraid that’s contributing to some of her thinking. She throws tantrums and threatens to go live with her grandma if I don’t do what she wants.”
“Tantrums?” Zoey asked. “Why?”
Daniel grimaced. “It’s difficult for her, going back and forth between her grandmother and me. She’s so young, and her life is so...unsettled. I’m not sure she knows what to count on.” He blew out a frustrated breath. “I mean, the poor child can’t even count on seeing me every night because I can’t count on getting home every night. It’s like so much of life is up in the air and there’s nothing I can do to change that. Not for either of us.”
“Then be patient with her,” Zoey said. “She sounds very confused, and I’m sorry to hear that because, from what I remember of Maddie, she was a very sweet child.”
“I know she’s confused. So I’m crossing my fingers and hoping she’ll get through the tantrum stage without it leaving any permanent scars.”
“We all express ourselves in different ways, Daniel. I expect that Maddie’s expressing her confusion the only way she knows how. And I doubt that it will leave scars. Even at three, Maddie’s on her own journey, and this is simply part of it.”
“I know that, and I do understand what she’s going through, but that doesn’t make it any easier on me. And the way Abby spoils her...” He shook his head. “It gets in the way; I think Maddie believes that everyone should treat her the way her grandmother does.”
Zoey smiled. “Aren’t grandmothers supposed to spoil their grandchildren? I always thought that was a God-given right.”
“But Abby goes to the extreme.”
“Or you’re just being overly sensitive to the only way she knows how to express her love. We all do it differently, you know.”
“Maybe that’s the case, because I know she means well. And she loves Maddie. In fact, when it gets right down to it, she’s a wonderful grandmother. But Elizabeth and I talked for hours one night about our hopes and dreams for our daughter, and the way I would raise her once Elizabeth was gone, and it wasn’t by spoiling her the way Abby does. Elizabeth desperately wanted Maddie to grow up strong and independent.”
“I know you’ll take care of Maddie, but I want you to take care of yourself, too. Go on with your life, Daniel. Have fun. Be happy. Find someone to start over with. I don’t want you to be alone.”
Yes, they’d made plans together, but Elizabeth’s plan for him was so difficult.
“Well, I’m sure things will work out in your favor, given enough time. Oh, and maturity on Maddie’s part. I’m confident she will eventually grow out of it.”
Daniel sighed heavily. He knew Abby was trying to replace Elizabeth with Maddie, which was why he hadn’t said anything to her, as Abby’s loss was truly as great as his own. “I’d originally thought about putting Maddie in daycare at the hospital. But I’m a firm believer in family first, and I think Maddie can benefit from her grandmother, if her grandmother eases up a little.”
“Then talk to her, Daniel. Be honest and don’t hold back anything. That’s the only fair thing to do for everybody involved. I mean, I met Abby a few times. She’s a strong lady. Very opinionated. And she dearly loves her granddaughter, which is why I know she’ll listen to you.”
“I hope so, because I think it’s good for both of them to be together, especially now, when the wounds are still so close to the surface.”
“Like I said—have that talk. It will do you both some good.”
“I will. And thanks for the advice. I haven’t had anyone to talk to in a while and this has been...pleasant.” He smiled, and pushed back from the table. “Look, I’ve got to go. I have three residents and five med students waiting to do rounds with me this morning, then I’ve got a meeting at nine and at least a dozen patients to see, not to mention reading charts, revising orders, et cetera, et cetera...”
“I take it you’re still a hospitalist?”
“Still and always. Private practice isn’t my thing. It’s too confining. I like the variety you get working general duty in a hospital. It keeps you on your toes, and you never get bored.”
“Then private practice bores you?”
“Can’t say one way or another, since I’ve never been in one. But I can’t imagine myself contained for very long in one office. The case work may vary patient by patient but I think that overall it would be too restrictive for me. No, I like the open spaces of the hospital, where I’m free to wander at will.”
“At will?”
“OK. Maybe not at will so much as what the caseload dictates.” He chuckled. “And it dictates pretty loudly sometimes. So, do you get over to the hospital very often?”
“Not really. Even though I work for the hospital, I’m based out of an office across the street, and I only go over there maybe twice a week. And then it’s in and out as quickly as I can. Hospitals aren’t my strong suit.”
“Why not?”
“Well, you like the big, open spaces of them, while I prefer to practice my nursing in a more intimate setting.”
“Which is why you’re in home care.”
“I love home care. Home is where my patients are the happiest.”
“But hospice nursing? That’s tough.”
“And rewarding. I started doing it when I was working on my graduate degree because the hours worked with my school schedule, discovered I loved it, and I’ve never found a reason to change to any other kind of nursing specialty.”
“Like I say, tough work. Losing a patient is never easy but to lose every single one of them?”
She shrugged. “What can I say? I like giving support and care at the end. It’s important work and most people aren’t cut out to do it. I happen to be one of those who is.”
“So, we’re both happy where we are.”
“That’s a good thing, isn’t it?”
He nodded. “We ought to do coffee again sometime. It was...nice.”
“I would, but I don’t wander into this neighborhood at this time of day unless the circumstances call for it. Mrs. Barrow, the lady I’ll be seeing this morning, is an everyday after-lunch call, but I had to move her up today due to a doctor’s appointment this afternoon. And this little coffee shop was right on the way to her house. Except for today, I usually stop here around noon or one.”
“So we miss each other by roughly six hours on a normal day.”
“Apparently we do.”
“Well, maybe I’ll pop in at noon sometime.”
“And maybe I’ll be here.”
Daniel stepped away from the table. “I’ve really got to be going now, so thanks for the company. It was nice bumping into you again.”
“Thank you.”
They parted company and Daniel didn’t look back at the beauty who remained sitting at the table sipping her espresso. At least, not until he was outside. Then he looked back in through the plate-glass window and watched her for a moment. In all the weeks she’d come to his house to care for Elizabeth, he couldn’t remember ever having had a real conversation with her about anything other than Elizabeth.
Turned out Zoey Evans was nice to chat with. And so easy. He was surprised by the ease he’d felt in talking to her. In fact, he wouldn’t mind bumping into her again. It would have to be another coincidence, though, as he wasn’t at a place in his life where he could go out of the way to expand his relationship horizons. Right now, everything was too complicated. But the prospect of seeing Zoey again, well, that almost excited him. It made him feel guilty, too, because it felt like his excitement to see Zoey was betraying Elizabeth. And he didn’t want to feel that way when he was trying hard to push himself forward in his life.
* * *
Daniel Caldwell. It had been a year since she’d last seen him and what a difference that year had made. He’d been so gaunt back then, taking care of his wife and child, as well as maintaining his position at the hospital. Burning his candle at more ends than a candle had to burn. The stress of that time had certainly taken its toll on Daniel and, if it hadn’t shown in the thinness of his face, it did show in the haunting, distant look she always saw in his eyes. It was a difficult time for him and she understood the toll it had taken. She’d seen it before in the families of other patients.
Yet, Daniel was different than most. He internalized his tragedy more than many people did. At least, the ones she’d come into contact with. And he’d always made sure that everyone around him was taken care of first, before his own needs were met. Even her. Zoey recalled how he’d always put on a fresh pot of coffee for her, something that had been totally unnecessary, but welcomed. She’d told him she could make her own coffee, but he wouldn’t hear of that, insisting that every little effort helped the cause, which in Daniel’s case had been his wife.
He’d been right about that, as the more Elizabeth had progressed into her illness the more help she’d needed, which meant the less time Zoey had had to attend to the little things. Back then, she’d truly appreciated the kindness in a simple cup of coffee.
More than that, she’d appreciated Daniel’s devotion to Elizabeth. A lot of people turned away in the last moments, trying to avoid the inevitable. Oh, they might be there in the flesh, but the rest of them would tune out. Not Daniel, though. He’d stayed right in there until the end, doing whatever he could do to help his wife, and also to help her.
Zoey admired that, wishing that she could have seen what appeared to her as the ideal marriage at a different point in time. It was hard for her to imagine someone being that happy in a relationship. She’d never been, and somewhere along the line she’d quit holding out the hope that it could ever happen for her. Her own failure at marriage had really knocked her off her game. Caused her to lack confidence in herself when it came to maintaining other relationships. Truth was, she wasn’t sure she could do that again. At least, not with the same enthusiasm she’d had for her first marriage, tragedy that it was.
Zoey didn’t exclude herself from the possibility of having something more in her future, though. Not entirely. She did have a little hope left, a dying ember. But she wondered if she could approach it with the passion she knew would be needed, as the passion had been dead in her for such a long time now. Brad had seen to that.
Maybe someday she’d settle down and try it again, since life alone wasn’t that great. But not until she found all the pieces of herself that were still missing—the pieces Brad had stolen from her when their marriage had broken up. The basic hope that he’d robbed her of. The disillusionment he’d left in its place. He’d chipped away and chipped away until so much was gone. And she’d let it happen because she’d thought that was part of being in true love, naive as that might have seemed.
Yet, true love had failed her. And quickly. She’d recognized Brad for who he really was early on, and the rest of their few months together had turned into a futile effort of honing her coping skills, trying to figure out where she’d gone so wrong, falling for someone like him. How could she have been so stupid?
Admittedly, he’d hurt her. Not in her heart so much as in her confidence in herself to make wise relationship choices. He’d caused her to lose her bearings in all the things she’d always believed, always wanted. Even now, while she was sure of herself on the outside, everything inside her still quivered with doubts. The result of that was a lack of trust in herself to venture out again. She hadn’t dated, hadn’t wanted to. Hadn’t even thought much about it. Turning her back on the whole muddy affair was easier and, until she was sure she wouldn’t mess up again, she was perfectly happy right where she was.
Sighing, Zoey thought about what her future might hold. A real relationship? One that she trusted? Suddenly, Daniel flashed into her mind and she fantasized about how it would be nice to come home to someone like him. Someone who nurtured. Someone who was passionate about his love. It was such an illusion, though. Daniel was one in a million. She’d heard the affectionate way he’d spoken to his wife, seen the way he’d taken care of her. How he’d sat at her bedside for hours on end, simply holding her hand while she slept. How tenderly he’d kissed her when her pain had been so excruciating she’d been nearly out of her head. How lovingly he’d embraced her in her final moments.
Yes, she’d been granted such an inspiring look into an intimacy she’d never before seen the likes of, and that was when she knew that there weren’t many men like Daniel out there. Elizabeth had been a very lucky woman to have him and, in a way, Zoey envied her for that because a man like Daniel was all she’d ever wanted for herself.
Would she ever find that man? Find someone who cared so deeply and passionately that nothing else in the world seemed to matter? Find someone to love her the way Daniel had loved Elizabeth?
Daniel... Zoey’s mind wandered back to him once again as she drove to her first appointment. He looked good with those few extra pounds he’d put on. And his eyes weren’t so haunted now. It meant he was moving on, and that was commendable, considering what he’d gone through. Some people got stuck at the mourning stage and couldn’t get out. But he had his daughter to care for, and he also had his work at the hospital. Those were good for him. They gave him a great focus.
It had been nice bumping into Daniel today. As a rule she never kept up with the families of her patients once her term of service had ended. Some of them wanted to cling to her as a means of avoidance, but she’d found that a clean break was better for everyone concerned. So chance meetings like the one she’d had with Daniel were rare, and ever rarer was sitting down and talking to them. In fact, Daniel was her first, and she didn’t know what had compelled her to sit down with him.
Maybe because, in theory, he was a colleague? They were, after all, employed by the same hospital even though they were totally isolated from one another. In the past year, when she’d had occasion to go the hospital, she’d glanced around, wondering if she’d see him. Their paths had never crossed, however, and it had never occurred to her to look him up. Because she always kept it professional, as there had to be divisions between personal and professional.
Not that she had a personal life going on right now. Go home, study case notes, feed Fluffy, her Persian diva cat, make a few phone calls, eat a late supper, do some reading and drift off to sleep. Repeat the next day. Then there were the weekends—errands galore. Grocery shopping, laundry, at least a half-day in the office putting charts onto the computer while no one was around to bother her. Plus all the other stuff she did on a daily basis. Oh, and wall-climbing on most Saturdays. She did enjoy that!
Occasionally, if she was bored, she’d treat herself to a movie with all the trimmings—diet soda and buttered popcorn. In the dark, no one cared that she was there all by herself, and it was nice to bask in that anonymity for a couple of hours. No expectations, no worries.
But every Sunday morning she made that obligatory call to her mother.
“How are you doing, dear?” her mother would say.
“I’m fine, Mom.”
“Anything happening in your life yet?”
“Same ol’, same ol’.”
“No new boyfriend, no dating?”
“Just keeping to myself, Mom. And working.”
“So when are you going to find yourself a nice man, settle down and give me some grandbabies?”
“Not in the near future, as far as I can tell. I don’t meet eligible men in my line of work.”
“So go work at the hospital where you can snatch up some handsome young doctor.”
“I don’t want to work in the hospital and I don’t need a handsome young doctor in my life.”
“You never change, Zoey,” her mother would always accuse her. “You never change.”
Same conversation every Sunday morning, and that was what never changed. But that phone call to dear old Mumsy was a habit she couldn’t bring herself to break. So she endured it along with the rest of her obligatory chores. Then twice a year, she trekked home to Omaha for a week, to have that conversation in person. She’d gotten used to enduring the recurring topic in exchange for the week of pampering her mother lavished on her. That part was nice—being taken care of rather than being the caregiver.
As Zoey pulled her little red car into her patient’s driveway, she looked up at the white frame house sitting atop a slight knoll and sighed. It would have been nice spending a little while longer with Daniel this morning. But duty called. For both of them. And her duty right now was to make sure Mrs. Barrow was up to a trip to her doctor this afternoon. Bathed, hair washed, dressed, vital signs stable, medicines administered... It was a privilege tending to someone who needed so much help, but Mrs. Barrow was one of the rare ones who was spunky in her end stages. Zoey liked that. Liked the feisty attitude as it made her feel a little feisty herself.
She sighed again as she headed to the front door, medical bag in hand. Something about Daniel had caused a restlessness in her. She didn’t know why and wasn’t keen to explore the reasons, but she wanted a date. Yes, a date. One night only. Wine and dine. No strings. It would break up her routine and prove to her that there was still a little human need left in her after all.
But with Daniel? She wasn’t sure about that. He was a reminder, though, that something was missing.
CHAPTER TWO (#ulink_ddbbb0e4-0738-595f-b0b4-eed6c144359f)
THE INSTRUCTIONS ON his invitation were perfectly clear. He was to be seated at table seventeen, the table all the way to the far right of the immense banquet hall, halfway from the front and halfway from the back. Two years ago, when he’d attended the hospital fundraiser with Elizabeth, they’d been seated near the front, directly in the center of everything, at a table with three other couples and a clear view of the podium. From prominent to insignificant, he thought, as he started looking for his table.
Daniel was never particularly keen to go to these kinds of affairs, especially ones that required a tuxedo. But Elizabeth had loved getting all dressed up and attending, so he’d been dragged along compliantly for her sake. He thought back to the lovely floor-length strapless blue satin gown she’d worn at their last hospital banquet together. It was stunning on her. His wife had been a head-turner, a real looker, with her long, flowing, sunny blond hair and inviting smile. Someone everyone had noticed, and envied. And he’d been the envy of every man there, having a woman like Elizabeth on his arm.
“Go on without me, Daniel. Continue to do the things we loved to do together.”
Because she’d loved that night so much, and it had shone on her face, he’d been happy to be there with her. Proud, in fact. Then last year he hadn’t attended as a single. It had been too difficult. Too many memories. And so much had happened in that year that the annual fundraiser had been the farthest thing from his mind when it rolled around again this year. Now, here he was, asked by his department head to be here.
“You’re not getting out enough,” Walter Downing had said. “I’m worried because, ever since Elizabeth, you seem to be retreating from the world. You need to shake up your life and get it going again.”
Well, things in his life were shaking up, were gradually falling back into normal place. He supposed he should look at coming to this fundraiser as part of that.
Daniel did have to admit that this event was always a nice affair. The food was good, the entertainment was above par and the speeches urging those in attendance to do their part toward the benefit of the hospital were neither grueling nor long-winded, thank God! Tonight, though, he had an idea that he was to be seated at one of the notorious singles tables as he had not marked off the “plus one” option on his RSVP. Daniel Caldwell, alone. Damn, he didn’t like the feel of that.
Sighing, Daniel made his way through the crowd and past the bar, where there were long lines of people waiting to be served. He bypassed the alcohol altogether, not that he would have minded a good, stiff drink to get him through the evening, and went off in search of his seat. The number 17 was clearly marked on a placard in the center of the table, right next to the centerpiece of pink and white carnations mingling with red teacup-rosebuds and snuggled into sprigs of greenery and baby’s breath. Two of the chairs at the table for eight were tilted up, indicating that two people had already laid claim to their spots, then wandered off. Probably to the bar, he guessed. Interestingly enough, the two reserved spots were not next to each other, so the people who’d tipped up those chairs had purposely chosen spots on opposite sides of the table. No new friendships would be forged at this table tonight, Daniel thought to himself as he pulled out a chair and seated himself.
He glanced at his watch. There were still fifteen minutes to wait. A long, boring fifteen minutes, since he doubted he’d know anyone at the table, which meant conversation would be held to a bare minimum. At least on his part it would be, as he hated shouting over the noisy crowd in the room just to be heard. Well, so be it. That was fine with him, as he didn’t have time for new friends in his life, anyway. These days, he barely had time to acknowledge his old friends, and on those occasions when he was thrown together with someone from his past it was usually someone he’d related to with Elizabeth.
Once, he’d lived in a world where his wife had been enough and now, without her, he was afraid he caused everyone around him to be uncomfortable. They didn’t know what to say or how to act since her death. There’d been some invitations to dinner or other activities at first, more out of pity than the genuine desire to entertain him. But he’d always had the graciousness to decline as he didn’t want to cause the ones asking him to feel ill at ease. Besides, he always had the excuse that he had to get home to Maddie.
Maddie might have been a convenient excuse on more than one occasion, but he truly enjoyed his limited hours with her. Wanted more of them. Envied the time his mother-in-law had with her, the parts of Maddie’s life that he was missing out on.
“Is this seat taken?” The familiar voice from beside him startled Daniel out of his deep ponderings.
He looked up, then rose slowly to his feet. “You’re assigned to the notorious singles table, too?” he asked Zoey as he pulled out the chair for her.
“Is that what this is?”
Daniel chuckled. “Always put off to the side where people don’t have to observe our awkwardness at being here alone.”
“What if being alone is a choice?” she asked, sliding into her chair.
“Then you’d prove the banquet planners wrong, since they set up all but one or two tables for couples.”
“Ah, yes. The current mindset. Better off staying home than coming alone. But you’re here alone, so how do you feel about that?”
“I’m here, but it’s not by choice.”
“You were forced?” She smiled and her blue eyes twinkled.
“Let’s just say that it was strongly recommended that I attend this year. In other words, I took the hint from my department head and came, although I’d rather be home in my jeans and T-shirt, drinking a beer, reading a story to Maddie.”
“Well, I’ve never been to one of these affairs before, so I don’t know how to respond to that.” She picked up the glass of ice water in front of her and took a sip. “But I was pleased to receive an invitation. This was my first one and I felt honored that the planners would think to include me. Call me dumb or misguided, but I’ve been looking forward to tonight for weeks. Even bought a new dress for the occasion.” She sat the glass of water down and looked over her shoulder at the crowd who were slowly migrating to their tables. “So do they expect us to whip out our checkbooks and make a contribution later on?”
“Well, they call it a fundraiser because there are a lot of dignitaries and corporate heads here, but the goal is to raise funds from them. Let them whip out their checkbooks and write the checks.”
“Then why are we here?”
“To show that we all stand behind the cause.”
“Which means they’re showing us off as one big, happy family?”
“Something like that.”
Zoey sat up straight in her seat and smiled at the man taking a seat across the table from her. “Nice size crowd,” she said to Daniel. “Is it like this every year?”
Daniel sat up straighter too but he wasn’t appraising the crowd. Instead, he was trying to catch glimpses of Zoey without her noticing. “Actually, it seems to get larger every year. I remember when they used to hold it in one of the hospital banquet rooms, but we’ve grown so much they moved it a couple years ago to this hotel.”
“Hospital services are expanding, aren’t they? I suppose that accounts for the size of the crowd—expansion equals more VIPs to court. Do you like working for such a large institution, Daniel?”
“Actually, I do. It offers a lot more medical services for its patients than a lot of other smaller hospitals can offer. So, since the goal of the hospital is to provide the best patient care we can, having better and bigger medical opportunities is a good thing. It allows me to accomplish more in the course of any given day.”
“Elizabeth was proud of your accomplishments, you know. She mentioned that several times.”
“Did she?” It was still not easy talking about Elizabeth but, surprisingly, Zoey did relieve some of that anxiety for him as she was so easy about the whole subject.
Zoey nodded. “She said you made a difference. That your work here was important.”
“Well, she was a little bit biased, I think.” He looked around at all the tables beginning to fill up, frowned and shook his head. So many tables, so many people... Not really his thing. Although, the prospect of sitting next to Zoey all evening seemed good.
“You’re frowning,” she said. “Something wrong?”
“You know, I wish they would have put me in the last row. I actually asked for that assignment, but the organizers told me those tables are reserved for latecomers.”
“The last row? Why? Because you wanted to sneak out?”
“The word sneak sounds so devious. I wouldn’t have been devious about it. Instead, I would simply have said my goodbyes and walked out the door. Tux tails flapping in the breeze, I’d be in that much of a hurry.”
“So your master plan was spoiled by your lack of proximity to the door?”
“Leaving from this spot’s not so easy.” He gestured to the back half of the room. “Too many witnesses.”
“I could almost be offended.”
“Why so?”
“You’ve got exceptional company at this table.” The table was almost full now but the only two people sat down who were talking were Daniel and Zoey. “Including me. And I take it personally that you want to escape.”
“Not escape so much as depart with an excuse.”
“Excuse?” She laughed out loud. “Like you hate banquet food, or fundraisers, or large groups of people?”
“Is this a multiple-choice quiz? Can I choose all of the above?” Amazingly, he was enjoying this conversation. As he’d noted before, talking to Zoey was so easy. He’d avoided her all during Elizabeth’s last weeks, probably because Zoey had been the constant reminder of things to come. That had been his loss, he was suddenly discovering.
“Just pretend you’re at the coffee shop right now, sitting at your table alone, reading your newspaper. Maybe that’ll get you through.”
“Right. I’m at the coffee shop with five hundred of my closest friends, all of them wearing tuxedos and formal gowns.” He cringed. “Think I’ll get myself a new coffee shop. One that’s a little more intimate and doesn’t have quite the same dress code.”
“Do you have a phobia about large crowds?”
Daniel shook his head. “Not really. It’s more of an avoidance issue, I think. I’m not a particularly good socializer around a lot of people, and I get frustrated trying to put myself out there in a situation where everyone, frankly, doesn’t care if you’re there or not. I like small groups better, and one-on-one interactions.”
“Well, I’ll bet that a couple of double Scotches will have you dancing on the table before the evening’s over.”
“A couple of double Scotches will have me dancing under the table.” The woman seated next to Zoey raised her eyebrows at the comment. “Speaking of which... Would you care for something from the bar?” Daniel stared directly into Zoey’s eyes, purposely averting his eyes from the plunge in her neckline. It was a nice dress. Golden. Formal. Glittery. It looked good against his black tux, looked so much better than her everyday work clothes, which was the only thing he’d ever seen her wear. But her dress tonight was a little more revealing than he dared think about. Temptations like that weren’t on his agenda. Not for the night. Not for the near future. And it was too soon to be admiring anything so tempting. “I’ll be glad to go get you something. A glass of wine? Maybe a mixed cocktail of some sort? Or a double Scotch?”
“I like wine, but not well enough to have you brave the bar mob. Or to risk you slipping out the side door when you have to walk by it.” She looked over at the horde of people still mingling around the bar. “You did intend on coming back to the table, didn’t you? Or were you going to use an errand of mercy as your excuse to leave?”
“I wouldn’t leave you in the lurch. You’re going to need that drink to brace yourself for the long evening ahead.”
“See, you’re spoiling this whole affair for me. I was looking forward to the evening, but you’re bringing me down with your negative attitude.” She tossed him a demure smile. “Elizabeth told me you hate black-tie affairs.”
“‘Hate’ is putting it mildly. Want me to explain how much I hate them?”
Zoey laughed. “I think you’ve already done that. Which leaves me to ask you if you’ve got a diagnosed antisocial condition?”
“Nope. No formal diagnosis. But a lot of opinion on the subject.” He smiled. “Starting with my parents and moving all the way forward to Elizabeth.”
“And you’ve always been this way? You know, crowd-hater?”
“I don’t hate crowds. I just avoid them when I can.”
“OK, then. Let’s try ‘stand-offish’.”
“It’s not so much about being stand-offish as it is being a loner. I don’t need a lot of people around me.”
“See, I’m just the opposite. I love affairs such as this one, and big crowds, and being with a group of strangers who could turn into potential friends. I’m so isolated in my work that getting out is a nice change for me.”
“You don’t date?” As soon as the words were out of his mouth he frowned and shook his head. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have asked. It’s none of my business and it was too personal.”
“It was personal. But I don’t mind you asking, because my past isn’t exactly a secret. No, I don’t really date right now. Haven’t found anyone who interests me enough to put myself out for him. And, overall, I’m not very trusting of men in general because I was married and divorced, once upon a time, and the whole situation left me nervous about trying it again.”
“It was a bad marriage?”
“Almost from the start. Which, of course, I didn’t see because I was too busy looking through the eyes of love rather than seeing what was really happening around me.”
“Consequentially, you don’t date?”
“Not that I wouldn’t date someone, if he was the right one. But after I had the wrong one...” She shrugged. “It’s left me more cautious than I probably should be.”
“So how long were you married?”
“A grand total of nine months. Six of which were long and difficult.” She took a sip of water. “He was a third-year resident who was badly in need of someone to finance his education and lifestyle. I’d just earned my doctorate in nursing so I suppose I looked like a likely candidate to him. We married fast, and divorced just as fast. And in the few months we were together he never stopped looking for his next conquest—someone with deeper pockets than mine were.”
“But were you in love?”
“Totally. For about a minute. Then I finally saw the real man behind the facade and the rest, as they say, was history.”
“Did it break your heart when it didn’t work out?”
She frowned slightly. “More like, it broke my stride. Made me jittery to try again.”
“Because you’re afraid of getting hurt?”
“Because what I’ve discovered is that, when it comes to relationships, I don’t have a clue. I made a bad mistake once and I don’t trust myself not to do it again.”
“Aren’t you being a little too hard on yourself?”
Zoey shook her head. “Better hard on myself right now than divorced another time later on.”
Daniel looked up as a tall, gawky man in a red-and-black plaid tuxedo jacket took a seat in one of the two upturned chairs, finally filling up the table. “I’m Stan Kramer,” he said, more to the air than to Daniel and Zoey. “I work in account receivables. I’m a section manager.”
Daniel extended the courtesy of introducing himself and Zoey to Stan, then he fixed his eyes on Stan’s gigantic Adam’s apple as it bobbled up and down while he gulped his cocktail. After the initial introduction, Stan made no attempt to converse any further.
After the table finally filled up, the people there began to whisper amongst themselves and, for the most part, they turned into a pleasant, chatty group. Daniel did have to admit that it was nice to be around a bunch of people who weren’t patients and who didn’t want something from him. Although, mostly, he contented himself listening to the conversations of others, only participating when someone intentionally drew him in.
“You’re not enjoying yourself,” Zoey whispered in his ear. It was a statement, not a question.
“Actually, this isn’t as bad as I thought it would be.”
“But you’re so quiet.” She bent to the left as the waiter set a plate down in front of her—chicken cordon bleu, asparagus and balsamic tomato salad.
“Because I don’t have anything to contribute.”
“You don’t really keep yourself that secluded, do you?”
He thought about her question for a moment, then shrugged. “I suppose I do. Elizabeth used to force me into the conversation—for my own good, she’d tell me. But, like I said, I’ve always been more of a loner.” Unlike his twin, Damien, who was as outgoing as they came. Introvert and extrovert. Daniel had accepted his place as the introvert a long time ago. In fact, there were times in his life when he envied Damien his outgoing ways. Like now, when his twin was off on a medical adventure down in Costa Rica. Not that Daniel wanted something like that for himself, because he didn’t. But he did admire the kind of free spirit that could simply take itself from one scenario to another at will.
“So, other than being threatened into coming, how did such a loner get himself here tonight?”
“By sheer will. It’s an important event and, while I don’t understand how my presence here makes much of a difference one way or another, I do know that the hospital needs all the support it can get. So I came.”
“Kicking and screaming?” She laughed.
“Not so much. But I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t protest a little bit.” He glanced down at the chicken cordon bleu; it actually looked good. Better than anything he fixed. His cooking nowadays consisted of whatever Maddie would eat, which didn’t include a wide variety of anything. He’d mastered spaghetti and meatballs, or “sketti,” as Maddie called it. His fridge was stocked with strawberry yogurt and there was always peanut butter. She’d eat a grilled-cheese sandwich, pizza and chicken nuggets, too. Most everything else was a struggle, so as often as not he found it easier to give in to his daughter’s limited culinary preferences. A couple times a month, though, Abby would invite him to stay for dinner when he went to pick up Maddie, and those were the times when he got to break away from his cooking doldrums. It was nice to eat the occasional adult meal, and this meal in front of him now certainly qualified as an adult meal. After his first couple bites of the chicken, he sighed. It didn’t disappoint.
“So I take it you don’t get out much,” she stated before she popped a forkful of the tomato salad into her mouth.
“With Maddie I do. On my days off. I don’t want her growing up sheltered or...well...like me. You know...crowd-hater. As much as it works for me, I see how it can be limiting, and I don’t want that for her. So I make it a point of taking her out somewhere every chance I get. Of course, I think she’s in it for the pizza she always gets afterward.”
“Maybe she’s in it because she likes spending time with her daddy.”
“That would be nice to think, but her daddy is a little stricter than Maddie likes.”
“That’s a daddy’s job.”
“Elizabeth was the soft one. Like her mother, she didn’t have the heart to refuse Maddie anything. Which put me in the position of having to be the bad guy, the one who said no, the one who enforced the discipline that Elizabeth couldn’t enforce.”
“I can’t imagine someone as young as Maddie needs much discipline.”
Daniel chuckled. “I can tell you haven’t been around kids very much. Three’s precisely the age when a child needs discipline. It’s a learning experience for them. Teach them young, and maybe you won’t have to come down so hard on them when they’re older.”
“In other words, you’re an ogre.”
“That’s a question you need to ask Maddie. She has a very distinct opinion on a whole list of subjects, and I happen to be at the top of her list.”
“Then she’s headstrong.” Zoey scooped a pat of butter off the butter plate and spread it on a roll. “Taking after her daddy, of course.”
“You think I’m headstrong?”
“I don’t know you well enough to form an opinion, but my instincts tell me yes.”
“I’ll admit it. I’m headstrong...as headstrong as you are blunt.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“You intend to be blunt?”
“I’ve practiced being blunt.” Her eyes gleamed with laughter. “It’s an acquired skill that I’ve worked on over time.”
“Let me guess. You used to be shy and retiring.”
“Something like that.”
“Hard to imagine,” he mumbled as he forked up a spear of asparagus.
He regarded her for a moment as she chewed a piece of her dinner roll. Bluntness became her. She wore it well because she wasn’t rude about it. More like, she was practical or matter-of-fact. She made an observation and was honest when she called it out. He couldn’t fault her for that. Couldn’t fault anyone who didn’t skirt around the truth.
“More like hard to overcome,” she stated after she’d swallowed. “I was always reserved and quiet when I was young. Not so much an introvert like you, but always under my mother’s thumb. She’s pretty domineering and I was the recipient of that dominance. But, in her defense, I think she was that way because it was difficult for her to raise me alone and that was her way of making sure I was being taken care of.”
“Do you still have a relationship with her?”
“A pretty good one, actually. She worries about me, but the way she expresses that worry is more like...well...nagging.” Zoey laughed. “Sometimes it gets frustrating, but I’m used to it.”
“And your father?”
“He split when I was a baby. Didn’t want the responsibility of raising a kid, even though later on he got remarried and raised another family. And never had anything to do with me.”
“Not even child support?”
“Not even child support, which my mother could have used, since she worked three jobs off and on to support us.”
“So why’d he turn his back on you?”
“Who knows? Maybe guilt? Maybe he never wanted his second wife to know that he had a daughter from another marriage. I mean, I can worry myself to death over what caused him to do what he did, or I can think of all my mother did for me and be grateful she was strong enough to give me a good life.”
“It was rough, though, wasn’t it?”
“It was. But we got along. Anyway, Elizabeth said your parents live in Florida...?”
“In a condo on the beach. Living in grand style and loving the retired life.”
“Do you see them often?”
“I haven’t been down there for years, but they manage to visit Maddie and me about once every two or three months.” He had a good relationship with them. Talked to them via the Internet every few days, mostly so Maddie could keep in touch with them and have a visual reminder of what they looked like. Emailed them occasionally, texted every once in a while when something interesting popped into his mind and snail-mailed pictures that Maddie would draw for them. All in all, he was closer to his parents now than he’d been years ago, when he’d still lived at home.
And it was a good thing, as Damien had practically dropped off the face of the earth in his newest venture. Sure, he snuck into civilization every now and again to hit up a computer for an Internet chat. He emailed whenever he could. Also, he called when he was near a cell tower. In fact, Damien even went so far as writing an occasional letter—short, to the point, often lacking in detail, but always welcome. Being in a remote jungle in Costa Rica might have hampered communication with his twin, but it didn’t cut them off.
Daniel thought back to those very bleak days when Elizabeth had been deteriorating rapidly. He’d told his twin how he was feeling, how he was doing, how he was coping, and Damien had dropped everything to rush to his side to help him through it. It was such a relief to have him there—the closeness of twins couldn’t be overexaggerated.
Sighing, as he thought back on those times, Daniel recalled how grateful he’d been to his brother for the support, and now he often caught himself wishing they could live closer together. Of course, Damien was happy in his life, where he was, doing what he was doing, and that was good. What made Damien happy made Daniel happy, as well.
* * *
Zoey was enjoying the antics of the comedian on stage who touted his credentials as a couple of late-night television appearances as well as his very own special on a comedy channel. A couple of his jokes had her laughing so hard she hurt.
“He’s good,” she said, nudging Daniel. She looked over at him to gauge whether or not he was enjoying the entertainment, but she found it difficult to tell as he had a polite, fixed smile on his face.
“He is,” Daniel agreed, his facial expression remaining flat.
“But you’re not laughing.” She wondered what, if anything, ever struck his funny bone, or was he serious all the time?
“Laughing on the inside,” he said.
“Which is no laugh at all.” Elizabeth had talked to Zoey about her fears for Daniel, one being the way he drew in on himself. Was he doing that now? Feeling guilty for having fun without her?
“It’s the best I can do. I’ve never cared that much for comedians.”
Zoey sighed out loud and tried to refocus her attention to the act.
“What?” he prodded.
“Nothing,” she said, biting back her response, as what Daniel did or didn’t do was truly none of her business.
“I know what follows that kind of sigh. Elizabeth was the master of the provoked sigh, and I’ve had a fair share of them directed at me. So let me have it.”
“It’s not my place.”
“It is if I invite you in.”
“Don’t invite me in. You might be sorry.”
“Why? Because you’re blunt?”
She tossed him a tight-lipped smile. “Something like that.”
“I’m a big boy, Zoey. I can take it.”
“But we’re not really friends. Just passing acquaintances.”
“We could remedy that.”
“How?”
“Coffee later on. Something one-on-one.”
That caught her off-guard. She didn’t think he was asking her for a date, especially after what she’d told him about her dating life. Yet, whatever his intentions were, she was hesitant to be part of them. He scared her. Filled her with mixed feelings, as she could almost picture herself together with him. But there was always that one, huge drawback, wasn’t there? First her father, then Brad... The men in her life had never worked out and she often wondered if her history was doomed to repeat itself. “Sounds nice, but I’ve got an early morning ahead of me, and it takes me quite a while to go to sleep. So, unfortunately, I think I’ll have to pass.”
“Suit yourself. But at least tell me what the sigh was about.”
“Suit yourself.” She glanced up at the stage in time to see the comedian take his final bow and disappear from the stage. “You’re here in body but nothing else, and I have a hunch you won’t allow yourself to have any real fun. That guy was a riot and you never cracked your fake smile.”
He paused before he spoke and frowned. “Elizabeth used to say the same thing about me—that I don’t know how to have fun.”
“You wouldn’t know fun if it came up and bit you on the backside.”
Before he had time to reply, one of the speakers appeared on stage and waved as the audience greeted him with thunderous applause. He was the CEO of the hospital, and Zoey assumed this was where he would make his pitch for donations. She looked over at Daniel and smiled. “Guess this cuts our conversation short,” she said, leaning over so he could hear her. “But keep in mind that having fun is...fun. You should try it sometime.”
He nodded in response and relaxed back into his chair, folding his hands on the table in front of him as if he was getting ready to take in every word of the upcoming speech. Zoey didn’t buy that for a minute, though. Daniel had tuned out the room, the speakers, and probably even her, and he was transfixed in his own little world now. His eyes glowed a distant stare and she suddenly felt sorry for him.
He kept his life so compact that he didn’t know how to open himself up to other possibilities. For another woman he might certainly be a worthy project, but for her, well, she wasn’t getting involved any more than she already was. The last thing she needed in her life was any kind of a relationship that called upon her for a fix. And a relationship of any sort with Daniel would definitely require some fixing.
Not that she didn’t have issues of her own. Because she did. But she had to solve those first before she brought anybody else into her circle.
Ten minutes into a speech that touted all the high points in the workings of a busy hospital, Zoey leaned over to Daniel and whispered in his ear, “So you think his speech will last much longer?” She wasn’t exactly bored with it, but this was definitely not the high point of her evening.
Daniel laughed out loud and drew the scowling attention of the entire table. “I think he’s probably winding down. But, if he’s not, now would be a good time for you to send me to the bar to get you a drink,” he replied. “Go with me and we can both slip out the side door.”
“What, and miss the dancing afterward? You do dance, don’t you?”
“Only under the table after a couple of double Scotches. Remember?”
So he did have a sense of humor! In spite of herself, she laughed aloud. “I’ll take a glass of white wine.”
“Large?” he asked, arching his eyebrows at her.
“Bring the whole bottle if you can.”
“The offer of coffee still stands.”
“So does my excuse for not going.”
“Ah, there you go, being blunt again.”
The older lady straight across from Daniel shushed him, causing Zoey to giggle. It wasn’t the shushing so much as the incongruity of her appearance compared to Daniel’s. He was decked out in a finely tailored tux while she wore a pink, non-formal floral dress with a large, flowery hat. She had champagne-colored hair and a sour squint to her eyes—a squint she was aiming straight at Daniel.
“Maybe bring her a drink, too,” Zoey whispered. “She looks like she needs one.”
Daniel pushed back from the table and arose to all his six-feet-plus glory. He was a good-looking man. Actually, downright handsome. Someone to swoon over. And the sour lady across from him nearly melted in her chair when Daniel turned a charming smile on her and nodded.
Damn, he had a way about him.
“I’ll be back,” he said, leaning down to whisper in Zoey’s ear. “No escaping. Promise.”
She’d never doubted that for a moment. Perhaps Daniel hadn’t wanted to come tonight but he was, if nothing else, dutiful. She’d seen that in his devotion during some very rough times with Elizabeth, and she saw that now, as he endured something he hated.
Maybe she should have accepted his invitation to coffee.
“No!” she said aloud to herself. He might have some attributes she admired, but admiration from afar was all she was going to allow herself.
CHAPTER THREE (#ulink_1785ceee-704c-5a99-9086-d3a1da2f2812)
DAMN! HE’D HOPED for a better result, but the lab tests only confirmed what he already suspected: Mr. Baumgartner had a long, rocky road ahead of him, with a questionable outcome at the end of it. His diagnosis: congestive heart failure—when the heart muscle quit pumping the blood adequately and fluid backed up in the lungs and chest cavity. Treated properly, it could be managed over an extended period of time. Left untreated, it was fatal. As for Mr. Baumgartner, it was too soon to tell what would happen to him. His case now was critical. Simply put, he’d waited too long for treatment and, as of this moment, he was dying. But Daniel hoped that could be reversed.
Daniel hated telling his patients bad news; it was the worst part about being a doctor. But bad news was everywhere, and it wasn’t like he didn’t have his fair share of cheery results, because he did. Every day. On that brighter note, however, Baumgartner was going home to adjust to the drastic changes he’d need to make in order to stay alive, and that was the best Daniel could hope for.
“Zoey,” he said into his smart phone. “It’s Daniel Caldwell.”
“Daniel. How are you?”
She sounded excited to hear him. Almost animated. He counted back the days and realized they hadn’t seen each other, nor had they talked, in nearly a month, but he’d thought about her. Oh, had he thought about her! Thought about calling her and hadn’t been able to find a reason to click her number into his cell phone. Thought about dropping into the coffee shop some afternoon, but hadn’t found a plausible excuse for wandering in at that particular time when she knew that wasn’t part of his regular schedule. “I’m fine. Hope I’m not disturbing you.”
“I’m with a patient right now, but that’s OK. She’s watching TV, and she’d rather not be disturbed when her shows are on. So I’m checking her meds, counting them to make sure she’s taken what she was supposed to and calling in prescription refills. Which means, now’s a good time.”
Something was pulling at Daniel to turn this into a social call, but the practical side of him dredged up the last time he’d asked her out to coffee. She’d refused. Turned him down colder than cold. Twice, actually, off one invitation. So he knew better than to veer off the professional path with her lest he returned with hat in hand. “Well, this won’t take long. I need a professional favor.”
“Name it,” she said cheerfully.
“I have a patient, Horace Baumgartner, who needs to go into hospice care, and I’ll be dismissing him from the hospital day after tomorrow. Is this something you can help me with?”
“Sure. Just give me the details so I can figure out what we need to do.”
“Well, going home is what he wants, and I can’t see any reason to deny him. He’s still pretty active, though weak, and I don’t think keeping him in an in-patient situation is advisable because I’m holding out some hope that we can reverse his course. I think the emotional boost he’ll get from being at home will benefit him in the long run.”
“What’s his diagnosis?”
“Congestive heart failure, end stage. If he’s diligent, we may get to keep him around for longer than what his condition dictates right now, but he’s going to have to be willing to make some drastic changes to his life.”
“Let me guess. He doesn’t want to make changes.”
“He’s nice, but he’s stubborn. What can I say?”
“Say that his unwillingness to cooperate is going to kill him. So, how bad is he?”
“Right now, bad. Blood chemistries are off, heart’s only working at half its capacity, lungs are filling up with fluid, kidneys are sluggish, extremities are swollen.”
“Well, it sounds like somebody’s got his work cut out for him, trying to motivate the fellow. Anyway, call my office and schedule an appointment for Mr. Baumgartner to meet one of the hospice nurses. Talk to Sally, the office manager, and she’ll get you started in the right direction. She coordinates all our hospice efforts, and makes the nursing and therapy assignments.”
“I could do that, but I thought that maybe you...” Who was he kidding? He’d wanted an excuse—any excuse—to call her, to hear her voice. “You know... I thought I could cut corners by calling you directly.”
“I can make the referral for you, but you’ll still have to write the orders and send them over to the office.”
He knew that, of course. But he also knew that he liked talking to Zoey on any pretense. “I’ll do that later today. Can I suggest you as Mr. Baumgartner’s nurse, though? I’ve seen you work, and I know how good you are. And I want my patient to have the best.”
“Are you trying to flatter me, Daniel?”
“Maybe a little. But what I said is true. You’re the best, and that’s why I want you on the case.”
“Well, you can suggest me, and as long as the office approves, which I’m fairly certain they will, since I’ve only just had an opening come up in my schedule. So, go ahead and name a time to meet with him in the hospital, and I’ll make the arrangements on this side of it.”
“Any time you’re free works for me.”
“Shouldn’t we be going by your schedule?” she asked him.
“My schedule is probably more flexible than yours, seeing how you have specific appointment times for your patients. It changes about fifty times a day depending on what’s going on and I’m always at liberty to make those changes if necessary. So is later today good for you, or will tomorrow work better?” Was he going to ask her out to coffee again, or leave well enough alone? Actually, he didn’t know. The practical side of him kept telling him to keep it strictly professional. But there was this little voice—a nagging little voice—that was taunting him to jump on in and try again. Did he want to date, though? Or was this more about making a connection to someone who’d touched Elizabeth’s life in such a personal way? A last desperate attempt to hold on to something he’d lost?
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