The Lying Game
The Lying Game
Sara Shepard
From the author of the New York Times bestselling PRETTY LITTLE LIARS comes a killer series, THE LYING GAME.Sutton Mercer had a life anyone would kill for – and someone did. But thanks to a view from the afterlife and Emma Paxton, her long-lost twin sister, Sutton has a chance to solve her own murder. Emma slips into Sutton’s old life to piece together her disappearance. But can Emma keep up the charade long enough to discover what really happened to Sutton…or will she become the next victim?Let the lying games begin.
THE
LYING
GAME
BY
SARA
SHEPARD
We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.
—KURT VONNEGUT
Contents
Cover (#u64adf709-1f71-5ac1-8207-94b16b68cd5e)
Title Page (#u90b90dd2-c65b-5c1b-a52c-9e0c7df5974e)
Epigraph (#u870eb88e-cee9-5f66-a2d3-4d101af68b2c)
PROLOGUE
Chapter 1 - THE DEAD RINGER
Chapter 2 - THAT’S RIGHT, BLAME THE FOSTER KID
Chapter 3 - YOU KNOW IT’S TRUE IF YOU READ IT ON FACEBOOK
Chapter 4 - REUNION INTERRUPTED
Chapter 5 - SHE IS ME
Chapter 6 - WHO CAN RESIST A BROODER?
Chapter 7 - THE BEDROOM EMMA NEVER HAD
Chapter 8 - COFFEE, MUFFINS, MISTAKEN IDENTITY . . .
Chapter 9 - IMITATION IS THE HIGHEST FORM OF FLATTERY
Chapter 10 - EVERY GUY LOVES A FELON
Chapter 11 - WATCH OUT FOR DEVIL CHILD!
Chapter 12 - EMMA’S FIRST FAMILY DINNER DYSFUNCTION
Chapter 13 - THE BODY ON THE GROUND
Chapter 14 - VINTAGE EMMA
Chapter 15 - THE SCENE OF THE CRIME
Chapter 16 - LAST BUS TO VEGAS
Chapter 17 - NEVER HAVE I EVER
Chapter 18 - WHO’S LAUGHING NOW?
Chapter 19 - LEAVING IS NOT AN OPTION
Chapter 20 - DEAR DIARY, TODAY I DIED
Chapter 21 - UNREQUITED SPYING
Chapter 22 - DIRTY SECRETS
Chapter 23 - SOMEONE WAS A VERY, VERY BAD GIRL . . .
Chapter 24 - DOESN’T EVERY GIRL THINK HER SISTER WANTS TO KILL HER?
Chapter 25 - A LATE ADDITION TO THE GUEST LIST
Chapter 26 - A FACE FROM THE PAST
Chapter 27 - HAPPY BIRTHDAY, NOW DIE
Chapter 28 - SEDUCTION AND MURDER ALWAYS GO HAND IN HAND
Chapter 29 - THE GREAT ESCAPE
Chapter 30 - SOMEONE KNOWS . . .
Chapter 31 - NOT FUNNY, BITCHES
Chapter 32 - THE BITTER TRUTH
Chapter 33 - LOOK OUT, SUTTON’S BACK
EPILOGUE
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Also by Sara Shepard
Copyright
About the Publisher (#litres_trial_promo)
PROLOGUE
I woke up in a dingy claw-foot bathtub in an unfamiliar pink-tiled bathroom. A stack of Maxims sat next to the toilet, green toothpaste globbed in the sink, and white drips streaked the mirror. The window showed a dark sky and a full moon. What day of the week was it? Where was I? A frat house at the U of A? Someone’s apartment? I could barely remember that my name was Sutton Mercer, or that I lived in the foothills of Tucson, Arizona. I had no idea where my purse was, and I didn’t have a clue where I’d parked my car. Actually, what kind of car did I drive? Had someone slipped me something?
“Emma?” a guy’s voice called from another room. “You home?”
“I’m busy!” called a voice close by.
A tall, thin girl opened the bathroom door, her tangled dark hair hanging in her face. “Hey!” I leapt to my feet. “Someone’s in here already!” My body felt tingly, as if it had fallen asleep. When I looked down, it seemed like I was flickering on and off, like I was under a strobe light. Freaky. Someone definitely slipped me something.
The girl didn’t seem to hear me. She stumbled forward, her face covered in shadows.
“Hello?” I cried, climbing out of the tub. She didn’t look over. “Are you deaf?” Nothing. She pumped a bottle of lavender-scented lotion and rubbed it on her arms.
The door flung open again, and a snub-nosed, unshaven teenage guy burst in. “Oh.” His gaze flew to the girl’s tight-fitting T-shirt, which said NEW YORK NEW YORK ROLLER COASTER on the front. “I didn’t know you were in here, Emma.”
“That’s maybe why the door was closed?” Emma pushed him out and slammed it shut. She turned back to the mirror. I stood right behind her. “Hey!” I cried again.
Finally, she looked up. My eyes darted to the mirror to meet her gaze. But when I looked into the glass, I screamed.
Because Emma looked exactly like me.
And I wasn’t there.
Emma turned and walked out of the bathroom, and I followed as if something was yanking me along behind her. Who was this girl? Why did we look the same? Why was I invisible? And why couldn’t I remember, well, anything? The wrong memories snapped into aching, nostalgic focus—the glittering sunset over the Catalinas, the smell of the lemon trees in my backyard in the morning, the feel of cashmere slippers on my toes. But other things, the most important things, had become muffled and fuzzy, as if I’d lived my whole life underwater. I saw vague shapes, but I couldn’t make out what they were. I couldn’t remember what I’d done for any summer vacations, who my first kiss had been with, or what it felt like to feel the sun on my face or dance to my favorite song. What was my favorite song? And even worse, every second that passed, things got fuzzier and fuzzier. Like they were disappearing.
Like I was disappearing.
But then I concentrated really hard and I heard a muffled scream. And suddenly it was like I was somewhere else. I felt pain shooting through my body, before a final, sleepy sensation of my muscles surrendering. As my eyes slowly closed, I saw a blurry, shadowy figure standing over me.
“Oh my God,” I whispered.
No wonder Emma didn’t see me. No wonder I wasn’t in the mirror. I wasn’t really here.
I was dead.
Chapter 1
THE DEAD RINGER
Emma Paxton carried her canvas tote and a glass of iced tea out the back door of her new foster family’s home on the outskirts of Las Vegas. Cars swished and grumbled on the nearby expressway, and the air smelled heavily of exhaust and the local water treatment plant. The only decorations in the backyard were dusty free weights, a rusted bug zapper, and kitschy terra-cotta statues.
It was a far cry from my backyard in Tucson, which was desert-landscaped to perfection and had a wooden swing set I used to pretend was a castle. Like I said, it was weird and random which details I still remembered and which ones had evaporated away. For the last hour, I’d been following Emma trying to make sense of her life and willing myself to remember my own. Not like I had a choice. Everywhere she went, I went. I wasn’t entirely sure how I knew these things about Emma, either—they just appeared in my head as I watched her, like a text message popping up in an inbox. I knew the details of her life better than I did my own.
Emma dropped the tote on the faux wrought-iron patio table, plopped down in a plastic lawn chair, and craned her neck upward. The only nice thing about this patio was that it faced away from the casinos, offering a large swath of clear, uninterrupted sky. The moon dangled halfway up the horizon, a bloated alabaster wafer. Emma’s gaze drifted to two bright, familiar stars to the east. At nine years old, Emma had wistfully named the star on the right the Mom Star, the star on the left the Dad Star, and the smaller, brightly twinkling spot just below them the Emma Star. She’d made up all kinds of fairy tales about these stars, pretending that they were her real family and that one day they’d all be reunited on earth like they were in the sky.
Emma had been in foster care for most of her life. She’d never met her dad, but she remembered her mother, with whom she had lived until she was five years old. Her mom’s name was Becky. She was a slender woman who loved shouting out the answers to Wheel of Fortune, dancing around the living room to Michael Jackson songs, and reading tabloids that ran stories like BABY BORN FROM PUMPKIN! and BAT BOY LIVES! Becky used to send Emma on scavenger hunts around their apartment complex, the prize always being a tube of used lipstick or a mini Snickers. She bought Emma frilly tutus and lacy dresses from Goodwill for dress-up. She read Emma Harry Potter before bed, making up different voices for every character.
But Becky was like a scratch-off lottery ticket—Emma never quite knew what she was going to get with her. Sometimes Becky spent the whole day crying on the couch, her face contorted and her cheeks streaked with tears. Other times she would drag Emma to the nearest department store and buy her two of everything. “Why do I need two pairs of the same shoes?” Emma would ask. A faraway look would come over Becky’s face. “In case the first pair gets dirty, Emmy.”
Becky could be very forgetful, too—like the time she left Emma at a Circle K. Suddenly unable to breathe, Emma had watched her mother’s car vanish down the shimmering highway. The clerk on duty gave Emma an orange Popsicle and let her sit on the ice freezer at the front of the store while he made some phone calls. When Becky finally returned, she scooped up Emma and gave her a huge hug. For once, she didn’t even complain when Emma dripped sticky orange Popsicle goo on her dress.
One summer night not long after that, Emma slept over with Sasha Morgan, a friend from kindergarten. She woke up in the morning to Mrs. Morgan standing in the doorway, a sick look on her face. Apparently, Becky had left a note under the Morgans’ front door, saying she’d “gone on a little trip.” Some trip that was—it had lasted almost thirteen years and counting.
When no one could track down Becky, Sasha’s parents turned Emma over to an orphanage in Reno. Prospective adopters had no interest in a five-year-old—they all wanted babies they could mold into mini versions of themselves—so Emma lived in group homes, then foster homes. Though Emma would always love her mom, she couldn’t say she missed her—at least not Miserable Becky, Manic Becky, or the Lunatic Becky who’d forgotten her at the Circle K. She did miss the idea of a mom though: someone stable and constant who knew her past, looked forward to her future, and loved her unconditionally. Emma had invented the Mom, Dad, and Emma stars in the sky not based on anything she’d ever known, but instead on what she wished she’d had.
The sliding glass door opened, and Emma wheeled around. Travis, her new foster mom’s eighteen-year-old son, strutted out and settled on top of the patio table. “Sorry about bursting in on you in the bathroom,” he said.
“It’s okay,” Emma muttered bitterly, slowly inching away from Travis’s outstretched legs. She was pretty sure Travis wasn’t sorry. He practically made a sport of trying to see her naked. Today, Travis wore a blue ball cap pulled low over his eyes, a ratty, oversized plaid shirt, and baggy jean shorts with the crotch sagging almost to his knees. There was patchy stubble on his pointy-nosed, thin-lipped, pea-eyed face; he wasn’t man enough to actually grow facial hair. His bloodshot brown eyes narrowed lasciviously. Emma could feel his gaze on her, canvassing her tight-fitting NEW YORK NEW YORK camisole, bare, tanned arms, and long legs.
With a grunt, Travis reached into his shirt pocket, pulled out a joint, and lit up. As he blew a plume of smoke in her direction, the bug zapper glowed to life. With a crisp snap and a fizzle of blue light, it annihilated yet another mosquito. If only it could do that to Travis, too.
Back off, pot breath, Emma wanted to say. It’s no wonder no girl will get near you. But she bit her tongue; the comment would have to go into her Comebacks I Should’ve Said file, a list she’d compiled in a black cloth notebook hidden in her top drawer. The Comebacks list, CISS for short, was filled with pithy, snarky remarks Emma had longed to say to foster moms, creepy neighbors, bitchy girls at school, and a whole host of others. For the most part, Emma held her tongue—it was easier to keep quiet, not make trouble, and become whatever type of girl a situation needed her to be. Along the way, Emma had picked up some pretty impressive coping skills: At age ten, she honed her reflexes when Mr. Smythe, a tempestuous foster parent, got into one of his object-throwing moods. When Emma lived in Henderson with Ursula and Steve, the two hippies who grew their own food but were clueless about how to cook it, Emma had begrudgingly taken over kitchen duties, whipping up zucchini bread, veggie gratins, and some awesome stir-fries.
It had been just two months since Emma had moved in with Clarice, a single mom who worked as a bartender for VIP gamblers at The M Resort. Since then, Emma had spent the summer taking pictures, playing marathon games of Minesweeper on the banged-up BlackBerry her friend Alex had given her before she’d left her last foster home in Henderson, and working part-time operating the roller coaster at the New York New York casino. And, oh yeah, avoiding Travis as much as she could.
It hadn’t started out that way, though. At first, Emma had tried to make nice with her new foster brother, hoping they could be friends. It wasn’t like every foster family sucked and she’d never made friends with the other kids; it just sometimes took a lot of effort on her part. She’d feigned interest in all of the YouTube videos Travis watched about how to be a small-time thug: how to unlock a car with a cell phone, how to hack soda machines, how to open a padlock with a beer can. She’d suffered through a couple of Ultimate Fighting Championship matches on TV, even attempting to learn the wrestling-move vocabulary. But the nicety had ended for Emma a week later, when Travis tried to feel her up while she was standing in front of the open fridge. “You’ve been so friendly,” he’d murmured in her ear, before Emma had “accidentally” kicked him in the crotch.
All Emma wanted to do was get through her senior year here. It was the end of August, and school started on Wednesday. She had the option of leaving Clarice’s when she turned eighteen in two weeks, but that would mean quitting school, finding an apartment, and getting a full-time job to pay rent. Clarice had told Emma’s social worker that Emma could stay here until she got her diploma. Nine more months, Emma chanted to herself like a mantra. She could hold on until then, couldn’t she?
Travis took another hit off the joint. “You want some?” he asked in a choked voice, holding the smoke in his lungs.
“No thanks,” Emma said stiffly.
Travis finally exhaled. “Sweet little Emma,” he said in a syrupy voice. “But you aren’t always this good, are you?”
Emma craned her neck up at the sky and paused on the Mom, Dad, and Emma stars again. Farther down the horizon was a star she’d recently named the Boyfriend Star. It seemed to be hovering closer than usual to the Emma Star tonight—maybe it was a sign. Perhaps this would be the year she’d meet her perfect boyfriend, someone she was destined to be with.
“Shit,” Travis whispered suddenly, noticing something inside the house. He quickly stubbed out the joint and threw it under Emma’s chair just as Clarice appeared on the back deck. Emma scowled at the joint’s smoldering tip—nice of Travis to try to pin it on her—and covered it with her shoe.
Clarice still had on her work uniform: a tuxedo jacket, silky white shirt, and black bow tie. Her dyed blond hair was slicked into an impeccable French twist, and her mouth was smeared with bright fuchsia lipstick that didn’t flatter anyone’s skin tone. She held a white envelope in her hands.
“I’m missing two hundred and fifty dollars,” Clarice announced flatly. The empty envelope crinkled. “It was a personal tip from Bruce Willis. He signed one of the bills. I was going to put it in my scrapbook.”
Emma sighed sympathetically. The only thing she’d gleaned about Clarice was that she was absolutely obsessed with celebrities. She kept a scrapbook describing every celeb interaction she’d ever had, and glossy signed head shots lined the wall space in the breakfast nook. Occasionally, Clarice and Emma ran into each other in the kitchen around noon, which was the crack of dawn for Clarice after a bar shift. The only thing Clarice ever wanted to talk about was how she’d had a long conversation with the latest winner of American Idol the night before, or how a certain action film starlet’s boobs were definitely fake, or how the host of a dating reality show was kind of a bitch. Emma was always intrigued. She didn’t care much about celebrity dirt but dreamed of someday being an investigative journalist. Not that she ever told Clarice that. Not that Clarice had ever asked anything personal about her.
“The money was in this envelope in my bedroom when I left for work this afternoon.” Clarice stared straight at Emma, her eyes squinting. “Now it’s not. Is there something you want to tell me?”
Emma sneaked a peek at Travis, but he was fiddling with his BlackBerry. As he scrolled through his photos, Emma noticed a blurry shot of her at the bathroom mirror. Her hair was wet, and she’d knotted a towel under her arms.
Cheeks burning, Emma turned to Clarice. “I don’t know anything about it,” she said in the most diplomatic voice she could muster. “But maybe you should ask Travis. He might know.”
“Excuse me?” Travis’s voice cracked. “I didn’t take any money.”
Emma made an incredulous noise at the back of her throat.
“You know I wouldn’t do that, Mom,” Travis went on. He stood and pulled up his shorts around his waist. “I know how hard you work. I did see Emma go into your room today though.”
“What?” Emma whirled around to face him. “I did not!”
“Did too,” Travis shot back. As soon as he turned his back on his mom, his expression morphed from a fake smile to a wrinkled-nose, narrowed-eyes glower.
Emma gaped. It was amazing how calmly he lied. “I’ve seen you go through your mom’s purse,” she announced.
Clarice leaned against the table, twisting her mouth to the right. “Travis did that?”
“No, I didn’t.” Travis pointed accusingly at Emma. “Why would you believe her? You don’t even know this girl.”
“I don’t need money!” Emma pressed her hands to her chest. “I have a job! I’m fine!” She’d been working for years. Before the roller coaster, she’d had a job as Head Goat Girl at a local petting zoo, she’d dressed up as a toga-robed Statue of Liberty and stood on the street corner to advertise a local credit union, and she’d even sold knives door-to-door. She’d saved more than two grand and stashed it in a half-empty Tampax box in her bedroom. Travis hadn’t found the money yet, probably because the tampons were a better security system against creepy boys than a rabid pack of Rottweilers.
Clarice gazed at Travis, who was giving her a sickening, pouty smile. As she creased the empty envelope back and forth in her hands, a suspicious look crossed her face. It looked as if she momentarily saw through Travis’s facade.
“Look.” Travis walked over to his mom and put his arm on her shoulder. “I think you need to know what Emma’s really all about.” He pulled his BlackBerry from his pocket again and began to fiddle with the click wheel.
“What do you mean?” Emma walked over to them.
Travis gave her a sanctimonious look, hiding the BlackBerry screen from view. “I was going to talk to you about this in private. But it’s too late for that now.”
“Talk to me about what?” Emma lunged forward, making the citronella candle in the center of the table wobble.
“You know what.” Travis tapped away on the keyboard with his thumbs. A mosquito buzzed around his head, but he didn’t bother to flick it away. “You’re a sick freak.”
“What do you mean, Travis?” Clarice’s fuchsia-lined lips pursed worriedly.
Finally, Travis lowered the BlackBerry so everyone could see. “This,” he announced.
A stiff, hot wind blew against Emma’s cheek, the dusty air irritating her eyes. The blue-black evening sky seemed to darken a few shades. Travis breathed heavily next to her, reeking of pot smoke, and pulled up a generic video uploading site. With a flourish, he typed in the keyword SuttonInAZ and hit PLAY.
A video slowly loaded. A handheld camera panned over a clearing. No sound escaped from the speakers, as if the microphone had been muted. The camera whipped around to show a figure sitting in a chair with a black blindfold covering half her face. A round silver locket on a thick chain clung to a bony, feminine collarbone.
The girl thrashed her head frantically back and forth, the locket bouncing wildly. The picture went dark for a moment, and suddenly someone slipped behind her and pulled the necklace chain back so that it pressed up against the girl’s throat. The girl’s head arched back. She flailed her arms and kicked her legs.
“Oh my God.” Clarice’s hand flew to her mouth.
“What is this?” Emma whispered.
The strangler pulled the chain harder and harder. Whoever it was had a mask over his head, so Emma couldn’t see his face. After about thirty seconds, the girl in the video stopped struggling and went limp.
Emma backed away from the screen. Had they just watched someone die? What the hell? And what did this have to do with her?
The camera remained fixed on the blindfolded girl. She wasn’t moving. Then the picture went momentarily dark again. When an image snapped back on the screen, the camera was tilted over, fallen on the ground. Emma could still see a sideways shot of the figure in the chair. Someone walked up to the girl and pulled the blindfold off her head. After a long pause, the girl coughed. Tears dotted her eyes. The corners of her mouth pulled down. She blinked slowly. For a split second before the screen went dark, she stared half consciously into the lens.
Emma’s jaw dropped to her worn Converse sneakers.
Clarice gasped loudly.
“Ha,” Travis said triumphantly. “I told you.”
Emma stared at the girl’s huge, blue eyes, slightly upturned nose, and round face. She looked exactly like her.
That was because the girl in the video was me.
Chapter 2
THAT’S RIGHT, BLAME THE FOSTER KID
Emma grabbed the phone from Travis’s hands and started the clip over, staring hard at the image. As the person reached out and began to choke the blindfolded girl, fear streaked through Emma’s stomach. When the anonymous hand pulled off the blindfold, Emma’s identical face appeared on the screen. Emma had the same thick, wavy, chestnut-brown hair as the girl in the movie. The same round chin. The same pink lips kids used to tease Emma about, saying they were puffy as though she’d had an allergic reaction. She shuddered.
I watched the video again in horror, too. The locket glinting in the light caused a tiny shard of a memory to surface: I remembered lifting the lid of my baby box, pulling out the locket from under a half-chewed teething giraffe, a lacy receiving blanket, and a pair of knit booties, and putting it around my neck. The video itself brought back nothing though. I didn’t know if it had happened in my backyard . . . or three states away. I wished I could slap my post-death memory across the face.
But the video had to be how I died, right? Especially from that quick flashback I’d had when I’d awakened in Emma’s bathroom: that face close to mine, my heart beating hard, my murderer standing above me. But I had no idea how this whole death thing worked: Had I popped into Emma’s world the moment after I’d taken my last breath, or was it days—months—later? And how did the video get posted online? Had my family seen it? My friends? Was this some kind of twisted ransom note?
Emma finally glanced up from the screen. “Where did you find this?” she asked Travis.
“Guess someone didn’t know she was a star on the Internet, huh?” Travis snatched the phone from her hands.
Clarice raked her fingers through her hair. She kept glancing from the video screen to Emma’s face. “Is this what you do for fun?” she asked Emma in a hoarse voice.
“She probably does it to get high.” Travis paced around the patio like a prowling lion. “I knew some girls at school last year who were, like, obsessed with it. One of them almost died.”
Clarice clapped her hand over her mouth. “What’s wrong with you?”
Emma’s eyes darted from Travis to Clarice. “Wait, no. That’s not me. The girl in this video is someone else.”
Travis rolled his eyes. “Someone who looks exactly like you?” he deadpanned. “Let me guess. A long-lost sister? An evil twin?”
There was a low rumbling of thunder in the distance. The breeze smelled like wet pavement, a telltale sign that a storm was close. A long-lost sister. The idea ignited in Emma’s mind like a Fourth of July sparkler. It was possible. She’d asked Social Services once if Becky had had any other kids she’d abandoned along the way, but they said they didn’t know.
A thought burned in my mind, too: I was adopted. That much I remembered. It was common knowledge in my family; my parents had never tried to hide it. They’d told me my adoption had been a last-minute scramble and they’d never met my birth mother. Could it be possible? It explained why I was literally stuck to this girl who looked just like me, following her around as if our souls had been tethered together.
Clarice tapped her long nails on the table. “I don’t tolerate lying or stealing in this house, Emma.”
Emma felt like she’d just been kicked in the stomach. “That’s not me in the video,” she protested. “And I didn’t steal from you. I swear.”
Emma reached for her canvas bag on the patio table. All she had to do was call Eddie, her manager at the roller coaster. He’d vouch for her hours today. But Travis got to her bag first, knocking it over so all of its contents spilled out onto the pavement.
“Oops!” he cried gleefully.
Emma watched helplessly as her tattered copy of The Sun Also Rises landed on a dusty anthill. A crumpled ticket for a free all-you-can-eat BBQ buffet at MGM Grand got caught in the breeze and drifted toward Travis’s free weights. Her BlackBerry and a tube of cherry-flavored ChapStick skittered to a stop next to a terra-cotta turtle. Last but not least, there was a suspicious-looking wad of bills held together with a thick purple rubber band. The wad thudded to the patio, bounced once, and landed in front of Clarice’s chunky heels.
Emma was too stunned to speak. Clarice snatched the money and licked her pointer finger to count it. “Two hundred,” she said when she was finished. She held up a twenty with blue scribble in the upper left-hand corner. Even in the fading light, Emma could see a big looped B, presumably for Bruce Willis. “What did you do with the other fifty?”
A neighbor’s wind chimes tinkled in the distance. Emma’s insides were frozen. “I-I have no idea how that got in my bag.”
Behind her, Travis snickered. “Busted.” He was leaning casually against the stucco wall, just to the left of the big round thermometer. He crossed his arms over his chest, and his top lip was curled in a sneer.
The hair on the back of Emma’s neck rose. All at once, she understood what was going on. Her lips started to twitch, just like they always did when she was about to lose it. “You did this!” She pointed a finger at Travis. “You set me up!”
Travis smirked. Something inside Emma broke loose. Screw keeping the peace. Screw adapting to whatever the foster family needed her to be. She shot for him, grabbing Travis by his meaty neck.
“Emma!” Clarice shrieked, pulling her off her son. Emma staggered backward, bumping against one of the patio chairs.
Clarice spun Emma around so that they were face-to-face. “What’s gotten into you?”
Emma didn’t answer. She glowered at Travis again. He had flattened himself against the wall, his arms in front of him protectively, but there was a thrilled glow in his eyes.
Clarice turned away from Emma, sank down in the chair, and rubbed her eyes. Mascara smudged on her fingertips. “This isn’t working,” she said softly after a moment. She raised her head and gazed soberly at Emma. “I thought you were a sweet, nice girl who wouldn’t cause any trouble, Emma, but this is too much for us.”
“I didn’t do anything,” Emma whispered. “I swear.”
Clarice pulled out a nail file and started nervously sawing on her pinkie. “You can stay until your birthday, but after that you’re on your own.”
Emma blinked. “You’re kicking me out?”
Clarice stopped filing. Her face softened. “I’m sorry,” she said gently. “But this is the best choice for all of us.”
Emma turned away and stared hard at the ugly block wall at the back of the property.
“I wish things were different.” Clarice pulled the sliding door open and padded back into the house. As soon as she was out of view, Travis peeled himself off the wall and straightened up to full height.
He sauntered casually around Emma, scooped up the tiny nub of the joint that was still under the chair, blew off the bits of dried grass that had stuck to the tip, and dropped it into his enormous pants pocket. “You’re lucky she didn’t press charges,” he said in a slimy voice.
Emma said nothing as he swaggered back into the house. She wanted to leap up and claw his eyes out, but her legs felt like they had been filled with heavy wet clay. Her eyes blurred with tears. This again. Every time a foster family told Emma she had to move on, she invariably thought back to the cold, lonely moment when she’d realized Becky had ditched her for good. Emma had stayed a week at Sasha Morgan’s house while the police tried to track down her mom. She’d put on a brave face, playing Candy Land, watching Dora the Explorer, and making scavenger hunts for Sasha like the ones Becky had masterminded for her. But every night in the glow of Sasha’s Cinderella night-light, Emma struggled to read the parts of Harry Potter she could understand—which weren’t many. She’d barely mastered The Cat in the Hat. She needed her mom to read the big words. She needed her mom to do the voices. Even now, it still hurt.
The patio was silent. The wind blew the hanging spider plants and palm trees sideways. Emma stared blankly at the terra-cotta sculpture of a shapely woman that Travis and his friends liked to dry-hump. So that was that. No more staying here until the end of high school. No more applying to a photojournalism program at USC . . . or even community college. She had nowhere to go. No one to turn to. Unless . . .
Suddenly, the image from the video fluttered through her mind once more. A long-lost sister. Her heart lifted. She had to find her.
If only I could have told her it was too late.
Chapter 3
YOU KNOW IT’S TRUE IF YOU READ IT ON FACEBOOK
An hour later, Emma stood in her little bedroom, her Army-Navy bags splayed open on the floor. Why wait to pack? She also held her phone to her ear, talking to Alexandra Stokes, her best friend from back in Henderson.
“You could always stay with me,” Alex offered after Emma finished telling her that Clarice had just kicked her out. “I can talk to my mom. She might be cool with it.”
Emma shut her eyes. She and Alex had been on the cross-country team together last year. They’d both wiped out on a downhill part of a trail run on the first day of practice, and they’d become fast friends while the nurse cleaned their wounds with ultra-stingy hydrogen peroxide. She and Emma had spent their entire junior year sneaking into the casinos and taking pictures of celebrities and lookalikes with Alex’s Canon SLR, trolling the pawn shops but never buying anything, and sunning themselves at Lake Mead on weekends.
“That’s a lot to ask of your family.” Emma removed a pile of vintage T-shirts from her top drawer and plopped them into the duffel. She’d stayed with the Stokeses for a couple of weeks after Ursula and Steve relocated to the Florida Keys. Emma had had a great time, but Ms. Stokes was a single mom with enough to manage already.
“It’s crazy for Clarice to kick you out,” Alex said. Soft smacking sounds filled the receiver; she was probably chomping on a piece of chocolate Twizzlers, her favorite candy. “She can’t honestly think you stole that money.”
“Actually, it wasn’t just that.” Emma scooped up a stack of jeans and tossed them in the bag, too.
“Was there something else?” Alex asked.
Emma picked at a loose military patch on the old duffel. “I can’t get into it right now.” She didn’t want to tell Alex about the video she’d seen. She wanted to keep it to herself for a little while longer, just in case it wasn’t real. “But I’ll explain soon, okay? I promise.”
After Emma hung up, she sat on the carpet and looked around. She’d pulled all her photography prints by Margaret Bourke-White and Annie Leibovitz off the walls and her collection of classic novels and sci-fi thrillers off the shelves; the place now looked like a pay-by-the-hour motel room. She stared into the open bureau drawer, which contained her favorite things, the stuff she carried to every foster home. There was the hand-knitted monster toy Mrs. Hewes, a piano teacher, had given her the day she’d mastered “Für Elise” despite not actually having a piano at home to practice on. She’d saved a couple of scavenger hunt clues from Becky, the creases soft and the paper nearly disintegrating. And there was Socktopus, the threadbare stuffed octopus Becky had bought for Emma during a road trip to Four Corners. Nestled at the bottom of the drawer were her five cloth-bound journals, stuffed with poetry, the Comebacks I Should’ve Said list, the Ways to Flirt (WTF) list, the Stuff I Love and Hate list, and a thorough review of every secondhand store in the area. Emma had mastered the thrift store circuit. She knew exactly which days new shipments hit the floor, how to haggle for better prices, and to always paw through the bottom of the shoe bin—she’d once scored a barely scuffed pair of Kate Spade flats that way.
Finally, Emma lifted the battered Polaroid camera and a large stack of Polaroid photos from the corner of the drawer. The camera had been Becky’s, but Emma had brought it with her to Sasha’s house the night her mom had taken off. Not long after that, Emma had begun to write fake news captions to match the photos about her life and the goings-on of her foster families: “Foster Mom Gets Sick of Kids, Locks Self in Bedroom to Watch Leave It to Beaver.” “Hippies Leave for Florida Unannounced.” “Semi-decent Foster Mom Gets Job in Hong Kong; Foster Kid Not Invited.” She was the one and only reporter on the Emma beat. If she were in the right mind-set, she’d craft a new top story for today: “Evil Foster Brother Ruins Girl’s Life.” Or maybe “Girl Discovers Doppelgänger on Internet. Perhaps a Long-Lost Sister?”
Emma paused at the thought. She glanced at the tattered Dell laptop on the floor, which she’d bought from a pawn shop. Taking a deep breath, she set it on the bed and opened the lid. The screen glowed to life, and Emma quickly called up the video site where Travis had found the fake strangling film. The familiar video was the very first item on the list. It had been posted earlier that evening.
Emma pressed PLAY, and the grainy image appeared. The blindfolded girl bucked and scratched. The dark figure pulled the necklace taut around her neck. Then the camera fell, and someone emerged and whipped off the blindfold. The girl’s face was ashen and dazed. She looked around frantically, her eyes rolling around in her head like loose marbles. Then she looked at the camera. Her blue-green eyes were glassy and her pink lips glowed. It was Emma’s exact face. Everything about it was the same.
“Who are you?” Emma whispered, a shiver running up her spine.
I wished I could answer her. I wished I could do something useful instead of just dangling over her silently like a creepy ghost-stalker. It was like watching a movie, except I couldn’t even call out or throw popcorn at the screen.
The clip ended, and the site asked Emma if she wanted to replay it. The bed springs squeaked as she shifted her weight, thinking. After a moment, she typed SuttonInAz into a Google search. A few sites popped up instantly, including a Facebook page by the same name. SUTTON MERCER, it said. TUCSON, ARIZONA.
Screeching tires out the window sounded like a cackle. The Facebook page loaded, and Emma gasped. There was Sutton Mercer, standing in a foyer of a house with a bunch of girls by her side. She wore a black halter-style dress, a sparkly headband, and silver high heels. Emma blinked at her face, feeling queasy. She leaned in closer, certain she would see a difference that would set Sutton apart from herself, but everything, down to Sutton’s petite ears and the same perfectly square, perfectly straight teeth, was identical.
The more Emma thought about it, the more she could believe she had a long-lost twin. For one thing, there were certain times in life where she felt accompanied, as if someone was watching her. Sometimes she woke up in the morning after having crazy dreams about a girl who looked like her . . . but she knew it wasn’t her. The dreams were always vivid: riding on a sun-dappled Appaloosa at someone’s farm, dragging a dark-haired doll across a patio. Besides, if Becky was irresponsible enough to forget Emma at the Circle K, maybe she’d done the same thing with another baby. Perhaps all those duplicate pairs of shoes Manic Becky bought weren’t for Emma at all, but for Emma’s twin sister, a girl Becky had already abandoned.
Perhaps Emma was right, I thought. Perhaps they’d been for me.
Emma moved the mouse over the girls standing next to Sutton in the photo. MADELINE VEGA, said a small pop-up tag. Madeline had sleek black hair, huge brown eyes, a willowy build, and a gap between her front teeth, just like Madonna. Her head tilted suggestively to one side. There was a fake—or perhaps real?—tattoo of a rose on the inside of her wrist, and her bloodred dress plunged provocatively to her breast bone.
The girl next to Madeline was a redhead named Charlotte Chamberlain. She had pink, pale skin and pretty green eyes, and wore a black silk dress that tugged over her broad shoulders. Two blondes with similar wide eyes and upturned noses stood on either end of the group. Their names were Lilianna and Gabriella Fiorello; in the caption Sutton had nicknamed them THE TWITTER TWINS.
I looked over Emma’s shoulder. I recognized the girls in the photos. I understood we used to be close. But they were like books I’d read two summers ago; I knew I’d liked them, but I couldn’t tell you now what they’d been about.
Emma scrolled down the page. Most of the Facebook profile was public. Sutton Mercer was going to be a senior this year, just like Emma. She attended a school called Hollier High. Her interests were tennis, shopping at La Encantada Mall, and the Papaya Quench full body wrap at Canyon Ranch. Under LIKES AND DISLIKES, she’d written, I love Gucci more than Pucci, but not as much as Juicy. Emma frowned at the line.
Yeah, I had no idea what it meant, either.
Next, Emma clicked on the photo page and peered at a picture of a bunch of girls in tennis polos, skirts, and sneakers. A plaque that said HOLLIER TENNIS TEAM rested at their feet. Emma rolled the mouse over the girls’ names until she found Sutton’s. She stood third from the left, her hair pulled back tautly into a smooth ponytail. Emma moved the mouse to the dark-haired Indian girl to the right. A tag over her head said NISHA BANERJEE. There was a saccharine, kiss-ass smile on her face.
I stared hard at her, a spotty, snapping sensation coursing through my weightless body. I knew I didn’t like Nisha, but I didn’t know why.
Next Emma looked at a shot of Sutton and Charlotte standing on the tennis courts next to a tall, handsome, graying man. There was no tag over his face, but the caption said, Me, C, and Mr. Chamberlain at Arizona Tennis Classic. After that was a shot of Sutton with her arms around a handsome, sweet-looking, blond-haired guy wearing a Hollier soccer jersey. Love ya, G! she’d written. Someone named Garrett had replied in the comments window: I love u too, Sutton.
Aw, Emma thought.
My heart warmed, too.
The last picture Emma clicked on was a shot of Sutton sitting around a patio table with two attractive, older adults and a dirty-blond, square-jawed girl named Laurel Mercer. Sutton’s adoptive sister, presumably. Everyone was grinning and holding slushy drinks in a toast. I heart the fam, the caption proclaimed.
Emma lingered on the photo for a long time, her chest aching. All of her daydreams about a Mom Star, Dad Star, and Emma Star family looked pretty much like this: an attractive, happy family, a nice house, a good life. If she cut her own head out of a snapshot and pasted it on Sutton’s body, the picture would look no different. Yet her story was as opposite from this as could be.
There were a few YouTube clips on the Facebook page, and Emma clicked on the first one. Sutton stood on what looked like a lush green golf course with Madeline and Charlotte. Everyone knelt down and vigorously shook canisters in their hands. Slowly, silently, they spray-painted designs on a large rock. WE MISS YOU, T, Madeline’s message said. Sutton’s message said NISHA WAS HERE.
“Where’s Laurel?” Charlotte asked.
“A thousand bucks says she’s too scared,” Sutton murmured on the screen. Her voice was so familiar it made Emma’s throat catch.
Emma clicked on the other videos. There was one of Sutton and her friends skydiving, another of them bungee jumping. A whole bunch of videos showed one of the girls walking around the corner unaware, and the rest of them ambushing her and making her scream. The last video was titled “Cross my heart, hope to die.” It opened with Madeline pirouetting into a pool at night. As soon as she hit the water, she started to flail. “Help!” she screamed, her dark hair plastered against her face. “I think I broke my leg! I . . . can’t . . . move!”
The camera wobbled. “Mads?” Charlotte cried out.
“Shit,” someone else said.
“Help!” Madeline continued to flail.
“Wait a minute,” Sutton’s voice called haltingly. “Did she say it?”
The camera zinged to Charlotte, frozen midstep. She held a red-and-white life preserver in her hands. “What?” she asked dazedly.
“Did she say it?” Sutton said again.
“I-I don’t think so,” Charlotte squeaked. She clamped her lips together and dropped the life preserver on the deck. “Very funny. We know you’re faking, Mads,” she yelled, annoyed. “Such a bad actress,” she said under her breath.
Madeline stopped splashing. “Fine,” she panted, paddling for the ladder. “But I had you going for a minute. Char looked like she was going to pee her pants.” Everyone cackled.
Whoa, Emma thought. So this was what they did for fun?
I was a little freaked, too.
Emma searched the rest of the Facebook profile for any references to the weird strangling video Travis had found, but there wasn’t a single mention. The only semi-spooky thing she found was a scan of a black-and-white flyer that said MISSING SINCE JUNE 17, a boy’s face grinning back at her. THAYER VEGA, it said in block letters under the photo. Emma clicked back to the names on Sutton’s profile picture. Madeline’s last name was Vega, too.
Finally, she clicked on Sutton’s Wall. Sutton had written a post just a few hours before: Ever wish you could run away? Sometimes I do. Emma frowned. Why would Sutton want to run away? It looked like she had everything.
I had no idea, but that post told me tons. If I’d written it only a few hours before, it meant I hadn’t been dead for long. Did anyone even know I’d been killed? I looked at the rest of my Wall that was visible on the screen. No RIP, Sutton notes or plans for a Sutton Mercer memorial. Maybe no one knew then. Maybe no one had found me? Was I lying in a field somewhere, my necklace still at my throat? I gazed down at my shimmering body. Even though no one else could see me, every so often I could just make out a tiny flicker of myself—a hand here, an elbow there, a pair of terry-cloth shorts and yellow FitFlops. I didn’t see any blood. My skin wasn’t blue.
Just as Emma was about to close up the computer, some more posts on Sutton’s Wall caught her eye. Can’t wait for your b-day party! Charlotte had written. It’s going to be sick! Emma’s birthday was coming up, too. She checked Sutton’s Info tab. The birthday listed was September 10, the same as Emma’s.
Her heart pounded. That was some coincidence.
I felt scared and hopeful and confused, too. Maybe it was real. Maybe we were twins.
After a moment, Emma opened a new window and logged into her own Facebook page. It looked paltry and pathetic next to Sutton’s—her profile picture was a blurry close-up of herself and Socktopus, and she only had five friends: Alex, an old foster sister named Tracy, Ben & Jerry’s Chunky Monkey, and two of the cast members from CSI. Then she found Sutton’s page again and clicked on the button that said SEND SUTTON A MESSAGE. When the window appeared, she typed: This will sound crazy, but I think we’re related. We look exactly the same, and we have the same birthday. I live in Nevada, not too far from you. You’re not by any chance adopted, are you? Write back or call if you want to talk.
MESSAGE SENT! the screen announced. Emma stared around the quiet room, the small fan on the desk blowing warmish air in her face. After the possibly life-altering thing that had just happened, she expected the world to have miraculously and drastically transformed—a leprechaun to dance through the open window, Clarice’s kitschy terra-cotta patio sculptures to come to life and start a conga line, something. But there was still the long, jagged crack in the plaster in the ceiling and the blotchy, M-shaped stain on the carpet near the closet.
The little clock in the corner of the laptop screen clicked from 10:12 to 10:13 P.M. She refreshed her Facebook page. She peeked out a slit in the dusty blinds at the night sky and found the Mom, Dad, and Emma stars. Her heart rollicked in her chest. What had she done? She reached for her phone and dialed Alex’s number, but Alex didn’t pick up. YOU THERE? she texted Alex, but there was no response.
The traffic on the highway grew sparse and whispery. Emma let out a long sigh, thinking of what came next. Maybe she could move back to Henderson, live in Alex’s spare room, and pay rent to Alex’s mom. She’d work full-time—perhaps night shifts at the twenty-four-hour Target near Alex’s house—and somehow finish high school, too. Maybe she could even intern at the local newspaper on the weekends. . . .
Bzzzzzzz.
Emma’s eyes popped open. Out the window, the moon had climbed high in the sky. The clock on the side table said 12:56 A.M. She’d dozed off.
Bzzzzzzz.
Her phone was flashing. She stared at it for a long moment, as if she was afraid it might leap up and bite her.
There was an envelope icon on the screen. Her heart churned faster and faster. Trembling, she clicked OPEN. Emma had to read the Facebook message four times before the words really sunk in.
OMG. I can’t believe this. Yes, I was totally adopted. But I never knew you existed until now. Can u meet me at the hiking base of Sabino Canyon in Tucson 2morro at 6 PM? Attached is my cell number. Don’t tell anyone who you are until we talk—it’s dangerous! See you soon!
Love, Sutton (your twin)
Of course, there was one problem with that note: I didn’t write it.
Chapter 4
REUNION INTERRUPTED
Late the following afternoon, Emma staggered off a Greyhound bus, her green duffel in tow. Heat radiated off the parking lot in waves; the air was so stifling that she felt like she’d just stepped into the barrel of a giant hair dryer. To her right were small adobe homes and a purple-stucco yoga studio for men called hOMbre. To her left was a large, crumbling building called the Hotel Congress, which looked haunted. Posters for upcoming concerts plastered the front windows. A couple of hipsters loitered on the street, smoking cigarettes. Beyond that was what looked like a shop for dominatrix hookers; whip-wielding mannequins in catsuits, fishnet stockings, and thigh-high boots filled the front windows.
Emma spun around again and faced the Greyhound bus station. TUCSON DOWNTOWN, said a low-slung sign out front. After hours of sitting on a bus next to a guy with a devil beard and a serious addiction to jalapeño-flavored Doritos, she was finally here. She was tempted to run up to the large Greyhound on the sign and give it a big, wet kiss, but then her phone vibrated in her pocket and she scrambled to answer it. Alex’s photo appeared on the screen.
“Hey!” Emma clutched the old BlackBerry to her ear. “Guess where I am?”
“You didn’t,” Alex gasped on the other end.
“I did.” Emma dragged her duffel to a bench under the awning and sat down to rest. Alex had finally written back to Emma’s YOU THERE? text last night. Emma had called her immediately, blurting out the whole story in one long, breathless sentence.
“I left Clarice a note,” Emma said, moving her long legs out of the way as an older couple pulling wheeled suitcases passed. “Social Services won’t check up on me, either—I’m too close to turning eighteen.”
“So what are you going to say to this Sutton girl? I mean, if she’s really your sister, do you think you’ll be able to move in with her?” Alex sighed wistfully. “It’s like Cinderella, except without the lame prince!”
Emma leaned back on the bench and gazed at the purplish mountains in the distance. “I don’t want to get too far ahead of things,” she said. “Let’s just see if we even get along.”
It was all an act. The entire bus ride, Emma imagined how meeting Sutton might just change her life. Maybe she could move to Tucson and go to Sutton’s school. She could get to know Sutton’s adoptive parents, too. Maybe they’ll even let me move in with them, she dared to consider. Goose bumps rose on her arms. Okay, that was a long shot, but who knew? It was like a cooler version of Cinderella.
But first things first: the meeting today. Emma spotted a single neon-green cab on the other side of the bus station and waved it over. “Please don’t tell anyone, okay?” she said to Alex.
“I promise,” Alex agreed. “Good luck.”
“Thanks.”
Emma hung up, climbed into the backseat of the cab, and gave Sabino Canyon as her destination, barely able to temper the giddiness in her voice. The cabbie pulled away and wove through Tucson’s streets. Emma stared out the grimy window, grinning at the various college buildings of the University of Arizona, including one that had PHOTOGRAPHY INSTITUTE on a big sign out front. Emma couldn’t wait to go inside and check out the exhibit. Next they passed the college green. Students loitered in the sun. A running group pranced by like a herd of deer. There was a girl dressed up as a marijuana plant in the middle of the courtyard holding a sign that said HONK 4 WEED! The cabbie honked.
Next they pulled onto Highway 10 and drove north. The houses grew larger and the streets were speckled with fancy gyms, cute bistros, gourmet markets, and upscale boutiques. Emma passed the entrance to La Encantada Mall, and then the lush Elizabeth Arden Red Door spa. Maybe Sutton and I can have a pedicure day, she thought.
Actually, that made her a little nervous. She’d never gotten a professional pedicure before. Whenever someone touched her feet, she let out a hitchy laugh like Ernie on Sesame Street.
As for me, all I felt was numbness as the car whipped past these landmarks. Certain emotions and senses flashed deep beneath the surface—vague blips of elation and thrill as we passed a restaurant called NoRTH, the smell of jasmine perfume as the cab swept past the shops at La Encantada—but nothing solid emerged. Questions buzzed in my head like a swarm of bees. Who had written back to Emma? Had anyone else discovered I was dead? I was desperate to get another look at my Facebook page, but Emma hadn’t clicked on it again. A whole day had passed since my death—maybe more; where did everyone think I was? And why hadn’t someone found my body? Then again, if someone had murdered me, I could be chopped up in a zillion pieces by now.
I wanted to cry out. I wanted to wail. But all I could do was follow Emma in a state of mute shock and panic. It was like those terrible dreams where I was falling down, down, down from the top of a tall building. I always tried to call out for someone to catch me, but no one ever answered.
The cab took a left, and a mountain rose up before Emma’s eyes. A pitted, wooden sign said SABINO CANYON. “Here you are,” the driver said, pulling to the curb.
This was it. Emma handed the cabbie a twenty and crunched across the gravel to a bench. She inhaled the jumbled scents of sunscreen, dust, and sun-baked rock. Evening hikers stretched their calves against a parking barrier a few feet away. The shimmering mountain range interrupted the blue sky. Little pinpricks of pink, yellow, and purple wildflowers dotted the trail.
It’s perfect, Emma thought. On instinct, she pulled her old Polaroid camera from the duffel. She hadn’t brought that much with her to Tucson—just her wallet, Socktopus, a change of clothes, the camera, and her journal, because she was afraid to go anywhere without it. She’d left most everything else, including her savings, in a storage locker at the Vegas bus station. The device made a churning noise as she snapped a photo. Emma watched the picture slowly develop. Long-Lost Sisters Meet for the First Time, she mentally captioned.
It was six on the dot. She sat down on a bench, pulled out a Maybelline compact, and took stock of her reflection. She wore a striped jersey Gap dress that she’d found at Cinnamon’s, a secondhand shop near Clarice’s house, and she’d smeared a lot of shiny gloss over her lips. She covertly sniffed her skin, hoping she didn’t smell like bus exhaust or jalapeño Doritos. Meeting Sutton reminded her of walking into a new foster home for the first time. The parents always gave her a long, discerning look, instantly deciding whether she passed or failed. Please like me, she always thought as she stood in countless kitchens or on interchangeable front porches. Please make this bearable. Please don’t let me have a booger hanging out of my nose.
More people emerged from the canyon trail. Emma checked the clock on her phone. It was 6:10. What if Sutton was late to everything? People like that drove Emma crazy. And what were they going to say to each other, anyway? “Hi, Sutton,” Emma mouthed, practicing a smile. “So Becky lost you, too?” She pantomimed reaching out her hand, and then shook her head and pulled back. They’d hug, wouldn’t they? What if they just stood there awkwardly, staring into space?
The strange film fluttered through her mind again. Who agreed to be strangled for fun, anyway? She thought about the girls Travis had mentioned yesterday.
“Oh!” cried someone behind her.
Emma jumped and turned around, looking at the unfamiliar man in shorts and a polo shirt standing a few feet away. With his salt-and-pepper hair and slightly round physique, he reminded Emma of Dr. Lowry, the only social worker she’d ever liked, mostly because he’d spoken to Emma like a human being and not a foster child freak. But then the photo on Facebook of Charlotte and Sutton standing on a tennis court with this guy popped into her head. Me, C, and Mr. Chamberlain at Arizona Tennis Classic. This was someone from Sutton’s world, not hers.
Not that I had much recollection of him.
There was a troubled look on the man’s face. “W-What are you doing out here, Sutton?”
Emma blinked hard, realizing what he’d called her. She gave him a wobbly smile. Her tongue felt bloated and heavy in her mouth. Don’t tell anyone who you are, the email had said. It’s dangerous.
“Um, just hanging out,” Emma answered, feeling ridiculously foolish. Her palms itched, too, just like they always did when she lied to adults.
“Are you going for a hike?” Charlotte’s dad pressed. “Is this where kids meet these days?”
Emma glanced toward the road, hoping she’d see a girl who looked just like her pulling up to the curb to clear this up. A few cars passed without stopping. A couple of kids on Schwinn cruiser bikes rode past, laughing. “Um, not exactly.”
A dog across the path let out a bark. Emma stiffened—a Chow had bitten her when she was nine, and she’d been wary of dogs ever since. But the dog was straining at a rabbit that had suddenly emerged from around the bend. Charlotte’s dad pushed his hands in his pockets. “Well, see ya. Have a nice night.” He quickly walk-jogged away.
Emma slumped on the bench. Awkward. The clock on her phone now said 6:20. She clicked onto her NEW MESSAGES folder, but there was no text saying I’M LATE, BE THERE SOON! Uneasiness began to filter through her body, poisoning everything. Her stomach felt like it was eating itself. All of a sudden, the surroundings didn’t seem quite so magical anymore. The hikers making their way back down the mountain looked like twisted, dark monsters. There was an acrid odor in the air. Something felt very, very wrong.
Crack. Emma’s head whipped around at the sound. Before she could see what it was, a small hand covered her eyes and yanked her to standing. “Wha?” Emma called out. A second hand pressed against her mouth. Emma tried to wrench away, but a hard, cold object pressed between her shoulder blades. She instantly froze. She’d never felt a gun at her back before, but this couldn’t be anything else.
“Don’t move, bitch,” whispered a husky voice. Emma felt hot breath on her neck, but all she could see was the inside of someone’s palm. “You’re coming with us.”
I wished I could see who “us” was, but that was a little wrinkle in this being-dead thing: When Emma couldn’t see, neither could I.
Chapter 5
SHE IS ME
Emma’s feet tripped beneath her, dragging on the ground. The gun dug into her skin. Dark, blurry shapes fluttered through the blindfold someone had quickly tied around her eyes, and the sound of traffic roared in her ears. She let out a panicked whimper. The freaky strangling film flashed through her mind like whirling ambulance lights. Those hands pulling that necklace taut. Sutton slumping over lifelessly.
I thought of the same thing. Terror filled me.
Someone pushed Emma across the road. A horn blared, but then Emma’s foot hit the curb on the other side. As she staggered across the sidewalk, the sound of cars yielded to loud, throbbing bass. The aroma of grilled hamburgers and hot dogs and cigarettes drifted into Emma’s nostrils. There was a loud splash. Someone giggled. Someone else cried, “Love it!” Emma’s hands twitched. Where was she?
“What the hell?”
Suddenly the scarf was ripped from Emma’s eyes. The world lit up for me again at exactly the same time. A familiar girl with long, reddish hair, pale skin, broad shoulders and a thick waist hovered in front of Emma. She wore a short blue dress with lace around the neck. Charlotte—the name came to Emma. “She’s learned her lesson already, don’t you think?” Charlotte snapped, throwing the blindfold behind a potted cactus.
Someone freed Emma’s hands from their confines behind her back. She no longer felt the gun pressed between her shoulder blades either. Emma whipped around. Three pretty girls in party dresses and sparkly makeup stood before her.
The tallest one had dark hair, jutting collarbones, a deconstructed ballerina bun, and a tattoo of a rose on the inside of her wrist. Madeline Vega, the girl in Sutton’s Facebook profile photo. Next to Madeline stood two girls with Crayola-maize hair and pale blue eyes. Both girls held iPhones. One was preppy, in a polo dress, a white headband, and wedge sandals with grosgrain ties. The other looked like she’d stepped off a Green Day video—she wore lots of eye makeup, a plaid dress, high boots, and a stack of black jelly bracelets around her wrists. They had to be Gabriella and Lilianna Fiorello, the Twitter Twins.
“Gotcha!” Madeline gave Emma a weak smile. The Twitter Twins grinned, too.
“Since when did we get all eco?” Charlotte sighed loudly behind them. “Recycling is not part of our rules.”
Madeline pulled the short, white A-line dress she was wearing down her thighs. “It wasn’t technically a repeat, Char. Sutton knew it was us the whole time.” She raised a tube of lipstick into the air, then pressed it between Emma’s shoulder blades again. “My mom’s Chihuahua would’ve known this wasn’t a gun.”
Emma wrenched away. The tube of lipstick had definitely fooled her. Then, she realized something else—Madeline had called her Sutton, just like Charlotte’s dad had. “Wait a minute,” she blurted, struggling to find her voice. “I’m not—”
Charlotte cut her off, her gaze still on Madeline. “Even if Sutton knew it was you, it’s still poor form. And you know it.” She had a sarcastic voice and a penetrating stare. Although Charlotte wasn’t the prettiest in the crowd, she was clearly the alpha. “Besides, since when do we do things like that with them?” She pointed at Gabriella and Lilianna, who lowered their eyes sheepishly.
Madeline fiddled with the leather strap of her oversized watch. “Don’t be such a hater. It was spontaneous. I saw Sutton and just . . . went for it.”
Charlotte stepped a tiny bit closer to Madeline and puffed up her chest. “We made up the rules together, remember? Or do those tight buns you wear to ballet class cut off the circulation to your brain?”
Madeline’s chin wobbled for a moment. Her big eyes, high cheekbones, and bow-shaped lips reminded Emma of a figurehead on a ship. But Emma noticed Madeline slowly massaging a hot-pink rabbit’s foot on the key ring of her bag, as if all the beauty in the world hadn’t brought her luck. “It’s better than your too-tight jeans cutting off the circulation to your butt,” Madeline shot back.
I reached out to Madeline, but my fingers slipped through her skin. “Mads?” I called out. I touched Charlotte on the shoulder. “Char?” She didn’t even flinch. Nothing new about them came back to me. I knew I loved them, but I really didn’t know why. But how could they stand there and think Emma was me? How could they not know their BFF was dead?
“Um, guys,” Emma tried again, staring across the wide avenue. The entrance to Sabino Canyon glowed beckoningly in the sunset. “There’s somewhere I need to be.”
Madeline gave her a duh look. “Uh, yeah? Nisha’s party?” She looped her arm around Emma’s elbow and yanked her toward the small wrought-iron gate that led to the backyard of the house whose driveway they stood in. “Look, I know you and Nisha have issues, but this is the last party before school tomorrow. It’s not like you have to talk to her. Where have you been anyway? We’ve been calling you all day. And what were you doing sitting in front of Sabino? You looked like a zombie.”
“It was freaky,” Lilianna piped up.
“Super freaky,” Gabriella agreed in an identical voice. Then she reached into her pocket and pulled out a small prescription bottle. Popping off the cap, she shook two pills into her hand and pushed them into her mouth, washing them down with a swig from a Diet Coke bottle. Party girl, Emma thought warily.
She stared at the four girls. Should she tell them who she really was? What if it really was dangerous? Suddenly she felt her shoulder and realized that she’d lost her duffel bag in the fake kidnapping. When she looked across the street, it was still there. She’d slip away and get it as soon as she could. And if Sutton showed up, maybe she’d see it and know Emma had been there.
“Hang on a second.” Emma stopped short next to a large flowering barrel cactus. She wriggled her arm from Madeline’s grasp and pulled her phone out of her pocket—at least it wasn’t in the duffel, too. No new messages. She shaded the screen with one hand and composed several new texts to the cell number Sutton had given Emma in her Facebook reply last night: Your friends found me. I’m at a party across the street. They think I’m you. I didn’t know what to tell them. Txt me with further instructions, K?
Emma typed quickly—she knew the third-place finish in the speed-texting contest in Vegas two years ago would come in handy someday—and pressed SEND. There. Sutton could meet her here and straighten out who was who . . . or Emma could meet her later and just pretend she was Sutton for the duration of the party.
“Who are you writing to?” Madeline leaned over Emma’s phone, trying to get a look at the screen. “And why are you using a BlackBerry? I thought you got rid of that thing.”
Emma slipped her phone back into her pocket before Madeline could see. Sutton’s Facebook posts flitted into Emma’s mind. She straightened up and gave Madeline the same coy look she’d seen her sister make in the YouTube videos. “Wouldn’t you love to know, bitch.”
As soon as she’d finished saying the words, Emma clamped her mouth shut and sucked in her stomach. She wouldn’t have been more surprised if a bouquet of daisies had popped out of her mouth. Comments like that ended up on her CISS list, not in her day-to-day conversation.
Madeline let out a haughty sniff. “Fine, ho beast.” Then she whipped out her iPhone. A big sticker of a ballet dancer on the back said SWAN LAKE MAFIA. “Smush in!”
Everyone pressed together and smiled. Madeline held the phone outstretched. Emma stood on the end, grinning weakly.
And then they started down the driveway. The night air had cooled significantly, and the jumbled aromas of the charcoal grill, citronella candles, and cigarettes wafted into Emma’s nostrils. Gabriella and Lilianna walked and tweeted at the same time. As they bypassed the front door to cut around the stone path on the side of the house, Charlotte pulled Emma back so they were walking alone.
“Are you okay?” Charlotte straightened her flutter-sleeved dress so that her thick bra strap didn’t show. Her arms were dotted with thousands of freckles.
“I’m fine,” Emma said breezily, even though her fingers still trembled, and her heart banged madly against her ribs.
“So where’s Laurel?” Charlotte pulled a tube of lip gloss from her purse and smeared it over her lips. “I thought you said you were going to drive her here.”
Emma’s eyes darted back and forth. Laurel. That was Sutton’s sister, right? She wished she had a Wiki-Sutton application on her BlackBerry or something. “Uh . . .”
Charlotte widened her eyes. “You ditched her again, didn’t you?” She wagged her finger playfully in Emma’s face. “You’re a bad, bad sister.”
Before Emma could reply, they stepped into the backyard. Someone had strung a banner that said GOODBYE, SUMMER! across a salmon-colored storage shed. Girls in long, flowing maxi dresses and boys in Lacoste polos filled the patio. Two muscled guys in drenched HOLLIER WATER POLO shirts stood in the pool with two skinny girls in bikinis on their shoulders, poised for a chicken fight. A girl with curly hair and long feather earrings laughed way too loudly with a younger, hotter version of Tiger Woods. There was a long table filled with Mexican hot dogs, vegetarian burritos, sushi rolls, and chocolate-covered strawberries. Another table held a bunch of bottles of soda, fruit punch, and ginger ale, and two big jugs of Beefeater and Cuervo.
“Whoa,” Emma couldn’t help but blurt when she saw the liquor. She wasn’t much of a drinker—she and Alex had once drank too much playing a Twilight drinking game and took turns puking in Alex’s mom’s Zen rock garden. And she never knew what to do at parties either. She always felt shy and reserved, the freak foster kid with no home.
“Right?” Madeline murmured, sidling up to Emma. Her gaze was on the table, too. “Casa Banerjee has gone downhill since Nisha’s mom died. Her dad’s so oblivious these days, Nisha could probably have crack pipes as door prizes and he wouldn’t notice.”
Someone touched her arm. “Hey, Sutton,” called a tall, buff, captain-of-a-sports-team type. Emma smiled broadly. A petite dark-haired girl waved at Emma from the drinks table by the French doors. “Your dress is so pretty!” she cooed. “Is it BCBG?”
Emma couldn’t help but feel a tiny twinge of jealousy. Not only did Sutton have a family, but she was wildly popular, too. How come Emma had gotten such a crappy life and Sutton had gotten the great one?
I wasn’t sure about that, considering Emma was alive and I wasn’t.
More kids passed by, brightening when they saw her. Emma grinned and waved and laughed, feeling like a princess greeting her loyal subjects. It felt freeing and almost . . . fun. She understood why sometimes the shyest kids could climb onstage in school plays and completely lose their inhibitions.
“There you are,” growled a sexy voice in Emma’s ear. Emma whirled around to see a handsome blond guy in a gray fitted polo and long khaki-green shorts. A familiar Facebook photo shimmered into her mind: Garrett, Sutton’s boyfriend.
“I haven’t heard from you all day.” Garrett handed Emma a red plastic cup filled with liquid. “I called, I texted . . . where have you been?”
“I’m right here!” I wanted to scream. Brief flashes of kisses, hand-holding, and prom slow dances with Garrett flitted in and out of my brain. I distinctly heard the words I love you. A longing feeling struck me hard.
“Oh, around,” Emma answered vaguely. “But someone’s got to cut the cord a little, don’t you think?” she added, poking Garrett lightly in the ribs. It was something Emma had always been dying to tell every overprotective boyfriend she’d had in the past, the kind who texted her nonstop and freaked if she didn’t immediately reply. Plus it sounded like something Sutton might say.
Garrett pulled her close and stroked her hair. “Good thing I found you.” His hand moved from her hair to her shoulder, then dangerously close to her boob.
“Um . . .” Emma jerked away.
I was so happy she did.
Garrett raised his palms in surrender. “Sorry, sorry.”
Then her BlackBerry vibrated against her hip. Her heart leapt. Sutton.
“Be right back,” she said to Garrett. He nodded, and Emma wove through the crowds of people toward the house. When Garrett turned to talk to a tall Asian guy in a World Cup jersey, Emma crouched low and darted to the side gate.
She turned to glance at the party once more and noticed someone staring at her from the large teak table across the patio. It was a dark-skinned girl with big eyes and a tightly drawn mouth. She wore a yellow wrap dress and a gold cuff on her bicep. It was Nisha, from Sutton’s tennis team photo. This was her party. She stared at Emma as though she wanted to hoist her by the scruff of her neck and throw her out on her butt.
Even though every ounce of Emma’s be-nice-and-don’t-make-trouble being wanted to wave and smile, she steeled herself, thought of Sutton, and shot Nisha a bitchy look. Outrage flashed across Nisha’s face. After a moment, she whipped her head around, her ponytail smacking the face of the girl behind her.
A cautious feeling flitted through me. Nisha and I clearly had issues—big issues.
Not that I had a clue what they were.
Chapter 6
WHO CAN RESIST A BROODER?
Nisha’s driveway was quiet and peaceful. Crickets chirped in the bushes, and the air was cool against Emma’s bare skin. Bluish light from a TV flickered in the window of a house a few doors down. A dog barked behind a block-wall fence. Emma’s pulse began to slow, and her shoulders slowly fell from their crunched position by her ears. She pulled out the BlackBerry and stared at the screen. The message was from Clarice: GOT YOUR NOTE. EVERYTHING OKAY? LET ME KNOW IF YOU NEED ANYTHING.
Emma deleted the message, then refreshed her inbox again. No new messages. Then she looked across the broad highway. A big floodlight shone across the Sabino parking lot. Emma gulped. The park bench was now empty. Had someone taken her stuff? Where was Sutton? And what was she supposed to do when this party ended? Her wallet had been in her bag. Now she had no cash. No ID.
Swish. Emma turned around and faced Nisha’s house. No one was in the driveway. Then, a stiff thwock echoed through the air, a soda can opening. Emma pivoted again. A figure stood on the front porch of the house next door. There was a large telescope by his side, but he was staring straight into Emma’s eyes.
Emma backed away. “Oh. Sorry.”
The guy stepped forward, his prominent cheekbones catching the light. Emma took in his round eyes, thick eyebrows, and closely shorn hair. His mouth was drawn into a straight, tense line that seemed to say back off. He was dressed more casually than the boys at the party, wearing frayed hiking shorts and a threadbare gray T-shirt that showed every contour of his well-muscled chest.
I recognized him, but of course—I should’ve been getting used to this by now—I didn’t know why.
Giggles emerged from Nisha’s backyard. Emma glanced over her shoulder, then back at the boy. She was intrigued by his sullen slouch, and by the fact that he didn’t seem to care that a party was raging next door. She’d always been a sucker for the brooding type. “Why aren’t you at the party?” she asked.
The guy just stared at her, his eyes two huge moons.
Emma walked down the sidewalk until she was right in front of his house. “What are you looking at?” She gestured to the telescope.
He didn’t blink. “Venus?” Emma guessed. “The Big Dipper?”
A small noise escaped from his throat. He ran his hand against the back of his neck and turned away. Finally Emma pivoted on her heel. “Fine,” she said, trying to sound as breezy as possible. “Hang out by yourself. I don’t care.”
“The Perseids, Sutton.”
Emma turned back to him. So he knew Sutton, too. “What are the Perseids?” she asked.
He curled his hands around the porch railing. “It’s a meteor shower.”
Emma crossed toward him. “Can I see?”
The guy stood motionless as Emma walked through the yard. His house was a small, sand-colored bungalow with a carport instead of a garage. A few cacti lined the curb. Up close, he smelled like root beer. The porch light shone down on his face, revealing striking blue eyes. A plate containing a half-eaten sandwich was on the porch swing, and two leather-bound books were on the ground. The tattered cover of the first book said The Collected Poetry of William Carlos Williams. Emma had never met a cute guy who read poetry—not one who’d admit it, anyway.
Finally he looked down, adjusted the telescope lens to Emma’s height, and stepped out of the way. Emma stooped to the eyepiece. “Since when did you become an astronomer?” he asked.
“Since never.” Emma tilted the telescope to the big, full moon. “I usually just give the stars names of my own.”
“Oh yeah? Like what?”
Emma flicked the little lens cap, which hung from a black string off the eyepiece. “Well, like the Bitch Star. There.” She pointed to a small twinkler just over the rooftops. A few years ago, she’d named it for Maria Rowan, a girl in seventh grade who’d spilled a puddle of lemonade under Emma’s desk in Spanish and then told everyone Emma was incontinent. She’d even translated it into Spanish, incontinencia. Emma had fantasized about rocketing Maria into the sky, just like the Greek gods used to banish their children to the underworld for all of eternity.
The guy let out a cough-like laugh. “Actually, I think your Bitch Star is part of Orion’s belt.”
Emma pressed her hand to her chest, like an offended southern belle. “Do you talk to all the girls like that?”
He moved a little closer to her, their arms nearly touching. Emma’s heart jumped to her throat at the effortlessness of it all. For a second, she thought about Carter Hayes, the captain of the Henderson High School basketball team, whom she’d adored from afar. She’d crafted tons of adorable things to say to Carter in her Ways to Flirt list, but whenever they were alone together, she’d always somehow found herself talking about American Idol. She didn’t even like American Idol.
The guy tilted his head up to the sky again. “Maybe the other stars Orion carries around could be the Liar Star and the Cheater Star. Three naughty girls who were dragged by their hair to Orion’s cave.” He looked at her meaningfully.
Emma leaned against the railing, feeling the words carried some special connotation she couldn’t possibly decipher. “It sounds like you’ve done a lot of thinking about this.”
“Maybe.” He had the longest lashes Emma had ever seen. But suddenly his gaze felt less flirty and more . . . curious, maybe.
And suddenly a flash about him came to me. It wasn’t a memory exactly, just an odd mix of gratitude and humiliation. It disappeared almost immediately, nothing more than a glimmer.
The guy broke his gaze away and vigorously rubbed the top of his head. “Sorry. It’s just . . . we haven’t really talked since . . . you know. A while.”
“Well, there’s no time like the present,” Emma said.
A whisper of a smile appeared on his lips. “Yeah.”
They looked at each other again. Fireflies danced around their heads. The air suddenly smelled like wildflowers.
“Sutton?” a girl’s voice called through the darkness.
Emma turned. The guy’s shoulders stiffened.
“Where did she go?” someone else asked.
Emma smoothed her hair behind her ears. She peered across the front yard and saw two figures in Nisha’s driveway. Lilianna’s black Doc Martens clonked as she walked. Gabriella held her iPhone outstretched, using a flashlight app to lead the way.
“Be right there!” Emma yelled back. She glanced at the guy. “Why don’t you come over to the party?”
He made an indignant scoff. “No thanks.”
“Come on.” She kept smiling. “I’ll tell you all about the Slutty Star, the Nerd Star . . .”
The girls reached the end of the guy’s driveway. “Sutton?” Lilianna yelled, squinting in the porch light.
“Who is that?” Gabriella called.
Slam. Emma whipped around. The guy was gone. The dried wreath that hung on the front door shook back and forth, the lock closed with a click, and the blinds on the big bay window to the right quickly twisted shut. Okaaaay.
Emma walked slowly off the porch and across the yard.
“Was that Ethan Landry?” Gabriella demanded.
“Were you talking?” Lilianna asked at the same time. Her voice rippled with intrigue. “What did he say?”
Charlotte appeared behind the Twitter Twins. Her cheeks were flushed, and her forehead looked shiny. “What’s going on?”
Gabriella paused from texting. “Sutton was talking to Ethan.”
“Ethan Landry?” Charlotte’s eyebrows shot up. “Mr. Rebel Without a Cause actually spoke?”
Ethan. At least I could now put a name to his face.
And so could Emma. But then she took in the girls’ confused looks. Leave it to her to instantly bond with a guy who wasn’t one of Sutton’s preapproved friends. At that, she pulled out her phone again. There still weren’t any new messages or texts.
Charlotte’s gaze felt like a piercing-hot laser; Emma had a feeling she had to come up with an explanation—fast. “I think I’ve had too much to drink,” she blurted.
Charlotte clucked her tongue. “Oh, sweetie.” She grabbed Emma by the arm and steered her toward the long line of parked cars. “I’ll take you home.”
Emma straightened up, relieved Charlotte had bought her story. Then she realized what Charlotte was offering. She was going to take her to Sutton’s home. “Yes, please,” she said, and followed Charlotte to her car.
It was a relief to me, too. Back at my house, maybe we’d finally get some answers.
Chapter 7
THE BEDROOM EMMA NEVER HAD
Charlotte pulled her big black Jeep Cherokee alongside the curb and shifted it into PARK. “Here we are, Madam,” she said in a fake British accent.
She had driven Emma to a two-story stucco house with big arched windows. Palms, cacti, and a couple of beautifully maintained flower beds covered the gravel front yard. Flowers in big stone pots lined the archway to the front door, wind chimes dangled over the front porch, and a terra-cotta sun sculpture hung over the three-car garage. Etched into the side of the mailbox at the curb was a simple letter M. Two cars sat in the driveway, a Volkswagen Jetta and a big Nissan SUV.
I could only come up with one word for it: home.
“Someone sure got the short end of the twin stick,” Emma muttered under her breath. If only Becky had ditched her first.
“What was that?” Charlotte asked.
Emma picked at a loose thread on her dress. “Nothing.”
Charlotte touched Emma’s bare arm. “Did Mads freak you out?”
Emma regarded Charlotte’s red hair and blue dress, wishing she could tell her what was going on. “I knew it was them the whole time,” she said instead.
“Okay.” Charlotte turned up the radio. “See you tomorrow then, drunky. Remember to take lots of vitamins before you pass out. And, hey, sleepover at my house on Friday? I promise it’ll be good. My dad’s still out of town, and my mom won’t bother us.”
Emma frowned. “Your dad’s out of town?” The man she’d seen at Sabino Canyon popped into her head.
A worried look crossed Charlotte’s face, the first crack in her armor Emma had seen all night. “He’s been in Tokyo for the past month. Why?”
Emma ran her hand along the back of her neck. “No reason.” The guy on the trail must have been someone else.
She slammed the car door and walked up the driveway. The air smelled citrusy from the orange and lemon trees in the front yard. A silver windsock flapped on the eaves of the front porch. The swirling patterns in the stucco reminded Emma of icing on a cake. She peeked through the foyer window and saw a crystal chandelier and a grand piano. Small reflective stickers on an upstairs bedroom window said, CHILD INSIDE. IN CASE OF FIRE, PLEASE RESCUE FIRST. No foster family had ever bothered to put those stickers on Emma’s windows.
She wished she could take a photo, but then she heard an engine rev behind her. Emma turned and saw Charlotte watching her from the curb, one eyebrow raised. Just leave, Emma silently willed. I’m fine.
The Jeep didn’t budge. Emma scanned the sidewalk, crouched down, and overturned a large rock near to the porch. To her astonishment, a silver key glimmered underneath. She almost burst out laughing. Hiding keys under rocks was something she’d seen on TV; she didn’t think people actually did it.
Emma climbed the porch stairs and stuck the key into the lock. It turned easily. She stepped across the threshold and gave Charlotte another wave. Satisfied, Charlotte pulled away from the curb. The engine snarled, and the red taillights vanished into the night. And then Emma took a deep breath and pushed open the door to the house.
My house, not that I could recall much of it. The creak of the porch swing I used to sit on and read magazines. The smell of the lavender room spray my mom drenched the place with. I could distinctly remember the sound of our doorbell, two high-pitched, tweet-like dings, and that the front door would sometimes stick a bit before opening. But other than that . . .
The foyer was cool and silent. Long shadows dripped down the wall, and the tall wooden grandfather clock ticked in the corner. The floorboards creaked beneath Emma’s feet as she took a tentative step onto the striped carpet runner that led straight to the staircase. She reached out to flip on a nearby light switch, then hesitated and pulled back. She kept expecting alarms to sound, a cage to drop over her head, and people to jump out and shout, “Intruder!”
Grasping the banister, Emma tiptoed up the stairs in the darkness. Maybe Sutton was upstairs. Maybe she just fell asleep, and this was all a big misunderstanding. This night could be salvaged. She could still have the fairy-tale reunion she’d imagined.
A brown wicker hamper stuffed with dirty towels sat just outside a white-tiled bathroom at the top of the landing. Two night-lights glowed near the baseboard, casting yellowish columns of light up the wall. Dog tags jingled from behind a closed door at the end of the hall.
Emma turned and gazed at a bedroom door. Pictures of supermodels on a Parisian catwalk and James Blake and Andy Roddick playing at Wimbledon hung at eye level, and a pink-glitter placard that said SUTTON swung from the knob. Bingo. Emma pushed gently at the door. It gave way easily and soundlessly.
The room was fragrant with notes of mint, lily of the valley, and fabric softener. Moonlight streamed through the window and spilled across a perfectly made four-poster bed. A giraffe-print rug sat to its left, and an egg chair in the corner was strewn with T-shirts, bikini tops, and a few balled-up pairs of sports socks. On the windowsills were candles in big glass jars, blue, green, and brown wine bottles with flowers protruding from their mouths, and a bunch of empty Valrhona French chocolate wrappers. Every available surface was covered with pillows—there were at least ten on the bed, three on the chair, and even a couple of others strewn around on the floor. A long, white-wood desk held a sleeping MacBook Air laptop and a printer. A single card that said SUTTON’S EIGHTEENTH BIRTHDAY BASH! FABULOUSNESS REQUIRED! was propped up next to the mouse. A filing cabinet beneath the desk had a big pink padlock on the handle and a sticker that said THE L GAME. Was that like The L Word?
But there was one crucial thing missing, Emma thought. Sutton.
Of course I was missing. I gazed around the quiet room along with Emma, hoping it might spark a memory—or a clue. Was there a reason the window that faced the backyard was halfway open? Had I deliberately left a copy of Teen Vogue open to an article about Fashion Week in London? I couldn’t remember reading that issue, let alone why I’d stopped at that page. I couldn’t remember any of the items in this room, all the things that used to be mine.
Emma checked her phone again. No new messages. She wanted to look around the house, but what if she bumped into something . . . or someone? She reached for her phone and composed a new text to Sutton’s number: I’M IN YOUR BEDROOM NOW. WHEREVER YOU ARE, TEXT ME BACK TO LET ME KNOW YOU’RE OKAY. I’M WORRIED.
She pressed SEND. A split second later, a muffled ding-dong emanated from across the room, which made Emma jump. She moved in the direction of the sound, a silver clutch bag next to the computer. She unzipped it. Inside was an iPhone in a pink case and a blue Kate Spade wallet. Emma pulled out the phone and gasped. The text she’d just written glowed on the screen.
She immediately began to scroll through the day’s texts. There was the last one Emma had sent. Above that, at 8:20, was a text from Laurel Mercer, Sutton’s sister: THANKS FOR NOTHING, BITCH.
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Sara Shepard
From the author of the New York Times bestselling PRETTY LITTLE LIARS comes a killer series, THE LYING GAME.Sutton Mercer had a life anyone would kill for – and someone did. But thanks to a view from the afterlife and Emma Paxton, her long-lost twin sister, Sutton has a chance to solve her own murder. Emma slips into Sutton’s old life to piece together her disappearance. But can Emma keep up the charade long enough to discover what really happened to Sutton…or will she become the next victim?Let the lying games begin.
THE
LYING
GAME
BY
SARA
SHEPARD
We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.
—KURT VONNEGUT
Contents
Cover (#u64adf709-1f71-5ac1-8207-94b16b68cd5e)
Title Page (#u90b90dd2-c65b-5c1b-a52c-9e0c7df5974e)
Epigraph (#u870eb88e-cee9-5f66-a2d3-4d101af68b2c)
PROLOGUE
Chapter 1 - THE DEAD RINGER
Chapter 2 - THAT’S RIGHT, BLAME THE FOSTER KID
Chapter 3 - YOU KNOW IT’S TRUE IF YOU READ IT ON FACEBOOK
Chapter 4 - REUNION INTERRUPTED
Chapter 5 - SHE IS ME
Chapter 6 - WHO CAN RESIST A BROODER?
Chapter 7 - THE BEDROOM EMMA NEVER HAD
Chapter 8 - COFFEE, MUFFINS, MISTAKEN IDENTITY . . .
Chapter 9 - IMITATION IS THE HIGHEST FORM OF FLATTERY
Chapter 10 - EVERY GUY LOVES A FELON
Chapter 11 - WATCH OUT FOR DEVIL CHILD!
Chapter 12 - EMMA’S FIRST FAMILY DINNER DYSFUNCTION
Chapter 13 - THE BODY ON THE GROUND
Chapter 14 - VINTAGE EMMA
Chapter 15 - THE SCENE OF THE CRIME
Chapter 16 - LAST BUS TO VEGAS
Chapter 17 - NEVER HAVE I EVER
Chapter 18 - WHO’S LAUGHING NOW?
Chapter 19 - LEAVING IS NOT AN OPTION
Chapter 20 - DEAR DIARY, TODAY I DIED
Chapter 21 - UNREQUITED SPYING
Chapter 22 - DIRTY SECRETS
Chapter 23 - SOMEONE WAS A VERY, VERY BAD GIRL . . .
Chapter 24 - DOESN’T EVERY GIRL THINK HER SISTER WANTS TO KILL HER?
Chapter 25 - A LATE ADDITION TO THE GUEST LIST
Chapter 26 - A FACE FROM THE PAST
Chapter 27 - HAPPY BIRTHDAY, NOW DIE
Chapter 28 - SEDUCTION AND MURDER ALWAYS GO HAND IN HAND
Chapter 29 - THE GREAT ESCAPE
Chapter 30 - SOMEONE KNOWS . . .
Chapter 31 - NOT FUNNY, BITCHES
Chapter 32 - THE BITTER TRUTH
Chapter 33 - LOOK OUT, SUTTON’S BACK
EPILOGUE
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Also by Sara Shepard
Copyright
About the Publisher (#litres_trial_promo)
PROLOGUE
I woke up in a dingy claw-foot bathtub in an unfamiliar pink-tiled bathroom. A stack of Maxims sat next to the toilet, green toothpaste globbed in the sink, and white drips streaked the mirror. The window showed a dark sky and a full moon. What day of the week was it? Where was I? A frat house at the U of A? Someone’s apartment? I could barely remember that my name was Sutton Mercer, or that I lived in the foothills of Tucson, Arizona. I had no idea where my purse was, and I didn’t have a clue where I’d parked my car. Actually, what kind of car did I drive? Had someone slipped me something?
“Emma?” a guy’s voice called from another room. “You home?”
“I’m busy!” called a voice close by.
A tall, thin girl opened the bathroom door, her tangled dark hair hanging in her face. “Hey!” I leapt to my feet. “Someone’s in here already!” My body felt tingly, as if it had fallen asleep. When I looked down, it seemed like I was flickering on and off, like I was under a strobe light. Freaky. Someone definitely slipped me something.
The girl didn’t seem to hear me. She stumbled forward, her face covered in shadows.
“Hello?” I cried, climbing out of the tub. She didn’t look over. “Are you deaf?” Nothing. She pumped a bottle of lavender-scented lotion and rubbed it on her arms.
The door flung open again, and a snub-nosed, unshaven teenage guy burst in. “Oh.” His gaze flew to the girl’s tight-fitting T-shirt, which said NEW YORK NEW YORK ROLLER COASTER on the front. “I didn’t know you were in here, Emma.”
“That’s maybe why the door was closed?” Emma pushed him out and slammed it shut. She turned back to the mirror. I stood right behind her. “Hey!” I cried again.
Finally, she looked up. My eyes darted to the mirror to meet her gaze. But when I looked into the glass, I screamed.
Because Emma looked exactly like me.
And I wasn’t there.
Emma turned and walked out of the bathroom, and I followed as if something was yanking me along behind her. Who was this girl? Why did we look the same? Why was I invisible? And why couldn’t I remember, well, anything? The wrong memories snapped into aching, nostalgic focus—the glittering sunset over the Catalinas, the smell of the lemon trees in my backyard in the morning, the feel of cashmere slippers on my toes. But other things, the most important things, had become muffled and fuzzy, as if I’d lived my whole life underwater. I saw vague shapes, but I couldn’t make out what they were. I couldn’t remember what I’d done for any summer vacations, who my first kiss had been with, or what it felt like to feel the sun on my face or dance to my favorite song. What was my favorite song? And even worse, every second that passed, things got fuzzier and fuzzier. Like they were disappearing.
Like I was disappearing.
But then I concentrated really hard and I heard a muffled scream. And suddenly it was like I was somewhere else. I felt pain shooting through my body, before a final, sleepy sensation of my muscles surrendering. As my eyes slowly closed, I saw a blurry, shadowy figure standing over me.
“Oh my God,” I whispered.
No wonder Emma didn’t see me. No wonder I wasn’t in the mirror. I wasn’t really here.
I was dead.
Chapter 1
THE DEAD RINGER
Emma Paxton carried her canvas tote and a glass of iced tea out the back door of her new foster family’s home on the outskirts of Las Vegas. Cars swished and grumbled on the nearby expressway, and the air smelled heavily of exhaust and the local water treatment plant. The only decorations in the backyard were dusty free weights, a rusted bug zapper, and kitschy terra-cotta statues.
It was a far cry from my backyard in Tucson, which was desert-landscaped to perfection and had a wooden swing set I used to pretend was a castle. Like I said, it was weird and random which details I still remembered and which ones had evaporated away. For the last hour, I’d been following Emma trying to make sense of her life and willing myself to remember my own. Not like I had a choice. Everywhere she went, I went. I wasn’t entirely sure how I knew these things about Emma, either—they just appeared in my head as I watched her, like a text message popping up in an inbox. I knew the details of her life better than I did my own.
Emma dropped the tote on the faux wrought-iron patio table, plopped down in a plastic lawn chair, and craned her neck upward. The only nice thing about this patio was that it faced away from the casinos, offering a large swath of clear, uninterrupted sky. The moon dangled halfway up the horizon, a bloated alabaster wafer. Emma’s gaze drifted to two bright, familiar stars to the east. At nine years old, Emma had wistfully named the star on the right the Mom Star, the star on the left the Dad Star, and the smaller, brightly twinkling spot just below them the Emma Star. She’d made up all kinds of fairy tales about these stars, pretending that they were her real family and that one day they’d all be reunited on earth like they were in the sky.
Emma had been in foster care for most of her life. She’d never met her dad, but she remembered her mother, with whom she had lived until she was five years old. Her mom’s name was Becky. She was a slender woman who loved shouting out the answers to Wheel of Fortune, dancing around the living room to Michael Jackson songs, and reading tabloids that ran stories like BABY BORN FROM PUMPKIN! and BAT BOY LIVES! Becky used to send Emma on scavenger hunts around their apartment complex, the prize always being a tube of used lipstick or a mini Snickers. She bought Emma frilly tutus and lacy dresses from Goodwill for dress-up. She read Emma Harry Potter before bed, making up different voices for every character.
But Becky was like a scratch-off lottery ticket—Emma never quite knew what she was going to get with her. Sometimes Becky spent the whole day crying on the couch, her face contorted and her cheeks streaked with tears. Other times she would drag Emma to the nearest department store and buy her two of everything. “Why do I need two pairs of the same shoes?” Emma would ask. A faraway look would come over Becky’s face. “In case the first pair gets dirty, Emmy.”
Becky could be very forgetful, too—like the time she left Emma at a Circle K. Suddenly unable to breathe, Emma had watched her mother’s car vanish down the shimmering highway. The clerk on duty gave Emma an orange Popsicle and let her sit on the ice freezer at the front of the store while he made some phone calls. When Becky finally returned, she scooped up Emma and gave her a huge hug. For once, she didn’t even complain when Emma dripped sticky orange Popsicle goo on her dress.
One summer night not long after that, Emma slept over with Sasha Morgan, a friend from kindergarten. She woke up in the morning to Mrs. Morgan standing in the doorway, a sick look on her face. Apparently, Becky had left a note under the Morgans’ front door, saying she’d “gone on a little trip.” Some trip that was—it had lasted almost thirteen years and counting.
When no one could track down Becky, Sasha’s parents turned Emma over to an orphanage in Reno. Prospective adopters had no interest in a five-year-old—they all wanted babies they could mold into mini versions of themselves—so Emma lived in group homes, then foster homes. Though Emma would always love her mom, she couldn’t say she missed her—at least not Miserable Becky, Manic Becky, or the Lunatic Becky who’d forgotten her at the Circle K. She did miss the idea of a mom though: someone stable and constant who knew her past, looked forward to her future, and loved her unconditionally. Emma had invented the Mom, Dad, and Emma stars in the sky not based on anything she’d ever known, but instead on what she wished she’d had.
The sliding glass door opened, and Emma wheeled around. Travis, her new foster mom’s eighteen-year-old son, strutted out and settled on top of the patio table. “Sorry about bursting in on you in the bathroom,” he said.
“It’s okay,” Emma muttered bitterly, slowly inching away from Travis’s outstretched legs. She was pretty sure Travis wasn’t sorry. He practically made a sport of trying to see her naked. Today, Travis wore a blue ball cap pulled low over his eyes, a ratty, oversized plaid shirt, and baggy jean shorts with the crotch sagging almost to his knees. There was patchy stubble on his pointy-nosed, thin-lipped, pea-eyed face; he wasn’t man enough to actually grow facial hair. His bloodshot brown eyes narrowed lasciviously. Emma could feel his gaze on her, canvassing her tight-fitting NEW YORK NEW YORK camisole, bare, tanned arms, and long legs.
With a grunt, Travis reached into his shirt pocket, pulled out a joint, and lit up. As he blew a plume of smoke in her direction, the bug zapper glowed to life. With a crisp snap and a fizzle of blue light, it annihilated yet another mosquito. If only it could do that to Travis, too.
Back off, pot breath, Emma wanted to say. It’s no wonder no girl will get near you. But she bit her tongue; the comment would have to go into her Comebacks I Should’ve Said file, a list she’d compiled in a black cloth notebook hidden in her top drawer. The Comebacks list, CISS for short, was filled with pithy, snarky remarks Emma had longed to say to foster moms, creepy neighbors, bitchy girls at school, and a whole host of others. For the most part, Emma held her tongue—it was easier to keep quiet, not make trouble, and become whatever type of girl a situation needed her to be. Along the way, Emma had picked up some pretty impressive coping skills: At age ten, she honed her reflexes when Mr. Smythe, a tempestuous foster parent, got into one of his object-throwing moods. When Emma lived in Henderson with Ursula and Steve, the two hippies who grew their own food but were clueless about how to cook it, Emma had begrudgingly taken over kitchen duties, whipping up zucchini bread, veggie gratins, and some awesome stir-fries.
It had been just two months since Emma had moved in with Clarice, a single mom who worked as a bartender for VIP gamblers at The M Resort. Since then, Emma had spent the summer taking pictures, playing marathon games of Minesweeper on the banged-up BlackBerry her friend Alex had given her before she’d left her last foster home in Henderson, and working part-time operating the roller coaster at the New York New York casino. And, oh yeah, avoiding Travis as much as she could.
It hadn’t started out that way, though. At first, Emma had tried to make nice with her new foster brother, hoping they could be friends. It wasn’t like every foster family sucked and she’d never made friends with the other kids; it just sometimes took a lot of effort on her part. She’d feigned interest in all of the YouTube videos Travis watched about how to be a small-time thug: how to unlock a car with a cell phone, how to hack soda machines, how to open a padlock with a beer can. She’d suffered through a couple of Ultimate Fighting Championship matches on TV, even attempting to learn the wrestling-move vocabulary. But the nicety had ended for Emma a week later, when Travis tried to feel her up while she was standing in front of the open fridge. “You’ve been so friendly,” he’d murmured in her ear, before Emma had “accidentally” kicked him in the crotch.
All Emma wanted to do was get through her senior year here. It was the end of August, and school started on Wednesday. She had the option of leaving Clarice’s when she turned eighteen in two weeks, but that would mean quitting school, finding an apartment, and getting a full-time job to pay rent. Clarice had told Emma’s social worker that Emma could stay here until she got her diploma. Nine more months, Emma chanted to herself like a mantra. She could hold on until then, couldn’t she?
Travis took another hit off the joint. “You want some?” he asked in a choked voice, holding the smoke in his lungs.
“No thanks,” Emma said stiffly.
Travis finally exhaled. “Sweet little Emma,” he said in a syrupy voice. “But you aren’t always this good, are you?”
Emma craned her neck up at the sky and paused on the Mom, Dad, and Emma stars again. Farther down the horizon was a star she’d recently named the Boyfriend Star. It seemed to be hovering closer than usual to the Emma Star tonight—maybe it was a sign. Perhaps this would be the year she’d meet her perfect boyfriend, someone she was destined to be with.
“Shit,” Travis whispered suddenly, noticing something inside the house. He quickly stubbed out the joint and threw it under Emma’s chair just as Clarice appeared on the back deck. Emma scowled at the joint’s smoldering tip—nice of Travis to try to pin it on her—and covered it with her shoe.
Clarice still had on her work uniform: a tuxedo jacket, silky white shirt, and black bow tie. Her dyed blond hair was slicked into an impeccable French twist, and her mouth was smeared with bright fuchsia lipstick that didn’t flatter anyone’s skin tone. She held a white envelope in her hands.
“I’m missing two hundred and fifty dollars,” Clarice announced flatly. The empty envelope crinkled. “It was a personal tip from Bruce Willis. He signed one of the bills. I was going to put it in my scrapbook.”
Emma sighed sympathetically. The only thing she’d gleaned about Clarice was that she was absolutely obsessed with celebrities. She kept a scrapbook describing every celeb interaction she’d ever had, and glossy signed head shots lined the wall space in the breakfast nook. Occasionally, Clarice and Emma ran into each other in the kitchen around noon, which was the crack of dawn for Clarice after a bar shift. The only thing Clarice ever wanted to talk about was how she’d had a long conversation with the latest winner of American Idol the night before, or how a certain action film starlet’s boobs were definitely fake, or how the host of a dating reality show was kind of a bitch. Emma was always intrigued. She didn’t care much about celebrity dirt but dreamed of someday being an investigative journalist. Not that she ever told Clarice that. Not that Clarice had ever asked anything personal about her.
“The money was in this envelope in my bedroom when I left for work this afternoon.” Clarice stared straight at Emma, her eyes squinting. “Now it’s not. Is there something you want to tell me?”
Emma sneaked a peek at Travis, but he was fiddling with his BlackBerry. As he scrolled through his photos, Emma noticed a blurry shot of her at the bathroom mirror. Her hair was wet, and she’d knotted a towel under her arms.
Cheeks burning, Emma turned to Clarice. “I don’t know anything about it,” she said in the most diplomatic voice she could muster. “But maybe you should ask Travis. He might know.”
“Excuse me?” Travis’s voice cracked. “I didn’t take any money.”
Emma made an incredulous noise at the back of her throat.
“You know I wouldn’t do that, Mom,” Travis went on. He stood and pulled up his shorts around his waist. “I know how hard you work. I did see Emma go into your room today though.”
“What?” Emma whirled around to face him. “I did not!”
“Did too,” Travis shot back. As soon as he turned his back on his mom, his expression morphed from a fake smile to a wrinkled-nose, narrowed-eyes glower.
Emma gaped. It was amazing how calmly he lied. “I’ve seen you go through your mom’s purse,” she announced.
Clarice leaned against the table, twisting her mouth to the right. “Travis did that?”
“No, I didn’t.” Travis pointed accusingly at Emma. “Why would you believe her? You don’t even know this girl.”
“I don’t need money!” Emma pressed her hands to her chest. “I have a job! I’m fine!” She’d been working for years. Before the roller coaster, she’d had a job as Head Goat Girl at a local petting zoo, she’d dressed up as a toga-robed Statue of Liberty and stood on the street corner to advertise a local credit union, and she’d even sold knives door-to-door. She’d saved more than two grand and stashed it in a half-empty Tampax box in her bedroom. Travis hadn’t found the money yet, probably because the tampons were a better security system against creepy boys than a rabid pack of Rottweilers.
Clarice gazed at Travis, who was giving her a sickening, pouty smile. As she creased the empty envelope back and forth in her hands, a suspicious look crossed her face. It looked as if she momentarily saw through Travis’s facade.
“Look.” Travis walked over to his mom and put his arm on her shoulder. “I think you need to know what Emma’s really all about.” He pulled his BlackBerry from his pocket again and began to fiddle with the click wheel.
“What do you mean?” Emma walked over to them.
Travis gave her a sanctimonious look, hiding the BlackBerry screen from view. “I was going to talk to you about this in private. But it’s too late for that now.”
“Talk to me about what?” Emma lunged forward, making the citronella candle in the center of the table wobble.
“You know what.” Travis tapped away on the keyboard with his thumbs. A mosquito buzzed around his head, but he didn’t bother to flick it away. “You’re a sick freak.”
“What do you mean, Travis?” Clarice’s fuchsia-lined lips pursed worriedly.
Finally, Travis lowered the BlackBerry so everyone could see. “This,” he announced.
A stiff, hot wind blew against Emma’s cheek, the dusty air irritating her eyes. The blue-black evening sky seemed to darken a few shades. Travis breathed heavily next to her, reeking of pot smoke, and pulled up a generic video uploading site. With a flourish, he typed in the keyword SuttonInAZ and hit PLAY.
A video slowly loaded. A handheld camera panned over a clearing. No sound escaped from the speakers, as if the microphone had been muted. The camera whipped around to show a figure sitting in a chair with a black blindfold covering half her face. A round silver locket on a thick chain clung to a bony, feminine collarbone.
The girl thrashed her head frantically back and forth, the locket bouncing wildly. The picture went dark for a moment, and suddenly someone slipped behind her and pulled the necklace chain back so that it pressed up against the girl’s throat. The girl’s head arched back. She flailed her arms and kicked her legs.
“Oh my God.” Clarice’s hand flew to her mouth.
“What is this?” Emma whispered.
The strangler pulled the chain harder and harder. Whoever it was had a mask over his head, so Emma couldn’t see his face. After about thirty seconds, the girl in the video stopped struggling and went limp.
Emma backed away from the screen. Had they just watched someone die? What the hell? And what did this have to do with her?
The camera remained fixed on the blindfolded girl. She wasn’t moving. Then the picture went momentarily dark again. When an image snapped back on the screen, the camera was tilted over, fallen on the ground. Emma could still see a sideways shot of the figure in the chair. Someone walked up to the girl and pulled the blindfold off her head. After a long pause, the girl coughed. Tears dotted her eyes. The corners of her mouth pulled down. She blinked slowly. For a split second before the screen went dark, she stared half consciously into the lens.
Emma’s jaw dropped to her worn Converse sneakers.
Clarice gasped loudly.
“Ha,” Travis said triumphantly. “I told you.”
Emma stared at the girl’s huge, blue eyes, slightly upturned nose, and round face. She looked exactly like her.
That was because the girl in the video was me.
Chapter 2
THAT’S RIGHT, BLAME THE FOSTER KID
Emma grabbed the phone from Travis’s hands and started the clip over, staring hard at the image. As the person reached out and began to choke the blindfolded girl, fear streaked through Emma’s stomach. When the anonymous hand pulled off the blindfold, Emma’s identical face appeared on the screen. Emma had the same thick, wavy, chestnut-brown hair as the girl in the movie. The same round chin. The same pink lips kids used to tease Emma about, saying they were puffy as though she’d had an allergic reaction. She shuddered.
I watched the video again in horror, too. The locket glinting in the light caused a tiny shard of a memory to surface: I remembered lifting the lid of my baby box, pulling out the locket from under a half-chewed teething giraffe, a lacy receiving blanket, and a pair of knit booties, and putting it around my neck. The video itself brought back nothing though. I didn’t know if it had happened in my backyard . . . or three states away. I wished I could slap my post-death memory across the face.
But the video had to be how I died, right? Especially from that quick flashback I’d had when I’d awakened in Emma’s bathroom: that face close to mine, my heart beating hard, my murderer standing above me. But I had no idea how this whole death thing worked: Had I popped into Emma’s world the moment after I’d taken my last breath, or was it days—months—later? And how did the video get posted online? Had my family seen it? My friends? Was this some kind of twisted ransom note?
Emma finally glanced up from the screen. “Where did you find this?” she asked Travis.
“Guess someone didn’t know she was a star on the Internet, huh?” Travis snatched the phone from her hands.
Clarice raked her fingers through her hair. She kept glancing from the video screen to Emma’s face. “Is this what you do for fun?” she asked Emma in a hoarse voice.
“She probably does it to get high.” Travis paced around the patio like a prowling lion. “I knew some girls at school last year who were, like, obsessed with it. One of them almost died.”
Clarice clapped her hand over her mouth. “What’s wrong with you?”
Emma’s eyes darted from Travis to Clarice. “Wait, no. That’s not me. The girl in this video is someone else.”
Travis rolled his eyes. “Someone who looks exactly like you?” he deadpanned. “Let me guess. A long-lost sister? An evil twin?”
There was a low rumbling of thunder in the distance. The breeze smelled like wet pavement, a telltale sign that a storm was close. A long-lost sister. The idea ignited in Emma’s mind like a Fourth of July sparkler. It was possible. She’d asked Social Services once if Becky had had any other kids she’d abandoned along the way, but they said they didn’t know.
A thought burned in my mind, too: I was adopted. That much I remembered. It was common knowledge in my family; my parents had never tried to hide it. They’d told me my adoption had been a last-minute scramble and they’d never met my birth mother. Could it be possible? It explained why I was literally stuck to this girl who looked just like me, following her around as if our souls had been tethered together.
Clarice tapped her long nails on the table. “I don’t tolerate lying or stealing in this house, Emma.”
Emma felt like she’d just been kicked in the stomach. “That’s not me in the video,” she protested. “And I didn’t steal from you. I swear.”
Emma reached for her canvas bag on the patio table. All she had to do was call Eddie, her manager at the roller coaster. He’d vouch for her hours today. But Travis got to her bag first, knocking it over so all of its contents spilled out onto the pavement.
“Oops!” he cried gleefully.
Emma watched helplessly as her tattered copy of The Sun Also Rises landed on a dusty anthill. A crumpled ticket for a free all-you-can-eat BBQ buffet at MGM Grand got caught in the breeze and drifted toward Travis’s free weights. Her BlackBerry and a tube of cherry-flavored ChapStick skittered to a stop next to a terra-cotta turtle. Last but not least, there was a suspicious-looking wad of bills held together with a thick purple rubber band. The wad thudded to the patio, bounced once, and landed in front of Clarice’s chunky heels.
Emma was too stunned to speak. Clarice snatched the money and licked her pointer finger to count it. “Two hundred,” she said when she was finished. She held up a twenty with blue scribble in the upper left-hand corner. Even in the fading light, Emma could see a big looped B, presumably for Bruce Willis. “What did you do with the other fifty?”
A neighbor’s wind chimes tinkled in the distance. Emma’s insides were frozen. “I-I have no idea how that got in my bag.”
Behind her, Travis snickered. “Busted.” He was leaning casually against the stucco wall, just to the left of the big round thermometer. He crossed his arms over his chest, and his top lip was curled in a sneer.
The hair on the back of Emma’s neck rose. All at once, she understood what was going on. Her lips started to twitch, just like they always did when she was about to lose it. “You did this!” She pointed a finger at Travis. “You set me up!”
Travis smirked. Something inside Emma broke loose. Screw keeping the peace. Screw adapting to whatever the foster family needed her to be. She shot for him, grabbing Travis by his meaty neck.
“Emma!” Clarice shrieked, pulling her off her son. Emma staggered backward, bumping against one of the patio chairs.
Clarice spun Emma around so that they were face-to-face. “What’s gotten into you?”
Emma didn’t answer. She glowered at Travis again. He had flattened himself against the wall, his arms in front of him protectively, but there was a thrilled glow in his eyes.
Clarice turned away from Emma, sank down in the chair, and rubbed her eyes. Mascara smudged on her fingertips. “This isn’t working,” she said softly after a moment. She raised her head and gazed soberly at Emma. “I thought you were a sweet, nice girl who wouldn’t cause any trouble, Emma, but this is too much for us.”
“I didn’t do anything,” Emma whispered. “I swear.”
Clarice pulled out a nail file and started nervously sawing on her pinkie. “You can stay until your birthday, but after that you’re on your own.”
Emma blinked. “You’re kicking me out?”
Clarice stopped filing. Her face softened. “I’m sorry,” she said gently. “But this is the best choice for all of us.”
Emma turned away and stared hard at the ugly block wall at the back of the property.
“I wish things were different.” Clarice pulled the sliding door open and padded back into the house. As soon as she was out of view, Travis peeled himself off the wall and straightened up to full height.
He sauntered casually around Emma, scooped up the tiny nub of the joint that was still under the chair, blew off the bits of dried grass that had stuck to the tip, and dropped it into his enormous pants pocket. “You’re lucky she didn’t press charges,” he said in a slimy voice.
Emma said nothing as he swaggered back into the house. She wanted to leap up and claw his eyes out, but her legs felt like they had been filled with heavy wet clay. Her eyes blurred with tears. This again. Every time a foster family told Emma she had to move on, she invariably thought back to the cold, lonely moment when she’d realized Becky had ditched her for good. Emma had stayed a week at Sasha Morgan’s house while the police tried to track down her mom. She’d put on a brave face, playing Candy Land, watching Dora the Explorer, and making scavenger hunts for Sasha like the ones Becky had masterminded for her. But every night in the glow of Sasha’s Cinderella night-light, Emma struggled to read the parts of Harry Potter she could understand—which weren’t many. She’d barely mastered The Cat in the Hat. She needed her mom to read the big words. She needed her mom to do the voices. Even now, it still hurt.
The patio was silent. The wind blew the hanging spider plants and palm trees sideways. Emma stared blankly at the terra-cotta sculpture of a shapely woman that Travis and his friends liked to dry-hump. So that was that. No more staying here until the end of high school. No more applying to a photojournalism program at USC . . . or even community college. She had nowhere to go. No one to turn to. Unless . . .
Suddenly, the image from the video fluttered through her mind once more. A long-lost sister. Her heart lifted. She had to find her.
If only I could have told her it was too late.
Chapter 3
YOU KNOW IT’S TRUE IF YOU READ IT ON FACEBOOK
An hour later, Emma stood in her little bedroom, her Army-Navy bags splayed open on the floor. Why wait to pack? She also held her phone to her ear, talking to Alexandra Stokes, her best friend from back in Henderson.
“You could always stay with me,” Alex offered after Emma finished telling her that Clarice had just kicked her out. “I can talk to my mom. She might be cool with it.”
Emma shut her eyes. She and Alex had been on the cross-country team together last year. They’d both wiped out on a downhill part of a trail run on the first day of practice, and they’d become fast friends while the nurse cleaned their wounds with ultra-stingy hydrogen peroxide. She and Emma had spent their entire junior year sneaking into the casinos and taking pictures of celebrities and lookalikes with Alex’s Canon SLR, trolling the pawn shops but never buying anything, and sunning themselves at Lake Mead on weekends.
“That’s a lot to ask of your family.” Emma removed a pile of vintage T-shirts from her top drawer and plopped them into the duffel. She’d stayed with the Stokeses for a couple of weeks after Ursula and Steve relocated to the Florida Keys. Emma had had a great time, but Ms. Stokes was a single mom with enough to manage already.
“It’s crazy for Clarice to kick you out,” Alex said. Soft smacking sounds filled the receiver; she was probably chomping on a piece of chocolate Twizzlers, her favorite candy. “She can’t honestly think you stole that money.”
“Actually, it wasn’t just that.” Emma scooped up a stack of jeans and tossed them in the bag, too.
“Was there something else?” Alex asked.
Emma picked at a loose military patch on the old duffel. “I can’t get into it right now.” She didn’t want to tell Alex about the video she’d seen. She wanted to keep it to herself for a little while longer, just in case it wasn’t real. “But I’ll explain soon, okay? I promise.”
After Emma hung up, she sat on the carpet and looked around. She’d pulled all her photography prints by Margaret Bourke-White and Annie Leibovitz off the walls and her collection of classic novels and sci-fi thrillers off the shelves; the place now looked like a pay-by-the-hour motel room. She stared into the open bureau drawer, which contained her favorite things, the stuff she carried to every foster home. There was the hand-knitted monster toy Mrs. Hewes, a piano teacher, had given her the day she’d mastered “Für Elise” despite not actually having a piano at home to practice on. She’d saved a couple of scavenger hunt clues from Becky, the creases soft and the paper nearly disintegrating. And there was Socktopus, the threadbare stuffed octopus Becky had bought for Emma during a road trip to Four Corners. Nestled at the bottom of the drawer were her five cloth-bound journals, stuffed with poetry, the Comebacks I Should’ve Said list, the Ways to Flirt (WTF) list, the Stuff I Love and Hate list, and a thorough review of every secondhand store in the area. Emma had mastered the thrift store circuit. She knew exactly which days new shipments hit the floor, how to haggle for better prices, and to always paw through the bottom of the shoe bin—she’d once scored a barely scuffed pair of Kate Spade flats that way.
Finally, Emma lifted the battered Polaroid camera and a large stack of Polaroid photos from the corner of the drawer. The camera had been Becky’s, but Emma had brought it with her to Sasha’s house the night her mom had taken off. Not long after that, Emma had begun to write fake news captions to match the photos about her life and the goings-on of her foster families: “Foster Mom Gets Sick of Kids, Locks Self in Bedroom to Watch Leave It to Beaver.” “Hippies Leave for Florida Unannounced.” “Semi-decent Foster Mom Gets Job in Hong Kong; Foster Kid Not Invited.” She was the one and only reporter on the Emma beat. If she were in the right mind-set, she’d craft a new top story for today: “Evil Foster Brother Ruins Girl’s Life.” Or maybe “Girl Discovers Doppelgänger on Internet. Perhaps a Long-Lost Sister?”
Emma paused at the thought. She glanced at the tattered Dell laptop on the floor, which she’d bought from a pawn shop. Taking a deep breath, she set it on the bed and opened the lid. The screen glowed to life, and Emma quickly called up the video site where Travis had found the fake strangling film. The familiar video was the very first item on the list. It had been posted earlier that evening.
Emma pressed PLAY, and the grainy image appeared. The blindfolded girl bucked and scratched. The dark figure pulled the necklace taut around her neck. Then the camera fell, and someone emerged and whipped off the blindfold. The girl’s face was ashen and dazed. She looked around frantically, her eyes rolling around in her head like loose marbles. Then she looked at the camera. Her blue-green eyes were glassy and her pink lips glowed. It was Emma’s exact face. Everything about it was the same.
“Who are you?” Emma whispered, a shiver running up her spine.
I wished I could answer her. I wished I could do something useful instead of just dangling over her silently like a creepy ghost-stalker. It was like watching a movie, except I couldn’t even call out or throw popcorn at the screen.
The clip ended, and the site asked Emma if she wanted to replay it. The bed springs squeaked as she shifted her weight, thinking. After a moment, she typed SuttonInAz into a Google search. A few sites popped up instantly, including a Facebook page by the same name. SUTTON MERCER, it said. TUCSON, ARIZONA.
Screeching tires out the window sounded like a cackle. The Facebook page loaded, and Emma gasped. There was Sutton Mercer, standing in a foyer of a house with a bunch of girls by her side. She wore a black halter-style dress, a sparkly headband, and silver high heels. Emma blinked at her face, feeling queasy. She leaned in closer, certain she would see a difference that would set Sutton apart from herself, but everything, down to Sutton’s petite ears and the same perfectly square, perfectly straight teeth, was identical.
The more Emma thought about it, the more she could believe she had a long-lost twin. For one thing, there were certain times in life where she felt accompanied, as if someone was watching her. Sometimes she woke up in the morning after having crazy dreams about a girl who looked like her . . . but she knew it wasn’t her. The dreams were always vivid: riding on a sun-dappled Appaloosa at someone’s farm, dragging a dark-haired doll across a patio. Besides, if Becky was irresponsible enough to forget Emma at the Circle K, maybe she’d done the same thing with another baby. Perhaps all those duplicate pairs of shoes Manic Becky bought weren’t for Emma at all, but for Emma’s twin sister, a girl Becky had already abandoned.
Perhaps Emma was right, I thought. Perhaps they’d been for me.
Emma moved the mouse over the girls standing next to Sutton in the photo. MADELINE VEGA, said a small pop-up tag. Madeline had sleek black hair, huge brown eyes, a willowy build, and a gap between her front teeth, just like Madonna. Her head tilted suggestively to one side. There was a fake—or perhaps real?—tattoo of a rose on the inside of her wrist, and her bloodred dress plunged provocatively to her breast bone.
The girl next to Madeline was a redhead named Charlotte Chamberlain. She had pink, pale skin and pretty green eyes, and wore a black silk dress that tugged over her broad shoulders. Two blondes with similar wide eyes and upturned noses stood on either end of the group. Their names were Lilianna and Gabriella Fiorello; in the caption Sutton had nicknamed them THE TWITTER TWINS.
I looked over Emma’s shoulder. I recognized the girls in the photos. I understood we used to be close. But they were like books I’d read two summers ago; I knew I’d liked them, but I couldn’t tell you now what they’d been about.
Emma scrolled down the page. Most of the Facebook profile was public. Sutton Mercer was going to be a senior this year, just like Emma. She attended a school called Hollier High. Her interests were tennis, shopping at La Encantada Mall, and the Papaya Quench full body wrap at Canyon Ranch. Under LIKES AND DISLIKES, she’d written, I love Gucci more than Pucci, but not as much as Juicy. Emma frowned at the line.
Yeah, I had no idea what it meant, either.
Next, Emma clicked on the photo page and peered at a picture of a bunch of girls in tennis polos, skirts, and sneakers. A plaque that said HOLLIER TENNIS TEAM rested at their feet. Emma rolled the mouse over the girls’ names until she found Sutton’s. She stood third from the left, her hair pulled back tautly into a smooth ponytail. Emma moved the mouse to the dark-haired Indian girl to the right. A tag over her head said NISHA BANERJEE. There was a saccharine, kiss-ass smile on her face.
I stared hard at her, a spotty, snapping sensation coursing through my weightless body. I knew I didn’t like Nisha, but I didn’t know why.
Next Emma looked at a shot of Sutton and Charlotte standing on the tennis courts next to a tall, handsome, graying man. There was no tag over his face, but the caption said, Me, C, and Mr. Chamberlain at Arizona Tennis Classic. After that was a shot of Sutton with her arms around a handsome, sweet-looking, blond-haired guy wearing a Hollier soccer jersey. Love ya, G! she’d written. Someone named Garrett had replied in the comments window: I love u too, Sutton.
Aw, Emma thought.
My heart warmed, too.
The last picture Emma clicked on was a shot of Sutton sitting around a patio table with two attractive, older adults and a dirty-blond, square-jawed girl named Laurel Mercer. Sutton’s adoptive sister, presumably. Everyone was grinning and holding slushy drinks in a toast. I heart the fam, the caption proclaimed.
Emma lingered on the photo for a long time, her chest aching. All of her daydreams about a Mom Star, Dad Star, and Emma Star family looked pretty much like this: an attractive, happy family, a nice house, a good life. If she cut her own head out of a snapshot and pasted it on Sutton’s body, the picture would look no different. Yet her story was as opposite from this as could be.
There were a few YouTube clips on the Facebook page, and Emma clicked on the first one. Sutton stood on what looked like a lush green golf course with Madeline and Charlotte. Everyone knelt down and vigorously shook canisters in their hands. Slowly, silently, they spray-painted designs on a large rock. WE MISS YOU, T, Madeline’s message said. Sutton’s message said NISHA WAS HERE.
“Where’s Laurel?” Charlotte asked.
“A thousand bucks says she’s too scared,” Sutton murmured on the screen. Her voice was so familiar it made Emma’s throat catch.
Emma clicked on the other videos. There was one of Sutton and her friends skydiving, another of them bungee jumping. A whole bunch of videos showed one of the girls walking around the corner unaware, and the rest of them ambushing her and making her scream. The last video was titled “Cross my heart, hope to die.” It opened with Madeline pirouetting into a pool at night. As soon as she hit the water, she started to flail. “Help!” she screamed, her dark hair plastered against her face. “I think I broke my leg! I . . . can’t . . . move!”
The camera wobbled. “Mads?” Charlotte cried out.
“Shit,” someone else said.
“Help!” Madeline continued to flail.
“Wait a minute,” Sutton’s voice called haltingly. “Did she say it?”
The camera zinged to Charlotte, frozen midstep. She held a red-and-white life preserver in her hands. “What?” she asked dazedly.
“Did she say it?” Sutton said again.
“I-I don’t think so,” Charlotte squeaked. She clamped her lips together and dropped the life preserver on the deck. “Very funny. We know you’re faking, Mads,” she yelled, annoyed. “Such a bad actress,” she said under her breath.
Madeline stopped splashing. “Fine,” she panted, paddling for the ladder. “But I had you going for a minute. Char looked like she was going to pee her pants.” Everyone cackled.
Whoa, Emma thought. So this was what they did for fun?
I was a little freaked, too.
Emma searched the rest of the Facebook profile for any references to the weird strangling video Travis had found, but there wasn’t a single mention. The only semi-spooky thing she found was a scan of a black-and-white flyer that said MISSING SINCE JUNE 17, a boy’s face grinning back at her. THAYER VEGA, it said in block letters under the photo. Emma clicked back to the names on Sutton’s profile picture. Madeline’s last name was Vega, too.
Finally, she clicked on Sutton’s Wall. Sutton had written a post just a few hours before: Ever wish you could run away? Sometimes I do. Emma frowned. Why would Sutton want to run away? It looked like she had everything.
I had no idea, but that post told me tons. If I’d written it only a few hours before, it meant I hadn’t been dead for long. Did anyone even know I’d been killed? I looked at the rest of my Wall that was visible on the screen. No RIP, Sutton notes or plans for a Sutton Mercer memorial. Maybe no one knew then. Maybe no one had found me? Was I lying in a field somewhere, my necklace still at my throat? I gazed down at my shimmering body. Even though no one else could see me, every so often I could just make out a tiny flicker of myself—a hand here, an elbow there, a pair of terry-cloth shorts and yellow FitFlops. I didn’t see any blood. My skin wasn’t blue.
Just as Emma was about to close up the computer, some more posts on Sutton’s Wall caught her eye. Can’t wait for your b-day party! Charlotte had written. It’s going to be sick! Emma’s birthday was coming up, too. She checked Sutton’s Info tab. The birthday listed was September 10, the same as Emma’s.
Her heart pounded. That was some coincidence.
I felt scared and hopeful and confused, too. Maybe it was real. Maybe we were twins.
After a moment, Emma opened a new window and logged into her own Facebook page. It looked paltry and pathetic next to Sutton’s—her profile picture was a blurry close-up of herself and Socktopus, and she only had five friends: Alex, an old foster sister named Tracy, Ben & Jerry’s Chunky Monkey, and two of the cast members from CSI. Then she found Sutton’s page again and clicked on the button that said SEND SUTTON A MESSAGE. When the window appeared, she typed: This will sound crazy, but I think we’re related. We look exactly the same, and we have the same birthday. I live in Nevada, not too far from you. You’re not by any chance adopted, are you? Write back or call if you want to talk.
MESSAGE SENT! the screen announced. Emma stared around the quiet room, the small fan on the desk blowing warmish air in her face. After the possibly life-altering thing that had just happened, she expected the world to have miraculously and drastically transformed—a leprechaun to dance through the open window, Clarice’s kitschy terra-cotta patio sculptures to come to life and start a conga line, something. But there was still the long, jagged crack in the plaster in the ceiling and the blotchy, M-shaped stain on the carpet near the closet.
The little clock in the corner of the laptop screen clicked from 10:12 to 10:13 P.M. She refreshed her Facebook page. She peeked out a slit in the dusty blinds at the night sky and found the Mom, Dad, and Emma stars. Her heart rollicked in her chest. What had she done? She reached for her phone and dialed Alex’s number, but Alex didn’t pick up. YOU THERE? she texted Alex, but there was no response.
The traffic on the highway grew sparse and whispery. Emma let out a long sigh, thinking of what came next. Maybe she could move back to Henderson, live in Alex’s spare room, and pay rent to Alex’s mom. She’d work full-time—perhaps night shifts at the twenty-four-hour Target near Alex’s house—and somehow finish high school, too. Maybe she could even intern at the local newspaper on the weekends. . . .
Bzzzzzzz.
Emma’s eyes popped open. Out the window, the moon had climbed high in the sky. The clock on the side table said 12:56 A.M. She’d dozed off.
Bzzzzzzz.
Her phone was flashing. She stared at it for a long moment, as if she was afraid it might leap up and bite her.
There was an envelope icon on the screen. Her heart churned faster and faster. Trembling, she clicked OPEN. Emma had to read the Facebook message four times before the words really sunk in.
OMG. I can’t believe this. Yes, I was totally adopted. But I never knew you existed until now. Can u meet me at the hiking base of Sabino Canyon in Tucson 2morro at 6 PM? Attached is my cell number. Don’t tell anyone who you are until we talk—it’s dangerous! See you soon!
Love, Sutton (your twin)
Of course, there was one problem with that note: I didn’t write it.
Chapter 4
REUNION INTERRUPTED
Late the following afternoon, Emma staggered off a Greyhound bus, her green duffel in tow. Heat radiated off the parking lot in waves; the air was so stifling that she felt like she’d just stepped into the barrel of a giant hair dryer. To her right were small adobe homes and a purple-stucco yoga studio for men called hOMbre. To her left was a large, crumbling building called the Hotel Congress, which looked haunted. Posters for upcoming concerts plastered the front windows. A couple of hipsters loitered on the street, smoking cigarettes. Beyond that was what looked like a shop for dominatrix hookers; whip-wielding mannequins in catsuits, fishnet stockings, and thigh-high boots filled the front windows.
Emma spun around again and faced the Greyhound bus station. TUCSON DOWNTOWN, said a low-slung sign out front. After hours of sitting on a bus next to a guy with a devil beard and a serious addiction to jalapeño-flavored Doritos, she was finally here. She was tempted to run up to the large Greyhound on the sign and give it a big, wet kiss, but then her phone vibrated in her pocket and she scrambled to answer it. Alex’s photo appeared on the screen.
“Hey!” Emma clutched the old BlackBerry to her ear. “Guess where I am?”
“You didn’t,” Alex gasped on the other end.
“I did.” Emma dragged her duffel to a bench under the awning and sat down to rest. Alex had finally written back to Emma’s YOU THERE? text last night. Emma had called her immediately, blurting out the whole story in one long, breathless sentence.
“I left Clarice a note,” Emma said, moving her long legs out of the way as an older couple pulling wheeled suitcases passed. “Social Services won’t check up on me, either—I’m too close to turning eighteen.”
“So what are you going to say to this Sutton girl? I mean, if she’s really your sister, do you think you’ll be able to move in with her?” Alex sighed wistfully. “It’s like Cinderella, except without the lame prince!”
Emma leaned back on the bench and gazed at the purplish mountains in the distance. “I don’t want to get too far ahead of things,” she said. “Let’s just see if we even get along.”
It was all an act. The entire bus ride, Emma imagined how meeting Sutton might just change her life. Maybe she could move to Tucson and go to Sutton’s school. She could get to know Sutton’s adoptive parents, too. Maybe they’ll even let me move in with them, she dared to consider. Goose bumps rose on her arms. Okay, that was a long shot, but who knew? It was like a cooler version of Cinderella.
But first things first: the meeting today. Emma spotted a single neon-green cab on the other side of the bus station and waved it over. “Please don’t tell anyone, okay?” she said to Alex.
“I promise,” Alex agreed. “Good luck.”
“Thanks.”
Emma hung up, climbed into the backseat of the cab, and gave Sabino Canyon as her destination, barely able to temper the giddiness in her voice. The cabbie pulled away and wove through Tucson’s streets. Emma stared out the grimy window, grinning at the various college buildings of the University of Arizona, including one that had PHOTOGRAPHY INSTITUTE on a big sign out front. Emma couldn’t wait to go inside and check out the exhibit. Next they passed the college green. Students loitered in the sun. A running group pranced by like a herd of deer. There was a girl dressed up as a marijuana plant in the middle of the courtyard holding a sign that said HONK 4 WEED! The cabbie honked.
Next they pulled onto Highway 10 and drove north. The houses grew larger and the streets were speckled with fancy gyms, cute bistros, gourmet markets, and upscale boutiques. Emma passed the entrance to La Encantada Mall, and then the lush Elizabeth Arden Red Door spa. Maybe Sutton and I can have a pedicure day, she thought.
Actually, that made her a little nervous. She’d never gotten a professional pedicure before. Whenever someone touched her feet, she let out a hitchy laugh like Ernie on Sesame Street.
As for me, all I felt was numbness as the car whipped past these landmarks. Certain emotions and senses flashed deep beneath the surface—vague blips of elation and thrill as we passed a restaurant called NoRTH, the smell of jasmine perfume as the cab swept past the shops at La Encantada—but nothing solid emerged. Questions buzzed in my head like a swarm of bees. Who had written back to Emma? Had anyone else discovered I was dead? I was desperate to get another look at my Facebook page, but Emma hadn’t clicked on it again. A whole day had passed since my death—maybe more; where did everyone think I was? And why hadn’t someone found my body? Then again, if someone had murdered me, I could be chopped up in a zillion pieces by now.
I wanted to cry out. I wanted to wail. But all I could do was follow Emma in a state of mute shock and panic. It was like those terrible dreams where I was falling down, down, down from the top of a tall building. I always tried to call out for someone to catch me, but no one ever answered.
The cab took a left, and a mountain rose up before Emma’s eyes. A pitted, wooden sign said SABINO CANYON. “Here you are,” the driver said, pulling to the curb.
This was it. Emma handed the cabbie a twenty and crunched across the gravel to a bench. She inhaled the jumbled scents of sunscreen, dust, and sun-baked rock. Evening hikers stretched their calves against a parking barrier a few feet away. The shimmering mountain range interrupted the blue sky. Little pinpricks of pink, yellow, and purple wildflowers dotted the trail.
It’s perfect, Emma thought. On instinct, she pulled her old Polaroid camera from the duffel. She hadn’t brought that much with her to Tucson—just her wallet, Socktopus, a change of clothes, the camera, and her journal, because she was afraid to go anywhere without it. She’d left most everything else, including her savings, in a storage locker at the Vegas bus station. The device made a churning noise as she snapped a photo. Emma watched the picture slowly develop. Long-Lost Sisters Meet for the First Time, she mentally captioned.
It was six on the dot. She sat down on a bench, pulled out a Maybelline compact, and took stock of her reflection. She wore a striped jersey Gap dress that she’d found at Cinnamon’s, a secondhand shop near Clarice’s house, and she’d smeared a lot of shiny gloss over her lips. She covertly sniffed her skin, hoping she didn’t smell like bus exhaust or jalapeño Doritos. Meeting Sutton reminded her of walking into a new foster home for the first time. The parents always gave her a long, discerning look, instantly deciding whether she passed or failed. Please like me, she always thought as she stood in countless kitchens or on interchangeable front porches. Please make this bearable. Please don’t let me have a booger hanging out of my nose.
More people emerged from the canyon trail. Emma checked the clock on her phone. It was 6:10. What if Sutton was late to everything? People like that drove Emma crazy. And what were they going to say to each other, anyway? “Hi, Sutton,” Emma mouthed, practicing a smile. “So Becky lost you, too?” She pantomimed reaching out her hand, and then shook her head and pulled back. They’d hug, wouldn’t they? What if they just stood there awkwardly, staring into space?
The strange film fluttered through her mind again. Who agreed to be strangled for fun, anyway? She thought about the girls Travis had mentioned yesterday.
“Oh!” cried someone behind her.
Emma jumped and turned around, looking at the unfamiliar man in shorts and a polo shirt standing a few feet away. With his salt-and-pepper hair and slightly round physique, he reminded Emma of Dr. Lowry, the only social worker she’d ever liked, mostly because he’d spoken to Emma like a human being and not a foster child freak. But then the photo on Facebook of Charlotte and Sutton standing on a tennis court with this guy popped into her head. Me, C, and Mr. Chamberlain at Arizona Tennis Classic. This was someone from Sutton’s world, not hers.
Not that I had much recollection of him.
There was a troubled look on the man’s face. “W-What are you doing out here, Sutton?”
Emma blinked hard, realizing what he’d called her. She gave him a wobbly smile. Her tongue felt bloated and heavy in her mouth. Don’t tell anyone who you are, the email had said. It’s dangerous.
“Um, just hanging out,” Emma answered, feeling ridiculously foolish. Her palms itched, too, just like they always did when she lied to adults.
“Are you going for a hike?” Charlotte’s dad pressed. “Is this where kids meet these days?”
Emma glanced toward the road, hoping she’d see a girl who looked just like her pulling up to the curb to clear this up. A few cars passed without stopping. A couple of kids on Schwinn cruiser bikes rode past, laughing. “Um, not exactly.”
A dog across the path let out a bark. Emma stiffened—a Chow had bitten her when she was nine, and she’d been wary of dogs ever since. But the dog was straining at a rabbit that had suddenly emerged from around the bend. Charlotte’s dad pushed his hands in his pockets. “Well, see ya. Have a nice night.” He quickly walk-jogged away.
Emma slumped on the bench. Awkward. The clock on her phone now said 6:20. She clicked onto her NEW MESSAGES folder, but there was no text saying I’M LATE, BE THERE SOON! Uneasiness began to filter through her body, poisoning everything. Her stomach felt like it was eating itself. All of a sudden, the surroundings didn’t seem quite so magical anymore. The hikers making their way back down the mountain looked like twisted, dark monsters. There was an acrid odor in the air. Something felt very, very wrong.
Crack. Emma’s head whipped around at the sound. Before she could see what it was, a small hand covered her eyes and yanked her to standing. “Wha?” Emma called out. A second hand pressed against her mouth. Emma tried to wrench away, but a hard, cold object pressed between her shoulder blades. She instantly froze. She’d never felt a gun at her back before, but this couldn’t be anything else.
“Don’t move, bitch,” whispered a husky voice. Emma felt hot breath on her neck, but all she could see was the inside of someone’s palm. “You’re coming with us.”
I wished I could see who “us” was, but that was a little wrinkle in this being-dead thing: When Emma couldn’t see, neither could I.
Chapter 5
SHE IS ME
Emma’s feet tripped beneath her, dragging on the ground. The gun dug into her skin. Dark, blurry shapes fluttered through the blindfold someone had quickly tied around her eyes, and the sound of traffic roared in her ears. She let out a panicked whimper. The freaky strangling film flashed through her mind like whirling ambulance lights. Those hands pulling that necklace taut. Sutton slumping over lifelessly.
I thought of the same thing. Terror filled me.
Someone pushed Emma across the road. A horn blared, but then Emma’s foot hit the curb on the other side. As she staggered across the sidewalk, the sound of cars yielded to loud, throbbing bass. The aroma of grilled hamburgers and hot dogs and cigarettes drifted into Emma’s nostrils. There was a loud splash. Someone giggled. Someone else cried, “Love it!” Emma’s hands twitched. Where was she?
“What the hell?”
Suddenly the scarf was ripped from Emma’s eyes. The world lit up for me again at exactly the same time. A familiar girl with long, reddish hair, pale skin, broad shoulders and a thick waist hovered in front of Emma. She wore a short blue dress with lace around the neck. Charlotte—the name came to Emma. “She’s learned her lesson already, don’t you think?” Charlotte snapped, throwing the blindfold behind a potted cactus.
Someone freed Emma’s hands from their confines behind her back. She no longer felt the gun pressed between her shoulder blades either. Emma whipped around. Three pretty girls in party dresses and sparkly makeup stood before her.
The tallest one had dark hair, jutting collarbones, a deconstructed ballerina bun, and a tattoo of a rose on the inside of her wrist. Madeline Vega, the girl in Sutton’s Facebook profile photo. Next to Madeline stood two girls with Crayola-maize hair and pale blue eyes. Both girls held iPhones. One was preppy, in a polo dress, a white headband, and wedge sandals with grosgrain ties. The other looked like she’d stepped off a Green Day video—she wore lots of eye makeup, a plaid dress, high boots, and a stack of black jelly bracelets around her wrists. They had to be Gabriella and Lilianna Fiorello, the Twitter Twins.
“Gotcha!” Madeline gave Emma a weak smile. The Twitter Twins grinned, too.
“Since when did we get all eco?” Charlotte sighed loudly behind them. “Recycling is not part of our rules.”
Madeline pulled the short, white A-line dress she was wearing down her thighs. “It wasn’t technically a repeat, Char. Sutton knew it was us the whole time.” She raised a tube of lipstick into the air, then pressed it between Emma’s shoulder blades again. “My mom’s Chihuahua would’ve known this wasn’t a gun.”
Emma wrenched away. The tube of lipstick had definitely fooled her. Then, she realized something else—Madeline had called her Sutton, just like Charlotte’s dad had. “Wait a minute,” she blurted, struggling to find her voice. “I’m not—”
Charlotte cut her off, her gaze still on Madeline. “Even if Sutton knew it was you, it’s still poor form. And you know it.” She had a sarcastic voice and a penetrating stare. Although Charlotte wasn’t the prettiest in the crowd, she was clearly the alpha. “Besides, since when do we do things like that with them?” She pointed at Gabriella and Lilianna, who lowered their eyes sheepishly.
Madeline fiddled with the leather strap of her oversized watch. “Don’t be such a hater. It was spontaneous. I saw Sutton and just . . . went for it.”
Charlotte stepped a tiny bit closer to Madeline and puffed up her chest. “We made up the rules together, remember? Or do those tight buns you wear to ballet class cut off the circulation to your brain?”
Madeline’s chin wobbled for a moment. Her big eyes, high cheekbones, and bow-shaped lips reminded Emma of a figurehead on a ship. But Emma noticed Madeline slowly massaging a hot-pink rabbit’s foot on the key ring of her bag, as if all the beauty in the world hadn’t brought her luck. “It’s better than your too-tight jeans cutting off the circulation to your butt,” Madeline shot back.
I reached out to Madeline, but my fingers slipped through her skin. “Mads?” I called out. I touched Charlotte on the shoulder. “Char?” She didn’t even flinch. Nothing new about them came back to me. I knew I loved them, but I really didn’t know why. But how could they stand there and think Emma was me? How could they not know their BFF was dead?
“Um, guys,” Emma tried again, staring across the wide avenue. The entrance to Sabino Canyon glowed beckoningly in the sunset. “There’s somewhere I need to be.”
Madeline gave her a duh look. “Uh, yeah? Nisha’s party?” She looped her arm around Emma’s elbow and yanked her toward the small wrought-iron gate that led to the backyard of the house whose driveway they stood in. “Look, I know you and Nisha have issues, but this is the last party before school tomorrow. It’s not like you have to talk to her. Where have you been anyway? We’ve been calling you all day. And what were you doing sitting in front of Sabino? You looked like a zombie.”
“It was freaky,” Lilianna piped up.
“Super freaky,” Gabriella agreed in an identical voice. Then she reached into her pocket and pulled out a small prescription bottle. Popping off the cap, she shook two pills into her hand and pushed them into her mouth, washing them down with a swig from a Diet Coke bottle. Party girl, Emma thought warily.
She stared at the four girls. Should she tell them who she really was? What if it really was dangerous? Suddenly she felt her shoulder and realized that she’d lost her duffel bag in the fake kidnapping. When she looked across the street, it was still there. She’d slip away and get it as soon as she could. And if Sutton showed up, maybe she’d see it and know Emma had been there.
“Hang on a second.” Emma stopped short next to a large flowering barrel cactus. She wriggled her arm from Madeline’s grasp and pulled her phone out of her pocket—at least it wasn’t in the duffel, too. No new messages. She shaded the screen with one hand and composed several new texts to the cell number Sutton had given Emma in her Facebook reply last night: Your friends found me. I’m at a party across the street. They think I’m you. I didn’t know what to tell them. Txt me with further instructions, K?
Emma typed quickly—she knew the third-place finish in the speed-texting contest in Vegas two years ago would come in handy someday—and pressed SEND. There. Sutton could meet her here and straighten out who was who . . . or Emma could meet her later and just pretend she was Sutton for the duration of the party.
“Who are you writing to?” Madeline leaned over Emma’s phone, trying to get a look at the screen. “And why are you using a BlackBerry? I thought you got rid of that thing.”
Emma slipped her phone back into her pocket before Madeline could see. Sutton’s Facebook posts flitted into Emma’s mind. She straightened up and gave Madeline the same coy look she’d seen her sister make in the YouTube videos. “Wouldn’t you love to know, bitch.”
As soon as she’d finished saying the words, Emma clamped her mouth shut and sucked in her stomach. She wouldn’t have been more surprised if a bouquet of daisies had popped out of her mouth. Comments like that ended up on her CISS list, not in her day-to-day conversation.
Madeline let out a haughty sniff. “Fine, ho beast.” Then she whipped out her iPhone. A big sticker of a ballet dancer on the back said SWAN LAKE MAFIA. “Smush in!”
Everyone pressed together and smiled. Madeline held the phone outstretched. Emma stood on the end, grinning weakly.
And then they started down the driveway. The night air had cooled significantly, and the jumbled aromas of the charcoal grill, citronella candles, and cigarettes wafted into Emma’s nostrils. Gabriella and Lilianna walked and tweeted at the same time. As they bypassed the front door to cut around the stone path on the side of the house, Charlotte pulled Emma back so they were walking alone.
“Are you okay?” Charlotte straightened her flutter-sleeved dress so that her thick bra strap didn’t show. Her arms were dotted with thousands of freckles.
“I’m fine,” Emma said breezily, even though her fingers still trembled, and her heart banged madly against her ribs.
“So where’s Laurel?” Charlotte pulled a tube of lip gloss from her purse and smeared it over her lips. “I thought you said you were going to drive her here.”
Emma’s eyes darted back and forth. Laurel. That was Sutton’s sister, right? She wished she had a Wiki-Sutton application on her BlackBerry or something. “Uh . . .”
Charlotte widened her eyes. “You ditched her again, didn’t you?” She wagged her finger playfully in Emma’s face. “You’re a bad, bad sister.”
Before Emma could reply, they stepped into the backyard. Someone had strung a banner that said GOODBYE, SUMMER! across a salmon-colored storage shed. Girls in long, flowing maxi dresses and boys in Lacoste polos filled the patio. Two muscled guys in drenched HOLLIER WATER POLO shirts stood in the pool with two skinny girls in bikinis on their shoulders, poised for a chicken fight. A girl with curly hair and long feather earrings laughed way too loudly with a younger, hotter version of Tiger Woods. There was a long table filled with Mexican hot dogs, vegetarian burritos, sushi rolls, and chocolate-covered strawberries. Another table held a bunch of bottles of soda, fruit punch, and ginger ale, and two big jugs of Beefeater and Cuervo.
“Whoa,” Emma couldn’t help but blurt when she saw the liquor. She wasn’t much of a drinker—she and Alex had once drank too much playing a Twilight drinking game and took turns puking in Alex’s mom’s Zen rock garden. And she never knew what to do at parties either. She always felt shy and reserved, the freak foster kid with no home.
“Right?” Madeline murmured, sidling up to Emma. Her gaze was on the table, too. “Casa Banerjee has gone downhill since Nisha’s mom died. Her dad’s so oblivious these days, Nisha could probably have crack pipes as door prizes and he wouldn’t notice.”
Someone touched her arm. “Hey, Sutton,” called a tall, buff, captain-of-a-sports-team type. Emma smiled broadly. A petite dark-haired girl waved at Emma from the drinks table by the French doors. “Your dress is so pretty!” she cooed. “Is it BCBG?”
Emma couldn’t help but feel a tiny twinge of jealousy. Not only did Sutton have a family, but she was wildly popular, too. How come Emma had gotten such a crappy life and Sutton had gotten the great one?
I wasn’t sure about that, considering Emma was alive and I wasn’t.
More kids passed by, brightening when they saw her. Emma grinned and waved and laughed, feeling like a princess greeting her loyal subjects. It felt freeing and almost . . . fun. She understood why sometimes the shyest kids could climb onstage in school plays and completely lose their inhibitions.
“There you are,” growled a sexy voice in Emma’s ear. Emma whirled around to see a handsome blond guy in a gray fitted polo and long khaki-green shorts. A familiar Facebook photo shimmered into her mind: Garrett, Sutton’s boyfriend.
“I haven’t heard from you all day.” Garrett handed Emma a red plastic cup filled with liquid. “I called, I texted . . . where have you been?”
“I’m right here!” I wanted to scream. Brief flashes of kisses, hand-holding, and prom slow dances with Garrett flitted in and out of my brain. I distinctly heard the words I love you. A longing feeling struck me hard.
“Oh, around,” Emma answered vaguely. “But someone’s got to cut the cord a little, don’t you think?” she added, poking Garrett lightly in the ribs. It was something Emma had always been dying to tell every overprotective boyfriend she’d had in the past, the kind who texted her nonstop and freaked if she didn’t immediately reply. Plus it sounded like something Sutton might say.
Garrett pulled her close and stroked her hair. “Good thing I found you.” His hand moved from her hair to her shoulder, then dangerously close to her boob.
“Um . . .” Emma jerked away.
I was so happy she did.
Garrett raised his palms in surrender. “Sorry, sorry.”
Then her BlackBerry vibrated against her hip. Her heart leapt. Sutton.
“Be right back,” she said to Garrett. He nodded, and Emma wove through the crowds of people toward the house. When Garrett turned to talk to a tall Asian guy in a World Cup jersey, Emma crouched low and darted to the side gate.
She turned to glance at the party once more and noticed someone staring at her from the large teak table across the patio. It was a dark-skinned girl with big eyes and a tightly drawn mouth. She wore a yellow wrap dress and a gold cuff on her bicep. It was Nisha, from Sutton’s tennis team photo. This was her party. She stared at Emma as though she wanted to hoist her by the scruff of her neck and throw her out on her butt.
Even though every ounce of Emma’s be-nice-and-don’t-make-trouble being wanted to wave and smile, she steeled herself, thought of Sutton, and shot Nisha a bitchy look. Outrage flashed across Nisha’s face. After a moment, she whipped her head around, her ponytail smacking the face of the girl behind her.
A cautious feeling flitted through me. Nisha and I clearly had issues—big issues.
Not that I had a clue what they were.
Chapter 6
WHO CAN RESIST A BROODER?
Nisha’s driveway was quiet and peaceful. Crickets chirped in the bushes, and the air was cool against Emma’s bare skin. Bluish light from a TV flickered in the window of a house a few doors down. A dog barked behind a block-wall fence. Emma’s pulse began to slow, and her shoulders slowly fell from their crunched position by her ears. She pulled out the BlackBerry and stared at the screen. The message was from Clarice: GOT YOUR NOTE. EVERYTHING OKAY? LET ME KNOW IF YOU NEED ANYTHING.
Emma deleted the message, then refreshed her inbox again. No new messages. Then she looked across the broad highway. A big floodlight shone across the Sabino parking lot. Emma gulped. The park bench was now empty. Had someone taken her stuff? Where was Sutton? And what was she supposed to do when this party ended? Her wallet had been in her bag. Now she had no cash. No ID.
Swish. Emma turned around and faced Nisha’s house. No one was in the driveway. Then, a stiff thwock echoed through the air, a soda can opening. Emma pivoted again. A figure stood on the front porch of the house next door. There was a large telescope by his side, but he was staring straight into Emma’s eyes.
Emma backed away. “Oh. Sorry.”
The guy stepped forward, his prominent cheekbones catching the light. Emma took in his round eyes, thick eyebrows, and closely shorn hair. His mouth was drawn into a straight, tense line that seemed to say back off. He was dressed more casually than the boys at the party, wearing frayed hiking shorts and a threadbare gray T-shirt that showed every contour of his well-muscled chest.
I recognized him, but of course—I should’ve been getting used to this by now—I didn’t know why.
Giggles emerged from Nisha’s backyard. Emma glanced over her shoulder, then back at the boy. She was intrigued by his sullen slouch, and by the fact that he didn’t seem to care that a party was raging next door. She’d always been a sucker for the brooding type. “Why aren’t you at the party?” she asked.
The guy just stared at her, his eyes two huge moons.
Emma walked down the sidewalk until she was right in front of his house. “What are you looking at?” She gestured to the telescope.
He didn’t blink. “Venus?” Emma guessed. “The Big Dipper?”
A small noise escaped from his throat. He ran his hand against the back of his neck and turned away. Finally Emma pivoted on her heel. “Fine,” she said, trying to sound as breezy as possible. “Hang out by yourself. I don’t care.”
“The Perseids, Sutton.”
Emma turned back to him. So he knew Sutton, too. “What are the Perseids?” she asked.
He curled his hands around the porch railing. “It’s a meteor shower.”
Emma crossed toward him. “Can I see?”
The guy stood motionless as Emma walked through the yard. His house was a small, sand-colored bungalow with a carport instead of a garage. A few cacti lined the curb. Up close, he smelled like root beer. The porch light shone down on his face, revealing striking blue eyes. A plate containing a half-eaten sandwich was on the porch swing, and two leather-bound books were on the ground. The tattered cover of the first book said The Collected Poetry of William Carlos Williams. Emma had never met a cute guy who read poetry—not one who’d admit it, anyway.
Finally he looked down, adjusted the telescope lens to Emma’s height, and stepped out of the way. Emma stooped to the eyepiece. “Since when did you become an astronomer?” he asked.
“Since never.” Emma tilted the telescope to the big, full moon. “I usually just give the stars names of my own.”
“Oh yeah? Like what?”
Emma flicked the little lens cap, which hung from a black string off the eyepiece. “Well, like the Bitch Star. There.” She pointed to a small twinkler just over the rooftops. A few years ago, she’d named it for Maria Rowan, a girl in seventh grade who’d spilled a puddle of lemonade under Emma’s desk in Spanish and then told everyone Emma was incontinent. She’d even translated it into Spanish, incontinencia. Emma had fantasized about rocketing Maria into the sky, just like the Greek gods used to banish their children to the underworld for all of eternity.
The guy let out a cough-like laugh. “Actually, I think your Bitch Star is part of Orion’s belt.”
Emma pressed her hand to her chest, like an offended southern belle. “Do you talk to all the girls like that?”
He moved a little closer to her, their arms nearly touching. Emma’s heart jumped to her throat at the effortlessness of it all. For a second, she thought about Carter Hayes, the captain of the Henderson High School basketball team, whom she’d adored from afar. She’d crafted tons of adorable things to say to Carter in her Ways to Flirt list, but whenever they were alone together, she’d always somehow found herself talking about American Idol. She didn’t even like American Idol.
The guy tilted his head up to the sky again. “Maybe the other stars Orion carries around could be the Liar Star and the Cheater Star. Three naughty girls who were dragged by their hair to Orion’s cave.” He looked at her meaningfully.
Emma leaned against the railing, feeling the words carried some special connotation she couldn’t possibly decipher. “It sounds like you’ve done a lot of thinking about this.”
“Maybe.” He had the longest lashes Emma had ever seen. But suddenly his gaze felt less flirty and more . . . curious, maybe.
And suddenly a flash about him came to me. It wasn’t a memory exactly, just an odd mix of gratitude and humiliation. It disappeared almost immediately, nothing more than a glimmer.
The guy broke his gaze away and vigorously rubbed the top of his head. “Sorry. It’s just . . . we haven’t really talked since . . . you know. A while.”
“Well, there’s no time like the present,” Emma said.
A whisper of a smile appeared on his lips. “Yeah.”
They looked at each other again. Fireflies danced around their heads. The air suddenly smelled like wildflowers.
“Sutton?” a girl’s voice called through the darkness.
Emma turned. The guy’s shoulders stiffened.
“Where did she go?” someone else asked.
Emma smoothed her hair behind her ears. She peered across the front yard and saw two figures in Nisha’s driveway. Lilianna’s black Doc Martens clonked as she walked. Gabriella held her iPhone outstretched, using a flashlight app to lead the way.
“Be right there!” Emma yelled back. She glanced at the guy. “Why don’t you come over to the party?”
He made an indignant scoff. “No thanks.”
“Come on.” She kept smiling. “I’ll tell you all about the Slutty Star, the Nerd Star . . .”
The girls reached the end of the guy’s driveway. “Sutton?” Lilianna yelled, squinting in the porch light.
“Who is that?” Gabriella called.
Slam. Emma whipped around. The guy was gone. The dried wreath that hung on the front door shook back and forth, the lock closed with a click, and the blinds on the big bay window to the right quickly twisted shut. Okaaaay.
Emma walked slowly off the porch and across the yard.
“Was that Ethan Landry?” Gabriella demanded.
“Were you talking?” Lilianna asked at the same time. Her voice rippled with intrigue. “What did he say?”
Charlotte appeared behind the Twitter Twins. Her cheeks were flushed, and her forehead looked shiny. “What’s going on?”
Gabriella paused from texting. “Sutton was talking to Ethan.”
“Ethan Landry?” Charlotte’s eyebrows shot up. “Mr. Rebel Without a Cause actually spoke?”
Ethan. At least I could now put a name to his face.
And so could Emma. But then she took in the girls’ confused looks. Leave it to her to instantly bond with a guy who wasn’t one of Sutton’s preapproved friends. At that, she pulled out her phone again. There still weren’t any new messages or texts.
Charlotte’s gaze felt like a piercing-hot laser; Emma had a feeling she had to come up with an explanation—fast. “I think I’ve had too much to drink,” she blurted.
Charlotte clucked her tongue. “Oh, sweetie.” She grabbed Emma by the arm and steered her toward the long line of parked cars. “I’ll take you home.”
Emma straightened up, relieved Charlotte had bought her story. Then she realized what Charlotte was offering. She was going to take her to Sutton’s home. “Yes, please,” she said, and followed Charlotte to her car.
It was a relief to me, too. Back at my house, maybe we’d finally get some answers.
Chapter 7
THE BEDROOM EMMA NEVER HAD
Charlotte pulled her big black Jeep Cherokee alongside the curb and shifted it into PARK. “Here we are, Madam,” she said in a fake British accent.
She had driven Emma to a two-story stucco house with big arched windows. Palms, cacti, and a couple of beautifully maintained flower beds covered the gravel front yard. Flowers in big stone pots lined the archway to the front door, wind chimes dangled over the front porch, and a terra-cotta sun sculpture hung over the three-car garage. Etched into the side of the mailbox at the curb was a simple letter M. Two cars sat in the driveway, a Volkswagen Jetta and a big Nissan SUV.
I could only come up with one word for it: home.
“Someone sure got the short end of the twin stick,” Emma muttered under her breath. If only Becky had ditched her first.
“What was that?” Charlotte asked.
Emma picked at a loose thread on her dress. “Nothing.”
Charlotte touched Emma’s bare arm. “Did Mads freak you out?”
Emma regarded Charlotte’s red hair and blue dress, wishing she could tell her what was going on. “I knew it was them the whole time,” she said instead.
“Okay.” Charlotte turned up the radio. “See you tomorrow then, drunky. Remember to take lots of vitamins before you pass out. And, hey, sleepover at my house on Friday? I promise it’ll be good. My dad’s still out of town, and my mom won’t bother us.”
Emma frowned. “Your dad’s out of town?” The man she’d seen at Sabino Canyon popped into her head.
A worried look crossed Charlotte’s face, the first crack in her armor Emma had seen all night. “He’s been in Tokyo for the past month. Why?”
Emma ran her hand along the back of her neck. “No reason.” The guy on the trail must have been someone else.
She slammed the car door and walked up the driveway. The air smelled citrusy from the orange and lemon trees in the front yard. A silver windsock flapped on the eaves of the front porch. The swirling patterns in the stucco reminded Emma of icing on a cake. She peeked through the foyer window and saw a crystal chandelier and a grand piano. Small reflective stickers on an upstairs bedroom window said, CHILD INSIDE. IN CASE OF FIRE, PLEASE RESCUE FIRST. No foster family had ever bothered to put those stickers on Emma’s windows.
She wished she could take a photo, but then she heard an engine rev behind her. Emma turned and saw Charlotte watching her from the curb, one eyebrow raised. Just leave, Emma silently willed. I’m fine.
The Jeep didn’t budge. Emma scanned the sidewalk, crouched down, and overturned a large rock near to the porch. To her astonishment, a silver key glimmered underneath. She almost burst out laughing. Hiding keys under rocks was something she’d seen on TV; she didn’t think people actually did it.
Emma climbed the porch stairs and stuck the key into the lock. It turned easily. She stepped across the threshold and gave Charlotte another wave. Satisfied, Charlotte pulled away from the curb. The engine snarled, and the red taillights vanished into the night. And then Emma took a deep breath and pushed open the door to the house.
My house, not that I could recall much of it. The creak of the porch swing I used to sit on and read magazines. The smell of the lavender room spray my mom drenched the place with. I could distinctly remember the sound of our doorbell, two high-pitched, tweet-like dings, and that the front door would sometimes stick a bit before opening. But other than that . . .
The foyer was cool and silent. Long shadows dripped down the wall, and the tall wooden grandfather clock ticked in the corner. The floorboards creaked beneath Emma’s feet as she took a tentative step onto the striped carpet runner that led straight to the staircase. She reached out to flip on a nearby light switch, then hesitated and pulled back. She kept expecting alarms to sound, a cage to drop over her head, and people to jump out and shout, “Intruder!”
Grasping the banister, Emma tiptoed up the stairs in the darkness. Maybe Sutton was upstairs. Maybe she just fell asleep, and this was all a big misunderstanding. This night could be salvaged. She could still have the fairy-tale reunion she’d imagined.
A brown wicker hamper stuffed with dirty towels sat just outside a white-tiled bathroom at the top of the landing. Two night-lights glowed near the baseboard, casting yellowish columns of light up the wall. Dog tags jingled from behind a closed door at the end of the hall.
Emma turned and gazed at a bedroom door. Pictures of supermodels on a Parisian catwalk and James Blake and Andy Roddick playing at Wimbledon hung at eye level, and a pink-glitter placard that said SUTTON swung from the knob. Bingo. Emma pushed gently at the door. It gave way easily and soundlessly.
The room was fragrant with notes of mint, lily of the valley, and fabric softener. Moonlight streamed through the window and spilled across a perfectly made four-poster bed. A giraffe-print rug sat to its left, and an egg chair in the corner was strewn with T-shirts, bikini tops, and a few balled-up pairs of sports socks. On the windowsills were candles in big glass jars, blue, green, and brown wine bottles with flowers protruding from their mouths, and a bunch of empty Valrhona French chocolate wrappers. Every available surface was covered with pillows—there were at least ten on the bed, three on the chair, and even a couple of others strewn around on the floor. A long, white-wood desk held a sleeping MacBook Air laptop and a printer. A single card that said SUTTON’S EIGHTEENTH BIRTHDAY BASH! FABULOUSNESS REQUIRED! was propped up next to the mouse. A filing cabinet beneath the desk had a big pink padlock on the handle and a sticker that said THE L GAME. Was that like The L Word?
But there was one crucial thing missing, Emma thought. Sutton.
Of course I was missing. I gazed around the quiet room along with Emma, hoping it might spark a memory—or a clue. Was there a reason the window that faced the backyard was halfway open? Had I deliberately left a copy of Teen Vogue open to an article about Fashion Week in London? I couldn’t remember reading that issue, let alone why I’d stopped at that page. I couldn’t remember any of the items in this room, all the things that used to be mine.
Emma checked her phone again. No new messages. She wanted to look around the house, but what if she bumped into something . . . or someone? She reached for her phone and composed a new text to Sutton’s number: I’M IN YOUR BEDROOM NOW. WHEREVER YOU ARE, TEXT ME BACK TO LET ME KNOW YOU’RE OKAY. I’M WORRIED.
She pressed SEND. A split second later, a muffled ding-dong emanated from across the room, which made Emma jump. She moved in the direction of the sound, a silver clutch bag next to the computer. She unzipped it. Inside was an iPhone in a pink case and a blue Kate Spade wallet. Emma pulled out the phone and gasped. The text she’d just written glowed on the screen.
She immediately began to scroll through the day’s texts. There was the last one Emma had sent. Above that, at 8:20, was a text from Laurel Mercer, Sutton’s sister: THANKS FOR NOTHING, BITCH.
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Sara Shepard
Тип: электронная книга
Жанр: Современная зарубежная литература
Язык: на английском языке
Издательство: HarperCollins
Дата публикации: 16.04.2024
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О книге: From the author of the New York Times bestselling PRETTY LITTLE LIARS comes a killer series, THE LYING GAME.Sutton Mercer had a life anyone would kill for – and someone did. But thanks to a view from the afterlife and Emma Paxton, her long-lost twin sister, Sutton has a chance to solve her own murder. Emma slips into Sutton’s old life to piece together her disappearance. But can Emma keep up the charade long enough to discover what really happened to Sutton…or will she become the next victim?Let the lying games begin.