Married For The Boss's Baby
Susan Carlisle
An unexpected baby…When successful surgeon Grant Smythe’s baby half-sister is orphaned, unlike his own father, Grant is determined to be there for little Lily.A convenient proposal…But a challenge for custody means Grant needs a wife too! New nanny Sara Marcum is the ideal candidate…A forever wife?It might be temporary, but soon warm-hearted Sara completes more than just Grant’s family. Can he convince his bride-for-now to become his forever wife?
He saw her. “Hey.”
“Hi, there.”
“You want to join us?”
A ripple of uncertainty went through her. She shook her head. “I don’t think so.”
He opened one arm wide and said, “Aw, come on. You never know. It might be fun.”
She wanted to. What would it hurt if she did? Ignoring her fear, she stepped into his arm and he lightly wrapped it around her waist. One of her hands went to his forearm and the other rested on Lily’s back. Could she ever have a moment like this in her life? Her child. Her family.
Just a crazy dream. Don’t get caught in the trap of thinking it would be a marriage for real.
They shifted in a small circle.
Being this close to Grant was heady. His deep hum filled the room as he smoothly moved round the floor. He smelled slightly of Betadine, which was so much a part of his profession. She didn’t find it offensive. It just reminded her that his business was to save lives.
She looked up to find Grant’s rich coffee gaze on her. There was a question there. A desire. Her heart thumped hard but she managed a smile. His head lowered. Her breath caught. He stopped as if awaiting her permission. Her lips parted. Grant’s mouth moved closer. Time slowed. Lily cooed between them, her head resting on his shoulder. Sara silently begged for his touch. He no longer shifted his feet. Finally his lips found hers.
His mouth was firm. Warm. She rose on her toes. His lips slanted over hers, finding a more perfect fit. He pulled her tighter against him. Then pressed his mouth more determinedly against hers. She’d been kissed before, but not so that she shivered and burned at the same time.
Dear Reader (#ulink_c63cceb9-8330-5ea4-aed9-e7e6421bcebe),
An author is often asked, ‘Where do you get your ideas?’ For this book the idea came while I was watching a TV show. I was paying particularly close attention to the dynamics between a father and a son. I asked myself, What if …? Up popped a seed of an idea that became Grant and Sara’s story.
Sometimes life gives you a surprise—even a much unappreciated one. You just have to deal with it. That is exactly what happens to Grant and Sara in this book. Little do they know that each of them is the answer to the other’s problem. It requires a journey of discovery for them to find where they belong.
I hope you enjoy Grant and Sara’s happily-ever-after as much as I do. I’d love to hear from you. You can find me at susancarlisle.com (http://susancarlisle.com).
Susan
Married for the Boss’s Baby
Susan Carlisle
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
SUSAN CARLISLE’S love affair with books began in the sixth grade, when she made a bad grade in mathematics. Not allowed to watch TV until she’d brought the grade up, Susan filled her time with books. She turned her love of reading into a passion for writing, and now has over ten medical romances published through Mills … Boon. She writes about hot, sexy docs and the strong women who captivate them. Visit susancarlisle.com (http://susancarlisle.com).
To Anna,
I’m glad to call you daughter-in-law.
Praise for Susan Carlisle (#ulink_8ca89162-bc0a-5e30-83e2-d5417982ccd0)
‘Gripping, stirring, and emotionally touching … A perfect medical read!’
—Goodreads on His Best Friend’s Baby
‘This emotional love story kept me riveted. A truly satisfying, emotional read. Susan Carlisle’s work is like that. Check it out, you won’t be disappointed.’
—Goodreads on NYC Angels: The Wallflower’s Secret
Contents
Cover (#udcda3a7d-3551-5793-b1dc-014af55f9557)
Introduction (#u02289d14-f879-525e-b6d8-d093720a2b40)
Dear Reader (#u43489b0f-19aa-5d1f-acf5-d8265bbe48e5)
Title Page (#u3e721669-24ab-59a3-8109-875730ef37b6)
About the Author (#u03be2b85-4910-5512-8908-4e0fdfae4b37)
Dedication (#u4ca857a2-fb60-5383-b19c-ae3c889bea0f)
Praise for Susan Carlisle (#u6945553a-6f68-5d6a-8706-e8e51dc84767)
CHAPTER ONE (#uf64ee18b-4f08-5b2e-8483-e7b3c34c2552)
CHAPTER TWO (#ub8b1587e-a2e1-5fe3-a137-46a4bdd4102f)
CHAPTER THREE (#u76a3bc01-623d-5410-9730-6e187af8582d)
CHAPTER FOUR (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER FIVE (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER SIX (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER SEVEN (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER EIGHT (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER NINE (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER TEN (#litres_trial_promo)
Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
CHAPTER ONE (#ulink_8b8a3020-784a-5519-b273-20e0fdad3092)
DR. GRANT SMYTHE glanced at the bassinet. His father and stepmother had been in the grave only a day and the nanny had quit. Just walked out. What else could go wrong?
No doubt his father was rolling over in his grave at the idea that Grant had been awarded custody of his baby half-sister. He was pretty sure his father had had no intention of ever telling the child she had siblings.
Grant paced the oak planks in the foyer of what had been his father’s home.
Where is the new nanny? When is that woman going to show up?
He checked the time on his phone. She should be here by now. They were waiting on him in the OR. The liver he was to transplant wouldn’t be viable much longer.
The baby whimpered. Grant shoved his hair off his forehead. This was just one more of his father’s ways of making him feel inadequate. One final sick joke.
The whine grew to a cry. Where was...? What is her name...? Uh, Sydney, Sara, Sharon or something.
The baby released a deep-chested, high-pitched scream. What was wrong? He hadn’t had anything to do with babies since med school. Even then it had only been for a short time.
Baby. He was so bitter he couldn’t even call the small bundle by her name. Grant looked into the cherubic face twisting up to make another cry. His sister. Lily. He shouldn’t be taking out lifelong issues with his father on an innocent babe. “Lily,” he whispered.
Her mouth closed and she studied Grant.
Amazement filled him. The child was beautiful. She resembled Evelyn so much. Her mother. The same woman he’d once planned to marry. Lily could have been his daughter. At least that was until he had introduced Evelyn to his father. Those were dark thoughts Grant didn’t have time for.
The ring of his phone drew his attention. Surely that was the nanny saying she was on her way. Answering, he recognized the voice of Leon, his best friend and lawyer. When Grant had taken responsibility for Lily he’d contacted Leon to watch after his and the child’s interests.
Without any preamble Leon said, “Well, it looks like Evelyn’s family means business.”
“I had no idea she even had an aunt and uncle. She never said anything about them.”
“Doesn’t matter. They’re here now. Maybe you should consider letting them have Lily. What do you know about raising a child? Adoption could be the right way to go. We can set it up so that you oversee her trust fund.”
Grant still couldn’t get over the fact that a couple had showed up at the funeral saying they were his stepmother’s family members. The man had then informed Grant that they were planning to file for custody of Lily.
His sister. His family. She should be with him.
Why he felt so strongly about that he had no idea. Did he still think he needed to prove something to his father? That shouldn’t matter. He’d spent most of his adult life fighting with the man. He was gone now. A dejected feeling settled over Grant. No matter how bad it had been between them he still hated knowing his father was gone forever.
Grant look down at Lily. “What do we know about these people?”
“Based on a preliminary report of the Armsteads, they look like the perfect couple to take in a child.”
“And I’m not,” Grant snapped. “What about the lifestyle I can offer her?”
“To be quite frank, it won’t matter.”
“So what would make a difference?”
Leon sighed. “The court likes to see children going to a couple. If you were married it would help your case one hundred percent. You’re the closest relative. You have the means and ability to care for her. I don’t see a judge, even the most conservative one, going against you.”
“So what you’re telling me is that I need to find a wife,” Grant said flatly.
“In a word, yes.”
* * *
Sara Marcum still couldn’t believe she’d agreed to take this job. She pulled her beat-up car into the curved brick drive of a two-story mansion in Highland Park, the poshest section of Chicago, Illinois. The yard was so manicured each blade of grass stood at attention.
Kim, a nursing friend who worked at the hospital, had called her that evening and told her about Dr. Smythe’s desperate need for a nanny. Knowing Sara was available, she’d given her the doctor’s address and asked her to go there immediately. The problem was that Sara wasn’t nanny material. She wanted nothing to do with caring for a child.
“You have a big heart, Sara, you’re just the person to help this guy out,” Kim had insisted. “It’s just temporary and the money’s good.”
Currently between hospice nursing positions, Sara wasn’t sure she could return to doing that type of work. She had loved and hated her job. After Mr. Elliott, one of her favorite patients, had died painfully over many weeks it had become too much. When he’d passed away Sara had decided it was time for a change. She needed to get away to recover but couldn’t afford not to have any income. The need for her father and herself to eat and have a roof over their heads took priority. Which was the only reason she’d agreed to consider this nanny position.
Her cellphone rang as she drove up the drive. “Hey, Dad.”
“We’ve have a problem, little girl.” Sara had long since outgrown the nickname but her father continued to call her that.
“What’s wrong now?” She was so tired of fighting off creditors.
“Mr. Cutter just came by. He’s evicting us.”
She gripped the steering-wheel. “He’s what? He can’t do that!”
“Well, he is. He has someone who wants the apartment.”
“I told him I would get the rent caught up as soon as I could. I paid an entire month just a few weeks ago.” She wanted to scream. Would it ever end?
Growing up, she’d known her father had worked hard to make ends meet. After his accident, finances had become ever tighter. He now received disability but nothing else. The company had managed to see that he was blamed for the explosion and had awarded him no compensation. She’d wanted a nursing degree so badly she’d gone into debt to get it. It had taken her years but she had paid her loans off. Yet here she was, trying to survive again.
“I reminded him but he doesn’t care. He wants us out by the end of the week.”
Sara gave an exasperated sigh. She was tired of moving. Now she had to do it again. But to where?
They had been doing well. She’d had some savings and had even been starting to look into buying a house when her father had answered a telemarketing call. Lonely and at home by himself too much, he had been the perfect victim for a fast-talking salesmen to take advantage of. Before he’d been done, all of her father’s money had been invested in land in Florida that didn’t exist and most of hers was going to keeping her father’s doctor’s bills in check. Even with this job she would barely keep their financial heads above water.
“I’ve got to go, Dad. Don’t worry, I’ll figure something out.” But what? She rang off.
She pulled to a stop in front of the house. Before she had completely climbed out of the car a tall man holding a baby tightly to his chest was hovering over her. In his arms the child was but a tiny bundle. “What took you so long?”
Going motionless, Sara held his gaze for a moment. The baby cried out.
“Look, I’m sorry,” he said over the infant’s wailing. “They’re waiting on me in the OR. Can you please just come in?”
He rushed inside the house, leaving the door wide open. The baby’s bellows filled the air.
Unable to bear the little one’s distress, Sara slammed her car door and hastily followed them. She stopped in the hallway.
The man thrust the babe into her hands. “Will you please take her? I have to go.”
Sara grasped the baby with a growing knot in her throat. She’d told Kim she couldn’t do this. But she had insisted. Why did every child have to bring back the fear of getting too close? That horrible ache that never seemed to ease. Sara looked into the infant’s face. That was a mistake. “Go?”
“I’ll be back later,” Dr. Smythe announced. “Everything you should need...” he pointed toward the back of the house and up the large staircase “...is in the kitchen or upstairs in the nursery.”
“Dr. Smythe—”
“No time.” He picked up his keys from the table in the foyer and headed for the open door.
Sara hurried after him and called, “You can’t just leave.”
“Can’t talk right now.”
“I don’t care if I’m being evicted or not, you’re not paying me enough for you to just dump this child in my arms and leave! Come back here.”
“We’ll go over things later.” He was gone. The large door closed with a thump behind him.
Sara stood there in disbelief, looking down at the unhappy child in her arms. He’d handed the baby over with no thought. Nothing like her reaction when, as a surrogate mother, she’d given up a baby. If she’d have been able to, she would have hung on for dear life. But that hadn’t been the agreement. She still carried the pain. For her there was nothing cavalier about relinquishing a baby.
What had she gotten herself into? She’d known this wasn’t a good idea. But she was here now. Sighing, she had no choice but to see to the baby for the time being. Leaving the baby by itself wasn’t an option. Sara would never, ever do that. When the presumptuous doctor returned she would tell him that this arrangement wasn’t going to work. She would still need to figure out something for her and her father. Maybe she could make Mr. Cutter see reason. Working for Dr. Smythe wasn’t the answer.
Walking across the black-and-white-tiled floor, she entered the living area. It was the most un-child-friendly place she’d ever seen. With overstuffed white sofas and chairs sitting on plush white carpet, she could only hope there was never any red juice in this child’s life.
Heavens, she didn’t even know if the baby was a boy or a girl, much less its name. The infant let out another scream.
It must be time for a diaper change and a bottle. Then she would put the tyke down for the night. There must be a nursery somewhere but for now the kitchen would have to do. At least she could find some food for the child. If she focused on the practical, maybe she wouldn’t need to worry about the emotional part of working with a baby.
Sara gathered what looked like a diaper bag and headed down the wide main hall in search of the kitchen. It turned out to be a wide, spacious room with large windows overlooking a swimming pool. A small house sat beyond. The garden surrounding the area was green and immaculate, like the front lawn. If she had ever imagined a perfect kitchen, this would have been it. She’d heard of the Smythes and their status in the community but to live in this opulence was far beyond what she was used to. The baby whined. Sara jiggled it.
Dropping the diaper bag on a padded bar stool, she walked to the corner area of the room near the table. There she found an infant seat that could be set on the table. She strapped the baby in, leaving the bouncer on the floor while she hunted for formula. Not seeing any on the counter, she checked in the refrigerator. Inside were already prepared bottles. Setting one on the bar, she lifted the baby seat up and, after heating the bottle to the right temperature, started feeding the child.
The baby’s angry face turned angelic in its eagerness to eat. At least someone was happy. Something that simple tugged at Sara’s heart. What would it have been like to see Emily smile with this kind of pleasure? She had to forget that time. It was gone. But she couldn’t forget. Still clung to those precious days.
* * *
Grant stretched his arms out, waiting as the surgical tech slipped the green gown over his arms and went around him to tie it in the back. Had he lost his mind?
He knew nothing about babies. Hadn’t wanted to know anything about them. Now one had been plopped into his lap. More amazing was that he planned to fight to keep her.
Grant’s teen years hadn’t been easy between him and his father, but his parents’ divorce had made it even worse. His father had left his mother. The breakup had devastated her. She’d taken it so hard Grant had feared that she might be committed. With his parents divorced and his older brother living in a commune in California, all his mother’s care had fallen on Grant. Thankfully he had convinced her to get help. Now she was living in Florida and by all accounts doing well.
To strain the relationship further, his father had ended up marrying Evelyn, the girl Grant had been in love with. Even at thirty-two, being betrayed by them had been the final slap in the face Grant had been willing to take. Trust had been hard to regain. His interactions with his father and Evelyn had been few and far between over the last two years. His father had made an effort but Grant had been unable to forgive him. Learning that he and Evelyn had had a baby only disgusted him more.
“Dr. Smythe, they’re waiting for you in surgery,” another tech called.
Grant shouldered his way through the swinging OR doors and into the room. The patient, a middle aged man, already waited on the table. “Sorry I’m late,” Grant said to the room in general before asking the anesthesiologist, “John, is everything ready to go?”
“Patient is stable,” John answered.
Grant stepped up beside Jane, the woman who was dressed much as he was. She was just months away from finishing her training as a transplant surgeon. “Where’s the liver?”
“Thirty minutes out,” Jane answered.
He nodded. Looking at the patient, he could see Jane was already in the process of opening. “Good, then let’s get this patient ready to receive his new liver. He has a family waiting.”
Here in this OR Grant was in control, the best at what he did. He appreciated order. Outside, life was more difficult, unexpected. Now that his father and stepmother were gone, he had to admit to a tinge of guilt over his father dying with their relationship in shambles. When Grant had learned his father hadn’t updated his will after Lily’s birth he’d found it difficult to believe. With his brother unavailable, Grant had been the next in line to receive custody of Lily. He couldn’t let his newborn sister be taken by state services, could he? How would his father have felt about that? He didn’t want to give her up to Evelyn’s aunt and uncle either. This was one task he would demonstrate himself worthy of.
“Doctor, the organ is here.”
A man entered, carrying a cooler. The pace would pick up and Grant would have to apply all his energy to seeing that the bad liver was removed and the new one put into place. He wouldn’t have time to think about Lily.
With the blood vessels clamped off and the organ removed, Grant inspected the new one. “It looks good. Let’s get this done.” Gently he placed the liver into the cavity and began stitching the vessels to it. The phone of the OR wall rang. Grant continued to work.
“Dr. Smythe, it’s for you.”
His brow wrinkled. “Who is it?”
The nursed asked, then called, “It’s a woman who says she’s your nanny.”
“What the hell?” he murmured. Louder, he said, “I can’t speak to her right now.”
The nurse relayed the message. “She is being rather insistent.”
He huffed. “Jane,” he said to the fellow, “would you please check for bleeding and start closing while I get this?”
A soft mumble followed him to the phone. His colleagues must find the situation curious. It was out of character for him to take a call while in the OR. He had a good relationship with his team but he was also known for not tolerating interruptions during surgeries.
He resisted grabbing the phone out of the nurse’s hand. “This had better be good,” he growled into it. “I’m in the middle of surgery.”
There was silence on the other end. Finally a voice said, “It’s Sara Marcum. I’m sorry, I had no idea that they would put me through to the OR.”
That eased his aggravation a little. “Now that you have me, what do you need?”
“It’s late. Since we had no time to talk I wanted to know if I’m supposed to stay the night. I didn’t come prepared for that. I have a father who is expecting me home.”
Grant hadn’t thought of that as he’d rushed out of the house. He’d just assumed... “Yes, I am going to need you tonight. Every night. If you’ll please just make do for now, I promise tomorrow I’ll give you a full list of your responsibilities. I need to get back to my case.”
“I have responsibilities as well but I’ll be here with the baby until you come home.”
“Thank you.” He hung up the phone. What responsibilities? Could hers be more important than a baby or a lifesaving transplant? He paused for a second. Hadn’t she said something about being evicted? Maybe she had gigantic problems as well. He’d get this transplant patient taken care of first and then head for the house. Losing a nanny again wasn’t what he needed.
As he returned to the table his team gave him questioning looks over their masks. He shrugged. “I was given custody of a baby and have a new nanny. Now, can we get this patient closed and out to ICU?”
* * *
Sara hung up the phone. Dr. Smythe hadn’t been happy with her call but he’d left her no choice by leaving so abruptly. With an eviction on the horizon she needed the money this job would bring, but she wouldn’t allow anyone to treat her unprofessionally. He had almost done so by all but throwing the child at her and leaving.
It was time to find that nursery. Sara cradled the baby in her arms and, with the diaper bag slung over her shoulder, she climbed the wide circular staircase to the second floor. Going along the passageway, she searched each room for one that looked like a baby’s room. At the end of the hall, across from the master bedroom, she found a small slice of heaven.
The walls were painted the palest pink. She’d had a pink room growing up. It had been that color when her mother had left. When this little girl became old enough, would she think she had done something wrong to make her mother leave, as she herself had? She hoped not.
Above a snowy-colored crib draped in rosy colored netting was the name ‘Lily’ in white letters on the wall. Lily. Pretty name.
Sara had been in such a hurry on the phone she’d forgotten to ask Lily’s name. It was nice to have one to call her. Sara looked down into the big eyes watching her. The baby looked like a Lily. The disadvantage to knowing her name was that it was another step closer to giving them a personal connection. Knowing someone’s name made you care more, the very thing Sara wanted to guard against.
The regal room fit Lily perfectly. Moving across the thick carpet of a similar quality to what was downstairs, Sara placed the baby in the bed.
What had Dr. Smythe been thinking? Only about himself, handing his child over without so much as telling Sara her name?
The medical field was a small world and she’d heard talk about the young dynamic doctor who did surgery with skill and precision. Still, to give your baby to someone you didn’t know and rush off without concern spoke of self-centeredness, even neglect. Hadn’t her mother done something similar with her? Sara had grown up thinking she’d caused her to leave. No child should wonder something like that.
Locating the diaper stacker on the closed double doorknob, she had Lily changed in no time. Her job as a nursing aide during her school years had been teaching summer help how to change diapers. Back then she’d enjoyed working with babies. Now she usually steered clear of them.
Lifting Lily off the bed with her little limbs flailing, Sara went to the rocker next to a window that looked down over the garden. A large oak limb hung just outside. Every child should have such an idyllic place to live. Sara watched Lily as she placed the nipple of the warmed bottle to hungry lips.
For a brief time Sara would dedicate herself to meeting Lily’s physical needs. The emotional ones would be seen to by her father. Sara wouldn’t let herself get too close. She was well aware of how hard it was to pull away.
With Lily settled in her crib, Sara chose the bedroom nearest the nursery as hers for the night. It had been an exhausting day and she was soon asleep.
* * *
Grant returned to the house around midnight. The surgery had gone well and all he wanted was a soft bed and some sleep. He had spent the travel time out to Highland Park thinking about what he’d have to do to get permanent custody of Lily. Could he marry just to keep her? Some part of him hated the possibility of losing her while the other worried about making such a drastic decision. Was he the best choice to raise her? Would his father be pleased he was taking such an interest in Lily?
The one thing he did know was that he would do a better job than his father had done with him. Lily wouldn’t always feel as if she didn’t measure up or was unloved if she messed up. She would know she was supported, no matter what.
He’d been on a major adrenaline rush since his father had died. What if he was just making decisions based on sentiment instead of rational thought? Was he thinking he could make his dead father happy by taking care of Lily or was he doing it to get back at Evelyn for treating him the way she had?
It didn’t matter what his motive was, he wanted to keep Lily and if that meant taking a wife then he would do it. None of the women he’d dated recently or in the past would fit that position. Even if he could get one of them to agree. They would be more interested in their looks and spending his money than they would be in Lily.
Maybe Evelyn’s aunt and uncle were the answer. Lily could have a home, people who really wanted her. But he did too. Was he prepared to devote the next eighteen to twenty-two years of his life to someone other than himself? He thumped the steering wheel with the palm of his hand. Lily should be with him and he intended to fight to keep her, even if it meant he had to marry.
Grant pulled into one of the three bays of the carport in the back of the house. He unlocked and opened the door to the kitchen. Quiet greeted him. There was a light on under the counter. When was the last time someone had left one on in anticipation of his return?
He grabbed a glass from the cabinet and headed to the refrigerator. Taking out the milk, he was in the process of pouring it when the pixie-sized nanny burst into the kitchen, holding an umbrella as if she was prepared for a fight.
Grant jerked upright. Milk spilled across the granite countertop and streamed onto the floor. Grimacing at the mess, he snarled, “Hell, woman, you almost scared me to death.”
“How do you think I feel? Waking up in this hulking house to hear a door shut?”
“I told you I’d be home tonight.”
“After the way you left, I was supposed to believe you?”
Grant hung his head. He deserved that. His leaving had been rather abrupt. “I owe you an apology.” He looked at her. “I’m sorry.”
With large brown eyes, her shoulder-length hair in disarray around her face, she captured his attention. She wore the same T-shirt she’d had on earlier and jeans. Most women he knew wouldn’t have been caught dead without every hair in place. Not this one.
He cleared his throat. “Why don’t you have a seat and we’ll talk while I clean this mess up.”
“It’s late. Aren’t you tired?”
“Beat. But I don’t know if I can be counted on to be here in the morning.” He tried for one of his most charming smiles. “And I don’t want to take the chance that you might use that umbrella on me.”
She looked at the instrument, as if she’d forgotten she held it, then at him. “Okay, but just for a few minutes. Lily will be awake again soon.”
His father and Evelyn had named Lily after his paternal grandmother. Grant had once confided in Evelyn that he wanted to give the name to a daughter one day. He’d trusted her with that knowledge and she’d violated it. It was just another example of how she and his father had cared nothing about his feelings. He’d sworn he’d never trust that freely again. With every woman since Evelyn he’d been cautious about what he revealed about himself. If he didn’t let a woman get to know him too well then he didn’t have to worry about being hurt by her. Show no weakness.
That had been the problem with his father. He’d used it against him. Grant had wanted to impress him, wanted to do the right thing in his eyes, but nothing had seemed to please him. Grant had worked at it as a kid and even as an adult, hating himself for caring what his father thought but still trying to please. Maybe raising Lily was just one more way of proving he was good enough. Irony. The way to say I told you so. He was disgusted with himself. Even with his father gone, he was still trying to demonstrate himself worthy of being his son.
The nanny—he wished he could remember her name—had hung the umbrella on the back of a chair at the table and sat down. She had an expectant expression on her face.
Grant grabbed a dishrag and started mopping up the milk. What had she told him her name was over the phone? When Kim had called that afternoon he’d been looking for paper and pencil to write it down but Lily had started crying.
Tossing the rag in the sink, he dropped into the chair at the end of the table. “I’m sorry, I can’t for the life of me come up with your name.”
She raised a finely groomed eyebrow. “Let me get this right. You’re not even sure that I’m the person you were expecting? What if I had kidnapped Lily? You couldn’t even tell the police my name.” She leaned toward him, her voice rising with indignation. “I sure hope you show more concern for your patients.”
Okay, he deserved some of what she said but he was a fine doctor and refused to take that comment about his professionalism. “I’ll have you know that my patients take precedence with me.”
“Yeah, I don’t doubt that. I saw an example this afternoon.”
He’d walked into that one.
“Let me help you. I’m Sara Marcum. I’m here until you can hire a full-time nanny for Lily. For now she is fed, clean and sleeping upstairs.” She stood. “It’s late. I’m tired. We can continue this discussion in the morning. Good night.”
Sara straightened, making the thin shirt material cup her breasts. She wasn’t wearing a bra. Her nipples pushed against the fabric. Grant couldn’t help but stare.
She made a small sound of distaste and picked up the umbrella. For a second he was afraid that she might really use it on him but she headed out of the kitchen. The view of her backside was almost as inviting as her front. She had a high, firm butt that made her jeans more than just clothing.
Grant shook his head. He had patients to see about and Lily to situate, his father’s estate to settle, and now a smart-mouthed, take-charge nanny who was too cute for his own good.
Nope, that wasn’t a road he would be going down.
CHAPTER TWO (#ulink_08d0dd82-3bd9-5cf4-8060-2a988e66cb8f)
SARA WOKE FROM a deep sleep. It took her eyes a moment to adjust to the darkness and for her to register the low shriek of a baby. Slinging the covers back, she jumped out of bed.
How long had Lily been crying?
Sara wasn’t tuned into the child as her real mother would be. Would she have had that maternal bond with Emily? The question made her flinch. It couldn’t have existed in her own mother because it had been so easy for her to leave. She shook away the darks thoughts. Right now Lily needed her.
With no clothes but those she’d arrived in, she was sleeping in her T-shirt. Padding barefoot down the hall and into the nursery, she used the nightlight to see to scoop up Lily. Sara pulled the child against her chest in an effort to quiet her. Despite Sara’s annoyance over Dr. Smythe’s attitude, she did have compassion toward him regarding his rest. At two months, Lily wasn’t quite old enough to sleep through the night yet. She probably had a wet diaper and would soon settle down after her nighttime bottle.
Laying the child back in the crib, Sara gathered what she needed to change Lily. All the while the baby’s cries grew. She talked softly, trying to soothe her. Wasn’t that what a mother would do? Sara didn’t need to think that way. She was halfway back to the crib when a large male form filled the doorway. She groaned.
“Can’t you make her hush?” a deep sleepy voice grumbled. Grant stood there like a thundering god with his chest bare and boxers covering his slim hips.
“She has a wet diaper. I’m changing her.”
“Good. I have to be at the hospital early.” He turned to leave.
Sara couldn’t stop the words. “I don’t control when Lily wets herself.”
He blinked then pushed a wavy lock of brown hair off his face and took a step closer. “Hey, I’m sorry. I’m not being fair. Just do what you have to do. I don’t have the time or the inclination to look for anyone else to help me right now. Please try to ignore my sour attitude.”
That was more like it. “I’ll do what I can but we need to establish some ground rules.”
Sara wasn’t intimidated by type-A doctors. She wouldn’t be walked over by a self-important domineering doctor, or anyone else for that matter.
“I’ll check in at the hospital and then we’ll have that discussion. Will that be satisfactory?”
“That’ll be fine. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll take care of Lily.” She had started toward the baby’s bed again. “Oh, by the way...”
He stopped in mid-turn.
“I would appreciate it if you would put some clothes on around me.”
He glanced down. “I did.”
An O formed on her lips as he walked away.
* * *
Grant was dressed in his casual work clothes when he entered the kitchen to the sound of humming. Sara had Lily sitting in her baby seat on the table while she fed her. Lily seemed as enthralled with the nanny as she was with her.
Sara had made a smart comment about his dress last night. What had she expected from a man awoken out of a deep sleep? A tux? She’d had on that T-shirt that showed her full breasts to their best advantage and he hadn’t complained. She believed she had the moral high ground and he let her stay there while he enjoyed the view. The woman had something special about her that he couldn’t put a name to.
“Hello.”
Sara turned, a surprised look on her face. “I hope we didn’t wake you this morning.”
“I heard nothing. It’s time for me to head to the hospital.”
She went back to feeding Lily. “You keep long hours.”
“That’s what happens when you’re building a transplant program.” He went to the coffeepot and poured himself a cup then leaned a hip against the counter.
“It must be tough to do while taking care of your daughter’s needs at the same time.”
His chest constricted for a second. He’d not told a soul about his father’s betrayal. What should he say? The truth in as few words as possible. It still wouldn’t make it hurt less. “Lily isn’t my daughter. She’s my half-sister.”
Sara gaped. “Your sister? How?”
He shrugged his shoulders. “You know, in the usual way. My father impregnated his very young second wife and, ta-da, I have a baby sister.”
Her eyes widened. “I had no idea. Kim said nothing.”
Grant set his coffee down with exaggerated care. Their gazes met and he said softly, “My father and stepmother both died in a car accident last week.”
Her look of shock deepened to one of disbelief. He didn’t doubt her sincerity when she said, “I’m sorry to hear that. I just assumed your wife left...I’m sorry.”
“I guess, based on my actions so far, you wouldn’t be surprised if my wife had left me. But I don’t have a wife. Never have.” Had never planned to. But that was going to have to change.
Going back to feeding Lily, she said quietly, “I’m sure Lily’s parents would be relieved to know you are taking care of her.”
He looked away. Maybe they would be, maybe they wouldn’t. Either way, Lily was his responsibility now. “I’d like to think so. I just want to make sure I do the right thing by her.”
“I’m sure you will.”
He didn’t miss the catch in her voice. “You can tell that I need help. I can’t see about Lily and be gone all the time.” He gestured helplessly. “You’ve already seen what it’s like for me.” Why did he feel the need to prove himself to this virtual stranger?
“I understand.” Somehow the sympathy in her voice made him feel better. Sara gave her complete attention to the wiggling child in front of her. “Not everyone is cut out to be a parent. All you can do is your best.”
What did she know about that? He liked the idea that in the end he might please his father by keeping Lily. To feel like for once his father was proud of him. His throat constricted. Surely he wasn’t looking for a dead man’s admiration. He would need to give that ugly idea additional thought.
“I have to change her.” Sara picked Lily up and headed out of the room.
If he didn’t get going he would be late to work. He wasn’t used to extra people in his world first thing in his morning. Not even women he dated were allowed to stay overnight at his apartment. Since his father’s death his life had been swirling out of control. He was responsible for a baby. Not just any baby but his sister. Now he had a perfect stranger sharing the same house as well.
* * *
Sara placed Lily in her baby swing, pleased the child was so easy to care for. If not for her fears of getting too close and the unpredictable Dr. Smythe, she might come to like this job. And that was what she was afraid of.
Then there were the moments...like last night when Grant had stood in the doorway half-naked in front of her as if that was all right, or when he’d left the house without a fare-thee-well this morning while she’d been upstairs with Lily that skirted close to arrogance. After all, they were strangers. His behavior made her question the wisdom of staying. Where did the man get off treating people the way he did? What had happened to common courtesy?
Once he returned she’d find out how long she was expected to stay and when she would be paid. She had to start looking for a place to live right away. Meanwhile, when she finished her job here she could decide if she wanted to return to hospice work or look for a different nursing position. Either way, she had her father to think about. Somehow she had to find him a nice safe home.
After lunch, Sara put Lily down for her nap. The child was a beauty. She looked like an angel sleeping. Sara walked away from the crib. Grant would have to find another nanny soon.
She went to the den she’d discovered at the back of the house. With its dark paneling, bookshelves, hardwood floors and overstuffed chairs and couch, it was a perfect place to curl up for some downtime. She settled into the corner of the couch, the baby monitor nearby and the TV on. It wasn’t long before her eyes slipped closed.
Heavy footsteps coming down the hall woke her, announcing that the doctor was home. She had just put her feet on the floor when he appeared in the doorway. From the entry, his look circled the room and came to rest on the desk. His expression was one she couldn’t quite put a name to but it came close to pain. He seemed to have forgotten that she was there. Where had his mind gone? After a few moments his attention focused on her.
“Let’s talk in the front room.” He didn’t give her time to answer before he turned and stalked back down the hallway.
What was wrong with him?
Dr. Smythe was pacing before the formal white brick fireplace when she entered the living room. As she sat on the edge of a chair, he turned and placed an arm on the mantel, looking down at her. Was he trying to intimidate her? It was too late for that.
He cleared his throat. “Again I want to apologize for the abrupt way I left yesterday but it couldn’t be helped.” There was a pause. He must have seen her skeptical lifted brows. “I had a patient waiting in the OR. I appreciate you coming to care for Lily on such short notice.”
“Dr. Smythe, Kim said you only needed me until something permanent could be arranged. How long do you think that will be?”
“Call me Grant. After all, we’ll be living in this house together...” he looked around with what she could only describe as disgust “...for a while. And I’m not sure how long I’ll need you.”
Living here longer than a few days? With him? Holding, feeding and caring for Lily? A breath caught in her throat. Panic filled her chest. She couldn’t get stuck doing this job. The greater the time she spent around Lily the more difficult it would be for her to let go. Sara was well aware of how she would react. It was her nature to get too close to people. And painfully aware of how difficult it was to give up a child.
He must have seen her reaction. “Look, I know we got off on the wrong foot but the other nanny left me high and dry and I needed someone right away.” He moved to sit in the chair closest to her. Placing his elbows on his knees, he leaned toward her. His intense dark gaze held hers. “I’m grateful that you were able to step in. I can already tell you are great with Lily. I would really appreciate it if you could be flexible.”
With his pleading eyes and his calm clear voice, Grant was making it hard for her not to agree. He was a man desperate for help and admitting it. Something she suspected he rarely acknowledged. Could she keep her emotional distance from Lily for however long he needed her? On top of that she would be living with a stranger, and an attractive one at that. When had her life become a soap opera storyline?
Sitting back, he watched her. “I understand you’re a hospice nurse.”
“I am.”
His hands rested on the arm of the chair. “Tough job. Takes a special person to do that kind of work.”
“It’s rewarding.”
Now he was playing the charm card. He was desperate. In any other situation she doubted he’d be interested in her. She wasn’t his type. He was more of the glossy, statuesque and glamorous woman kind of guy while she was the homey, girl-next-door person. Outside of Lily and medicine, she was pretty sure they had little in common.
“I imagine it can be emotionally draining.”
“It can be.” She didn’t want to talk about it. With a sigh, she said, “I’ll agree to two weeks. No more.”
“Excellent.” He smiled then stood, returned to the fireplace and looked up at the portrait of a beautiful young woman. Sara assumed it was Lily’s mother.
“What’re my duties?”
“I just expect you to take care of Lily.”
Sara relaxed on the couch. “Having no idea I would be a live-in nanny, I brought no personal things with me.”
“Feel free to buy what you like. I’m glad to pay.” His tone implied that his thoughts were somewhere else.
He must be kidding. Who gave a woman carte blanche for clothes? “I’ll ask my father to pack me a few things. Could you send a delivery service to bring them here?”
“Give me your address and I’ll take care of it.”
“Thank you. I’ll also need to have Saturdays off.”
He glanced at her, his face holding a stricken look. “I’ll work something out.”
“Am I to be responsible for seeing to the house and food as well?”
Grant appeared perplexed as if the thought had never occurred to him. “Uh, there’s a housekeeper who comes in once a week. Please handle the groceries and supplies for yourself and the baby. You’re welcome to have it all delivered. I’ll put some money at your disposal.”
“Thank you. I’ll be sure to keep a record of how it’s spent.”
“I’ll be in and out, mostly out, and I’ll leave all that to you. If you need anything and can’t reach me, just contact my assistant.” He fished a card out of his slacks and handed it to her. “By the way, there’s a car at your disposal in the garage behind the house. It already has a car seat in it. The key is hanging beside the kitchen door. You can pull your car around and use the bay next to the black sedan. I have to get back to the hospital.” With that statement he disappeared out the door.
Sara needed to call her father and let him know the arrangements. That she would not be home for a couple of weeks. When she had spoken to him last night he had sounded concerned about her staying at a stranger’s house but understood her need to remain there with Lily. Now, on the phone, her father sounded sad.
“Sara, you shouldn’t have to be doing something you really don’t want to. It’s my fault we’re in this position. You should be living your life, having your own family, instead of caring for someone else’s child and worrying over my stupid decisions.”
She winced at the words your own family. That might never be possible. “We’ve talked about this before and I don’t want to hear any more about it. We’re in this together. Anyway, everything is going to be all right. I’ll find us somewhere to live. Enough about that. Daddy, would you please pack a few things for me in a bag for the next few days?”
“Sure, little girl.”
Sara gave him a list. “A delivery service will come by to pick the suitcase up.”
“I’ll have it ready.”
* * *
Grant arrived back at his father’s house well after dark. The front porch light was on. He pulled his vehicle into the bay beside Sara’s.
A light was on over the back door and one shone in the kitchen. Sara was a considerate woman. He entered through the kitchen door. His intention was to go straight to bed but a piece of paper on the counter caught his eye. In clear penmanship was written, “Please let me know when you come and go. I like to know when someone is in the house.”
He’d been accountable to himself for so long that he’d never even thought to say anything when he came or went. Crumbling the note into a ball, he tossed it in the trash before starting toward the stairs. In his room he emptied his pockets and kicked off his shoes. Walking through the bathroom adjoining his and Sara’s bedrooms, he found Sara’s door closed. It would be his guess that she’d had no idea that they shared a bathroom when she’d picked this room. He tapped lightly on her door. No response. Rapping again, he listened and then opened it. Light shone across the floor. Sara looked small in the large bed with only a sheet covering her.
“Sara,” he called in a low voice. He didn’t want to startle her but she had asked for notification when he arrived.
“Um...” She twisted toward him, giving him a glimpse of firm behind covered in hot pink panties.
When Kim had told him she knew someone who could help him, he’d assumed it would be an older female. Not a pretty young woman. Being attracted to the nanny hadn’t been part of his plan. That didn’t make him much better than his father. No woman off limits. With a sick feeling he categorized them both as lechers. The one person he had no interest in being like was his father.
“Sara,” he called again.
She sat up part way.
“I’m home,” he almost growled.
Instead of a T-shirt she wore a nightie with spaghetti straps. The delivery man had apparently brought her clothes. As she turned, the material tightened, giving him a glimpse of the curve of a breast.
He couldn’t do this nightly. His libido would get the better of him. Neither did he need to chase her off. The rapport between them was tentative enough as it was. He desperately needed a nanny and he couldn’t have her backing out on their agreement.
“Oh. Okay. Thanks for letting me know.”
“Sure.” The hallway door was the closest and his fastest escape. From now on he’d come home well before bedtime or leave a note on the door.
* * *
Over the next three days Sara spent the time feeding, changing and cleaning Lily. While she did so she made sure she didn’t hold Lily any longer than necessary. The more she looked into the sweet face or played with Lily, the more Sara knew it would be increasingly difficult to leave her when the time came. She wasn’t going there again. The first time hadn’t ended well. Giving up Emily had been too hard.
Keeping her emotional distance was her goal. She only had a few more days to go. If she could earn enough for a down payment on a place to live and keep her heart uninvolved, she would consider it a job well done. Even now she feared she might have some trouble leaving Lily when the time came but she would do it. She’d done it before and would do it again.
She wasn’t having the same problem with Grant. Despite all the time she’d spent with Lily, she’d only seen Grant a handful of times. They had said one or two words to each other and he had been out the door each morning, and after that first day he’d not even picked up Lily.
Except for the one night he’d awakened her he hadn’t stayed at the house. She’d checked the master bedroom each morning and the bed hadn’t been slept in, but he’d been in the kitchen dressed and ready to go when she and Lily had come down. Surely he wasn’t spending that much time at the hospital.
Sara hadn’t bargained on sleeping in the huge house by herself and she didn’t like it. She needed to speak to Grant and see what the deal was. He was probably staying out at night, having a good time with a woman. Did he have a girlfriend? What if he did? Why would she care? It was none of her business.
He never asked about Lily or ever really had any interaction with her when he was home. It was as if he was afraid to have anything to do with the child. Was he purposely making sure he didn’t become fond of her because he was worried he might lose her?
Early Wednesday morning the house phone rang. Sara didn’t bother to pick it up. The answering-machine would get it. From where she stood at the kitchen sink she could hear the message.
“Mrs. Smythe, this is the children’s clinic, calling to remind you that Lily has an appointment at four o’clock today with Dr. Gomaz for her two-month checkup. Please call if you won’t be there.”
Why hadn’t Grant told her about the appointment? Didn’t he know she should be informed of those sorts of things? He shouldn’t have custody of Lily if he couldn’t handle the details of her life.
Mrs. Smythe couldn’t make it but Sara would see Lily was at the appointment.
By that afternoon, Sara had to admit that getting a baby fed and dressed on a deadline was not for the meek and mild. Just strapping one in a car seat was a feat in itself. She had started just after breakfast and she was going to have to hurry to get to the appointment on time. It didn’t help that she was driving an unfamiliar car. At the hospital where the children’s clinic was located, she drove around and around the parking structure, finally locating a space on the top level.
Sara worked Lily out between the parked cars. Removing the stroller from the rear, she was glad she’d had the forethought to bring it. It was unbelievable that one small child was so difficult to handle. Sara smiled. The old saying about walking in a man’s shoes to know what he really did was true.
She managed to get to the doctor’s office just minutes before the appointment. Thankfully the wait wasn’t long. Soon Lily’s name was called. The doctor pronounced her healthy and said she needed a shot. After that the smiling nurse gave it. It hurt Sara almost as if she’d been the one the needle had been used on. Tears came to her eyes. She cuddled the crying Lily close, softly reassuring her.
Still holding Lily, she pushed the stroller out to the checkout window. A sick feeling hit her. She had no way of paying. She’d forgotten to ask Grant about an insurance card. There wasn’t enough money in her personal account for her to cover the cost of the visit.
“Can you just bill Dr. Grant Smythe?” she asked the receptionist.
“I’m sorry but payment is due at time of service.”
“I’m the nanny. Can’t I make some kind of arrangement?” Why hadn’t she’d thought this trip through?
The woman shook her head.
Hot with embarrassment, Sara said, “I need a moment to make a call.” Putting a squalling Lily in her stroller, Sara found her phone and located Grant’s number. She touched it and waited for the call to go through. The longer it rang, the more troubled she became that Grant wouldn’t answer.
The exasperated “Yes?” on the other end both startled and relieved her.
“It’s...” she glanced at the receptionist “...Sara. I’m sorry to bother you but I’m at the children’s clinic—”
“Has something happened?” His voice filled with concern, catching her off guard.
“No, Lily is fine. She had a checkup today. They expect to be paid.”
There was a deep sigh on the other end of the phone. “You needed an insurance card.”
Lily let out an unhappy bellow.
Sara covered her ear. “What?”
“What’s wrong with her?” Grant’s louder voice filled her phone.
“She had a shot and she’s sleepy.” Sara tried hard to contain her irritation.
“Do you have enough money to pay?”
“No. I just bought groceries and this isn’t just a co-pay. Since I have no insurance card, they expect me to pay the entire bill.”
“I’m coming right over.” The connection was broken.
Sara sat in the waiting room, trying to calm the crying Lily, grateful that the hospital was just next door.
Ten minutes later in walked Grant dressed in his blue scrubs with his bright white lab coat pulled over them. He wore black clogs on his feet. All the women in the room stopped what they were doing to look at him. He really was a striking male. It wasn’t that he was glossy cover model handsome as much as he had a commanding presence. He radiated a vibe of being in control. His rich dark hair, intense brown eyes and tall physique made him attractive, but his mystique was what held women spellbound. Including her. She gulped.
Grant stalked to the reception window and spoke quietly to the woman, who smiled up at him like a sap. He indicated Sara and Lily. Minutes later he joined her. “Okay, that’s settled.”
“Thank you.” Sara stood. “Now, just one more thing.”
Grant looked as if he couldn’t be bothered.
Sara held out Lily. “Please hold her while I go to the ladies’ room.”
It took him a moment before his hands slowly circled the whimpering baby’s chest. Lily’s feet dangled.
Didn’t he know how to handle a baby? It didn’t matter. He was going to have to hold Lily at least for a few minutes.
CHAPTER THREE (#ulink_910527ed-c00f-5df5-b718-8ed98aa18f20)
GRANT HAD AVOIDED moments like this since he’d been given guardianship of Lily. Handling her made him think that this could have been his child. Instead it was his father’s. The father Grant had never measured up to or been good enough for, except where his girlfriend had been concerned. And his father had stolen her.
Lily whined. He pulled her to his chest and patted her back. She quieted. He was thankful and fairly sure the others in the waiting room were too. He observed Lily’s bright eyes surrounded by her peach-colored skin. A soft coo bubbled from his half-sister’s lips. Her hand found his pinky finger and circled it.
He may have had a poor relationship with his father and stepmother but he wouldn’t betray this tiny being, as he had been. He was obligated to her, to give her what he hadn’t had from their father. Even if Evelyn’s family won custody, Lily would have his support. She would grow up knowing she had a brother she could depend on. Someone who believed in her.
“You must be a wonderful father,” commented a woman with graying hair, interrupting his thoughts. She sat beside a young mother. “Your wife is lucky.”
“I’m...” He didn’t say any more. It wasn’t worth the effort to explain.
Minutes later, Sara returned.
“Okay, I’ll take her now.”
Before he could hand Lily over the woman spoke up again. “You should have seen your husband in action. Your baby stopped fussing the second he held her close.”
Sara looked at him with wide, questioning eyes as if she was surprised. “She did?”
“She did.” It gave him an inordinate amount of satisfaction to say that.
Sara smiled at him. “It’s not so hard to do if you want to.”
Was she referring to him holding Lily or stopping her from crying or both? Apparently Sara had noticed how he’d managed to get around having much interaction with his sister.
“Would you like me to take Lily now? I’m sure you need to get back to work.”
The note of hope in Sara’s voice that he would need to hurry back to work irritated him. To his astonishment, he said, “I’m done for the day and I’m hungry. Why don’t we go to a little café around the corner and get some supper?”
“With Lily?” Sara’s look of surprise was almost comical.
“Sure. Parents do it all the time. I think two intelligent adults can manage a two-month-old for an hour. You did bring a bottle, didn’t you?”
“Yes, but...”
He started to hand Lily to her but the baby began to cry again. He brought Lily back to his chest and she stopped.
“I guess you’d better carry her.” Sara didn’t turn fast enough to hide her disappointment. It was as if it hurt her to have Lily prefer him over her. Was she that insecure?
Left with no choice, Grant headed out the door and into the hallway with Lily happy in his arms. He led the way outside, across the bricked park area and down the sidewalk.
“By the way, did you know that Lily had a doctor’s visit today and just forget to tell me?” Sara asked.
“No. How did you know about it?”
“There was a reminder call on the house phone.”
He shifted Lily to his other arm. “I looked for a calendar but Evelyn wasn’t very good at details, except when it came to her makeup.”
“That sounded a little harsh. You get a pass this time for not telling me, but the new nanny needs to have some notice when Lily is supposed to be somewhere. And provided with an insurance card.”
“Noted.”
She followed him down the sidewalk, pushing the empty stroller. “I’ve laughed at people carrying a child while pushing a stroller. Now I understand.”
Grant gave her a wry smile. Lily was getting heavier in his arms. “It does look ridiculous. The café is just down this way.” When they arrived at the glass-fronted eatery he held the door open for Sara. “Let’s take that table in the back. We’ll be out of the way.”
Sara parked the stroller beside the table. “Is she asleep?”
“I think so.”
“Let me see.” She went up on tiptoe and looked into the crook of his arm. The top of Sara’s head was just inches away. She smelled of roses. Was it a scent she wore or her shampoo? Whichever, it was nice. He inhaled deeply.
“She is,” Sara declared. “Let me take her. I’ll put her in the stroller.”
“I can do that.” What had gotten into him?
“Okay. Let me lower the seat so it’s flat. Hopefully she’ll sleep until we get home.”
Home. Sara was calling his father’s place home. It wasn’t home to him. The only reason he was staying there was because of Lily. His apartment was a bachelor’s pad and he liked it that way. Truthfully, he hadn’t really felt at home anywhere since he’d been a child. What he remembered about his father’s house was that it was where his mother had cried and begged his father not to leave her. His brother had already been living in Idaho, leaving Grant alone to deal with his parents’ decaying marriage.
If he gained permanent custody of Lily he’d need to find a new place. He’d have to make arrangements for her to have a good place to grow up. Or could he get past his feelings about his father’s home enough to live there? Over the last few days it hadn’t been memories keeping him away but the young woman sitting across from him.
“Excuse me, what?” Sara had said something, bringing him back to where he was.
“I wanted to know if you came home last night. I waited up to talk to you but it got late.”
“No, I went to my apartment.”
“It would have been common courtesy to call.”
He met her gaze. “Do you always say what you think?”
“Not always.”
Was she holding back her thoughts about him? “I didn’t make it home until one and I didn’t think you’d want me to call that late.”
She gave him a keen look. Was she implying he hadn’t even thought to call?
A college-age waitress came to their table. “Hi, Doc, I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“Hi, Karen. I’ve been a little busy of late.”
“You never said anything about having a wife and baby, Doc. Cute.”
“Thank you. What would you like, Sara?”
Sara gave him another look, her eyes narrowing. She had a way of making him uneasy. His father’s look hadn’t held that much censure. Grant shifted uncomfortably. Did Sara suspect he’d flirted with the girl?
“BLT and water. Thanks,” Sara said, with a smile at Karen.
“And I’ll have a Reuben with a soda, please.”
“It’ll be out right away.” The girl smiled at him then looked down at Lily sleeping soundly. The waitress shook her head slightly. “You learn something new every day.”
He looked at Sara. Her unreadable gaze held his.
“It’s too hard to explain about our relationship, I know. I’m sorry all of this has happened to Lily. To you.” She sounded truly sympathetic. For once he appreciated it.
“It’s more about Lily. My father and I never really got along.”
Sorrow filled her eyes. “Still, you must be grieving on some level. He was your father after all.”
Grant didn’t like to think about it. He shrugged. “The S.O.B. made my life, my mother’s life miserable yet there’s something about knowing I’ll never see him again that does bother me.” How could Sara’s simple questioning and earnest looks make him say things he wouldn’t tell anyone?
She drew imaginary figures on the tabletop with the tip of her finger. “There must have been some good times.”
Grant gave that idea some thought. Had there been? Before the divorce? Had the later years overshadowed everything he could remember about his father?
She continued to draw. Without warning, she looked up and volunteered, “I would miss my father if he died. He’s the only family I have. He raised me. If anything happened to him I don’t know what I would do.”
Did he miss his father? He’d been so wrapped up in Lily, the funeral, estate affairs and his anger, he’d not had time to think about his real feelings. He didn’t want to contemplate those now. “What about your mother?”
“She left us when I was four and I haven’t seen her since.”
“Not even heard from her?”
“Nope.”
As horrible as his relationship had been with his father, at least he’d had two parents. He and his mother had remained close. Even though she lived out of state, he still talked to her weekly. “I’m sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry about. It’s just the way it is.” Did Sara take everything that came into her life with such matter-of-fact acceptance?
“So, have you always lived with your father?” He didn’t usually take the kind of interest in a woman that warranted that type of question.
A worried looked formed on her face then disappeared. “Yes. He’s disabled. There was an explosion at work years ago and he was hurt.”
What had that look been about? Why was he asking all these questions about her personal life? He never involved himself in a woman’s life beyond what was required for a good time. His rule was not to make any commitments other than the one to his mother. He didn’t trust his judgement of women. The less they knew about him the smaller the chances of him being hurt. He didn’t need to know this stuff for her to care for Lily. Perhaps the sharing-a-meal idea hadn’t been his wisest.
“Have you found a nanny to replace me?”
He didn’t look at her. “No.”
“Have you looked? My time will be up soon.”
Grant met her gaze. “I thought I could maybe talk you into staying a while longer.”
She slowly shook her head. “That wasn’t our agreement.”
“I know. But I need your help. Don’t you need the money?”
Her face turned red and she looked away.
“You said something about being evicted the other day. If you will stay, I’ll make it worth your while.”
“It won’t matter. My father has to be out by this Saturday.”
“So where do you plan to go?”
“I don’t know. I’ve not had time to look for anything. I guess to a hotel until I can find us a place.”
The waitress brought their food and left.
“Anyway, you have enough to worry about with Lily. This is my problem and I’ll handle it.”
She was making it pretty clear she didn’t want to talk about it any more. He needed to figure out some way to at least get her to stay a little longer.
They ate in silence. Grant had completed his meal and Sara was still working on hers when Lily stirred.
“Do you mind giving her a bottle while I finish?” Sara asked, pulling one out of the bag hanging on the stroller.
“Won’t she wait?”
Sara’s look implied he had to be kidding. “Yeah, for about three seconds and then she’ll cry loud enough to break the windows. What’s the deal about holding her anyway? You did a good job earlier. It’s just a bottle. She does all the work.”
“I guess I could.”
“Thank you. I’ll be done here in a minute. Then I’ll change her diaper and we’ll get out of your hair.”
“You’re not in my hair. I told you I was finished for today.”
“You’re sure acting like we are.”
Sara was starting to annoy him. “Well, you’re not.”
“That’s the way it sounded to me.” She placed the bottle on the table in front of him as if she was daring him to admit he was afraid to feed Lily.
“It did not.” He was reluctant but had no plans to admit it.
Sara laughed and the sound rippled through him, almost a caress. “We sound like high-schoolers.”
Grant grinned. His life had been so serious for so long it was nice to smile. “Rather silly ones at that.” He lifted Lily out of the stroller and cradled her in his arm. “Okay, this is my first baby feeding. What do I do?”
“Just put the bottle to her lips and she’ll handle the rest.”
Grant did as instructed and Lily quit crying the second she had the nipple. He beamed at Sara as she finished eating.
“I told you. Nothing to it.”
Lily had finished her meal and Sara stood. “Let me have her and I’ll take her to the restroom for a burp and a diaper change. If you don’t mind, would you push the stroller out?”
Sara reached down, again coming close enough for his senses to appreciate her, and took Lily into her arms. She did so with complete confidence. It was hard not to trust her. Something he never did where women were concerned. “This baby stuff comes natural to you, doesn’t it?”
A startled expression mixed with regret crossed her face. “I learned most of what I know from babysitting as a kid.”
Grant watched them go. It was the perfect maternal picture. They could be mother and daughter.
As in Lily’s mother.
A wife.
Sara had said she was being evicted. If he offered her a place to live, would she consider marrying him as a business deal? Kill two birds with one stone? The idea was too crazy. But Leon had said that he needed to be married if he stood a chance of keeping Lily. Desperate people did crazy things. What would he lose by asking her? The most she could do was slap his face and quit.
He’d have to give the idea some thought.
* * *
Sara washed the bottle she’d used to feed Lily. It was hard to believe she’d been working with Lily and living with Grant for almost a week. Soon she would be on her way. She and her father would rent a trailer on Saturday and move their belongings to a cheap hotel down the road from the apartment complex and then spend what was left of the day looking for another place to live. It made her tired just thinking about what was ahead.
Grant would have to take care of Lily or find someone else to for the day. That wasn’t her worry. She needed some time away from Lily anyway. Maybe all the packing she had to do would take her mind off how much she enjoyed being a mother to the baby.
The outside kitchen door was unlocked and to her astonishment Grant walked in. He carried two bags of Chinese food. Other than the meal they’d shared at the café, he’d shown little indication that she and Lily existed.
He placed the bags on the table. “I thought you might like some takeout.”
It was thoughtful of him and totally out of character from what she’d seen. “I like Chinese.”
“Great.”
She put Lily in the windup swing nearby. “I’ll get us something to drink. Is tea okay?”
“Sure.”
Grant had pulled white cardboard boxes out of the bags and placed them on the table by the time she returned with their glasses.
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