Take Me
Cherry Adair
Business exec Joshua Falcon is used to getting his way in the boardroom - and in the bedroom.And when he meets gorgeous Jessie Adams at a party, he wants her. Now. Naked in his four-poster. Together the two of them could have a hot sexual affair - with no commitments. That suits Jessie to a T. Long nights of incredible sex. No ties.All she wants is a baby by the man she's always secretly hungered for…and then she's moving on. Except Jessie and Joshua share a surprising past. One that's about to take them where they never ever expected to go…
Just have sex with me, Jessie thought, aching to say the words to Joshua
Keep it impersonal. Please. Ha, fat chance. Jessie was getting more than she’d bargained for when she’d taunted the devil into making love to her.
“Finish it,” Jessie whispered. He had already devoured every inch of her body with his mouth, teeth and tongue. She was wet with need.
“Patience.” Joshua smoothed her hair back from her damp brow, his eyes softer than she had ever seen them. “I want to look at you. You’re so beautiful and damned responsive. The perfect mistress.”
Yes, Jessie thought, an odd twinge pinching her heart. That’s what I am, a mistress. A business arrangement. Give me what I want, and I’ll give you what you want. A fair trade…
Jessie tugged at his shoulders until his heavy, welcoming weight covered hers. She reached down, her fingers closing around his hard length. It felt thick and long, silky and…alive. “I want you deep inside me,” she begged, not at all sure her body could accommodate him now that she felt the size of him.
“It’ll fit just fine, sweetheart. Trust me,” Joshua murmured, and Jessie realized she must have spoken her thought aloud.
Then with a hoarse cry he slid into her slick heat…and Jessie was lost.
Dear Reader,
What fun I had writing my first Blaze novel! I’ve been reading, and loving, these sexy, sensual books since they first hit the stands. And longed to try my hand…um…imagination at one of my own.
Joshua Falcon is The Glacier. Who could love a man as cold as ice? He doesn’t believe anyone can. Consequently, emotion has no place in Joshua’s life. But sex does! He’s a busy man, so his affairs are brief, expedient, torrid and mutually pleasurable.
Jessie Adams wants more from Joshua than his body. And she’s prepared to risk anything to get it. Once she has her heart’s desire, she’ll be on her way, thank you very much. Neither of them will be hurt, because both will have gotten exactly what they want from their affair…. Or will they?
Through sexual indulgence, Joshua and Jessie find the one thing they were missing in their lives. Love.
I hope you enjoy reading Jessie and Joshua’s story as much as I enjoyed writing it. I’d love to hear from you. Come visit my Web site at cherryadair.com or e-mail me at cherryadair@qwest.net.
Happy reading.
Smooches,
Cherry Adair
P.S. Don’t forget to check out tryblaze.com!
Take Me
Cherry Adair
To my friends at Delphi TDD with love.
You make me laugh.
And I treasure you all.
CBD
Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Prologue
“MARRY ME.”
“Excuse me?” Jessie Adams narrowed her eyes at the stranger sitting in the back booth of the diner. He hadn’t finished his first cup of coffee before he’d beckoned her back to his table.
And she thought she’d heard it all. Marry me? Oh, brother!
Outside, rain slashed in sheets across the midnight-dark parking lot, empty save for his low-slung silver sports car. Diamond drops of rain peppered his dark hair and the broad shoulders of his black wool coat. The neon café sign in the fogged window sputtered, illuminating his face.
Lord, he’s a hunk. And a welcome diversion tonight. It had been a lousy day. Week. Month. Jessie sighed. This too shall pass. She’d read that somewhere and hoped like hell it was true.
Briefly she fantasized that Prince Charming had come in for the singular purpose of sweeping her off her feet. That his proposal was for real. Unfortunately the way her luck had been running lately he was a mugger after her last twenty bucks and the take in the cash register.
She gave him another surreptitious once-over. In truth, she was like the cartoon dog chasing the car. What would she do with him if she actually caught him? The thought made her smile.
“Well?” he demanded.
“Well, what?” Jessie tried not to drool. He smelled so good she wanted to snuggle up to him, close her eyes and just inhale.
“Will you marry me?”
Be still my heart. “Is it Thursday?”
“Friday.”
“Sorry, I only marry total strangers on Thursdays.” She topped up his coffee. “You’ll have to wait ’til next week.”
“Next week is too late.” His pale gaze sharpened on her face, slid lower to her flat chest, skinny legs, then shot upward. “What the hell happened to your hair?”
Jessie’s hand rose self-consciously to the over-processed orange-yellow blotched clump. “I dyed it.” In the hope blondes had more fun. Ha!
“Whatever you were aiming for—”
Didn’t work. “I like it,” Jessie snapped. Her chest felt hard, heavy and tight. He was a stranger. Why did she care what he thought of her hair? “Drink up. We close in twenty minutes.” Thoughts of midnight reminded her of more pressing problems. The two-week notice to vacate her studio apartment had four days left. So far, she hadn’t found anything else affordable. She’d move to Sacramento or Tahoe. If she had more than twenty-seven dollars to her name. If her mother’s boyfriend hadn’t shown up and swiped her car. And if she—
“You’re perfect.” The man’s sexy drawl stopped her from turning away. “I have a proposition for you.”
I just bet you do. “Listen, pal, my feet hurt, I have to finish my shift, and as much as I’d like to sit and schmooze, I have to clean the kitchen before I go, so if you don’t mind…”
“Hear me out—”
Jessie wrote his ticket and slapped it on the table. “If you want more coffee, help yourself.”
There wasn’t much to do in the spotless kitchen. Other than a couple of truckers at dinner, she’d been alone all night, which meant zilch in tips. Jessie finished loading the dishwasher, then turned to see the guy, hands in the pockets of his coat, standing in the kitchen watching her.
She knew exactly what this sophisticated man saw. She was no beauty. She was too thin, and if she was ever going to get boobs, she hoped it was before she was old enough for them to sag. Her mutilated hair was scraped away from her face and piled untidily on top of her head like orange and yellow straw. All she had going for her were her eyes. Some trucker had once told her they looked like cow eyes. She wasn’t so sure it was a compliment, but at least he’d been sincere.
“How old are you?”
“Boy, you’re persistent. Has anyone ever told you no?”
“One too many times. How old?”
Jessie tilted her head and eyed him with undisguised curiosity. He appeared rich, spoiled and used to getting his own way. He had beautiful hands. Long, strong, tanned fingers with clean, shiny nails. Jessie always noticed hands.
She automatically hid her bitten nails behind her back. “Twenty…five.”
He laughed. It sounded rusty. “Nice try, honey.”
“Twenty-one.”
“Legal.”
Jessie backed up against the refrigerator as he strolled toward her. There wasn’t a snowball’s chance of anyone coming in at this hour of the night. He could do anything to her, and no one would know. She flinched when he touched her face. She really shouldn’t have been sarcastic last week when the car had been stolen and she’d asked God, “What else can happen?” God didn’t like sarcasm. It was Jessie’s curse. She sighed. She supposed this guy was better than being struck by lightning.
“Perfect.” He turned her chin this way and that, his hand warm on her skin. He smelled even better close up. Jessie’s mouth actually watered. Instinctively, she understood he had no sexual interest in her, no need to control or dominate. Her heart wasn’t pounding because she was afraid of him…not very anyway.
“How about this, pal? I give you ten seconds to take your hands off me, or I call the cops?” His hand dropped, but the ghost of his light, warm touch lingered on her skin. “What do you want from me?” Jessie asked hoarsely.
“I want you to marry me. Now. Tonight. We’ll drive into Tahoe, get married and I’ll have you back in time for your next shift.”
“You’re crazy!”
“I’m desperate,” he countered, voice grim.
Who isn’t, pal? “Why me?” Jessie slid out of his reach and walked back into the brightly lit diner. He was right behind her. He grabbed a mug off the stack behind the counter and followed her back to his table by the window.
What on earth was a guy like this doing here? The diner wasn’t his kind of place. The only reason people stopped here at all was that it was right on the California border into Nevada. The small coffee shop mirrored a million others across the country. Red vinyl seats, worn down by a million butts, beige Formica tables scarred by cigarette burns, tacky Christmas decorations. The invasive smell of grease and food had permeated the plastic plants hanging in dusty profusion from toggle hooks in the yellowed ceiling.
Jessie tried to ignore the décor. Sometimes she physically ached for beauty. For stability. For some damn thing that couldn’t be conned, stolen or sweet-talked from her.
She wasn’t opposed to working, but it would be nice to get a break for a change. Unfortunately she wasn’t delusional enough to believe a total stranger would stroll into the diner two days before Christmas and sweep her off her worn tennies and lay all that at her feet.
“I’ll make this short and sweet.” The stranger took the carafe out of her hand and motioned her to the opposite seat, then filled both cups and placed the coffeepot in the neutral territory between them. Intrigued in spite of herself, Jessie flopped down on the scarred vinyl seat.
“This is purely a business proposition.” He raked his fingers through his dark hair. It fell neatly back in place. Figures. “Here’s the situation. My father and his brother owned a development company. My father died ten years ago, he left the company to my uncle Simon with the understanding his half would in turn go to me. I’ve worked my ass off while my cousin Paul gallivants around the world doing God knows what. That company is fifty percent mine. I’ve earned it, damn it. Now Simon wants to retire, but he insists Paul and I settle down before he gives his company to a couple of ‘playboys’—his quote. My uncle, in his infinite wisdom, has decided Paul and I should settle down and get married.”
Jessie’s eyed him skeptically. “For real?”
He nodded curtly. “Unfortunately, yes. To top it all off, the first one to marry gets controlling shares. Simon is obsessed with this ludicrous notion.”
“So, what’s the problem? A good-looking, rich guy like you must have a gazillion women to choose from.”
“I asked someone,” he said tightly and with obvious reluctance. “She said yes—to my cousin.”
Jessie cradled her forgotten mug between her hands. “Ouch. There must be someone else you cou—”
“They’re getting married in San Francisco tomorrow at noon. Our meeting up tonight is going to work out to both our advantages. I’m sure you’d like financial freedom. Do whatever you like? Go anywhere? Sure you do. And all I want is a contract marriage. I’m not interested in emotional entanglements. I don’t want a real wife, I want a wife on paper. Now. Tonight.”
He glanced down at her 34A chest and her name tag. “Marry me, Vera. I’ll give you a monthly allowance for as long as you live. Hell. I’ll buy this damn diner for you if you want it.”
Jessie stifled an hysterical laugh. Her name tag had been left over from the last waitress, and she hadn’t cared what people called her. “I don’t want the diner.” Just looking at him made her silly heart do summersaults.
“Listen, having control of this company means everything to me.” His eyes glowed pale and determined. “Surely you’ve wanted something this badly in your life?” He leaned forward. “Do this for me, and when the time comes, if there’s something you want more than your next breath, I’ll make it happen. You have my word on it.”
“Anything, huh?”
“Anything.”
Lust at first sight. The attraction she felt for this man was undeniable. But then what was not to attract? He was unbearably handsome, strong, powerful, wealthy and, most dangerous of all, he needed her. The attraction was obviously not reciprocated in the least. However, Cinderella hadn’t complained when her prince whipped her out of the kitchen.
“How do I know you’re on the level?” Oh, please, be serious.
He pulled a business card from his wafer-thin leather wallet and a cell phone from his overcoat pocket. “Here’s my lawyer’s card. Call him, confirm who I am, ask about my uncle’s ultimatum.”
Jessie took the card. She was nuts, she was crazy, she was out of her mind for even considering his proposition…. What did she have to lose?
She reached for the phone and began punching in the numbers before she thought to ask, “What’s your name?”
“Joshua Falcon.”
The man on the other end of the phone was not happy to be woken by a lunatic stranger at midnight. Jessie stumbled through enough questions to confirm that Joshua Falcon was who he said he was, and was richer than Croesus.
The lawyer wanted to talk to Mr. Falcon. Right now. Jessie handed him the phone and slumped back, openly eavesdropping.
Watching her, he spoke into the phone. “You’re damn right I’m serious.” He listened for a while. “In a diner on the California-Nevada border.” He looked over at her, his pale eyes narrowing. “Why wouldn’t she? She’s probably getting minimum wage and living in a cramped apartment with her cat. I’ll fax a copy of the marriage license and bring the original to your office later.” There was a short pause. His laugh made Jessie shiver. “No honeymoon. I’ll have her call you back to make arrangements for the settlement.”
Joshua listened. “No need for sarcasm. She’s worth more than her weight in gold. Oh, and Felix? Call Simon as soon as you get my fax.” There was a long pause as he listened. “All right,” he agreed with some reluctance. “Take the Lear and meet us at the courthouse in Reno at nine. You can hand deliver the marriage certificate to my uncle.”
He folded the compact phone and stuffed it into his pocket.
“I don’t have a cat.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“I said I don’t—”
“That was rhetorical. Get your coat,” he said, impatiently buttoning his own. He tossed a twenty on the table.
“I don’t have a coat, either.”
“You don’t have a coat?”
“Gee, is there an echo in here?”
Scowling, he removed his coat and tossed it to her. “Put this on and let’s get this over with.”
“Wow, you certainly know how to bowl a girl over with sweet talk.” The wool coat smelled of him. It was thick and dark, and held the scent of potent male and fresh citrusy cologne. Jessie’s insides turned to mush. She had that standing-on-the-highest-diving-board feeling. Exhilarating, thrilling terror.
“Christ.” He watched as she turned off lights. “I must be more tired and desperate than I thought.”
Jessie froze with the keys in her hand. “Listen, bub, I didn’t come in here on my knees begging you, did I? Make up your mind.” The keys dug into her soft palm. “Well?” She glared at him. “Do you want to marry me or not?”
He looked down at her. “God help me. Yes.”
AT 9:45, Joshua slapped the marriage certificate into the hands of his lawyer, Felix Montgomery.
At 9:46, he walked out of the courthouse.
He did not look at Jessie once.
Prince Charming didn’t even kiss the bride.
1
December
Seven Years Later
PARTY GUESTS, dressed in holiday finery, ebbed and flowed through Simon Falcon’s home. From a safe distance, Jessie watched her husband scan the festive throng with pale, bored eyes. Born to wear the stark black tux and crisp pleated shirt, every immaculate inch of him screamed wealth and bone-deep self-confidence. With his aristocratic features and go-to-hell eyes, he was like a king surveying his kingdom. And the dangerous edge of his sex appeal was universal enough to make every female head turn.
Seven years hadn’t changed him. But she’d changed considerably. No way would Joshua recognize the woman he only knew as his absentee waitress-wife, Vera. And only she knew her sophistication was nothing more than a thin patina. Her standards were now extremely, and friends told her, unreasonably, high. So be it. She was perfectly content with her life just the way it was, thank you very much. There was only one thing she wanted from Joshua Falcon.
Their marriage had given him control of Falcon International. Now it was her turn to get something she desperately wanted from their marriage.
More than anything on earth, Jessie wanted a child.
And Joshua was going to make that dream come true.
He’d promised to give her whatever she wanted more than anything else in the world.
Now she was collecting.
A couple of months ago Jessie had instructed her lawyer to inform her husband she was ready to make her request. Joshua had complied immediately. He’d offered to pay for the insemination process at the in-vitro fertilization clinic of Vera’s choosing.
Jessie wasn’t sure what she’d expected him to do. But sending her off to a clinic to accept some stranger’s donation wasn’t it! The whole point here was that she wanted her husband’s baby.
The good news was he obviously had no interest in children, nor did he want anything to do with any progeny. Which was fine and dandy with Jessie. What he didn’t want, he wouldn’t take away.
She squared her shoulders and took a fortifying sip of wine. Exhilaration made her heart pump harder. She resisted the urge to run her hands over her hips to make sure the silk jersey wasn’t bunched anywhere, then righted the circlet of holly she’d woven into a wreath for her hair. Feeling like a gunslinger checking his holster, she choked back a laugh.
The smile died on her lips as she caught Joshua’s gaze, holding it, although it took every ounce of her newfound sophistication to do so. Her chin lifted a notch and she saw his lips twitch. Their eyes locked as he started across the room toward her. Blood pounded in her ears. Forty feet…thirty feet…don’t talk to him, lady!…eighteen feet…
Joshua was taller, fitter, better looking than any other man in the room. Her heart pounded so hard she barely felt the individual beats. Everything about him assaulted her senses as he moved inexorably toward her. Adrenaline raced in effervescent bubbles through her bloodstream. The wine was tasteless as she took a gulp then held the cool glass against her hot cheek. Sixteen feet…
Simon almost gave her heart failure as he came up beside her and circled his arms around her waist. She hadn’t noticed his approach. He kissed her cheek. “You look like a Christmas angel in that red dress, honey. What are you staring at so intently— Oh, Joshua’s here.”
“Stay, Simon.” Jessie held on to his arm like a life-line. “Just long enough to introduce us, okay?”
“Are you sure you know what you’re doing, Jessie?”
She’d fibbed to Joshua’s uncle, only telling him half her plan. Her laugh sounded strained even to her own ears. “No.”
For seven years she’d imagined making love with Joshua. She’d dreamed about it. Longed for it. Ached for it. Every time she read about him, either in the business section of the newspaper or a sleazy tabloid, Jessie had wished she were the woman on Joshua’s arm. In his bed.
She’d tried unsuccessfully to banish her husband from her mind and heart while putting her nose to the grindstone in the intervening years. She’d finished high school, gone to college, all the while carefully managing to avoid him. Until tonight.
Now there was method to her madness.
The physical attraction she was experiencing was as powerful, as terrifying now as it had been all those years ago in the diner. Lust made her mission easier. And if the feelings were reciprocated…
It had taken forever, yet, in a second, he was right there within touching distance. His cologne was more subtle, more sophisticated, than she remembered, but the base scent, the essence of the man, remained. She’d never felt more female in her life as Joshua’s hot gaze burned through the thin silk of her dress to the pulsing skin beneath.
“Simon.” Joshua greeted his uncle, his voice low and husky, his eyes on Jessie.
“Joshua.” Simon sounded atypically jovial as he clasped his nephew’s hand. “How’re you doing, son?”
“Introduce me to the lady.” Joshua watched the sunrise of a blush paint her cheeks as he allowed the heat of his gaze to travel slowly from her lush mouth to her eyes and back to her mouth. A cloud of dark, Raphaelite curls framed her face and drifted about her shoulders as she looked up at him. Her brows, dark and silky, formed a gentle arch above eyes of sparkling chocolate brown.
Joshua had reluctantly accepted Simon’s heavy-handed invitation to the Christmas party. He didn’t do Christmas. For a second when he’d spotted the dark-haired beauty beside his uncle, he’d imagined she was Simon’s surprise. Considering every surprise he’d ever had at this time of year was a bad one, and familiar with his uncle’s wily manipulations, he’d almost turned around and driven up to his cabin in Tahoe as he did every year during the holidays.
He felt sufficiently mellow to wait his uncle out. With her supple, slender body, she was enough of an inducement to make him stay. For now. Her subtle fragrance teased him. A holly wreath nestled in her dark hair. Her skin looked smooth and pale against the flame-red floor-length gown. The matte fabric covered her from throat to ankle in a sensuous sweep, without showing so much as a panty line.
He felt a rush of heat as her small breasts shifted with her breathing. She was doing her damnedest to appear unaffected, but the lady was as aware of him as he was of her.
Joshua felt the familiar adrenaline rush for the start of the chase and wondered if she, too, was thinking of tangled sheets and sweat-dampened skin.
“Jessica Adams, my nephew, Joshua Falcon.”
Her name was familiar. “You’re the interior decorator my uncle’s always talking about. You do good work.”
A grin tugged at the corner of her mouth. “Thanks. Simon and Patti are always a pleasure to work with.”
And she’d be a pleasure to have in his bed. “Go away, Simon,” he told his uncle without looking at him. Jessie’s mouth curved slightly as she observed him maneuvering his uncle. Joshua couldn’t remember reacting so explosively to a woman in his life. The shiny strings of the tiny Christmas balls in her ears tangled in the darkness of her hair. She rubbed her wineglass against the pulse pounding at her throat.
He used every vestige of control to keep from tossing her over his shoulder caveman style and dragging her to his lair.
The very thought startled him. He was not an impulsive man, nor was he given to flights of fancy. He stuffed his hand in his pocket. He was almost tempted to cut his losses and walk away. Sex was one thing, an excess of emotion another.
Hell. Christmas always brought out the worst in him.
He knew he was looking at Jessie with unabashed hunger. His blood pressure shot up another ten points as he heard her stifle a moan. “Are you here alone?” he asked.
She either was or wasn’t available. He’d never competed for a woman in his life. Although, Joshua thought, surprised by his reaction, he might be tempted in her case.
She smiled. “Just me and 299 party guests.” She had an extraordinary mouth, generous, her lips pouty without being petulant. Joshua needed a taste. Just one. He almost leaned over to take it but managed to remain fixed in place, his libido jumping. She was available, he wanted her and she appeared interested. It was turning out to be a good party, after all.
He smiled. “Can I take you home?”
“Actually, I just got here,” she drawled, eyes bright. “But thanks for offering. Simon,” she turned to his uncle with a smile that made Joshua’s skin tingle, “I’d love another glass of this excellent Chateau Whatever.”
Simon gave them both a pointed glance before he snatched her glass and went off to the kitchen.
Jessie tilted her head a little to look up at him. Brown eyes twinkled as bronze lights of laughter danced in the sparkling depth. She was all sass and flirty eyes. And damn well irresistible. Joshua wanted to bury his hands up to his elbows in her hair, assure himself that it was as soft as it looked. He wanted to run his fingers along her slender curves. He wanted to lay her on cool sheets in a candlelit room and make love to her until she melted like warm honey.
But first things first.
“Before we leave,” he said flatly. “I need to make something perfectly clear. I’m married.”
Obviously taken aback she gave him a startled look. “Goodness, a philanderer with integrity. How refreshing.”
He realized he’d tensed for her response. There was something about her that led him to believe she was nothing like his female companions to date. He hadn’t paused to wonder why he’d told her the truth when he’d never bothered to tell anyone else before. She’d be just as capable as any other woman to run directly to the tabloids with the news flash.
His marriage wasn’t a marriage at all. It was a piece of paper, nothing more. He knew it, the girl knew it. But this woman, with her glowing eyes and ripe mouth, might not understand.
For the first time since he was a boy, Joshua felt a flush ride his cheekbones. “It’s purely a business arrangement. She doesn’t give a damn what I do. We’ve been separated for seven years.”
“Poor her.”
“The arrangement was mutually agreed on,” he said flatly.
“Why bother telling me?”
“Because I don’t want any misunderstandings. I’m powerfully attracted to you. Hell, flat-out, I want you, Jessie Adams. But I’m not interested in a long-term entanglement, and marriage will never be on the table.”
“Because you’re already married.”
“Because I never have, nor will I ever have, any interest in the state of holy matrimony. I married to facilitate a business deal, she married me for money. If this is a problem, tell me now.”
“The problem,” Jessie said sweetly, “is I don’t care one way or the other. And I think it’s a bit presumptuous of you to think I would since we’ve known each other all of two minutes. Your marital status has no effect on me at all one way or the other.”
“Good.” Joshua only now realized how damned boring life had been lately. It had been a long time since he’d felt the roar of his blood and the thrill of the chase.
“Let me guess. Your wife’s a petite, blue-eyed blonde?”
Joshua stared at her blankly. He vaguely remembered Vera as a tall, skinny…blonde? Redhead? Whatever. Somehow he’d lost control of the conversation. He wasn’t sure where or why, but it mildly annoyed him. “What’s that got to do with anything?”
Brown eyes gleamed devilishly. “I’m trying to point out that I’m not your type.”
“How do you know what my type is?”
Jessie fluttered her long eyelashes at him. “Small, blond and busty. Would you like me to name them for you?”
“I think I can remember,” Joshua said dryly, narrowing his eyes in mild annoyance. CEOs had quailed at that look. She—damn her sassy hide—had the nerve to grin.
“And why would you be so interested in my lady friends?” he asked silkily, suddenly finding tall, slender dark-haired women extremely appealing. The air about her seemed to crackle with electricity.
“What?” Little Miss Sass was distracted for a moment watching his mouth. “It’s hard to miss your exploits when every tabloid and newspaper finds the subject absolutely fascinating.”
A point to the lady for her swift recovery.
Joshua glanced down. Her nipples were clearly delineated by the fabric of her dress. As he watched, the small buds peaked. He stifled a groan and shifted his stance.
“Lord,” she said, voice thick, “you are direct, aren’t you?”
“If I was any more direct, I’d come right out and tell you I want to take you to bed.”
She smiled. “I believe you just did.”
“I’m hardly the first man who’s wanted to sleep with you.”
“You’re the first man who’s said it straight out within moments of meeting me, with about three hundred witnesses.” She didn’t move away as he rested his hand on the small of her back. He could almost feel her skin vibrate beneath his fingers.
“I want to see you.”
“You are seeing me.”
“Without all these people around.”
“If you’re staying with Simon for the weekend, we should bump into each other sometime.”
“That’s a little too vague for me.” He scanned her animated face. Her eyes still danced as she crossed her arms over her chest. At the view of her plumped breasts on the shelf of her arms, his mouth went dry.
He wanted her. He planned to have her. Soon.
“Several of us are going parachuting tomorrow, and since it’s too far to drive home, then back again so early in the morning, I’m spending the night here. You’re welcome to join us, Joshua.”
Her husky voice saying his name made him want to yank her into his arms. He craved her mouth under his. He wanted to back her against the wall and have her, right there in Simon’s sunken living room, in front of hundreds of guests. Lord. He couldn’t remember ever being this hot, this fast.
Jessie glanced at him under her lashes. She took a small step back. “I’ve heard people should live life as if their personal diary would be published in the newspaper every day.” She looked up at him with those big brown eyes. “I’ve read your personal diary in the tabloids for years. Just standing here talking to you is going to give me notoriety I’ve never had before. I’m not sure I’m ready for prime time.”
More than likely their first meeting would be splashed across every tabloid by tomorrow morning. He didn’t give a damn—unless she cashed in on his weak moment of honesty concerning his marriage. Then every snoop reporter in the country would be on the hunt for Vera.
Despite the risk, pursuing Jessie held an indefinable, underlying attraction that had nothing to do with her slender body. Something about her made his heart go from zero to a hundred in seconds and he’d be damned if he knew why.
“Do you realize,” he asked, his voice thick, “that we’re standing right under the mistletoe?”
Her long lashes fluttered as she glanced up, then directly into his eyes. Yes, her eyes told him. Of course she knew where they stood.
“Lord, woman, don’t look at me like that.” He didn’t recognize the roughness in his own voice. “What do I have to give you for just one kiss?”
“Here?” Jessie scanned the room.
“Yes, damn it.”
“Chloroform?”
“Oh,” he mocked, “I think I can find something that works just as well and is far more accessible.” He hailed a waiter, and handed her two brimming glasses of pale wine. “Here.”
Jessie automatically clutched both glasses as she looked up at him. “What am I supposed to d—”
He touched her cheek, just the barest of touches, and she closed her eyes, tilting her face up. He kissed her softly on the mouth. Christ, it was as bad as eating one damn peanut. She tasted of Simon’s excellent Chateau Coutet, laughter and something he couldn’t quite put a name to.
His fingers tightened briefly in the springy silk of her hair as her tongue shyly touched his. His lips moved with expertise over hers, Jessie’s lashes fluttered then drifted closed. He felt her small breasts brand his chest as she leaned into him. He swallowed her ragged moan as he deepened the contact and lost himself in her response.
And then she was gone.
One moment he was standing with an armful of pliant willing woman, the next he was holding two dripping glasses and she was several feet away.
“Give me a call sometime.” Jessie fluttered her fingers and melted into the crowd, disappearing from view before he could recover.
Joshua felt as if he’d been poleaxed.
JESSIE’S PURPLE-AND-PINK parachute floated over the vineyard toward the eucalyptus tree windbreak on the south side of the clearing near Simon’s house. Joshua shaded his eyes against the sharp winter sun and scowled. He’d had precious little sleep the night before. Thinking about her, knowing she slept under the same roof, had caused him to toss and turn. So near and yet so far.
In his imagination she’d appeared larger than life somehow. Vibrant and intoxicatingly alive. She had what the French called je ne sais quoi, an indescribable something.
Joshua didn’t consider himself a fanciful man, but he needed to see Jessie Adams again. Needed to assure himself that what he remembered from the night before was as simple as her unmistakable sex appeal.
Joshua enjoyed sex. He considered himself a considerate lover. He wanted Jessie. It seemed simple enough. And yet… He narrowed his eyes trying to put his finger on it. There was more to her. Something complex. Something intriguing. Something, damn it, that called to much more than his libido.
Which was, of course, a ridiculous assumption based on a few minutes of conversation the night before.
He wanted to chat with her once more before he left to drive back to San Francisco. Get rid of this stupid fantasy he’d built up during the night. Frankly, he reminded himself grimly, he didn’t have the emotional fortitude to deal with a woman for more than companionship and sex.
They didn’t call him The Glacier for nothing.
High above him, a gust took hold of the thin silk, and Jessie’s slender arms madly manipulated the controls against the sudden shift in wind direction. She was losing the battle.
“Hell.” Joshua started to run as her feet skimmed the treetops. Behind him, the follow vehicle revved, then bit a wheelie into the dirt road running alongside the vines behind Simon’s house. Joshua sprinted to the other side of the trees just in time to see the billowing silks covering Jessie’s prone body.
Roughly he gathered the fabric, flinging it behind him until he unveiled her. She looked up into his face and grinned.
“God, that was fabulous!” She sat up, brushing twigs and dirt off her arms. A skintight purple and fuchsia spandex bodysuit clung to every sleek, tight inch of her long body.
“You little idiot,” Joshua said furiously, his heart still pounding. “You could’ve been killed.”
Jessie’s hand stilled and her smile slipped a little as she unbuckled her fuchsia helmet and tugged it off. Something he didn’t recognize flared in her eyes.
“Yeah, my landing left a little to be desired.” She tossed her braid over her shoulder. “I’ll have to work on that.” She stuck out a hand. “Pull me up.”
He hadn’t imagined it. She seemed to inhale life, to eat it with a spoon, relishing each delicious moment at a time. He knew she’d be like that in bed. Eager. Hot. Passionate and wild. He could drown in those hot, brown eyes. “You like living dangerously, don’t you?”
“You have no idea,” Jessie managed to say breathlessly as he suddenly tugged on her hand, drawing her to her feet and against his chest in one quick move.
“I want to taste it on you.” Joshua breathed in her already familiar scent that even dust and eucalyptus couldn’t mask.
“Taste what?” she asked, a hairsbreadth away from his mouth. She looked up at him, her hand in his against his chest. Her fingers flexed under his but her eyes were steady. “Taste what?” she repeated, her husky voice low.
“Danger.” He brought his mouth down on hers like a starving man at a banquet. He knew after he’d slept with her a few times the gnawing want would lessen and become manageable enough to ignore.
Jessie’s lips held the sheen of his kiss as he stepped away from her. Joshua handed her the helmet. “I’ll call you January first,” he told her. Ignoring her bemused look, he turned and walked away. It was one of the hardest things he’d done in years.
He walked faster.
2
AS PROMISED, Joshua called Jessie on New Year’s Day.
Jessie made sure she wasn’t home.
He called again on the second, the third and the fifth. She’d let the answering machine pick up while she sat in her kitchen listening, his tone getting progressively cooler and more impatient with each call.
Joshua had left half a dozen imperious messages in the last two weeks. She had no intention of falling over herself to call him back. Obviously he wasn’t used to being ignored.
She knew she was playing a dangerous game. There was a fine balance as she waited for the timing to be right without causing Joshua to lose interest.
Soon. Very soon, Jessie thought as she drove onto the narrow road leading up to the gatehouse. She’d been startled, no, stunned, when Joshua had admitted he was a married man. His honesty, not only in acknowledging his marriage, but the status of that marriage, had confused her.
If she hadn’t been his wife she would’ve politely walked away. Her mother had had plenty of married lovers. The ending was always sad and messy.
She sighed. His honesty had disarmed her and made her feel a little guilty about what she was about to do. But he was still The Glacier. Cold. Hard. Ruthless. He was still her absentee husband. He was still the man who was going to give her her heart’s desire. A baby. Born in wedlock.
It was the second week of the new year and cold for Northern California. The wind cut through her jacket as Jessie got out of the car. It was after three and she’d missed lunch looking for a particular wallpaper sample at the design center in the city. Her stomach growled.
The little cottage welcomed her with warmth as she quickly closed the front door behind her and headed for the kitchen. She loved the carriage house. It was home. Safe, warm, welcoming, and as permanent a home as she’d ever had. Joshua’s lawyer, Felix Montgomery, had taken her under his wing and introduced her to his son Conrad that dizzying day seven years ago.
Con had offered her not only the use of the gatehouse, but also a job in his architectural company while she went back to school. Conrad and his partner, Archie, had converted the gatehouse cottage into a charming home for her, then later incorporated the studio when she’d gone to work for Conrad full-time as an interior designer.
They’d helped her transform her life and, in the process, the two men had become her dearest friends and the brothers she’d never had.
The phone rang. Jessie turned off the machine. “Hello?”
“Where in the hell have you been?”
She dragged in a breath. “I believe you have the wrong number,” and hung up.
The phone rang again. Jessie tossed a tea bag in a mug of water and stuck it in the microwave. The phone continued ringing. The microwave dinged. She squeezed out the bag and poured in a little milk. “Hello?”
“This is extremely time-consuming,” Joshua said with a great deal of annoyance.
“Who is this?”
There was a pause. “Joshua Falcon.”
“Oh. Sorry. I’ve been getting a lot of crank calls,” Jessie told him sweetly. She sipped her tea and burned her tongue. She sat down at the small round table in a weak ray of sunshine and unhooked the calendar beside the phone.
“I’ve been calling you for weeks.”
“Darn. And I kept missing you.” She didn’t bother trying to sound too sincere. “I’ve been so busy.”
“So have I,” he said coolly. “I just returned from an important business trip, but I made time to call you anyway.”
Jessie grinned. “Where did you go?” Her stomach growled.
“Ireland.”
“I’ve always wanted to travel. Tell me about it.” She dragged the cord over to the cupboard and scanned her soups.
Talking to him on the phone was easier, safer, than in person. She couldn’t see his eyes. Or his mouth. Or smell his cologne. She wanted a baby from this man. She did not want to fall in love with him.
Jessie refused to go there. That path was rocky and filled with potholes. Fortunately, she’d outgrown the gigantic crush she’d had on him years ago. She’d seen what love had done to her mother. No, thank you very much. That wasn’t for her. Mutual attraction would get the job done. Quick. Painless. Satisfying. No fuss. No muss. It might be cold-blooded, but she’d know who her child’s father was. No one would get hurt. Everyone would get what they wanted.
It was a good plan.
She prayed she’d get pregnant immediately.
She held the phone between chin and shoulder as she found a bowl, opened a can of tomato soup and added water and milk to her late lunch.
Joshua gave her the Reader’s Digest travel tour of Ireland while she mumbled “Hmmm” and “Fascinating” at appropriate moments. And it would have been if she wasn’t so uptight about seeing him again. At this rate, she’d develop indigestion.
She was sure as soon as she saw him the panicky feeling she’d been experiencing would pass. Between her “schedule” and his business travel, she’d managed to avoid him since Simon’s Christmas party. Unfortunately January was a slow month in the interior design business, and she could’ve used the distraction of being genuinely busy. She’d have to see him soon, even if the timing wasn’t right.
“All right. Enough about my trip.” He sounded exasperated. “When the hell am I going to see you?”
“How about tomorrow night?” Jessie glanced at the calendar where the next night had been marked with an X. She’d calculated just how long she could keep him dangling. She didn’t want to see him one second more than necessary. Her attraction to him was already putting a crimp in her plans. She had to stay focused, no matter what.
“Tonight,” he insisted.
“I’m busy tonight.” She lied cheerfully, getting up to place her empty bowl and spoon in the sink. “I’m free tomorrow night or next Wednesday. Your choice.” Next Wednesday was circled in red. And underlined. She closed her eyes and prayed he’d pick door number two.
“I’ll pick you up tomorrow night at seven.”
“I’ll meet you at Noble’s, near Fisherman’s Wharf, at seven-thirty,” she said, resigned. There was a long pause. Jessie held her breath. Had she pushed him too far?
He laughed sardonically. “God, you’re ornery. All right. Noble’s. Seven-thirty.” The dial tone buzzed in her ear.
She collapsed back in her chair, eyes closed. She’d done it. She picked up the calendar and ran her finger tenderly around the dates she’d marked in red and underlined. The nights for conception. All she had to do was hold him off a week, until her next ovulation. The prize was worth any discomfort she might feel, any small niggling twinge of conscience she might have. All she had to do was stick to her plan without deviating and she’d walk away with the grand prize.
JESSIE WAS COOL, calm and collected when she walked into Noble’s restaurant at precisely seven-thirty the next night. She wore a simple royal-purple dress with a jewel neckline and cap sleeves. Sophisticated and sexy enough to hold him off while beckoning him closer.
Joshua rose to greet her. The hem of her dress suddenly felt way too short, the silk far too thin, clinging to her body in a way it hadn’t done at home.
“Hello, Jessie. You’re more gorgeous than the last time I saw you.” His pale eyes gleamed in the candlelight as he took her hand, and drew her onto the banquet seat beside him. A sizzle of electricity arced up her arm.
“The last time you saw me I was covered in dirt.” God, but he smelled good. He looked virile and alarmingly masculine. And he was sitting far too close. Jessie tried to scoot up against the window.
“You were covered in skintight Lycra.” His breath fanned her mouth. She struggled to draw in air, mesmerized by his silvery gaze as he whispered huskily. “I’ve dreamed about peeling you out of it for weeks.”
Jessie paused a beat for her nerves to steady, then reached for the menu. If she handled this right, she could make the next date for the following week when it would count. One dinner for one night in his bed. Two dates. I can do this. I can.
“The seafood here is fabulous.” Her pulse throbbed in her ears. She willed herself to relax. She knew the outcome of tonight. He didn’t.
The waiter arrived. “Two specials,” Joshua said, neither consulting her nor taking his eyes off her for a second.
His broad chest, covered in shirt, tie and jacket, was inches away. She had a lustful vision of it quite naked. Would his chest be sleek and smooth, or sprinkled with hair? It was alarming how badly she wanted to touch him to find out. “Perhaps I’d like something else.”
“So would I.” Joshua brushed a wisp of hair away from her cheek. His touch was electrifying. “But I’m not going to get it before we eat.” She must have looked as blank as she felt. He gave her a wry smile. “I don’t give a damn what the specials are, as long as it’s served fast.”
Jessie controlled a bubble of hysterical laughter. “We could’ve gone to McDonald’s.”
“This was your choice.”
“I’m starving.” God. If they were this hot for each other they’d burn each other to cinders.
He slid from his seat and held out his hand.
“Where are we going?” Jessie took his hand automatically.
“To dance,” he said thickly. “I have to hold you.” He pulled her up, then maneuvered her to the small, empty dance floor and tugged her into his arms.
It felt good pressed against the length of him like this. Far too good. Jessie tried to put a little space between them. Joshua’s arms tightened in a firm, inexorable embrace.
The solid width of his chest felt like heaven beneath her hand. She looked up at him. Would her baby have Joshua’s nose? His pale-blue eyes? His mouth?
The small band in the corner played something soft and bluesy. Lord, this is dangerous, Jessie thought, as Joshua moved her expertly around the floor. And expertly against him. She should have been shocked by the hard length of his erection pressed against her. Instead her heart leaped, and her skin heated. Her nipples puckered and rubbed against the inside of her bra. She moved a little closer, allowing the slide and sway of their bodies to ease the ache a little. He brought his hand up between their bodies, and clasped her hand against his chest. The backs of his fingers brushed against her nipple making her shudder with longing.
It was no accident. Of course it wasn’t. He kept up the slight friction, until Jessie wanted to scream.
His hand felt warm through the thin silk at the small of her back as he pulled her more snugly against him. His thumb moved in a maddeningly light caress. Goose bumps spread from her back to her breasts in a slow, sweet rush that heated her skin another few degrees and made her heart pound.
Oh, boy. Definitely dangerous.
They were practically making love while vertical. Joshua brushed his mouth across her forehead and Jessie felt dizzy with longing. She struggled to find a topic of conversation to keep herself sensible. “Noble’s was the first commercial interior design job I ever did on my own. I’d never done any commercial work until Con convinced Charlie to let me do—”
She glanced up while she was speaking. Why did he have to look at her like that? She licked her bottom lip, losing her train of thought.
Joshua’s eyes smoldered; he drew her closer. “You did a superb job.” He caught her nipple between the backs of two fingers and exerted gentle pressure. Moisture pooled between her thighs and her eyes glazed.
Her skin felt overly sensitive, almost electrified. Get a grip, Jessie. “How would you know? You haven’t even looked.” She managed a smile, and covered his eyes with her hand. She was demonstrative by nature and didn’t give the impulsive act a moment’s thought. But touching his bare skin, no matter what part of his body, was a mistake. A huge mistake.
“Tell me what you like about it.” Her voice sounded strangled. Joshua’s hot breath fanned the edge of her palm, his hips moved in a lazy, age-old rhythm that was making her insane, and his tweaking fingers had her libido at fever pitch. Jessie shifted slightly and rested her elbow high on his shoulder, feeling the play of muscles and the tantalizing brush of his hair on her overly sensitized skin as they swayed to the music. When had their feet stopped moving?
“I like the plaid carpet. And the mahogany paneling, the subtle lighting on the seascapes.” He was very observant. The thought gave her a chill. Watch yourself, Jessie. “And the brass lighting and the dance floor.” She felt his eyes move beneath her fingers.
“Lord,” he said roughly, nuzzling her temple. “You smell like sin.”
She withdrew her tingling palm and vowed to keep her hands to herself from now on. His lips skimmed her cheek.
“Would you make those sweet little moans for me in bed, Jessie? Would you whimper?” His teeth teased the shell of her ear. “You’d be hot and so sweet.” He paused, breathing as raggedly as she, and when he spoke again his words were a fragmented whisper against her cheek. “Do you lie in bed at night and wonder how you’d move beneath me? How incredible it would feel to have me deep inside you?”
The picture came to her in vivid Technicolor and her mouth went dry. She gave him a cool look. “Actually…no.”
“Liar.” His pale eyes looked as hot as lava. “I can see how much you want me. I can see your heart pounding.” He used the tips of two fingers to measure the pulse at her throat. “Right here.” He dropped his hand, satisfied as her pulse throbbed even harder.
“I don’t like the way I behave around you, Jessie Adams. It’s completely out of character and I don’t like it at all.” He said it like a caress. Like a curse.
She smiled, but inside a frightened little voice silently echoed his sentiment. “I thought I made you hot.”
“Oh, you do. Make no mistake about that.” A muscle jerked in his jaw. “Hell, right now I wouldn’t give a damn if half the press corps sat at the next table. That’s how much I want you.”
His face was just inches away; she could see herself reflected in his eyes. Jessie dug her short nails into her palms until she regained her senses.
“Wow,” she said dulcetly. “That much?” She’d observed men play the game of “I want you until I have you” all her life. “Then it’s a good thing we’re in a public place.”
“Which is why I’m not stripping your clothes off.” His brows drew together in a frown. “As a rule, I’m a patient man. Congratulations, you’ve managed to try that patience to the limit.” His fingertips ran along her jaw and left a trail of heat in their wake. His thumb glided over her lower lip.
“You and I have different priorities, Joshua.” She struggled to control her own libido. “Satisfying your expectations is on the very bottom of my list. I happen to have a life of my own and you’re only a very small part of it.”
“That’s going to change, Jessie. Very soon I’m going to be a major part of it.”
His arrogance and self-confidence were bred to the bone. “Don’t be too optimistic, Mr. Falcon. This is our first date and I don’t like having a man tell me what to do, or when to do it.”
His gaze rested on her mouth before he looked her right in the eye. “Are you telling me we won’t become lovers?”
“I haven’t decided one way or the other—yet.” She ignored the little thrill of excitement skimming her nerves. She fought the unwelcome, insidious attraction with a reminder it was a physical ailment, like a cold or the flu, and would pass.
“You’ll be the second person to know once I make up my mind.” She glanced at the table where the wait staff hovered. “Oh, our dinner’s arrived.” Her hand slid down his arm and caught his as they returned to the table.
Joshua sat down and flicked his napkin onto his lap with controlled irritation. “Are you always this stubborn?”
“Let’s say I’m extremely selective. I don’t jump into bed at the drop of a hat. And, frankly, the thought of tossing my underwear into your collection is something I have to think about.”
“Will I see you tomorrow?” he bit out, his expression savage. Desire dilated his eyes. Clearly part of him loved the challenge; the rest of him wanted her. Now.
Please God, next Wednesday was the next and last time she planned to see him. She’d see how Mr. Impatience liked waiting another week. She groaned inwardly. At the rate she was going, he might become a vapor trail before tonight was over.
“Let’s see if we manage to complete this evening unscathed first, shall we?”
Amusement flared in his eyes. Jessie was afraid he knew exactly what she was experiencing. He leaned back in the booth, his expression bland as his hot gaze raked her face. “We’ll see just which of us raises the white flag first then, shall we?”
Jessie relaxed the tense muscles gripping her spine. She didn’t even own a white flag. He had no idea just how stubborn and determined she could be.
Neither of them was getting any sex tonight, she reminded herself. After dinner she would drive herself home. Alone. It made a world of difference to her nerves when she leveled the playing field. The balance of power was in her hands tonight.
He might wonder.
But she knew.
THE SUN SHONE BRIGHT as a spring day, but there was still a nip in the air as Joshua strolled beside Jessie at the antique street fair one Sunday afternoon. She wore blue jeans that did marvelous things to her long legs and heart-shaped butt, a short, screaming orange sweater, and a brightly patterned silk scarf. The outfit was so Jessie, as he was finding out. She hadn’t worn the bold colors to attract attention, Joshua knew, although several men had turned to look at her. Jessie loved bright colors. Happy colors she’d informed him, eyeing his tan slacks, pale-blue shirt and navy windbreaker with disfavor when he’d met her downtown earlier.
The streets were crowded and noisy. Not the kind of place he’d ever have chosen to spend a Sunday afternoon. And certainly not where he would have chosen to be with Jessie. He preferred his surroundings slick, modern and new. And he wanted this woman to himself. Preferably in his big, black lacquered bed.
An unexpected business trip had kept him out of the country and he hadn’t seen her in a week. Her face had come to mind at the most inappropriate times. It annoyed the hell out of him.
Jessie paused beside a table laden with junk. She ran her hands over chipped cups and tarnished silver, all the while chatting comfortably with the vendor, an older woman with improbably red hair and a tired face.
Joshua admired the way the sun tangled in Jessie’s dark hair, and the sweet curve of her cheek and mouth as she spoke. She talked with her hands, too. Animated, alive, interested in strangers. He felt a pang he grudgingly admitted was jealousy.
He wanted her to himself. Yet each time he saw her he became more intrigued by her interaction with others. She put people at ease. The things that drew him to her were the same traits that drew other people. Jessie’s obvious joy for life, her enthusiasm, her sheer pleasure in everyday things. He glanced at the elderly lady’s face as Jessie asked about a particular item on the overcrowded table.
The woman was brought to life by Jessie’s animation, by her interest. It wouldn’t have surprised him if she gave Jessie anything she wanted from her table of wares.
“She expected you to bargain, you know.” Joshua told her as they strolled away with Jessie’s purchase, a beaten-up, tarnished teapot for which she’d paid the asking price. A ridiculous amount for a piece of junk.
Jessie cradled her purchase to her chest. “She’s raising her two grandchildren. Oh, look at that!” She grabbed his hand, dragging him through the crowd to look at a sideboard on the opposite sidewalk.
Joshua looked at their clasped hands. Her skin looked pale and soft, her hand small. He liked the feel of it in his. He liked the joining. And he wanted her more than his next breath.
Not just the wanting sexually. Although, God only knew, he urgently wanted her naked beneath him. But he wanted some of her joy, some of her zest for life.
He didn’t ever remember having Jessie’s…zing, for want of a better word. She crackled with energy. Was gloriously, unabashedly alive.
“What?” She glanced up to find him staring at her.
The milling crow faded as Joshua bracketed her face between his hands and brought his mouth down on hers. Her lips felt smooth and soft beneath his. He eased his tongue into the warm wetness of her mouth. She tasted of the caramel corn she’d eaten earlier. He’d never cared for the flavor before, but, on Jessie, the too sweet flavor tasted like ambrosia.
He stroked down her back and held her lithe body against him in an agony of want. The sun shone brightly on Joshua’s closed lids, bathing him in gold. I’ve lost it. We’re in the middle of the street for heaven’s sake! Surrounded by hundreds of people— A magnitude-ten shudder traveled from his face to his groin when Jessie used both hands to hold his head steady, then lightly stroked his cheeks with her thumbs as he kissed her. Her agile tongue played with his, darting and playing tag until Joshua felt weak and stupid with desire.
Once. That’s all he’d need. One time in Jessie’s bed. One time in Jessie. Surely to God that was all that was required to get her out of his system. Jessie Adams was just too much hard work. He was used to picking up the phone and having his woman available immediately. With Jessie he had to watch the ball.
Her tongue slipped from his mouth, and an ache of disappointment pressed against his chest. No. His arms tightened about her slender waist. But his Jessie wasn’t done with the kiss, after all. She brushed her damp lips across his, once, twice, then nipped his lower lips between strong, white teeth, and all the while her soft hands stroked his face.
Joshua had never experienced anything like it. Hell, he’d been horny before. He’d been turned on before. Sex was fine. Gratifying. A stress reliever. But with Jessie he wanted… What? More? Joshua went hazy for a moment as Jessie’s body shifted against him.
She was dangerous…lethal. Damn it, he didn’t do commitment. He wanted her to be the same as other women he’d dated and slept with. He needed her to be just like them. He wouldn’t have it any other way.
She finally pulled her mouth away. “We’re going to be arrested if we don’t stop.”
Joshua looked at her through dazed eyes. “What?”
Jessie smiled, her mouth blush-pink, damp and swollen from his kisses. Her unruly hair flew about in the warm spring breeze, strands stuck on the front of his sweater. Bonding them.
Joshua took a step back and stuffed his hands in the front pockets of his Armani slacks. “I don’t do public displays of affection.”
“Really?” Jessie’s brown eyes danced. “I’ll have to remember that the next time you grab me for a kiss in public.”
ANOTHER DINNER DATE. Joshua vowed he wouldn’t see this woman anywhere dangerous. Like a street fair. Or a parking lot. Or standing beside her car outside the theater in broad daylight.
There was something wrong with him, Joshua knew. He was incapable of feeling true emotion. Oh, he could fool most people, and he was quite proud of his ability to project the illusion. But the reality was he didn’t experience emotional highs or lows like other people. He had some sort of missing gene.
He could claim it was because unemotional, uncaring parents had raised him. But he was an adult now, capable of seeing their selfishness for what it really was. No, the failing was his and his alone. It just wasn’t in him to have any depth of feeling. It wasn’t a problem. He’d managed perfectly well without it for thirty-three years.
It was easier to move on and not linger when he had an affair. No one got hurt. He was upfront and always told the woman that he had no intention of getting involved. Hell, fact was, he couldn’t get involved. It just wasn’t in him. It was always her choice if she decided to stay or go. He never admitted he didn’t have the emotional fortitude to sustain any kind of relationship.
Take it or leave it. This was who he was. The Glacier.
Joshua had coldly analyzed his obsessive attraction to and fear of being with Jessie. He didn’t want her to get close enough to see through him to his empty heart. He didn’t want her to know that what she saw was merely the shell of a man going through the motions. Like Pinocchio, he wanted to be a real boy. Unfortunately he had a wooden heart. If he had a heart at all.
Fortunately Jessie would never know just how much he relished basking in her joie de vivre.
“Are you angry because I went to Paris without you?” he asked, reigning in his thoughts. She’d been quiet all evening.
“A.” Jessie broke a small loaf of sourdough bread and absently handed him a chunk. “I’m far too busy to go gallivanting off to Europe at the drop of a hat. B, I wouldn’t have gone even if you’d asked me.”
“Then why are you so annoyed?”
Her brown eyes were so dark they were almost black as she gave him a waspish glare. “You were gone for ten days.”
Joshua bit back a satisfied smile. “Not a lifetime, surely?”
There was a pregnant silence when she said, “I hate playing games,” and she suddenly looked frustratingly lost. Some of the heat left her eyes.
“You do it remarkably well,” he told her.
She stared up at him, her eyes huge. “I won’t sleep with you tonight.”
“A. I haven’t asked you to.” He smiled coldly. “And B, when we’re in bed, we won’t be sleeping.”
Jessie made a low growling sound. “The reason I agreed to meet you tonight was to tell you to go to h—” She paused to look up as a family settled themselves noisily at the table next to them.
“You were saying?” Joshua ground out over the child’s shrieks as its mother stuffed its flailing legs into the high chair their waiter had pulled up. “Jessica?”
She turned back, her expression dazed. “What?”
“You came here tonight to tell me to go…?” He knew damn well what the little shrew was going to say. He wanted to inform her he would go to hell after he had taken her to bed and made love to her until she couldn’t remember her name, let alone give him so much aggravation.
“To tell you…” She looked at him blankly, glanced back at the fussy baby, then in a split second recovered herself. She smiled. Lord, he had never seen anything more captivating than Jessie’s smile. “To tell you I missed you,” she said huskily.
The waiter must have been trained to wait for the most inconvenient moment. He chose right then to deliver their entrée, then fussed with salad and plates and refilled water glasses. Joshua sent him off with a glare.
Before he went to hell, before he was driven out of his mind, he was going to have to spend at least a week in bed with this infuriating woman. He didn’t like this sensation of not being quite in control. She smiled a sweet, gentle smile before picking up her fork.
Joshua had never experienced anything like this in his life. Not when two people’s desire for each other was so palpable. Jessie Adams was just as turned on by him as he was with her. And still she held him off.
Half of him was annoyed by her reticence. The other half admired her restraint. When they did finally have sex he’d better alert the fire department.
He glided his fingers up her thigh. Jessie shivered, then grabbed his hand and set it back on the table. For a split second, her eyes flashed. The child at the next table broke into a high-pitched babble capturing Jessie’s attention again for a moment. When she looked back at him she gave him a dulcet glance and picked up her water glass. Her cheeks were flushed.
She laid her napkin on her lap. A fraction of a second later, her eyes met his, a warm, soft smile touched the corners of her lips. A jolt of pure desire sizzled through him.
His heartbeat sped up as he said gruffly, “I want you very much, darling, so if you don’t stop looking at me like that—”
She laughed, that deep, throaty, sexy-as-hell laugh of hers. A couple of heads turned, people smiling reflexively with her. “Behave,” she told him sternly.
Her mouth, pale and free of lipstick, tempted him beyond endurance. Damn her. “Impossible. You wore that red dress expressly to make me crazy. It did its job. Now you have to pay up.”
He leaned forward for a brief taste of her smile, slanting his mouth over hers briefly. He felt the quick, unexpected flick of her tongue. Perhaps he’d better place busy restaurants on his dangerous locations list. Electricity shot through him and he jerked away from her potency. After a quick glance his way and a raised eyebrow, Jessie resumed eating.
Joshua enjoyed the delicate greed with which she consumed her meal. A silky strand of hair trailed down her shoulder. He was sorely tempted to pull out the rest of the pins and see how it would look tangled after their lovemaking. He grew harder just at the thought.
“Tell me about Paris,” Jessie demanded, leaning forward. “What you like about it. What you hate. What does the city smell like? Did you walk along the Seine in the rain? What’s the food like?”
Joshua laughed at her outpouring of questions. So Jessie. Having her focus her entire attention on him was intoxicating. In the flickering candlelight, her skin looked translucent and incredibly soft. Her long, elegant legs were hidden beneath the table, but he could feel the erotic brush of her foot against his calf.
Once the honeymoon part of the relationship ended, he wouldn’t have to invest as much time and energy into getting her into bed any time he wanted her. He didn’t like wasting the time thinking about sleeping with her. He wanted to do it, and then go back to concentrating on Falcon International.
He bought failing businesses, put a competent manager in place, and when the business was once again in the black, sold it off. Much like not having the emotional fortitude to bond with a woman, he didn’t form emotional attachments to the companies he purchased either. Everything about his life was controlled, planned and had a finite ending.
An ending of his own choosing.
It had been years since he had taken the time to slowly seduce a woman. It had been even longer since he had wanted a woman as much as he wanted Jessie. In fact, when he thought about it, he couldn’t remember ever wanting another woman as much as he wanted Jessie. Nor could he remember one who actually listened without trying to impress him—which might explain his excruciating patience.
And the fact that he was still around. And very aroused.
Over the past several weeks, and mostly during transatlantic phone calls, he’d discovered they had many things in common: old movies, Japanese and Italian food and skiing. Joshua had no interest in skydiving, bungee jumping or spelunking. Jessie’s love of dangerous sports appalled him. Not sure why, but wanting to understand this complicated woman better, he brought the topic up again.
“I don’t get the fascination,” he finally said, after she’d told him about a recent rock-climbing excursion. “What is it about the danger that turns you on?” Her skin looked soft, the bones in her slender hands almost fragile. He refrained from touching her. He wasn’t a hand holder. Had never even thought about it before. He frowned. Even the idea of just holding this woman’s hand had appeal.
“Everything.” Her eyes looked mysteriously dark in the shimmering light. Her gaze skittered to the table next to them and back. The toddler was banging a spoon on the high chair tray.
“I suspect it’s the same surge of adrenaline you get when you…when, you know, you’re going to attempt a merger. That heady rush that tells you you’re alive. That feeling of power can’t be duplicated. I feel invincible….” She shrugged one slender shoulder. “It’s hard to explain. Why don’t you come with me the next time I go?” She gave him that mysteriously limpid look he couldn’t fathom.
“Thanks,” Joshua said dryly, picking up his wineglass and taking a sip. “I’ll stick to mergers and acquisitions. At least I won’t have any broken bones.”
“Luckily, I haven’t had any of those. Believe me, I’m not into physical pain. Just the rush.”
“I don’t like you doing anything that has the distinct possibility of leaving you dead or paralyzed.” He didn’t like the thought a lot, he thought scowling.
“I’m always careful.” She viewed his concern with a strange expression in her dark eyes. “I’ve never had anyone worry about me before.” Her lips curved in a poignant smile for a moment before she looked down at her lasagna, then back to meet his eyes. “I’ll probably stop soon anyway.” Something flickered behind those fathomless brown eyes again, then was gone.
“Somehow I doubt anyone could make you do something you didn’t want to do.” His tone was dry.
She picked up her wineglass. “With the right incentive—” she toasted him “—you’d be surprised.”
“I LOATHE THAT MAN!” Jessie slammed the kitchen door at the main house and stormed into Conrad and Archie’s family room.
Conrad hid a grin. “Another amicable dinner date?” He folded his newspaper on his lap.
“Grrr.” Jessie started pacing. “This isn’t in the least bit funny, you know. I’ve missed out a gazillion times because he keeps going on these blasted business trips. Damn it. I’m starting to like him!” Jessie flopped down in an easy chair cradling a cushion on her lap. “I don’t want to like the blasted man. Don’t look at me like that, Archie. I don’t!” She grimaced. “At this rate I’ll be old enough to be my baby’s grandmother before we do it.”
Archie hid his grin behind his book. Conrad managed to look mildly interested by keeping his expression bland. “Good Lord,” he said, tongue-in-cheek. “Sounds like you might have to have a relationship before you fall into bed with each other. How novel.”
Jessie stuck out her tongue at him. “How droll.” She kicked off her shoes and pulled her legs under her. “Neither of us wants a relationship.” She said it as if it were the plague. “I just want him to be in the right place at the right time, damn it.”
3
THE LAZY DRIFT of fog gave an otherwordly charm to Pier 39, a picturesque tourist mecca of shops and restaurants down on Fisherman’s Wharf. Jessie tucked her hand into the crook of Joshua’s elbow and matched her stride to his. Moisture speckled Jessie’s dark hair like liquid diamonds. Their footsteps echoed on the wooden boardwalk as they strolled companionably between tubs of brilliant early-flowering spring perennials and the inevitable camera-toting tourists.
Jessie tugged on Joshua’s hand. “Come on. I want to go and see the seals.”
She leaned over the railing to get a better look as the animals lolled about on custom-made platforms in the water. “Cute, huh?”
Joshua chuckled. “Yeah, really cute.” He turned up the collar of her scarlet wool coat, his hands warm on her icy neck. “You’re freezing.” He tugged off the soft, warm scarf about his own neck and wrapped Jessie in it up to her eyebrows. She giggled. “How about a couple of gallons of hot coffee?”
“And pie?”
“And pie.”
They walked quickly, and found a small coffee shop down a little jog in the boardwalk. The restaurant smelled warm and yeasty and was almost empty. They selected a tiny, rickety round table with a view of the boats ferrying tourists out to Alcatraz Island and ordered their coffee before removing their coats.
“There are only about thirty choices. We could always order a slice of each,” Joshua suggested politely as Jessie scanned the menu for the pie selections. She stuck out her tongue at him.
Joshua’s eyes darkened. “I can think of more productive things to do with that.”
“Wicked man.” She turned to smile up at the kid who’d come to deliver their coffee and take their order. The young man almost stumbled into their table. Joshua sighed. Jessie had that affect on men of all ages.
Pie ordered, coats removed and coffee doctored, they lazily discussed the art show they’d seen together the week before, Joshua’s recent trip to Japan, and a large commission Jessie had just started, a bed-and-breakfast in Marin.
The waiter delivered their order and faded away. Jessie picked up her fork, and then put it down again. She pressed a hand to her midriff.
“I’m terrified I’m going to let Conrad down.” Absentmindedly, she began to tear a paper napkin into shreds. “The people who own the B-and-B also own a small vineyard in Napa. They’re influential, and there’s a good chance they’ll send a lot of business Con’s way if I do a good job.” She fiddled with the strips of napkin she’d torn.
“I’ve seen your work, Jessie. You’re a fine designer. They’re lucky to have you.”
Her cheeks pinked. “Really?”
“Really. But if worry is preventing you from sampling the delights of that lemon meringue p—”
“Oh, no you don’t.” Jessie pulled her plate closer and picked up her fork again.
She glanced up and, smiling, offered him a bite. He closed his lips around the tines of her fork. She was going to be under him tonight. She was going to feel the fires he’d been keeping banked explode into a fury of passion that was going to leave them both too weak to move.
“Thanks for sharing that with me.” He was so turned on he felt feverish. He’d been on a slow boil for months. “I can see how much you enjoy your food. You consume enough for a linebacker and look like a nymph. God, where do you put it all?” His eyes traveled down her slender body to rest for a moment on her small breasts.
“Well, obviously not there!” Jessie blushed. “Look at the baby seals or something. I can’t eat when you’re staring at me like a lion about to devour his Bambi du jour.”
“Hmm. Soft, succulent and tender pink.”
Jessie rolled her eyes. Joshua calculated they’d be out in the cold another hour at the most. He had an excellent bottle of Cristal chilling at home. He regrouped. “Tell me how adorable you were as a child.”
“I wasn’t an adorable child at all. I was a homely, gangly child.” She smiled. “Which made it tough to make friends. My mother and I moved constantly. We’d move from apartment to apartment, town to town, sometimes state to state, so I was always being shoved into a new school.”
“Military?”
“Collection agencies,” Jessie said dryly.
He frowned. “You were poor.”
“I suppose so, although I didn’t think about it at the time. Things were how they were.”
“When did you start this love affair with food?” He couldn’t wait to feel that avid little mouth all over him. Certainly, thinking of her sexually beat thinking of Jessie as being poor and wanting and having no one to care for her. For some reason picturing her that way pissed him off and made him feel…uncomfortable, damn it.
“Oh, way back. I learned to cook when I was six or seven because it was the only way I got to eat. My mom tended to forget little details like that. At one apartment, we had a wonderful Italian neighbor, sometimes she’d let me sit and watch as she prepared the family’s evening meals. The stairwells used to smell incredible.” She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. “Garlic. Tomatoes. Yum. Hot, homemade sourdough bread. I used to sit on the bottom step outside their door and salivate. Just the smell of garlic is enough to make me remember that apartment on Ninth.”
“God, Jessie.” He’d never imagined her as a child, just a sensual woman, born to be made love to.
She waved away his sympathy. “Oh, don’t feel sorry for me. Trust me, when I was a kid, it was all a wild adventure. I thought being hungry was normal. And I learned to make a mean spaghetti.”
“That’s child abuse.”
“My mom? No. She didn’t hurt me. She just—”
“Neglected you.” Christ, no wonder she ate as she did; there would never be enough food in the world to a little girl who was starving. It explained her insistence on always getting a doggie bag even in the finest restaurants.
“It was a bit more complicated than that.” Jessie paused and bit her lip. Her eyes met his. “My mom hooked on the side to make ends meet. There. I said it. Phew. As a teenager, I began to hate her for what she was doing. For how we were forced to live. Basically, I was a huge oops. She never knew who my father was.
“She died six years ago. I didn’t like or approve of her lifestyle, but I loved her.” She looked at him, her eyes unusually bleak. “In an odd way, now that she’s gone, I miss her. Family is important, Joshua. No matter what.”
“Family,” he repeated dispassionately, his eyes flat. “I thought mine was bad, but my life was a cakewalk compared to yours.”
“Tell me. You never talk about anyone but Simon and your cousin, Paul the Playboy.”
“Want another slice of pie?”
“Does the Pope wear a beanie?” She mouthed “Apple” to the waiter across the room, then turned back to fix Joshua in place with her chocolaty eyes. “Tell me all the Falcon family’s dirty little secrets.”
“Read the tabloids. They seem to have everything covered.”
“Poo, they make up stuff. Thanks,” she said as an aside to the waiter, who’d cut at least half the apple pie onto Jessie’s plate. She picked up her fork. “Unless the story about you having an alien’s love child is true?”
Joshua smiled. “I missed that one.”
“They had pictures,” Jessie mumbled around a mouthful of pie.
“Yeah?”
“Uh-huh.” She swallowed. “No family resemblance. Talk.”
I could’ve used someone in my life just like you, Jessie Adams. Looking back, it seemed now to Joshua that he’d always been cold, physically and emotionally. “I was pretty much brought up by the servants before I was shipped off to boarding school,” he said shortly, less comfortable when he was the one in the hot seat.
“Poor little rich boy.”
Joshua stared at her for a moment before shaking his head. “Not at all. I had everything I wanted.”
“Not quite. I bet you missed your mother.”
“I missed her when I was home. She was always off somewhere. No, what I wanted was a Lionel train,” he said, annoyed by her misinterpretation of his childhood. “What I got was a track that ran the perimeter of our thousand-acre estate with a train that required an engine driver and a full-time staff to keep it running. Not quite what I had in mind to take up to my room.
“Naturally I wanted what I perceived the ‘normal’ kids had. A yo-yo, or a blue Swiss Army knife, or the brown leather bomber jacket owned by one of the servant’s kids. Stupid. I could’ve bought a hundred of each out of my allowance. But perversely it just wasn’t the same. I finally figured out that none of that was the least bit important. I was well taken care of, had an exceptional education and learned, eventually, to relish hard work and responsibility instead of growing into a dilettante.”
“Oh, Joshua…”
“On the other hand, what I’d really like, right now, is for you to come home with me.”
Jessie smiled almost sadly. “Sorry, Romeo. Bad timing.”
“Damn.”
“You can say that again. How about another slice of pie?”
“WHEN’S THE NEXT DATE?” Archie asked her.
“Tonight. Listen, guys. Don’t romanticize this. It’s sex. Plain and simple.” Except it was getting more complex every time she saw him. She shook her head as Archie started refilling her cup. “None for me, thanks.” Jessie withdrew her palm from the rim of her cup then rose and rinsed it at the sink. Drying her hands, she said over her shoulder, “We’re going to Noble’s in the city. He said he has something special to celebrate tonight.”
“Valentine’s Day,” Archie said cheerfully.
“He’s going to get you into bed,” Conrad said morosely, running his fingers through his blond hair.
“No, he’s not,” Jessie said grimly, hanging the towel she’d just used on the rack. “He can huff and puff, but he won’t blow my house down.” Then she smiled. “Not for two weeks, that is. Won’t need to dig out the good underwear until then.”
“Better run out and buy some bad underwear,” Archie advised mischievously, giving her a wink.
Conrad walked over to Jessie and tilted her chin up. “Don’t for a moment think The Glacier is going to make an honest woman of you. It isn’t going to happen. You know it, we know it, and you can bet your sweet patoot the thought hasn’t crossed his mind. I doubt the guy has ever eaten meat loaf in his life.”
“In this case, I am an honest woman. I’m his wife. At least I am until I hand him the divorce papers. I don’t want, or need either of us to fall in love,” Jessie reminded him. “I just want my baby.” And to get out of this with my heart intact.
“Then I’d suggest, love,” Conrad said softening his tone, “that instead of buying undies, you go back home and reread Falcon’s press clippings before you take your temperature.”
JOSHUA GAVE HER pink diamonds for Valentine’s Day. He watched her reaction as they sat in a dim, candlelit booth at Nobel’s.
“Thank you so much, Joshua. These are beautiful. But I don’t want you buying gifts for me.” That unfathomable look came and went in her eyes.
“You don’t like earrings?” he asked sardonically, it was clear she was delighted with the way the pendants brushed her neck.
He’d begun to realize that every gift he gave Jessie was a test. She couldn’t possibly pass every one. Couldn’t possibly be so genuinely pleased every time. No one was that good. He needed to bring what he was starting to feel when he was with her back down to a manageable level.
“I love earrings, the bigger, the better. And these are absolutely gorgeous.” She touched a finger to one large pink drop. “What are these stones?”
“Diamonds.”
Jessie flushed and he felt a need to taste the heat. He imagined warming his mouth against the fire in her cheeks.
“I mean the big pink stones.”
“Diamonds,” he repeated.
“Diamonds.” Jessie went pale. “Oh, my God. Joshua! They must be…they’re huge.”
“Five carats.” The receipt had been left in the bottom of the box, as he always instructed his secretary to do. He’d probably see them once more before they got “lost.”
“Please, I love them, but I can’t accept them.” She yanked one off her ear with enough force to bruise. “I adore big, flashy costume jewelry. I’d be paranoid I’d lose these.” She placed the earring on the table between them as if it would shatter.
Joshua picked it up and reinserted the post in her earlobe. After affixing the earring back, he stilled her other hand. “Keep them. They’re insured.” Conversation closed.
He felt the warmth of her thigh beside him on the banquet seat. She’d swept her hair up off her neck into a sexy chignon that defied gravity. The pink diamonds glinted in the soft lighting, casting rainbow prisms on her smooth cheeks. Candlelight danced in her eyes as she watched several couples moving slowly around the pocket-size dance floor. The pink jacket she wore rustled as she turned inquiring eyes up to his.
“Don’t even ask,” he murmured huskily, his breath making a curly tendril of hair dance against her cheek. He had no intention of dancing with her again until he had satiated himself with her body in bed. He was a ticking bomb as it was. “Hell, if I held you that close right now, I’d take you on the floor. Hard and fast.”
She smiled that annoying as hell little enigmatic smile of hers. The one that turned the neurons in his brain to live wires and prepared his muscles for action.
“I want you,” he murmured. “Right now.” He restrained her fingers as she tried to pull away. “You’ve been holding me off far longer than I’ve ever waited for a woman.”
The soft candlelight flickered on her face, bathing it in an apricot glow that made her dark eyes brilliant and drew his gaze to the sheen of wine on her mouth. She ran the tip of her tongue across her bottom lip and Joshua suppressed a groan. She leaned forward, her elbows on the table. The movement made the neckline of her jacket gape just enough to reveal the soft upper curve of her breasts. He dragged his eyes upward with reluctance and she made a small, low sound deep in her throat.
“I think you must put that stuff in my food when I’m with you.” Her voice was so low he could barely hear her. “I’ve never felt like this in my life.”
Joshua cleared his throat. “What stuff?”
Jessie’s eyes were liquidly slumberous, and she blushed a velvety pink. “Spanish fly.”
Joshua thought he would explode. “Spanish fly is actually cantharides made from the skeletons of beetles.”
She grimaced.
Joshua held a laugh. “It causes itching all right, but not necessarily for sex.” If possible, her blush got deeper, and she gave a small embarrassed groan. His body vibrated with need. “What we both have is an overdose of good old-fashioned lust.” Then he lifted his glass. “To new beginnings.”
“To new beginnings.” Jessie clinked her glass against his, her smile brilliant before she blithely finished her shrimp.
Half her hair had escaped the pins, tangling with the heavy diamond drop earrings. Reaching out, he freed the silky filaments. His fingers lingered on her neck. “You know we’re going to be lovers, Jessie. God knows, I’ve been patient and waited long enough. I won’t wait any longer. I’m not a man who waits very long for anything. I need an answer.”
Jessie laid her hand on her purse, something she did often, almost as if it were a talisman. “You haven’t asked me a question.” She pushed the last bite of lemon meringue pie around her plate.
“I’m asking now.”
“I’m not sure what the question is.”
He pulled a folded document from his breast pocket, sliding it across the table. “I want you as my mistress, Jessie.” Joshua’s voice dropped another octave, his eyes kindling as he watched her mouth. He nudged the papers closer to her coffee cup.
Jessie eased her dry throat with a gulp of ice water. “What’s this?”
“A contract. A legal, binding agreement.” The sharp focus of his eyes reminded her of a bird of prey. “Read it.”
“I’d rather you gave me a brief summary.” Her hands balled into fists under the tablecloth. A contract! The bastard. And she’d been feeling guilty at how cold-bloodedly she was going about this.
“From now until the end of the year as my mistress,” he said baldly, “I pay your rent. Buy your clothes. In exchange, you give me exclusive rights for the duration.” Cut and dried. No mention of his fidelity.
She remembered Frankie, the fifteen-year-old who’d lived next door to them when she was thirteen. She’d had a huge crush on him. When she’d tried to steal a kiss, he’d called her a whore, like her mother. It had taken three other kids to pull her off him. She’d broken his nose and given him a black eye. She wondered how many people would be needed to pull her off Falcon.
“I’ll think about your offer.” She coolly pushed away her plate and reached for the leftover bread sticks. She filled her doggie bag then snapped two folds in the top to close it.
“You want me just as much as I want you.”
Yes. And if I’d slept with you months ago this wouldn’t hurt. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am about that.”
“Don’t apologize for wanting me, Jessie. You’re a sophisticated woman. You know the score. You want me and I, God knows, want you. You won’t be sorry. I can be a generous lover.” He tapped an earring with his finger. It grazed her neck and she felt the chill travel across her skin. “You won’t want for anything in my care.”
She took a calming breath. “You want me to sign a contract.” It wasn’t a question.
“What did you expect?” he asked, his face impassive. “A handshake and a gentleman’s agreement?”
Jessie’s laugh sounded brittle, even to her ears. “I can see why that wouldn’t work. Neither one of us is a gentleman.” She paused. “What happens after my time is up?” Her voice sounded oddly flat. “Do I just disappear, no questions asked, to that great graveyard for all your old mistresses?”
Joshua merely watched her. Suddenly angry—he was too damn cool!—Jessie shoved the papers back across the table. “I hate to be the one to disillusion you, Joshua, but not every woman finds you irresistible. I thought I could do this but, no, thank you.”
This was too impersonal, too calculating. She’d thought she could handle this part of it, but she’d been wrong. Dangerously wrong. A little late in the day, Jessie, she taunted herself.
“I want more than this. I deserve more than this.”
“Ten thousand a month.”
“W-what!”
“Ten thousand a month, tax free. An apartment and your clothes. And a car.”
Jessie gritted her teeth. “I wasn’t talking about mon—”
“Twelve thousand. And that’s my final offer.”
Black dots blurred Jessie’s vision. “You can take those papers and shove them—”
Grabbing her purse and paper bag, she stood. Joshua gripped her wrist tightly as she tried to sweep past him. With his other hand, he picked up the contract. “Take this. Read it. I’ll give you two weeks to decide.”
Jessie stared down at him, her breathing erratic. “One of my best qualities,” she said frigidly as she tugged her hand away, “is that I make up my mind quickly. You’re a self-righteous bastard, and I’m immeasurably grateful that I didn’t fall into bed with you. You’re a cold, arrogant—” her breath came out in a rush, her heart pounding so fast she thought she might faint “—jerk,” she finished.
She had to get out of here. Now. Her cold hands took the papers from him, folding and then refolding them. Then she twisted them into a tight tube. “Here.” She shoved them against his chest. “Try this for size!”
The contract slowly unfurled and dropped to his lap. His fingers tightened painfully on her wrist. “Jessie…”
She shook off his hand, removed the earrings, laid them carefully next to his coffee cup, then walked swiftly out of the restaurant.
BLAST THE MAN. Couldn’t he do anything right! On each of her fertile days in January he’d been out of town. In February, he’d been gone at the wrong time again. In a couple more weeks all systems would’ve been go. With any luck, they would’ve been in the same place at the same time.
Instead he had to go and irritate her so darn much she’d almost punched his arrogant nose. Jessie wanted to throw up her hands in disgust.
She turned into her driveway. This was a case of “be careful what you ask for.” And, God, had she asked for this. An icy wind rattled the car. Jessie laid her arms across the top of the steering wheel and stared sightlessly at her cottage. The ache in her chest made her lay her forehead down and squeeze her eyes shut.
She had been so close. So damn close. Tears of frustration and disappointment seeped between her eyelids. She slammed her fist down on the steering wheel. “I want my baby.” Her voice broke and she pounded the wheel again. “You promised me my heart’s desire. You owe me my baby, damn you.”
She lifted her head and stared at the dark, swaying treetops beside her cottage. Joshua Falcon approached a personal relationship exactly as he did a business merger. Why had she been surprised? For him, they were one and the same.
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