Bring On The Night
Sara Orwig
This time he was playing for keeps Colonel Jonah Whitewolf had always lived life on the edge, whether it was in the Special Forces or working for a security company, but nothing could have prepared him for the shock of stumbling upon his ex-wife…and the son he had never known.With Kate and little Henry sharing his house, Jonah wanted only to spend every day with his son…and every night seducing the woman he'd loved and lost. But with danger haunting his ranch, Jonah hoped that Kate would trust him and understand that this time he wasn't risking his life for his job but for his family.
“You’re going to tell him the truth today and now—here at the park—or I will,” Jonah said in a voice of steel.
“I don’t want to be cheated of knowing my son one more day.”
She nodded. “All right, Jonah. I guess you have that right.”
“Damn straight I do. What have you told him about me—about us?” Jonah asked. “Did you tell him we’re divorced?”
“Yes. I told him that the army was important to you, and you were gone most of the time, so we decided it would be best to part. I told him you wanted out of the marriage.”
“Kate, that’s a damned lie,” Jonah said, standing again and pacing away from her, fury making him shake once more. He whipped around. “You’re the one who walked.”
Dear Reader,
Welcome to another month of excitingly romantic reading from Silhouette Intimate Moments. Ruth Langan starts things off with a bang in Vendetta, the third of her four DEVIL’S COVE titles. Blair Colby came back to town looking for a quiet summer. Instead he found danger, mystery—and love.
Fans of Sara Orwig’s STALLION PASS miniseries will be glad to see it continued in Bring On The Night, part of STALLION PASS: TEXAS KNIGHTS, also a fixture in Silhouette Desire. Mix one tough agent, the ex-wife he’s never forgotten and the son he never knew existed, and you have a recipe for high emotion. Whether you experienced our FAMILY SECRETS continuity or are new to it now, you won’t want to miss our six FAMILY SECRETS: THE NEXT GENERATION titles, starting with Jenna Mills’ A Cry In The Dark. Ana Leigh’s Face of Deception is the first of her BISHOP’S HEROES stories, and your heart will beat faster with every step of Mike Bishop’s mission to rescue Ann Hamilton and her adopted son from danger. Are you a fan of the paranormal? Don’t miss One Eye Open, popular author Karen Whiddon’s first book for the line, which features a shape-shifting heroine and a hero who’s all man. Finally, go To The Limit with new author Virginia Kelly, who really knows how to write heart-pounding romantic adventure.
And come back next month, for more of the best and most exciting romance reading around, right here in Silhouette Intimate Moments.
Yours,
Leslie J. Wainger
Executive Editor
Bring on the Night
Sara Orwig
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
SARA ORWIG
lives in Oklahoma. She has a patient husband who will take her on research trips anywhere from big cities to old forts. She is an avid collector of Western history books. With a master’s degree in English, Sara has written historical romance, mainstream fiction and contemporary romance. Books are beloved treasures that take Sara to magical worlds, and she loves both reading and writing them.
Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Epilogue
Prologue
“Revenge is better than money,” the man said quietly. Raking his blond hair away from his face, he stood in the hallway of San Antonio’s busy airport and glanced again at the listing that showed Flight 10 from Amarillo, Texas, was on time.
Through the windows the man could see bright sunshine outside, no bad weather to interfere with incoming flights. Inside the lobby people hurried to and fro, pilots strode past on their way to departure gates, lines grew longer at the security checks.
The man waited patiently, his gaze searching the crowd. He wanted to make certain that the flight had arrived and the special passenger was on it. His blue eyes scanned each dark-haired man, pausing briefly on first one and then another. Then his gaze was arrested.
A tall, black-haired man in a charcoal knit sport shirt and jeans crossed the airport lobby and headed toward a rental car desk, where he set his flight bag on the floor and spoke to a smiling attendant.
The man watched him smile even as his fingers curled and his fists knotted. “You’re hurrying to get your inheritance, aren’t you, Colonel Whitewolf? You think you’re so tough, with your Special Forces training. None of it will do you any good. You’ll see. You’ll go down. You’ll be first, then the others. It’s already started. While you get your car, I’ll go out to the ranch and have it ready for you. A real warm welcome.” He laughed softly.
He walked outside and hurried to a black, two-door sports car he had stolen only an hour earlier. The tags had been changed and he knew no one would bother him.
He started the engine and pulled out of the parking space, glancing in the rearview mirror at the terminal, thinking about Colonel Jonah Whitewolf, who was probably still inside at the rental desk.
“When I get through with you, you’ll regret you ever accepted your inheritance. You’re trained to deal with an enemy you can see. Now you’ll have to deal with an enemy you won’t see. Welcome to Texas, Colonel. Welcome to hell.”
Chapter 1
A bullet could change a man’s life in the blink of an eye, Jonah Whitewolf knew, but he’d never expected to have his life transformed while sitting quietly in an office.
As he stood at the car rental desk in San Antonio the memory of that moment in April still haunted him.
He recalled how he had listened in stunned disbelief as the lawyer quietly read from John Frates’s will, listing the inheritance: “To Jonah Whitewolf, to whom I am profoundly indebted, I bequeath the Long Bar Ranch, which is the Frateses’ working cattle ranch. This ranch, the livestock, the house, the land, the mineral and water rights and everything included in the ranch, shall go to Jonah Whitewolf to do with as he deems proper. In addition to the Long Bar Ranch, one and a third million dollars is hereby bequeathed to Jonah Whitewolf to do with as he sees fit.”
In shock, Jonah had stared at the lawyer. Her announcement was a moment cast in his memory forever. He could still remember how his surroundings had become unforgettable—the beautiful blond lawyer’s oak desk, her gold pen and pencil set, her slender hands holding papers as she read, the tall clock quietly ticking, the faint scent of roses in a crystal vase on a polished wooden table. Every sight, sound and smell had been etched in memory in that instant when his world changed entirely….
While the attorney had continued reading, Jonah had glanced at Michael Remington and Boone Devlin, two of his closest buddies from past days in Special Forces. Five years ago, the three of them, along with another Special Forces friend, Colin Garrick, deceased, had rescued John Frates when he had been held hostage in Colombia. Because of that rescue the three survivors of the mission were now inheriting fortunes. Mike Remington looked as shocked as Jonah felt, but then Mike’s inheritance had been an incredible surprise: John Frates’s town house in Stallion Pass, Texas, a million and a third dollars—and John’s baby daughter.
Boone had seemed equally shocked by his bequest of a nationally famous quarter horse ranch. Jonah had been faintly relieved that he hadn’t received a baby, although he had been plenty shocked to be willed a cattle ranch plus the money. He recalled thinking how ironic at this point in his life to inherit such a thing. Had the inheritance come six or seven years ago, he would have been able to save his marriage.
Unbidden, memories of his ex-wife, Kate, had crept into his thoughts. He had loved her then, and her loss still hurt today. Kate’s image floated into his consciousness: silky chestnut hair, enormous hazel eyes, thick dark lashes. An ache in his chest brought him back to reality, and he forced the memories away.
His job in Special Forces had caused the divorce. If he had had a ranch and a fortune, how different life might have been! He closed his mind to that course of thinking. What-ifs could ruin your life.
A cattle ranch and over a million dollars…His family would be ecstatic for him. Jonah thought about his present job—working around the world, putting out oil well fires. A ranch would give him an opportunity to settle in one place. On the other hand, he would be more isolated than ever.
The amount of money was staggering. He was well paid in his job, but this was wealth beyond anything he had ever dreamed of.
The minute the lawyer, Savannah Clay, finished reading the will, she looked at them with her big blue eyes. “You each will receive a copy of the document. Do any of you have questions?”
Silence was heavy in the room and the attorney had arched her brows. “No questions?”
“I’m not sure I believe this is happening,” Jonah stated quietly.
“It’s already happened,” Savannah replied in a well-modulated, no-nonsense voice. “John Frates felt strongly about what he wanted to do with his fortune.”
Again the silence was broken only by the ticking of the tall clock in her office. Once more she asked, “None of you has a question?”
“Yes,” Jonah said. “If I choose not to keep the ranch, can I sell it?”
“There are papers to sign, but yes, once this inheritance is legally yours, you are free to do with it as you choose.”
Jonah nodded. “If we sell, we get the money, plus the million and a third that each of us inherited?”
“That’s correct,” she replied firmly. “That’s only a portion of the Frates fortune. For the rest of their lives, his in-laws, Dina Frates’s parents who are in rehab, will be provided for. There is a foundation, trusts, other bequests to charities. But the three of you got his personal things and part of the Frateses’ estate. He intended Colin Garrick to have a share as well, but upon Colin’s demise, he changed the will and that money was divided, which is why each of you got a million and a third. He rounded up the total to make it equal.”
“How soon do we have to see about all this?” Jonah asked. “I’m supposed to leave for Russia next Sunday.”
“There’s no hurry. The ranch has an excellent foreman and manager. John Frates was just there part of the time and had nothing to do with running the place.”
“So we’re free to sell these inheritances?” Boone repeated.
“Yes,” Savannah Clay answered. While she talked to him, Jonah looked at Mike, who was silent and white as snow. His friend kept raking his fingers through his wavy black hair, an uncustomary gesture.
Jonah had seen Mike shot and he had seen Mike in critical, life-threatening situations. Remington was a cool, quick thinker, able to move and act swiftly, tough as well as brave, but at the reading of the will he had seemed on the verge of fainting.
“Are you all right?” Jonah whispered as the others talked.
Mike swiveled his head and gave Jonah a glassy-eyed stare. “Yes,” he murmured, but Jonah wasn’t convinced. Mike was not his usual take-charge self. Yet Jonah knew that inheriting a baby would be a shock far greater than inheriting ranches, as he and Boone had.
“Any questions, Colonel Remington?” the attorney asked.
“Yes, but I’ll wait until the others are through so I don’t take up their time,” Mike replied.
Even though they protested, Mike did wait, and finally Jonah and Boone signed papers, got their copies of the will and left the lawyer’s office.
“What a day this has been,” Boone remarked as they stepped into the sunshine. “When I flew in here, I thought the three of us would have a reunion and that would be it.”
“Yeah. Life takes strange turns,” Jonah replied. “Nobody knows that any better than the three of us do. I wish Colin were here to claim his inheritance.” Both men were silent until they reached black cars parked side by side. Then they stopped and faced each other. Boone had his hands on his hips, his tan sport coat pushed open. “See you back at the hotel. I’m going to swim, and then let’s have happy hour and celebrate our inheritance,” he said with a grin.
“Sounds fine with me. I’m still in shock,” Jonah replied as he shed his navy suit coat and pulled off his navy tie.
“I think all three of us are in shock, but Mike’s been hit the hardest. And I don’t blame him. Thank goodness he’s the one with the baby,” Boone said, unlocking his car door and tossing his sport coat on the seat.
“Yeah, I guess.” Jonah felt an aching twist deep inside.
“Man, you’re still hung up about your ex? Get over her,” Boone said, turning back to frown at Jonah. “You can marry again and have a passel of kids.”
“Boone, have you ever been in love, even once? I mean really in love?” Jonah asked, mildly annoyed by his friend’s remarks.
“Hell, no, not like you were. And I’m not going to be, either. No marriage chains for me. Lighten up.” With a flash of white teeth, Boone Devlin grinned. “The world has lots of beautiful, exciting women. You need to get out and about and forget her.”
“Sure,” Jonah answered dismissively, remembering what a playboy Boone was.
“And don’t bury yourself on a ranch, although there’s small danger of that. You’ll sell your inheritance as fast as I intend to sell mine.”
“Maybe not. I’m going to think about it and look the place over.”
“What do you know about cattle ranching?”
“I told you that my grandfather had a ranch, and I spent every summer there when I was growing up,” Jonah replied.
“You move to a ranch and you’ll be a hermit,” Boon warned, jiggling his car keys in his hand.
“As if I socialize a lot out in the oil field.”
Boone laughed and opened the door of his car. “See you at the hotel.” Each climbed into his rental car and drove out of the lot.
Jonah shoved those April memories aside and smiled at the clerk behind the rental counter. Moments later, he strode out of the San Antonio airport into bright sunshine on a cool, early June morning. After quitting his job and selling the home he owned in Midland, Texas, he was back in San Antonio to look at his inheritance for the second time.
He wanted to work the ranch, and from the time he’d made his decision, his eagerness to make the move had grown.
In the space of time between his first trip to San Antonio and this one, another shock had transpired. Savannah Clay, the lawyer who had read John Frates’s will to them, had married Mike Remington—a marriage of convenience to give Frates’s baby girl a mother and father. Jonah was surprised, and wondered how happy Mike was with the arrangement.
As Jonah neared the gates to the ranch, however, he forgot about Mike Remington. Green fields spread endlessly to the horizon. Stands of oaks gave shade to the hills, which were bright with patches of wildflowers. All land he owned…Then Jonah spotted two spirals of gray smoke rising against the deep blue sky, and he wondered what was burning.
As he drove along, watching the plumes of smoke darken and expand, Jonah had a gut feeling that something was wrong. The ranch hands could be burning off a field, but he didn’t think so.
Clamping his teeth together, he pressed the accelerator, speeding along until he reached the turn to the ranch house, then bouncing over the cattle guard. The ominous black smoke increased and he gunned the engine, skidding on gravel along the drive.
In the distance he heard sirens that only confirmed his suspicions. Another few seconds of driving and he saw bright orange tongues of flame spiraling in the sky. He caught up with a pickup truck speeding ahead of him.
Then, at another turn, the ranch house, barn and outbuildings came into view. Trees burned in two areas while flames shot up one wall of the barn, Jonah saw, but the roof hadn’t yet caught and men were pouring water on the blaze. Men fought the three blazes.
Other men carried equipment out of the barn. The wail of sirens grew louder as Jonah ran to help save the barn.
He approached the gang pouring water on the barn fire. Jonah took a hose from one of the men to relieve him, and directed ranch hands where to turn other hoses. He yelled for someone to get a ladder, and in seconds he’d braced the ladder against the barn wall. He climbed to the roof, tugging the heavy hose up with him and then motioning to a man on the ground to turn the water on again.
Flames danced in front of Jonah’s face, but he knew if they could keep the roof from going up they could contain the fire.
Two pumper trucks had arrived and started to spray big streams of water on the blaze. They could easily reach the roof, so Jonah tossed down his hose and climbed back down the ladder.
When he reached the ground, he took the hose and ran around to the entranceway, planning to go into the burning barn.
“Mr. Whitewolf! Don’t go in there!” Scott Adamson, the barrel-chested foreman, yelled at him.
Jonah shook his head and charged into the barn, where he spotted flames in a far corner. Dragging the hose, he ran forward and turned the hose on the conflagration.
A cowboy arrived to help him, and Jonah motioned to the loft. “I’m going up,” he yelled above the roar of the fire.
“That blaze could consume the loft in minutes,” the man warned, but Jonah was already climbing. “Pass the hose to me,” he called.
The man climbed behind Jonah, then handed him the nozzle. Jonah tugged on the hose and turned it on the flames.
Sweat poured off him and he could hear men yelling outside, but within minutes the blaze inside seemed under control.
When he climbed down from the loft, there were four other men in the barn, fighting the dying fire. He looked at the charred structure and knew the corner would have to be rebuilt, but the flames would be doused in minutes and the barn had been saved. The other fires had been brought under control.
He handed the hose to one of the cowboys. “I want to look around in here,” he said, skirting smoldering embers. “Keep the water flowing, because this could all burst back into flame.”
It took him only five minutes to find where he thought the fire had started. He straightened up and strode outside, past firemen who kept hoses trained on the charred and blackened wood. Cowboys had turned off the spigots to the ranch’s well water, no longer needed now.
Scott Adamson walked up to Jonah and shook his hand. “Thanks for your help, but you shouldn’t have put yourself at risk by going into the building.”
“It was safe enough,” Jonah said, brushing aside his foreman’s concern. “I need to talk to one of the officials about the fire. It was deliberately set.”
“Aw, hell!”
“You don’t sound surprised or shocked,” Jonah said, his eyes narrowing.
Adamson took his hat off to wipe sweat from his brow and rake his red hair back from his face. “We’ve had bad things happen lately. Some sick cattle—someone put poison in a water tank—some smashed fences. I thought it was kids doing pranks that got out of hand, but now I don’t know. This happened in broad daylight. Plus it was three separate fires. Someone set them. Fortunately, one of the men spotted the fires when they had just started and we had men close at hand to fight the flames.”
“It doesn’t look like the work of kids.”
“C’mon. I’ll introduce you to Tank Grayson. He’s the man you need to talk to. He knows fires, but then I guess you do, too.”
Jonah spent the next thirty minutes with the thin, blond fireman, who went inside the barn with him and confirmed Jonah’s suspicions.
“We’ll have an official analysis, but you’re right. This was started with kerosene and rags. So was the one in the trees. Anyone opposed to you moving here?”
“Not that I know of,” Jonah answered, perplexed. “Scott Adamson said that other things have been happening around here—poison in a stock tank. That kind of thing.”
The fireman shook his head. “This could have been a hell of a lot worse. We’ll let you know what we find out.”
Jonah shook hands with him and went outside to thank all the others for their help. As he shook his foreman’s hand and thanked him, Scott nodded.
“Anytime there’s a fire, everyone pitches in. We’re fortunate to have a good supply of well water, and Mr. Frates put in a fine system of water mains and spigots. Otherwise this barn would have been gone.”
“Well, I’m grateful for everyone’s help. We can rebuild that corner and it’ll be like new again. I’ll see if I can’t arrange a bonus for everyone with the next paycheck.”
“That would make a lot of guys happy, although they didn’t do this for a bonus.”
“I know that, but they took some risks fighting that fire.”
“Not like the ones you took.” Scott eyed Jonah. “I guess you’re going to live up to your reputation.”
“How so?”
The older man shrugged as he looked at the barn. “All that Special Forces stuff…Damn, I don’t know why anyone would do this.”
“I don’t, either. Well, I’m going to go get cleaned up.”
He glanced down the road at houses of people who worked on the ranch. If the fire had gotten out of control it could have spread to the bunkhouse, office and other outbuildings. They had been lucky. Jonah headed to the sprawling ranch house. Entering through the back door, he walked quietly through spacious rooms where sunlight spilled across polished hardwood floors and over classic furniture. Even though he was moving his things in tomorrow, it was still difficult to realize this was all his.
The house was rustic, yet with state-of-the-art appliances and conveniences, and a collector’s elegance to its antique furniture. Jonah didn’t know much about antiques, but Kate had been into collecting and had taught him a little about styles she liked.
He was spending tonight at the ranch, but he wanted to return to town and buy a pair of boots. He also planned to get pictures developed from a disposable camera he’d picked up on the way, to send to his folks.
When Jonah drove back to San Antonio, he was certain he had made the right choice about his future. He had had the past two months to think about it, and he wanted to keep the Long Bar Ranch, welcomed the changes it would bring to his life.
After purchasing boots, he put the package in the car and stood on the sidewalk in the hot sunshine. Tomorrow morning, before he left for Midland, he was to have breakfast with Mike and Savannah. Right now it was two o’clock in the afternoon, and he wanted to develop the pictures he had taken of the ranch so he could show them to his family back home. He smiled to himself. The ranch seemed to be in excellent shape, with enough land and stock to make it one of Texas’s largest and most successful cattle ranches.
As soon as he had made his decision, he’d felt restless, impatient to get moved in. Would he be buried out on the ranch and become a hermit, as Boone Devlin had predicted? At the moment Jonah didn’t care. The Long Bar would give him a stable life, a purpose, and the work would be something he liked to do—a lot more interesting than struggling with a burning oil well.
Climbing into the rental car, he drove into the parking lot of a drugstore and went inside. After leaving his film to be developed, he roamed the aisles, picking up a magazine to read at the ranch tonight, getting a couple of candy bars and another disposable camera. Then he headed back to the front of the store with his purchases.
Walking up the aisle, Jonah could see the cash register where customers paid on their way out. There was a short line, and he glanced at the people waiting there. Suddenly he froze in shock.
A tall woman stood there. Her back was turned to him, but he knew her at once. Her thick mane of unruly chestnut hair was as unmistakable as her long legs and tiny waist. It was his ex-wife, Kate Valentini Whitewolf.
For a moment, time seemed to fall away, as he remembered hours he’d spent lying in bed with her, holding her in his arms. Kate, warm and soft, laughing up at him, and then the laughter changing as her eyes darkened with passion and she wrapped her slender arms around his neck, pulling him down to kiss him…
Jonah groaned and ran his hand across his eyes, bringing himself back to the present with a jolt. Kate was there—only yards away. She wore a denim skirt, a red cotton blouse, with sandals on her feet and bracelets on her arm.
His first impulse was to grab her elbow and turn her to face him. “Kate,” he whispered, aching all over. How he had loved her! Then he remembered the pain of her leaving him, and he knew he should look away, let her walk out of the store. Speaking to her wouldn’t do anything except stir up old hurts.
Why was she in San Antonio? Jonah wondered. It had been five years since he had last seen her.
Other memories flashed in his head. They had met when he’d been stationed at Fort Bragg, North Carolina, and she had lived in Fayetteville. It had been a hot July afternoon when she had swerved to avoid hitting a squirrel, and instead had run into his car.
Since they were in a residential area, neither of them had been going fast, and it had been a mere fender bender. But Jonah recalled her embarrassment and his amusement. The moment he had stepped out of his car and looked at her, his pulse had started galloping.
She had been wearing cutoffs, with her hair in a ponytail, and his first thought was that she was a kid. But then she’d gotten out of the car, revealing her long legs and tiny waist, her lush breasts, and he always wondered later if he had fallen in love right there during that first glance. While they exchanged insurance information, he’d made a date to take her out to dinner that night.
He had met her family and learned she was an only child and had few relatives, but the few she had all lived in Fayetteville. She’d had a successful job in advertising. Three months later, they were married.
It took only seconds for those memories to flash in Jonah’s mind as he stared at her. Then he noticed movement at her side. A small child was tugging on her hand, and she looked down and spoke to him.
Pain sliced into Jonah as if someone had stabbed him.
He had known that Kate would remarry. She was too beautiful, too appealing, too sexy to stay single for long. But the child was proof of her union, and it hurt to face the reality. The boy looked about four or five years old. He had straight black hair and skin darker than Kate’s, as if he had already been out in the sun a lot this spring.
Their divorce had taken place five years ago. She hadn’t wasted any time in finding someone else, Jonah thought bitterly.
As if drawn by a will stronger than his own, Jonah’s attention returned to Kate’s face. While he moved toward her, he argued with himself whether or not to say hello, mentally telling himself to walk on past, stay out of her way and keep her out of his. She was a married woman now, with her own life, just as Jonah had his. Why open old wounds?
A few more steps and he was beside her, and she turned and looked into his face.
The impact of gazing into her thickly lashed hazel eyes was another blow to his middle, one that stole his breath and made his pulse jump erratically. Those seductive green-gold eyes could change hue with passion, vary with different colors of clothing, sparkle with humor and melt with love. Big eyes, a wide mouth, prominent cheekbones…She was always more vivid and striking than anyone around her. Today gold-and-red earrings dangled from her ears, giving her a gypsy look that went with her wild cascade of hair.
“Hello, Kate,” he said quietly. It hurt, remembering the terrible pain of breaking up the marriage.
As she looked at him, her eyes widened, her jaw dropped and all color drained from her face.
He frowned and reached out to steady her, because she looked as if she might faint. She caught the counter edge and held it in a white-knuckled grip. He was amazed at her reaction. Could she be that unhappy to see him, in a chance encounter in a public place?
“Kate?”
“Hello, Jonah,” she whispered, and he could see her make an effort to pull herself together. She blinked, licked her lips and stared at him. If he had drawn a gun on her, he didn’t think she could have looked more terrified.
“Are you all right?” he asked, feeling upset by her reaction.
“Yes,” she answered. “I’m surprised to see you.” She was mumbling, barely loud enough to be heard. “We—we need to go,” she stammered.
When she started to turn away, Jonah knew she would walk out of his life again, which was what she wanted. And he had to let her go because long ago their lives had separated.
“Mommy,” the little boy said, tugging on her arm.
Jonah had forgotten the child, but looked down at him now. When their gazes met, Jonah felt as if he had smashed into a brick wall. His breath left his lungs and his pulse roared in his ears. The shock he had experienced inheriting a ranch and fortune was nothing compared to what he felt now.
He blinked and stared, looking into brown eyes as dark as an inky night. The hint of prominent cheekbones to come, the childish nose that already had a slightly hawkish shape…this was a face Jonah knew well, from his own childhood pictures.
There was a stunned silence while Jonah’s brain registered what he was seeing. He stared dumbly, his mind piecing together the truth.
Then his knees weakened, and he started to shake as he stared in disbelief, knowing he was looking at his own son.
Chapter 2
When Jonah looked at Kate, he saw the truth in her eyes and realized why she had been so stunned to see him. Throughout those years, he’d had a son, and she had kept that fact from him.
The truth and all its implications, plus his first reaction of riveting shock, began to transform his emotions.
A slow, burning fury started in the pit of his stomach and spread until he had to clench his fists and struggle to contain his rage. Never in his life had he yelled at a woman or touched one in any manner to cause hurt, but he wanted to shout at Kate now and he wanted to shake her. Instead, not trusting himself to speak, he held his temper and inhaled deeply.
Someone jostled him, and he realized they were partially blocking the aisle. He caught Kate’s arm, careful to not grip her tightly, knowing he had to keep a check on the anger boiling within him.
“Let’s get out of here,” he said through clenched teeth, turning toward the door and leaving the camera, candy and magazine behind.
She took the child’s hand and all three of them went outside into the hot sunshine. Jonah moved to the shade of a tree, away from the drugstore entrance. He dropped her arm and looked again at the child and then back to Kate.
“How old is he?”
“He’s four. In a few months, he’ll be five,” she replied, and Jonah flinched as if hit. Five years ago was when Kate had walked out.
“You knew when you left me,” he said, thinking about the divorce and the battles they’d had. “You knew, Kate! Dammit, how could you!”
“Please,” she whispered, “not here.”
He wanted to shout that they would talk here and now, but he had to think about his child. “We have to talk,” Jonah declared.
“I know that,” she answered, and glanced at their son. Jonah realized she didn’t want the little boy to overhear the conversation. “But not here and not now. This is my son, Henry,” she said. “Henry, meet…” Her voice trailed away. When words failed her and she looked stricken, Jonah realized she had been unprepared to ever cross paths with him.
“It’s Jonah,” he said to the boy, extending his hand.
Jonah took the small hand offered to him, wanting to pull the child into his arms and hug him. But he knew he couldn’t. It took great effort to keep from staring at Henry. Jonah scanned every inch of the little boy, memorizing forever the child’s straight black hair, slender frame and wide, thickly lashed eyes. His slightly full lips and that hawkish nose that had been passed down to nearly every male in Jonah’s family, and more than a few of the females.
“Hello, sir,” the boy said politely.
Jonah tried to smile as he released the child’s hand, but failed.
“I’m staying at a motel. I can give you my phone number—” Kate began, but Jonah shook his head. He wasn’t giving her a chance to disappear again.
“No, Kate,” he interrupted. “Let’s go to a park and talk right now. Henry can play while we talk. C’mon. I have a car.”
Wide-eyed, she stared at him and slowly nodded. “We have to get Henry’s booster seat from my car. I’d drive, but with the car packed with our belongings, there’s no room.” He linked her arm in his, trying to ignore the jump in his pulse when he touched her. She took Henry’s hand, and they got the booster seat and then walked to Jonah’s rental car, where Jonah held the door while she climbed inside. As soon as Jonah secured the booster seat, Henry got into the back and buckled himself in.
They drove in silence to the park, and Jonah wondered whether Henry was an extremely quiet, shy child or if he had picked up on his mother’s anxiety.
After they parked in the shade of an elm, the three of them walked to a wooden park bench that was close to swings and playground equipment. As Henry ran off to climb on a wooden structure, Jonah and Kate sat on the bench, leaving a wide space between them. As soon as they were settled, he turned to her.
Gazing at her profile, he realized she had changed. She was far thinner now, her skin drawn tightly over those prominent cheekbones. His gaze drifted down to her long, shapely legs, which stirred his desire even when he didn’t want them to.
“Are you married?” he asked bluntly, and she shook her head.
“No, I’m not.”
“Why didn’t you tell me about my son?” he demanded, still trying to control the fury that burned in him.
She turned to look at him, gazing steadily, with a lift of her chin. “It wouldn’t have mattered if I had told you. You wouldn’t have left Special Forces just because your wife was pregnant.”
“I had a right to know,” he said, each word clipped with suppressed anger that he struggled every second to control.
She flinched as if he had struck her. “I know you did,” she said, looking away and watching Henry. “But it would have made it harder to separate, and I wanted out of the marriage. And you had your life, the life you wanted more than anything else.”
“Don’t say that I wouldn’t have cared about my son,” he said tightly, clenching his fists again.
“I know you would have cared,” she stated quickly, “but it wouldn’t have changed anything.” She shook her head and sunlight caused golden glints in her thick brown hair.
“It might have, Kate.”
“You know it wouldn’t have!” she snapped, then bit her lip and looked away. Henry had climbed into a large sandbox and was digging in the sand, and both his parents stared at him.
“How could you keep silent? How could you keep my son from me?” Jonah asked, pulling on his earlobe.
“I know I shouldn’t have,” she replied in a tight voice.
“Damn straight you shouldn’t have!” he snapped. “It’s not just me you cheated, but his grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins, and Henry himself! Dammit, Kate!”
She turned, fire flashing in her eyes and color spilling into her cheeks. “We divorced! Even if you had known, I would have tried to get full custody, and since you were out of the country most of the time, I probably would have succeeded.”
“You don’t know that. Would you have kept him from his grandparents?” Jonah asked, thinking about how much his mother and dad loved their grandchildren.
Kate closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead.
“You cheated me out of knowing my son as a baby and a toddler. Not even a picture, Kate. No knowledge of his existence, and you never planned to tell me! Damnation!” Jonah swore in a deadly quiet voice. He was furious, hurt, close to rage, yet even so, he wanted to reach out and touch her. She still dazzled him, and that angered him even more.
“You didn’t want us!” she snapped, looking him in the eye defiantly. “Your military life was the most important thing to you!”
Jonah took a couple of deep breaths. His pulse was pounding and he felt hot. Standing, he jammed his fists into his pockets and walked a few steps, feeling a pent-up need to move while he tried to calm himself.
He knew he needed to think before he spoke, because every word between them was loaded and could explode into a fiery fight or disaster. He was angry with Kate, angry with himself for still finding her incredibly attractive. How could he want to kiss her when she had done such a terrible thing? Yet when he looked at her lips, all he could do was remember—even through a haze of fury.
“I’m out of the military now, and I want to know my son,” Jonah declared.
She caught her lip with her teeth, looking at Henry and frowning. “You’re going to hurt him.”
“Never,” Jonah replied emphatically. “Do you think knowing his father is going to hurt him?”
“No,” she admitted with a sigh. “I know you would never deliberately hurt any child, much less your own son.”
“What are you doing in San Antonio?” Jonah asked.
“I just got a job here,” she replied.
“Where are you staying?”
When she named a motel that was part of a low-priced chain, he looked more closely at her. Her purse was frayed, her sandals scuffed and worn. She wore a dime-store watch. He wondered what had happened, because when they had been married she had had an excellent job as an account executive with an advertising agency.
“Why did you leave North Carolina? Are your folks still there?”
She looked away and shook her head. “No. Both of my parents died—Dad died in January and Mom in April.”
“I’m sorry, Kate. Their deaths were close together and that’s rough. What happened to them?”
“They were terminally ill, both with heart trouble. After their deaths, I closed things up and found a job here, and we just arrived in town. I have to find a place to live and a day care for Henry.” She looked at Jonah. “So where do we go from here? Do you live here, too?”
“Yes. And I intend to get to know my son.” He glanced at Henry and then back at her, thinking of the future. “I’ll take you to court over this if I have to, Kate.”
She looked away, but not before he saw tears fill her eyes. Her tears didn’t diminish his anger, however.
“Don’t run away, either,” he added tersely. “I’ll find you. I can promise you that.”
“I won’t run. I suppose we’ll have to work out times and all that…. Have you remarried?” she asked, turning tostudy him.
“No, I haven’t.”
She shook her head and looked away again. Wind blew her long hair, and he could remember its softness when he’d wrapped his fingers in it.
“When do you start this new job?” he asked.
“Monday morning.”
Surprised, he arched his brows. “That leaves you just this weekend to find a place to live and a day care. That’s cutting it close.”
“I needed to start work as soon as possible.”
Jonah sat down again on the end of the bench and rested his elbows on his knees, watching Henry in the sandbox. The little boy was digging, carefully building a structure. Jonah’s thoughts seethed, and he tried to think calmly what to do next.
“Jonah, I should go,” Kate said, locking her fingers together tightly in her lap. “I can give you my phone number and the number of the place where I’ll be working, but right now, this afternoon, I should be looking for a place to stay. That’s what we’ve been doing all day today.”
She opened her purse and fumbled for a pen and paper. Jonah’s hand closed over hers and her gaze flew up to meet his.
“I’ll take you to dinner tonight and we can plan what we’ll do.”
“I don’t have any time before this job starts. Can we wait until I’ve had a week or two?”
“You’re going to tell him the truth today, right now—here at the park. Or else I will,” Jonah said in a voice of steel, a tone she had never heard before and knew she couldn’t argue with. “I don’t want to be cheated out of knowing my son one more minute.”
She rubbed her forehead again. “Please wait. I can’t deal with all this at once.”
“I’ve waited five damn years!” Jonah snapped. “I’m not waiting another moment.”
She nodded. “All right, Jonah. I guess you have that right.”
“Damn straight, I do. What have you told him about me—about us?” Jonah asked. “Did you tell him that we’re divorced?”
“Yes. I told him that the army was important to you and you were gone most of the time, and we decided it would be best to part. I told him you wanted out of the marriage.”
“Kate, that’s a damn lie!” Jonah said, standing again and pacing away from her, fury making him shake once more. He whipped around. “You’re the one who walked.”
“I know, but I was afraid he would keep hoping you would come back,” she explained.
The anger Jonah was keeping in check tore at him. He clenched and unclenched his fists and took deep breaths, knowing he needed to calm down.
“Children accept life as it comes to them,” Kate continued in a subdued voice, her words running together as she spoke quickly. “My parents were around the first couple of years. Dad wasn’t well the past three years, nor was Mom for the last two, but for a while Henry had a father substitute.” She turned to face Jonah squarely.
“It hasn’t been easy this past year. Mom and Dad were very ill, and I had to quit my job to take care of them. Since I couldn’t give a lot of attention to Henry, he’s learned to entertain himself, but he’s also a little shut off. He’s a solemn child and sensitive, and I think he picks up on what is going on around him. Don’t intimidate him.”
“I don’t intend to intimidate him, Kate. I want to love him,” Jonah said in a clipped tone while he looked at the little boy playing in the sand by himself. Other children ran around the playground together, but Henry kept to himself, and Jonah wondered how solitary the child’s life had been.
“You named him for your dad, didn’t you?” he asked.
“Yes. Henry Neighbor Whitewolf.”
“So you let him keep my name?” Jonah remarked in surprise. “And his middle name is my dad’s? Why did you do that, when you intended for Henry to never know his grandfather?”
“I thought someday I would take him to meet your folks, but then time began to pass and my parents got sick. I had a baby to care for and I just didn’t do anything about it. I never had a quarrel with your folks, Jonah.”
He gritted his teeth and shook his head, not trusting himself to speak. After a long silence, he said, “It was pretty shabby treatment, Kate, to keep the knowledge of their grandchild from them.”
She locked her fingers together. “I suppose you’re right, but if I had gone to see them or called or let them know in any way, you would have showed up and I was afraid of a custody battle.”
“Well, we need to talk about that one.”
She glanced at her watch. “I won’t run away. As of Monday morning, I’ll be an advertising executive for Beckman and Holloway, a San Antonio ad agency, and I’m really looking forward to it.”
“Sounds like a great job,” he said.
“I think it will be. It’ll pay more than the one I left.” She looked at Henry. “Right now, we haven’t had lunch, and I know Henry should eat. I need to try to find an apartment today, and I have an appointment this afternoon with a day care. Can we talk next week?”
“No. You’re not putting me off now. I’ll take you both to lunch.”
“You don’t need to do that,” she argued quietly. “I have a lunch packed in a cooler in my car. Jonah, be reasonable—we can talk tomorrow.”
Jonah shook his head. “Let’s go to lunch and talk. You can look at apartments later. Right now, I want to go tell him I’m his father. I’ve been out of his life for too long already.”
They stared at each other, and he could feel the muscles clenching in his jaw. He hurt as if every bone in his body were broken, ached with longing for the years he hadn’t known his child. Hot anger still consumed him, and to his chagrin, he still found his pulse racing every time he looked at Kate. He didn’t want her to have that power over him, but she did. He just hoped he never let his need for her show. When he thought what she had done, keeping Henry from him, he decided it would be better to keep his basic male reaction hidden from her.
He was astounded that she would try to keep his son a secret. That was a side of her he had never known.
“I’m going to tell him,” Jonah said, finally breaking the silence.
“No!” She gripped his arm and he inhaled, hating the hot tremor that sizzled through him from the touch of her fingers. She yanked her hand away as if she had touched burning metal. “I’ll go tell him right now,” she said, looking at Jonah intently, her gaze searching his features. “You’ve changed, Jonah. You’re a hard man.”
“You’ve changed, too, Kate. And what you did was—” He bit back the word he was about to say. It was over, and from this hour on, he would know his son and his son would know him. And in that moment, Jonah knew what he could do for the future.
“I’ll go tell him, but this is going to be sudden,” she repeated.
“I’m not the one who caused it to be that way. Go tell him.”
She clamped her lips shut, but nodded and turned away. He watched the slight sway of her hips and drew a deep breath. “Damn,” he whispered to himself. She was still beautiful and she could still stir him with a look or even the slightest physical contact. To him, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever known. He couldn’t see her any other way. Not even now, when he was so angry with her.
For too many reasons he ached as he watched her sit down in the grass near the sandbox and talk to Henry. Their son. Jonah couldn’t get over the knowledge. He had a son! Henry Neighbour, named for his dad and her father.
Jonah thought of his parents. His father would stoically say nothing about not being told about Henry all these years, but would simply pick up with the present. His mother would cry buckets over the lost years and pour out her love on this grandson, if Kate would let her.
Children’s laughter floated in the air, along with the whistles of birds. A faint breeze blew, and shadows shifted over him as Jonah sat waiting in the shade of a tall cottonwood tree. While he watched his ex-wife with their son, he thought of his future and the plans he had already made, and now what lay ahead and what he should do.
While Kate talked to Henry, the boy turned and stared at Jonah, who gazed back, aching inside. He wanted to go put his arms around his son and hug him. He longed to hold Henry. Five years and he had never yet held his child.
“Oh, dammit, Kate,” he whispered, and started walking toward them.
Henry got up and brushed off the sand, and Kate took his hand as they approached Jonah. The boy was slender, too quiet and withdrawn, yet there was absolutely no mistaking that Henry was his son, Jonah thought.
As he walked up to them, Kate and Henry stopped. Jonah kept his eyes on the boy, who watched him when he hunkered down in front of him. “I’m your dad, Henry.”
“Yes, sir,” Henry said quietly, frowning at him.
“I’m glad to see you and I want to get to know you.”
Nodding solemnly, Henry stared in silence at Jonah, who had held on to control long enough. He succumbed to impulse, reaching out to pick up Henry, standing and hugging the child, trying to hide the tears that stung his eyes.
“Henry,” he whispered.
The little boy’s arms wrapped around his neck, and Jonah gritted his teeth and squinted, fighting the knot in his throat and the hot tears that threatened to spill. He hadn’t cried since he was too young to remember, but it was all he could do now to hang on to his emotions. At the same time, he didn’t want to let go of Henry. He held his son in his arms, marveling at the miracle that had been given to him. A son. He had a son!
“I love you,” he whispered.
Reluctantly, he set Henry on his feet, knowing he might have been too emotional for the child. When all this was so new to Henry, Jonah had hoped to keep a lid on his feelings and slowly get acquainted with his son.
He glanced at Kate and she turned away quickly, but not before he glimpsed tears in her own eyes. “Come on, Henry. We have to eat lunch,” she said.
“Yes, ma’am,” he replied, falling into step beside her.
“I’m taking you to lunch, Henry,” Jonah said. “Where do you like to eat?”
The boy looked up questioningly at his mom. “If you insist, Jonah, let’s go to a cafeteria so he can eat some vegetables,” she said.
“Sure,” Jonah agreed. “Did you go to preschool, Henry?”
“No, sir,” he replied.
“He starts kindergarten this year,” Kate said.
Wondering about his son’s life, Jonah continued asking questions and getting yes or no for an answer. He held the car doors for Kate and Henry, noticing his ex-wife’s long, shapely legs when she slid into the vehicle.
At the cafeteria Henry stood in the line between them. Fighting the temptation to constantly touch him, as if to reassure himself that Henry was real, Jonah watched him, taking in everything he did, marveling at the child.
As they started through the line, Jonah leaned down to Henry’s level. “You get whatever you want to eat. Anything.”
Wide-eyed, Henry looked up at Kate, and she nodded, giving Jonah a searching look.
“I want that,” Henry replied, pointing to a bowl of bright blue cubes of gelatin.
Jonah couldn’t resist brushing Henry’s head lightly. When the boy turned to look up at him, Jonah smiled. Henry smiled in return and then his attention went back to the food spread before him. In minutes he had a tray filled with fried chicken, the gelatin, mashed potatoes and gravy. When he pointed to some corn, Kate spoke up.
“Henry, you have enough. You’ll never eat all of what you’ve taken.”
“Let him get it, Kate,” Jonah said quietly, and then he turned to Henry. “I told him to get whatever he wants and I don’t mind. If it’s all right with your mother, go ahead, Henry. Get the corn and whatever else you want.”
Kate looked at Jonah and then nodded to Henry, who took the dish of corn. Next, he wanted a fluffy white roll, and then chocolate cake.
They sat at a table by a window, where they could see across a grassy expanse to cars moving on the busy thoroughfare.
Henry cleaned up the bowl of gelatin first and then started on his fried chicken and mashed potatoes. While he ate, Jonah turned to Kate. “We need to work something out.”
She nodded and gave him a worried glance. “We’ll work out a schedule, but please understand, Jonah, I have to get settled and get him into a day care facility.”
“When are you moving your things from North Carolina?”
“There wasn’t much to move. I sold nearly everything before I left, and we’re sort of starting over now.”
Surprised, Jonah remembered the house he had shared with Kate, a comfortable three-bedroom home in a booming neighborhood. Kate’s parents’ house had been a desirable two-story in a pleasant, older suburb. In the divorce he had let Kate have the house and one car.
She kept her eyes down as she ate, and he studied her again, sure her clothing and jewelry were inexpensive.
“You sold both houses and you didn’t keep any furniture—not what we had or any of your folks’ things?” he asked, giving her close scrutiny.
“I kept a few little things, which I have in the car with me,” she replied, shaking her head.
“Kate, what happened?” he asked, puzzled by her answer. “Even if our possessions gave you bad memories, you loved your parents’ things. I can’t believe you let them go. What did you do with them?”
“I sold them,” she said, busily cutting a thick slice of roast beef. “This is a delicious lunch, Jonah.”
“So you don’t have furniture? Are you going to rent a furnished apartment?” he asked, surprised again, and realizing things must have gone really badly for her to sell both houses and all the furniture. Yet where had the money gone?
“Yes,” she admitted with obvious reluctance.
“Why, Kate? You had a rewarding job and your dad had his own business.”
“I’m sure you remember that Mom and Dad had the roller rink.”
“Sure, I remember. It was a thriving operation,” he replied.
“It was up until the time that we married, but it started slipping then. By the time we divorced, the neighborhood had changed and a bigger, newer rink was built in a better part of town. Instead of getting out, Dad held on. During that time he lost their health insurance because he couldn’t keep up the premiums. Finally he lost the business.”
“Sorry, Kate,” Jonah said tightly, still consumed by anger over Henry, and trying to listen as well as think ahead and make some plans. “What happened then?”
“Dad got a job selling furniture, but it wasn’t an adequate salary and he didn’t have benefits. Then he had a stroke.”
“Sorry,” Jonah repeated, remembering Kate’s father, with his bushy brown hair and his booming voice. The man had seemed so jovial and strong.
“Mom had a part-time job,” Kate continued. Jonah gazed into her wide, hazel eyes, his gaze lowering to her full, red lips. He didn’t want to look at her mouth or recall her kisses, but he did remember vividly, far too clearly. He caught the faint scent of her perfume. Memories from the past mixed with anger from the present, and he had to struggle to focus on what she was telling him.
“…but she had to quit to take care of Dad, and then suddenly I was taking care of both of them. They sold their house and moved in with me.”
“So why don’t you have your things? Surely you didn’t sell them, too.”
She nodded. “Yes, I did. I had to, because of their heart troubles. Without insurance, the medical bills were astronomical, and I had to quit my job to take care of them.”
“You have an aunt and uncle and cousins. Didn’t any of them help?”
“No, they didn’t,” she replied, shaking her head. “They have their own families to take care of. But I managed and didn’t have to go into debt, and I have some money saved for us to start out on. Also, I think I have a promising job lined up. This was a temporary setback, and we survived it.”
He gazed into her luminous eyes and knew if anyone could cope with tough times, it would be Kate. There was a practicality to her, enabling her to get to the essentials. He had always admired her for her ability to handle the tough moments, until the tough moment had been her decision to leave him. But then, that survivor instinct of hers might have been what caused her to walk out on him.
“I’m sorry about your folks,” he said, truly meaning it because he had liked her parents.
She nodded. “They were relatively young to have that all happen, although Dad was thirteen years older than Mom.”
“How’d you find the job here?” Jonah asked.
“Through the Internet.”
She wiped her mouth daintily, and he looked at her lips again for a moment, then tore his gaze away. He didn’t want to remember sexy nights and hot kisses and a myriad other seductive moments with Kate.
He watched Henry, who was steadily eating every bite of food in front of him. So was Kate, and Jonah wondered if they had been going hungry. Again he noticed how thin both of them were. Kate’s blouse looked a size too large.
If she had had a hard time, he was sorry, but it angered him to think that his son had been in dire straits. If she had only let Jonah know, Kate could have so easily avoided any hardships. As swiftly as he thought that about her, Jonah realized that Kate was independent enough to shoulder her own burdens and not expect help from others, much less from an ex-husband who didn’t know about their child.
“Who are your friends, Henry?” he asked, turning his attention to his son.
“Matthew and Billy,” the child answered.
While Jonah talked to Henry about his playmates back in North Carolina, Kate savored her potatoes and spinach. For the past few days, during the long drive to Texas from North Carolina, they had lived on peanut butter sandwiches and cold cuts and whatever else she could buy cheaply and pack in the car.
While he talked to Henry, she studied Jonah. He looked even more handsome than when they had been married. Tall, black-haired, with those midnight brown eyes that Henry had inherited, Jonah had an air of self-assurance and command that he hadn’t had before. Eyeing his navy knit sport shirt surreptitiously, she could tell he had filled out with solid muscle.
During their initial encounter in the drugstore, she had thought she would faint. Never had she expected to see Jonah in this part of Texas. She had always known she should tell him about his son, but it was easy to put off contacting him, and at first, anger at him got in the way. By the time they had parted, she had been furious with him for sticking to his wild lifestyle and staying in Special Forces, which trained him for dangerous assignments.
When she had walked out on him, she hadn’t known she was pregnant. She’d discovered that the first week she was on her own, but in her anger, she hadn’t wanted to tell Jonah or go back.
She had intended to tell him about his son eventually, but it got easier and easier to put it off. When she went through childbirth, Jonah was out of the country on an assignment, and by the time he was back home, she didn’t want to tell him at all.
Finally, enough time passed that she didn’t want to face his wrath or the complications he would cause. When their paths didn’t cross for a year, she’d begun to believe they might never cross again. When her parents both became terminally ill, she couldn’t think about anything except their care and looking after Henry. With her excellent job gone, times had been harsh and lean, because every penny went into caring for the three people dependent on her.
With a rush of warmth, she looked at Henry. He was a lovable little boy, an easy child to raise. She knew he was solemn and didn’t have the preschooling he should have had at this age, but he was bright and affectionate, and she loved him with all her heart.
Her gaze shifted to Jonah, noting that imperial nose, his prominent cheekbones and thickly lashed eyes. As her gaze drifted down to his mouth, she remembered too clearly moments of passion and how Jonah’s kisses could turn her to mush.
She was surprised he hadn’t remarried, but then, his career was his life, and it stood in the way of other commitments. Still, he was breathtakingly handsome, and a lot of women were drawn to men like Jonah. He had an old-world courtesy about him that females liked. Kate had been fully aware of the fury he had controlled today when he had learned about Henry.
Jonah had never lost his temper with her—not in their bickering about his career, not even in the last bitter argument when she had walked out on him. He had always kept his voice down, always kept his wits about him. But she had once seen him wade into a fight to save a slender guy who was being beaten by a gang of men, and Jonah had been wild and fierce and frightening. And he had ended the battle in seconds.
At the first sight of him today, she had hated how her pulse jumped. When he’d taken her arm to help her into the car, she had felt the contact to her toes. After all this time and even when she didn’t want to, she still responded instantly and totally to him.
She wondered if he was stationed in San Antonio now. Wondered if there was a regular woman in his life. She glanced at him again, to find his dark gaze on her, and as she looked quickly away, she tingled all over.
She was self-conscious about her clothes, which were old and worn, and she hated that she had had to reveal all her problems to him. If they were going to have this chance encounter, she wished it had been a month from now, after she had found a place to live and gotten her first paycheck from what promised to be an exciting job.
“Want some more water, Kate?” Jonah asked.
“Yes, please,” she answered politely, knowing they were both being courteous for Henry’s sake, and that every time Jonah looked at her, his dark eyes still blazed with anger.
She watched as he picked up the large pitcher with ease and filled her glass. She had always loved the shape of his strong hands, his blunt fingers with nails clipped short.
“Thanks,” she said, remembering his touch, knowing how his hands could take her to ecstasy. She looked away and tried to stop thinking about him, to stop memory piling on top of memory. But today had been a shock, one she’d been totally unprepared for.
“Would you like more milk, Henry?” Jonah asked.
“He’s fine—” she began, but when Henry nodded, Jonah got up to cross the room to the cafeteria line. Kate watched his long-legged stride. He was so broad-shouldered, his back tapering to a waist still as narrow as when they had married. He wore jeans and loafers, but she could remember Jonah naked, his warrior’s body fit and virile and breathtaking.
Stop thinking about him, she ordered herself. She looked away before he glanced back and caught her watching him.
He returned, opening the carton and pouring chocolate milk for Henry, who smiled up at him.
Guilt swamped her. It hurt to watch the two of them together, because she had not only cheated Jonah, she knew she had cheated her son. Henry deserved to know his father, whose only crime was to like his dangerous lifestyle and feel it was his mission to save people and help the world, even at his family’s expense.
She looked at her watch and then at Jonah, gazing into his eyes, which snapped with fury.
“I have an appointment in thirty minutes to view an apartment,” she reminded him.
“I’ve been thinking about that,” Jonah said. “I want to be able to see Henry.”
“We’ll work something out,” she assured him, rubbing her forehead. “This isn’t the time or place to do so,” she added, glancing at the child. She didn’t want to talk about visitation rights or custody battles in front of Henry, who, now that he had a full tummy, was beginning to turn his attention completely to Jonah. Henry’s big eyes were fixed on his newfound father, studying every inch of him, from the watch on his wrist to the loafers on his feet. Henry scanned Jonah’s features slowly, as if memorizing them.
“If we’re finished here, we can talk as we walk to the car,” Jonah suggested, standing and coming around to hold her chair.
She nodded, wanting to get rid of him before he saw her years-old vehicle, piled high with the only belongings they owned.
Stepping outside into the sunshine, they headed for Jonah’s car.
“If you’ll just take us back to the drugstore, my car is parked there,” she said. “You can give me your phone number. I don’t have one yet, but you know where I’ll work, and I can give you that number.”
“Kate,” Jonah said, taking her arm while Henry hopped on one foot ahead of them. “I think I have a temporary solution for you that would save you money and enable me to get to know my son.”
Feeling weak in the knees at his touch, she turned to face him. Even though she was five feet nine inches tall, she had to look up at him, because he was six-two.
“What are you referring to?” she asked.
“I just inherited a ranch. That’s why I’m here in San Antonio.”
“You’re going to live on a ranch?” she asked in disbelief. “You’re not in Special Forces?”
“No, I’m not,” he answered. “I got out of the military, and yes, I’m going to live on the ranch.”
“You won’t last six months,” Kate remarked swiftly, without thinking, “unless you’re raising and riding wild bulls. You like life on the wild side too much, Jonah.”
A muscle worked in his jaw, and she knew she had deepened his anger, but she had blurted the truth.
He watched Henry while he took deep breaths in an obvious struggle to get his temper under control. “I have a lot of room. Move into the ranch house with me. You can commute to work and I can get to know Henry.”
Stunned, she stared at him, caught unaware by an offer she had never dreamed of getting.
Chapter 3
“That’s crazy, Jonah! I’m not moving in with you!” she whispered, wanting to avoid Henry overhearing them. So far he seemed wrapped in his own world. She didn’t know if Jonah was propositioning her, or what he had in mind, but it was impossible.
“It’s a large ranch house,” Jonah said calmly, as if he were explaining the situation to Henry. “If we don’t want to, we don’t have to see each other. Living on my ranch would save you paying rent until you get your feet on the ground.”
“Jonah, I can’t imagine—” she began, but he interrupted her.
“Wouldn’t it help you to live rent-free for the next six or eight months?”
She thought of what that would be like—a gift, heavensent. An enormous break. At the same time, it would mean living with Jonah.
If she did, she might risk falling in love with him and being hurt all over again. She knew that because she was responding to him now. Yet, undoubtedly Jonah was in her life and would be until Henry was grown.
“Yes, it would help,” she murmured, possibilities spinning in her mind.
“If you’d like, I can take you out to look at the place. It’s furnished, and you and Henry can move in today. I’m staying out there tonight, and tomorrow I’m going home to get my things.”
“This is so sudden,” she said, rubbing her forehead. She wished she could choose a different course, but this was such a godsend for her.
“It’ll solve some of your problems,” he said, as if the matter was settled. “Cancel your appointment to look at that apartment, and let’s go to the ranch.” Jonah held out his cellular phone.
She looked up to meet his gaze. What was she doing? she wondered. Did he know what he was asking? The past hour had been strained, and Jonah was steeped in anger that she knew was going to last a long time. And this volatile chemistry between them—did he feel it, too, or was she the only one who would have to fight that magnetic attraction, as strong as it had been when they first met?
“Kate, you could save the money to get a better place,” he reminded her. “During the day I can keep Henry with me, and if we need to, I’ll hire a nanny. Henry is my son, and I want to do things for him.”
She was weak in the knees again. After all the responsibilities she had shouldered alone for the past five years, to have such an offer of help was overwhelming.
“I know you’ll be a great dad to him and a role model,” she said, convinced there was only one answer to give. Yet she felt an enormous reluctance. She didn’t want to rely on Jonah any more than she wanted to find herself loving him again. If she had ever been completely over him…
Kate didn’t want to think too much about that, either.
Bright sunshine spilled over him, highlighting his black hair. Looking relaxed, with his hands splayed on his narrow hips, he stood close enough that she could catch a faint scent of his woodsy aftershave. His jaw was clean-shaven. He was still dangerous to her heart, and she was sure that, ranch or no ranch, he was still as wild and impulsive as ever.
“Are you going to let Henry do risky things?”
Jonah looked at the boy, who was squatting down and watching a bug crawl along the edge of the sidewalk.
“Kate, you don’t have a right to ask me what I’m going to do. I can go to court and take him away from you for what you’ve done.”
She gasped, pain shooting through her because his words terrified her. At the same time, guilt swamped her, because to a degree, she knew he was right.
“And you think, under the circumstances, that we can stay under the same roof? I don’t think so, Jonah.”
“We won’t see much of each other at all. It’s a big house, as I said, and we can arrange it so we aren’t together.” He looked at Henry again. “And to answer your question, I won’t let him do anything beyond the ordinary kid stuff. He can climb a tree, dabble in the creek, learn to ride.”
“Horses?”
“Right, Kate. I’ll find a gentle one for him. I don’t want him hurt, either. Let’s go look at the place.”
Standing on the sidewalk, she stared into his brown eyes and debated with herself. Her life had just changed, but how big would the changes be? She wanted to tell Jonah no and walk away, as she had five years before, but this time she couldn’t. Because of Henry, her life was tied to Jonah’s now.
She sighed and nodded. “It would help a lot if I didn’t have to pay rent for a while.”
“All right. Let’s go.”
“Let me cancel my appointment,” she said, doing so quickly. As soon as she returned his phone, she said, “I can follow you in my car.”
Jonah shook his head. “Come with me, and we’ll stay there tonight,” he said, and in spite of the circumstances, his words made her tingle. “I’ll send someone into town to get your car.”
“Fine,” she said reluctantly, yet seeing little choice. Free rent would give her and Henry a wonderful financial boost.
“Henry,” Jonah said, raising his voice to normal level, “let’s go look at where you might live for a time. You and your mom might move into my house. It’s out in the country.”
Henry brightened and walked beside Jonah, and Kate moved to Henry’s other side so he was between them.
Jonah held the car doors for both of them again, and then she watched him walk around to the driver’s side. She didn’t want to live under the same roof with him. When they’d divorced, it had taken her forever to stop crying over him, but this seemed the only solution right now.
Jonah slid behind the wheel and in minutes they were driving along a freeway in San Antonio, while Henry asked questions about the ranch and Jonah answered.
“How did you inherit a ranch in the Hill Country?” she asked. “I thought all your family was up in the Panhandle.”
“I didn’t inherit from a relative,” Jonah replied. “It was a man whose life I helped save when he was a hostage—remember? The one in Colombia?”
She took a deep breath, because that assignment had been the last straw. That particular mission had sounded suicidal. At the time, she’d known that Jonah told her very little about what he had to do. Just enough for her to never expect to see him alive again when she kissed him goodbye. And that was when she had given him an ultimatum to choose between her or Special Forces. He had said he couldn’t quit the military.
“Although I’m glad you got something rewarding out of that,” she said, remembering too clearly, “I’m surprised you’re moving here.”
“I’ll see how I like ranching. I always liked it when I was a kid.”
“That’s different, Jonah. You didn’t have full responsibility.”
“Nope, but this ranch looks like a promising place for me to be.”
As they sped out of the city, heading north to the ranch, they rode in silence. For the first half hour, all Kate could do was think about the gift of no rent for the coming months, and what a wonderful help that would be to her finances. Her spirits lifted, and she tried to avoid contemplating living under the same roof with Jonah, or his fury, or the future. She wanted to bask in relief over the problems his offer solved for her.
The land was green from spring rains, and wildflowers still dotted the hillsides. At one point they reached barbed wire fencing that stretched into the distance. “This is the south boundary of my ranch,” Jonah said.
As she continued looking out at endless pastureland, she realized they were passing a lot of acres.
At last Jonah turned the car off the state highway onto a hard-packed dirt road, between tall stone posts. On one of the posts a sign held the Long Bar brand. Kate glanced back to see Henry sitting up, straining against his seat belt to see out the window when they bounced across a cattle guard.
She looked at the rolling hills and saw cattle grazing in the distance. She had imagined something on a much smaller scale, and when they topped a rise and she saw a sprawling ranch house and other buildings, her surprise grew. “Jonah, this operation is enormous. You inherited all of it?”
“Yes. It’s mine now, lock, stock and barrel.”
“What about the other guys in on the rescue? You didn’t go get the hostage single-handedly.”
“Nope. There were four of us back then. We lost Colin Garrick in the line of duty. Boone Devlin inherited a quarter-horse ranch, and Mike Remington inherited the house in town and the man’s baby daughter.”
“A baby? There weren’t any relatives?”
“Only John Frates’s in-laws. They were unfit for parenthood and are in a rehabilitation center now. Dina Frates’s father had been in prison, and both are alcoholics. They couldn’t take the baby.”
“Who cares for them?” Kate asked.
“They have a lifetime trust established for them by John. Savannah Remington is the attorney for it.”
“How sad about the grandparents,” Kate remarked. She was curious about the man they had rescued. “No wonder someone held him hostage, if he had this kind of money. What happened to Colin?” she asked, remembering a handsome guy full of life.
“He was killed on a mission,” Jonah answered, bringing back to her the seriousness of what he’d been involved in and what he had chosen over their marriage.
“Wasn’t Colin married?” she asked, thinking back and remembering the same woman with him each time she had seen him.
“Nope, engaged. They were planning on marrying. I heard she’s married someone else now.”
“I’m sorry. That’s sad. I don’t know how you got used to so much needless death, Jonah.”
“I don’t know that anyone ever does get used to it.”
“Oh, yes. You did, or you would have been too horrified to go back into that life. And you have all this now,” she said, still amazed.
“That’s right. I can keep it or I can sell it. I’ve thought it over and decided to keep it for a time and see how I like it. It’s a successful cattle ranch.”
Her head whipped around. “You won’t stay here long, because this will be much too quiet for you, too placid. I can’t imagine you doing this for more than six months or so.”
“We’ll see,” he said tightly. “Kate, my job was to do some good in the world, not to live dangerously. But that’s old territory, and there’s no need to go there now.”
“No, there’s not. How long have you been out?”
“Almost a year.”
“So what have you been doing?”
“Working for an oil company,” he replied, a muscle working in his jaw.
“Doing what for an oil company?” she persisted, wondering how much he had changed over the years, if at all.
“Fighting well fires,” he replied, and she shook her head. He hadn’t changed in the least. He had merely gone from one high-risk job to another. She looked again at the lush land surrounding them and the fantastic ranch house looming closer. She couldn’t imagine him staying out here, herding cattle and mending fences and keeping books. In a few months, he would be gone.
“Look, Mom, there are cows!”
“Yes, there are, Henry,” she replied as they neared a pasture where more Herefords grazed.
“There are horses, too, Henry. I’ll let you ride one this evening,” Jonah said.
“You will?”
Henry’s voice was filled with so much eagerness and anticipation that Kate looked back at him again. His eyes were wide and sparkling. “I get to ride a horse,” he said to her in awe, and she was saddened. Had she cheated Henry badly by keeping his father from him?
She had never thought about Jonah as being a super father, because she’d never thought about him being present enough to be any kind of a dad to a child. He had seemed so wrapped up in his military life that she had never expected him to be deeply interested in a family. Had she been wrong? And had she denied not only Jonah, but Henry as well?
“Look, there’s a barn!” Henry exclaimed.
Jonah took out a cell phone and called someone, and in seconds she realized he was talking to one of his ranch hands, telling him that he would be staying the night on the ranch and he had brought guests.
She listened as Henry bounced in the seat with excitement, and Jonah made arrangements for a gentle horse to be brought up to the corral.
She ran her hand across her head. This was a bonanza for her and for Henry in so many ways, yet at the same time she was putting her heart and her future in jeopardy. She looked at Jonah and drew a deep breath. Handsome, commanding, he was too many appealing things. If he turned out to be a loving, attentive father for Henry, she knew he would be just that much more irresistible to her. And she knew full well that he was still the same risk-taker he had always been, the same man who lived life on the edge and didn’t mind wading into a fight to help someone even when doing so put him in jeopardy.
When Jonah led them into a house large enough to be a mansion, Henry’s eyes were wide. He became quiet, and she was certain that he was awed by the enormous new home where they would live. She was a little awed herself.
“Wow! Mom, are we going to stay here?” he asked in his childish voice.
“Yes, you are,” Jonah answered before she could.
Her astonishment grew when they strolled into a large kitchen with a living area at one end of the room. Elegant glass-fronted oak cabinets, above a limestone floor and state-of-the-art, built-in appliances, looked wonderful to her. An adjoining eating area held a rectangular oak table and ten ladder-back chairs. A china vase filled with silk flowers was centered on the table. The house reflected the wealth of the previous owner, and she could hardly believe that it now belonged to Jonah.
“This is huge,” she exclaimed. “You’ll need a maid to keep it.”
“Actually, one comes with the place,” Jonah replied quietly.
“Jonah, this is fabulous! What an enormous inheritance.”
“Yeah, I was shocked, too, Kate. All we did was accomplish our mission.”
“You saved the man’s life.”
“That’s what I was supposed to do. All three of us have been in shock over our inheritance.”
Henry had gone to the window to look outside, so was out of earshot when Kate turned to Jonah. “You’re handsome and now you’re wealthy, Jonah. Women are going to be interested in you. Won’t we be in your way here?”
“Nope. If we need to make adjustments or other arrangements, we can,” he said, gazing steadily back at her. When he did, she could feel the air ignite between them.
In spite of all the arguments, their opposing views, his fury today and her determination to remain detached, the sparks were still there, as volatile and hot as ever. Her own gaze was locked onto his dark, enigmatic eyes. She couldn’t catch her breath or look away, and although she hated it, she had to admit that part of her wanted to throw her arms around him and kiss him endlessly.
At the same time, another part wanted to resist with every ounce of her being. She didn’t want to look at Jonah and be set ablaze with desire, or touch him and ignite a firestorm of longing. Yet there was no mistaking what she was caught up in and unable to stop any more than she could stop breathing.
It was obvious that he was feeling sparks, too, and fighting his emotions as much as she was, because a muscle worked in his jaw and his fists were clenched again. Breaking eye contact, he turned abruptly, and she let out her breath.
“How can we live under one roof?” she asked softly.
“Damn easily,” he snapped, turning back, and this time his eyes flashed with a different fire. She knew instinctively that anger was his protection from the sparks that danced between them, just as shock had been her barrier the first hour with him. Swiftly, her shock at seeing him was wearing off, now that he knew the truth concerning Henry, and she had no shield except logic and determination, which was a weak buffer against the appeal that Jonah held for her.
“All I have to do is look at my son and I know I want you here,” Jonah said. “You’re part of Henry. It would hurt him to be taken from you, Kate. If it didn’t hurt him, I wouldn’t hesitate.”
Jonah’s words cut into her like a knife, yet she knew she deserved them, and she could understand his hurt and anger. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
Henry walked around the room, looking at everything and then returning to Kate’s side. “This is a big house.”
“Yes, it is.”
“C’mon, Henry,” Jonah said, hoisting Henry to his shoulders. “I’ll show you around.”
Henry clung tightly to Jonah, and for an instant Kate wondered if he was frightened. But then she saw his grin and realized he liked being on Jonah’s shoulders. When he had been a toddler, her father had carried him that way. By the time Henry was three years old, her father hadn’t been able to do so, and Henry probably didn’t even remember that he ever had.
She saw that Henry was going to take to Jonah completely. Her son had missed having a father, and now not only was Jonah concerned about him, he could also enrich his life as well as become a role model for him.
She trailed after Jonah and Henry as they entered an opulent family room with rough, hand-hewn beams across the sixteen-foot-high ceiling. The furniture was dark wood, with the chairs and sofas covered in brown leather. The plank floor gleamed with polish, and a massive slate fireplace filled one end of the room. The pavilion-style space had a great view of a swimming pool and surrounding terrace.
“Oh, my!” Kate exclaimed, looking at the beautiful, sparkling water behind a black, wrought-iron grill. “I’m glad there’s a fence around the pool,” she said. “Henry doesn’t swim.”
“Don’t worry, Kate. He’ll be all right and the fence is sturdy,” Jonah said.
She turned her attention to the family room. “The house looks old, but they must have done it over in recent years,” she observed, gazing at a built-in entertainment center and a bar at one end of the room.
“It looks that way,” Jonah replied. “None of us knew John Frates very well, and our total knowledge of him involved his being a hostage.”
She crossed the room to a credenza. “Someone liked elegant antique furniture,” she said. “This period piece is beautiful.”
“The lawyer told me they had a decorator do the house. You can pick a bedroom, Kate, and select one for Henry. There are twelve bedrooms and eight bathrooms in this place—one bedroom downstairs and the rest upstairs. I’ve already decided to take the master bedroom.”
“That’s fine, Jonah. It doesn’t matter,” she replied. Only it did matter. She needed a bedroom a mile away from him.
He swung Henry to the floor and she watched the flex of taut muscles in his arms and back as his shirt stretched tightly across his shoulders.
“We’re going to live here, Mommy?” Henry asked in a subdued voice, and she wondered if he was overwhelmed by the house.
“Yes, we are for a while.”
He looked at the window. “There’s a swimming pool,” he said quietly, casting a worried glance at Jonah.
“Yes, and you’ll get to go in it sometime, when one of us is with you,” she said. “Right now, let’s look around the house so we’ll know where things are.”
He stayed close by her side as they went through a formal living room, and Jonah watched him, thinking he was too quiet for a little boy and wondering if his shyness was because of his new father’s presence.
The moment Kate stepped inside the living room, she gasped. “Look at this, Jonah! That looks like a marble Chippendale chimney piece. My word, I wonder where he got this and what it cost!” she exclaimed, crossing the room to look at the ornate mantel.
“You’d know more about that than I do,” Jonah remarked dryly, watching her hips sway, desire still burning in him in spite of all his efforts to fight it.
“What a magnificent armoire!” she exclaimed. She moved around the room, gushing over the furniture, while Jonah smoldered and watched her, his emotions warring. Anger and desire were tearing him apart. He didn’t want to feel either one, but he was consumed by both. Thinner, more pale, Kate still was the most beautiful woman he had ever known.
“Dammit,” he said softly under his breath. “Let’s look at the rest, Kate.”
She entered the dining room, which she found to be even more spectacular than the kitchen and family room. It was an immense space with another beamed ceiling, and fancy iron chandeliers that hung above a gleaming, dark wood table that could easily seat two dozen people.
Another mammoth stone fireplace filled one wall and crystal pieces sparkled in a tall breakfront on a credenza.
“That man didn’t have any relatives?” she asked, turning and catching Jonah looking at her in a manner that set her pulse fluttering again. Instantly, he walked away from her.
“His wife had a family, but her parents are in rehabilitation and not fit guardians. They are taken care of financially for their lifetimes. The property and the baby went to the three of us,” Jonah replied solemnly.
He motioned to her. “Down this way,” he said, “is a media room, a music room, a games room, a sunroom, a library. A portico connects the house to a cabana. In the cabana is a workout room.”
“Jonah, this house is going to take a fortune to maintain!” she exclaimed. “We ought to pay you to live here.”
“There’s no need to, Kate. I can manage it,” he said. “This is a highly profitable ranch.”
“You’re so fortunate and—” When she bit off her words, he turned to look at her, his brows arched in curiosity.
“And what?”
“You deserved to get this for risking your life to save his. It’s ironic that you saved him and then he came home and something happened to him.”
“John and Dina drowned off the coast of Scotland in a boating accident. It was their first trip on their own after their daughter’s birth and she was too small. The nanny looked after her.”
“They left the baby behind? That’s awful,” Kate exclaimed, and then caught Jonah staring at her with such anger that she bit her lip and turned away. He was probably thinking that it wasn’t as awful as what she had done, because they’d been killed accidentally, while she had kept Henry from him deliberately.
They looked at the house, selected bedrooms, and then Jonah told Henry he would take him to look at the barn and livestock. Before they left her, Jonah turned to Kate. “Give me your car keys and I’ll have someone fetch your vehicle.”
“It’s in the drugstore parking lot, one with North Carolina plates,” she said, giving him a description of her eleven-year-old car while she dug in her purse and pulled out keys, handing them to Jonah. When she did, their hands brushed—a slight contact, yet the touch was electric. He looked up into her eyes, and in that moment raw desire burned between them.
As she jerked her hand away, he turned abruptly. “Let’s go, Henry,” he said. Jonah glanced back at Kate. “I’ll put some steaks out to thaw. The kitchen and pantry looked fully stocked.”
“Fine,” she answered breathlessly, stunned by the intense reaction she was having after all these years, when she’d thought she had gotten over being responsive to him. “We had a big lunch and a late one,” she added. “Neither Henry nor I will be hungry for a while.”
“When I go home tomorrow to get my things, I want you and Henry to come with me so my folks and Henry can meet each other. I’ll get the plane tickets and then we’ll drive back here.”
She nodded, knowing she should let them meet, but her first thought was the long drive meant hours in the car with Jonah. She saw in her future that they would be thrown together constantly, and it was going to be a rocky time, if not impossible.
As father and son left the house, she watched them. It was an incredible turn of events in their lives, and she was still dazed by the sudden upheaval in her plans.
She turned back to the bedroom she had hastily chosen because it was next to a child’s room, one done in primary colors. She was thankful it wasn’t all in pink, since Jonah had told her the Frateses’ baby was a girl.
Anywhere under the same roof would be impossible to be far enough away from Jonah’s room to insulate her heart. As it was, his room was next to hers. He had a huge master bedroom that ran the length of the house on the side overlooking the pool and terrace. Each bedroom had its own balcony.
She looked at the skylighted room she had chosen and realized it was larger than any bedroom she had had before. It held a double bed that had a massive carved headboard she guessed was antique. A dresser and chest of drawers matched the bed, and a tall armoire stood on one side of the room. The green-and-white decor was cheerful in the afternoon sunlight spilling through wide windows. She was surrounded with luxury that she would have relished and enjoyed tremendously if it hadn’t included living with Jonah. Life with him would keep her constantly on edge.
Two hours later Henry returned, chattering, dusty and with sparkling eyes. Her car had been brought to the ranch and her things carried in by men who now worked for Jonah. She’d met them as they brought her suitcases up the stairs, then helped Jonah take a crib out of the nursery and put in a bed for Henry.
While the men worked, Kate ran a bath for her son and soon had him bathed and changed into his blue pajamas. She had found the pantry was fully stocked, as Jonah had promised, and she’d fixed an early supper for Henry, knowing he would be exhausted from the long day. While she didn’t want to eat alone with Jonah, Henry couldn’t last.
When they finished assembling the bed and she’d put clean sheets on it, she let Henry pick out two books from those that were unpacked.
“Can I read to him tonight?” Jonah asked from the doorway, and she turned to find him casually leaning against the jamb. How long had he been standing there watching her? she wondered.
“Yes. I’ll come tuck you in, Henry,” she said, leaving the room. At the doorway she looked back to see Jonah sitting in the rocking chair with Henry on his lap. The little boy settled in his father’s arms, and Kate suffered another pang for keeping the two separated. How long now would she have to live with guilt?
She hurried to her room to unpack some fresh clothes and shower.
Everything about Jonah was appealing, but she needed to constantly guard her heart and remember that this quiet country living would never last for him. To be happy Jonah had to be saving someone or handling some dangerous mission for his country. Getting out of Special Forces wouldn’t matter.
She changed into cutoffs and a blue T-shirt, twisting her hair up on her head in a butterfly clip and going back to see if they had finished reading.
As he read and rocked, Henry looked up at Jonah. “You’re my daddy? You’re going to stay? You’re not going to leave us?”
“No, Henry, I’m not going to leave you.”
“Daddy,” Henry said, running his tiny fingers along Jonah’s jaw. Jonah’s heart turned over. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“I’m glad, too, Henry,” he said in a husky voice as a rush of feeling choked him. He tightened his arms slightly around his son and continued reading, hoping Henry didn’t notice that he was getting emotional.
In minutes the boy was asleep. Jonah studied him, touching strands of his hair lightly, marveling in the child’s perfection. Filled with love and awe, Jonah picked up Henry, carrying him to the new bed and putting him down gently.
Then he stood beside the bed. Jonah was fascinated with every facet of Henry, noticing his son’s long lashes, his smooth brown skin, his small hands. He leaned down to brush a kiss on Henry’s forehead.
“I love you, Henry, and will thank God every day that I found you,” he whispered. He straightened and turned to discover Kate only yards away behind him, standing immobile with sadness in her eyes. She turned abruptly and left the room ahead of him.
When he found her waiting at the foot of the stairs, his anger soared, now that Henry was no longer around to witness his wrath. His gaze raked over her.
She was in cutoffs and she looked prettier than ever. There was something sultry and earthy about Kate, and the qualities had intensified in the last few years. Strands of her hair fell loose from the clip that held it pinned on her head. She always looked slightly thrown together, creating a casual, sultry air that had not changed with time.
When they entered the kitchen, she crossed the room. “What can I do to help with dinner?” she asked.
“I’ll grill the steaks, and while we eat, I want you to tell me about Henry. Do you have a baby book for him?”
“Yes, I do,” she answered.
“Fine,” Jonah replied as he got greens for salad from the refrigerator. “I’ll take care of the cooking. You go unpack his baby book so I can see it.”
“Jonah, if we’re tense and angry, he’s going to pick up on it soon,” Kate said. “You can’t pretend to be friendly with me one minute and then seethe with anger the next.”
“I figure the anger will go soon, because he’s here in my life now, and I’m damn thankful for that. Just overlook the anger, or live with it the way I lived with yours when we were married.”
She caught her breath and turned and left the room.
He swore silently and watched her walk away, mentally stripping away the cutoffs, looking at her long, bare legs and wanting her in spite of all she had done. He clamped his teeth so tightly they hurt, then turned to get a cold beer and start dinner.
Before they sat down to eat thick, juicy steaks on the patio, Jonah switched on the intercom.
“I want the device on,” Kate said, “but Henry sleeps like someone who has lost consciousness. He’s out until eight o’clock in the morning. No nightmares or wanting a drink or wanting me in the middle of the night.”
“Well, if the unusual should happen, we’ll hear him. Now tell me about him—everything, Kate.”
She talked while they ate their steaks, a tossed salad and potatoes baked in a microwave oven. A cool breeze blew across the terrace, and she gazed over the turquoise swimming pool. Beyond the well-tended yard was a grand view of rolling hills, green pastures and, in the distance, a silvery pond. The Long Bar Ranch was a paradise—or could be, she thought, and she knew that when the time came, it was going to be difficult to move Henry away from here. She didn’t want to think about that now. For the moment, they were here, and when she wasn’t tied in knots by Jonah, she could enjoy the ranch, which was going to be so wonderful for Henry.
After dinner, at dusk, they cleared the table and then she spread out the baby book and scrapbooks. Jonah pulled his chair up beside her there.
Her skin tingled all over with awareness of him—his arm brushing against her, his fingers touching hers as they began to look, starting with pictures of Henry at the hospital where he had been born.
“Look at the thick black hair on him even as a baby!” Jonah exclaimed, staring at each picture with a joy that saddened her and heightened her guilt.
“Well, you and I both have thick hair,” Kate said, and Jonah looked at her locks, picking up a handful in his grasp.
“Yes, you do,” he agreed.
They sat side by side, his hand in her hair now and his face only inches away. His fingers had brushed her nape and his fist rested against her head, slight touches that were like dynamite near the flames of impossible desire. His dark eyes were momentarily free of anger and the only emotion smoldering in their depths was longing.
Once again her gaze locked with his. She couldn’t move away, look away or even draw a breath.
While her heart thudded, she licked her dry lips. Why did he have this effect on her? Why had he always been so irresistible? Right now, in spite of all that was between them, she wanted to close that small distance between them and kiss him. She wanted him to wrap his arms around her and kiss her back. At the same time, she didn’t want his kisses and never wanted to walk into his arms again, because it could only lead one direction—to more hurt than she had known before.
“Dammit, Kate,” he whispered.
“I told you we couldn’t live here together, Jonah! You were warned and you didn’t pay any attention. Neither one of us wants to feel what we do,” she said, unable to tear her eyes from his.
She started to get up to walk away from him. He did the same and they bumped against each other, shoulder to shoulder, hip against hip. He reached to steady her and then they looked into each other’s eyes once more.
This time desire was an explosion between them, and longing was palpable. His dark eyes consumed her, and she could only tremble with need.
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